
ellievsbear
TVSTRANGERTHINGS
Mike Driver
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
trying on a metaphor
todays bird
Xuebing Du
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
Game of Thrones Daily
Not today Justin
Today's Document
AnasAbdin

shark vs the universe
Jules of Nature
Cosimo Galluzzi
almost home
taylor price
will byers stan first human second
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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@juliicaesar
Sorry That I Haven’t Seen You In Six Months Because I’m Depressed and My House Is a Mess Because I’m Depressed and I Can’t Talk about What I’ve Been Doing Lately Because I Haven’t Been Doing Anything Lately Because I’m Depressed: the Trilogy
And even when I start to get better, I will avoid you out of shame for all of the above: the sequel.
Omfg… So so so so much this.
this just in.. The New Meme On The Block is unnecessary footnotes and anyone who doesn’t like this idea can kiss this¹
_____________________
¹ my ass
not all who mcfreakin wander are mcfreakin lost
I’ve never seen a more british sentence in my life.
My "stay in bed all day" game too strong
things she did twice: THAT
Schrödinger’s boys
FUCK
What about cracking open a cold milkshake
As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison.
mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town
pretty much every vegetable you hated as a little kid would taste better if you roasted it with salt and olive oil instead of boiling it
The truth shall set you free
also sometimes if you just try it again with an adult palate because this is also a developmental issue little children are far more sensitive to bitter and metallic flavors it’s an evolutionary defense against poison
reblogging for science and culinary advice.
shit who the fuck was trying to poison their kids so much that we evolved into a species that kids need a mechanism against poison?????
Richard III
I really like it when the scientific and historical / literary sides of Tumblr come together.
The most ridiculous complaints that customers have made to me
“One of your cashiers has a huge zit on her cheek. It was gross looking and I lost my appetite. She should have popped it before she came in this morning.”
“The cashier over there was counting money. As a joke, my ten-year-old started shouting random numbers. The cashier made an angry face and now my son is upset. He has no right to get angry at a little kid who doesn’t know any better.”
“Cashiers shouldn’t be drinking water bottles while on the clock. What if they put vodka in there?”
“One of your employees has way too many tattoos and does her makeup way too dark. I don’t like her funky colored hair either. It’s trashy and unprofessional. I won’t be shopping here anymore.”
“If the pregnant girl wanted to have relations out of wedlock, that’s up to her, but she should be wearing a fake wedding band while she’s working. I don’t want my children to think that premarital sex is okay.”
“Some of your cigarettes are marked as ”$1 off". You shouldn’t sell them. They condone smoking.“
“I was told I couldn’t bring my 15-year-old son into the liquor section. It wasn’t like I was buying booze for him!”
“The cashier farted silently while she was ringing me up. It smelled horrible.”
“You shouldn’t allow people to bring their service dogs in the store. I don’t like dogs. They make me uncomfortable.”
“You really shouldn’t let your employees go home in the middle of a rush.”
“I let my son eat a banana while I was shopping. I told the cashier. She said that bananas go by weight and she can’t ring them up without the actual product. She told me it was fine and just to remember for the next time, but I know she didn’t mean it so I felt obligated to run all the way back to the produce department and grab another one so that she could charge me.”
“There are way too many foreigners working here. You should be more concerned about making sure Americans are employed.”
“You should build a separate bathroom for employees.”
“I pulled into a handicap spot. One of your cart pushers told me I had to move. I may not be handicapped but I have had a very long day and I don’t have the energy to walk across the entire parking lot.”
“Not hiring my son because of his age is discrimination. I got him his working papers on his 14th birthday last week. That should be enough.”
“Cashiers shouldn’t let customers bag their own purchases under any circumstances.”
Wow people are awful
the only way to read these is in a white suburban mom voice
never fall in love with someone’s potential