You can watch/listen to their main seasons Fantasy High and The Unsleeping City as well as to their sidequest Escape from the Bloodkeep for free on their Youtube and on Spotify, those seasons are fully available on those platforms.
All their other seasons, including "sequels" to both Fantasy High and Unsleeping City, as well as other seasons like A Crown of Candy, Tiny Heist, Mice&Murder, Pirates of Leviathan and their sidequest that is currently airing called Misfits and Magic, are currently only available on the website Dropout.tv for 5$ a month, as well as a lot of other great content from College Humor.
Seasons will be uploaded to YouTube and Spotify at one point, but that takes time.
[Image Description: The top image is of a triangle with the words, âgatekeep,â âgaslight,â and âgirlbossâ at each point. In the center of the triangle is Daisy DâUmpstaire from Mice and Murder. The bottom image is of a triangle with the words, âmanipulate,â âmansplain,â and âmalewifeâ at each point. In the center of the triangle is Sylvester Cross from Mice and Murder. End Description.]
After the terrible month that has been March, I finally had enough time to write this out. So even though it has been a while, let's return to the friendship dynamics between the Bad Kids and today? Today let's look at Fig Faeth and Gorgug Thistlespring.
Fig, who is the rockstar, the archdevil, the girl who charms and disguises herself into and out of every situation she comes across. Who went from the bubbly and girly Figueroth Faeth to "just Fig", who smokes and does drugs and makes out with middle-aged doctors in her free time. Who makes diy-fishnets, skips her classes and is
Gorgug, who tried to make sure that his statue was the only thing big and noticeable about him. Who is kind and gentle and doesn't even realize that people bully him until it is pointed out to him and will still only defend himself on very few occasions. Who will let himself be hurt if that means that the people he cares about are safe or at least safer.
But I think that Fantasy High: Sophomore Year has made it more clear than ever, why these two are best friends and get along so well and easy. Because it has shown us more than before, that both of them struggle a lot with imposter syndrome and thinking that they don't really deserve all the good things that happen to them, even if it shows itself in different ways.
Fig feeling like the "Fig" that her parents, friends, and Ayda love, isn't the real Fig and like all of these people, that she cares so much about, would leave and abandon her if they knew what she was really like and like she tricked them into being with her and liking her.
Gorgug, who feels like the life that he is living at the moment has to be a dream, a vision after his death because there is no other way, how somebody as stupid, useless, and weird as him, could actually have all these cool friends, a girlfriend and be anything else than the backpack-catching loser, that he still thinks he is.
Ant that is why they are such a good pair and such good friends after all. Understanding each other but on such a deep and underlying level that has nothing to do with deliberately thinking about what the other could need but just knowing it. Working around and with each other flawlessly.
Gorgug knows to give Fig the same support that she so often gives the others. To let her be free and herself, only offering little questions and commentary but other than that trusts her and her abilities and just makes sure that she stays as safe as possible. Not only trying to protect Fig, like in the fight in the Black Pit but also the people that Fig cares about, like Gilear whenever he feels like he needs to. Trusting her abilities to not only save herself or him but also their friends like with Kristen in the forest of the Nightmare King, when he asked Fig if she could get Kristen out faster. Letting her teleport him, without even knowing where, but trusting her judgment and plans.
Fig knows about Gorgugs self-doubt and the problems he has with standing up for himself and the things that he believes in. So she will always be the first one to compliment him, comfort him or support him in whatever it is that he does or says. When he fights, when he first started talking to Zelda, all the times he thought that people were his dad, when he talks bad about himself, or the time where he died. She knows that behind his kindness, behind his nervousness, that he is smarter and more capable than most people realize, and trusting him to protect her in battle or when both of them raced through Leviathan together and she trusted him to hold her.
No matter how much these two doubt and even sometimes hate themselves, between the two of them is so much trust, so much love, and so much support. There is never the question if they are gonna trust the other person, the question is always just if they can help. It is a deep understanding that has shown itself since probably the third episode and has just continued to grow stronger over these years that they have known each other!
The Magnus Archives // Wolf 359 // The Bifrost Incident // The Starless Sea // Fantasy High, Sophomore Year // Janus Descending // Falsettos // Madoka Magica // Into The Woods // Person of InterestÂ
[ID: A collection of quotes and lyrics from the above pieces of media. In order, they read:
1. ARCHIVIST: Cut the tether. Send them away.
  Maybe we both die. Probably. But maybe not. Maybe, maybe everything works out and we end up somewhere else.Â
  MARTIN: Together?Â
  ARCHIVIST: One way or another. Together.Â
2. MINKOWSKI: This has gone far enough! Either no one else diesâŚ
  EIFFEL: Or we all go. Amen, Commander.Â
3. Loki touches her shoulder, and they embrace. With tears flowing freely, Loki explains what they have to do. They cannot prevent what they have touched following them into our world, but they can delay it. Keep the train on the track as long as possible. Together.
4. âThis is not where our story ends, he writes. This is only where it changes.â
5. NIGHTMARE ADAINE:Â Do you ever fear that the kindness shown to you by your friends is a reflection of their character? Our family did not love us. And perhaps there is some trait of us that made that easy.
ADAINE (crying): Yeah, I fear that all the time. I fear it every day. But I know that my friends do love me. And so, maybe thereâs hope for us yet.
â6. This isâŚour final captainâs log. I wonât be seeing you again, Axe. But we promise, youâll be seeing usâŚ.Weâre coming home.
7. Lovers come and lovers go / lovers live and die fortissimoÂ
8. Donât forget. Always, somewhere, someone is fighting for you. As long as you remember her, you are not alone.Â
9. Maybe we forget / they are not alone / no one is alone / someone is on your side / no one is alone.Â
10. âSomeone once asked me if I had learned anything from it all. So let me tell you what I learned. I learned everyone dies alone. But if you meant something to someoneâŚif you helped someoneâŚor loved someoneâŚif even a single person remembers youâŚthen maybe you never really die. And maybeâŚthis isnât the end at all.â]
i will NEVER get over kristen choosing to heal riz over herselfâŚno hesitation. just immediately healing him. this goes hand in hand with how self sacrificial she is in order to save other people. kind of similar to how gorgug takes hits for everybody else because he KNOWS he can take it so it should. theyâre both sides of the same coin, theyâre self sacrificial but in different ways. in this essay i will
With the theme of this season of "The Unsleeping City" being loneliness it just makes it more obvious how much care, love and trust all the PC's and even specific NPC's have for each other.
It is about the support between Dale and Sofia after years of being divided by both death and secrets. Between Sofia and Pete with both of them knowing each others struggles and being so casual about it, not making a big deal out of it. Between Ricky and Cody with all the supportive and healing spells that they work on each other to make sure that they stay save, even when they didn't have a very good relationship. Between JJ and Ricky with Ricky being probably the first one to care about where JJ came from, what his motivations are and JJ giving back by helping Ricky in battle.
It is about the work between Kingston and Liz, who had to work so hard for the love and relationship that they both share now but it being worth it. Between Iga and the Dragon, with Iga having to go against everything she knew to right the wrongs committed by her family and who got stronger through that.
It is about the balance between Ricky and Esther, in their daily lives and in battle, in their personalities and their fighting styles, working out like a perfectly oiled machine just like both of them deserve. Between Pete and Kingston who were supposedly the exact opposite of each other but through that managed to open up new possibilities and gave each other dreams, hopes and goals for the future.
It is about the understanding between Pete and Cody, when Pete saw Cody in the same spot that he was in last season and tried his best to make sure that Cody didn't feel how he felt at times. Between Ricky and Sofia with both of them having so similar coping mechanism when they are feeling bad and just seeing the best in each other. Between Sofia and Esther, with both of them being influenced so much by their positions and all the responsibility they put on their own shoulders.
It is about Iga and Cody, Iga and her children. It is about Pete and Nod, Pete and Rowan. It is about Rowan and Sofia, Rowan and Kingston. It is about Kingston and Willy, Kingston and the Dragon of Bleecker Street. It is about Ricky and the Questing Blade, Cody and the Questing Blade. It is about Kugrash and Sofia, Kugrash and Ricky.
This whole season is about friendships, about love, about trust and respect. It is about growing together and having each others back. It is about relationships that are platonic, that are romantic, that have been sexual but ended up being platonic in the end, that have been antagonistic but became friendships.
It is about all the connections you have to others and that others have to you, it is about not being alone even if it might feel like it sometimes and I just think that that is quite nice.
Does anybody else ever think about all the things Gorgug went through in the first season, especially because of Fabian and Fig?
I definitely do and sometimes I also ask myself what would have happened if Fantasy High (especially Season 1) wasn't known to quickly forgive and push away those things for the sake of the story and the fun and jokes.
Because Gorgug was bullied. Nobody wanted to have anything to do with him. He was hit, shoved and hurt in school and nobody did anything about it. There were rumors that spread around the whole town and even adults and strangers treated him weirdly and bad because of those rumors.
And we have seen how Adaine responded the one time when Gorgug was hurt by Ragh, immediately casting a spell on him, so what if she had seen Gorgug going home with new bruises every day and had noticed him getting quieter than he already was?
She more than all the others knows what it feels like, when people who were supposed to care about you and respect you, are actually the ones hurting you and then treat you and your pain as if they don't matter in the great scheme of things.
So I can imagine her getting Kristen, Riz and Gorgug together and discussing with them that they can't let this go on any longer. Gorgug would insist that it is okay and nothing he can't handle, but Adaine would be adamant and Kristen and Riz would be quick to agree with her.
They would confront Fig and Fabian about the situation, but those two would fail to see the real problem, like in canon. Would say "Yeah, it got out of control, but now we got Penelope in our hands and that is what we need, right?" And no matter what Riz, Adaine or even Kristen say, they won't understand.
And Adaine will stand up and tell them that she hopes that maybe Penelope will let them into her Adventuring Group then and will take of with Kristen, Riz and Gorgug. And from that moment on the Bad Kids will "officially" consist of only for kids and two will be left behind in the cafeteria.
Fabian and Fig will pretend that it is nothing, like the others will come back to them eventually, but they will be wrong. Adaine, Riz, Kristen and Gorgug won't come back to them, will not talk to them and will not even look at them when they cross paths in the school hallways.
Riz will make sure that the seat next to Gorgug in his barbarian classes is always blocked by him. Fig will see Kristen, Riz, Gorgug and Adaine meeting at the Gukgaks and laughing at the vending machines. Fabian will see Gorgug in the boys restroom with a black eye and a bleeding nose but before he can say anything Riz will appear with an ice pack and stare daggers at Fabian until he leaves.
And it will take a while for them, but they will get to know that they need to do something, and that a simple apology won't cut it. So they will buy the other four gifts, make sure that the rumors stop (either by beating people up or just threatening them), will get into fights with Ragh and other Jocks to defend Gorgug when he isn't around.
And they will apologize, to the Bad Kids but especially Gorgug. And it will take quite a while until the four will trust Fabian and Fig fully again, but it will happen eventually and they will grow stronger through that.
It is just that I am a sucker for actions having consequences, but the people who do something bad growing because of it because they aren't evil or bad people in general. And I love how that could highlight the relationships between especially the four that would stay together, but also Fig and Fabian. And also between each of them and Gorgug.
And I wish I could write fanfiction about this, but sadly I am not confident enough in my own knowledge of the English language. So count this as just another new series of me dumping "What-If"-scenarios on you guys, that I can't stop thinking about and that I think would be either neat or sad.
Okay, hear me out. A lot of the times when I say âI never could have imagined how much their dynamic would mean too meâ, or âI didnât know how emotional their friendship would make meâ I mean that, but i exaggerate a little bit for the dramatics of it.
But when it comes to âThe JocksTMâ I completely mean that and not only because I could have never imagined that they would take Ragh with them on their adventure in FH:SY and that we would get a whole season of amazing content with him and the other boys. But because we got that, and all three of them mean quite a lot to me, letâs talk about Ragh Barkrock, Gorgug Thistlespring and Fabian Aramais Seacaster.
And what I love most about them, is the fact that all three of them have their own problems with masculinity, what it means to be a man, personality traits that are seen as masculine and just general toxic masculinity. And all three of them had to go through a journey in these two seasons of finding their way through all their misconceptions and helped each other with that quite a lot.
Gorgug, who always saw himself as the opposite of everyone around him, especially his parents, who were kind, small, talented, smart, understanding and never once raised their voice. And Gorgug? Gorgug is tall, big, âstupidâ, strong, a loser, angry and full of rage that he himself doesnât really understand. And because of that he has always seen himself as less than everyone else. Because everyone else who he saw as good, were the complete opposite of him, so there was no way, that he could be good or smart or talented too, right?
Ragh who didnât have a father figure growing up, and I am not saying that that is inherently bad, but that has lead to him desperately searching for one. And in the end he found it in Coach Daybreak, a homophobic racist who was mean and rude to everyone that was different. And he found a best friend (a crush) that was all these things as well: homophobic, a bully, rude and mean. So of course, if the important men in his life are like that, that means that this is the way to be a man, right?
Fabian, who wanted to be just like his father in any way since he was a little child. Strong and brave and fearsome and Bill Seacaster drove that into Fabian as well. That Fabian had and should be like him, should be strong and brave and fearsome and the leader, because a Seacaster doesnât follow, he leads. And of course Bill never meant any harm in that, he just wanted to be sure that his boy wouldnât go under in this big world, but it send a message to Fabian, even from a young age on. There was one way to be a man, to be a hero, to be good. And for that you had to hide your emotions, you had to lead, you had to make people fear you, that was everything that matters, right?
No! No to all of that, because with each other they learned that those things were not true and that there was another way for them, a better and healthier way.
Like Gorgug, who saw that you could be big, strong and angry. That you could be a barbarian and an half-orc and you could rage and none of that made you bad, none of that made you less than anyone else around, none of that meant that that was all you had to be. You could rage but also be kind. You could get angry but still be supportive towards the people around you. You could be strong and made to hurt others and still help them in a different way than physical like through relating to them, like with Ragh on the Bloodrush field. Through getting to know them and knowing what means a lot to them, like with Fabian and the Hangman. Through offering emotional support, like with Ragh and the hug and kiss, or Fabian and the hug or Fabian and Ragh and the countless chestbumps between these three.Â
Like Ragh, who saw that the men around him were not friends, were not family, were not people worth looking up or towards too. Who learned that you could be kind, nice and sweet, like when Gorgug kissed him at Prom. That you could be strong and witty, like all his conversations and fights were him, Gorgug and Fabian work together. That you could let yourself be supported, like the hugs shared with Gorgug. That you could let yourself be weak and emotionally vulnerable, like in the van when he talked about his mum. And none of that made you less of a man. None of that made you deserving of getting hurt emotionally or physically. He learned that he was a men, but he was also himself and himself first and whatever he needed and wanted was nothing to be ashamed about, even in the name of being manly.
Like Fabian, who saw that there was more to being a man than what his father told him, that his father didnât know everything and that his father wasnât ideal either. No, Fabian learned that he could show his love for people and it would be appreciated, like when he promised Gorgug to buy him an orange or when he told Gorgug that he was a really good friend. He learned that he could let himself fall and he would be caught and helped up again, like when Gorgug repaired the Hangman, gave him and orange or planted the sword of the Seacasters in front of him again and again. He learned that he could show emotions and that this didnât make him weird or weak, like when he cried after biting the glass and Ragh told him to be honest about if he cried. He learned that there was more to masculinity than what he was used to, that one could be kind and sweet like Gorgug or open and supportive like Ragh and still be able to absolutely kill it.Â
These three boys learned what masculinity really meant and really could mean. They hugged, (platonically) kissed, held onto each other, followed each other, held each other when times were rough. And through everything they never lost trust or faith in each other. And for three boys, teenage boys, that could seem weird to others, it seemed weird to others. But those others didnât understand how much these boys needed that, how much was actually behind their friendship, how much these boys have grown because of each other.
But these three have known (âWe will do great things Ragh Barkrockâ), do know (âYou are a true friendâ) and if it is on them? Will always know (âSpringbreak, I believe in you!â)Â
âi need a fucking weaponâ is SO powerful and iâm not going to be over it but i just keep thinking about how helpless ricky must be feeling. the dream team has two weeks of downtime and ricky doesnât have his own activity, he gets looped into codyâs. they cast locate object but they can only do it five times a day and they find nothing. ricky goes to work at helping hands and he comes home to esther doing her work at the society conning the order and itâs not that ricky doesnât love his work and his normal life but thereâs a dragon egg and three spirits heâs connected to and null and iga being gone and normalcy feels wrong.
when ricky gets home he runs upstairs but even six seconds is too late. he rolls investigation and he gets a nat one, because rickyâs job isnât to know things and usually thatâs okay but now itâs really not. sofia finds the pregnancy test in the bathroom and ricky doesnât. it doesnât feel like betrayalâsofiaâs his friend and estherâs friend and ricky doesnât have a problem with her knowing, if he thinks about itâbut it feels like failure. because rickyâs job isnât to know things but he should know this. he should know esther. he should be the kind of person who esther can trust.
ricky stammers and grasps for a spell, any spell that can help, because nothingâs there for him to hit. he tries locate object again and thinks estherâs staff, estherâs jewelry, i need to find her and it hasnât worked for him for weeks and we donât even know if it works this time because kingstonâs already texting everyone to go to gramercy!
when ricky matsui calls out âi need a fucking weaponâ and esther sinclairâs silver bat slams into his hand itâs SO much. itâs something of estherâs telling him that this weapon belongs in his hand but also that their relationship and their connection is real and concrete and powerful. itâs an arcane focus arcing with lightning (part of him notes that thatâs a fire risk) telling him he is magical even when heâs been casting spell after spell and not having them work. itâs a weapon that ricky can do something with because ricky matsuiâs been feeling helpless but he has always been and will always be a hero no matter whatâs in his hand
It has been a while, so I guess here I am, talking about more Fantasy High friendships, because that is what I do best:
And listen. Maybe it is just something about the symbolism of the main damage dealer and the healer of the group, but I adore Kristen and Gorgug and their friendship so much and it makes so much sense why thinking about them makes me emotional.
Gorgug Thistlespring didnât have any friends, as far as we know, for years. Nobody to talk to, nobody to spend time with, nobody that cared about him. He was always too big, too angry, too quiet and to sensitive, so it was way easier for others to bully and make fun of him, instead of trying to get to know him and be his friend. And of course he had his parents, that love him so endlessly, but he always saw himself as less than them. He saw these talented, smart, kind gnomes that were always nice and sweet and then looked at himself and saw the exact opposite. And we have seen multiple times how Wilma and Digby, despite their best efforts, were not able to understand Gorgug either or connect with him.Â
And then we have Kristen Applebees, who had a lot of people around her at all times, while growing up in a family with four (?) children and having the big church community around her. But most of the people around her, that werenât literal children, were either super religious, homophobic, racist or in a straight up cult that wanted to bring about the end of the world (most of the time they were even all of those things). So while she had a lot of people to talk with and that talked to her, she always had to be cautious about what to say and what questions to ask, because if she was unlucky she would get yelled at, not talked to anymore or lectured about Helio and right and wrongs.
And these two not only find each other, but a whole group of people and even partners, who love them, understand them and are not only willing to ask them questions, but also answer questions. And while that is absolutely amazing, that is something that neither Kristen nor Gorgug had before and if you are not used to that than you a promised to make mistakes and fuck up and the two Bad Kids are not exceptions from that.Â
Gorgug forgetting to prioritize talking to Zelda before he left, because he is still not used to have anyone care that much about him, that somebody might want to know where he is, what he is up to or even that somebody would want to keep in touch with him. Kristen having the fight with Tracker because it was always easier to just let things go instead of âsticking her nose into other peoples businessâ, but forgetting that Tracker loves her and trusts her and has always been so honest and open towards her, to afraid to get scolded or in trouble with Sandra-Lynn.
Maybe that Is why these two are so good for each other and get along so easily, because they both know these struggles of being terrible at communication, of not knowing what to say or when to say it or even if to say it at all. And because they both now that trouble they donât have to worry that much about accidentally hurting each other because the other will know not to take it personally. And they have been good for each other since their first day of school and have not stopped since then.
Like Gorgug always trying to to protect Kristen in battle and wanting to stand between her and the danger. Making sure that Kristen can get, where she needs to go and taking damage instead so that Kristen can help the others. Offering to carry Kristen out of the Forest of the Nightmare King before Fig revealed that she would be faster. Offering Kristen his headphones, when she needed to be blind and deaf. Apologizing for not being there for her the second time that she died.
Or like Kristen, defending Gorgug from himself when he called himself stupid. Trying his best to help him when he texted Zelda that first time. Immediately agreeing to call him Skipper when he was feeling down. Complimenting Gorgug on his strength or style. Wanting to help him built a celltower, even if she herself had no idea how to do that.
The moment they both shared in the Hangvan when Kristen found Gorgug still awake, was so important for both of them and highlighted their relationship so well. Gorgug not taking Kristens comment about how there was no time difference between Fallinel and Elmville personally, but instead using the moment to ask her, if she also had a problem with communication. Talking about how neither of them was sure how to fix their problems with their partners. Sharing the hug that they both needed so badly in that moment and then promising each other that they wouldnât make the mistakes from their relationships with each other.
They care about each other so much, with all their flaws and all their problems. Two teenagers just trying to learn and grow and help the people that they care about in their own ways and as best as they can.Â
do you ever think about how lapin had 50 hit points and keradin hit him for 51 damage? do you ever think about how if lapin had gotten a second turn he could have thunder stepped out? do you ever think about how lapin got a nat 20 arcana check to die with the knowledge that the bulb cares for no one and not the nat 20 death save he needed to not die at all?
day 14 of gorguguary: just some zac-as-gorgugs! wildinâ out!
[ID: three portraits of zac oyama as gorgug, with pointy ears, tusks, and floppy chin-length hair. the figures are colored white on a turquoise background. 1: gorgug looks anxiously off to the side, shoulders hunched, mouth in an uncomfortable âahhâ. 2: gorgug leans against his knuckles, wistful and pensive. 3: gorgug looks down at his right hand, confused, mouth open to show small round teeth.]Â
This is just a simple and small appreciation post for Zac Oyama, because Iâm talking so much about characters but never about their amazing players:
1. This man plays amazing characters in whatever campaign he is playing, that I canât not love and absolutely adore:Â
Gorgug Thistlespring, tall and strong and kind and loving half-orc, raised by two gnomes, who would do everything to protect his friends and family.Â
Ricky Matsui, selfless and heroic and naive but also so much more than that, who gives up everything he loves for people that he knows, people he doesnât know and people he will never know.Â
Lapin Cadburry, smart and stoic and âboringâ and suspicious, who always holds his cards close to his chest, until the time comes to save everyone except for himself.Â
Cumulous Rocks, quick thinking and fast acting and unafraid, who has so much love for everything magic, but will kill you and show no mercy.Â
Mavrus the Unschooled, careless and unmotivated and protective and loyal and talented, who will act like he doesnât care for the people around him but will give his everything even for people he doesnât even know.
2. When the DM gives him information to process as a character, or talks to him as an NPC you can see in his face and movements that he goes fully into character, processing whatever it is that he sees.
(Video of Zac Oyama as Gorgug Thistlespring in Dimension20's Fantasy High. He is imitating to play drums and looking deep in his thoughts, while Brennan Lee Mulligan is explaining in the background how Gorgug is coming to the conclusion that maybe he is his own dad. It is a scene from the 12 episode of Fantasy High)
3. He is such a smart player, finding the hints in the campaigns that he is playing and being so strategic when he can be (SPOILER WARNING! because this discusses specific moments when Zac was smart, strategic or figured out clues that they found)
Like as Gorgug when he caught the connection between the KVX bank and Kalvaxus, or was the first one to think that maybe there wasnât anything wrong with the picture of Rizâs dad but rather with the people that look at it.
Or like Lapin when he stayed out off the tournament to stand watch, when he averted the attention off of Amethar, when he tricked Keradin in the dungeon, all the Adventuring Partys in which Zac explains what he had planned for Lapin in the cathedral fight if it had gone differently.
And even as Ricky, especially in the second season now, when he cast that âCalm Emotionsâ spell on the werewolf that was attacking Kingston, helping Iga to go forward with Ox, being the first one to think about protecting JJ at the tunnel fight and later in the museum and also the one to think about trying to connect with JJ after everything that happened with Tony Simos.
This is not even everything that is great about Zac as a player, and even less about Zac as a person, but the rest would mostly just be a list of moments in which Zac proved why my brain was right when it went âHm, yes ... I wanna know what this manâs deal isâ when I first saw a thumbnail for Fantasy High on Youtube.
5. heard you tell the same story multiple times but doesnât point it out to you when you excitedly bring it up to them again + riz & gorgug (prompts linked here)
(starting immediately post-fhsy, and a little more angsty than the other prompt fills so far because it deals with some of the aftermath of spring break. sometimes friendship is late nights and brownie recipes and old stories.)
There are forty minutes left until Elmville when Riz digs his claws into the headrest of the passengerâs seat and clambers over the seat backs to sit shotgun in the Hangvan.Â
Everyone else is asleep, or as Riz suspects in Trackerâs case as she stays oddly still as a human pillow for Kristen in the backseat, at least pretending to. But Riz is quest-restless even though theyâre heading home, and Gorgugâs awake because heâs driving, and both of their darkvision light up the street ahead for them.Â
Gorgug doesnât look surprised when Riz lands in the seat next to him. Of course. Because his whole party knows that Riz doesnât sleep, or at least has to be told to, or has to know that there are hit points to be regenerated and a fight to be alert for the next day.Â
Streetlights speed by and Gorgug brings the van to a smooth stop at a light, accelerating smoothly up afterwards to not jostle anyone in the backseat. Heâs practiced, easy, calm. Meanwhile, Rizâs thoughts are a messy turbulent maelstrom. He canât sleep, and after everything in the Nightmare Forest if he never saw a bed again itâd be too soon. But, forget sleep, his brain isnât even letting him relax right now, and Riz is struggling to figure out the questions that are on the tip of his tongue. His fingers itch for a ball of red string, trying to figure out why he wanted to be up here with the passenger seat and the windshield and Gorgug.
âWhatâs being a barbarian like?â he asks quietly, and Gorgug doesnât exactly startle but does tip his head to the side curiously.Â
âCan I ask why?âÂ
âIâmâangry,â Riz says, surprising himself, but it feels true enough. âI killed Kalina, but she said she was with me my whole life. And I hate that.â He wants to hiss, to bare his teeth and make the hair on the back of his neck stand up, but itâs not Gorgug heâs mad at. âSometimes I wonder if I should use that to. Hit things.âÂ
âOkay,â Gorgug says.Â
âAnd youâyou know about that. About being angry, and not being. As comfortable. Or at least youâve said stuff like that.â Riz picks at his long fingernails, pretending to be nonchalant and not looking up to see if Gorgugâs insight is better than his shitty attempt at deception.Â
âTell me about why you wanted to be a rogue?â Gorgug asks instead, and Riz understands itâs not really a question. He trusts Gorgug. He thinks about it.Â
âUm, my mom was always a detective, I guess. And my dad was a spy, but I guess I didnât know that.â Riz spends a lot of his time thinking. Heâs realizing he doesnât spend a lot of time thinking about himself. Maybe he needs to make a new conspiracy board. âUh. I guess the first time I ever saw Penny sneak attack someone was really cool, I definitely knew I wanted to do that.â
Gorgug makes a soft hm? noise that asks Riz to keep talking. âBecause I was little and Pennyâs little too, and we were at the mall and some asshole catcalled her? And oh, man, you should have seen her, Penny was probably an Aguefort freshman then? But she told me to hide behind this vending machine andââ
--
Theyâre all the way home, with the Mordred Manor crew taking their stuff out of the trunk while Gorgug and Riz keep talking. Riz finished his story hurriedly as they pulled into the driveway, ending with Penny teaching Riz to make brownie bars at Strongtower after the sneak attack incident and being so cool and badass and nonchalant about making that guyâs nose gush with blood. Heâs talking fast and gesturing big like he doesnât usually, caught up in a story that he can tell well and that he hadnât thought of in a while. Him and his rogue friends are tiny badasses.Â
âThat was a good story,â Gorgug says. âRogues seem pretty cool.âÂ
Riz grins, all his fangs out and happy in the driveway of the manor. âThanks, dude.âÂ
âI think you can be angry and not a barbarian,â Gorgug says, gently.Â
And âOkay,â Riz says, gentled.Â
--
Itâs the tail end of one of Fabianâs all-out summertime ragers. The Bad Kids are in a big cuddle pile that barely fits on the picnic blanket on the lawn of Seacaster Manor, and Gorgugâs at the very bottom. Riz is tipsy on half a beer (goblin metabolisms are not good and itâs not his fault) and he thinks Gorgug looks a little lonely, lying on his stomach and tapping at his crystal with all the wind knocked out of him from everyone lying on top. He scrambles down the pile of friend-bodies and sits on the grass by Gorgug. Riz racks his brain for something good to say. He doesnât want Gorgug to be lonely, not when Riz is going to be up all night and Riz is usually the lonely one.
âDiâ I ever tell you about the first time I saw someone get sneak attacked,â Riz says, words big and bubbly and coming out too fast. He doesnât care, heâs buzzed and happy and Gorgug looks like he could use a good story.
âI donât remember, tell me,â Gorgug says, putting his crystal down face down so its glow goes dark.Â
âOh man, youâre going to love this story. It was, like, me ân Penny at the mall, and there was this real asshole of a dude, and I didnât know Penny went to Aguefort but she took out this knife? And it was like she flew at himââ
At some point in the story Gorgug falls asleep, and Riz is more pleased than annoyed. He looks cozy. And not lonely.Â
--
âWhatâs this, The Ball?â Fabian asks when Riz takes a fantasy tupperware of brownie bars out of his briefcase and puts it on the the table in the cafeteria.
âTheyâre sneak attack brownies,â Riz says.Â
It evidently does not clear up any of Fabianâs questions.Â
âPennyâPenny Luckstone?âtheyâre her recipe, she taught me how to make them the same day I ever saw her sneak attack a dude,â he explains. âShe like, jumped out from behind one of those fake potted plants at the mall and slashed him so bad with a dagger and then she didnât even get sneak attack on it but she also socked him in the nose and it was like the coolest thing Iâd ever seen. And then she just went home and washed the blood off her fist and then we made brownies.â He puts a hand on his chest. âAnd Iâll never forget it.âÂ
âOkay, The Ball,â Fabian says, but he takes a brownie.Â
Next to him, Gorgugâs already halfway into his second, nodding happily and energetically so his hair flops in front of his face. âI love that story!â he says. Heâs all leaned in, listening to Rizâs story.
Riz lights upâheâs no Fabian, with expensive magical gifts, and heâs no Gorgug either with little artificed trinkets and sweeping big gestures. But heâd remembered the story and remembered the brownies and wanted to make some, and heâs just glad his friends like them as much as he does.
âBecause the secret ingredient is sour cream,â Riz confides. Fabian fake-sputters, sending tiny brownie crumbs everywhere, and Gorgug swats at him.Â
âYou were eating it just fine before!â Gorgug says indignantly. âRespect the brownie, dude!â
âYouâre right, Gorgug,â Fabian sighs. He takes another bite. âTheyâre not bad, The Ball.âÂ
--
Riz only dimly registers footsteps pounding up the stairs and also a greataxe brute forcing its way through the booby traps at his office door. His crystal is abandoned on the floor next to him, the last text he sent to Gorgug still on the screen. Itâd been âHaving a bad time. At my office. Can you come help? Thanks, Rizâ and itâd been typed out with shaky fingers as his breaths started coming too fast, the way it does whenever he lets himself be alone in his own office for too long. Riz hates it but he needs help. He forgot the period on that text and itâs been staring at him for the past few minutes.Â
His brain is whirring too fastâShadow Cat, Kalinaâs eyes in his own eyes, Baron in his mirror in his own office, darkness and danger and Fabian in churning waters, he died in that forest and so did Adaine and so could any of his friends, bullets dodged and bullets fired and itâs too much, too much. His breaths are coming too fast but also not fast enough. Riz feels suffocated.Â
Heâs wedged himself into his own briefcase of holding, the sides squeezing his arms in a way thatâs grounding and comforting when nobody else is here in his office to help.
But Gorgug is. Gorgug is here to help now. He skids to a stop in front of Riz and sits on the floor and Riz only dimly registers it out of the corner of his eye where his head is curled into his chest trying to make himself small, make himself safe.Â
âRiz, can I touch you?â
Riz does his best to nod and Gorgug just wraps long lanky boy arms around his torso, gently lifting Riz out of his own briefcase and settling him in Gorgugâs lap as they sit on the floor of the office. He doesnât let go, just squeezes tighter. Itâs so much help, and alsoâ âCan you. Talk? Anythingâ Anythingâs fine,â Riz says.Â
âUm. Sure, Riz. I guess I can. I could list a recipe? My parents have been trying to teach me to cook more, for when we go to college in a couple of years. Iâm sorry, Iâm not like Adaine, I donât have lots of interesting things memorized,â Gorgug says, apologetic. Riz wants to be able to tell him not to be, but heâs a little preoccupied trying to make his brain tell his lungs to breathe.
âUh, so these are called sneak attack brownies?â Gorgug says hesitantly. Riz realizes what heâs doing and tries to laugh, the giggle interrupting the choked breath he was trying to take.
âTheyâre called sneak attack brownies because theyâre my badass friendâs recipe. And he learned it from his badass friend. Um, I donât know this super well, actually, but I really should by now and Iâm just going to keep talking and if itâs wrong then I guess itâs wrong? I know that you need chocolate for a brownie. And eggs and sugar. You told me the secret ingredient is sour cream.â
Riz nods, thudding his head into Gorgugâs chest a little. He takes a deep breath. Gorgugâs hoodie is soft. And heâs a good listener.
âRight, uh. After sour cream. Flour. And butter?â
âThe butterâsâ the butterâs unsalted,â Riz manages to eke out, voice small and quiet and mostly talking to his own knees.Â
âGot you. Unsalted butter,â Gorgug agrees, easy as anything.Â
âPenny saidâ Penny said that dude she punchedâs tears were salty enough, thatâs how I remember it,â Riz tells him.
âTell me more?â Gorgug asks, and he waits patiently as Riz lets his brain just focus on a recipe, an easy recipe and a badass story. It helps, to be given something focused to do. And Riz is just so, so glad he has friends who will give that to him, will listen over and over again when Riz needs to talk.Â
And Gorgug waits. And Riz tells him.Â
from the prompt list linked here! iâm closing prompts from this particular list simply because i have so many excellent ones to get through
