•Eddie•

someone buy me alcohol, thanks. I AM AN ADULT

[mariasont]

LET'S WORK IT OUT ON THE REMIX ˙⋆✮

frank and robby's unresolved resentment comes to a head when their rivalry turns sexual and they start using you as the middle ground.

MASTERLIST | RULES | PINTEREST

PAIRING michael robby robinavitch x reader x frank langdon

WARNING 18+ MDNI explicit smut, fem!reader, AFAB!reader, ménage à trois, boyfriend!langdon & boss!robby, freaks being freaks, hate sex?, robby and langdon using reader as a stress toy and therapist all in one <3, possessive!langdon, robby is condescending per usual but like in a hot way, oral (male & female receiving), robby picks up reader to throw her on mattress at one point, voyeurism, lots of pet names (sweetheart, baby, doll, etc), starts with robby and frank at odds with each other, ends with them teaming up against you... wink wink, lots of dirty talk, robby and frank talking about reader to each other, langdon lowkey degrading robby? idk yall

WC 4.2k | REQUEST here!

You didn’t think this little plan of yours all the way through. 

Which, in your defense, implies there was a point at which there had been a thought-through version, and that feels charitable now that you’re standing in the middle of your living room with a paper plate in one hand and a steadily souring sense of dread in the other.

Because really, what sort of person invites her chief attending over to the apartment she shares with her resident boyfriend while the two of them are still in the world’s iciest little bro-divorce? 

Your sort, apparently. Certified dim-bulb. Girl who sees a gas leak and thinks, hm, maybe a sparkler would improve this situation.

But in your defense the frost between them had been spreading and you were tired of pretending it wasn’t. Tired of pretending it wasn’t affecting the job itself. Everyone was.

So yes, maybe engineering one contained, inescapable little social crucible had felt wise at the time. Healing, even. Put two men in a room and let nature take its course. 

Frost can’t survive fire, you told yourself. What you failed to remember was that fire tends to not be warm in any benevolent way. Fire bites. Fire blackens. Fire leaves marks.

The proof of your terrible idea now sits on opposite ends of the sofa. Robby on one, Frank on the other, a clean swatch of empty cushion between them while they chew their food in perfect, hostile union — bite, grind, swallow, repeat — ostensibly watching the TV. 

The screen washes them in intermittent blue light, giving them both somewhere neutral to stare, somewhere that is not each other’s face. 

You give it three more seconds. A generous three, really. More than either of them deserves. Then your patient collapses inward on itself. With a sigh, you deposit your plate on the coffee table and cross the room.

If they want to commit to this pageant of masculine emotional constipation, fine. You can be disruptive. You turn and reverse yourself right into Frank’s lap, crossing your legs at the ankles.

His breath catches against your neck, a fracture in an otherwise composed exterior, surprise or shock of you climbing on him in front of your boss, but he stays statue-still except for the palm that migrates to your thigh and clamps there. 

“Robby, you still think their rookie QB’s gonna choke in the red zone?” you ask, making a doomed little bid for peace with the ragged scraps of football knowledge you’ve managed to absorb by osmosis, your chin tipping toward the drive unfolding onscreen. 

Without so much as a glance your way, Robby grunts, “Kid’s overdue for a disaster,” a verdict delivered to the television but seemingly tagged for his recovering subordinate to his left.

The half-smirk that follows is pure instigation, and Frank answers it the only way he can in mixed company: “Disaster? He just took them eighty yards in two and a half minutes. Think that earns him at least a little faith.”

And spiteful tone notwithstanding, the words pass between them minus bloodshed, which you decide counts as a victory.

Maybe not a large victory, not something they’d name a holiday after, but you’ll take whatever pocket-sized miracles the universe is handing out before it changes its mind.

Robby finally cuts Frank a sidelong look, head ticking just enough to register annoyance. “Faith won’t change the fact he’s already gift-wrapped the defense a few choice turnovers. Odds say he does it again once the end zone feels too close for comfort.”

Frank’s knee bobs once with a scoff, bouncing you with just enough force that your t-shirt shifts, neckline dipping. Robby’s gaze snaps there like iron to a magnet; he tips his beer to hide a grin, but the swelter in his stare is anything but subtle. 

Interesting.

It’s not the first time you’ve caught Robby looking at you like that.

There have been other moments, in passing, usually at work. You’ve caught him with that glazed, faraway stare before he could reel it back in when you bend over a counter to grab a pen or crowd too close beside him in those paper-thin scrubs.

It’s always just been filed away under things that are none of your business, because you are Frank’s and happily so, and desire from other men has always struck you as one of those minor background inconveniences of having a body in public.

But now this feels less easy to write off. Like all that tension that had been hard and almost boring in its predictability has warped into something else entirely. It feels humid and unstable and just this side of visible. 

You can’t name it yet, but it waits there all the same, right at the edge of articulation, poised like it knows you’ll eventually have to. 

“Real rich, coming from you,” Frank says to himself and you, but the tail end mutters itself into “— jackass.” 

They both return to the TV after that, or pretend to, shoulders squared forward, expressions set into the particular blankness of men who are absolutely not done arguing but have decided, temporarily, to ferment.

You take advantage of the attention shift, letting gravity slump you into Frank’s chest, hips shifting in an absent figure-eight as you settle. It would’ve been innocent if the movement didn’t drag you directly over the hard proof of his excitement beneath you.

Your brows lift.

Another interesting development.

Useful, too, knowing whatever strange atmospheric disturbance has rolled through the room has not passed over him untouched. Not just Robby, then.

“Easy.” His inhale saws across your nape, voice pitched for you alone, the consonants clipped and almost panicked. “You tryna start something?”

You really weren’t, but you know he’s not in a position to believe you right now after you made a show of climbing on top of him not two minutes earlier.

Across the cushions, Robby’s tongue drags across his lower lip like he’s cleaning a knife, bottle slack in his hand.

“Hmm? Third-and-four, babe. Pay attention.”

“You don’t even know what third-and-four means,” he growls under his breath. “You’re already on thin ice after springing Robby on me — so do us both a favor and quit squirming.”

“Should probably listen to him, kid,” Robby says suddenly. You and Frank turn at the same time, guilty in stereo. He reclines deeper into the couch, lids at half-mast, utterly unmoved by Frank’s incoming glare. “If Langdon wants you to quit squirming it’s only ‘cause he’s struggling to keep up,” he drawls, eyes flicking to the tell-tale bulge under your ass. “Guy’s never been great at thinking and feeling at the same time.”

You don’t even have time to be embarassed before Frank’s growling, “You don’t know what you’re talking about, Robby.”

“Is that right?” he challenges with raised brows. “Well, you’re welcome to show me.”

Heat prickles along your neck, a phantom fingerprint.

Surely that’s not the invitation you take it as. You just have your mind in the gutter. A mind that happily projects the image anyway. Robby reclined in that same spot, beer perched on his knee, gaze foggy with lust while Frank’s mouth maps yours and your hips test how steady the good doctor’s hands really are.

It is, on reflection, not nearly as appalling a thought as it should be, which feels like a separate problem and also, perhaps, the main one. 

“Relax, Frank. If you can’t handle it, just say the word — I’m happy to keep her occupied.”

Oh. You stand corrected.

Frank’s lips peel back in something just shy of a grin. His hand slips from your thigh only long enough to cup your jaw, turning your head until the room blurs to the halo of his face.

“She’s already occupied,” he tells Robby, but his eyes stay on you, a dare stretching between eyelashes. 

You don’t blink. Don’t breathe. Don’t so much as twitch, and that tiny surrender is apparently all the permission Frank needs.

His lips crash into yours, teeth scraping, soda-sweet fizz sparking on this tongue while his arm bands tight around your waist. The couch groans under the sudden torque of bodies. Denim grinds denim until sparks pop behind your eyes and every rational neuron shrugs, clocks out, leaves libido in full command.

The instant your mouths part for air, Robby’s bottle clinks onto the table.

You turn just as he leans in, forearms braced on his knees, broad shoulders now blocking half the TV’s glow. Up close, his stare tracks the smear of Frank’s spit on your bottom lip, the way your chest still heaves in uneven intakes. 

A shadowy smile carves on cheek as Robby tilts his head, dark eyes roaming from your swollen mouth to Frank’s white-knuckled grip on your thigh.

“Could use a closer angle,” he mutters. 

“By all means,” Frank sneers, one fist gathering your waistband, tugging you a slow quarter-turn until you’re astride him, chest to chest, knees snug to his hips.

On the short but damning list of Professional Conduct Hell-Nos, “make out with your boyfriend while your boss spectates” probably ranks very high. Somewhere between falsifying patient charts and starting a fistfight in the ambulance bay. Possibly above stealing narcotics, which feels in poor taste to think with both men in the room, but then again, the evening has already wandered several zip codes past good taste.

It wanders even further when Frank kisses you again.

The list of reasons this is wrong atomizes into glitter until even Robby’s razor-keen gaze becomes another blur at the edge of the frame, taking in tremors you no longer have the bandwidth to hide.

But the awareness of the extra set of eyes of you only seems to dump pure accelerant into your bloodstream until you’re arching into Frank and rolling your hips down against the thick seam of his fly, bumping perfect pressure against your clit.

A wet rush answers between your thighs, lace sticking to your folds, and your breasts mash against Frank’s chest until you can feel your own heart ricochet through peaked nipples.

You break the kiss again only to clamp down on his lower lip in your teeth and tug, over-dramatic, leaving a sticky sheen that practically screams look what you’re missing, Dr. Robinavitch.

“Sure he’s convinced, Frankie?” you ask, breathless, thumb dragging over his lower lip to soothe the place your teeth had just nipped at. “Convinced I’m tied up and off-limits?” 

Frank laughs, a thin, rattled sound. His hand coasts up the slope of your back, ironing himself into every dip and imperfection.

“Dunno, baby.” He ghosts a kiss at the corner of your grin, another softer one under your jaw. His gaze darts over your shoulder to Robby, then sinks back to you, trouble puddling in the dimples you love. “You wanna show him? Show him how much you like taking care of me?”

You’re nodding before the sentence is half-born, a frantic little yes-yes-yes of motion.

In your haste you misjudge your own limbs, nearly knotting them with Frank’s before scrambling free. You drop between his thighs, the carpet scraping your knee raw as one hand shoots out to catch the dense muscle of his quad for balance.

To your left, Robby shakes loose a low, entertained hum. “Poor thing was just waiting to be useful.”

“She’s useful all the time,” Frank murmurs, and there’s no bite in it. His fingers sink into your hair and comb it gently back from your face. With his other hand, he pops the button of his jeans, zipping sliding down slow enough to hear every metal tooth give way. “Just happens to be especially pretty when she’s desperate to prove it.”

A guttural breath escapes Frank as he eases himself out, fist wrapped around a length that stands fierce in his hand, the flushed head of his cock blushing deeper with every absent pass of his thumb.

Your lips part, tongue wetting the seam, gaze fixed with the naked intent of an animal staring down dinner. Satisfaction flickers in his eyes. He offers a slow, decisive nod.

You don’t wait for a second invitation. You are many things but wasteful is not one of them.

Fingers wrap him in one cautious loop, then tighten once his inhale hiccups above you. You lean in and drag your tongue in one flat stripe from base to tip, tasting salt and the darker thing that’s only his.

He hisses through his teeth, every muscle in his thighs wiring tight under your palms, his hands balling like he’s fighting the reflex to bury them in your hair and steer.

Before he’s recovered, you’re already sliding him past your lips, and all that soft worship knifes into raw, unfiltered hunger.

His fingers finally tangle at your nape, gathering the curtain of your hair back in a practiced sweep, granting him an unobstructed view as your mouth sets a slow pulse around him. Like he needs to see every inch of what you’re doing to him or he’ll die from not knowing.

Your hand picks up the slack, stroking the length your mouth vacates.

“Jesus.”

“Told you,” Frank says. “She likes takin’ care of me.”

“I’m getting that,” Robby drawls, dryness turning brittle-sharp . “Little overeager, though.”

And you are. Eager. Greedy. Shamelessly so, student-raises-her-hand-before-the-question-is-finished so. You take Robby’s little barb as praise anyway, letting it roll down your spine, because if he wanted you less eager then maybe he should stop sounding so interested in it. 

You work him deeper, spit glazing the shaft, smearing over your knuckles. Saliva puddles in the cradle of his pants, printing a wet halo.

Frank’s head thunks back against the couch. “If you had her mouth on you, Robby,” he grits, “you’d be begging for the same… enthusiasm.”

“You offering?” Robby asks Frank. “Because I’ll admit — she’s a lot more tempting on her knees than being a smartass during rounds. I could get used to that view. Might even teach her some new tricks.”

You answer with a muffled growl that vibrates along Frank’s cock. He twitches under it.

That is such bullshit. You are not a smartass indiscriminately. You are a smartass with standards. A smartass in self-defense. A smartass only when Robby shows up in his holier-than-thou vestments and wonders aloud if you’re “having trouble following directions” for daring to question a single judgment call, or when he lofts that patronizing brow at a truth everyone else is simply too cowardly to say, or when he coaxes your attitude out of you with all the patience of a snake charmer and then acts scandalized when it finally bares fangs. 

And yes, fine, maybe you’ve needled him once or twice simply because the little pinch of his mouth brings you joy.

Sue you. People have hobbies. Frank has terrible coping mechanisms. You have this. 

Your nose nudges the downy trail at Frank’s belly, saliva threading between your lips as your throat opens, then you draw up in one long, slow drag.

Warning flashes through every tense line of him a second before his breath punches out in a fractured little curse.

“Fuck, sweetheart —”

Frank’s fist eases you off him, and when your mouth slips away with a wet pop, he’s panting, cock flushed bruise-dark, a string of precum still kissing the corner of your lip before it snaps.

“Sorry — shit. You keep doing that and I’m gonna come down your throat in front of your boss.” 

You shrug. “I wouldn’t mind.”

Robby whistles. “Pretty sure we crossed that line a while ago, Langdon.”

Something hair-thin cracks across Frank’s face, a little fault line opening where the smirk had been, sour and old and too personal for the room you’re currently kneeling in. You can’t place it. Can’t tell how Robby managed to find the bruise when he’d only seemed to brush the skin. 

“Kind of rich, you saying that.”

Robby’s smile doesn’t move, but his eyes freeze over. “You implying somethin’?”

“Implying nothing. You love quoting policy til it suits you to break it.”

“You wanna pick a fight with me right now?” Robby scoffs. “Because I gotta say, your sense of timing’s still shit.”

“At least I’m consistent” 

“Listen, Langdon, the day I take a lecture on —” The rest of Robby’s retort dies when you stand, stepping straight into the line of fire and blotting out the last scrap of civility left between them.

This is what you wanted, right? The attention snapping toward you. Both of them suddenly silent because you have become, for one second, more interesting than their pride.

You catch both set of eyes as your fingers hook beneath the hem of your shirt, skimming it up your ribs, knuckles brushing the goose-pimpled slope of your stomach.

The cotton’s off before either man can inhale a protest, pooling at your feet like a dropped flag, and for a heartbeat you let them see you in nothing by the pale, breath-strained lace of your bra: straps sliding, cups stretched indecently tight, nipples pebbling hard enough to ache.

You reach behind, flick the clasp, and let the bra fall too, shoulders rolling back so your breasts lift, unapologetic, into the hush. 

Frank reacts the way he always does, as if this is a miracle he’s somehow been deemed worthy of witnessing — never mind that he’s had your tits in his mouth four times already this week. 

But it’s Robby’s look that reroutes every living cell in your body. No wide-eyed marvel here, just pure clinician, jotting mental footnotes on nipple angle, respiratory excursion, overall breast biomechanics.

He’s studying you so hard you swear the room compresses, a slow squeeze that coaxes your back to arch and your knees to drift tighter, slick pulse drumming a reminder of why you stood up in the first place. 

You channel their attention straight into your backbone, thumbs hooking the waistband of your shorts and tugging until they puddle beside your discarded shirt, leaving you to stand in nothing but a damp lace thong.

“If you two would rather keep the pissing contest going, that’s fine,” you say. “I’m perfectly capable of finishing solo.”

A bluff — half bluff — because you could, but gods you’d rather make them beg to help.

You turn, gifting them a sway of your ass, all bravado, as you saunter toward your shared bedroom.

You make it exactly three steps. An insulting distance, really, before Frank’s hand brands the small of your back and Robby’s palm spreads wide over your belly, both of them converging so fast your brain barely has time to document the win under effective tactics.

Together, they swing you back into the wall hard enough for the plaster to kiss your shoulder blades.

The air leaves your lungs in a little hmph, quickly swallowed by Frank’s mouth claiming your collarbone, while Robby’s thigh muscles between yours and pins you there, your pussy dragging firm against his pant leg. 

“Sensitive little thing,” Frank murmurs, thumb stroking the underside of your breast while his lips charts a slow latitude up your throat.

Robby catches your chin between his fingers and tilts your face, giving Frank better access and forcing your gaze up to his at the same time. Efficient. Very attending of him.

“All that attitude for a fifteen-second wait? Spoiled, aren’t we?” He glances at Frank, amused as he jerks his thigh higher to your clit. “Think she even remembers why she started the tantrum?”

“Doubt it,” Frank answers, sliding a palm between your panties and robby’s leg to cup at the wet heat there. A tremor shoots down to your toes. “Memory’s about to get a lot worse, too.”

“Good,” Robby says, smiling crookedly as his hands make their way up your thigh. “Maybe then she’ll let the adults talk.”

Adults, you want to scoff, but Frank’s thumb circles over your clit and you forget what else you wanted to say about that. 

“Bedroom,” he decides.

“Copy that,” Robby answers, and then before you can blink, you’re scooped over his shoulder, world flipping until you’re staring at his (very nice) backside.

His hand smacks your ass once, proprietary punctuation as Frank follows, tossing directions like you’re precious cargo being delivered: “Second door on the left.”

You hit the mattress with a squeak. Plush bedding cups your spine, breasts pitching up and down before settling into a slow rhythm that seems to hypnotize them both.

You blink up into the twin eclipse of their silhouettes. Four eyes drinking you in. Every rise of your chest pulls a twitch from Frank’s jaw, drags Robby’s lower lip between white teeth. Shared silence of men who have finally found a reason to put their differences aside. 

Robby looks to Frank for permission. “Can I?”

Frank gives one curt nod. “Hands and mouth only.”

“I can work with that,” Robby says. 

He crawls forward, knees depressing the mattress, settling between your thighs. 

He leans in, and suddenly his eyes are galaxies: black centers swallowing brown until just a thin halo glows like caramel on a burner. 

It’s a weird feeling. How Robby, the same man who can watch arterial spray and merely sigh for suction, is gazing down at you like he’s the one white-knuckling the edge. 

But then the galaxy eyes disappear and in their place returns Dr. Robinavitch. Cool and insufferably sure. His expression settles into something almost cruel, like he’s caught you noticing the crack and intends to punish you for it.

“Look at you,” he murmurs, thumb stroking a glistening stripe through your underwear. “Soaked through already. That’s pathetic, sweetheart.”

He punctuates the verdict with an almost tender kiss to the inside of your knee, then another, higher. Instinct yanks your thighs together, but Frank is suddenly there on your right, palm bracketing one knee and pressing it outward again.

“Don’t hide now,” he chides.

A raw, useless sound breaks from your throat.

“There she is,” Robby praises, mouthing higher. “Nothin’ smart to say?”

You do. You must. Somewhere. But you find only ache. Voice trembling, you plead, “Please… Robby.”

He answers with action, sealing his lips over your clip through the fabric, drawing a slow, punishing suction that makes you cry out. 

Frank’s hand pushes your abdomen down, steadying the tremor, while his voice near your ear sounds: “That’s it — let him see how polite you can be.” 

You look to your right to see his cock sitting against his stomach, free hand doing lazy strokes up and down the base.

Robby hums low, mouth dragging down the damp seam of your underwear in languid swipes. His tongue flattens, gathering your taste, then flicks upward. His nose nudges your swollen bud with every rise. 

“Press a little harder right there,” Frank tells Robby. “She’ll act like it’s too much, but she likes it. Don’t let her squirm away.”

Robby listens. You hate that, you decide. How he’s on Frank’s side now.

You had been counting on his natural contrarianism to save you from Frank’s encyclopedic knowledge of all your most intimate buttons. No suck luck.

He bears down on the pulse point Frank named, then tongue-blades upward. White heat flashes through you and you flinch, trying to shear sideways, but his grip tightens, thumbs denting soft skin. 

“Uh-uh, baby — stay right there and take it,” Frank croons, the up and down rhythm he approaches with his cock kicking up speed. “You know it feels good, let him give you every drop.”

Robby works you relentlessly, sloppy and dirty, tongue alternating broad licks and focused circles that make you arch off the bed. You bury both hands in his hair, nails scratching his scalp, unable to keep your moans at bay.

“Good girl,” Frank drawls. “Let him make it up to you. All those times he’s been a dick at work. Seems only fair he uses his mouth for something useful.”

Robby shoots him a murderous side-eye but doesn’t slow. Instead he hums, vibration punching straight through the fabric. Your moan breaks into pieces — so close you can taste it. 

“Michael, I’m gonna —”

He hears his first name like a starting gun. His tongue locks onto your clit in punishing patterns, each lap faster than the last, crooked nose grinding everything just right. 

In two heartbeats the world pinpoints to a blistering of sensation. Your vision whites out, fingers clawing uselessly at this hair and the sheets as your climax slams through you. A ragged cry spills against Frank’s thigh while every muscle locks, then ripples.

Still, Robby doesn’t relent. His mouth stays on you, tongue lapping through the quake, coaxing aftershocks that make your thighs quiver against his braced shoulders.

Only when tremors give way to trembling afterglow does he ease back, breath hot against the sodden fabric, leaving you boneless and blinking, pleasure echoing through every nerve like a fading siren. 

Robby lifts his mouth, chin and beard glistening. 

“Thought about this every damn shift,” he says, tongue darting out to chase another bead of you from his lip. “Tastes even better than the fantasy, doll.”

Your eyes drag into focus by inches.

“That’s wildly unprofessional,” you mumble, the words softened by the fact that your thighs are still trembling around his head. You try to look stern. You suspect you look freshly exorcised. “You should probably report yourself.”

Frank’s hand tightens where it rests on you, his voice dropping to something rougher. 

“Don’t worry, baby. We’ll give him plenty to confess to.” He looks over your body, then to Robby. “Think she’s ready to find out what happens when we stop taking turns?”

“She’s ready,” Robby responds. “And if she isn’t, she’ll tell us. Won’t you, angel?”

A twin grin blooms across two previously warring faces.

This is not how you pictured getting Frank Langdon and Michael Robinavitch back on the same page. 

But if this is what conflict resolution looks like nowadays, who are you to stand in the way of progress?

MARIA NOTE posting and ghosting this one bc i lowkey don't know what came over me when i wrote it

[moldedover]

haha wow you’re such a gentle and fatherly figure in my life, can i suck you off???

[cinnxmxngxrl]

Shared Custody pt 2

Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x reader

FIRST PART Updates Account

You convince yourself that sleeping with Robby was just a one-time relapse, and return to the co-parenting routine you’ve carefully built. But everything unravels when you’re dragged into a family vacation at a resort in Mexico. One full week of trying to survive Robby’s relentless attempts to win you back.

warnings/tags: smut, minors DNI, porn with plot (lots of plot), age gap (but readers age isn’t disclosed), jealous!robby, co-parenting, GirlDad!Robby, this is long as fuck so read it with time, they’re still down bad for each other, unprotected piv, semi-public sex, handjob, blowjob, fingering, creampie

You remembered that day as if it had been yesterday. The cold porcelain of the toilet seat under your thighs. The pregnancy test stick clutched in your trembling fingers while you tried to aim. The uncertainty that made every sound echo louder in your tiny studio apartment, the best place a med student could afford. The steady drip-drip-drip from the leaky faucet. The nervous pacing of Robby’s footsteps just behind the thin wooden door.

“You good in there?” he asked, you could picture him leaning in, pressing his ear against the wood like he could somehow hear your thoughts.

You quickly wiped away the silent tears that had been streaming down your cheeks. “Yeah…” Your voice came out shaky and small. “Yeah. I’m done.”

You wiped, flushed the toilet, and stood up on unsteady legs, pulling your pants back on. Carefully, you set the cup and the pregnancy test on the edge of the sink before washing your hands.

“Can I come in?” Robby asked from the other side. Guilt was already eating him alive. This was his fault. He should have been the one guiding you, teaching you how to become a great doctor. Instead, he had jeopardized everything,  your education, your career, your future. Now, because of him, you were taking a pregnancy test in a cramped bathroom, wondering what the hell you were going to do with your life if two pink lines appeared.

You didn’t answer with words. You simply walked to the door, opened it, and stepped aside so he could enter. “It says three to five minutes,” you murmured, nodding toward the test resting on the sink.

“How—” Robby cleared his throat when his voice threatened to crack. “How are you feeling?”

“Scared?” The word came out like a question. Truthfully, you didn’t even know if “scared” was the right word. What was the right word for finding yourself in a situation you’d never wanted, knowing it was your own damn fault? You should have been more careful. You should have said yes the first time he asked about wearing a  condom. You should have told him to pull out instead of moaning “fill me up, Robby” every single time like you had lost all sense. 

You knew the odds. You knew the risks. But when he was inside you, none of that had mattered. And now destiny was laughing in your face. You had no plan. If you were pregnant… what then? Goodbye to med school. Goodbye to your dream of graduating and matching into emergency medicine. You’d probably have to move back in with your parents and spend your days raising a child instead of becoming a doctor. And goodbye to Robby, because why would a man like him want to stay tied to the med student he’d accidentally gotten pregnant and the baby he never asked for?

Fresh tears slipped from the corners of your eyes, soaking your cheeks instantly. You tried to stay quiet, but the sobs broke free anyway.

“Hey, hey, hey… come here.” Robby closed the distance in one step. The heat of his body wrapped around you like a shield. He slid one strong arm around your waist, anchoring you against his solid frame, and the other hand cradled the back of your head. “It’s perfectly normal to be scared. But you’ve got me. You’re not alone in this.”

“What are we—” Another sob escaped, muffled against his shoulder. “What am I gonna do, Robby? What am I supposed to do?”

“Whatever feels right,” he whispered against your hair, pressing a gentle kiss there. “You’re supposed to do whatever you want to do. You have all the choices.”

“But which one is the right one?” You pressed harder into him, as if you could disappear into his chest. “Which one won’t make you hate me?”

“Jesus— Look at me.” He gently cupped your face with both hands, lifting it from his chest so you had no choice but to meet his eyes. His own were red and watery. “Let me say this once, and I need you to hear me. I could never hate you. None of this is your fault. It’s no one’s fault… this just happens, okay? If the test is positive, then… it’s not the end of the world. We’ve got options. We have time to think about it.”

“Then why does it feel like it is the end of the world?” You tried to hide your face again in the broad warmth of his chest, where your tears had already left a dark patch on his shirt. He wouldn’t let you. He kept your face cradled between his palms, one thumb softly stroking your cheek as he wiped away another tear. 

“Why does it feel like no matter what I choose, you’ll end up resenting me for it?”

“I won’t,” he assured you again, his voice steady even though you could feel how hard he was trying. “You have to think about what you want. Nothing is more important than that. I’ll be here for whatever you decide.”

“What if I don’t want to keep it?” The words tumbled out. “Wouldn’t you feel like… like I took something away from you? Wouldn’t you think I’m selfish?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think.” He leaned in and kissed the tip of your nose, his warm lips making you shiver. Then your cheek, tasting your tears. Then your lips, reassuringly. “If the test is positive and you choose to terminate 6he pregnancy, I wouldn’t think that makes you selfish. I wouldn’t think you’re a bad person or that you’re stealing something from me. I’d think you’re strong. I’d think you’re being brave. And I’d be right there with you.”

The calmness in his voice steadied you a little. You could tell he was terrified, probably having a panic attack on the inside, but he was pouring every ounce of strength into not showing it. He wanted to be the rock you could lean on, the one who had answer, who knew what to do, who’d be there to support you no matter what.

“Is that what you’d want?” he murmured against your lips. “An abortion?”

“I don’t know,” you whispered, so softly he might not have heard if he weren’t so close. “But… maybe it’s the only right choice. What would I even do with a baby? I’d have to drop out of med school… I’d fall so far behind. Raising a baby… I don’t know when I could even go back.”

“It doesn’t have to be like that, you know?” he said gently. “A lot of women finish their studies while pregnant. They work while being moms too. Think of Dr. Shamsi, she finished her residency while—”

You knew he meant well, but right now the last thing you needed was a pep talk about strong women. “Yeah, well, I’m not Dr. Shamsi, Robby,” you cut in, the words coming out harsher than you intended. “I don’t think I can do it. And I can’t… I can’t put that weight on you. That burden. A child, Robby. I’d feel so guilty knowing I trapped you.”

An incredulous laugh escaped him. He pulled back just enough to really look at you. “Trap me? Jesus fuck… do you even hear yourself? When have I ever made you feel like you’d be trapping me?” 

His tone edged toward anger, which only made your own flare up. “You didn’t ask for this! You’d be stuck with a child you never even wanted just because I didn’t want to get rid of it!” You couldn’t meet his eyes anymore and stared at the floor instead.

“A child…” He let out a slow breath. “A child doesn’t sound like the worst thing in the world.” The words he’d been too afraid to even think until now finally slipped out. “Yeah, it would be difficult. Yeah, it would be a fucking challenge. I’m not gonna lie, I’m scared. But I don’t think a baby would be the worst thing to ever happen. Not by far.” 

He’d be lying if he said he had never dreamed of having a child, of becoming a father. In his mid-twenties, he had pictured it so differently. Finding the love of his life, getting married, waiting a year or two before having their first baby, then another one soon after. A proper family. But life had gotten in the way, long hours in the ED, the weight of responsibility, his own fears and insecurities reshaping the entire trajectory of his existence. Time slipped through his fingers, and before he knew it, the dream had been pushed further and further into the distance. Definitely not like this, a baby at forty-nine with the fourth-year med student he’d been sleeping with in a messy situationship for only a few months… that was never part of the plan. And yet, as that pregnancy test sat on the edge of the sink, the possibility grew heavier, more real. Maybe this was how it was meant to happen. Maybe the universe had finally caught up with him. Maybe it was time to stop running, time to stop hiding, and finally commit to something bigger than work. Something that actually mattered. Something that’d change his life and give it a new meaning, a new purpose.

“You’re saying you’d want it?” you asked, surprise flashing in your eyes as you finally looked up at him. “If I were pregnant… you’d want the baby?”

“I’m saying I want you to do what you want. But yeah… if you chose to keep it, then I’d want it too. I’m in, 100%.” Behind the fear in his voice, you heard absolute certainty.

“And how would that even look?” you asked quietly. “How would we do it?”

“If we’re doing it, we do it right. Together.” He took your hands in his, brushing his thumbs over your knuckles. “You could move in with me. Once the baby’s born, we’d arrange our shifts so one of us is always with them. We’d get a sitter to help us so you can still have time to do your residency. You have me. You’ll have me every step of the way.”

“Promise?” you whispered.

“Promise.”

Silence stretched between you, as if the rest of the world had stopped spinning. In that tiny bathroom, it was just the two of you, holding each other’s hands with the promise of facing whatever came next together.

“I think it’s been over five minutes,” Robby said finally, glancing toward the sink. “Want to check?”

You nodded, and Robby released one of your hands, picked up the test, and held it between you without looking at the result yet. “Together?” he asked.

You swallowed. “Together.”

The imposing voice of Dana cut through the fog in your mind. “Earth to you… hello?”

You blinked, startled, and reluctantly dragged your eyes away from the computer screen where you’d been pretending to chart for the last ten minutes. Dana was leaning against the nurses’ station counter with one hip, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Are you even listening to me right now? Because I’ve been talking to myself for five minutes. What’s up with you? You look like you didn’t close an eye last night.”

You forced a small, nervous laugh and quickly looked back down at the computer, hoping the glow of the screen would hide the exhaustion on your face. “Sorry… I slept okay,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and unbothered. You weren’t fooling anyone, least of all Dana. You could feel her eyes studying you, taking in the faint shadows under your eyes, the slight slump of your shoulders, and the way you kept subtly shifting in your chair. Because no matter how hard you tried to focus on work, your body was still painfully aware of last night. The ghost of Robby’s thrusts still lingered between your thighs, a delicious ache that refused to fade even twelve hours later. 

Every time you moved, you were reminded of how hard he had taken you, how thoroughly he had ruined you. Your muscles were sore in the best and most inconvenient way possible. You crossed your legs under the desk, trying to ignore the throb that pulsed through you at the memory. The last thing you needed was Dana figuring out why you were so distracted. Unfortunately, Dana had the observational skills. She narrowed her eyes even further, tilting her head as she continued to stare at you. “Yeah… sure you did.”

Dana drifted his gaze past your shoulder down the corridor. Her expression shifted almost imperceptibly, lifting her brows a fraction and her mouth twitching like she’d tasted something sour. You followed her line of sight to Robby, striding toward trauma two, wearing his navy scrubs and cargo pants. There was a loose, easy roll to his shoulders, a confidence in his steps that screamed satisfaction. The corners of his mouth were curved in a half-smile that was the unmistakable “I got laid and it was fucking amazing” look.

Dana let out a dry huff of laughter, crossing her arms over her chest. “Jesus. I hate when he walks around with that ‘I got laid and it was amazing’ face. It’s obnoxious as hell. Makes the rest of us feel like we’re doing it wrong.”

You kept your face carefully neutral, tapping your fingers against the keyboard, but without writing anything. “Maybe he’s just in a good mood.”

“Oh, please, don’t give me that. You know that face, it’s always the same with that man.” Dana tilted her head, studying him as he paused to talk with Victoria, that satisfied smile lingering a beat too long. She narrowed her eyes, thinking hard for a second, then her head snapped back toward you when realization hit him. “Wait a minute… That face. That exact face is too familiar. It’s not just his regular ‘I got some’ look. That’s the same damn face he used to wear back when you two were sneaking around four years ago. And I haven’t seen it on him once since you two called it quits. Not a single time.”

Heat flooded your cheeks instantly. You felt cornered, exposed, like a deer caught in headlights. Dana ran this place, nothing escaped her eyes. Trying to lie to her was usually pointless, she could smell bullshit from miles away. “I– I really need to finish these charts,” you stammered. “I promised Hannah I’d try to get home early so we could—” The excuse died on your tongue, it sounded pathetic even to your own ears.

She looked at you like she’d already decided you were guilty. “Please tell me you didn’t do it.”

“Didn’t do what?”

She snorted. “You’re a terrible liar. Always have been.”

You exhaled through your nose, dropping your shoulders in defeat. You glanced around the nurse station. It was quiet, no one close enough to overhear, then leaned in just a fraction.“Okay,” you muttered. “It was one time. One weak moment. I’m not doing it again.”

Dana didn’t t look surprised, just disappointed in the resigned way of someone who’s watched this film before and knew how it ended . “You’re so stupid,” she said, almost fondly. “Letting that mess of a man back in again.”

“I know.” You rubbed a hand over your face, wishing you could teleport anywhere but here. “I know. I’m just… so weak when it comes to him. He’s got this way of looking at me, like I’m the only thing in the room that matters, and the way he touches me…” You trailed off. “God, Dana, you don’t know how good it is. How he remembers every single—”

She held up a hand with the palm out. “Stop. Right there. I do not need the details. I’ve worked with that man for the last 20 years of my life, and I still got to work with him for the next eight hours. Spare me the play-by-play.”

“Sorry. It’s just… it felt like coming home, you know? And then this morning reality hit like a truck. And I realized I fucked up last night.”

Dana studied you for a long beat, and her expression softened just a fraction, enough to show the concern underneath.“Honey,” she said quietly, “you’re not weak. You’re human. And that man has always known exactly which buttons to push with you. But you’ve built something solid these last five years. Don’t throw that away because the sex is good.”

You nodded, swallowing hard. “I told him it was a one-time thing. A relapse. I’m not doing it again. I swear.”

Dana arched her eyebrow high. “You swear.”

“Yeah.” You met her eyes even if your stomach twisted. You were embarrassed to let anyone know about your poor life choices, but if you could trust anyone, that was Dana, one of the only people who’d been here since the start of your story with him. “Last night was… it was stupid. It won’t happen again.”

She studied you for a long beat, then she pushed off the counter, stepping closer and dropping her voice to that tone she used when she’s done playing nice.“You'd better not. Go out. Meet someone. Anyone whose last name isn’t Robinavitch. Someone who can actually commit to a relationship.”

You looked down at your hands, still faintly wrinkled from too much hand sanitizer, a nervous habit you’d gotten out of him. “It’s not that easy.”

“It’s not supposed to be easy,” she countered. “But it’s supposed to be possible. Find a guy who doesn’t bolt after a month because he ‘feels trapped’ and ‘needs space.’ Someone who doesn’t look at commitment like it’s an impossible mission. Someone who stays.”

The words sting because they’re true. Robby never lied about it, he’d told you early on he wasn’t built for the long haul, that relationships felt like another thing he’d inevitably fuck up. And when Hannah came along, when the exhaustion and the shifts and the fear piled up, he didn’t fight to keep you together. He just… drifted. Back to separate houses, separate beds, separate lives. 

“Hon, you know Robby was not made for a relationship. He’s a great dad, nobody’s arguing that. The man would walk through fire for that little girl. But you? He loves you in the way he knows how: sporadically. And that’s never gonna change. Keep it that way. Keep him in the dad column. Don’t let him back into the partner one.”

You rubbed your temples, the ache from last night’s lack of real sleep settling in behind your eyes. “I know. I do. It’s just… when he’s there, when he’s touching me, talking to me like I’m still his… it’s like the last five years never happened. Like we could pick up where we left off.”

“That’s the trap,” Dana said quietly. “It feels like home because it used to be. But homes can be haunted too.”

In the days that followed, you did everything you could to avoid Robby. At work, you kept your distance, volunteering for procedures on the opposite side of the ED whenever possible and burying yourself in charts or patient updates the moment you felt his presence nearby. Because every single time your eyes met his, even for a brief second, your body betrayed you.

You remembered the crushing weight of him on top of you that night, the way he’d fucked you into the mattress like the world was ending. You remembered how perfectly your bodies still moved together, how easily he could pull those broken sounds from your throat. Years had passed, but the fire between you hadn’t dimmed. If anything, it was burning brighter and hotter than ever, threatening to consume every boundary you had built.

Thankfully, Robby seemed to sense your need for space and didn’t push. He gave you room to breathe at the hospital, only speaking to you when a case genuinely required collaboration. His tone stayed strictly professional, his touches nonexistent. He still called every evening like clockwork to talk to Hannah, but with you he remained carefully polite, never lingering, never teasing, never crossing the lines you had drawn. 

You should have been relieved. He was finally respecting your wishes, he was doing exactly what you had asked him to do, and yet… on nights like this, when Hannah was at his place for her half of the week, the silence in your house felt suffocating. The emptiness pressed in from every corner. No little footsteps pattering down the hallway, no giggles echoing from the living room. Just you, alone in the quiet, with nothing but your own thoughts to keep you company. And your mind refused to shut off, It buzzed loudly, relentlessly, replaying every moment of that night in vivid detail, the heat of Robby’s skin, the burn of his beard against your neck, the groan in your ear when he came undone inside you. 

You kept hearing his promises afterward: that he was a changed man, that this time he wanted you for real. Not out of duty because he’d gotten you pregnant. Not because he felt trapped by responsibility. But because he truly wanted to be with you, because he loved you. God, you wanted to believe him so badly. There were moments, weak and dangerous moments when you wished you could be reckless enough to fall for every word that came out of his mouth. To let yourself be dumb and hopeful and blind, just like you were five years ago.

Maybe you would have risked it if you were the only one who would get hurt when everything inevitably fell apart. You could survive a broken heart, you’d done it before. But Hannah couldn’t, she was innocent in all of this. She didn’t deserve to watch her parents try and fail again, to feel the instability, the confusion, the heartbreak of seeing her mother and father almost become a family, only for it to crumble. You refused to gamble with your daughter’s emotional safety just because you still craved the man who once broke your heart.

The knock on the door came right on time, just as the late afternoon sun was starting to slant through the living room windows. You were still in your scrubs, hair thrown up in a messy bun, when you opened the door to find Robby standing there with Hannah perched on his hip, her little pink backpack slung over his shoulder, making him look both silly and endearing at the same time, and her head resting sleepily against his chest.

“Hey,” Robby said softly. “We’re here.”

Hannah’s face lit up the second she saw you. “Mommy!” She reached both arms out, already wiggling to get to you. Robby shifted her gently into your arms, brushing his hand against your side in the process. The brief contact sent an unwelcome spark through you that you immediately tried to ignore.

“Hi, baby girl,” you murmured, pressing a kiss to her soft brown hair, she smelled like the strawberry shampoo Robby always used on her. “Did you have a good time with Daddy?”

“We had a great time,” Robby answered for her, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. He set her little backpack down by the couch and rubbed the back of his neck, looking unusually hesitant. 

“Listen… I’ve been thinking about something.”

You raised an eyebrow, bouncing Hannah lightly on your hip as she played with the collar of your top. “That sounds ominous.”

He let out a small laugh, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Not ominous. Just… I’m thinking of taking some days off work. Vacation days.” Your surprise must have shown on your face because Robby quickly continued. “I’ve been thinking about taking her somewhere warm. She’s been talking about the beach nonstop lately. There’s this resort in Mexico I’ve been looking at, very kid-friendly, right on the beach. Thought it might be nice for her to run around in the sand and actually see the ocean.”

Robby had never been one to take vacations. For most of his life, work had consumed him completely. He was drowning in the ED, the never-ending stream of patients, the constant pressure of being the one everyone relied on. There was always something more important, and a quiet voice in the back of his head constantly whispered that everything would crumble if he wasn’t there to hold it all together. He had never felt the pull to travel, no place ever seemed worth leaving the hospital for. Nothing could impress him or hold his attention long enough to make him want to step away. His entire identity had been tied to the job for so long that the idea of doing anything else felt foreign, almost selfish.

That was before Hannah arrived, she changed everything. From the moment she came into his life, Hannah gave him something he had never truly had before, and that was real purpose. She became the reason he woke up every single day determined to be better, to be the kind of father she deserved. The person who had to stay strong and healthy because she depended on him for everything, from teaching her how to tie her shoes, to how to be kind, how to stand up for herself. 

But Hannah had given him more than just purpose. She had awakened in him a brand-new desire to actually live. For the first time in years, his world expanded beyondwork. He wanted to do things, he wanted to see things, and more than anything, he wanted to experience them with her. His life no longer felt like it should revolve solely around the ED, he craved as much free time as he could carve out so he could share it with his daughter, watching her discover the world. He refused to miss even a single moment of her childhood while she was still small and everything felt unique to her. Hannah had unknowingly pulled him out of the endless cycle of work and survival. 

And that was how the trips began. Beach days where Hannah squealed at the waves and collected seashells in her bucket. Lazy summer afternoons fishing at a lake. Winter weekends at a cabin resort in the mountains, where they built snowmen in the backyard and drank hot chocolate by the fire. Whatever Hannah wanted to do, Robby made it happen.

You nodded slowly, processing the information. You dropped Hannah off carefully on the floor, and she immediately walked to her bedroom, mumbling something about saying hello to her stuffed animals. “Mexico… That sounds really nice for her. When were you thinking?”

“Probably in a couple of weeks, if I can get the time approved. I’d take about a week.”  He paused, watching your expression carefully. “Are you okay with that? With me taking her?”

“Yeah,” you said without hesitation. “Of course I’m okay with it. She’ll love it. Just make sure you send me all the flight information and the hotel details once you have them. I want to know exactly where she’ll be and how to reach you.”

“Already planning on it,” he assured you. “I’ll send everything as soon as it’s booked.” A comfortable silence settled for a moment. Then Robby shifted his weight and looked at you again, something vulnerable flickering behind his eyes. “Actually… I wanted to ask you something else.” He rubbed the back of his neck again, a tell you knew too well. “Would you want to come with us?”

You blinked, caught completely off guard. “What?”

“I’d pay for everything,” he added quickly. “Your flight, your room. You don’t have to worry about that. You’ve been working insane hours lately with residency. It might be good for you to get away for a few days, too. Relax. Sleep in.”

The offer hung in the air between you, and for one brief second, you let yourself imagine it. You pictured the three of you on a beach in Mexico. Hannah running barefoot through the warm sand, her hair messy from the ocean breeze, laughing with pure joy every time a wave came close enough to tickle her toes. You saw yourself and Robby sitting nearby on lounge chairs, drinking margaritas while the sun kissed your skin. The sound of the waves rolling onto the shore, lulling you into a nap you hadn’t allowed yourself in years. 

After surviving on less than six hours a night for so long, the mere idea of lying back on a lounge chair and actually resting felt almost sinful. Vacations had always been a luxury you couldn’t afford. Not with the mountain of student loans, the demands of your residency, and the constant juggle of motherhood. The thought of taking time off just to relax had felt selfish, unrealistic, and completely out of reach. And now Robby was offering it all on a silver platter.

You quickly shoved the beautiful images away before they could take root and make you weak. Because that was the problem with Robby’s offer, it wasn’t just a vacation. It was a week of playing house, of blurred lines, and of watching him be the devoted father he had become, while your stupid heart remembered exactly how good things used to feel when the three of you were almost a real family.

“Robby…” You let out a slow breath. “Thank you. Really. That’s incredibly generous. But I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

He furrowed his brow slightly. “Why not?”

“Because going on a vacation like that, the three of us,  it would be confusing. For her, especially. If we’re sharing space like a family for a whole week, she might start getting ideas about us getting back together. I don’t want to give her false hope. And it’d be confusing for us two, we need to keep our distance after… You know what.”

Robby’s jaw tightened for a moment, but his voice stayed calm. “We can get separate rooms. Hell, we don’t even have to hang out the whole time if you don’t want to. You could do your own thing, be at a different pool, get spa treatments, whatever. I’m not asking you to pretend we’re a couple. I just… I want to do this for you. You deserve a break too.”

You shook your head, even as a small, traitorous part of you ached at how sincere he sounded. “No, Robby. Thank you, but no. It’s sweet of you to offer, but it’s too complicated. We’ve worked really hard to keep things stable and clear for Hannah. Mixing a family vacation into that… it blurs too many lines. I appreciate it, I really do. But I think it’s better if it’s just the two of you.”

He watched you for a long moment, something like disappointment passing across his face, a quiet frustration he tried so hard to hide. “Alright,” he said quietly. “Message received. I’ll just take her, then. But the offer stands if you ever change your mind.”

You gave him a grateful smile, even though your chest felt tight from how much you wanted to say yes, because of how much you wished that maybe in another life, Robby and you could be those parents sunbathing in Mexico with their kid. “I won’t. But thank you.”

He nodded once, lingering for another few seconds like he wanted to say more, but decided that by pushing too hard to get close to you again, he’d only end up pushing you away. “I’ll text you the details as soon as everything’s booked.”

“Sounds good.”

Before heading toward the door, Robby paused. He gave you one last long look, the kind that always managed to slip past every defense you’d carefully built over the years. In that single glance, you were flooded with memories you spent most days trying desperately not to dwell on. Memories from five years ago, back when everything still felt possible. Back when you still believed, with naive, foolish hope, that the two of you could somehow make it work.

And then there were the much more dangerous memories from just two weeks ago, the night where, for a few stolen hours, it felt like the rest of the world had simply stopped existing. His hands on your body like he still owned every inch of it, the way he’d whispered your name against your skin, the overwhelming feeling that you had teleported back in time, back to when it was just the two of you. For those few hours, you had let yourself believe again. You had let yourself imagine that maybe, just maybe, there could still be a “we” in your future.

A couple of days later, you heard the knock of the door echo through the house just as you were finishing packing Hannah’s favorite stuffed capybara into her little backpack. You opened the door to find Robby standing on the porch. Hannah immediately squealed at the sight of him.

“Daddy!” She bolted forward, launching herself into his arms. Robby caught her with ease, laughing as he lifted her high and spun her once before settling her on his hip. “Hey, angel,” he said, pressing a loud kiss to her cheek. “You ready for Daddy’s house?”

You stepped aside to let them both in, arms crossed loosely over your chest as you watched the usual handoff routine unfold. Hannah was buzzing with energy, clutching Robby’s shirt with her little hands. “Daddy, Daddy! Are we really going to the beach soon?” she asked with her eyes wide, full of pure excitement. “With the ocean and the sand?”

Robby grinned, the kind of soft and genuine smile he only ever wore for her. “We sure are, baby girl. I already picked out a really nice hotel. It’s right on the beach. Want me to show you the pictures later when we get home?”

“Yes!” Hannah bounced in his arms, practically vibrating. “Does it have a pool? And ice cream? And can I get a new swimsuit to wear?”

“It has a huge pool, and I’m pretty sure they have all the ice cream you can eat,” Robby answered patiently. He glanced over at you while still holding her. “I booked one of the family suites with a big balcony overlooking the ocean. You’re gonna love it, Han.”

Hannah gasped dramatically, her little mouth forming a perfect ‘O’. “Mommy, did you hear? Daddy got a hotel with a balcony! For the ocean!”

You couldn’t help but smile at her pure joy, even as a knot started forming in your stomach. “I heard, sweetheart. Sounds amazing.”

Robby set Hannah down so she could run to grab her stuffed animal from the couch. The moment she was out of earshot, he lowered his voice slightly. “I meant what I said the other day. The offer’s still open if—”

Before he could finish, Hannah came racing back, clutching her capybara tightly. “Daddy, can Mommy come with us to the beach? Please?”

Robby didn’t miss a beat. He looked straight at his daughter with an innocent expression that you knew was anything but. “You know what, Han? I was actually thinking about inviting Mommy too. What do you think? Would you like Mommy to come on the trip with us?”

Hannah’s entire face lit up like the Fourth of July. She spun toward you so fast she nearly tripped over her own feet. “Mommy! You have to come! Please please please! We can build sandcastles together and swim and eat ice cream and watch the sunset and— and everything!”

You shot Robby a deadly look over Hannah’s head, the kind that promised a painful retribution the moment you two were alone. He simply raised his eyebrows in mock innocence. The bastard knew exactly what he was doing. He was weaponizing the one person he knew you could never say no to. Hannah. She had always been your biggest weakness, your softest spot, and Robby knew it better than anyone. Those big, warm brown eyes were lethal. One pleading look from her, and your resolve crumbled like sand.

And right now, she was using every ounce of that power, blinking up at you with hope while clutching your hand like her entire happiness depended on your answer. It was unfair, completely unfair. Robby wasn’t just standing by and letting her beg, he was actively encouraging it, using your daughter as the ultimate emotional leverage. He knew you could resist him, he knew you could fight your own feelings, your own desires, your own stupid heart. But Hannah? Saying no to her when she looked at you like that felt almost cruel. And the worst part? He wasn’t even trying to hide how satisfied he was with himself, that tiny twitch at the corner of his mouth said everything. He was enjoying this far too much.

“Hannah, baby…” You crouched down to her level, gently brushing a strand of brown hair behind her ear. “Mommy would love to, but I’m super busy with work right now. I have so many shifts and—”

Robby’s voice cut in smoothly from behind her. “Actually, you have a bunch of vacation days saved up. I checked it yesterday.”

You straightened up slowly, narrowing your eyes at him, silently warning him to stop this nonsense before it went too far. “Robby.”

He shrugged, completely unbothered. “Just stating facts. You shouldn’t lie to your daughter, you know?”

Hannah grabbed your hand with both of hers, swinging it dramatically. “Mommy, pleeease? Pretty, pretty please!” You opened your mouth to respond, but Hannah was already in full pleading mode, her big puppy-brown eyes, exactly like Robby’s, staring up at you with devastating effectiveness.

“I really can’t afford it right now, sweetheart,” you tried again. “Plane tickets and hotels are expensive, and Mommy—”

“If Mommy can’t pay,” Robby interrupted you. “Then Daddy will pay. I’ve got it covered. Flights, resort, activities, all of it. You wouldn’t have to worry about a single thing.”

Hannah tugged harder on your hand, bouncing on her toes. “See? Daddy’s paying! So you can come! Please, Mommy? I want all of us together. Pretty pleeeeease.”

You felt cornered, trying to come up with more excuses, but as you reached inside your head, you couldn’t think of any. Robby stood there looking far too pleased with himself, while your daughter continued her relentless assault with those lethal eyes and endless enthusiasm.

“Hannah…” you started, searching desperately for another excuse.

“But Mommy,” she whined, pressing her face against your leg, “I’ll miss you so much if you stay here.”

Robby, the absolute traitor, decided to join forces. “She’s got a point,” he said casually, though his eyes were anything but casual when they met yours. “It wouldn’t be the same without you. And like I said before, I can get us separate rooms. You can do your own thing the whole time if you want. But it would mean a lot to her… and to me.” 

The “and to me” was spoken so quietly you almost missed it. You looked between the two of them, your daughter with her hopeful, shining eyes and her father, the man you still stupidly loved,  with that steady and patient gaze that had always been able to wear you down. The silence stretched. Hannah’s lower lip started to tremble just slightly, the ultimate weapon in her arsenal.

With a long, defeated sigh, you finally gave in. “…Fine,” you muttered, rubbing your temple. “I’ll go too.”

Hannah let out an ear-piercing squeal of pure delight and threw herself at your legs, hugging them tightly. “Yay! Mommy’s coming! We’re all going to the beach together!”

Robby’s smile was slow and satisfied, though he tried to keep it modest. “That’s great,” he said softly, his eyes never leaving yours. “Really great.”

You pointed a finger at him over Hannah’s head. “You’re going to pay for this later, Robinavitch.”

His only response was a knowing chuckle. “Looking forward to it.”

Hannah continued dancing around the living room in celebration, already chattering about sandcastles, seashells, and swimming with dolphins. You stood there watching her, with your heart full of love for your daughter, loving every second of seeing her so happy, and equal parts dread and excitement about what you’d just agreed to, a family vacation in Mexico with Robby. God help you.

Hours later, the glow of your bedside lamp was the only light in the room. You were already tucked into bed, wearing an old, oversized t-shirt that had seen better days. Your phone suddenly vibrated on the nightstand, making you glance at the screen, letting out a slow breath as soon as you noticed who was calling. A Facetime from Robby. 

You hesitated for two rings, it was almost midnight, and you didn’t feel like having any possibly agitating conversation right before your bedtime, but ultimately ended up accepting the call. Robby’s face filled the screen almost immediately, he was in his bedroom too, the light of his lamp illuminating his face. His hair was messy, like he’d been running his hand through it, and his glasses were perched low on his nose, those fucking glasses… No, don’t even go there, you silently muttered to your brain

“Hey,” his voice sounded rougher, the way it always got late at night. A small smile tugged at his lips. “You already in bed?”

“Yeah,” you replied, adjusting the blanket over your lap, as if trying to cover yourself up. “It’s late, Robby.”

He hummed in agreement, slowly dragging his eyes over what he could see of you on the screen. “You look comfortable. Cute shirt.” There was a brief pause before he asked, almost casually, “So… have you started packing swimsuits yet?”

You stared at him for a moment, the irritation you’d been carrying for the past hours finally bubbled up. “Robby… we need to talk.”

Robby lifted his eyebrows slightly, but the lazy smile didn’t leave his face. “Alright. About what?”

“You manipulated me into agreeing to this trip.” 

Robby let out a low chuckle. “Manipulated? Damn, you’re using big words tonight.”

“It’s not funny,” you said sharply, though you kept your voice quiet so you wouldn’t wake Hannah. “You used our daughter to convince me, and then you joined in. That was low, even for you.”

He tilted his head, still smiling like this was all some lighthearted game. “Anything else?”

You narrowed your eyes. “Yes. You guilt-tripped me. The whole ‘it would mean a lot to her… and to me’ line? That was manipulation.”

Robby leaned back against his headboard, resting one arm behind his head, giving you an even better view of his bare chest. He looked far too relaxed for someone being accused of emotional manipulation. “Jesus,” he muttered, still chuckling softly. “Oh-ho-ho, I’m so evil, I manipulated the mother of my child into letting me take her on a fully paid week at a luxury beach resort in Mexico.” He raised an eyebrow, mock-serious. “Am I gonna go to prison for that?”

“Robby.”

“Relax,” he said, softening his tone just a fraction, though the amusement was still there. “Hannah’s excited. You saw her. She wants all three of us there. I’m just trying to give her what she wants.”

“You know exactly what you’re doing,” you shot back. “I know your real agenda behind all of this.”

He tilted his head again, looking curious now. “Oh yeah? And what’s my agenda, according to you?”

You sat up a little straighter in bed, clutching the blanket tighter. “You’re using this stupid trip as an excuse to try and get back with me. You think throwing money at a vacation and putting us in the same space for a whole week is going to magically fix everything. It’s not going to work.”

For a moment, Robby just looked at you, his expression unreadable. Then that stupid smirk of his spread across his face again. “Have you seen me in swim trunks lately? I look real good. You might have to swallow your words when you see me.”

You let out an exasperated scoff, though you couldn’t stop the flush that crept up your neck. You hated the way he could still make you laugh when you were trying to be pissed. You hated the way your body still reacted to his words. “You’re impossible. Seriously, it’s impossible to have a serious conversation with you sometimes.”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, clearly enjoying himself. “Sun, sand, good drinks, me looking like this… you never know.”

“I’ll go,” you said, cutting him off before he could keep going. “But don’t even think this means anything else. We’ll get separate rooms. We’ll make separate plans. I’m going for Hannah. That’s it. Don’t get any ideas.”

Robby ignored your warning completely. “You look so gorgeous right now,” he murmured. Suddenly, his voice went quieter, more intimate. Robby moved his eyes slowly over your face, down to the collar of your shirt and back up again. “All soft and sleepy in bed like that. Fuck… I wish I were lying there with you.”

Your stomach flipped despite yourself, the way he said it, so sincere and full of a hunger that never ceased but only grew stronger every day, made heat bloom in your belly. You wanted to scream at how easily he could still do that to you. “Robby…” you warned him.

“I’m serious,” he continued. “I miss the way you feel under me. The way you breathe when you’re falling asleep next to me. I miss—”

“Goodbye, Robby.” You didn’t wait for him to finish, you ended the facetime call with a tap of your finger, plunging your screen into darkness. The room felt suddenly too quiet, too empty without his presence there. You dropped your phone onto the mattress beside you and stared up at the ceiling. Your skin felt warm, your mind was already replaying the way he’d looked at you, the tone of his voice when he said he wished he was lying there with you.

You pulled the blanket higher up to your chest, trying to ignore the storm of feelings Robby had just stirred up with nothing but his voice. It didn’t work, the ache was still there, as well as the flutter in your chest. The way your heart tripped over itself whenever he looked at you like that. Five years later, and Michael could still make your stupid heart race like you were that same fourth-year med student who used to sneak into his place late at night after shift. And now you had agreed to spend an entire week with him. A full week in Mexico. Seven days of Robby being Robby, charming, attentive, and far too good at reminding you exactly why you fell for him in the first place.

You had to force yourself to go back to one of the saddest days you could remember. Robby had come home from a brutal twelve-hour shift. You had just collapsed onto the couch after finally getting Hannah down, she’d been fussy all day, teething and crying restlessly. The moment he walked through the door, you could tell it had been a bad one. His eyes were glassy and distant, the lines on his face etched deeper than usual. Lately, every shift seemed to carve something out of him. He moved closer and pressed a quick, almost mechanical kiss to your forehead. No hello. No “how was your day.” Not even the ghost of a smile. Just autopilot, he was running on empty.

He sat on the edge of the kitchen counter, far from you, shoulders slumped. “There’s some pasta in the fridge I made,” you whispered, hoping it would reach him. He didn’t answer, didn’t even nod. He just stared at nothing, too drained to move.

Then Hannah let out a small cry from her crib. Before you could push yourself up, Robby was already on his feet. He scooped her up gently against his shoulder, swaying her in a soothing rhythm. “Are you okay, little angel?” he cooed softly, tender in a way it hadn’t been for you in weeks. “Yes, you’re okay. Yes, you are. Daddy’s here… shhh, go back to sleep.” That was the only moment you saw him smile genuine, and heartbreakingly soft as he held his daughter.

Tears burned in your eyes as you stood and walked closer to him. You had spent so many sleepless nights turning it over in your mind, and you couldn’t keep prolonging the inevitable. “Robby… we need to talk.”

“About us?” he replied, already sensing where this was going.

You nodded, feeling your throat tight. “Why do I get the feeling that you don’t want to be with me? That… you regret telling me to move in with you and being together?”

Robby sighed heavily, rubbing his temples like the weight of the world was pressing down on them. “It’s just work. You have no idea what it’s like trying to hold the whole fucking department together when everything is crumbling down and—”

“It’s not just that,” you cut him off. “You don’t look at me. You don’t talk to me. I understand your job is hard, that you’re stressed and exhausted, but… shit, Robby, all we do is ignore each other. The only time we actually speak is to argue about something stupid.” The tears slipped free then, there was no holding them back.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I thought I could do all of this, but I—” Tears welled in his eyes too, spilling over as he tried to hold it together. “I don’t know what to do. I—” A sob cut him off.

“Do you need space?” you asked, dreading the answer. “Is that it? You need us to take some time?”

He looked at you for a long moment, broken and defeated. “Yes.”

Two weeks had passed, and before you realized it, the suitcase lay now open on your bed, half-filled with the folded clothes you had carefully picked for the trip. You stood in front of it, folding another sundress, while Hannah sat cross-legged on the floor surrounded by her own small pink suitcase and a pile of toys.

“Hannah, baby, do you have everything?” you asked for what felt like the tenth time. “Swimsuits? Sunscreen? The colouring books Daddy bought you for the plane?”

Hannah nodded enthusiastically, holding up her favorite ruffled swimsuit. “Yes, Mommy! And my water wings and the new sunglasses Daddy got me!” She beamed with uncontainable excitement. “Are we leaving soon? Is Daddy almost here?”

“Any minute now,” you replied, zipping up the main compartment of your suitcase with a sigh. Your stomach had been in knots all morning, this trip still felt like a terrible idea the more you thought about it, but Hannah’s joy made it impossible to back out now.

Right on cue, there was a knock at the front door. Hannah shot up like a rocket and ran toward it, yelling “Daddy!” at the top of her lungs.

You followed more slowly, pulling both suitcases behind you. When you opened the door, Robby stood there in a casual white linen shirt and shorts, looking annoyingly relaxed and handsome in the morning sunlight. His eyes immediately found yours, a small playing on his lips. “Hey,” he said softly. “You two ready?”

“Daddy!” Hannah launched herself at him. Robby scooped her up effortlessly, kissing her cheek as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Hi, my little mermaid. You got all your stuff?” He glanced over her head at you. “Need help with the bags?"

“I’ve got them,” you said, a little more curtly than you intended. 

The drive to the airport was filled with Hannah’s nonstop chatter from the backseat. She pointed out every car, every cloud, every sign, asking a thousand questions about the plane, the ocean, and whether there would be dolphins. Robby answered every single one with patience, occasionally glancing at you in the passenger seat. You kept your eyes on the road, trying not to think too hard about how domestic this all felt. 

At the airport, Robby handled check-in, and when the agent handed over the boarding passes, you caught a glimpse of them and froze. Business class.

You turned to him slowly as they walked toward security. “Seriously, Robby? It’s a four-hour flight. We could’ve flown economy like normal people.”

He shrugged, a smirk tugging at his mouth. “I had miles on my card for an upgrade. Didn’t cost anything extra.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Robby.”

He leaned in slightly, keeping his voice low so Hannah wouldn’t hear. “Forgive me. I just wanted to spoil my family a little.”

“We’re not a family,” you said firmly, glancing ahead at Hannah skipping between you two. Robby didn’t argue, he just gave you a look that said he disagreed but wasn’t going to push. 

The flight itself was smoother than you expected. In business class, the seats were wide and comfortable. You both let Hannah had the window seat, ans she spent most of the flight pressed against the glass, watching the clouds and looking at the ocean. Robby sat in the middle, keeping Hannah entertained with the in-flight entertainment and snacks.

You tried to read, but your mind kept wandering, every time Robby’s arm brushed yours, reaching for something, or when he laughed at one of Hannah’s excited comments, memories flooded your mind back, and you had to constantly remind yourself the only reason you were doing this was because Hannah had asked.

You landed in Cancun four hours later. A private transfer waited for you outside arrivals. The driver loaded your bags while Hannah bounced between you and Robby, holding both your hands. The drive to the resort took about forty-five minutes along the coast. You watched the palm trees that lined the road and the turquoise water on one side. Hannah pressed her face to the window the entire time, gasping at every new sight.

When the resort finally came into view, it was even more beautiful than the pictures. A luxurious property with white buildings, infinity pools cascading toward the ocean, and tropical gardens everywhere. 

The humid air of Cancun wrapped around you the moment you stepped out of the transfer van. The resort lobby was stunning with high ceilings, white marble floors and massive floral arrangements. Hannah’s hand was firmly in yours, her fingers squeezing with excitement as her eyes darted everywhere at once. “Mommy, look! There’s a fountain! And flowers! And the ocean is right there!”

Robby walked a few steps ahead, carrying Hannah’s pink suitcase in one hand and his own duffel in the other. He looked completely at ease, the fabric of his shirt slightly damp from the humidity and clinging just enough to show the lines of his shoulders. He glanced back at you with a reassuring smile before heading straight to the reception desk. You stayed back with Hannah, letting her point out every detail she noticed.

A few minutes later, Robby returned, twirling a key card between his fingers. “All set. We’re in the beachfront wing. Follow me.”

The walk to the room was beautiful but felt endless. Hannah skipped between you and Robby, holding both your hands and swinging them as she chattered nonstop about building the biggest sandcastle in the world. 

Robby finally stopped in front of a beautiful wooden door, he swiped the key card, and the door clicked open. The suite was breathtaking, with floor-to-ceiling sliding glass doors that opened onto a wide private balcony overlooking the ocean. The living area had elegant white furniture, and as you stepped further inside, your eyes landed on the bedroom area with two queen-size beds.

You stopped dead in the doorway. “Where’s the other room?” you asked slowly, worried you already knew the answer Robby was about to give you.

Robby set the suitcases down and scratched the back of his head, looking mildly sheepish. “Yeah… so there was a mix-up at the front desk. We only got one room.”

You stared at him with disbelief. “What? Are you serious right now?” The asshole had to be kidding. But then again, this was Robby, and this was exactly the kind of shenanigans he’d put you through. You should have known he wouldn’t keep his promise to let you do your own thing at the resort, to not act like you were a real family on a family holiday. You had been to hopeful to expect he’d at least wait a little longer before showing his real intentions.

Hannah, completely oblivious to the tension, let out a delighted squeal and immediately launched herself onto the nearest bed, jumping up and down with pure joy. “This one’s mine! No, this one! Look how bouncy it is, Mommy! Daddy, come jump with me!”

You barely heard her, your whole attention was locked on Robby. The family suite was gorgeous, in tasteful neutral tones, with fresh flowers on the nightstands, a bottle of champagne and fruit plate waiting on the table with a welcome note, but none of that mattered. What mattered now was that Robby had not only manipulated you to agree to this trip, but he’d also lied to you.

“Michael, do you think I was born yesterday? You totally did this on purpose. I know it.” 

He held up both hands in a placating gesture, though the corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. “There was a confusion with the booking. I swear. They had us down for a family suite with two queens instead of two separate rooms.”

You crossed your arms, glaring at him. “Go fix it. Right now.”

“I already tried,” he said calmly, stepping closer so Hannah wouldn’t overhear. “They’re completely booked. Peak season, a big wedding happening this week. No other rooms available in the whole resort.”

You let out a frustrated breath, rubbing your temple. “This is not what I agreed to, Robby. Separate rooms. That was the condition. I never would’ve come if—”

“I know,” he interrupted gently. “But it’s just one week. I can take one bed, you and Hannah can take the other. It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine,” you hissed, keeping your voice down as Hannah continued bouncing happily, now unpacking her stuffed capybara and arranging it on the pillows. “This is exactly what I was worried about. You’re pushing boundaries.”

Meanwhile, Hannah had moved on to dragging her suitcase across the room, chattering excitedly. “Mommy, can we go to the beach now? The water is waiting! I want to find seashells and build a castle.”

Robby glanced at her with that fatherly smile that always made your chest ache, then looked back at you. “Look at her. She’s already so happy. One week, that’s all. We’re adults. We can handle sharing space for a few nights without it meaning anything.”

You stared at the two queen beds again. They were large, luxurious, with more pillows than necessary. The balcony doors were open, letting in the warm breeze and the constant, soothing sound of waves. It would have been perfect… if it weren’t for the man standing two feet away looking far too pleased with this “mix-up.”

Hannah suddenly ran over and grabbed your hand, then Robby’s. “Come on! Let’s go to the beach! I’m ready! I have my bucket and everything!”

You looked down at your daughter’s beaming face, then back at Robby. He raised an eyebrow slightly, waiting. You let out a long, defeated sigh. “Fine. But this changes nothing, Robby. Separate beds. No funny business. And the second a room opens up, we’re switching.”

“Whatever you say,” he replied, but the small, satisfied smile on his face told you he wasn’t worried at all.

He set his suitcase near one of the queen beds and nodded toward the bathroom. “I’ll go change first. Won’t be long.”

You nodded silently, still processing everything, but as soon as the bathroom door clicked shut behind him, you turned your attention to Hannah, who was already pulling things out of her pink suitcase with frantic excitement.

“Come here, baby,” you said softly, kneeling on the floor beside her bed. “Let’s get you ready for the beach.”

Hannah stood in front of you, wiggling with impatience as you helped her out of her travel clothes. You carefully slipped her into her favorite ruffled swimsuit, bright pink with little white flowers, adjusting the straps and smoothing the fabric over her tummy. Then came the sunscreen. You squeezed a generous amount into your palm and rubbed it slowly over her arms, shoulders, back, legs, and face, making sure every inch was covred. Hannah giggled when you got to her nose, squirming because of how tickly it was.

“You have to stay safe from the sun, okay?” you murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “We’re going to have so much fun, but Mommy doesn’t want you to get burned like a toast.”

“I won’t!” she promised solemnly, then immediately went back to bouncing on her toes. “Can I wear my new sunglasses? And my hat with the flowers?”

The bathroom door opened, and Robby stepped out, for a moment, time seemed to slow. He wore dark swim trunks, paired with a simple white shirt that he hadn’t bothered to put on yet,  it was slung over his shoulder. You had seen his bare body no more than a month ago, you’d been under it, but it still felt, somehow, like seeing him again for the first time.

You stared at him longer than you should have. His soft but solid tummy that drove you insane, and that familiar trail of dark hair across his chest that you had always, always loved running your fingers through.

Your eyes traced the lines of his chest, the way the hair curled slightly, the soft give of his stomach. Heat flushed up your neck because God, you still loved every inch of him. 

Robby caught you looking and a knowing smile spread across his face. “What?” he asked teasingly. “I got something on my face?”

You blinked hard, tearing your gaze away. “No,” you muttered, grabbing your own beach bag a little too quickly. “I’m… going to change.”

You escaped into the bathroom, closing the door firmly behind you. The mirror showed your flushed cheeks, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. This was just a week, you could handle this. Just a week of sleeping in the same room, just a week of seeing his body, just a week of him deliberately trying to break down our walls.

You changed into one of the bikinis you’d packed, a simple black two-piece that tied at the sides and back. You liked how it looked on you, it was flattering, but as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you felt suddenly, acutely aware of how little it covered. Your body had changed since having Hannah, a few stretch marks here and there, breasts that were fuller but not as perky as before. Standing here in just this tiny bikini, knowing Robby was right outside… it felt vulnerable.

You adjusted the ties one more time, took another steadying breath, and stepped out of the bathroom. Hannah immediately squealed. “Mommy, you look so pretty!” She ran over and hugged your legs before darting into the bathroom herself to grab her sunglasses and sun hat. “I’ll be right back!”

You stood in the middle of the suite, adjusting the strap of your beach bag, when Robby stepped in from the balcony. He had been leaning on the railing, looking out at the ocean, but the moment he turned and saw you, he stopped dead. His eyes widened, and he dramatically clutched his chest with one hand, staggering back a step like he was having a heart attack.

 “Jesus Christ,” he breathed, the grin on his face pure mischief. “Warn a guy next time.”

You rolled your eyes, fighting the smile that wanted to break free. “You’re so not funny, Robinavitch.”

You wanted to slap that smug smile right off his face and kiss him senseless at the same time. The two urges warred inside you, because you hated how much his words mattered. How easily he could make you feel like the most beautiful woman who had ever stepped foot on this earth, and how completely you believed him when he said it. He wasn’t just mumbling the words because it felt like something he was supposed to say. No, Robby looked at you like he truly wanted you, like he was dying to get his hands back on your body, to pull you close and remind you exactly how good it used to feel. His gaze lingered, tracing over you in a way that made heat flood your stomach. God, you hated how much you still wanted him to.

He didn’t stop. He kept one hand pressed to his heart, shaking his head slowly as his gaze traveled over you, unashamed, appreciative, and far too warm. “You’re trying to kill me on day one, huh? That bikini… fuck. You look incredible.”

Heat flooded your face again, but you crossed your arms over your chest, suddenly self-conscious. “Stop it. This is exactly what I was worried about.”

Robby took a slow step closer, still smiling, but his voice dropped. “Can’t help it. You’ve always looked good, but seeing you like this…” He let the sentence trail off, his sight lingering on the curve of your waist and the ties at your hips.

Before you could respond, Hannah burst back out of the bathroom wearing her oversized sunglasses and floppy sun hat, striking a dramatic pose. “I’m ready! Let’s go see the ocean!”

The sand was warm under your feet as the three of you made your way down the wooden boardwalk to the private stretch of beach reserved for resort guests. The sea stretched out in front of you, waves lapping against the shore, leaving behind lines of foam. Hannah’s excitement was infectious. She ran ahead a few steps, then back to you and Robby, her little sun hat flopping with every bounce. “The water is so blue! Can we go in right now? Please?”

Robby chuckled, adjusting the beach bag on his shoulder. “Let’s set up first, kiddo. Then we’ll swim.”

You chose three loungers under a large thatched umbrella near the water’s edge. You spread out towels while Robby helped Hannah with her water wings. The resort staff had placed a small cooler with chilled water and fruit beside the chairs, and soft music drifted from speakers along the beach. 

Once everything was settled, Robby stood and offered his hand to Hannah. “Ready, little mermaid?” 

She grabbed his hand with both of hers and tugged him toward the water. You watched them go, settling back into your lounger with the book you’d brought.  The sun felt incredible on your skin, you opened your book, but your eyes kept drifting over the top of the pages. Robby and Hannah waded into the shallow waves. Hannah squealed every time the water touched her legs, clinging to Robby’s hand. He lifted her high when a bigger wave came, spinning her around as she laughed uncontrollably. His swim trunks moved lower on his hips, and it made it impossible for you to focus on your book, every few minutes your gaze wandered back to them. 

After nearly an hour, Hannah came running back to you, dripping wet and beaming. “Mommy! Come build sandcastles with me! Daddy said he’ll watch our stuff.”

You set your book aside and took her hand, walking down to the firmer sand near the waterline. The two of you knelt together, digging with plastic shovels and buckets. Hannah chattered nonstop about her castle needing a moat and a tower for the princess. You helped her pat the walls smooth, adding seashells and bits of coral you found along the shore. The sun warmed your back, and for a while, everything felt simple and perfect,  just you and your daughter creating something together. But you felt Robby’s eyes on you the entire time, when you glanced up, he was sitting on the lounger, with his elbows on his knees, watching with an unreadable expression. 

He didn’t look away when your eyes met, the intensity in his gaze made heat bloom across your skin. Later, when the castle was tall and elaborate, Hannah got a mischievous glint in her eye. “Can we bury Daddy in the sand? Like a mummy?”

Robby, who had joined you, raised an eyebrow. “Oh, I see how it is. Ganging up on me already?”

You smiled despite yourself. “Sounds fair.”

The three of you worked together, slowly covering Robby as he lay back in the sand. Hannah patted sand over his legs with delight, while you worked on his arms and torso. The heavy sand molded around his body as he lay there patiently, occasionally joking with Hannah about becoming a “sand mummy.” Every time your hands brushed his skin while smoothing the sand, a spark jumped between you. He noticed, and you knew he did.

When you finally stepped back, Robby was almost completely buried, only his head and part of his neck visible. Hannah clapped her hands and danced around him. “He looks like a turtle!”

Robby chuckled, trying to move and finding himself well and truly stuck. “Alright, ladies. Fun’s over. Unbury me.”

You exchanged a look with Hannah, a smile spreading across your face. “You know what, Hannah? Don’t you want to go get some ice cream? I saw a stand right by the pools, and since this is all-inclusive, we can have all the ice cream we want.”

Hannah’s eyes lit up like stars. “Yes! Chocolate and strawberry and rainbow sprinkles!”

Robby snapped his head toward you, as much as he could with what little mobility he had left. “Ice cream sounds great. Why don’t you get me out of here and we go there together?”

You crouched down beside him, close enough that your shadow fell over his face. You leaned in until your faces were only inches apart. “This is for booking one room, Michael.”

His eyes widened with outrage. “You wouldn’t—”

You straightened up before he could finish, taking Hannah’s hand. “Come on, baby. Let’s go find that ice cream. Daddy can wait a few more minutes.”

Hannah giggled conspiratorially and waved at Robby. “Bye, Daddy! We’ll bring you some… maybe!”

As the two of you walked away hand-in-hand toward the resort path, Robby’s voice followed you, half-laughing, half-protesting. “This is unfair punishment! Hannah! Come back!”

You didn’t look back, but you couldn’t stop the satisfied smile on your face. For the first time since arriving, you felt like you might actually survive this week, but only if you kept winning the small battles.

The light of late afternoon had softened into the warm pinks and oranges by the time you and Hannah returned to the suite. The scent of ocean salt that clung to your skin and your hair was a wild mess. You both needed showers badly. You helped Hannah first, rinsing the sand from her hair and body. After drying her with one of the oversized white towels, you slipped her into her favorite purple dress and brushed her hair until it was smooth. Your turn came next, you took your time, letting the warm water wash away the salt, sand, and sunscreen. When you emerged wrapped in a towel, Hannah was sitting on one of the queen beds, flipping through a children’s book the resort had left. 

She looked up with a bright smile. “Mommy, I’m so hungry! Can we go eat now?”

“Soon, baby. Let’s wait and see if Daddy gets back so we can all go together.”

You were both dressed and ready when the door to the suite finally opened. Robby stepped inside, still covered head to toe in sand. It clung to his hair, dusted his shoulders and arms, and left visible trails down his legs. His swim trunks looked gritty, and there was sand stuck to the damp skin of his chest and stomach. He looked equal parts ridiculous and defeated. You and Hannah stared for half a second before bursting into laughter. 

Hannah pointed, doubling over on the bed. “Daddy! You’re a sand monster for real!”

Robby closed the door behind him with a dramatic sigh, brushing uselessly at his arms. “It’s not funny,” he grumbled, though the corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. “That wasn’t cool at all.”

You tried to stifle your laughter, covering your mouth with one hand. “You deserved that, Michael.”

He shot you a look, narrowing his eyes playfully. “I have sand in places no person should ever have sand. I’m talking places, okay? You left me there all afernoon.”

You raised an eyebrow, still smiling. “Really? The whole afternoon?”

He ran a hand through his hair, sending another shower of sand onto the floor. “Maybe a beach guard eventually helped dig me out. That’s not the point. The point is you two left me there.”

Hannah was still giggling uncontrollably. “Sorry, Daddy. I ate all the ice-cream.”

Robby shook his head, trying to look stern but failing miserably. “Traitors, both of you.” He glanced down at himself again and sighed. “I need a shower. Give me ten minutes and we can head to dinner.”

While Robby disappeared into the bathroom, you and Hannah sat on the edge of the bed, listening to the water run. When Robby finally emerged, he looked refreshed, wearing a clean button-down shirt and shorts. “Ready?” he asked, offering Hannah his hand.

The buffet was everything a resort like this promised, long tables overflowing with fresh seafood, grilled meats, salads, tropical fruits, and many dessert stations. Hannah’s eyes were wide as saucers as she piled her plate high with pasta, shrimp, and fruit, while you and Robby chose more balanced meals. 

You ate slowly, savoring the flavors while Hannah chattered between bites about everything she’d seen that day, occasionally yawning as the long day caught up with her.

After dinner, the walk back to the suite was peaceful, the pathways were lit with lanterns, and the sound of waves grew louder again as you approached the beach wing. Hannah walked between you and Robby, holding both your hands, her steps slowing with tiredness.

Back in the room, the bedtime routine felt strangely intimate. You helped Hannah brush her teeth while Robby turned down the beds. Hannah chose to sleep with you tonight. You tucked her in on the bed closest to the balcony, reading her a short story while Robby dimmed the lights.

Soon, Hannah’s breathing evened out into sleep, her body curled against your side. You lay there in the semi-darkness while Robby settled into the other bed, the sheets rustling as he got comfortable.

“Well, isn’t this nice?” Robby murmured, soft enough not to disturb Hannah’s peaceful sleep. “The three of us here like this… I had a great time today. Even if I spent three hours buried under sand.”

You closed your eyes, trying to ignore the way your treacherous heart agreed with him. It did feel nice, dangerously nice. You’d had so much fun being with him, doing things together like a regular family: building sandcastles, chasing waves, watching Hannah’s delighted squeals. For a few stolen hours, it had felt real. “Tomorrow morning,” you said quietly, despite the ache in your chest, “you’re going to the reception and asking if they have any more rooms available.”

The next morning you woke slowly, Hannah was still curled against your side on the queen bed. Carefully, so as not to wake her, you slipped out of bed. You moved quietly around the room, brushing your teeth, splashing cool water on your face, and running a brush through your hair. You chose a red bikini today, tied the strings and slipped on a light white cover-up. Before leaving, you scribbled a short note and left it on the nightstand: Went for an early walk on the beach to watch the sunrise.

Robby woke later, he spotted the note immediately and read it with a smile. “Mommy went for an early beach walk,” he told Hannah, helping her sit up. “Let’s get ready and surprise her with breakfast on the beach. What do you think?”

Hannah’s face lit up. They took their time, Robby patiently helping her brush her teeth and wash her face. He changed into swim trunks and a loose linen shirt, applied sunscreen to Hannah’s face and arms, and they headed out hand-in-hand, making a quick stop at the breakfast buffet to grab some fresh fruit, croissants, yogurt, and cold water bottles to bring to the beach.

The ocean sparkled brilliantly as he scanned the loungers, looking for you. When he finally spotted you further down the beach, his steps slowed. You were standing near the water’s edge in just the red bikini, the morning light highlighting every curve of your body. You looked relaxed, confident, and breathtakingly beautiful. And you weren’t alone. A tall, ripped guy in his mid-to-late twenties stood close to you, shirtless, his sculpted abs and broad shoulders glistening slightly with sweat or water. He was laughing at something you said, leaning in with confidence, clearly flirting back with you. 

He looked like he belonged on a fitness magazine cover, young, with zero signs of the wear that came from decades of work. An ugly twist of jealousy hit Robby in the chest. But it wasn’t just jealousy, it was insecurity hiding right behind it. This guy was younger, fitter. Probably had endless stamina and no emotional baggage. Robby became acutely aware of his own softer stomach, the gray hairs scattered across his chest, and the wrinkles around his eyes from years of exhaustion. He felt every one of his fifty. years in that moment, standing there holding a plate of fruit and his daughter’s hand.

Hannah tugged excitedly on Robby’s hand. “There’s Mommy! Look, Daddy! She’s over there by the water. Can we go say hi? Please?”

Robby forced a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah, angel. Let’s go.”

They started walking across the warm sand. Robby’s focus narrowed entirely on you and the man standing far too close. As they approached, he heard the guy’s easy laugh again. The young man was animated, gesturing toward the horizon with one muscular arm, clearly in the middle of some charming story. 

“Good morning” Robby said, trying not to sound bothered but doing a terrible job hiding his annoyance. “I see you found company.”

The guy’s gaze flicked from you to Robby, then back to you with mild confusion. “Is that… your father?”

The word landed like a punch, and Robby let out a short and dry laugh, though his jaw tightened painfully. “Her father,” he mumbled on the low. “Cute. No. I’m her husband, as a matter of fact.” His voice didn’t even hesitate over the blatant lie he’d just said.

You laughed, an uncomfortable and forced sound that made Robby’s chest twist. “He’s not my husband,” you corrected quickly. “He’s just… a guy I know from work.”

Robby turned to you slowly, raising one eyebrow raised in disbelief. “A guy you know from work? Excuse me?” The young guy shifted awkwardly on his feet, clearly sensing the sudden thick tension crackling in the air. “I’m the father of her daughter. Michael Robinavitch, nice to meet you.”

The guy’s eyes darted between the three of you, with a confused look across his face as if he couldn’t quite process the sudden shift. Just a couple of minutes earlier he’d been leaning in close, flashing an easy smile and flirting with acute woman at the beach. Now here you were with a man standing possessively close and a little kid next to him. And as if he couldn’t quite believe that Robby, was somehow the father of that kid. “So… you have a daughter? With her?”

Robby kept his tone light for Hannah’s sake, ruffling her hair gently with one hand, but there was an edge underneath his words. “Yes. I got her pregnant. It was a wonderful experience, actually.”

The words came out with a possessive undertone he didn’t even try to hide. What a fucking little prick, Robby thought. He wishes he could pull a woman like you. Sure, the guy might have abs where Robby had a softer belly. Maybe his forehead was smooth, with no lines etched from the pass of time, and his head might still be free of silver hairs. But Robby had pulled you without any of that polished bullshit, and you had always looked at him like he was the most handsome man to ever exist. A little asshole like him wouldn’t have a clue what to do with a woman like you.

You shot Robby a warning glare, a mix of anger and embarrassment. because now you had to explain your awkard family situation to this stranger. “It’s… complicated,” you told the guy, forcing a polite smile that felt brittle on your face. “Really complicated.”

The young man rubbed the back of his neck, his sculpted shoulders tensing visibly. He was clearly uncomfortable now, the easy flirtation from moments ago evaporating. “Yeah… uhh, I think my friends are calling me. Nice to meet you, though.” He gave you one last lingering, appreciative glance before turning and walking away toward a group of guys further down the beach.

The second he was out of earshot, you rounded on Robby, trying to keep your voice low and controlled so Hannah wouldn’t hear, but still with a furious undertone in it. “What the hell was that? You completely ruined it. He was flirting with me, and you had to march over here acting like some possessive caveman. And “her husband” What the hell was that?”

Robby set the beach bag down on the sand a little harder than necessary. “Oh please,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest, the movement highlighting the soft give of his stomach beneath his shirt. “He’s not even your type.”

You stared at him incredulously. “And how exactly would you know what my type is these days, Robby?”

He shrugged, but his eyes were dark with a potent mix of jealousy and insecurity. “Because I know you. That guy? All looks and no substance. Perfect abs and zero idea what real life looks like. You’d be bored in ten minutes.”

The words hung between you. Hannah, sensing the growing tension like children always do, tugged gently on your hand. “Mommy, can we eat breakfast now? I’m hungry.”

You forced a warm smile for her, pushing down the frustration and smoothing her messy brown hair with your fingers. “Of course, sweetheart. Let’s sit down and eat. Daddy brought all your favorites.”

The rest of the morning on the beach passed in silence from your side. You didn’t speak one more word to Robby. Every time he tried to make conversation,offering you some mango, commenting on how beautiful the water looked, asking if you wanted more sunscreen, you answered with short nods or turned your attention to Hannah instead. Robby noticed, and after a while, he stood up slowly, brushing sand from his legs.

“I’m gonna take a walk around the resort for a bit. Give you some space.” He looked at Hannah with a soft smile. “You stay with Mommy, okay, angel? I’ll be back soon.”

Hannah nodded, already busy building another small tower on her sandcastle. Robby lingered for a second longer, resting his eyes on you with something regretful in them, before he turned and walked away down the beach path. You watched his back until he disappeared behind the palm trees.

The hours passed slowly, you played with Hannah in the shallow water, built more sandcastles, applied more sunscreen, and read a few chapters of your book while she napped under the umbrella. But your mind kept replaying the scene with the guy, Robby’s jealous interruption, his possessive words, the way he’d looked at you. It stirred up too many old feelings you didn’t want to examine.

 Part of you enjoyed the attention he gave you, the way Robby got possessive whenever another guy even stepped too close. It felt good to be wanted like that. To see him look at you like he still wanted you to be his and his only, even after all this time, even after everything that had happened between you. It was dangerous, how much you liked it. Because it stirred up the same old feelings, the ones that made it so hard to remember why you kept pushing him away in the first place.

Robby returned a couple of hours later, carrying two fresh iced drinks. He approached cautiously and sat down on the edge of your lounger, close but not touching you. “I know you’re pissed,” he said. “And you have every right to be. I overstepped. I was an asshole back there. Jealous and… yeah. I’m sorry.”

You stayed silent for a long moment, staring out at the turquoise water. “You were. You ruined a nice, harmless conversation.”

Robby nodded, accepting it. “I did.” He paused, then offered one of the iced drinks. “I walked by the spa earlier. They have really good reviews. I thought of getting you a massage as an apology. You deserve to relax after everything… and after dealing with me being an idiot.”

You looked at him then, searching his face. His expression was sincere, the usual cocky edge softened by genuine regret. Part of you wanted to stay mad. The other part, the tired nd overworked resident and mother, desperately wanted that massage. “…Fine,” you said eventually. “But this doesn’t mean I’m not still annoyed.”

“Understood.” He gave you a small smile.

You left Hannah at the resort’s supervised children’s activity center, a beautiful shaded area with crafts, games, and attentive staff. She was thrilled to join the other kids, waving goodbye without a second thought. 

The spa building was serene and even more luxurious than the rest of the resort. Robby stepped up to the elegant reception desk first. You watched him leaning slightly on the polished wood counter, and the woman on the desk checking the screen and nodding. 

After a couple of seconds, Robby came back to you. “Okay, it’s all settled. I’m gonna head back, maybe hit the pool with the bar. Enjoy your massage. You deserve it.”

Before Robby had any time to head to the door, a masseuse in a white uniform approached you both. She offered a welcoming smile. “Okay, beautiful couple, ready for your couple’s massage? We have the ocean-view room prepared with the full aromatherapy package you selected. It’s one of our most popular experiences.”

You froze right there and then, the word “couple” hitting you like cold water. Your stomach tightened instantly, a rush of irritation flooding through you. “Robby,” you said, turning to him. “What the hell did you do now?”

He looked genuinely surprised, his eyes widening as he raised both hands in a surrender gesture. “I swear I don’t know,” he said quickly, sounding sincere for once. “I just booked a regular massage for you. I didn’t say anything about a couple’s anything. I was very clear, one person, one massage.”

The masseuse glanced between the two of you, still smiling politely, completely unfazed by the sudden tension. “It’s our signature couples experience, side-by-side tables, synchronized massage, and a glass of champagne afterward. Very romantic and relaxing. Perfect for reconnecting.”

Before you could refuse, clarify, or even form a full protest, the staff were already guiding you both forward with efficiency. They led you down a quiet, incense-scented hallway that opened into a treatment room. Two massage tables stood side by side in the center, candles flickering all around the room and towels folded neatly.

Your heart was racing now, a mix of irritation at Robby and anticipation because soon he would be shirtless again, lying only a few feet away while you were both having a “couple experience” when all you needed was to be as far away as possible from the concept of you and Robby being a couple. Your brain was already getting all these confused, dangerous feelings after spending so much time together, the laughter, the casual touches, the way the three of you looked like a real family from the outside. The last thing you needed right now was to keep doing couple activities. Every shared dinner, every walk along the beach, only made the line between co-parents. You were supposed to be keeping your distance.

You turned to him. “This is not what I agreed to, Robby.”

He looked almost sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. “I really did just ask for one massage. But… we’re here now. Might as well enjoy it?”

The masseuses were already moving, preparing the oils, laying out fresh towels, adjusting the temperature and lighting.

On of them smiled gently. “If you’d both like to remove your clothes to your comfort level and lie face down on the tables, we’ll begin with the back and shoulders. Take your time.”

Robby glanced at you, reading the hesitation in your posture. He gave a reassuring nod. “I’ll go first,” he said quietly, and stepped behind the simple privacy screen they had provided. 

You heard the rustle of fabric as he removed his shirt and trunks. You turned around quickly, facing the wall to avoid the sight of his fully naked body, one you knew far too well and that still had the exact same devastating effect on you. Definitely not the kind of reaction you needed when you were supposed to be relaxing. But even with your back to him, the knowledge that he was right there in the same room, completely bare, got your heart beating fast. 

When he emerged and lay face down on the right-hand table, he draped the sheet modestly over his lower half. You couldn’t help but notice the familiar lines of his back, his strong shoulders, the soft curve where his waist met his hips. Your turn came next, you stepped behind the screen, your fingers slightly unsteady as you untied the bikini top and stepped out of the bottoms. The cool air kissed your bare skin, you wrapped yourself quickly in one of the large, warmed towels and moved to the left table, lying face down.

You turned your head to the side, away from Robby, trying to steady your breathing. The masseuses worked in sync. Pouring warm oil first, spreading it with their fingers, starting at your shoulders and working downward in long strokes. The pressure was perfect — deep enough to melt the knots from endless shifts, gentle enough to feel indulgent. Beside you, Robby let out a low sound of relief as his own masseuse began. The sound sent an unwelcome shiver down your spine, you knew that voice too well, one you’d heard far too many times.

One of the masseuses, an older woman, spoke softly as she worked on your upper back. “You two make a lovely couple. Have you been together a long time?”

Robby answered before you could explain how you weren’t a couple, you two had ended here after a complicated series of events. “Five years.”

You opened your eyes, staring at the white sheet beneath you. “We’re not really together,” you corrected quietly, the words slipping out before you could stop them. 

Robby let out a soft chuckle from the next table. “It’s more like an on-and-off thing.”

You turned your head slightly toward him, the irritation mixing with the pleasure of the massage, an experience that was supposed to be relaxing, but now was irritating due to Robby’s presence. “It’s mostly off than on, really.”

The younger masseuse working on Robby smiled as she kneaded his shoulders. “Ah, but you are here together now. That counts for something, no?”

The older woman on your side pressed deeper into a knot between your shoulder blades, drawing a quiet sigh from you. “You make a good couple,” she said warmly. “I have seen many couples working here, but not many where the man looks at the woman the way he looks at you. It’s very special.”

You let out a small, skeptical laugh, the sound muffled against the face cradle. “I find that hard to believe.”

Robby’s voice came from beside you. “I look at her like she’s the second most precious thing in this entire world.”

The masseuses both made soft. The younger one asked curiously, “Why second?”

Robby didn’t hesitate. “Becuse the first one is the daughter she gave me five years ago.”

A soft chorus of “Awww” filled the room. You could practically feel the women melting at his words. The older masseuse patted your shoulder gently. “That is beautiful. A man who knows what he has.”

You felt heat rise in your cheeks, a confusing mix of embarrassment, irritation, and something warmer that his words always managed to make you feel. “He’s a flatterer,” you muttered, trying to keep your voice light. “Don’t let him fool you. He’s very good at saying the right things.”

Robby chuckled again. “Only when it’s true.”

The synchronized rhythm of the massage created an oddly intimate atmosphere. When your masseuse dug into a tight knot between your shoulder blades, Robby’s masseuse did the same at the exact same moment. The sensation of feeling your own body release tension while hearing his quiet groans of pleasure made the room feel smaller, more charged. Time stretched. You found yourself relaxing despite everything, the ocean view, the scent of the oils, the pressure, until the masseuse gently asked you to turn over. You hesitated for a second before complying, keeping the sheet carefully draped over your chest as you rolled onto your back. Robby turned at the same moment, and for a brief second, your eyes met across the small space between the tables. His gaze was dark, but you looked away quickly, focusing on the ceiling and the glow of the candles.

The front massage was somehow even more intimate, oil poured across your collarbones, your arms, your legs. The masseuse’s hands worked slowly up your thighs, careful and professional, but the proximity of Robby, who was lying there with his eyes sometimes closed, sometimes open and watching the ceiling, made every touch feel amplified. 

The older masseuse spoke again softly as she massaged your temples. “It is good to see a family taking time together. These moments are precious.”

You stayed silent this time, and Robby’s quiet reply came a moment later. “They are. It took me a while to realize there’s nothing more important than my family.”

When the massage ended, the masseuses quietly stepped out, leaving you and Robby alone in the treatment room. Robes had been provided, and two elegant flutes of champagne with fresh strawberries and raspberries waited on a small table between the two massage tables. You sat up slowly, wrapping the white robe tightly around yourself. Robby did the same on his table, the robe hanging open just enough to show his chest.

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the only sounds were the distant waves. Robby reached for the champagne glasses and handed one to you. He clinked his glass gently against yours.

“To surviving the rest of this trip,” he said softly, a smile playing on his lips.

Robby leaned back against the edge of his table, watching you. The robe slipped slightly off one shoulder, revealing more of his chest. “No matter how much you try to pretend you hate spending time with me… I know you secretly enjoy it. We get along. We have fun together. You know there’s this… connection between us.”

You stared into your glass, watching the bubbles rise. You took a sip before answering. “You’re wrong. The only reason we keep spending time together is because you pull this shit all the time. This wasn’t what I agreed to. I asked for separate rooms, no couple activities. You keep lying to me and manipulating everything because you have this fantasy that I’ll magically get back with you just because you paid for some expensive vacation.”

Robby set his glass down slowly. He didn’t look defensive. Instead, his expression was open, almost vulnerable. “I didn’t get a couple’s massage. I swear. I asked for one massage for you.”

You raised an eyebrow, the champagne making your cheeks feel warmer. “What about the hotel room mix-up?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, a sheepish smile tugging at his mouth. “Maybe… I didn’t correct the receptionist when he gave me only one room.”

You let out a disbelieving laugh, shaking your head. “You’re unbelievable.”

Robby looked at you then. “I’m in love,” he said simply. “Crazy in love with you. And every single day, every second I spend with you it just gets bigger and bigger. I can’t help it.”

The confession hung between you. You wanted to push back, to stay angry, but the massage had stripped away too many defenses. You knew you could pack your suitcase right now. You knew you could call a taxi, get to the airport, and buy the fastest ticket back home. But part of you didn’t. Part of you longed to stay and see what the next thing Robby would do, how far he’d go to win you back, how much he was willing to risk this time, and whether he truly meant it. The worst part of it all was how little you actually wanted to run away from him.

“You can’t deny the massage was nice,” Robby added quietly.

You took another slow sip of champagne. The truth slipped out before you could stop it. “It felt good,” you admitted, barely above a whisper. “Really good.”

The next day you woke to Hannah’s excited bouncing on the bed and Robby’s chuckle from the other side of the room. After a leisurely breakfast on the balcony while watching the ocean, the three of you headed to the resort’s massive water park, full of slides, lazy rivers, and splash zones. Hannah’s eyes were wide with wonder as she ran from one attraction to the next.

You spent hours in the shallow kids’ area first, where sprays of water misted over mushroom fountains. Hannah laughed uncontrollably as she darted through the sprays. Robby lifted her onto his shoulders so she could reach higher sprays, both of them soaked and beaming.

Later, you moved to the lazy river, the three of you floated together on a large raft, the current carrying you under bridges and past waterfalls. Hannah sat between you and Robby, chattering nonstop about the “big slides” she wanted to try next. Robby’s arm rested casually behind you on the raft, occasionally brushing his fingers over your shoulder. 

You braved a few bigger slides with Hannah while Robby waited at the bottom with open arms to catch her. He went down the steeper ones with her, their laughter echoing as they shot out into the splash pool. You watched from the side, smiling despite yourself at how good he was with her, patient and playful.

By late afternoon, you were all tired, but still decided to head to the open-air resort theater for the karaoke night. The tables were arranged in an arc around a central stage. You sat at a table near the front with Hannah comfortably settled on your lap. She wore her favorite sundress, her hair still slightly damp from the evening shower. In her small hands, she held a colorful fruity mocktail with a paper umbrella and a slice of pineapple on the rim. She watched performer after performer take the stage, clapping enthusiastically for every single one, whether they were hilariously off-key or surprisingly talented.

Robby sat right beside you, he had switched to margaritas after dinner and was now on his third or fourth. His cheeks were flushed a warm pink, and his smile came easier, the alcohol had softened the edges that usually existed between you, but you kept your guard firmly in place, hyper-aware of the weight of his arm behind you and the occasional brush of his fingers against your shoulder

The host, a charismatic man stepped up to the microphone scanning the crowd. “Alright, folks, next up we have Michael Robinavitch! Michael, the stage is all yours.”

Your stomach dropped instantly. You froze, asking yourself if you’d heard right, because karaoke was something Robby would never, ever, do. But then again, this wasn’t normal Robby, this was Robby after four margaritas that inhibited any level of self-awareness he had. “Robby… where are you going? What are you doing?”

He stood up with a bright, slightly tipsy smile that lit up his whole face. He leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to the top of Hannah’s head, then straightened. “You’ll see,” he said.

He walked toward the stage with confidence, the stage lights catching on the slight sway in his step from the margaritas. The crowd quieted with anticipation as he took the microphone. For a moment, he just stood there, looking out over the audience, until his eyes found yours across the tables. A heart-stopping smile spread across his face.

“Good evening, everyone,” he began. “My name is Michael Robinavitch.” He scanned the audience again until his gaze locked directly on you. “This song goes out to the love of my life.” He pointed straight at you, and heads turned. Dozens of eyes shifted your way all at once. Heat flooded your face in an instant, a deep and mortifying warmth that burned from your chest all the way to your ears. 

You wanted the sand beneath the theater to open up and swallow you whole. You sank lower in your seat, wishing you could disappear. Robby didn’t stop. “No, not only the love of my life. She’s the woman of my life. She’s the mother of my child. Look at them, aren’t they the most beautiful ladies in the world?”

The crowd let out a collective and heartfelt “Awww.” Some people clapped, a few whistled. Hannah waved happily at her dad from your lap, completely thrilled and oblivious to your embarrassment. “Daddy’s singing for us, Mommy!” she whispered excitedly, bouncing a little.

The opening notes of Aerosmith’s I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing began playing, and Robby’s voice came through the speakers, rough around the edges from the margaritas, but surprisingly in tune despite being a terrible singer. He sang directly to you, keeping his eyes locked on yours the entire time, as if no one else existed.

“I could stay awake just to hear you breathing

Watch you smile while you are sleeping

While you’re far away and dreaming…”

Embarrassment burned through every inch of you. Your cheeks were on fire, and you covered your face with one hand, peeking through your fingers. 

“I could spend my life in this sweet surrender

I could stay lost in this moment forever

Where a moment spent with you is a moment I treasure…”

Hannah bounced happily on your lap, clapping along. “Daddy sounds so good! He’s singing for you, Mommy!”

Robby poured everything into the chorus, his voice rising with emotion, and cracking slightly on the high notes but full of feeling.

“Don't wanna close my eyes

I don't wanna to fall asleep

'Cause I'd miss you baby

And I don't wanna miss a thing…”

He pointed at you and Hannah again during the song, his gaze never wavering. The crowd was completely swept up, some singing along, others watching the three of you with fond, smiling faces. You felt painfully exposed, seen in a way that terrified you, and yet terrifyingly wanted and loved in front of all these strangers. 

When the final notes faded, the audience erupted in loud applause and cheers. He gave a small, humble bow, grinning widely. He didn’t step off the stage immediately, instead, he raised the microphone again. “Thank you,” he said, smiling at the crowd. “I just want to say one more thing before I go. I was an idiot. I did some things I regret. I let fear and work, and my own stubbornness get in the way of the best things in my life.” He looked straight at you. “But this woman right here… and our beautiful daughter… they are the best thing that ever happened to me. All I want is another chance to fix it. To do it right this time.”

The crowd reacted instantly, followed by scattered cheers and shouts of encouragement. Someone near the back yelled, “Give the man another chance!” More voices joined in, “Yeah, go for it!” until it became a playful chant rippling across the theater. 

Robby finally stepped off the stage, making his way back to your table amid the lingering applause. Hannah launched herself into his arms the moment he sat down. “Daddy! You sang so good for Mommy!”

You stared at him, your heart still racing from the public love declaration and the serenade. You leaned in close so only he could hear. “You’re an idiot, Robby.”

He turned to you, so close that the scent of tequila and his cologne wrapped around you again. “Yeah. But I’m your idiot.” 

You wanted to push him away, to stay angry about the public spectacle and the way he kept blurring every boundary. But with Hannah happily chattering between you two about how “Daddy is the best singer ever,” and the crowd still occasionally glancing your way with fond smiles, it was impossible to ignore the pull.

 “Every single word was true.” He brushed your shoulder gently. “I lost so many years, so much time, so many memories I let go because of how I felt, and now the thought of missing one single moment with you kills me. I don’t want to be anywhere you’re not.”

You had to blink back the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. For the first time, you believed every single word that left his lips, no doubting, no second-guessing, no walls left to hide behind. After days of fighting him, of pushing back against every word and lingering touch, all you wanted was to pull him close, to bury your face in his chest and tell him you wanted the same thing. That every second you’d wasted fighting him was a second the two of you could have been together, laughing, touching. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow,” you swallowed. “When you’re not four margaritas in.”

The next morning, you woke before Hannah. You glanced at Robby in the other queen bed. He was still asleep, lying on his back with one arm draped over his stomach, the sheet low on his hips. You moved quietly and sat on the edge of his bed, the mattress dipping slightly under your weight. For a long moment you just watched him, the morning light highlighting the white hair on his jaw and the lines around his eyes. 

Then Robby stirred, fluttering his eyes open slowly, focusing on you with sleepy confusion that quickly shifted into something softer, almost disbelieving. “Am I dreaming?” he murmured as he blinked a few times, pushing himself up on one elbow. “Why are you in bed with me?”

You stayed seated on the edge with your hands in your lap. “Do you remember what happened yesterday?”

He rubbed his face with one hand, still half-asleep. “We went to the water park? Hannah loved the slides…”

“Not that, idiot,” you said quietly, a small smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. “Later. The karaoke.”

Robby froze. His eyes widened as the memories clearly flooded back. He let out a long groan and dropped back onto the pillow, covering his face with both hands. “Oh yeah… Jesus. I can’t believe I did that.”

“I bet you’re regretting it now.”

He lowered his hands slowly. “I might be deeply embarrassed. But I don’t regret it. I wanted to do something romantic for you. Something that showed you how I feel.”

You raised an eyebrow, trying to keep your tone light even as your pulse quickened. “Yeah? Nothing more romantic than singing off-key Aerosmith in front of a hundred strangers.”

Robby chuckled and pushed himself up to sit against the headboard. “Come on, it wasn’t that off-key.” His eyes met yours. “I meant every single word I said. About not wanting to miss another second without you. About you and Hannah being the best things that ever happened to me. About wanting another chance.”

You held his gaze for a long moment, the weight of his words settling heavily in your chest, breaking down your defences more and more each day. “I heard you loud and clear, Robby.”

Hannah stirred slightly in the other bed but didn’t wake. You stood up slowly, smoothing your sleep shirt. “I’m gonna head to the pools for a bit before she wakes up.”

Robby sat up straighter. “You can’t.”

You turned back to him, raising your eyebrow. “Why not?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, looking a little sheepish again. “Yesterday I… booked us dancing lessons on the beach. Salsa. For this morning.”

You stared at him. “And why the hell did you do that? Why didn’t you ask me first? I don’t wanna go.”

He let out a helpless laugh. “I don’t know. I was drunk and thought dancing salsa with you on the beach sounded like a great idea at the time.”

You crossed your arms. “Well, I’m not going.”

“Please go with me,” he said wofter now, almost pleading. He looked at you with those warm brown eyes that had always been able to weaken your resolve. “I’ll behave. I promise. Otherwise I’m gonna have to dance with the teacher, and that would be even more embarrassing than last night.”

You stood there in the quiet morning light, part of you still wanted to say no, to keep the boundaries firm, to protect the distance you’d fought so hard to maintain. But you knew if it wasn’t this, then he’d simply come up with another way of putting the two of you together in another situation. Being with him for these days had softened you more than you cared to admit, it had all worn down your defenses. And after every honest word he’d laid bare last night, combined with the way he was looking at you now with that sheepish, boyish smile and those earnest eyes that always saw straight through you, it made it very hard to keep saying no.

After dropping Hannah off at the resort’s supervised kids’ activities center, where she immediately ran off with a group of children to do crafts and play games, you and Robby walked the shaded pathways toward the beach.

The beach dancing area was set up in a beautiful, semi-private cove framed by gently curving palm trees and large rocks. The instructor, a local man, welcomed you both with open arms. “Perfect timing!. Come, come, partners, face each other. We start with the basic steps.”

Robby was a terrible dancer. He tried, God, he tried so hard, but his movements were initially stiff and awkward, his hips resisting the rhythm. He settled his hands on your bare waist with visible hesitation at first, but that hesitation quickly melted into something much hungrier. 

The first time the instructor called for a basic side step and Robby pulled you in, he pressed his palm firmly against the small of your back, splaying his fingers wide as if he needed to feel as much of you as possible. 

The heat of his touch burned straight through your skin, sending a spark racing up your spine. “Like this?” Robby asked the instructor as he attempted the next step.

His thigh accidentally slid between your legs for balance during a turn, pressing close for a second longer than necessary. You felt the warmth of him, the subtle shift of his hips, and heat pooled in your belly.

The instructor laughed good-naturedly. “Looser hips, my friend! Feel the music. Let it move you.”

Robby tried again, pulling you closer on the next basic. He brushed his chest against yours with every step, the thin fabric of his shirt and your bikini top did nothing to hide the heat of his body.

“This is harder than it looks,” he muttered close to your ear, his breath warm against your neck. He slid his hand a little lower on your back, digging his fingers in with hunger. “But I like having an excuse to hold you like this.”

You swallowed hard, trying to focus on the beat. “You’re terrible at this.”

He grinned as he dipped you slightly on the instructor’s cue. “But I’m trying. For you.” 

His body was pressed flush against yours, his hips rolling in what was supposed to be a salsa step but felt far more intimate. The subtle grind, the way his thigh stayed between yours for balance, the hungry way in which he dropped his to your mouth and lower, to the swell of your breasts, made your skin tingle everywhere he touched. 

Your pulse thundered in your ears, almost drowning out the music. Every turn, every close hold, every time his hands guided your hips, the tension built higher. He traced possessive circles on your lower back with his fingers. When the music slowed for a moment to practice a more sensual move, he looked down at you with heavy-lidded eyes, like he wanted to devour every inch of you right there on the sand in front of everyone.

You couldn’t take it anymore. You’d tried to fight every single advance he’d made since you both arrived. You’d tried to ignore the way he looked, more tan from the sun, those charming freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks, his soft body on full display in nothing but swim trunks. You’d tried to pretend you weren’t affected by the flood of memories rushing back every time he got close, or by the fantasies of what life could look like if you finally let him in. And you were bone-tired of pretending you didn’t want the same thing. Exhausted from denying yourself what your body craved so much, his hands, his mouth, the weight of him pressing you down, the way only he could make you fel.

Mid-step, you grabbed Robby’s hand tightly and started walking, pulling him firmly away from the group and down the beach. The ocean breeze tried cooling the flush on your skin but did nothing to calm the fire in your belly.

Robby stumbled slightly to keep up, surprised but not resisting. “Where are we going?”

You didn’t slow down, already scanning the shoreline ahead. “We’re going to have sex.”

He let out a startled and deep laugh that sent another shiver racing through you. A second later the laugh faded into pure disbelief. “Wait… are you serious?”

You kept walking, your breath coming faster as the arousal intensified with every second that went by without feeling Robby’s touch. “Yes, Michael.”

Robby’s grip on your hand tightened. “Let’s go back to the room then. No risk of anyone seeing—”

“It’s too far,” you cut him off, your voice breathy with need. “And they’re probably cleaning it right now.”

He let out an incredulous laugh, half-aroused, half-amused. “So what? We’re doing it in the wild?”

You glanced back at him, the corner of your mouth twitching despite the heat flooding your body. “Michael, it’s the beach, not the wilderness.”

“Excuse me,” he said, still laughing softly but with clear hunger in his eyes, “But I really like this resort. I don’t want to get banned for life from this chain.”

You stopped for a second, turning to look at him fully. Your voice dropped to a more direct and impatient tone. “You wanna fuck or not?”

His expression shifted instantly, completely undone. “Yes please.”

“Good, then stop complaining.” You kept walking until you found a good spot: a small, semi-secluded cove partially shielded by large rocks and leaning palm trees. The sand here was softer, shaded in patches by the foliage, with a clear but private view of the ocean. You pulled him behind the largest rock formation and Robby followed without hesitation, his hands already sliding to your waist the moment you stopped. The hunger in his touch matched the fire burning in your veins. He pressed you back against the smooth, sun-warmed rock, his body crowding yours, mouth hovering just inches from yours, breath ragged. The tension that had been building since the massage, since the karaoke, since the entire trip finally snapped.

The moment you pulled Robby behind the large, sun-warmed rock, the rest of the world fell away, all that existed was the heat between you, the desperate need that had been simmering since the very beginning of this trip.

You surged forward and kissed him. Robby met you instantly, a hungry sound rumbling in his chest as his hands grabbed your waist, pulling you flush against him. His mouth was hot and demanding, and his fingers dug into your hips with desperation. He kissed you like a man who had been starving ever since the last night you shared together, sweeping his tongue into your mouth, claiming, while he slid one up your back to tangle in your hair, tilting your head exactly how he wanted it.

He broke the kiss just enough to breathe against your lips. “I’ve been dreaming about this. Every single night since we got here. I didn’t think it would actually happen.”

You smiled against his mouth, sliding your hands up his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart under your palms. “All your stupid tricks finally worked.”

He groaned, pressing his forehead to yours as he roamed his hands restlessly over your body, down your sides, cupping your ass, pulling you harder against the growing hardness in his swim trunks. “All I did was to try and prove you how much I love you,” he murmured. “I want to be with you. Not just fuck you again. I want everything. You, Hannah, us as a family. That’s all it’s ever been about.”

Your hand slid down between you, palming the hard and thick outline of his cock through the fabric. He hissed sharply, jerking his hips forward into your touch. “It was torture,” he rasped, against your ear, “seeing you in that bikini every single day and not being able to touch you. Not being able to do this.”

You squeezed him gently, stroking the length of him through his trunks. “Maybe I wanted to touch your body too.”

He let out a shaky laugh that turned into a groan as you rubbed your thumb over the fat head. “I know. I could see the way you watched me. You’re not as subtle as you think you are.”

You couldn’t wait any longer. You hooked your fingers into the waistband of Robby’s swim trunks and pushed them down just enough to free him. His cock sprang out, the thick vein along the underside pulsed visibly as you wrapped your hand around the base, your fingers barely able to close fully around his girth. You stroked him slowly from base to tip, savoring the way he throbbed powerfully in your grip. “It’s your fault for having this fucking body,” you whispered. “It’s just my type.”

Robby let his head fall back against the rock with a moan, bucking his hips into your fist. “I was right,” he managed to say. “That guy the other day at the beach… he wasn’t your type, was he?”

You swept your thumb over the head on every upstroke, spreading the leaking precum and making him even wetter. Robby groaned deeply, jerking forward into your fist as you twisted your wrist just the way he liked, squeezing a little tighter on the way back down. “Please. That guy lacked everything I love in you.”

“Fuck… your hand feels so good,” he rasped. “Been dying to feel you touch me again.” He cursed under his breath, gripping your hip hard enough to leave marks. 

You sank slowly to your knees in the sand, until Robby’s cock stood right in front of you, flushed a deep, needy red at the head and already leaking a steady bead of precum. You looked up at him through your lashes, taking in the sight of him towering above you. 

As you wrapped one hand around the thick base, the heat of him pulsed strongly against your palm, the weight and girth of him making your mouth water. You started slow, torturously slow. Leaning in, you pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the leaking tip, tasting the salty, slightly bitter bead of precum that had gathered there. Robby’s hips jerked forward involuntarily as a whimper escaped from his chest. You kissed it again, slower this time, letting your lips linger as you savored the skin stretched tight over the swollen head. 

Then you dragged your tongue in a wet circle around it, tracing every ridge and vein, feeling the way he twitched and throbbed against your tongue with every pass. “Fuck… baby,” he groaned, already wrecked and sounding hoarse. One of his hands came down to gently grab your hair, trembling slightly as his fingers carded through the strands. “Come on… please… Take a little more, baby.”

You smiled against the slick head, barely parting your lips to take just the tip into the wet heat of your mouth. You sucked gently, swirling your tongue lazily around him, giving him only the lightest, teasing pressure. Robby’s moan was loud and needy, his thighs were trembling as he fought the powerful urge to thrust deeper into your mouth.

You pulled back just enough to speak, brushing your lips still against the glistening tip, a thin string of saliva connecting you. “You’ve been thinking about this the whole trip, haven’t you?” 

Robby closed his eyes for a second and nodded, almost like he was in pain. Then you took him deeper, sucking more of his length into your mouth. You hollowed our cheeks as you worked him with deliberate bobs of your head, savoring every inch. The taste of him, the salty skin that was so uniquely Robby, made you moan around his cock. The vibration drew another loud, desperate whimper from deep in his throat. 

You remembered every little trick he used to love from years ago, the way he liked the flat of your tongue pressing firmly along the sensitive underside, followed immediately by soothing suction, the way you hollowed your cheeks on the upstroke to create that perfect tight pressure. You did them all, eagerly and hungrily, losing yourself in the heavy weight of him on your tongue and the broken, needy sounds he couldn’t hold back no matter how hard he tried.

You slid your free hand between his spread legs, cupping and gently rolling his heavy balls, massaging them with careful pressure. Robby’s head fell back against the rock with a guttural groan that was almost too loud for the public setting. His hips stuttered forward, chasing the wet heat of your mouth as he fought for control.

“God… your mouth,” he panted, forcing his eyes to stay open. He couldn’t stop watching you, the way your lips stretched obscenely around his cock, the spit glistening on your chin and dripping down his shaft, the lust-drunk look in your eyes as you took him deeper with every bob of your head. “I can’t… fuck. You look so fucking good like this, on your knees for me.”

You moaned again around him, and took him as deep as you could, until your nose was brushing the dark, untrimmed hair at his base, holding him there for a long moment while your throat worked around him. You continued playing with his balls, gently tugging and rolling them, feeling them draw up tight as his pleasure built. 

Robby’s whimpers turned into full, unrestrained moans. He tightened his fingers almost painfully in your hair as he began rocking his hips shallowly, fucking your mouth with tiny movements. Spit dripped down your chin, coating your hand as you stroked what your mouth couldn’t reach, twisting your wrist on every upstroke just the way he liked.

You pulled off just enough to gasp for air, strings of thick spit connecting your swollen lips to his throbbing cock. “You gotta be quiet,” you whispered, “if you don’t want to attract an audience.”

Robby let out a shaky laugh that quickly dissolved into another deep moan as you licked a long stripe up the entire underside of his cock, tongue pressing firmly against the thick vein there.

“I can’t… I can’t be quiet when I’m finally feeling your mouth again. Fuck, I’ve missed this so much. Missed you so fucking much.”

You took him back in without warning, sucking harder and faster now. Robby’s moans grew louder, more needy, his body trembling as he fought the edge, his thighs shaking beside your head. “Baby… I’m close,” he warned, stuttering his hips forward. “So fucking close—”

You kept going, eager to push him over the edge, dying to feel his thick load flooding your mouth, but Robby suddenly pulled you off with a desperate groan. He hauled you up to your feet with strength. His cock, slick and throbbing and coated in your spit, pressed against your stomach. “Not yet,” he rasped. “Not like this. I want more. I want all of you.”

With a growl, he spun you around, pressing your front firmly against the rock. Your cheek rested against the stone as he yanked the ties of your bikini bottoms loose with impatient fingers until the fabric slid down your legs and pooled at your ankles. You kicked it aside impatiently, leaving yourself completely bare from the waist down. 

One of Robby’s large hands slid up your body from behind, slipping under the fabric of your bikini top. His palm was hot as it cupped your breast fully, squeezing the soft flesh with blatant hunger. He found your already hard nipple and rolled it slowly between thumb and forefinger, pinching just hard enough to send sparks of pleasure shooting straight down to your dripping core. You gasped, arching your back and pressing your breast harder into his hand, craving more of that delicious sting.

At the same time, he dipped his other hand between your legs from behind, dragging two thick fingers teasingly through your soaked folds, parting them and spreading your slick arousal everywhere. The wetness coated his fingers as he explored you, rubbing up and down your slit before finally finding your puffy clit. He circled it with the pad of his middle finger, pressing it just right, making your thighs tremble and your knees threaten to buckle against the rock. 

“Fuck, you’re soaked,” his voice was rough with lust. “This pussy is dripping for me already. You’ve been aching for my cock, huh?”

You moaned loudly and pushed back against his hand desperately. “Robby… I can’t wait anymore,” you gasped. “I need you inside me. Now. Please.”

He pressed a wet kiss to the back of your neck, grazing your skin with his teeth possessively. “Fuck, yes,” he groaned.

You felt the blunt head of his cock nudge against your entrance, sliding through your slick folds once, twice, teasing you both. Then, with one powerful thrust, he buried himself deep inside you.

The stretch was like something you never felt before, overwhelming and full, exactly what you’d been craving for days. Robby filled you completely, his cock dragged against every spot inside as he bottomed out with a satisfied groan. 

He stayed there for a long moment, buried to the hilt, both of you breathing hard together, his chest pressed flush against your back, one hand still massaging and kneading your breast, the other gripping your hip hard enough to leave marks.

Then he started moving, he was slow at first, giving you deep and rolling thrusts that let you feel every single inch of him. Robby snapped his hips forward deliberately, driving his cock so deep you swore you could feel him in your stomach. The wet sound of skin meeting skin mixed beautifully with the waves and your shared, breathy moans. 

Robby’s grip on your hip tightened as he gradually picked up the pace, fucking you harder, deeper. “God, you feel so fucking good,” he groaned right against your ear. One of his hands left your breast, sliding down your body until it reached your ass. He grabbed a full, greedy handful of the rounded flesh, squeezing hard enough to leave marks as he spread you open wider for him, pulling your cheeks apart so he could watch every inch of his cock as it disappeared inside your greedy pussy. Your arousal coated his shaft, strings of wetness connecting you every time he pulled back, only to slam in deeper. “So tight… so wet for me. Been thinking about this pussy every single day on this trip. You’re creaming all over me, baby. Can you feel how deep I am?”

You moaned loudly, pushing back to meet every powerful thrust. The rock was warm against your front, your breasts kept rubbing against it with every movement. He leaned over you more, changing the angle so he could fuck you even deeper, snapping his hips forward with raw purpose now. “You’re mine,” he growled against your ear. “This pussy is mine. You’re mine. Say it.”

You could only moan in response at first, lost in the overwhelming pleasure. “Y-yours.”

He grabbed your hips with both hands, digging his fingers in hard as he pulled you back onto his cock with every thrust. “Fuck, Robby… harder,” you gasped, still pushing back against him. “Don’t stop.”

“Never,” he growled, slamming into you deeper. “Not gonna stop until you’re coming all over my cock.”

You moaned louder, unable to hold back. Robby’s hand left your hip and slid up your body, pressing two fingers firmly against your lips. “Suck on them,” he growled hotly against your skin. “Before someone hears how well I’m fucking you. Be a good girl for me.”

You parted your lips obediently, taking his fingers deep into your mouth. You sucked on them eagerly, swirling your tongue around the digits just like you had around his cock earlier. Robby groaned deeply at the feeling of your muffled moans against his fingers, his hips slamming into you harder.

With his other hand, Robby found your swollen, aching clit. He pressed his digit firmly against the bundle of nerves, rubbing tight circles with exactly the pressure he knew drove you wild. He alternated between teasing strokes and faster, more insistent ones, never letting the rhythm become predictable. The dual sensation was devastating, not only his cock stretching and pounding into you from behind, but now his fingers working your clit relentlessly. 

“That’s it,” he rasped as he fucked you even deeper. “Suck my fingers while I ruin this pussy. You’re so fucking wet for me. Been thinking of it since the dance lesson, haven’t you? I could feel how soaked you were the whole time I was touching you.”

You moaned around his fingers, the sound vibrating against them as you sucked harder. Your legs shook uncontrollably. “Come for me,” he rubbed your clit faster and harder. “I want to feel you squeezing my cock when you cum. Let me feel how much you need this. How much you’ve been aching for me.”

The tension snapped, your orgasm crashing over you hard and suddenly. You cried out around his fingers, your pussy clenching rhythmically around his thick cock, fluttering and squeezing him tightly as waves of overwhelming pleasure rolled through your entire body. 

Robby’s thrusts grew erratic as he chased his own release. “Fuck… you feel so good when you cum. So tight. I’m so close, baby.” He kept fucking you through your orgasm, drawing it out with deep strokes, his fingers still rubbing your oversensitive clit in gentler circles. His voice was completely wrecked when he spoke again. “Can I finish inside? Please… I need to fill you up. I need to cum inside you.”

You pulled off his fingers just enough to gasp out. “Yes. Cum inside me. Fill me up, Robby. I want it so much.”

That was all he needed. Robby buried himself as deep as possible with a broken moan as he came. You felt every pulse as he emptied himself inside you, hot ropes of cum flooding your pussy in thick spurts. He kept thrusting through it, as if he wanted to push every single drop of his fat load as far inside you as possible. His body trembled against yours as he pressed his forehead to the back of your neck, breathing raggedly against your sweat-slicked skin.

Robby wrapped his arms around you from behind, holding you close as he softened inside you, placing lazy kisses along your shoulder and the back of your neck. His cum slowly leaked down your thigh in sticky trails, mixing with your own wetness. 

Eventually, you shifted, feeling the pleasant ache between your legs and the reality of where you were. You reached down, picked up your discarded bikini bottoms from the sand, and slowly tied them back on with slightly shaky fingers. Robby stayed close, resting his hands on your hips, stroking circles with his thumbs as if he couldn’t bear to stop touching you.

“We should go pick up Hannah,” you said softly, still sounding a little hoarse.

Robby didn’t move right away, he turned you gently to face him, cupping your face with his hands. “Wait,” he murmured. “What does this mean? Just admit it and stop fooling yourself. Tell me you want this as much as I do. That you want to be with me too. That you never minded sharing a room, or getting a couple’s massage, or taking dancing lessons. Tell me you actually like spending time together like this.”

You looked up at him, the vulnerability in his voice made your chest ache, and after an intense orgasm like the one he’d just given you, you couldn’t even fool yourself. You took a slow breath. “Yes… I do,” you admitted. “I like being with you, Robby. I like the sex. I like how you make me laugh. I like talking to you. I like… all of it.” His eyes lit up with hope, but you continued before he could speak. “But what happens with me? What happens with Hannah if you change your mind? If the charm wears off once we’re back home, dealing with real life.”

Robby’s expression turned serious, almost pained. He cupped your face more firmly, brushing your cheeks. “I wouldn’t go through all of this if I weren’t a hundred percent sure of what I feel and what I want. Hannah is the most important thing in my life. I’d die before hurting her. Or you. I’m not going anywhere this time. I promise.”

You searched his eyes, tears pricking at the corners of yours. “How can I believe you?”

He smiled softly, a little sheepish. “I sang in front of a crowd for you. That has to count for something.”

You laughed despite yourself. “This whole trip has been so nice… but real life isn’t a beach resort with massages and dancing lessons.”

Robby pulled you closer, resting his forehead against yours. “I want you when you’re tired from work. Sweaty, your hair a mess, exhausted. I want the long nights when we’re both too drained to speak, and the fights when we’re frustrated and still choose each other every single day. I want all of it.” He kissed you softly, then pulled back just enough to look into your eyes. “Please… I’ve missed so much already, don’t let me miss another thing.”

You smiled, tears slipping freely down your cheeks. You leaned in and kissed him again, slow and deep, full of everything you’d been holding back. When you pulled away, he searched your face with hopeful eyes. “Is that a yes?” he asked, barely above a whisper.

You smiled wider. “It’s a maybe.”

He kissed you again, deeper this time. “Say yes.”

You laughed softly against his lips. “Maybe.”

Another kiss, sweeter. “Yes?”

You melted into him, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Yes.”

Your reblog doesn’t just support me as a writer, it also helps this reach the people who read the first part, so please consider taking 0.00001 second to click that button, it’s free!!💜

A/N: I feel like, the way it happens in a lot of media, second parts are never quite as good as the first one. But people wanted a second part, and I wanted to write one too, so here’s what I came up with. I hope it wasn’t too long or boring. I’m so thankful for all the love and support the first part got. It genuinely makes me so happy to see that people enjoyed it🥹

There’s honestly so much I could write about these two, but it already felt long as it is. I don’t think I’ll write a third part, to be honest.

@blacpiink @fallout-girl219 @tpwklizzie @tlc3802 @findthebeautyinbreakdowns

dividers by: @cafekitsune

[cinnxmxngxrl]

Shared Custody pt 2

Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x reader

FIRST PART Updates Account

You convince yourself that sleeping with Robby was just a one-time relapse, and return to the co-parenting routine you’ve carefully built. But everything unravels when you’re dragged into a family vacation at a resort in Mexico. One full week of trying to survive Robby’s relentless attempts to win you back.

warnings/tags: smut, minors DNI, porn with plot (lots of plot), age gap (but readers age isn’t disclosed), jealous!robby, co-parenting, GirlDad!Robby, this is long as fuck so read it with time, they’re still down bad for each other, unprotected piv, semi-public sex, handjob, blowjob, fingering, creampie

You remembered that day as if it had been yesterday. The cold porcelain of the toilet seat under your thighs. The pregnancy test stick clutched in your trembling fingers while you tried to aim. The uncertainty that made every sound echo louder in your tiny studio apartment, the best place a med student could afford. The steady drip-drip-drip from the leaky faucet. The nervous pacing of Robby’s footsteps just behind the thin wooden door.

“You good in there?” he asked, you could picture him leaning in, pressing his ear against the wood like he could somehow hear your thoughts.

You quickly wiped away the silent tears that had been streaming down your cheeks. “Yeah…” Your voice came out shaky and small. “Yeah. I’m done.”

You wiped, flushed the toilet, and stood up on unsteady legs, pulling your pants back on. Carefully, you set the cup and the pregnancy test on the edge of the sink before washing your hands.

“Can I come in?” Robby asked from the other side. Guilt was already eating him alive. This was his fault. He should have been the one guiding you, teaching you how to become a great doctor. Instead, he had jeopardized everything,  your education, your career, your future. Now, because of him, you were taking a pregnancy test in a cramped bathroom, wondering what the hell you were going to do with your life if two pink lines appeared.

You didn’t answer with words. You simply walked to the door, opened it, and stepped aside so he could enter. “It says three to five minutes,” you murmured, nodding toward the test resting on the sink.

“How—” Robby cleared his throat when his voice threatened to crack. “How are you feeling?”

“Scared?” The word came out like a question. Truthfully, you didn’t even know if “scared” was the right word. What was the right word for finding yourself in a situation you’d never wanted, knowing it was your own damn fault? You should have been more careful. You should have said yes the first time he asked about wearing a  condom. You should have told him to pull out instead of moaning “fill me up, Robby” every single time like you had lost all sense. 

You knew the odds. You knew the risks. But when he was inside you, none of that had mattered. And now destiny was laughing in your face. You had no plan. If you were pregnant… what then? Goodbye to med school. Goodbye to your dream of graduating and matching into emergency medicine. You’d probably have to move back in with your parents and spend your days raising a child instead of becoming a doctor. And goodbye to Robby, because why would a man like him want to stay tied to the med student he’d accidentally gotten pregnant and the baby he never asked for?

Fresh tears slipped from the corners of your eyes, soaking your cheeks instantly. You tried to stay quiet, but the sobs broke free anyway.

“Hey, hey, hey… come here.” Robby closed the distance in one step. The heat of his body wrapped around you like a shield. He slid one strong arm around your waist, anchoring you against his solid frame, and the other hand cradled the back of your head. “It’s perfectly normal to be scared. But you’ve got me. You’re not alone in this.”

“What are we—” Another sob escaped, muffled against his shoulder. “What am I gonna do, Robby? What am I supposed to do?”

“Whatever feels right,” he whispered against your hair, pressing a gentle kiss there. “You’re supposed to do whatever you want to do. You have all the choices.”

“But which one is the right one?” You pressed harder into him, as if you could disappear into his chest. “Which one won’t make you hate me?”

“Jesus— Look at me.” He gently cupped your face with both hands, lifting it from his chest so you had no choice but to meet his eyes. His own were red and watery. “Let me say this once, and I need you to hear me. I could never hate you. None of this is your fault. It’s no one’s fault… this just happens, okay? If the test is positive, then… it’s not the end of the world. We’ve got options. We have time to think about it.”

“Then why does it feel like it is the end of the world?” You tried to hide your face again in the broad warmth of his chest, where your tears had already left a dark patch on his shirt. He wouldn’t let you. He kept your face cradled between his palms, one thumb softly stroking your cheek as he wiped away another tear. 

“Why does it feel like no matter what I choose, you’ll end up resenting me for it?”

“I won’t,” he assured you again, his voice steady even though you could feel how hard he was trying. “You have to think about what you want. Nothing is more important than that. I’ll be here for whatever you decide.”

“What if I don’t want to keep it?” The words tumbled out. “Wouldn’t you feel like… like I took something away from you? Wouldn’t you think I’m selfish?”

“It doesn’t matter what I think.” He leaned in and kissed the tip of your nose, his warm lips making you shiver. Then your cheek, tasting your tears. Then your lips, reassuringly. “If the test is positive and you choose to terminate 6he pregnancy, I wouldn’t think that makes you selfish. I wouldn’t think you’re a bad person or that you’re stealing something from me. I’d think you’re strong. I’d think you’re being brave. And I’d be right there with you.”

The calmness in his voice steadied you a little. You could tell he was terrified, probably having a panic attack on the inside, but he was pouring every ounce of strength into not showing it. He wanted to be the rock you could lean on, the one who had answer, who knew what to do, who’d be there to support you no matter what.

“Is that what you’d want?” he murmured against your lips. “An abortion?”

“I don’t know,” you whispered, so softly he might not have heard if he weren’t so close. “But… maybe it’s the only right choice. What would I even do with a baby? I’d have to drop out of med school… I’d fall so far behind. Raising a baby… I don’t know when I could even go back.”

“It doesn’t have to be like that, you know?” he said gently. “A lot of women finish their studies while pregnant. They work while being moms too. Think of Dr. Shamsi, she finished her residency while—”

You knew he meant well, but right now the last thing you needed was a pep talk about strong women. “Yeah, well, I’m not Dr. Shamsi, Robby,” you cut in, the words coming out harsher than you intended. “I don’t think I can do it. And I can’t… I can’t put that weight on you. That burden. A child, Robby. I’d feel so guilty knowing I trapped you.”

An incredulous laugh escaped him. He pulled back just enough to really look at you. “Trap me? Jesus fuck… do you even hear yourself? When have I ever made you feel like you’d be trapping me?” 

His tone edged toward anger, which only made your own flare up. “You didn’t ask for this! You’d be stuck with a child you never even wanted just because I didn’t want to get rid of it!” You couldn’t meet his eyes anymore and stared at the floor instead.

“A child…” He let out a slow breath. “A child doesn’t sound like the worst thing in the world.” The words he’d been too afraid to even think until now finally slipped out. “Yeah, it would be difficult. Yeah, it would be a fucking challenge. I’m not gonna lie, I’m scared. But I don’t think a baby would be the worst thing to ever happen. Not by far.” 

He’d be lying if he said he had never dreamed of having a child, of becoming a father. In his mid-twenties, he had pictured it so differently. Finding the love of his life, getting married, waiting a year or two before having their first baby, then another one soon after. A proper family. But life had gotten in the way, long hours in the ED, the weight of responsibility, his own fears and insecurities reshaping the entire trajectory of his existence. Time slipped through his fingers, and before he knew it, the dream had been pushed further and further into the distance. Definitely not like this, a baby at forty-nine with the fourth-year med student he’d been sleeping with in a messy situationship for only a few months… that was never part of the plan. And yet, as that pregnancy test sat on the edge of the sink, the possibility grew heavier, more real. Maybe this was how it was meant to happen. Maybe the universe had finally caught up with him. Maybe it was time to stop running, time to stop hiding, and finally commit to something bigger than work. Something that actually mattered. Something that’d change his life and give it a new meaning, a new purpose.

“You’re saying you’d want it?” you asked, surprise flashing in your eyes as you finally looked up at him. “If I were pregnant… you’d want the baby?”

“I’m saying I want you to do what you want. But yeah… if you chose to keep it, then I’d want it too. I’m in, 100%.” Behind the fear in his voice, you heard absolute certainty.

“And how would that even look?” you asked quietly. “How would we do it?”

“If we’re doing it, we do it right. Together.” He took your hands in his, brushing his thumbs over your knuckles. “You could move in with me. Once the baby’s born, we’d arrange our shifts so one of us is always with them. We’d get a sitter to help us so you can still have time to do your residency. You have me. You’ll have me every step of the way.”

“Promise?” you whispered.

“Promise.”

Silence stretched between you, as if the rest of the world had stopped spinning. In that tiny bathroom, it was just the two of you, holding each other’s hands with the promise of facing whatever came next together.

“I think it’s been over five minutes,” Robby said finally, glancing toward the sink. “Want to check?”

You nodded, and Robby released one of your hands, picked up the test, and held it between you without looking at the result yet. “Together?” he asked.

You swallowed. “Together.”

The imposing voice of Dana cut through the fog in your mind. “Earth to you… hello?”

You blinked, startled, and reluctantly dragged your eyes away from the computer screen where you’d been pretending to chart for the last ten minutes. Dana was leaning against the nurses’ station counter with one hip, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Are you even listening to me right now? Because I’ve been talking to myself for five minutes. What’s up with you? You look like you didn’t close an eye last night.”

You forced a small, nervous laugh and quickly looked back down at the computer, hoping the glow of the screen would hide the exhaustion on your face. “Sorry… I slept okay,” you replied, trying to sound nonchalant and unbothered. You weren’t fooling anyone, least of all Dana. You could feel her eyes studying you, taking in the faint shadows under your eyes, the slight slump of your shoulders, and the way you kept subtly shifting in your chair. Because no matter how hard you tried to focus on work, your body was still painfully aware of last night. The ghost of Robby’s thrusts still lingered between your thighs, a delicious ache that refused to fade even twelve hours later. 

Every time you moved, you were reminded of how hard he had taken you, how thoroughly he had ruined you. Your muscles were sore in the best and most inconvenient way possible. You crossed your legs under the desk, trying to ignore the throb that pulsed through you at the memory. The last thing you needed was Dana figuring out why you were so distracted. Unfortunately, Dana had the observational skills. She narrowed her eyes even further, tilting her head as she continued to stare at you. “Yeah… sure you did.”

Dana drifted his gaze past your shoulder down the corridor. Her expression shifted almost imperceptibly, lifting her brows a fraction and her mouth twitching like she’d tasted something sour. You followed her line of sight to Robby, striding toward trauma two, wearing his navy scrubs and cargo pants. There was a loose, easy roll to his shoulders, a confidence in his steps that screamed satisfaction. The corners of his mouth were curved in a half-smile that was the unmistakable “I got laid and it was fucking amazing” look.

Dana let out a dry huff of laughter, crossing her arms over her chest. “Jesus. I hate when he walks around with that ‘I got laid and it was amazing’ face. It’s obnoxious as hell. Makes the rest of us feel like we’re doing it wrong.”

You kept your face carefully neutral, tapping your fingers against the keyboard, but without writing anything. “Maybe he’s just in a good mood.”

“Oh, please, don’t give me that. You know that face, it’s always the same with that man.” Dana tilted her head, studying him as he paused to talk with Victoria, that satisfied smile lingering a beat too long. She narrowed her eyes, thinking hard for a second, then her head snapped back toward you when realization hit him. “Wait a minute… That face. That exact face is too familiar. It’s not just his regular ‘I got some’ look. That’s the same damn face he used to wear back when you two were sneaking around four years ago. And I haven’t seen it on him once since you two called it quits. Not a single time.”

Heat flooded your cheeks instantly. You felt cornered, exposed, like a deer caught in headlights. Dana ran this place, nothing escaped her eyes. Trying to lie to her was usually pointless, she could smell bullshit from miles away. “I– I really need to finish these charts,” you stammered. “I promised Hannah I’d try to get home early so we could—” The excuse died on your tongue, it sounded pathetic even to your own ears.

She looked at you like she’d already decided you were guilty. “Please tell me you didn’t do it.”

“Didn’t do what?”

She snorted. “You’re a terrible liar. Always have been.”

You exhaled through your nose, dropping your shoulders in defeat. You glanced around the nurse station. It was quiet, no one close enough to overhear, then leaned in just a fraction.“Okay,” you muttered. “It was one time. One weak moment. I’m not doing it again.”

Dana didn’t t look surprised, just disappointed in the resigned way of someone who’s watched this film before and knew how it ended . “You’re so stupid,” she said, almost fondly. “Letting that mess of a man back in again.”

“I know.” You rubbed a hand over your face, wishing you could teleport anywhere but here. “I know. I’m just… so weak when it comes to him. He’s got this way of looking at me, like I’m the only thing in the room that matters, and the way he touches me…” You trailed off. “God, Dana, you don’t know how good it is. How he remembers every single—”

She held up a hand with the palm out. “Stop. Right there. I do not need the details. I’ve worked with that man for the last 20 years of my life, and I still got to work with him for the next eight hours. Spare me the play-by-play.”

“Sorry. It’s just… it felt like coming home, you know? And then this morning reality hit like a truck. And I realized I fucked up last night.”

Dana studied you for a long beat, and her expression softened just a fraction, enough to show the concern underneath.“Honey,” she said quietly, “you’re not weak. You’re human. And that man has always known exactly which buttons to push with you. But you’ve built something solid these last five years. Don’t throw that away because the sex is good.”

You nodded, swallowing hard. “I told him it was a one-time thing. A relapse. I’m not doing it again. I swear.”

Dana arched her eyebrow high. “You swear.”

“Yeah.” You met her eyes even if your stomach twisted. You were embarrassed to let anyone know about your poor life choices, but if you could trust anyone, that was Dana, one of the only people who’d been here since the start of your story with him. “Last night was… it was stupid. It won’t happen again.”

She studied you for a long beat, then she pushed off the counter, stepping closer and dropping her voice to that tone she used when she’s done playing nice.“You'd better not. Go out. Meet someone. Anyone whose last name isn’t Robinavitch. Someone who can actually commit to a relationship.”

You looked down at your hands, still faintly wrinkled from too much hand sanitizer, a nervous habit you’d gotten out of him. “It’s not that easy.”

“It’s not supposed to be easy,” she countered. “But it’s supposed to be possible. Find a guy who doesn’t bolt after a month because he ‘feels trapped’ and ‘needs space.’ Someone who doesn’t look at commitment like it’s an impossible mission. Someone who stays.”

The words sting because they’re true. Robby never lied about it, he’d told you early on he wasn’t built for the long haul, that relationships felt like another thing he’d inevitably fuck up. And when Hannah came along, when the exhaustion and the shifts and the fear piled up, he didn’t fight to keep you together. He just… drifted. Back to separate houses, separate beds, separate lives. 

“Hon, you know Robby was not made for a relationship. He’s a great dad, nobody’s arguing that. The man would walk through fire for that little girl. But you? He loves you in the way he knows how: sporadically. And that’s never gonna change. Keep it that way. Keep him in the dad column. Don’t let him back into the partner one.”

You rubbed your temples, the ache from last night’s lack of real sleep settling in behind your eyes. “I know. I do. It’s just… when he’s there, when he’s touching me, talking to me like I’m still his… it’s like the last five years never happened. Like we could pick up where we left off.”

“That’s the trap,” Dana said quietly. “It feels like home because it used to be. But homes can be haunted too.”

In the days that followed, you did everything you could to avoid Robby. At work, you kept your distance, volunteering for procedures on the opposite side of the ED whenever possible and burying yourself in charts or patient updates the moment you felt his presence nearby. Because every single time your eyes met his, even for a brief second, your body betrayed you.

You remembered the crushing weight of him on top of you that night, the way he’d fucked you into the mattress like the world was ending. You remembered how perfectly your bodies still moved together, how easily he could pull those broken sounds from your throat. Years had passed, but the fire between you hadn’t dimmed. If anything, it was burning brighter and hotter than ever, threatening to consume every boundary you had built.

Thankfully, Robby seemed to sense your need for space and didn’t push. He gave you room to breathe at the hospital, only speaking to you when a case genuinely required collaboration. His tone stayed strictly professional, his touches nonexistent. He still called every evening like clockwork to talk to Hannah, but with you he remained carefully polite, never lingering, never teasing, never crossing the lines you had drawn. 

You should have been relieved. He was finally respecting your wishes, he was doing exactly what you had asked him to do, and yet… on nights like this, when Hannah was at his place for her half of the week, the silence in your house felt suffocating. The emptiness pressed in from every corner. No little footsteps pattering down the hallway, no giggles echoing from the living room. Just you, alone in the quiet, with nothing but your own thoughts to keep you company. And your mind refused to shut off, It buzzed loudly, relentlessly, replaying every moment of that night in vivid detail, the heat of Robby’s skin, the burn of his beard against your neck, the groan in your ear when he came undone inside you. 

You kept hearing his promises afterward: that he was a changed man, that this time he wanted you for real. Not out of duty because he’d gotten you pregnant. Not because he felt trapped by responsibility. But because he truly wanted to be with you, because he loved you. God, you wanted to believe him so badly. There were moments, weak and dangerous moments when you wished you could be reckless enough to fall for every word that came out of his mouth. To let yourself be dumb and hopeful and blind, just like you were five years ago.

Maybe you would have risked it if you were the only one who would get hurt when everything inevitably fell apart. You could survive a broken heart, you’d done it before. But Hannah couldn’t, she was innocent in all of this. She didn’t deserve to watch her parents try and fail again, to feel the instability, the confusion, the heartbreak of seeing her mother and father almost become a family, only for it to crumble. You refused to gamble with your daughter’s emotional safety just because you still craved the man who once broke your heart.

The knock on the door came right on time, just as the late afternoon sun was starting to slant through the living room windows. You were still in your scrubs, hair thrown up in a messy bun, when you opened the door to find Robby standing there with Hannah perched on his hip, her little pink backpack slung over his shoulder, making him look both silly and endearing at the same time, and her head resting sleepily against his chest.

“Hey,” Robby said softly. “We’re here.”

Hannah’s face lit up the second she saw you. “Mommy!” She reached both arms out, already wiggling to get to you. Robby shifted her gently into your arms, brushing his hand against your side in the process. The brief contact sent an unwelcome spark through you that you immediately tried to ignore.

“Hi, baby girl,” you murmured, pressing a kiss to her soft brown hair, she smelled like the strawberry shampoo Robby always used on her. “Did you have a good time with Daddy?”

“We had a great time,” Robby answered for her, stepping inside and closing the door behind him. He set her little backpack down by the couch and rubbed the back of his neck, looking unusually hesitant. 

“Listen… I’ve been thinking about something.”

You raised an eyebrow, bouncing Hannah lightly on your hip as she played with the collar of your top. “That sounds ominous.”

He let out a small laugh, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “Not ominous. Just… I’m thinking of taking some days off work. Vacation days.” Your surprise must have shown on your face because Robby quickly continued. “I’ve been thinking about taking her somewhere warm. She’s been talking about the beach nonstop lately. There’s this resort in Mexico I’ve been looking at, very kid-friendly, right on the beach. Thought it might be nice for her to run around in the sand and actually see the ocean.”

Robby had never been one to take vacations. For most of his life, work had consumed him completely. He was drowning in the ED, the never-ending stream of patients, the constant pressure of being the one everyone relied on. There was always something more important, and a quiet voice in the back of his head constantly whispered that everything would crumble if he wasn’t there to hold it all together. He had never felt the pull to travel, no place ever seemed worth leaving the hospital for. Nothing could impress him or hold his attention long enough to make him want to step away. His entire identity had been tied to the job for so long that the idea of doing anything else felt foreign, almost selfish.

That was before Hannah arrived, she changed everything. From the moment she came into his life, Hannah gave him something he had never truly had before, and that was real purpose. She became the reason he woke up every single day determined to be better, to be the kind of father she deserved. The person who had to stay strong and healthy because she depended on him for everything, from teaching her how to tie her shoes, to how to be kind, how to stand up for herself. 

But Hannah had given him more than just purpose. She had awakened in him a brand-new desire to actually live. For the first time in years, his world expanded beyondwork. He wanted to do things, he wanted to see things, and more than anything, he wanted to experience them with her. His life no longer felt like it should revolve solely around the ED, he craved as much free time as he could carve out so he could share it with his daughter, watching her discover the world. He refused to miss even a single moment of her childhood while she was still small and everything felt unique to her. Hannah had unknowingly pulled him out of the endless cycle of work and survival. 

And that was how the trips began. Beach days where Hannah squealed at the waves and collected seashells in her bucket. Lazy summer afternoons fishing at a lake. Winter weekends at a cabin resort in the mountains, where they built snowmen in the backyard and drank hot chocolate by the fire. Whatever Hannah wanted to do, Robby made it happen.

You nodded slowly, processing the information. You dropped Hannah off carefully on the floor, and she immediately walked to her bedroom, mumbling something about saying hello to her stuffed animals. “Mexico… That sounds really nice for her. When were you thinking?”

“Probably in a couple of weeks, if I can get the time approved. I’d take about a week.”  He paused, watching your expression carefully. “Are you okay with that? With me taking her?”

“Yeah,” you said without hesitation. “Of course I’m okay with it. She’ll love it. Just make sure you send me all the flight information and the hotel details once you have them. I want to know exactly where she’ll be and how to reach you.”

“Already planning on it,” he assured you. “I’ll send everything as soon as it’s booked.” A comfortable silence settled for a moment. Then Robby shifted his weight and looked at you again, something vulnerable flickering behind his eyes. “Actually… I wanted to ask you something else.” He rubbed the back of his neck again, a tell you knew too well. “Would you want to come with us?”

You blinked, caught completely off guard. “What?”

“I’d pay for everything,” he added quickly. “Your flight, your room. You don’t have to worry about that. You’ve been working insane hours lately with residency. It might be good for you to get away for a few days, too. Relax. Sleep in.”

The offer hung in the air between you, and for one brief second, you let yourself imagine it. You pictured the three of you on a beach in Mexico. Hannah running barefoot through the warm sand, her hair messy from the ocean breeze, laughing with pure joy every time a wave came close enough to tickle her toes. You saw yourself and Robby sitting nearby on lounge chairs, drinking margaritas while the sun kissed your skin. The sound of the waves rolling onto the shore, lulling you into a nap you hadn’t allowed yourself in years. 

After surviving on less than six hours a night for so long, the mere idea of lying back on a lounge chair and actually resting felt almost sinful. Vacations had always been a luxury you couldn’t afford. Not with the mountain of student loans, the demands of your residency, and the constant juggle of motherhood. The thought of taking time off just to relax had felt selfish, unrealistic, and completely out of reach. And now Robby was offering it all on a silver platter.

You quickly shoved the beautiful images away before they could take root and make you weak. Because that was the problem with Robby’s offer, it wasn’t just a vacation. It was a week of playing house, of blurred lines, and of watching him be the devoted father he had become, while your stupid heart remembered exactly how good things used to feel when the three of you were almost a real family.

“Robby…” You let out a slow breath. “Thank you. Really. That’s incredibly generous. But I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

He furrowed his brow slightly. “Why not?”

“Because going on a vacation like that, the three of us,  it would be confusing. For her, especially. If we’re sharing space like a family for a whole week, she might start getting ideas about us getting back together. I don’t want to give her false hope. And it’d be confusing for us two, we need to keep our distance after… You know what.”

Robby’s jaw tightened for a moment, but his voice stayed calm. “We can get separate rooms. Hell, we don’t even have to hang out the whole time if you don’t want to. You could do your own thing, be at a different pool, get spa treatments, whatever. I’m not asking you to pretend we’re a couple. I just… I want to do this for you. You deserve a break too.”

You shook your head, even as a small, traitorous part of you ached at how sincere he sounded. “No, Robby. Thank you, but no. It’s sweet of you to offer, but it’s too complicated. We’ve worked really hard to keep things stable and clear for Hannah. Mixing a family vacation into that… it blurs too many lines. I appreciate it, I really do. But I think it’s better if it’s just the two of you.”

He watched you for a long moment, something like disappointment passing across his face, a quiet frustration he tried so hard to hide. “Alright,” he said quietly. “Message received. I’ll just take her, then. But the offer stands if you ever change your mind.”

You gave him a grateful smile, even though your chest felt tight from how much you wanted to say yes, because of how much you wished that maybe in another life, Robby and you could be those parents sunbathing in Mexico with their kid. “I won’t. But thank you.”

He nodded once, lingering for another few seconds like he wanted to say more, but decided that by pushing too hard to get close to you again, he’d only end up pushing you away. “I’ll text you the details as soon as everything’s booked.”

“Sounds good.”

Before heading toward the door, Robby paused. He gave you one last long look, the kind that always managed to slip past every defense you’d carefully built over the years. In that single glance, you were flooded with memories you spent most days trying desperately not to dwell on. Memories from five years ago, back when everything still felt possible. Back when you still believed, with naive, foolish hope, that the two of you could somehow make it work.

And then there were the much more dangerous memories from just two weeks ago, the night where, for a few stolen hours, it felt like the rest of the world had simply stopped existing. His hands on your body like he still owned every inch of it, the way he’d whispered your name against your skin, the overwhelming feeling that you had teleported back in time, back to when it was just the two of you. For those few hours, you had let yourself believe again. You had let yourself imagine that maybe, just maybe, there could still be a “we” in your future.

A couple of days later, you heard the knock of the door echo through the house just as you were finishing packing Hannah’s favorite stuffed capybara into her little backpack. You opened the door to find Robby standing on the porch. Hannah immediately squealed at the sight of him.

“Daddy!” She bolted forward, launching herself into his arms. Robby caught her with ease, laughing as he lifted her high and spun her once before settling her on his hip. “Hey, angel,” he said, pressing a loud kiss to her cheek. “You ready for Daddy’s house?”

You stepped aside to let them both in, arms crossed loosely over your chest as you watched the usual handoff routine unfold. Hannah was buzzing with energy, clutching Robby’s shirt with her little hands. “Daddy, Daddy! Are we really going to the beach soon?” she asked with her eyes wide, full of pure excitement. “With the ocean and the sand?”

Robby grinned, the kind of soft and genuine smile he only ever wore for her. “We sure are, baby girl. I already picked out a really nice hotel. It’s right on the beach. Want me to show you the pictures later when we get home?”

“Yes!” Hannah bounced in his arms, practically vibrating. “Does it have a pool? And ice cream? And can I get a new swimsuit to wear?”

“It has a huge pool, and I’m pretty sure they have all the ice cream you can eat,” Robby answered patiently. He glanced over at you while still holding her. “I booked one of the family suites with a big balcony overlooking the ocean. You’re gonna love it, Han.”

Hannah gasped dramatically, her little mouth forming a perfect ‘O’. “Mommy, did you hear? Daddy got a hotel with a balcony! For the ocean!”

You couldn’t help but smile at her pure joy, even as a knot started forming in your stomach. “I heard, sweetheart. Sounds amazing.”

Robby set Hannah down so she could run to grab her stuffed animal from the couch. The moment she was out of earshot, he lowered his voice slightly. “I meant what I said the other day. The offer’s still open if—”

Before he could finish, Hannah came racing back, clutching her capybara tightly. “Daddy, can Mommy come with us to the beach? Please?”

Robby didn’t miss a beat. He looked straight at his daughter with an innocent expression that you knew was anything but. “You know what, Han? I was actually thinking about inviting Mommy too. What do you think? Would you like Mommy to come on the trip with us?”

Hannah’s entire face lit up like the Fourth of July. She spun toward you so fast she nearly tripped over her own feet. “Mommy! You have to come! Please please please! We can build sandcastles together and swim and eat ice cream and watch the sunset and— and everything!”

You shot Robby a deadly look over Hannah’s head, the kind that promised a painful retribution the moment you two were alone. He simply raised his eyebrows in mock innocence. The bastard knew exactly what he was doing. He was weaponizing the one person he knew you could never say no to. Hannah. She had always been your biggest weakness, your softest spot, and Robby knew it better than anyone. Those big, warm brown eyes were lethal. One pleading look from her, and your resolve crumbled like sand.

And right now, she was using every ounce of that power, blinking up at you with hope while clutching your hand like her entire happiness depended on your answer. It was unfair, completely unfair. Robby wasn’t just standing by and letting her beg, he was actively encouraging it, using your daughter as the ultimate emotional leverage. He knew you could resist him, he knew you could fight your own feelings, your own desires, your own stupid heart. But Hannah? Saying no to her when she looked at you like that felt almost cruel. And the worst part? He wasn’t even trying to hide how satisfied he was with himself, that tiny twitch at the corner of his mouth said everything. He was enjoying this far too much.

“Hannah, baby…” You crouched down to her level, gently brushing a strand of brown hair behind her ear. “Mommy would love to, but I’m super busy with work right now. I have so many shifts and—”

Robby’s voice cut in smoothly from behind her. “Actually, you have a bunch of vacation days saved up. I checked it yesterday.”

You straightened up slowly, narrowing your eyes at him, silently warning him to stop this nonsense before it went too far. “Robby.”

He shrugged, completely unbothered. “Just stating facts. You shouldn’t lie to your daughter, you know?”

Hannah grabbed your hand with both of hers, swinging it dramatically. “Mommy, pleeease? Pretty, pretty please!” You opened your mouth to respond, but Hannah was already in full pleading mode, her big puppy-brown eyes, exactly like Robby’s, staring up at you with devastating effectiveness.

“I really can’t afford it right now, sweetheart,” you tried again. “Plane tickets and hotels are expensive, and Mommy—”

“If Mommy can’t pay,” Robby interrupted you. “Then Daddy will pay. I’ve got it covered. Flights, resort, activities, all of it. You wouldn’t have to worry about a single thing.”

Hannah tugged harder on your hand, bouncing on her toes. “See? Daddy’s paying! So you can come! Please, Mommy? I want all of us together. Pretty pleeeeease.”

You felt cornered, trying to come up with more excuses, but as you reached inside your head, you couldn’t think of any. Robby stood there looking far too pleased with himself, while your daughter continued her relentless assault with those lethal eyes and endless enthusiasm.

“Hannah…” you started, searching desperately for another excuse.

“But Mommy,” she whined, pressing her face against your leg, “I’ll miss you so much if you stay here.”

Robby, the absolute traitor, decided to join forces. “She’s got a point,” he said casually, though his eyes were anything but casual when they met yours. “It wouldn’t be the same without you. And like I said before, I can get us separate rooms. You can do your own thing the whole time if you want. But it would mean a lot to her… and to me.” 

The “and to me” was spoken so quietly you almost missed it. You looked between the two of them, your daughter with her hopeful, shining eyes and her father, the man you still stupidly loved,  with that steady and patient gaze that had always been able to wear you down. The silence stretched. Hannah’s lower lip started to tremble just slightly, the ultimate weapon in her arsenal.

With a long, defeated sigh, you finally gave in. “…Fine,” you muttered, rubbing your temple. “I’ll go too.”

Hannah let out an ear-piercing squeal of pure delight and threw herself at your legs, hugging them tightly. “Yay! Mommy’s coming! We’re all going to the beach together!”

Robby’s smile was slow and satisfied, though he tried to keep it modest. “That’s great,” he said softly, his eyes never leaving yours. “Really great.”

You pointed a finger at him over Hannah’s head. “You’re going to pay for this later, Robinavitch.”

His only response was a knowing chuckle. “Looking forward to it.”

Hannah continued dancing around the living room in celebration, already chattering about sandcastles, seashells, and swimming with dolphins. You stood there watching her, with your heart full of love for your daughter, loving every second of seeing her so happy, and equal parts dread and excitement about what you’d just agreed to, a family vacation in Mexico with Robby. God help you.

Hours later, the glow of your bedside lamp was the only light in the room. You were already tucked into bed, wearing an old, oversized t-shirt that had seen better days. Your phone suddenly vibrated on the nightstand, making you glance at the screen, letting out a slow breath as soon as you noticed who was calling. A Facetime from Robby. 

You hesitated for two rings, it was almost midnight, and you didn’t feel like having any possibly agitating conversation right before your bedtime, but ultimately ended up accepting the call. Robby’s face filled the screen almost immediately, he was in his bedroom too, the light of his lamp illuminating his face. His hair was messy, like he’d been running his hand through it, and his glasses were perched low on his nose, those fucking glasses… No, don’t even go there, you silently muttered to your brain

“Hey,” his voice sounded rougher, the way it always got late at night. A small smile tugged at his lips. “You already in bed?”

“Yeah,” you replied, adjusting the blanket over your lap, as if trying to cover yourself up. “It’s late, Robby.”

He hummed in agreement, slowly dragging his eyes over what he could see of you on the screen. “You look comfortable. Cute shirt.” There was a brief pause before he asked, almost casually, “So… have you started packing swimsuits yet?”

You stared at him for a moment, the irritation you’d been carrying for the past hours finally bubbled up. “Robby… we need to talk.”

Robby lifted his eyebrows slightly, but the lazy smile didn’t leave his face. “Alright. About what?”

“You manipulated me into agreeing to this trip.” 

Robby let out a low chuckle. “Manipulated? Damn, you’re using big words tonight.”

“It’s not funny,” you said sharply, though you kept your voice quiet so you wouldn’t wake Hannah. “You used our daughter to convince me, and then you joined in. That was low, even for you.”

He tilted his head, still smiling like this was all some lighthearted game. “Anything else?”

You narrowed your eyes. “Yes. You guilt-tripped me. The whole ‘it would mean a lot to her… and to me’ line? That was manipulation.”

Robby leaned back against his headboard, resting one arm behind his head, giving you an even better view of his bare chest. He looked far too relaxed for someone being accused of emotional manipulation. “Jesus,” he muttered, still chuckling softly. “Oh-ho-ho, I’m so evil, I manipulated the mother of my child into letting me take her on a fully paid week at a luxury beach resort in Mexico.” He raised an eyebrow, mock-serious. “Am I gonna go to prison for that?”

“Robby.”

“Relax,” he said, softening his tone just a fraction, though the amusement was still there. “Hannah’s excited. You saw her. She wants all three of us there. I’m just trying to give her what she wants.”

“You know exactly what you’re doing,” you shot back. “I know your real agenda behind all of this.”

He tilted his head again, looking curious now. “Oh yeah? And what’s my agenda, according to you?”

You sat up a little straighter in bed, clutching the blanket tighter. “You’re using this stupid trip as an excuse to try and get back with me. You think throwing money at a vacation and putting us in the same space for a whole week is going to magically fix everything. It’s not going to work.”

For a moment, Robby just looked at you, his expression unreadable. Then that stupid smirk of his spread across his face again. “Have you seen me in swim trunks lately? I look real good. You might have to swallow your words when you see me.”

You let out an exasperated scoff, though you couldn’t stop the flush that crept up your neck. You hated the way he could still make you laugh when you were trying to be pissed. You hated the way your body still reacted to his words. “You’re impossible. Seriously, it’s impossible to have a serious conversation with you sometimes.”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, clearly enjoying himself. “Sun, sand, good drinks, me looking like this… you never know.”

“I’ll go,” you said, cutting him off before he could keep going. “But don’t even think this means anything else. We’ll get separate rooms. We’ll make separate plans. I’m going for Hannah. That’s it. Don’t get any ideas.”

Robby ignored your warning completely. “You look so gorgeous right now,” he murmured. Suddenly, his voice went quieter, more intimate. Robby moved his eyes slowly over your face, down to the collar of your shirt and back up again. “All soft and sleepy in bed like that. Fuck… I wish I were lying there with you.”

Your stomach flipped despite yourself, the way he said it, so sincere and full of a hunger that never ceased but only grew stronger every day, made heat bloom in your belly. You wanted to scream at how easily he could still do that to you. “Robby…” you warned him.

“I’m serious,” he continued. “I miss the way you feel under me. The way you breathe when you’re falling asleep next to me. I miss—”

“Goodbye, Robby.” You didn’t wait for him to finish, you ended the facetime call with a tap of your finger, plunging your screen into darkness. The room felt suddenly too quiet, too empty without his presence there. You dropped your phone onto the mattress beside you and stared up at the ceiling. Your skin felt warm, your mind was already replaying the way he’d looked at you, the tone of his voice when he said he wished he was lying there with you.

You pulled the blanket higher up to your chest, trying to ignore the storm of feelings Robby had just stirred up with nothing but his voice. It didn’t work, the ache was still there, as well as the flutter in your chest. The way your heart tripped over itself whenever he looked at you like that. Five years later, and Michael could still make your stupid heart race like you were that same fourth-year med student who used to sneak into his place late at night after shift. And now you had agreed to spend an entire week with him. A full week in Mexico. Seven days of Robby being Robby, charming, attentive, and far too good at reminding you exactly why you fell for him in the first place.

You had to force yourself to go back to one of the saddest days you could remember. Robby had come home from a brutal twelve-hour shift. You had just collapsed onto the couch after finally getting Hannah down, she’d been fussy all day, teething and crying restlessly. The moment he walked through the door, you could tell it had been a bad one. His eyes were glassy and distant, the lines on his face etched deeper than usual. Lately, every shift seemed to carve something out of him. He moved closer and pressed a quick, almost mechanical kiss to your forehead. No hello. No “how was your day.” Not even the ghost of a smile. Just autopilot, he was running on empty.

He sat on the edge of the kitchen counter, far from you, shoulders slumped. “There’s some pasta in the fridge I made,” you whispered, hoping it would reach him. He didn’t answer, didn’t even nod. He just stared at nothing, too drained to move.

Then Hannah let out a small cry from her crib. Before you could push yourself up, Robby was already on his feet. He scooped her up gently against his shoulder, swaying her in a soothing rhythm. “Are you okay, little angel?” he cooed softly, tender in a way it hadn’t been for you in weeks. “Yes, you’re okay. Yes, you are. Daddy’s here… shhh, go back to sleep.” That was the only moment you saw him smile genuine, and heartbreakingly soft as he held his daughter.

Tears burned in your eyes as you stood and walked closer to him. You had spent so many sleepless nights turning it over in your mind, and you couldn’t keep prolonging the inevitable. “Robby… we need to talk.”

“About us?” he replied, already sensing where this was going.

You nodded, feeling your throat tight. “Why do I get the feeling that you don’t want to be with me? That… you regret telling me to move in with you and being together?”

Robby sighed heavily, rubbing his temples like the weight of the world was pressing down on them. “It’s just work. You have no idea what it’s like trying to hold the whole fucking department together when everything is crumbling down and—”

“It’s not just that,” you cut him off. “You don’t look at me. You don’t talk to me. I understand your job is hard, that you’re stressed and exhausted, but… shit, Robby, all we do is ignore each other. The only time we actually speak is to argue about something stupid.” The tears slipped free then, there was no holding them back.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “I thought I could do all of this, but I—” Tears welled in his eyes too, spilling over as he tried to hold it together. “I don’t know what to do. I—” A sob cut him off.

“Do you need space?” you asked, dreading the answer. “Is that it? You need us to take some time?”

He looked at you for a long moment, broken and defeated. “Yes.”

Two weeks had passed, and before you realized it, the suitcase lay now open on your bed, half-filled with the folded clothes you had carefully picked for the trip. You stood in front of it, folding another sundress, while Hannah sat cross-legged on the floor surrounded by her own small pink suitcase and a pile of toys.

“Hannah, baby, do you have everything?” you asked for what felt like the tenth time. “Swimsuits? Sunscreen? The colouring books Daddy bought you for the plane?”

Hannah nodded enthusiastically, holding up her favorite ruffled swimsuit. “Yes, Mommy! And my water wings and the new sunglasses Daddy got me!” She beamed with uncontainable excitement. “Are we leaving soon? Is Daddy almost here?”

“Any minute now,” you replied, zipping up the main compartment of your suitcase with a sigh. Your stomach had been in knots all morning, this trip still felt like a terrible idea the more you thought about it, but Hannah’s joy made it impossible to back out now.

Right on cue, there was a knock at the front door. Hannah shot up like a rocket and ran toward it, yelling “Daddy!” at the top of her lungs.

You followed more slowly, pulling both suitcases behind you. When you opened the door, Robby stood there in a casual white linen shirt and shorts, looking annoyingly relaxed and handsome in the morning sunlight. His eyes immediately found yours, a small playing on his lips. “Hey,” he said softly. “You two ready?”

“Daddy!” Hannah launched herself at him. Robby scooped her up effortlessly, kissing her cheek as she wrapped her arms around his neck. “Hi, my little mermaid. You got all your stuff?” He glanced over her head at you. “Need help with the bags?"

“I’ve got them,” you said, a little more curtly than you intended. 

The drive to the airport was filled with Hannah’s nonstop chatter from the backseat. She pointed out every car, every cloud, every sign, asking a thousand questions about the plane, the ocean, and whether there would be dolphins. Robby answered every single one with patience, occasionally glancing at you in the passenger seat. You kept your eyes on the road, trying not to think too hard about how domestic this all felt. 

At the airport, Robby handled check-in, and when the agent handed over the boarding passes, you caught a glimpse of them and froze. Business class.

You turned to him slowly as they walked toward security. “Seriously, Robby? It’s a four-hour flight. We could’ve flown economy like normal people.”

He shrugged, a smirk tugging at his mouth. “I had miles on my card for an upgrade. Didn’t cost anything extra.”

You narrowed your eyes. “Robby.”

He leaned in slightly, keeping his voice low so Hannah wouldn’t hear. “Forgive me. I just wanted to spoil my family a little.”

“We’re not a family,” you said firmly, glancing ahead at Hannah skipping between you two. Robby didn’t argue, he just gave you a look that said he disagreed but wasn’t going to push. 

The flight itself was smoother than you expected. In business class, the seats were wide and comfortable. You both let Hannah had the window seat, ans she spent most of the flight pressed against the glass, watching the clouds and looking at the ocean. Robby sat in the middle, keeping Hannah entertained with the in-flight entertainment and snacks.

You tried to read, but your mind kept wandering, every time Robby’s arm brushed yours, reaching for something, or when he laughed at one of Hannah’s excited comments, memories flooded your mind back, and you had to constantly remind yourself the only reason you were doing this was because Hannah had asked.

You landed in Cancun four hours later. A private transfer waited for you outside arrivals. The driver loaded your bags while Hannah bounced between you and Robby, holding both your hands. The drive to the resort took about forty-five minutes along the coast. You watched the palm trees that lined the road and the turquoise water on one side. Hannah pressed her face to the window the entire time, gasping at every new sight.

When the resort finally came into view, it was even more beautiful than the pictures. A luxurious property with white buildings, infinity pools cascading toward the ocean, and tropical gardens everywhere. 

The humid air of Cancun wrapped around you the moment you stepped out of the transfer van. The resort lobby was stunning with high ceilings, white marble floors and massive floral arrangements. Hannah’s hand was firmly in yours, her fingers squeezing with excitement as her eyes darted everywhere at once. “Mommy, look! There’s a fountain! And flowers! And the ocean is right there!”

Robby walked a few steps ahead, carrying Hannah’s pink suitcase in one hand and his own duffel in the other. He looked completely at ease, the fabric of his shirt slightly damp from the humidity and clinging just enough to show the lines of his shoulders. He glanced back at you with a reassuring smile before heading straight to the reception desk. You stayed back with Hannah, letting her point out every detail she noticed.

A few minutes later, Robby returned, twirling a key card between his fingers. “All set. We’re in the beachfront wing. Follow me.”

The walk to the room was beautiful but felt endless. Hannah skipped between you and Robby, holding both your hands and swinging them as she chattered nonstop about building the biggest sandcastle in the world. 

Robby finally stopped in front of a beautiful wooden door, he swiped the key card, and the door clicked open. The suite was breathtaking, with floor-to-ceiling sliding glass doors that opened onto a wide private balcony overlooking the ocean. The living area had elegant white furniture, and as you stepped further inside, your eyes landed on the bedroom area with two queen-size beds.

You stopped dead in the doorway. “Where’s the other room?” you asked slowly, worried you already knew the answer Robby was about to give you.

Robby set the suitcases down and scratched the back of his head, looking mildly sheepish. “Yeah… so there was a mix-up at the front desk. We only got one room.”

You stared at him with disbelief. “What? Are you serious right now?” The asshole had to be kidding. But then again, this was Robby, and this was exactly the kind of shenanigans he’d put you through. You should have known he wouldn’t keep his promise to let you do your own thing at the resort, to not act like you were a real family on a family holiday. You had been to hopeful to expect he’d at least wait a little longer before showing his real intentions.

Hannah, completely oblivious to the tension, let out a delighted squeal and immediately launched herself onto the nearest bed, jumping up and down with pure joy. “This one’s mine! No, this one! Look how bouncy it is, Mommy! Daddy, come jump with me!”

You barely heard her, your whole attention was locked on Robby. The family suite was gorgeous, in tasteful neutral tones, with fresh flowers on the nightstands, a bottle of champagne and fruit plate waiting on the table with a welcome note, but none of that mattered. What mattered now was that Robby had not only manipulated you to agree to this trip, but he’d also lied to you.

“Michael, do you think I was born yesterday? You totally did this on purpose. I know it.” 

He held up both hands in a placating gesture, though the corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. “There was a confusion with the booking. I swear. They had us down for a family suite with two queens instead of two separate rooms.”

You crossed your arms, glaring at him. “Go fix it. Right now.”

“I already tried,” he said calmly, stepping closer so Hannah wouldn’t overhear. “They’re completely booked. Peak season, a big wedding happening this week. No other rooms available in the whole resort.”

You let out a frustrated breath, rubbing your temple. “This is not what I agreed to, Robby. Separate rooms. That was the condition. I never would’ve come if—”

“I know,” he interrupted gently. “But it’s just one week. I can take one bed, you and Hannah can take the other. It’s fine.”

“It’s not fine,” you hissed, keeping your voice down as Hannah continued bouncing happily, now unpacking her stuffed capybara and arranging it on the pillows. “This is exactly what I was worried about. You’re pushing boundaries.”

Meanwhile, Hannah had moved on to dragging her suitcase across the room, chattering excitedly. “Mommy, can we go to the beach now? The water is waiting! I want to find seashells and build a castle.”

Robby glanced at her with that fatherly smile that always made your chest ache, then looked back at you. “Look at her. She’s already so happy. One week, that’s all. We’re adults. We can handle sharing space for a few nights without it meaning anything.”

You stared at the two queen beds again. They were large, luxurious, with more pillows than necessary. The balcony doors were open, letting in the warm breeze and the constant, soothing sound of waves. It would have been perfect… if it weren’t for the man standing two feet away looking far too pleased with this “mix-up.”

Hannah suddenly ran over and grabbed your hand, then Robby’s. “Come on! Let’s go to the beach! I’m ready! I have my bucket and everything!”

You looked down at your daughter’s beaming face, then back at Robby. He raised an eyebrow slightly, waiting. You let out a long, defeated sigh. “Fine. But this changes nothing, Robby. Separate beds. No funny business. And the second a room opens up, we’re switching.”

“Whatever you say,” he replied, but the small, satisfied smile on his face told you he wasn’t worried at all.

He set his suitcase near one of the queen beds and nodded toward the bathroom. “I’ll go change first. Won’t be long.”

You nodded silently, still processing everything, but as soon as the bathroom door clicked shut behind him, you turned your attention to Hannah, who was already pulling things out of her pink suitcase with frantic excitement.

“Come here, baby,” you said softly, kneeling on the floor beside her bed. “Let’s get you ready for the beach.”

Hannah stood in front of you, wiggling with impatience as you helped her out of her travel clothes. You carefully slipped her into her favorite ruffled swimsuit, bright pink with little white flowers, adjusting the straps and smoothing the fabric over her tummy. Then came the sunscreen. You squeezed a generous amount into your palm and rubbed it slowly over her arms, shoulders, back, legs, and face, making sure every inch was covred. Hannah giggled when you got to her nose, squirming because of how tickly it was.

“You have to stay safe from the sun, okay?” you murmured, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “We’re going to have so much fun, but Mommy doesn’t want you to get burned like a toast.”

“I won’t!” she promised solemnly, then immediately went back to bouncing on her toes. “Can I wear my new sunglasses? And my hat with the flowers?”

The bathroom door opened, and Robby stepped out, for a moment, time seemed to slow. He wore dark swim trunks, paired with a simple white shirt that he hadn’t bothered to put on yet,  it was slung over his shoulder. You had seen his bare body no more than a month ago, you’d been under it, but it still felt, somehow, like seeing him again for the first time.

You stared at him longer than you should have. His soft but solid tummy that drove you insane, and that familiar trail of dark hair across his chest that you had always, always loved running your fingers through.

Your eyes traced the lines of his chest, the way the hair curled slightly, the soft give of his stomach. Heat flushed up your neck because God, you still loved every inch of him. 

Robby caught you looking and a knowing smile spread across his face. “What?” he asked teasingly. “I got something on my face?”

You blinked hard, tearing your gaze away. “No,” you muttered, grabbing your own beach bag a little too quickly. “I’m… going to change.”

You escaped into the bathroom, closing the door firmly behind you. The mirror showed your flushed cheeks, and you took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. This was just a week, you could handle this. Just a week of sleeping in the same room, just a week of seeing his body, just a week of him deliberately trying to break down our walls.

You changed into one of the bikinis you’d packed, a simple black two-piece that tied at the sides and back. You liked how it looked on you, it was flattering, but as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you felt suddenly, acutely aware of how little it covered. Your body had changed since having Hannah, a few stretch marks here and there, breasts that were fuller but not as perky as before. Standing here in just this tiny bikini, knowing Robby was right outside… it felt vulnerable.

You adjusted the ties one more time, took another steadying breath, and stepped out of the bathroom. Hannah immediately squealed. “Mommy, you look so pretty!” She ran over and hugged your legs before darting into the bathroom herself to grab her sunglasses and sun hat. “I’ll be right back!”

You stood in the middle of the suite, adjusting the strap of your beach bag, when Robby stepped in from the balcony. He had been leaning on the railing, looking out at the ocean, but the moment he turned and saw you, he stopped dead. His eyes widened, and he dramatically clutched his chest with one hand, staggering back a step like he was having a heart attack.

 “Jesus Christ,” he breathed, the grin on his face pure mischief. “Warn a guy next time.”

You rolled your eyes, fighting the smile that wanted to break free. “You’re so not funny, Robinavitch.”

You wanted to slap that smug smile right off his face and kiss him senseless at the same time. The two urges warred inside you, because you hated how much his words mattered. How easily he could make you feel like the most beautiful woman who had ever stepped foot on this earth, and how completely you believed him when he said it. He wasn’t just mumbling the words because it felt like something he was supposed to say. No, Robby looked at you like he truly wanted you, like he was dying to get his hands back on your body, to pull you close and remind you exactly how good it used to feel. His gaze lingered, tracing over you in a way that made heat flood your stomach. God, you hated how much you still wanted him to.

He didn’t stop. He kept one hand pressed to his heart, shaking his head slowly as his gaze traveled over you, unashamed, appreciative, and far too warm. “You’re trying to kill me on day one, huh? That bikini… fuck. You look incredible.”

Heat flooded your face again, but you crossed your arms over your chest, suddenly self-conscious. “Stop it. This is exactly what I was worried about.”

Robby took a slow step closer, still smiling, but his voice dropped. “Can’t help it. You’ve always looked good, but seeing you like this…” He let the sentence trail off, his sight lingering on the curve of your waist and the ties at your hips.

Before you could respond, Hannah burst back out of the bathroom wearing her oversized sunglasses and floppy sun hat, striking a dramatic pose. “I’m ready! Let’s go see the ocean!”

The sand was warm under your feet as the three of you made your way down the wooden boardwalk to the private stretch of beach reserved for resort guests. The sea stretched out in front of you, waves lapping against the shore, leaving behind lines of foam. Hannah’s excitement was infectious. She ran ahead a few steps, then back to you and Robby, her little sun hat flopping with every bounce. “The water is so blue! Can we go in right now? Please?”

Robby chuckled, adjusting the beach bag on his shoulder. “Let’s set up first, kiddo. Then we’ll swim.”

You chose three loungers under a large thatched umbrella near the water’s edge. You spread out towels while Robby helped Hannah with her water wings. The resort staff had placed a small cooler with chilled water and fruit beside the chairs, and soft music drifted from speakers along the beach. 

Once everything was settled, Robby stood and offered his hand to Hannah. “Ready, little mermaid?” 

She grabbed his hand with both of hers and tugged him toward the water. You watched them go, settling back into your lounger with the book you’d brought.  The sun felt incredible on your skin, you opened your book, but your eyes kept drifting over the top of the pages. Robby and Hannah waded into the shallow waves. Hannah squealed every time the water touched her legs, clinging to Robby’s hand. He lifted her high when a bigger wave came, spinning her around as she laughed uncontrollably. His swim trunks moved lower on his hips, and it made it impossible for you to focus on your book, every few minutes your gaze wandered back to them. 

After nearly an hour, Hannah came running back to you, dripping wet and beaming. “Mommy! Come build sandcastles with me! Daddy said he’ll watch our stuff.”

You set your book aside and took her hand, walking down to the firmer sand near the waterline. The two of you knelt together, digging with plastic shovels and buckets. Hannah chattered nonstop about her castle needing a moat and a tower for the princess. You helped her pat the walls smooth, adding seashells and bits of coral you found along the shore. The sun warmed your back, and for a while, everything felt simple and perfect,  just you and your daughter creating something together. But you felt Robby’s eyes on you the entire time, when you glanced up, he was sitting on the lounger, with his elbows on his knees, watching with an unreadable expression. 

He didn’t look away when your eyes met, the intensity in his gaze made heat bloom across your skin. Later, when the castle was tall and elaborate, Hannah got a mischievous glint in her eye. “Can we bury Daddy in the sand? Like a mummy?”

Robby, who had joined you, raised an eyebrow. “Oh, I see how it is. Ganging up on me already?”

You smiled despite yourself. “Sounds fair.”

The three of you worked together, slowly covering Robby as he lay back in the sand. Hannah patted sand over his legs with delight, while you worked on his arms and torso. The heavy sand molded around his body as he lay there patiently, occasionally joking with Hannah about becoming a “sand mummy.” Every time your hands brushed his skin while smoothing the sand, a spark jumped between you. He noticed, and you knew he did.

When you finally stepped back, Robby was almost completely buried, only his head and part of his neck visible. Hannah clapped her hands and danced around him. “He looks like a turtle!”

Robby chuckled, trying to move and finding himself well and truly stuck. “Alright, ladies. Fun’s over. Unbury me.”

You exchanged a look with Hannah, a smile spreading across your face. “You know what, Hannah? Don’t you want to go get some ice cream? I saw a stand right by the pools, and since this is all-inclusive, we can have all the ice cream we want.”

Hannah’s eyes lit up like stars. “Yes! Chocolate and strawberry and rainbow sprinkles!”

Robby snapped his head toward you, as much as he could with what little mobility he had left. “Ice cream sounds great. Why don’t you get me out of here and we go there together?”

You crouched down beside him, close enough that your shadow fell over his face. You leaned in until your faces were only inches apart. “This is for booking one room, Michael.”

His eyes widened with outrage. “You wouldn’t—”

You straightened up before he could finish, taking Hannah’s hand. “Come on, baby. Let’s go find that ice cream. Daddy can wait a few more minutes.”

Hannah giggled conspiratorially and waved at Robby. “Bye, Daddy! We’ll bring you some… maybe!”

As the two of you walked away hand-in-hand toward the resort path, Robby’s voice followed you, half-laughing, half-protesting. “This is unfair punishment! Hannah! Come back!”

You didn’t look back, but you couldn’t stop the satisfied smile on your face. For the first time since arriving, you felt like you might actually survive this week, but only if you kept winning the small battles.

The light of late afternoon had softened into the warm pinks and oranges by the time you and Hannah returned to the suite. The scent of ocean salt that clung to your skin and your hair was a wild mess. You both needed showers badly. You helped Hannah first, rinsing the sand from her hair and body. After drying her with one of the oversized white towels, you slipped her into her favorite purple dress and brushed her hair until it was smooth. Your turn came next, you took your time, letting the warm water wash away the salt, sand, and sunscreen. When you emerged wrapped in a towel, Hannah was sitting on one of the queen beds, flipping through a children’s book the resort had left. 

She looked up with a bright smile. “Mommy, I’m so hungry! Can we go eat now?”

“Soon, baby. Let’s wait and see if Daddy gets back so we can all go together.”

You were both dressed and ready when the door to the suite finally opened. Robby stepped inside, still covered head to toe in sand. It clung to his hair, dusted his shoulders and arms, and left visible trails down his legs. His swim trunks looked gritty, and there was sand stuck to the damp skin of his chest and stomach. He looked equal parts ridiculous and defeated. You and Hannah stared for half a second before bursting into laughter. 

Hannah pointed, doubling over on the bed. “Daddy! You’re a sand monster for real!”

Robby closed the door behind him with a dramatic sigh, brushing uselessly at his arms. “It’s not funny,” he grumbled, though the corner of his mouth twitched like he was fighting a smile. “That wasn’t cool at all.”

You tried to stifle your laughter, covering your mouth with one hand. “You deserved that, Michael.”

He shot you a look, narrowing his eyes playfully. “I have sand in places no person should ever have sand. I’m talking places, okay? You left me there all afernoon.”

You raised an eyebrow, still smiling. “Really? The whole afternoon?”

He ran a hand through his hair, sending another shower of sand onto the floor. “Maybe a beach guard eventually helped dig me out. That’s not the point. The point is you two left me there.”

Hannah was still giggling uncontrollably. “Sorry, Daddy. I ate all the ice-cream.”

Robby shook his head, trying to look stern but failing miserably. “Traitors, both of you.” He glanced down at himself again and sighed. “I need a shower. Give me ten minutes and we can head to dinner.”

While Robby disappeared into the bathroom, you and Hannah sat on the edge of the bed, listening to the water run. When Robby finally emerged, he looked refreshed, wearing a clean button-down shirt and shorts. “Ready?” he asked, offering Hannah his hand.

The buffet was everything a resort like this promised, long tables overflowing with fresh seafood, grilled meats, salads, tropical fruits, and many dessert stations. Hannah’s eyes were wide as saucers as she piled her plate high with pasta, shrimp, and fruit, while you and Robby chose more balanced meals. 

You ate slowly, savoring the flavors while Hannah chattered between bites about everything she’d seen that day, occasionally yawning as the long day caught up with her.

After dinner, the walk back to the suite was peaceful, the pathways were lit with lanterns, and the sound of waves grew louder again as you approached the beach wing. Hannah walked between you and Robby, holding both your hands, her steps slowing with tiredness.

Back in the room, the bedtime routine felt strangely intimate. You helped Hannah brush her teeth while Robby turned down the beds. Hannah chose to sleep with you tonight. You tucked her in on the bed closest to the balcony, reading her a short story while Robby dimmed the lights.

Soon, Hannah’s breathing evened out into sleep, her body curled against your side. You lay there in the semi-darkness while Robby settled into the other bed, the sheets rustling as he got comfortable.

“Well, isn’t this nice?” Robby murmured, soft enough not to disturb Hannah’s peaceful sleep. “The three of us here like this… I had a great time today. Even if I spent three hours buried under sand.”

You closed your eyes, trying to ignore the way your treacherous heart agreed with him. It did feel nice, dangerously nice. You’d had so much fun being with him, doing things together like a regular family: building sandcastles, chasing waves, watching Hannah’s delighted squeals. For a few stolen hours, it had felt real. “Tomorrow morning,” you said quietly, despite the ache in your chest, “you’re going to the reception and asking if they have any more rooms available.”

The next morning you woke slowly, Hannah was still curled against your side on the queen bed. Carefully, so as not to wake her, you slipped out of bed. You moved quietly around the room, brushing your teeth, splashing cool water on your face, and running a brush through your hair. You chose a red bikini today, tied the strings and slipped on a light white cover-up. Before leaving, you scribbled a short note and left it on the nightstand: Went for an early walk on the beach to watch the sunrise.

Robby woke later, he spotted the note immediately and read it with a smile. “Mommy went for an early beach walk,” he told Hannah, helping her sit up. “Let’s get ready and surprise her with breakfast on the beach. What do you think?”

Hannah’s face lit up. They took their time, Robby patiently helping her brush her teeth and wash her face. He changed into swim trunks and a loose linen shirt, applied sunscreen to Hannah’s face and arms, and they headed out hand-in-hand, making a quick stop at the breakfast buffet to grab some fresh fruit, croissants, yogurt, and cold water bottles to bring to the beach.

The ocean sparkled brilliantly as he scanned the loungers, looking for you. When he finally spotted you further down the beach, his steps slowed. You were standing near the water’s edge in just the red bikini, the morning light highlighting every curve of your body. You looked relaxed, confident, and breathtakingly beautiful. And you weren’t alone. A tall, ripped guy in his mid-to-late twenties stood close to you, shirtless, his sculpted abs and broad shoulders glistening slightly with sweat or water. He was laughing at something you said, leaning in with confidence, clearly flirting back with you. 

He looked like he belonged on a fitness magazine cover, young, with zero signs of the wear that came from decades of work. An ugly twist of jealousy hit Robby in the chest. But it wasn’t just jealousy, it was insecurity hiding right behind it. This guy was younger, fitter. Probably had endless stamina and no emotional baggage. Robby became acutely aware of his own softer stomach, the gray hairs scattered across his chest, and the wrinkles around his eyes from years of exhaustion. He felt every one of his fifty. years in that moment, standing there holding a plate of fruit and his daughter’s hand.

Hannah tugged excitedly on Robby’s hand. “There’s Mommy! Look, Daddy! She’s over there by the water. Can we go say hi? Please?”

Robby forced a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Yeah, angel. Let’s go.”

They started walking across the warm sand. Robby’s focus narrowed entirely on you and the man standing far too close. As they approached, he heard the guy’s easy laugh again. The young man was animated, gesturing toward the horizon with one muscular arm, clearly in the middle of some charming story. 

“Good morning” Robby said, trying not to sound bothered but doing a terrible job hiding his annoyance. “I see you found company.”

The guy’s gaze flicked from you to Robby, then back to you with mild confusion. “Is that… your father?”

The word landed like a punch, and Robby let out a short and dry laugh, though his jaw tightened painfully. “Her father,” he mumbled on the low. “Cute. No. I’m her husband, as a matter of fact.” His voice didn’t even hesitate over the blatant lie he’d just said.

You laughed, an uncomfortable and forced sound that made Robby’s chest twist. “He’s not my husband,” you corrected quickly. “He’s just… a guy I know from work.”

Robby turned to you slowly, raising one eyebrow raised in disbelief. “A guy you know from work? Excuse me?” The young guy shifted awkwardly on his feet, clearly sensing the sudden thick tension crackling in the air. “I’m the father of her daughter. Michael Robinavitch, nice to meet you.”

The guy’s eyes darted between the three of you, with a confused look across his face as if he couldn’t quite process the sudden shift. Just a couple of minutes earlier he’d been leaning in close, flashing an easy smile and flirting with acute woman at the beach. Now here you were with a man standing possessively close and a little kid next to him. And as if he couldn’t quite believe that Robby, was somehow the father of that kid. “So… you have a daughter? With her?”

Robby kept his tone light for Hannah’s sake, ruffling her hair gently with one hand, but there was an edge underneath his words. “Yes. I got her pregnant. It was a wonderful experience, actually.”

The words came out with a possessive undertone he didn’t even try to hide. What a fucking little prick, Robby thought. He wishes he could pull a woman like you. Sure, the guy might have abs where Robby had a softer belly. Maybe his forehead was smooth, with no lines etched from the pass of time, and his head might still be free of silver hairs. But Robby had pulled you without any of that polished bullshit, and you had always looked at him like he was the most handsome man to ever exist. A little asshole like him wouldn’t have a clue what to do with a woman like you.

You shot Robby a warning glare, a mix of anger and embarrassment. because now you had to explain your awkard family situation to this stranger. “It’s… complicated,” you told the guy, forcing a polite smile that felt brittle on your face. “Really complicated.”

The young man rubbed the back of his neck, his sculpted shoulders tensing visibly. He was clearly uncomfortable now, the easy flirtation from moments ago evaporating. “Yeah… uhh, I think my friends are calling me. Nice to meet you, though.” He gave you one last lingering, appreciative glance before turning and walking away toward a group of guys further down the beach.

The second he was out of earshot, you rounded on Robby, trying to keep your voice low and controlled so Hannah wouldn’t hear, but still with a furious undertone in it. “What the hell was that? You completely ruined it. He was flirting with me, and you had to march over here acting like some possessive caveman. And “her husband” What the hell was that?”

Robby set the beach bag down on the sand a little harder than necessary. “Oh please,” he said, crossing his arms over his chest, the movement highlighting the soft give of his stomach beneath his shirt. “He’s not even your type.”

You stared at him incredulously. “And how exactly would you know what my type is these days, Robby?”

He shrugged, but his eyes were dark with a potent mix of jealousy and insecurity. “Because I know you. That guy? All looks and no substance. Perfect abs and zero idea what real life looks like. You’d be bored in ten minutes.”

The words hung between you. Hannah, sensing the growing tension like children always do, tugged gently on your hand. “Mommy, can we eat breakfast now? I’m hungry.”

You forced a warm smile for her, pushing down the frustration and smoothing her messy brown hair with your fingers. “Of course, sweetheart. Let’s sit down and eat. Daddy brought all your favorites.”

The rest of the morning on the beach passed in silence from your side. You didn’t speak one more word to Robby. Every time he tried to make conversation,offering you some mango, commenting on how beautiful the water looked, asking if you wanted more sunscreen, you answered with short nods or turned your attention to Hannah instead. Robby noticed, and after a while, he stood up slowly, brushing sand from his legs.

“I’m gonna take a walk around the resort for a bit. Give you some space.” He looked at Hannah with a soft smile. “You stay with Mommy, okay, angel? I’ll be back soon.”

Hannah nodded, already busy building another small tower on her sandcastle. Robby lingered for a second longer, resting his eyes on you with something regretful in them, before he turned and walked away down the beach path. You watched his back until he disappeared behind the palm trees.

The hours passed slowly, you played with Hannah in the shallow water, built more sandcastles, applied more sunscreen, and read a few chapters of your book while she napped under the umbrella. But your mind kept replaying the scene with the guy, Robby’s jealous interruption, his possessive words, the way he’d looked at you. It stirred up too many old feelings you didn’t want to examine.

 Part of you enjoyed the attention he gave you, the way Robby got possessive whenever another guy even stepped too close. It felt good to be wanted like that. To see him look at you like he still wanted you to be his and his only, even after all this time, even after everything that had happened between you. It was dangerous, how much you liked it. Because it stirred up the same old feelings, the ones that made it so hard to remember why you kept pushing him away in the first place.

Robby returned a couple of hours later, carrying two fresh iced drinks. He approached cautiously and sat down on the edge of your lounger, close but not touching you. “I know you’re pissed,” he said. “And you have every right to be. I overstepped. I was an asshole back there. Jealous and… yeah. I’m sorry.”

You stayed silent for a long moment, staring out at the turquoise water. “You were. You ruined a nice, harmless conversation.”

Robby nodded, accepting it. “I did.” He paused, then offered one of the iced drinks. “I walked by the spa earlier. They have really good reviews. I thought of getting you a massage as an apology. You deserve to relax after everything… and after dealing with me being an idiot.”

You looked at him then, searching his face. His expression was sincere, the usual cocky edge softened by genuine regret. Part of you wanted to stay mad. The other part, the tired nd overworked resident and mother, desperately wanted that massage. “…Fine,” you said eventually. “But this doesn’t mean I’m not still annoyed.”

“Understood.” He gave you a small smile.

You left Hannah at the resort’s supervised children’s activity center, a beautiful shaded area with crafts, games, and attentive staff. She was thrilled to join the other kids, waving goodbye without a second thought. 

The spa building was serene and even more luxurious than the rest of the resort. Robby stepped up to the elegant reception desk first. You watched him leaning slightly on the polished wood counter, and the woman on the desk checking the screen and nodding. 

After a couple of seconds, Robby came back to you. “Okay, it’s all settled. I’m gonna head back, maybe hit the pool with the bar. Enjoy your massage. You deserve it.”

Before Robby had any time to head to the door, a masseuse in a white uniform approached you both. She offered a welcoming smile. “Okay, beautiful couple, ready for your couple’s massage? We have the ocean-view room prepared with the full aromatherapy package you selected. It’s one of our most popular experiences.”

You froze right there and then, the word “couple” hitting you like cold water. Your stomach tightened instantly, a rush of irritation flooding through you. “Robby,” you said, turning to him. “What the hell did you do now?”

He looked genuinely surprised, his eyes widening as he raised both hands in a surrender gesture. “I swear I don’t know,” he said quickly, sounding sincere for once. “I just booked a regular massage for you. I didn’t say anything about a couple’s anything. I was very clear, one person, one massage.”

The masseuse glanced between the two of you, still smiling politely, completely unfazed by the sudden tension. “It’s our signature couples experience, side-by-side tables, synchronized massage, and a glass of champagne afterward. Very romantic and relaxing. Perfect for reconnecting.”

Before you could refuse, clarify, or even form a full protest, the staff were already guiding you both forward with efficiency. They led you down a quiet, incense-scented hallway that opened into a treatment room. Two massage tables stood side by side in the center, candles flickering all around the room and towels folded neatly.

Your heart was racing now, a mix of irritation at Robby and anticipation because soon he would be shirtless again, lying only a few feet away while you were both having a “couple experience” when all you needed was to be as far away as possible from the concept of you and Robby being a couple. Your brain was already getting all these confused, dangerous feelings after spending so much time together, the laughter, the casual touches, the way the three of you looked like a real family from the outside. The last thing you needed right now was to keep doing couple activities. Every shared dinner, every walk along the beach, only made the line between co-parents. You were supposed to be keeping your distance.

You turned to him. “This is not what I agreed to, Robby.”

He looked almost sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. “I really did just ask for one massage. But… we’re here now. Might as well enjoy it?”

The masseuses were already moving, preparing the oils, laying out fresh towels, adjusting the temperature and lighting.

On of them smiled gently. “If you’d both like to remove your clothes to your comfort level and lie face down on the tables, we’ll begin with the back and shoulders. Take your time.”

Robby glanced at you, reading the hesitation in your posture. He gave a reassuring nod. “I’ll go first,” he said quietly, and stepped behind the simple privacy screen they had provided. 

You heard the rustle of fabric as he removed his shirt and trunks. You turned around quickly, facing the wall to avoid the sight of his fully naked body, one you knew far too well and that still had the exact same devastating effect on you. Definitely not the kind of reaction you needed when you were supposed to be relaxing. But even with your back to him, the knowledge that he was right there in the same room, completely bare, got your heart beating fast. 

When he emerged and lay face down on the right-hand table, he draped the sheet modestly over his lower half. You couldn’t help but notice the familiar lines of his back, his strong shoulders, the soft curve where his waist met his hips. Your turn came next, you stepped behind the screen, your fingers slightly unsteady as you untied the bikini top and stepped out of the bottoms. The cool air kissed your bare skin, you wrapped yourself quickly in one of the large, warmed towels and moved to the left table, lying face down.

You turned your head to the side, away from Robby, trying to steady your breathing. The masseuses worked in sync. Pouring warm oil first, spreading it with their fingers, starting at your shoulders and working downward in long strokes. The pressure was perfect — deep enough to melt the knots from endless shifts, gentle enough to feel indulgent. Beside you, Robby let out a low sound of relief as his own masseuse began. The sound sent an unwelcome shiver down your spine, you knew that voice too well, one you’d heard far too many times.

One of the masseuses, an older woman, spoke softly as she worked on your upper back. “You two make a lovely couple. Have you been together a long time?”

Robby answered before you could explain how you weren’t a couple, you two had ended here after a complicated series of events. “Five years.”

You opened your eyes, staring at the white sheet beneath you. “We’re not really together,” you corrected quietly, the words slipping out before you could stop them. 

Robby let out a soft chuckle from the next table. “It’s more like an on-and-off thing.”

You turned your head slightly toward him, the irritation mixing with the pleasure of the massage, an experience that was supposed to be relaxing, but now was irritating due to Robby’s presence. “It’s mostly off than on, really.”

The younger masseuse working on Robby smiled as she kneaded his shoulders. “Ah, but you are here together now. That counts for something, no?”

The older woman on your side pressed deeper into a knot between your shoulder blades, drawing a quiet sigh from you. “You make a good couple,” she said warmly. “I have seen many couples working here, but not many where the man looks at the woman the way he looks at you. It’s very special.”

You let out a small, skeptical laugh, the sound muffled against the face cradle. “I find that hard to believe.”

Robby’s voice came from beside you. “I look at her like she’s the second most precious thing in this entire world.”

The masseuses both made soft. The younger one asked curiously, “Why second?”

Robby didn’t hesitate. “Becuse the first one is the daughter she gave me five years ago.”

A soft chorus of “Awww” filled the room. You could practically feel the women melting at his words. The older masseuse patted your shoulder gently. “That is beautiful. A man who knows what he has.”

You felt heat rise in your cheeks, a confusing mix of embarrassment, irritation, and something warmer that his words always managed to make you feel. “He’s a flatterer,” you muttered, trying to keep your voice light. “Don’t let him fool you. He’s very good at saying the right things.”

Robby chuckled again. “Only when it’s true.”

The synchronized rhythm of the massage created an oddly intimate atmosphere. When your masseuse dug into a tight knot between your shoulder blades, Robby’s masseuse did the same at the exact same moment. The sensation of feeling your own body release tension while hearing his quiet groans of pleasure made the room feel smaller, more charged. Time stretched. You found yourself relaxing despite everything, the ocean view, the scent of the oils, the pressure, until the masseuse gently asked you to turn over. You hesitated for a second before complying, keeping the sheet carefully draped over your chest as you rolled onto your back. Robby turned at the same moment, and for a brief second, your eyes met across the small space between the tables. His gaze was dark, but you looked away quickly, focusing on the ceiling and the glow of the candles.

The front massage was somehow even more intimate, oil poured across your collarbones, your arms, your legs. The masseuse’s hands worked slowly up your thighs, careful and professional, but the proximity of Robby, who was lying there with his eyes sometimes closed, sometimes open and watching the ceiling, made every touch feel amplified. 

The older masseuse spoke again softly as she massaged your temples. “It is good to see a family taking time together. These moments are precious.”

You stayed silent this time, and Robby’s quiet reply came a moment later. “They are. It took me a while to realize there’s nothing more important than my family.”

When the massage ended, the masseuses quietly stepped out, leaving you and Robby alone in the treatment room. Robes had been provided, and two elegant flutes of champagne with fresh strawberries and raspberries waited on a small table between the two massage tables. You sat up slowly, wrapping the white robe tightly around yourself. Robby did the same on his table, the robe hanging open just enough to show his chest.

For a moment, neither of you spoke, the only sounds were the distant waves. Robby reached for the champagne glasses and handed one to you. He clinked his glass gently against yours.

“To surviving the rest of this trip,” he said softly, a smile playing on his lips.

Robby leaned back against the edge of his table, watching you. The robe slipped slightly off one shoulder, revealing more of his chest. “No matter how much you try to pretend you hate spending time with me… I know you secretly enjoy it. We get along. We have fun together. You know there’s this… connection between us.”

You stared into your glass, watching the bubbles rise. You took a sip before answering. “You’re wrong. The only reason we keep spending time together is because you pull this shit all the time. This wasn’t what I agreed to. I asked for separate rooms, no couple activities. You keep lying to me and manipulating everything because you have this fantasy that I’ll magically get back with you just because you paid for some expensive vacation.”

Robby set his glass down slowly. He didn’t look defensive. Instead, his expression was open, almost vulnerable. “I didn’t get a couple’s massage. I swear. I asked for one massage for you.”

You raised an eyebrow, the champagne making your cheeks feel warmer. “What about the hotel room mix-up?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, a sheepish smile tugging at his mouth. “Maybe… I didn’t correct the receptionist when he gave me only one room.”

You let out a disbelieving laugh, shaking your head. “You’re unbelievable.”

Robby looked at you then. “I’m in love,” he said simply. “Crazy in love with you. And every single day, every second I spend with you it just gets bigger and bigger. I can’t help it.”

The confession hung between you. You wanted to push back, to stay angry, but the massage had stripped away too many defenses. You knew you could pack your suitcase right now. You knew you could call a taxi, get to the airport, and buy the fastest ticket back home. But part of you didn’t. Part of you longed to stay and see what the next thing Robby would do, how far he’d go to win you back, how much he was willing to risk this time, and whether he truly meant it. The worst part of it all was how little you actually wanted to run away from him.

“You can’t deny the massage was nice,” Robby added quietly.

You took another slow sip of champagne. The truth slipped out before you could stop it. “It felt good,” you admitted, barely above a whisper. “Really good.”

The next day you woke to Hannah’s excited bouncing on the bed and Robby’s chuckle from the other side of the room. After a leisurely breakfast on the balcony while watching the ocean, the three of you headed to the resort’s massive water park, full of slides, lazy rivers, and splash zones. Hannah’s eyes were wide with wonder as she ran from one attraction to the next.

You spent hours in the shallow kids’ area first, where sprays of water misted over mushroom fountains. Hannah laughed uncontrollably as she darted through the sprays. Robby lifted her onto his shoulders so she could reach higher sprays, both of them soaked and beaming.

Later, you moved to the lazy river, the three of you floated together on a large raft, the current carrying you under bridges and past waterfalls. Hannah sat between you and Robby, chattering nonstop about the “big slides” she wanted to try next. Robby’s arm rested casually behind you on the raft, occasionally brushing his fingers over your shoulder. 

You braved a few bigger slides with Hannah while Robby waited at the bottom with open arms to catch her. He went down the steeper ones with her, their laughter echoing as they shot out into the splash pool. You watched from the side, smiling despite yourself at how good he was with her, patient and playful.

By late afternoon, you were all tired, but still decided to head to the open-air resort theater for the karaoke night. The tables were arranged in an arc around a central stage. You sat at a table near the front with Hannah comfortably settled on your lap. She wore her favorite sundress, her hair still slightly damp from the evening shower. In her small hands, she held a colorful fruity mocktail with a paper umbrella and a slice of pineapple on the rim. She watched performer after performer take the stage, clapping enthusiastically for every single one, whether they were hilariously off-key or surprisingly talented.

Robby sat right beside you, he had switched to margaritas after dinner and was now on his third or fourth. His cheeks were flushed a warm pink, and his smile came easier, the alcohol had softened the edges that usually existed between you, but you kept your guard firmly in place, hyper-aware of the weight of his arm behind you and the occasional brush of his fingers against your shoulder

The host, a charismatic man stepped up to the microphone scanning the crowd. “Alright, folks, next up we have Michael Robinavitch! Michael, the stage is all yours.”

Your stomach dropped instantly. You froze, asking yourself if you’d heard right, because karaoke was something Robby would never, ever, do. But then again, this wasn’t normal Robby, this was Robby after four margaritas that inhibited any level of self-awareness he had. “Robby… where are you going? What are you doing?”

He stood up with a bright, slightly tipsy smile that lit up his whole face. He leaned down and pressed a quick kiss to the top of Hannah’s head, then straightened. “You’ll see,” he said.

He walked toward the stage with confidence, the stage lights catching on the slight sway in his step from the margaritas. The crowd quieted with anticipation as he took the microphone. For a moment, he just stood there, looking out over the audience, until his eyes found yours across the tables. A heart-stopping smile spread across his face.

“Good evening, everyone,” he began. “My name is Michael Robinavitch.” He scanned the audience again until his gaze locked directly on you. “This song goes out to the love of my life.” He pointed straight at you, and heads turned. Dozens of eyes shifted your way all at once. Heat flooded your face in an instant, a deep and mortifying warmth that burned from your chest all the way to your ears. 

You wanted the sand beneath the theater to open up and swallow you whole. You sank lower in your seat, wishing you could disappear. Robby didn’t stop. “No, not only the love of my life. She’s the woman of my life. She’s the mother of my child. Look at them, aren’t they the most beautiful ladies in the world?”

The crowd let out a collective and heartfelt “Awww.” Some people clapped, a few whistled. Hannah waved happily at her dad from your lap, completely thrilled and oblivious to your embarrassment. “Daddy’s singing for us, Mommy!” she whispered excitedly, bouncing a little.

The opening notes of Aerosmith’s I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing began playing, and Robby’s voice came through the speakers, rough around the edges from the margaritas, but surprisingly in tune despite being a terrible singer. He sang directly to you, keeping his eyes locked on yours the entire time, as if no one else existed.

“I could stay awake just to hear you breathing

Watch you smile while you are sleeping

While you’re far away and dreaming…”

Embarrassment burned through every inch of you. Your cheeks were on fire, and you covered your face with one hand, peeking through your fingers. 

“I could spend my life in this sweet surrender

I could stay lost in this moment forever

Where a moment spent with you is a moment I treasure…”

Hannah bounced happily on your lap, clapping along. “Daddy sounds so good! He’s singing for you, Mommy!”

Robby poured everything into the chorus, his voice rising with emotion, and cracking slightly on the high notes but full of feeling.

“Don't wanna close my eyes

I don't wanna to fall asleep

'Cause I'd miss you baby

And I don't wanna miss a thing…”

He pointed at you and Hannah again during the song, his gaze never wavering. The crowd was completely swept up, some singing along, others watching the three of you with fond, smiling faces. You felt painfully exposed, seen in a way that terrified you, and yet terrifyingly wanted and loved in front of all these strangers. 

When the final notes faded, the audience erupted in loud applause and cheers. He gave a small, humble bow, grinning widely. He didn’t step off the stage immediately, instead, he raised the microphone again. “Thank you,” he said, smiling at the crowd. “I just want to say one more thing before I go. I was an idiot. I did some things I regret. I let fear and work, and my own stubbornness get in the way of the best things in my life.” He looked straight at you. “But this woman right here… and our beautiful daughter… they are the best thing that ever happened to me. All I want is another chance to fix it. To do it right this time.”

The crowd reacted instantly, followed by scattered cheers and shouts of encouragement. Someone near the back yelled, “Give the man another chance!” More voices joined in, “Yeah, go for it!” until it became a playful chant rippling across the theater. 

Robby finally stepped off the stage, making his way back to your table amid the lingering applause. Hannah launched herself into his arms the moment he sat down. “Daddy! You sang so good for Mommy!”

You stared at him, your heart still racing from the public love declaration and the serenade. You leaned in close so only he could hear. “You’re an idiot, Robby.”

He turned to you, so close that the scent of tequila and his cologne wrapped around you again. “Yeah. But I’m your idiot.” 

You wanted to push him away, to stay angry about the public spectacle and the way he kept blurring every boundary. But with Hannah happily chattering between you two about how “Daddy is the best singer ever,” and the crowd still occasionally glancing your way with fond smiles, it was impossible to ignore the pull.

 “Every single word was true.” He brushed your shoulder gently. “I lost so many years, so much time, so many memories I let go because of how I felt, and now the thought of missing one single moment with you kills me. I don’t want to be anywhere you’re not.”

You had to blink back the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. For the first time, you believed every single word that left his lips, no doubting, no second-guessing, no walls left to hide behind. After days of fighting him, of pushing back against every word and lingering touch, all you wanted was to pull him close, to bury your face in his chest and tell him you wanted the same thing. That every second you’d wasted fighting him was a second the two of you could have been together, laughing, touching. “We’ll talk about this tomorrow,” you swallowed. “When you’re not four margaritas in.”

The next morning, you woke before Hannah. You glanced at Robby in the other queen bed. He was still asleep, lying on his back with one arm draped over his stomach, the sheet low on his hips. You moved quietly and sat on the edge of his bed, the mattress dipping slightly under your weight. For a long moment you just watched him, the morning light highlighting the white hair on his jaw and the lines around his eyes. 

Then Robby stirred, fluttering his eyes open slowly, focusing on you with sleepy confusion that quickly shifted into something softer, almost disbelieving. “Am I dreaming?” he murmured as he blinked a few times, pushing himself up on one elbow. “Why are you in bed with me?”

You stayed seated on the edge with your hands in your lap. “Do you remember what happened yesterday?”

He rubbed his face with one hand, still half-asleep. “We went to the water park? Hannah loved the slides…”

“Not that, idiot,” you said quietly, a small smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. “Later. The karaoke.”

Robby froze. His eyes widened as the memories clearly flooded back. He let out a long groan and dropped back onto the pillow, covering his face with both hands. “Oh yeah… Jesus. I can’t believe I did that.”

“I bet you’re regretting it now.”

He lowered his hands slowly. “I might be deeply embarrassed. But I don’t regret it. I wanted to do something romantic for you. Something that showed you how I feel.”

You raised an eyebrow, trying to keep your tone light even as your pulse quickened. “Yeah? Nothing more romantic than singing off-key Aerosmith in front of a hundred strangers.”

Robby chuckled and pushed himself up to sit against the headboard. “Come on, it wasn’t that off-key.” His eyes met yours. “I meant every single word I said. About not wanting to miss another second without you. About you and Hannah being the best things that ever happened to me. About wanting another chance.”

You held his gaze for a long moment, the weight of his words settling heavily in your chest, breaking down your defences more and more each day. “I heard you loud and clear, Robby.”

Hannah stirred slightly in the other bed but didn’t wake. You stood up slowly, smoothing your sleep shirt. “I’m gonna head to the pools for a bit before she wakes up.”

Robby sat up straighter. “You can’t.”

You turned back to him, raising your eyebrow. “Why not?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, looking a little sheepish again. “Yesterday I… booked us dancing lessons on the beach. Salsa. For this morning.”

You stared at him. “And why the hell did you do that? Why didn’t you ask me first? I don’t wanna go.”

He let out a helpless laugh. “I don’t know. I was drunk and thought dancing salsa with you on the beach sounded like a great idea at the time.”

You crossed your arms. “Well, I’m not going.”

“Please go with me,” he said wofter now, almost pleading. He looked at you with those warm brown eyes that had always been able to weaken your resolve. “I’ll behave. I promise. Otherwise I’m gonna have to dance with the teacher, and that would be even more embarrassing than last night.”

You stood there in the quiet morning light, part of you still wanted to say no, to keep the boundaries firm, to protect the distance you’d fought so hard to maintain. But you knew if it wasn’t this, then he’d simply come up with another way of putting the two of you together in another situation. Being with him for these days had softened you more than you cared to admit, it had all worn down your defenses. And after every honest word he’d laid bare last night, combined with the way he was looking at you now with that sheepish, boyish smile and those earnest eyes that always saw straight through you, it made it very hard to keep saying no.

After dropping Hannah off at the resort’s supervised kids’ activities center, where she immediately ran off with a group of children to do crafts and play games, you and Robby walked the shaded pathways toward the beach.

The beach dancing area was set up in a beautiful, semi-private cove framed by gently curving palm trees and large rocks. The instructor, a local man, welcomed you both with open arms. “Perfect timing!. Come, come, partners, face each other. We start with the basic steps.”

Robby was a terrible dancer. He tried, God, he tried so hard, but his movements were initially stiff and awkward, his hips resisting the rhythm. He settled his hands on your bare waist with visible hesitation at first, but that hesitation quickly melted into something much hungrier. 

The first time the instructor called for a basic side step and Robby pulled you in, he pressed his palm firmly against the small of your back, splaying his fingers wide as if he needed to feel as much of you as possible. 

The heat of his touch burned straight through your skin, sending a spark racing up your spine. “Like this?” Robby asked the instructor as he attempted the next step.

His thigh accidentally slid between your legs for balance during a turn, pressing close for a second longer than necessary. You felt the warmth of him, the subtle shift of his hips, and heat pooled in your belly.

The instructor laughed good-naturedly. “Looser hips, my friend! Feel the music. Let it move you.”

Robby tried again, pulling you closer on the next basic. He brushed his chest against yours with every step, the thin fabric of his shirt and your bikini top did nothing to hide the heat of his body.

“This is harder than it looks,” he muttered close to your ear, his breath warm against your neck. He slid his hand a little lower on your back, digging his fingers in with hunger. “But I like having an excuse to hold you like this.”

You swallowed hard, trying to focus on the beat. “You’re terrible at this.”

He grinned as he dipped you slightly on the instructor’s cue. “But I’m trying. For you.” 

His body was pressed flush against yours, his hips rolling in what was supposed to be a salsa step but felt far more intimate. The subtle grind, the way his thigh stayed between yours for balance, the hungry way in which he dropped his to your mouth and lower, to the swell of your breasts, made your skin tingle everywhere he touched. 

Your pulse thundered in your ears, almost drowning out the music. Every turn, every close hold, every time his hands guided your hips, the tension built higher. He traced possessive circles on your lower back with his fingers. When the music slowed for a moment to practice a more sensual move, he looked down at you with heavy-lidded eyes, like he wanted to devour every inch of you right there on the sand in front of everyone.

You couldn’t take it anymore. You’d tried to fight every single advance he’d made since you both arrived. You’d tried to ignore the way he looked, more tan from the sun, those charming freckles scattered across his nose and cheeks, his soft body on full display in nothing but swim trunks. You’d tried to pretend you weren’t affected by the flood of memories rushing back every time he got close, or by the fantasies of what life could look like if you finally let him in. And you were bone-tired of pretending you didn’t want the same thing. Exhausted from denying yourself what your body craved so much, his hands, his mouth, the weight of him pressing you down, the way only he could make you fel.

Mid-step, you grabbed Robby’s hand tightly and started walking, pulling him firmly away from the group and down the beach. The ocean breeze tried cooling the flush on your skin but did nothing to calm the fire in your belly.

Robby stumbled slightly to keep up, surprised but not resisting. “Where are we going?”

You didn’t slow down, already scanning the shoreline ahead. “We’re going to have sex.”

He let out a startled and deep laugh that sent another shiver racing through you. A second later the laugh faded into pure disbelief. “Wait… are you serious?”

You kept walking, your breath coming faster as the arousal intensified with every second that went by without feeling Robby’s touch. “Yes, Michael.”

Robby’s grip on your hand tightened. “Let’s go back to the room then. No risk of anyone seeing—”

“It’s too far,” you cut him off, your voice breathy with need. “And they’re probably cleaning it right now.”

He let out an incredulous laugh, half-aroused, half-amused. “So what? We’re doing it in the wild?”

You glanced back at him, the corner of your mouth twitching despite the heat flooding your body. “Michael, it’s the beach, not the wilderness.”

“Excuse me,” he said, still laughing softly but with clear hunger in his eyes, “But I really like this resort. I don’t want to get banned for life from this chain.”

You stopped for a second, turning to look at him fully. Your voice dropped to a more direct and impatient tone. “You wanna fuck or not?”

His expression shifted instantly, completely undone. “Yes please.”

“Good, then stop complaining.” You kept walking until you found a good spot: a small, semi-secluded cove partially shielded by large rocks and leaning palm trees. The sand here was softer, shaded in patches by the foliage, with a clear but private view of the ocean. You pulled him behind the largest rock formation and Robby followed without hesitation, his hands already sliding to your waist the moment you stopped. The hunger in his touch matched the fire burning in your veins. He pressed you back against the smooth, sun-warmed rock, his body crowding yours, mouth hovering just inches from yours, breath ragged. The tension that had been building since the massage, since the karaoke, since the entire trip finally snapped.

The moment you pulled Robby behind the large, sun-warmed rock, the rest of the world fell away, all that existed was the heat between you, the desperate need that had been simmering since the very beginning of this trip.

You surged forward and kissed him. Robby met you instantly, a hungry sound rumbling in his chest as his hands grabbed your waist, pulling you flush against him. His mouth was hot and demanding, and his fingers dug into your hips with desperation. He kissed you like a man who had been starving ever since the last night you shared together, sweeping his tongue into your mouth, claiming, while he slid one up your back to tangle in your hair, tilting your head exactly how he wanted it.

He broke the kiss just enough to breathe against your lips. “I’ve been dreaming about this. Every single night since we got here. I didn’t think it would actually happen.”

You smiled against his mouth, sliding your hands up his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart under your palms. “All your stupid tricks finally worked.”

He groaned, pressing his forehead to yours as he roamed his hands restlessly over your body, down your sides, cupping your ass, pulling you harder against the growing hardness in his swim trunks. “All I did was to try and prove you how much I love you,” he murmured. “I want to be with you. Not just fuck you again. I want everything. You, Hannah, us as a family. That’s all it’s ever been about.”

Your hand slid down between you, palming the hard and thick outline of his cock through the fabric. He hissed sharply, jerking his hips forward into your touch. “It was torture,” he rasped, against your ear, “seeing you in that bikini every single day and not being able to touch you. Not being able to do this.”

You squeezed him gently, stroking the length of him through his trunks. “Maybe I wanted to touch your body too.”

He let out a shaky laugh that turned into a groan as you rubbed your thumb over the fat head. “I know. I could see the way you watched me. You’re not as subtle as you think you are.”

You couldn’t wait any longer. You hooked your fingers into the waistband of Robby’s swim trunks and pushed them down just enough to free him. His cock sprang out, the thick vein along the underside pulsed visibly as you wrapped your hand around the base, your fingers barely able to close fully around his girth. You stroked him slowly from base to tip, savoring the way he throbbed powerfully in your grip. “It’s your fault for having this fucking body,” you whispered. “It’s just my type.”

Robby let his head fall back against the rock with a moan, bucking his hips into your fist. “I was right,” he managed to say. “That guy the other day at the beach… he wasn’t your type, was he?”

You swept your thumb over the head on every upstroke, spreading the leaking precum and making him even wetter. Robby groaned deeply, jerking forward into your fist as you twisted your wrist just the way he liked, squeezing a little tighter on the way back down. “Please. That guy lacked everything I love in you.”

“Fuck… your hand feels so good,” he rasped. “Been dying to feel you touch me again.” He cursed under his breath, gripping your hip hard enough to leave marks. 

You sank slowly to your knees in the sand, until Robby’s cock stood right in front of you, flushed a deep, needy red at the head and already leaking a steady bead of precum. You looked up at him through your lashes, taking in the sight of him towering above you. 

As you wrapped one hand around the thick base, the heat of him pulsed strongly against your palm, the weight and girth of him making your mouth water. You started slow, torturously slow. Leaning in, you pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the leaking tip, tasting the salty, slightly bitter bead of precum that had gathered there. Robby’s hips jerked forward involuntarily as a whimper escaped from his chest. You kissed it again, slower this time, letting your lips linger as you savored the skin stretched tight over the swollen head. 

Then you dragged your tongue in a wet circle around it, tracing every ridge and vein, feeling the way he twitched and throbbed against your tongue with every pass. “Fuck… baby,” he groaned, already wrecked and sounding hoarse. One of his hands came down to gently grab your hair, trembling slightly as his fingers carded through the strands. “Come on… please… Take a little more, baby.”

You smiled against the slick head, barely parting your lips to take just the tip into the wet heat of your mouth. You sucked gently, swirling your tongue lazily around him, giving him only the lightest, teasing pressure. Robby’s moan was loud and needy, his thighs were trembling as he fought the powerful urge to thrust deeper into your mouth.

You pulled back just enough to speak, brushing your lips still against the glistening tip, a thin string of saliva connecting you. “You’ve been thinking about this the whole trip, haven’t you?” 

Robby closed his eyes for a second and nodded, almost like he was in pain. Then you took him deeper, sucking more of his length into your mouth. You hollowed our cheeks as you worked him with deliberate bobs of your head, savoring every inch. The taste of him, the salty skin that was so uniquely Robby, made you moan around his cock. The vibration drew another loud, desperate whimper from deep in his throat. 

You remembered every little trick he used to love from years ago, the way he liked the flat of your tongue pressing firmly along the sensitive underside, followed immediately by soothing suction, the way you hollowed your cheeks on the upstroke to create that perfect tight pressure. You did them all, eagerly and hungrily, losing yourself in the heavy weight of him on your tongue and the broken, needy sounds he couldn’t hold back no matter how hard he tried.

You slid your free hand between his spread legs, cupping and gently rolling his heavy balls, massaging them with careful pressure. Robby’s head fell back against the rock with a guttural groan that was almost too loud for the public setting. His hips stuttered forward, chasing the wet heat of your mouth as he fought for control.

“God… your mouth,” he panted, forcing his eyes to stay open. He couldn’t stop watching you, the way your lips stretched obscenely around his cock, the spit glistening on your chin and dripping down his shaft, the lust-drunk look in your eyes as you took him deeper with every bob of your head. “I can’t… fuck. You look so fucking good like this, on your knees for me.”

You moaned again around him, and took him as deep as you could, until your nose was brushing the dark, untrimmed hair at his base, holding him there for a long moment while your throat worked around him. You continued playing with his balls, gently tugging and rolling them, feeling them draw up tight as his pleasure built. 

Robby’s whimpers turned into full, unrestrained moans. He tightened his fingers almost painfully in your hair as he began rocking his hips shallowly, fucking your mouth with tiny movements. Spit dripped down your chin, coating your hand as you stroked what your mouth couldn’t reach, twisting your wrist on every upstroke just the way he liked.

You pulled off just enough to gasp for air, strings of thick spit connecting your swollen lips to his throbbing cock. “You gotta be quiet,” you whispered, “if you don’t want to attract an audience.”

Robby let out a shaky laugh that quickly dissolved into another deep moan as you licked a long stripe up the entire underside of his cock, tongue pressing firmly against the thick vein there.

“I can’t… I can’t be quiet when I’m finally feeling your mouth again. Fuck, I’ve missed this so much. Missed you so fucking much.”

You took him back in without warning, sucking harder and faster now. Robby’s moans grew louder, more needy, his body trembling as he fought the edge, his thighs shaking beside your head. “Baby… I’m close,” he warned, stuttering his hips forward. “So fucking close—”

You kept going, eager to push him over the edge, dying to feel his thick load flooding your mouth, but Robby suddenly pulled you off with a desperate groan. He hauled you up to your feet with strength. His cock, slick and throbbing and coated in your spit, pressed against your stomach. “Not yet,” he rasped. “Not like this. I want more. I want all of you.”

With a growl, he spun you around, pressing your front firmly against the rock. Your cheek rested against the stone as he yanked the ties of your bikini bottoms loose with impatient fingers until the fabric slid down your legs and pooled at your ankles. You kicked it aside impatiently, leaving yourself completely bare from the waist down. 

One of Robby’s large hands slid up your body from behind, slipping under the fabric of your bikini top. His palm was hot as it cupped your breast fully, squeezing the soft flesh with blatant hunger. He found your already hard nipple and rolled it slowly between thumb and forefinger, pinching just hard enough to send sparks of pleasure shooting straight down to your dripping core. You gasped, arching your back and pressing your breast harder into his hand, craving more of that delicious sting.

At the same time, he dipped his other hand between your legs from behind, dragging two thick fingers teasingly through your soaked folds, parting them and spreading your slick arousal everywhere. The wetness coated his fingers as he explored you, rubbing up and down your slit before finally finding your puffy clit. He circled it with the pad of his middle finger, pressing it just right, making your thighs tremble and your knees threaten to buckle against the rock. 

“Fuck, you’re soaked,” his voice was rough with lust. “This pussy is dripping for me already. You’ve been aching for my cock, huh?”

You moaned loudly and pushed back against his hand desperately. “Robby… I can’t wait anymore,” you gasped. “I need you inside me. Now. Please.”

He pressed a wet kiss to the back of your neck, grazing your skin with his teeth possessively. “Fuck, yes,” he groaned.

You felt the blunt head of his cock nudge against your entrance, sliding through your slick folds once, twice, teasing you both. Then, with one powerful thrust, he buried himself deep inside you.

The stretch was like something you never felt before, overwhelming and full, exactly what you’d been craving for days. Robby filled you completely, his cock dragged against every spot inside as he bottomed out with a satisfied groan. 

He stayed there for a long moment, buried to the hilt, both of you breathing hard together, his chest pressed flush against your back, one hand still massaging and kneading your breast, the other gripping your hip hard enough to leave marks.

Then he started moving, he was slow at first, giving you deep and rolling thrusts that let you feel every single inch of him. Robby snapped his hips forward deliberately, driving his cock so deep you swore you could feel him in your stomach. The wet sound of skin meeting skin mixed beautifully with the waves and your shared, breathy moans. 

Robby’s grip on your hip tightened as he gradually picked up the pace, fucking you harder, deeper. “God, you feel so fucking good,” he groaned right against your ear. One of his hands left your breast, sliding down your body until it reached your ass. He grabbed a full, greedy handful of the rounded flesh, squeezing hard enough to leave marks as he spread you open wider for him, pulling your cheeks apart so he could watch every inch of his cock as it disappeared inside your greedy pussy. Your arousal coated his shaft, strings of wetness connecting you every time he pulled back, only to slam in deeper. “So tight… so wet for me. Been thinking about this pussy every single day on this trip. You’re creaming all over me, baby. Can you feel how deep I am?”

You moaned loudly, pushing back to meet every powerful thrust. The rock was warm against your front, your breasts kept rubbing against it with every movement. He leaned over you more, changing the angle so he could fuck you even deeper, snapping his hips forward with raw purpose now. “You’re mine,” he growled against your ear. “This pussy is mine. You’re mine. Say it.”

You could only moan in response at first, lost in the overwhelming pleasure. “Y-yours.”

He grabbed your hips with both hands, digging his fingers in hard as he pulled you back onto his cock with every thrust. “Fuck, Robby… harder,” you gasped, still pushing back against him. “Don’t stop.”

“Never,” he growled, slamming into you deeper. “Not gonna stop until you’re coming all over my cock.”

You moaned louder, unable to hold back. Robby’s hand left your hip and slid up your body, pressing two fingers firmly against your lips. “Suck on them,” he growled hotly against your skin. “Before someone hears how well I’m fucking you. Be a good girl for me.”

You parted your lips obediently, taking his fingers deep into your mouth. You sucked on them eagerly, swirling your tongue around the digits just like you had around his cock earlier. Robby groaned deeply at the feeling of your muffled moans against his fingers, his hips slamming into you harder.

With his other hand, Robby found your swollen, aching clit. He pressed his digit firmly against the bundle of nerves, rubbing tight circles with exactly the pressure he knew drove you wild. He alternated between teasing strokes and faster, more insistent ones, never letting the rhythm become predictable. The dual sensation was devastating, not only his cock stretching and pounding into you from behind, but now his fingers working your clit relentlessly. 

“That’s it,” he rasped as he fucked you even deeper. “Suck my fingers while I ruin this pussy. You’re so fucking wet for me. Been thinking of it since the dance lesson, haven’t you? I could feel how soaked you were the whole time I was touching you.”

You moaned around his fingers, the sound vibrating against them as you sucked harder. Your legs shook uncontrollably. “Come for me,” he rubbed your clit faster and harder. “I want to feel you squeezing my cock when you cum. Let me feel how much you need this. How much you’ve been aching for me.”

The tension snapped, your orgasm crashing over you hard and suddenly. You cried out around his fingers, your pussy clenching rhythmically around his thick cock, fluttering and squeezing him tightly as waves of overwhelming pleasure rolled through your entire body. 

Robby’s thrusts grew erratic as he chased his own release. “Fuck… you feel so good when you cum. So tight. I’m so close, baby.” He kept fucking you through your orgasm, drawing it out with deep strokes, his fingers still rubbing your oversensitive clit in gentler circles. His voice was completely wrecked when he spoke again. “Can I finish inside? Please… I need to fill you up. I need to cum inside you.”

You pulled off his fingers just enough to gasp out. “Yes. Cum inside me. Fill me up, Robby. I want it so much.”

That was all he needed. Robby buried himself as deep as possible with a broken moan as he came. You felt every pulse as he emptied himself inside you, hot ropes of cum flooding your pussy in thick spurts. He kept thrusting through it, as if he wanted to push every single drop of his fat load as far inside you as possible. His body trembled against yours as he pressed his forehead to the back of your neck, breathing raggedly against your sweat-slicked skin.

Robby wrapped his arms around you from behind, holding you close as he softened inside you, placing lazy kisses along your shoulder and the back of your neck. His cum slowly leaked down your thigh in sticky trails, mixing with your own wetness. 

Eventually, you shifted, feeling the pleasant ache between your legs and the reality of where you were. You reached down, picked up your discarded bikini bottoms from the sand, and slowly tied them back on with slightly shaky fingers. Robby stayed close, resting his hands on your hips, stroking circles with his thumbs as if he couldn’t bear to stop touching you.

“We should go pick up Hannah,” you said softly, still sounding a little hoarse.

Robby didn’t move right away, he turned you gently to face him, cupping your face with his hands. “Wait,” he murmured. “What does this mean? Just admit it and stop fooling yourself. Tell me you want this as much as I do. That you want to be with me too. That you never minded sharing a room, or getting a couple’s massage, or taking dancing lessons. Tell me you actually like spending time together like this.”

You looked up at him, the vulnerability in his voice made your chest ache, and after an intense orgasm like the one he’d just given you, you couldn’t even fool yourself. You took a slow breath. “Yes… I do,” you admitted. “I like being with you, Robby. I like the sex. I like how you make me laugh. I like talking to you. I like… all of it.” His eyes lit up with hope, but you continued before he could speak. “But what happens with me? What happens with Hannah if you change your mind? If the charm wears off once we’re back home, dealing with real life.”

Robby’s expression turned serious, almost pained. He cupped your face more firmly, brushing your cheeks. “I wouldn’t go through all of this if I weren’t a hundred percent sure of what I feel and what I want. Hannah is the most important thing in my life. I’d die before hurting her. Or you. I’m not going anywhere this time. I promise.”

You searched his eyes, tears pricking at the corners of yours. “How can I believe you?”

He smiled softly, a little sheepish. “I sang in front of a crowd for you. That has to count for something.”

You laughed despite yourself. “This whole trip has been so nice… but real life isn’t a beach resort with massages and dancing lessons.”

Robby pulled you closer, resting his forehead against yours. “I want you when you’re tired from work. Sweaty, your hair a mess, exhausted. I want the long nights when we’re both too drained to speak, and the fights when we’re frustrated and still choose each other every single day. I want all of it.” He kissed you softly, then pulled back just enough to look into your eyes. “Please… I’ve missed so much already, don’t let me miss another thing.”

You smiled, tears slipping freely down your cheeks. You leaned in and kissed him again, slow and deep, full of everything you’d been holding back. When you pulled away, he searched your face with hopeful eyes. “Is that a yes?” he asked, barely above a whisper.

You smiled wider. “It’s a maybe.”

He kissed you again, deeper this time. “Say yes.”

You laughed softly against his lips. “Maybe.”

Another kiss, sweeter. “Yes?”

You melted into him, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Yes.”

Your reblog doesn’t just support me as a writer, it also helps this reach the people who read the first part, so please consider taking 0.00001 second to click that button, it’s free!!💜

A/N: I feel like, the way it happens in a lot of media, second parts are never quite as good as the first one. But people wanted a second part, and I wanted to write one too, so here’s what I came up with. I hope it wasn’t too long or boring. I’m so thankful for all the love and support the first part got. It genuinely makes me so happy to see that people enjoyed it🥹

There’s honestly so much I could write about these two, but it already felt long as it is. I don’t think I’ll write a third part, to be honest.

@blacpiink @fallout-girl219 @tpwklizzie @tlc3802 @findthebeautyinbreakdowns

dividers by: @cafekitsune

[cyberdrream]

hope u guys don’t see me as just a gooner to john price but also, a friend.

[terachu]

“stop sexualizing john price” yeah maybe dont make his character design based off barry fucking sloane then

[staytrueblue]

Hallelujah aymen

[yeyinde]

FATHER FIGURE

JOHN PRICE x READER

18+ | smut. age gap. infidelity/cheating (not between price and mc). power imbalance. corruption/coercion. dubcon. under negotiated kink. price's (very) twisted version of daddy kink. manipulation. grooming. predator/prey dynamics. Dom/sub undertones. painful sex. size difference. alcohol consumption. if anything that flirts a lil too close to noncon fauxcest gives you the ick, then this is probs not the fic for you

The first thing he says to you is:

if you were mine, you'd be tucked in bed already instead of drinking alone in a goddamn bar—

Despite it being the most ostentatious thing anyone has ever said to you, it's full of mockery, too—an infantilising barb drenched in ownership, possession. As if you're a trinket to be kept; a child in need of supervision. A firmer hand, perhaps.

(and those gruff words cause two problems for you: the first is that you're not sure if he means it in a parental way—an innocuous sentiment from an overbearing, but well-intentioned, father angry on your behalf—or a bald, albeit gruff, pickup line from a man with stress lines older than you.

the second is that you're not entirely sure which one you want it to be more.)

AO3.

You know of him, of course. 

It's rare that anyone at your work doesn't know his name by now:

John Price. 

But what you've scraped together is all surface-level wisdom gleaned mostly through sight alone—the way he walks through the resort like he owns it; the broad stretch of his shoulders wading through the crowd, the thick bundle of muscles in his thighs when they flex before he sits at the table unequivocally known as his; the shape of his hands, the dusting of hair on his knuckles, when he grips the tops of his trousers, tugging the fabric taut before he takes his seat—and whispers. Things you pick up like small baubles, little trinkets and shove into your pockets when people talk about him like he's a minor god—half in reverent, the rest in fear. 

(Powerful men just seem to awaken a primordial sense of self-preservation, but considering his penchant for unrelenting submission and an unquestioning respect in almost everyone he meets, their malformed sense of awe and terror makes sense.)

But all of this knowledge comes with the prickling awareness that he isn't the type to waste his day in the bar he finds you in. 

That this, his presence alone, is an anomaly. A burgeoning enigma. 

You've been loitering around enough upscale resorts to recognise patterns. Distinguish habits. And he has been reliably steadfast in that regard—in fact, this is the first time you've seen him shirk his own rules and do something beyond the norm of his constant, unchanging routine. 

He's been part of the upper echelon since he set down in Cape Cod for the season, often found in the exclusive lounge—a place that's restricted to platinum cardholders only (where the annual membership fee costs more than twice your salary alone). You've never had a reason to speak to him, or even an opportunity—not when he's part of the untouchable group that's individually catered to by only the most experienced staff. Hand-picked delegates with their own form of prestige. 

You've been steadily limping through a degree, and picking up odd hours cleaning guests' suites at the local motel when you weren't getting roped into your dad's get rich quick schemes. Spending the bulk of your free time in this empty bar after hours where all the underpaid, overworked employees congregate, and the guests without memberships can get a drink. It's not a lounge. Not even advertised as one. On a map of the manor house turned country club, this place is listed simply as a cocktail bar. Floor-level. Off the shoulder of the entrance and lobby. A stopgap for weary travelers to start spending their money before being sucked into the haze of affluence that never fails to loosen even the most miserly of men's tight fist. 

Simply put: it isn't a place for him. He's not the sort they let loiter in the lobby even if his room isn't ready. No—he’s ushered into a private lounge where he has a personal bartender to cater to his wants as soon as they appear. Being paid just to feed his burgeoning appetite. 

But somehow—

He's here.

Just—standing there. Watching. Taking up too much space in what has slowly become your sanctuary to people-watch and learn secrets about a man you'd never get within five feet of—until now. Until he's glowering at you with an intensity that makes your stomach churn—leaving you feeling like you've been caught doing something wrong. Twisting in shame and embarrassment; whole body tensing up in preparation for a blistering chastisement for your mere existence having the gall to smudge his periphery. 

And he does chastise you. Unmoors the connecting threads keeping you tied to reality with just a handful of words—ones that come with a bite, a pinch of anger, as if the mere idea of you being here was somehow unacceptable to him. 

if you were mine, you'd be tucked in bed already instead of drinking alone in a goddamn bar—

Despite it being the most ostentatious thing anyone has ever said to you, it's full of mockery, too—an infantilising barb drenched in ownership, possession. As if you're a trinket to be kept; a child, one in need of supervision. A firmer hand. 

And it's—

It's strange how easily it disarms you, making you almost breathless from the panoply of emotions running through you all at once—anger at his gall, embarrassment, want (that sticky, awful thing simmering between your hips; a bubbling heat crawling up your throat)—until you're left feeling, speechless and gaping at him, trying to unravel the thread but it's buried under the muck. Hands slipping over the knots you keep trying to untie, dazedly wondering if he means it as it comes out—a disapproving father seeing the smudged shape of his own daughter in you. Angry on your behalf, like a well-intentioned father. Paternal instincts rearing. Or is it a—a wanting thing. Mine, he said. If you were mine… 

Mine—in a fatherly way: anger bracketed inside something innocuous and parental. Pater patriae. Filial piety. You're young enough that you could be his daughter, too. Be the kid he had when he was barely sixteen and just a child himself. Kids raising kids. You can see it lingering in the stress line around his face. The subtle, soft streak of grey at the corner of his mouth, dusting at the arch of his left temple. Feel that fatherly anger like a fist pressing against your navel. Dad-like disappointment—the kind you've only ever known from Disney Channel. 

(words buffeted by a deep sigh. puppy-dog eyes, wide and wet and pleading because dads on television were always softer than velvet, always wrapping up their kids in tight hugs, so free with every single i love you that you'd felt the burn of jealousy when they'd turn around, rolling their eyes. dad, you're embarrassing me—) 

It could be that. Just that. Someone else's dad looking at you and seeing some version of his kid in the way you slouch on the chair, fingers tapping a tuneless rhythm on the old, alcohol-stained wood. A poor imitation of someone who belongs to him echoed back through the lonely reverb of an empty bar. 

Heartaching. Baby, dad is so disappointed in you—

But there's want there, too. A greedy, ugly thing that twists over his expression when he glances at the too short dress you're wearing. The heels that make you feel older, braver, than what you really are. A competent adult who drinks martinis at the bar. Who actually uses the free gym membership and sauna that comes with the privilege of scrubbing tiles for fourteen dollars an hour. Put together in the way that you so obviously aren't. 

The look is hideous, though. Too full of hunger, too red with anger, for it to just be desire. Tangled up between the two; caught alongside need and ire. 

The way men who want things they shouldn't have—and can’t have—sometimes look. Proprietary. Ravenous. Fury darkening along their brow from the denial of what they crave despite it being right there. Theirs for the taking, if only everyone else in the room would look away—

You're not sure which one it is, and it should be obvious. You should know. But there's so much space between those two things—a chasm stretching out in the middle—and you're not sure if he's angry at you for existing, for tempting him, for making him want, and salivate, and grit his teeth to fight the urge to sink them into your skin, branding you for all to see; or for looking like the quixotic image of a daughter, his, and sitting alone in a bar he'd never set foot in willingly. 

Half of you wants him to look and see you. To want you. Your skin, salt-touched and sweat-slicked, under his hands. His for the taking. 

But the other half wonders what it would be like to live out that Disney Channel fantasy where you can roll your eyes, lovingly, at the antics of your dad. Where all of the lines are coloured in with affection and warmth instead of stale cigarettes in an overflowing ashtray and your life shoved inside a tattered old suitcase as your father chases the American dream without ever realising it's a fallacy. One that only exists when he's asleep. 

Home is a motel. It's the back of a 1967 Monte Carlo. It's a trailer park you're too embarrassed to bring your friends to. It's half-remembered birthday dinners and i owe you one’s from the tooth fairy. Your dad buying you a Lilo and Stitch piggybank just to bust it open himself when he needs cash for a pack of cigarettes. Empty beer bottles littering the floor. Tiptoeing around a man's fury. Staring into open windows on your way home and wondering what it'd be like to live with them instead. 

Life is being dragged around to different resorts and five star hotels as he works his charms on the rich, hoping to score business deals and partnerships and investments instead of handouts. It's why you're here, after all. A cover story in case anyone looked too closely at the man who squirms his way inside members only lounges despite not having one of his own. Pyramid schemes where money passes from one hand to the next, and each person skim just that much more off the top. 

You doubt his kids, his daughter, ever had to sleep on a mattress littered with burn holes. 

Envy, you think, is just the ugliest thing—

But it doesn't sit with you for too long before he's sliding into the stool beside you after disassembling your entire being with just a handful of words. Barely even offering a greeting beyond a shallow grunt of acknowledgement, one tightly wound inside the careless effort made to flag down the bartender with a quirk of two, thick fingers.

Says more words to her than he does to you after that, really; rasping out an order for two whiskeys, neat, and promptly waves away your bewildered, half-hearted protests with a growling, low:

“you'll drink what i pay for, sweetheart.”

And you do, of course. 

You drink the whiskey because he said so—commanded, really, in an authoritative bite that cinched around your throat like a collar, adding to the bitter burn of the alcohol searing down your throat before it settles like hot coal in the pit of your stomach. You drink what he places in front you, a wilful adult reduced to little more than a meek, stammering child in the face of waspish authoritarianism, and let him dictate the conversation around who you are, why you're here, stuck in this eighties time capsule moonlighting as a resort—

(and furtively, the pitch in his tenor dipping into an angry little rasp: does the man you came here with know that you're drinking your night away to Labi Siffre's soft croons in a room that reeks of smoke, lemon cleaner, and cheap plastic—)

But despite the prying, intensity of his interrogation, he never once, not even thinly veiled behind a hedging question, asks if you're single. If you're interested in him.

And you suppose that doesn't matter when you've been watching him wander around the resort like he owns it for most of the week, stealing shy, blistering glances at the middle aged Adonis for girls with daddy issues (as your friend calls him; or—like, the modern day Selleck or Reynolds, y'know? a walking, talking sex dream for dumb, needy little losers who need, at minimum, three pills a day just to function—an upper, a downer, and a middle man to keep the room from spinning, y'know?). She says all of this even though there's a ring on his finger—a neat, tidy line of solid gold—and her words are always whispered below the chatter of Mrs Price like it was a faint echo in a crowded cathedral. Heads bowed together, gossiping, as the choir sang. 

It doesn't matter, though.

Not only is he so far above you in social class—separated by tax brackets, credit score, affluence, power and prestige—but he's also older. Much older. A few years older than your father, even. And married.

A married man.

Untouchable.

(if you were mine—)

Or should be, but he's sitting at the bar, nestled in a breath too close, buying drinks for a little slip of a thing, a nothing in terms of social hierarchy, barely on par with the slew of maids he hires to clean his house. A scrap. Spare parts. The ninety-nine percent. Word of the Day calls you and your ilk banausic. Boring.

If the statistics are correct, he can find thousands of yous anywhere he goes—all young, idealistic little things aching for heartbreak and agony after the crash of a life-changing ecstacy—

and that's exactly what he would be to someone like you: a paradigm. misery and euphoria wrapped up in one. the other (blink and you'll miss her) woman that he indulges in (for the weekend), sharing secrets and fantasies and what-ifs that make the ground beneath you tremble from the quiver in his voice.

a neat, tidy little distraction that he'll sever at the root before it can become a problem. a nuisance. 

men like him need someone like you every once in a while because they crave that nuance in their routine, giving life. they need someone who idolises the ground they walk across to reinforce his stature, his life.

like a little fawn wandering up to a hunter clothed in camo, oblivious to the long, thick finger on the trigger, and offers an artless salvation in the middle of the forest. a moment of peace and serenity before he squeezes down and hangs her head on his wall, another trophy he can admire every time he walks into the room: a grand spectacle of conquest and a little death as he regaled the tale of that time a little doe sought him out for comfort,

the dumb fuckin' animal.

and that's what you are;

—a dime a dozen. And probably cheaper by the dozen, too: wholesale discounts, less tedious and time consuming to grab a handful and run than to barter over a single, insignificant grain.

And it's not as if he isn't aware of this. You can see it echoed in the pinch of his mouth beneath all that fur: the way he growls at you, not to you. Expects compliance and respect without giving it out in return. Demands perfection only to delight in watching you fall short of the mark (elbows on the table, slouched posture, common accent: tick, tick, tick)—the reason for the severance, you see; he's not heartless, just pragmatic, and it bleeds into everything he does. Even breaking hearts when he's used up girls like you until they're wrung dry. Nothing left to give except desperation and pity. A mess he leaves behind because he's never, not once, had to clean up after himself. 

Trash for the maid to drag out the back, kicking and screaming but locked behind several non-disclosure agreements, as he ushers in a new, shiny you through the front door.

You always told yourself you wouldn't be that girl: another nameless, faceless entity for his wife to bleed over. For him to forget when he finally exorcises his demons and comes home, begging for forgiveness.

They were nothing, he'll swear, and he'll mean it, too. Nothing at all compared to her, the one he just wasn't ready for.

His children won't ever know your name, but they'll know what you've done. Who you are. What you are. They'll hate you with a quiet, burning passion. The slut who ruined a family: an easy girl who just wanted an easy life. Easy money. The harlot. The whore.

His wife, the Madonna.

You can see it all laid out like a map in your head, each point a new hurt, another moment for you to bleed until you haven't any blood left to give. Wasted on a man who, in three more years, won't even remember your name or what you tasted like or why he wanted you so badly in the first place.

You won't be that woman.

But when his hand drops below the table, and becomes an unseen weight on your skin, a heat burning through the thin fabric of your dress—heavy and firm and full of promises he’s probably the only man you'll ever meet who’ll keep them—you let it stay there for the next three drinks he buys (bought and paid for), and say nothing at all—

—nothing, except okay when he finishes his drink, and jerks his chin towards the door with a gritty, soot-stained, c'mon.

(Because between the harsh cut of his jaw gnashing as he fusses over the lack of good fuckin’ whiskey, you come to the rather quick, mortifying realisation that he thinks you're someone else entirely—Something else, really.)

and at the core of it all, it's a little clichè—

an older man preying on a young, pretty thing who is old enough to know better, but hungry enough not to care.

A punchline to an untold number of jokes—a comedic parable of what happens when men with too much influence fall victim to vapid, empty-headed vixens just coming into the zenith of their sexual awakening. 

Power lies in the split of their thighs, and they'll learn this at the expense of a man who is all too eager to foot the bill. Fresh-faced youth sinking their newly formed adult fangs into the wallet of a man who ought to know better.

The basis of every rich man's dream (and eventual nightmare) because for every rich man, there's always several opportunists looking to find a hole in their ship to fasten their greedy lips to and bleed dry. A leech; a single-minded entity eager to slake their appetite on stolen goods. 

And his just happens to be you: 

the prettiest parasite he'd ever seen, and someone he's all too eager to help break their baby teeth. 

—and utterly untrue;

to you, his money is the least interesting thing about him.

stupid fucking animal, you think, but let him slide his knuckle beneath the strap of your dress, anyway; delighted and sickened by the scrape of rough skin across the soft curve of flesh where your neck slopes into the ledge of your shoulder. Callouses toying close enough to the rabbit-quick jerk of your pulse that you're sure he can feel the tremble of it echo through the crowded cathedral of your skin.

For as much as he seems to think this is commonplace for you, enough not to warrant any significance, you aren't the parasitic distraction he expects you to be.

Maybe the problem with having a leech for a father, a money-sucker trying to blood-let this entire room dry, is that his disgrace is tattooed into your dna. The natural conclusion to the statement of: like father is, irrefutably, like daughter, after all.

Why else would you be dressed the way you were if you weren't looking for a man to suck dry, too? 

But as the dress—a cheap knockoff from Ross that made you look older, more weathered and jaded than what you were—slips from your shoulders, and pools around your ankles, there's no artifice in the tremble of your limbs as you bare yourself to an older man in an empty poolroom.

The scraps at your feet seem to highlight the contrast of what he expected and what you are in an unmistakable, bolded slant. Unmissable, really. And if it wasn't the shake in your fingers that gives you away, or the flash of fear set deep in the canyons of your wide, artless eyes, pupils blown; vacillating between trepidation and terror that isn't man-made, it would be the stark difference in thread count. 

Him, in a tailored suit of warm coffee coloured tweed trousers and a subtle, off-white dress shirt, and Italian leather Oxford's; you, standing partially nude in nothing but a bra and panty set that you snatched off the clearance rack at Marshalls. Laura Ashley. And you mutter a silent hail mary that it isn't the pink and black satin abomination from Juicy Couture.

Under the low light of the pool house, you can see the moment it dawns; realisation cresting through burnt umber. A slight inhale through the thin gap of his parted lips. A flash of teeth as he bites back a snarl, chokes on a ragged growl that brims, brumous, in the back of his throat.

The expectation of an easy lay with an even easier girl fading into consternation, a brief, waylaid contrition over the man he has become, one willing to stand in front of a young woman and brand her, silently, as a whore; then condemnation as the result of his silver-spooned upbringing edges through the guilt.

He sucks in another breath; a seething whisper of air through clenched teeth. The featherlight tickle of his fingers on your skin becomes a shackle. A punishment for not playing your part.

The problem is this:

You're not the only one who has been staring across a crowded room. The moment you caught his eye, he curated a fate for you, a life in whispers. Every moment designed—from a furtive look reaching across the dining room (man in the throes of a midlife crisis coming out in a chuff, the quirk of his lip as if he heard your friend, as if he knows; then: bet he likes to be called daddy), to simmering in your own fantasies as you watched him wander around the golf course. The architect to your fall. 

You're in this world, his world: invitation only, under pretense. Forgery. Your father is rarely good at anything, but the one thing he does excel at is flattery. Bribery. Got his golden ticket through subterfuge, and needed to drag along his daughter as a cover story in case someone examined the cracks in his veneer a little too closely. Friend of a friend, this world is told; the reality, though, is that your father, himself, is a parasite clinging to his richer, more affluent host. 

(Someone you've yet to meet with him squirreling away at odd hours, begging for scraps and handouts and hoping his get rich quick scheme of the hour will work on someone here.)

In the interim, you've been pingponging between stations—sipping free coffee in the tea room, watching grown men squabble over golf, and tally up net worths with your friend in a bitter, scathing game of spot-the-nepo-baby. Having fun on the sidelines while stealing guilty glances at middle age Adonis. 

His jaw tightens with the knowledge that this isn't a burgeoning appetite for richer men slinking out from the cracking facade of your artless tremble, but a blooming unease in gutless pale-pink:

old enough to know better, but curious enough to try—

"Lets take a swim," he grunts, hoarse and charmless. If anything, he seems a little out of his depth. A little shaken, like a naughty child sneaking out of the kitchen with his hands covered in cookie dust.

And then, after a moment, a brief pause, he adds: "sweetheart," but it comes out as a growl. Condemning and wanting all at the same time.

censure for the loss of the should-be whore who enticed a good man from his wife's cold bed; anger at the quivering woman who wants him not for his money, but just to feast on the pale strokes of his design. art in grizzled fur and aged, jaded wisdom. an untouchable man softened by age around his belly and thighs. hunger for food instead of power.

You wonder, then, if he's ever done this before.

This, that is, with someone like you. Insubstantial. Non-transactional. Charity. Desire unfolding, furling open for the idea of who he is, what he represents rather than the number in his bank account.

Inching apart for gruff, authoritative masculinity; a father figure for dumb girls whose dad's never taught them not to wander up to the predator that wants to hang them on a pre-existing hook to gawk at only when impressionable company is over. Aching for discipline despite having done nothing wrong, as if indivisible sins could be stripped away under the firm rap of a rough, worn hand.

Daddy issues—one that comes with shaking limbs and an unfounded, unquenchable need to be freed on their knees; baptised with a collar around their neck, a little chain that says daddy's girl.

It dangles on tenterhooks, the truth of what this is suspended between you like a spun web. A fragile gossamer of silk, easily broken and destroyed with the slightest touch—

And that's what he gives you: touch. His fingers sloping down the shape of your body until he reaches the soft skin of your waist, digging in. A slight pinch, a pressure: a warning and a promise all-in-one. Then his palm falls, glueing to your flesh. The bend of his wrist. His arm slipping around your back, hand anchored on the opposite hip he branded with the bite of his nails. A tug, and you're pressed against his body: cheap polymer sticking to laundered silk. The heaviness of him bleeding through the tweed slacks, nipping at your belly.

His belt is cold against your bare skin, the buckle digging in. He tips his chin when you shiver, and pulls you closer when you try to wiggle away.

"take it off, sweetheart," he commands, but it's spoken like a suggestion. A choice.

He's good at that, you think, numb fingers already wrapped around the expensive cut of leather before you've even made up your mind. But that was always part of the appeal, wasn't it?

The true problem is that you've always been—

Different.

Mercurial, more insightful, well-read people would correct in a whisper, the word accompanied by a nod when you finally break down and confess that sometimes you didn't really know what you were feeling, only that you felt it a lot. Always. An inevitability. There, in the back of your head; an itch you were helpless to scratch. Moods swinging with a high, looping arc that it was difficult to keep up with, to remember which side it fell on. Too much, and always all at once. A constant, insistent pressure. Euphoria to desolation in a fingersnap: a marionette on strings controlled by a hand that wants and yearns and needs and has to have, no matter the cost; and another that fears, that trembles and shakes.

They two united by the collarbones of indecision; choice.

Maybe that's why you were drawn to him.

A man who made choices as easy as breathing, and who often did so for an entire room. Ripping away agency and the ability to pick because in the core of himself, he knows he's always right. Control, a necessary thing; something he has to have, not something he wants. Needs, like oxygen.

And he wasn't wrong when he deduced that you were a parasite—in fact, he was very correct in that regard—but what he failed to realise was that you were the type that ached for an imbalanced symbiosis: the kind that wanted to be necessary to its host. Needed by its host. Predator and prey living in tandem, like a pet frog a tarantula kept in its burrow.

He doesn't give you the respect of autonomy. No—he takes it away. Shapes it in the palm of his hand, and makes you wear the reforged remnants like a collar around your neck. 

Nothing, from the onset, has ever been a choice of yours. He took the seat beside you without asking. Pulled out pieces of yourself without giving you the freedom to hand them over willingly. And now, with his arm around your waist (the plain, gold band glinting in the gauzy ceiling light), he doesn't give you an opportunity to choose.

He simply tightens his arm around you when you strip him of his belt, the trousers slipping down his legs. Leans over you until the wry curls around his chin graze the electrified skin of your temple; murmurs: "hold your breath, darlin'," and then drags you off the ledge and into the deep end.

Under the water, he's nothing but a pale blur above you.

Some god of old in peach-tinged skin; a distorted smear of impartiality and emptiness as the waves lengthen over his image, wobbling the edges until it's a symmetrical mess of flax and wet, raw topaz. His eyes, somehow, are the same dark blue as the waters that press in around you, reshaping the look on his face into something indivisible, unknown. He just—

Stares down, down at his disciple, into the wide-eyed helplessness of your chlorine burnt gaze. Fingers tense around your waist, immovable even as you start to claw at him, legs kicking under the water in a sluggish arc as you fight against the harsh, aching squeeze of your lungs screaming for air.

He doesn't let you up until the fruitless kicking of your legs stops and the strangling hold you have around his neck falls lax. Maybe there's something on your blurred, wave-washed face that convinces him you've had enough, throat aching, taught against a mettle you never wanted to meet, because the harsh grip on you softens, and with his guidance, you begin to float. A submerged buoy coming up on a ragged, choking gasp—his name sputtered out between coughs, and—surreally—laughs.

A hacking, broken giggle.

He indulges you with a low, growling hum. Kicks off against the slimy tiles at the bottom and leans back, letting you come to rest, to float, on the broad, wet spill of his chest. There's something almost tender about the way he wades through the water with you clinging to him, letting you stifle your giggles into the soft padding of his chest, feeling the material of his shirt glue to his skin beneath your mouth, the springy press of thick, matted hair flattened beneath. It's domestic. Parental.

above the water: a father teaching his baby girl how to swim.

below: his cock thickens in his soaked trousers, throbs against the melting, burning split of your thighs bracketed around his hips, his hands gripping the underside tight. the water is cool, but all you can feel is an unbearable heat bubbling between your legs; a white-hot ache that makes you huff and squirm, and hide your shame in the quick thud of his pulse.

It's different from anything you'd ever felt before. The affection, the easy, paternal clutch. The silken, throbbing heat of a man between your thighs—

When your dad taught you how to swim, he did so by tossing you into the deep end without a floaty or a life-vest. Barked at you to stop playing around as you drowned. Dragged you back to the steps of the pool in the motel with his hand clenched around the scruff of your neck before tossing you back in again with a grunting try again.

this is how my dad taught me, he barked when you sobbed, arms thick with baby fat curling around your aching stomach, gagging on pool water and misery. now I know how to swim.

But Price says, go on, jus' like this, and shows you how to slowly cut your limbs through the water with your body safely held against his chest; each stroke easier, more effortless than the last until the gruff words spoken in a vacuum of two bodies overrides the jerky, graceless survival instincts your father awakened in you at the age of four. Held and taught. Praised and acknowledged. The silken good girl brings you back to that day, sitting in the front seat of your dad's Monte Carlo as he grumbled about the clogging, oppressive heat of Florida, and sent wayward, clumsy glances at you at every intersection as your sobs tapered out into sniffles. The stiff, awkwardness of him grunting don't tell the others when he hands you a McDonald's kids meal and lets you eat it at a playground with rusting monkey bars and hardened gum glued to the bottom of the swing seats.

You wonder if he knows, and then more acutely, sharply—how. How would he know. He wasn't there. You've met him, officially, less than four hours ago.

(unofficially—god, get a look at him, hey, look, look, i bet he's fucking loaded—three days ago)

But there's a deliberateness to the way he cuts through the water, offering little praises when your feet kick slowly, matching his pace. A lazy crawl around the pool that is supposed to be closed for the night and inaccessible, but he had a key tucked into his pocket. An inevitability, maybe. Or something preplanned, like he knew your friend would flirt with the cute poolboy today, and take him up on his offer to hang out tonight. That she would shove a dress that barely fits into your arms and pout until you agreed to go for drinks because it's not fair if she's the only one having fun.

a wink, coy and sweet. go on, she urged, slightly mean because she knew how much you hated being alone when your moods dipped this low. maybe you'll get lucky, too.

Lucky. Like your dad and that once in a lifetime invitation to the men's only lounge, smoking cigars and drinking expensive wine and scotch, and gambling away money he didn't have.

It's too much of a coincidence—in both regards—and the pendulum keeps swinging, unsure of which reality is the truth. He gives nothing away, either—even when the odds pile high: remains the perfect image of a man used to getting what he wants, either by his own machinations or the innate injustice of the world falling in his favour once again.

You want to ask, but it sounds crazy no matter which way you shape the question, so you swallow it. Let it burn through your esophagus like the whiskeys he made you drink, the smoke that sticks to his skin when you press your nose into the flesh beneath his jaw, and breathe in the sea-slanted, smoke-cured scent of him. Wood—charred oak and rotting sycamore. Earthy—damp soil; waxy, decaying mushrooms crushed in the meat of your palm. Pine resin. The remnants of wet forest after an autumnal storm. Comforting—like warmed milk and honey. Like stale sweat, ashes; a heavy, warm hand on your forehead breaking through the fever dream when you were eight and sick with chicken pox. Gonna be okay, honey. Canned soup heated over the stovetop in an old, ill-used copper pot. Tinny, like licking your fingers after holding pennies in your fist all day. Sour with sweat.

He smells like home. Like winter nights on a worn couch; Home Alone playing on a grainy television—the red light from the VCR cutting through the dark. Christmas lights the neighbours put up shining through the window and catching on the screen in a smear of red and green and gold. Safe, too; but edged with a veneer of loneliness. Waking up on the couch at midnight to the stutter of the tape rewinding on its own, the moving playing from the beginning again—a Pepsi commercial flickering past as you rub your eyes and peer into the kitchen towards the microwave, trying to read the blurry time stamped in neon red. Alone in the living room, left with just the hum of the refrigerator to fill the silence, and a warm, thick throw tossed over your body.

You're not sure why he brings this strange, childhood melancholy out of you—hazy daydreams; sunbleached polaroids from a time you vaguely remember—but as you dig your fingers into his shoulders, feeling the meat, the muscle tense and release beneath your palms, you're reminded of that lingering yearning for a simpler time; halcyon drenched nostalgia: when everything was both everlasting, neverending, and ephemeral all at once. Time is, somehow, more fluid than the sand you syphoned out of the damp clenched of your palm and into a plastic bottle of safekeeping. A token of each beach he dragged you that you barely remember now. 

In this moment, in his arms: weightless. Featherlight. Everything stripped away, peeling off like layers of old paint until the old wood peeks through. Your problems, your worries, hefted onto the bulk of his shoulders, carried in his arms as he kicks around the pool in lazy arcs; eyes fixed on you in something that's both coddling and possessive. A proud dad, eager to bond with his daughter; a starving man, staring at a feast—

His hands, skin slightly softened from the chlorine and cooled by the pool water, slide up the back of your thighs until the long, sloping ledge of index finger and thumb press against the swell of your ass. He doesn't look away from you as his fingertips dip into the sensitive crease between your inner thigh and the folds of your cunt.

He isn't even touching you, not really, but it quickens your breath into something gasping, needy. Each inhale tinged with the shallow trail of a whine, a whimper; wanting more than the slight grip he has on your ass cheeks, spreading you wide as the waves lap at your clothed skin, thumbs toying with the frayed lace of your cheap panties, tutting under his breath because you should be in silk, baby—

You grind against his soft belly, seeking friction with each clumsy, artless roll; tucking your mewls into his chest as he tightens his hands on your flesh, fingers pressing into fat, into muscle until it aches. But he doesn't do anything. Nothing more than just nudging you along on this stuttering, fever-touched desperation to feel something more than this unbearable emptiness. He holds you open, prying your folds apart through the thin, worn fabric with a grunt, but doesn't touch you more than that even when the mewls turn to whimpers, to pleads. Begging for more as the whine in your voice echoes through the empty room, dancing in tandem to the rough grunts, the splash of water sloshing into the edge of the pool. The slick, sticky sounds of your pussy rubbing into his belly—

"such a needy little thing, aren't you, mm?" He bites the words into your shoulder, tracing the line his knuckles made when he shed the cheap dress from your skin. Gnawing at your skin with blunt, warm teeth.

He turns in the water, one hand sliding up to brace against your spine, the other digging into your thigh; securing you in his hold in a quick, effortless motion that makes your head swim before he tenses, muscles flexing, and then lifts you up out of the water, and onto the cold tile lining the ledge of the pool.

The air is cooler out of the water, away from the warmth of his embrace, and you feel goosebumps prickle along your flesh. A shiver snaking down your spine. But this strange, overwrought feeling has less to do with the cold, you think, and everything to do with the way he looks at you. How he just stops, perched between your spread knees, and just stares. Full of heat, want; hunger. The man devours you with his eyes, flickering from the droplets sliding down from your temple, to the way they rain down off your chin and onto your breasts; to the split of your thighs, drilling into the thatch between them where the gusset of your sodden panties clings to your folds.

But as the man feasts, the father tilts his head to the side, radiating warmth. A pleasant buzz hums down your spine as you take in the look of approval, of pride, that brims in dark blue. Daddy likes the way you look; likes how sweetly you sit for him as he rubs his thumbs into the knobs of your knees, soothing the nerves that bubble as the man eats.

Good girl, the touch says, but the hunger in his eyes flays the skin from your bones; every inch of you feeling more sensitive than it's ever been before, stinging like a sunburn under the heat of his stare.

And it should be empowering, you think, to look down at him like this; but even with the slight difference in height now tipped in your favour, the top of his head comes up to your collarbones. Like this, you feel impossibly small next to him somehow—like a child being held up, gaining height in the arms of a parent. Small, in an insignificant way. A fragile way. This shivering, exposed little thing cradled in his palms; entirely at his mercy, his whims. Playing dress up in adult skin.

His head tilts like he knows the ugly thoughts in your head; can see through the centre of you, cutting through flesh and bone until everything is stripped away. Nothing but sensation in his hands; a thing made of hideous wants and terrible needs—to wrapped tight in daddy's arms, safe and sound; and fucked until you forget your own name.

Shame, desire. The two coalesce in the pit of your belly as his lips twitch into a clandestine smile as he softens the edges of his gaze, pulling back the man until the father remains.

"it's okay, baby—"

But as much as he can sand down the want in his eyes, he can't soften the rasp in his voice, and it catches on the coo, coming out as a low growl. Mangled in the pit of his throat; muscles tensing, unsure, because he's a man who either commands or yells, and it doesn't know how to handle something this soft.

There's an apology in his touch, a gentleness to the way he slides his hands up to the bend of your hips, over the softness of your belly. Soothing a hurt you don't really even feel, but one you know a younger, lonelier version of you would have. Might have pouted, even, with tears in your eyes; too sensitive, too nervous, around men who spend most of their time snarling instead of smiling. Unsure how to handle rejection, disappointment; or a touch that didn't carry a slight bite of pain.

And it's the subtlety of that action, performed without much thought (or too much, rather), that threatens to unmake you. Unravel you at the seams because there's playing pretend in the sanctity of your mind, tucked away inside a secretive, unknown place where no one can see the raw, oozing wound of a broken, lonely child yearning for parental affection, and clutching onto whatever scraps it finds, and—

And this:

"c'mon," he nudges, guiding you the same way he did when he re-taught you how to swim; the innocuous sentiment poisoned by the way his hands curl between your knees, forcing them open wider to fit him as he leans forward, eyes dark, his heavy. Staring at a place the skin he's wearing isn't supposed to peek.

You know the idea behind it. This. The word that shapes itself on your lips, sitting behind your teeth. A different sort of play; new roles shifting in the empty husks the old ones left behind.

But—

Crossing it, in reality, feels so much heavier than it did in your daydreams.

"Price," you start, words edged with a worming, writhing thread of unease. You've never uttered his name before, never tried to break this game of pretend, and his head jerks up sharply in admonishment for bruising the unspoken rules, eyes narrowing into slits, nostrils flaring. A threat: do not enter, do not say more. But your insiding are squirming through the bite of shame and uncertainty, and you suck in a tentative breath, and ease out, on a whisper: "I don't know if—"

The problem, however, is that when you toy with a man who feels more comfortable in a position of unquestionable authority, he'll inevitably just rip the choice from your hands when you refuse to bend to his whims.

Shush, baby, he coos, as soft as he can, but the look in his eyes is mean. "Just lean back for me—”

It isn't a question. He's not asking for permission—he doesn't have to. In his head, it's already a given. Implicit. Nothing he does to you right now would be anything short of consensual. Your acquiescence to this surrendered at the door when he dragged out a key from his pocket, hand low on your back, and nudged you inside. The steps you took over the threshold were all the assent he needed.

You wouldn't be here if you didn't want it.

And it's beyond the parameters of dominance and submission—where there is, always, an unequivocal thread of mutual respect, and negotiations on conduct and rules; setting the stage in partnership, rather than tyranny. Even the designs of free use are mutually agreed upon.

But this, you know, is spitting in the face of all of that.

It's ownership. Possession. He's making decisions for you with the expectation that you'll follow them through without question. Subservient to your King, always.

You think about pulling away from him, closing your legs and keeping him out. Running away—

But that's easier to digest in your head, where he's nothing but an insubstantial figure. In reality—

Price is a big man. Physically imposing. Dominating. Despite the softening of his flesh with age, you felt the undercurrent of muscle beneath the furried body he let you float on. Cling to. The heavy, thick muscles slabbed over his shoulders, his chest. His belly. His thighs. Even now, with his hands sliding off of your body, palms coming to rest on the ledge of the pool as he hangs his head and waits, you can see the shifting of those muscles beneath his soaked skin.

The rise and fall of his barrelled, furry chest both a safe haven and reminder that not only would you easily fit inside his ribs he carved himself open and stuffed you inside, squeezed there against his heart and sticky organs, but he's bigger than in a way you can barely begin to articulate. Physically—a given; but beyond the stretch of his body, the thickened bands of his arms flexing as he waits, a touch impatient, he has years on you. Experience you can't begin to unravel, to understand.

All it took for him to get you to this point, shaking between him, was less than a handful of words—and barely any of them complimentary.

A crook of his fingers. Meagre scraps of his attention. The dissemination of your walls, as easy as peeling paint from trim after it's being soaked in paint-thinner; unveiling the aching, bruised child that yearned, hungered, for something. Comfort in pieces—small morsels to entice your appetite; and now: panting like a dog for more, tongue lolling out to lick the only hand that touched you and didn't hurt—

Easy. Maybe he saw the threads from across the room. The broken, scared little thing playing pretend in adult skin; desperately in need of a guiding hand. Malleable. Pliable. And too socially insignificant to say no and have your refusal stick.

If anything happened, you'd be the whore who lured a good man from his wife's cold bed. A leech. A parasite.

He knew your role from the moment you glanced at him, trying to be coquettish but missing the mark—a coltish, wobbly-kneed doe nuzzling cold metal. Too stupid to see that the object you were seeking comfort from was the barrel of a gun.

Until it was too late.

You swallow, but your throat is dry; skin rubbing together painfully with the motion. The brief hurt, the lingering sting, almost feels like a portend, but you should know better now. It's hindsight—that what you wanted, what you flirted with, and what you get are sometimes mutually exclusive. The man, the father figure. Maybe they can't exist in tandem without one devouring the other.

"Come on," the man barks, impatient now. But the father figure softens his gaze, leans forward to press a chaste kiss to your forehead, breathing in the chlorine and sin that clings to your skin. Mouth warm, beard wet. "Come on, baby," he rasps, and his hand falls to your thigh, nudging. Urging. But it's a farce, this idea of choice, because the man won't take no for an answer and the father would be disappointed if you tried. 

And you lean back when that hand slides from your thigh to your belly, pushing. Insistent. Your palms squelch against the slick tile when you press them down, bracing as your knees spread around the wide stretch of his waist. A loud squeal fills the hushed, reverent silence of the room when he curls his hands under your knees and pulls you forward. Eyes locked, drilling into the cut between your legs as you part slowly for him. For the man, the father you never had—

"god, baby—" he grunts, the words sounding like they were torn out of his throat. Carved from flesh, wet and gutteral, still sticky with blood and spit. "Fuckin'—look at you—"

There's not much to see, not with your thighs this tense and the scrap of cheap fabric covering your cunt, but he doesn't peel his eyes away from you once, devouring the little tease of your flesh moulded to sodden cloth like it was a feast. Gorges himself on it, too; chest heaving, furried beneath the clinging cotton of his shirt, muscles pulling taut. Coiling as he sinks low into the water, now levelled with your knees.

"Go on," he rasps, and that touch of cruelty from before edges into his words like he can't help himself. Lips curling into a snarl beneath damp curls. All tenderness tucked away as the man prowls around you like a stalking bear, huffing, grunting. "Show daddy that sweet little cunt."

You can tell from the wry, almost indulgent lilt that he's tired already of making this same demand, and when you boxes you in, it tastes like finality in the back of your throat. The opportunity to run, to flee, squashed in his paw as he braces against the ledge of the pool, and dives in, head cutting between your thighs, forcing them open wide. There's nowhere to go, and the man is too hungry to listen to reason—

"god—" his nose pushes against the gusset of your panties, and you mewl despite the trembling unease that curdles in your belly. Still unsure if you want this at all; but your head is a separate entity from your body. Reluctance doesn't bubble in your blood when he shifts his hand beneath his chest, and pushes your panties to the side, groaning low and wrecked at the sight of you bared before it. Wet, wanting. You wish it was just pool water, but you know, when he ruts his long, broad nose into the crease of your folds, breathing in deep and ragged, that it isn't. That it's all you. All heat.

(and the furtive, terrible desire to make daddy proud—)

He knows when he tastes you, too. Tongue cutting a long, hot line up your cunt, slick gathered up on the broad, flat spread of it, and rubbed into his teeth, the roof of his mouth. His pretty, baby girl—

Soaked for him.

"m'gonna eat this cunt," he promises, words whispered into your swollen, slick folds. Muffled by the tremble of your thighs. You can't look away from him as he speaks, as he anchors his other hand against your thigh, pushing it open wider for him to fit. The other snaking closer, middle finger slipping between your folds, the back of his hand rubbing against the tile as he teases your slick hole. "And then m'gonna fuck you. Gonna give you the cock you've been achin' for, mm, and you're gonna beg daddy not to cum inside your pussy."

You can see it, too. Him, holding you down—hand against the scruff of your neck as he pounds his cock into your cunt, barely stretched or wet enough to take him without it being a little painful. A constant, dull ache behind your naval as he splits you open on the fat swell of him. A hard, too deep grind that'll leave you sore and bruised for days afterward. His cum, when he yanks your thighs apart and stares down at your battered cunt, will be slightly pink when it spills out of your swollen, stretched hole. The rim inflamed, maybe even torn—

A sick, twisted thing will fix itself in the quirk of his mouth as he coos about daddy making you bleed.

poor little thing, he'll say, and it'll almost sound like contrition but the wicked gleam in his eye will give him away as he watches you stumble out of the room, limping because his cock is too big and it hurt you too much to take him the way you did.

But you will. You'll take whatever he gives you even if it hurts.

And when he laves his tongue over you again, you lean back with a shuddering breath, legs spreading wider, and say,

okay, daddy.

Your friend doesn't say anything when you wander back to bed in the early hours of the morning, unsteady on your feet; dazed and liquid. Wearing nothing but a rich, cable knit sweater that's too expensive, too luxurious, to be yours. Smelling of chlorine and cologne. A slight limp to your gait—beard burn aching between your thighs—as you climb into bed with her on a quiet, fractured exhale.

Her arms loop around your shoulders, pulling you close to her side as she mumbles out a question drenched in sleep about where you've been. 

“Nowhere,” you murmur back, voice scraped out of your throat. “Just—”

“Come on, Dolly,” she huffs into your crown, dredging up that old childhood nickname from when you fought her over an American Girl Doll. Something that changed as you grew, like the stretch marks of your childhood still pasted over your skin. The Dolly Parton to her Kenny Rogers. “Don't lie to me—”

“Just drop it, Ken. I don't—” you can still taste him on your tongue. Feel the warm metal of his ring on your skin when he ran his hand up and down your thighs. Cupped your breast in his palm; the uneven heat of a single line on his knuckle a constant reminder of just how far down you've fallen in a matter of hours. Bent to his whim with a growl, a nudge. Pretty paper crane in his hands; brassbound morality crumpling like a sheet of paper between his worn, rough fist. “I just wanna sleep, I think. I just want—”

She shushes you quietly, whispering out a softened okay that melts into the starchy sheets, and your stomach churns as you wonder what she'd think if she knew. It's one thing to fantasize about a taken man, to make catty remarks about a wife you've never seen before (you're younger and hotter, doll) with a sly, green-eyed glint—a messy fever dream—but another entirely to actually be seduced by a gruff man using little more than a handful of words. 

Barely any effort at all and you went, willingly, despite being so sure you'd never be that person, that girl—

You feel restive despite the exhaustion. Unsettled. Windswept, almost—like you spent all day floating in the sea, your face angled up towards the sun, instead of crying beneath an older man as he fucked you, forcing you to take every fat inch of a cock that was too big for you. 

And maybe the idea of that, of taking a man into your body who doesn't fit, is a little more metaphorical than physical—even though you feel sick to your stomach, nauseous, and your belly aches behind your navel where the head of his cock bullied deep. 

It's guilt, you think—or an abstraction of shame. You weren't supposed to be that woman but all it took was minimal effort from a man you used to dream about as a child until the embers of that adolescent yearning left stretch marks across your shiny, new adult skin. Decades later, and you're still smouldering. Aching. 

The problem is that he didn't treat it like a transaction. Like it wasn't just sex. Something changed after he pulled away, letting his spent cock slowly slip out of your tender, bruised body. Instead of getting dressed, leaving things as they were with perfunctory nod and a goodnight, appetites sated for the moment, he gathered you in his arms, pulled you against his slick, hairy chest, and pressed his mouth to your temple. It was more of an exhale than a kiss, but you felt the brush of his lips, the warm, silky feeling of them sliding along your sweat-slicked skin. Tasting and feeling and just—

Just breathing you in. 

Even when his hand slid down, cupping your wet, sticky sex, it was somehow less intimate than the way he looked down at you, eyes wide open, just taking you in—

And then taking you apart. 

A soft interrogation as he fossicked around your sleepy head, rummaging through the muck until he knew everything—from your first memory, your biggest fear, your happiest moment in life to what your favourite foods and colours were: weaving threads of emotional intimacy (that you liked being held in his arms after sex), physical (you liked when he grazed your slit with his beard and tongue; the dual sensation of rough and soft making you whine), and everything else in between until he had the entire tapestry of your life cradled in the palms of his hands. Silken webs woven under the soft hum of the generator, and filled with the lingering scent of sex and chlorine. In the middle, he started a new anchor point, and let you stitch in pieces of himself in conjunction with your own. Soldered together with parts of two people who couldn't have been more different from each other, but worked in this strange, tentative microcosm knit along the edges of an empty poolroom. 

In the moment, with your head resting against his chest, it was easy to crack yourself open, to let those long-held secrets slip out into balmy air, echoing on the slick, condensation drenched air before dispersing into the steam wafting off the water. Swallowed by the quiet. The trickling drip drip drip of water sliding off your skin and onto the tile. 

Easy. And dangerous.

You consider chalking it all up to happenstance. Sleight of hand: the man hides the father figure in the cuff of his sleeve; makes you call him daddy in the bloom of a pale-blue dawn when no one can see the twisted artifice of taking any scrap of parental affection you can get—even if it comes from the rough slide of a thick cock. A broken adult still clenching around a childhood dream. 

But maybe it should have stayed that way. 

Dreams are, after all, inconsequential in a way real men are not. 

Ken curls her hands into the plush knit of your borrowed sweater, tugging sleepily at the fabric until her head is shoved into your neck; the slope of her nose dragging over your pulse. The flutter of her lashes tickles your skin and you wonder if she can smell it on you. Guilt and sweat. Sex and chlorine. 

It was a mistake, you whisper into her crown, words caught between denial and a plea. It was a mistake and it won't happen again. 

She hums, warm breath ghosting across your jugular in a sweet line. I know, she rasps out groggily, only half awake as you beseech her for forgiveness that isn't hers to give out. Go to sleep.

But when you sleep, you dream. And the problem with dreaming too much is that it becomes difficult to differentiate between fantasy and reality—

Fantasy is tumbling out onto the patio with Ken’s fingers laced between your own; blinking sleep-soaked eyes against the foggy glare of the sun as it smears across a pale blue dawn. 

Everything feels dreamlike: a hazy spill of light; fog thick in the air, dense with humidity. A warm morning—the kind that glues to your skin and causes the heat to bead sweat down your back, your palms; makes everything feel syrupy and intangible. Ephemeral. 

Ken peels her sticky, warm fingers away from your hand, glancing eagerly towards the pool house where the man she disappeared with last night lingers in the doorway, a long, blue net clasped in his hand. He grins wide when he sees her. 

“I'm just gonna go say hi,” she mutters, and huffs at the glance you send her, one laced with askance. “Oh, shut up, dolly. He's cute, okay? And it's harmless.” 

Your room is on the ground floor, perched across from the outdoor pool, and the sprawling valley of green that makes up the first of many golf courses situated on the resort. Ken doesn't bother using the door—she grabs her tote, and slips over the railing with a quick wink in your direction, hastily throwing a quick see you later over her shoulder that melts into the thickening humidity. 

You follow her lead, convincing yourself you're just going to lounge near the pool all morning. And for the most part—it works. There's a stack of magazines on the table beside the lounge chair, and a book someone left behind. 

You don't expect to see him today. The pool is public, and the golf course is beginner level—silver membership—and you spend the morning and most of the afternoon sipping on virgin cocktails, eating sun-warmed fruit, and pretending as though you couldn't still feel him between your thighs, on your skin. Ken shows up for a handful of minutes to check in on you, her eyes bright, slightly flushed with a tinge of warmth that has little to do with the sun, before she darts off again to meet with the pool boy during his breaks. 

And for the most part, it's fine. A neat distraction. But it's between waving off Ken and sinking back into the same stagnant relaxation that he appears, shattering the silly, childish game of pretend that you've been playing with yourself. 

He's dressed for a game, wearing tweed trousers in a shade of off-white and a short-sleeved polo in the same colour—tucked in; cinched with a plain, brown leather belt. 

He looks good. Even better, somehow, in the misty light of a warm, foggy afternoon than he had yesterday under the glow of artificial lights. Almost like he was made for daylight. For soft, warm golds. Sun-touched. 

You pretend you're not staring. Watching him just—

Stare back. 

Intense. All heat. He hasn't looked away once—was watching you before you even noticed him, really. Looking down the length of the pool, eyes shaded beneath the bucket hat he's wearing. Endlessly dark, wanting. 

The look he pins you with is ravenous. Hungrier in the daylight. It's here, in the open, where there's no mistaking what he is, what he wants, and as he tips his head towards the lobby, a pointed look that's more of a summoning, a command, than anything else, you shift in your chair and look away. Pull the book higher up until the words of Coco Mellors drowned out the sight of him limned in the light of the soft yellow sun—

The long, silver club arcs high in the air, cresting over the book you've turned into a shield until it knocks into his shoulder where he lets it rest for a moment. The only thing you can see over the pages and beyond the pale smear of a gauzy blue sky. Tap, tap… 

Your knuckles ache. You're holding the book too tight but you're overcome, suddenly, with the urge to squeeze it tighter. To anchor yourself to something, anything, until he walks away because you feel restless—weightless. As if his presence, that subtle, unshakeable sense of authority, will make you float, obey, whatever command he makes of you. He unmoors you, and you need, above all else, to stay tethered. To stay present. 

Morality is not bendable. It is not fickle. You will not follow him into the shadowed alcoves of the resort, dancing to his whim. Will not let him pretend that he's making a monastery of your body when he advertises it so clearly as a bordello. 

You're stronger than your impulses, than the desire to feel those fingers gliding across your skin again; baptismal and condemning all at once—too much like coming home. Like being found. 

You won't—

You promise yourself, feeling sore and bruised in the lounge chair, that you won't follow him, won't let yourself be corrupted by a fleeting scrap of affection from a man you haven't decided yet which role he's meant to fill. 

But this oath is just a dream. 

The reality is that you find yourself on your hands and knees in a linen closet during breakfast as he brackets himself around your pliable body, and tries to fill the aching hole of a loveless childhood with the thick split of his cock. 

Mouth searing across your nape, whispering the words you wanted to hear your entire life, but they're Frankensteined together with the deplorable filth of a man trying to bully his stupid fat cock into a too tight baby fuck cunt—

(you're so good, sweetheart; takin’ me so well, aren't you? ‘course you are—you can take it, all of it (every fuckin’ inch)—‘cause you're a good girl, you're my good girl; my (tight, wet) baby, aren't you?)

It's still just as painful as it was last night—if not more. An ache deep in the middle of you; a raw, open wound being pried open, sticky with blood and serous. A constant, stabbing hurt—

But it's easy to slip into a dream, to blur the lines of fantasy and reality until it's a muddled mess of melting baby fat and charring bone; to push back into that unrelenting ache, moaning as he grinds his cockhead against a place inside of you that burns like a knife wound. 

so good, you say and maybe you even mean it, too. but it's good the same way swallowing through a sore throat is. ripping a bandaid off. blowing on skinned knees. digging your fingers into your temple to claw apart a headache simmering just behind your brow. a good kind of pain. a soothing sort of hurt. 

good—in an abstract sort of way: (a mother's hand on your forehead when you're sick; a tight hug). 

but he isn't satisfied with halves or quarters. he’s a man with appetite, someone who loves to eat more than anything else. consume without purpose—have just to have. 

his hand is a heavy weight against your nape, fingers tensing into muscle, tendon. squeezing until the air wheezes out on every shallow exhale. each gasping breath he allows you to take is a reminder of how little you matter beyond a plush, soft body and a warm, wet cunt for him to sink into. 

his touch is suffocating. dizzying. a pain you can barely breath around, but to be baptised is to drown—

go on, say it, say it—

you can't. 

“feels so good—”

whatever shame you can abstract from the broken, bruised remains he leaves behind when he finishes with you (daddy, dad, and god leaning back on his haunches; cock softening—wet and sticky—on his thigh, eyes riveted to the tender mess of your ruined cunt leaking the come you begged him not to pour inside) is left on the tile in a smear of pearled pink. 

a mess for someone else to clean.

(And as you stare across the patio, watching two shapes stand close together under an awning—locked in a heated conversation, his hand darting out to grasp her forearm, preventing her from leaving; an abstract shadow of anger (where have you been?) and icy diplomacy (nowhere, love; don't you dare walk away from me)—you come to the slow, stomach churning realisation that this is what you've always been. 

Just someone else's mess. Their problem. A project for them to fix—a broken doll on a shelf, clearance rack discount, and oh, you poor thing. 

All you need is some TLC, they say with a nod, decisive. Wiping the grime from your button-eyes with the sleeve of their shirt. Touch gentle, tender—like you're something precious. Something fragile. Fixable. We can have you looking brand new in no time. 

They promise they'll patch up the holes, the fraying threads, brush off the dust—an easy fix, dolly, don't you worry—but they soon realise the mess is bigger than they expect when they crack you open, unveiling all the rot inside that a simple spit-shine won't fix. 

Staring across the sloping green valley of the golf course to where he pulls a woman who isn't you into his chest to whisper in her ear (there's no one, it's just you), you can imagine how it would unfold so vividly in your mind—

With that pretty gold band on his finger, digging them into your skin, your flesh; wrapping his worn, rough hands around your bones. Cracking your ribs open only to discover that this isn't just playing pretend for you. That the rot is bone deep. Has been metastasizing inside of your marrow for longer than you can remember. 

Peeling his fingers out and finding his skin, that pretty little wedding ring, covered in a thick, putrid ooze; the necrotised slurry of everything you sealed inside. Wiping it off with a grimace, a damning fuck, sweetheart because you were supposed to be an easy fuck and nothing more. Something to lure him away from his wife for the weekend—a pretty, dumb distraction to sink his cock into. Whet his appetite before he went home on Monday and played the dutiful, loyal husband all over again. 

And now you're under his nails. Staining his skin. A liability. 

The men who tried to fix you in the past just handed you the tattered pile of rot and left you to stuff it back inside and sew yourself up. But him—

(he leans down, bringing his lips to her ear: only you, love)

He'll crush the pile under his boot. Have someone else drag you out to the trash, kicking and screaming. Empty, hollowed out. You'll stuff yourself with the money he'll give you for your silence and fill in the cracks with guilt. 

And soon, you'll be back on that shelf waiting for someone else to try next—)

He calls for you again that night, but you don't answer. Leave the summons rotting beside the single red rose he had someone tuck beneath your pillow, and slip down to the bar instead. 

You wash your mouth out with whatever they place in front of you, and pretend you're not pining. That you're not thinking about him all alone in whatever hotel room he bought for the night, sitting on the bed or pacing around the room, smoking cigars, drinking whiskey—waiting for a knock that'll never come. Not anymore. 

Not ever. 

dumb fuckin’ animal, you think, but let a man pull you over to his table where all his friends are sitting, spilling out around empty bottles and the thick stench of cheap cologne, anyway. 

“This is my new friend,” he says with a grin. “She said her name was Dolly. Everyone say hi to Dolly.” 

It's echoed in a slurred chorus of warm beer and scattered shots of rum. They all seem friendly enough—as welcoming as cheap alcohol will allow—but you hesitate, hovering, a touch unsure, at the edge of the table until the man, whose name you don't even know, won't even remember, drops heavily into his seat with a huffing little come on, sit. 

He sends a careless kick against the leg of the chair beside him, and it reels backwards with a loud, sharp squeal into your thighs. 

All you can think, staring down at the polished wood of the seat is that John would have pulled it out with his hands. Left them there, against the back, until you sat down. Tucked you into the table, his chest warm and big and firm against the back of your head. 

have a seat, sweetheart—

The man doesn't say anything like that. Come on, he grunts, sliding a tall, orange coloured drink your way. Have a drink. 

You take the seat. Take the drink. Let him loop his arm around the back of your chair, tugging you closer into his side as his friends laugh over something you can barely make out under the heavy, thrumming pulse of music. 

It makes your head ache, but you smile around the throb of it because this is what you're supposed to do, isn't it? Be the kind of girl who would let his hand slip under the table, and fall on your thigh. Climb higher and higher until he's teased himself into a frenzy of need while you sit there and get talked at, never to. Pretty doll he takes back to his room where you'll go through the motions without a word; laying there, silent and still, and let him fuck you on his bed, feeling nothing at all because you’re just a doll dragged off the shelf for a bit of play—at least until something else snatches his attention, and then you'll be left on the floor. Forgotten. Unwanted. A mess to take out before sunrise, sneaking through the halls wearing the clothes from tonight. 

The feeling of disgust and shame will only choke you when you think about it too much, so shoving it into a box, keeping it stuffed in the back of your closet, is just easier. Then you can chalk it up to a silly girl making a silly mistake. 

It's expected of someone like you, after all. 

To fuck, to get fucked. To take what doesn't belong to you only to be left behind. Watching from the patio as a man and his wife fall back into each other while the ruiner is left, forgotten, on the sidelines. Always the other woman, never the first choice. 

Young and dumb and—

Easy. 

It's what he thought of you, too, isn't it? An easy lay. A simple fuck. Someone he could buy for one night. Poor and cheap and so fucking easy—

He didn't see anything special when he looked at you—just an imaginary price tag he could try and talk you down on. Worth less than the soot beneath his boots. 

Just another lonely, broken thing—the kind of girl men like him could find anywhere they go. Thousands of yous easily becoming notches on his bedpost. 

The whore. Homewrecker—

His hand falls to your thigh, fingers tightening as he leans in—all smiles, too wide and too white—and whispers: “hey, uh, want another drink? I can get you something—”

“—oh, hey—” another voice cuts in, a pale hand falling between you and the face that keeps inching closer, shattering that white, dizzying spell of bad choices and boyish charm. “You're Ken’s friend, aren't you?” 

You've only ever seen him from a distance, but up close, you can see why Ken’s into him. He's cute. Boyishly handsome in a manicured way. 

“Yeah,” you say, pulling back. “I am. Is she—”

Ken appears at his elbow—a flushed, giggling spill of Dolly! that he catches easily with a grin. 

Seeing her feels a little bit like waking up. She's just so—present. Grounding. The sight of her makes you pull that much further away from the guy you just met, sliding to the edge of the chair until his hand slips off of your thigh. 

Ken catches your eye, her brows raising. 

“God,” she says, giggling into his date's shoulder. “Look who just showed up—”

You don't turn because you know. Because you can feel his glare burning into the bare skin of your shoulders where the fabric of the thin, cheap dress doesn't cover. The air is perfumed with the stench of burned flesh—rendered fat, and charring bone—and the earthy scent of burning tobacco. Robust and full—so different from the stale cigarettes that blooms off the skin of the man as he slides his arm around your shoulders, desperate to reel you back into that atmosphere of easiness that permeated from you. An easy lay, quietly slipping away from his grasp as your friend shows up, and her date slides between the two of you, shattering the spell and bringing you back to reality. 

He's not ready to let his conquest go. “Hey, man, we're kinda busy here, so, uh—”

“Yeah,” Ken's date mutters, rolling his eyes. “Gonna be real busy when he decides to come over here—”

“I don't know who—”

Ken reaches out, and the moment she touches you, his words buzz into static, lost under the heavy pulse of music. Her fingers slide down your cheek, touch soft and sweet and grounding. There's no judgment in her eyes when she looks at you—just that same childlike adoration that's reflected back at you each time you stare at yourself in a picture with her. 

“You look thirsty, Dolly. Why don't you go and get a drink, huh? Maybe clear your head.” 

“I'm not really—” you start, but she shakes her head, cutting your protests off with a little pinch to your cheek. 

The meaning is clear enough. She doesn't approve of the guy whose touch you can barely feel as he tries to compete for your attention, fingers grazing the strap of your dress, his voice a distant echo softly calling out dolly, doll, hey, doll like you're a dog he's trying to make come to heel. Her distaste shows in an obvious, sour twist of her lips, her brows raising when you catch her eye, the unspoken really, Dolly an admonishment that makes your cheeks sting as if you've been slapped. 

She doesn't know you fucked him—middle aged Adonis, a living dream for fucked up losers with daddy issues, isn't he, Doll?—and that, to her, sending you over to him, a married man, would just result in harmless flirting (at worst) and a reason to get you away from a guy she heavily disapproves of (at best). She doesn't know that you saw him and his wife together less than a few hours after you took him inside your body, letting him make a home out of your flesh. Adulteress; luring a good man away from his wife.

Or that the only reason you're here is to escape him—

A man who isn't supposed to be here, in his bar. A place he doesn't belong, doesn't fit in. He's supposed to be with his wife, or—

Or picking up a new, shinier you for the night. Anything but standing at the bar, glaring at the hand still sliding over your skin. You can feel it—feel his eyes on you. Drilling into the back of your head, the nape of your neck. A silent command that you feel rather than hear—can sense it like some primordial, instinctual thing. Primal, in a way; a prickle on your skin. A churning in your guts. The silent, authoritative come here without words. A soundless summons that makes you want to roll over, show your belly. Obey. 

A quiet get over here—

And you could ignore it. Could very easily turn around, waving Ken off with a little don't wait up and lean back into the other man's pull of self-mutilation. Catharsis in cleaving off strips of skin; each piece falling to the floor of his hotel room as you undress your flesh so you can douse yourself in shame. Self-immolation with a foreign touch. Fingerprints on your body, inside it, that doesn't belong. 

You can already feel them, too. On your thigh, your shoulder. Beer-warmed breath ghosting over your cheek. Come on, drink up, dolly. 

But as Ken drags her fingers away from your cheek, smudging the imprint left behind—you're so hot, dolly, fuck—you know nothing will hurt you as much as he ever could. 

a man you tore yourself open for. 

“Yeah, you're right,” you say, swallowing down the bitter sting of betrayal when her eyes light up—harmless, she thinks; you'll go and flirt with and admire a married man who won't touch you like the boy beside you, whose fingers are digging into your skin. “I could use a drink.”

Price doesn't take his eyes off of you when you approach and makes no move to meet you halfway—content to have you come to him, but you don't. 

You lean against the ledge of the counter, keeping several, empty stools between the brooding figure consuming the corner and yourself. A measure of safety, maybe; self-preservation. The look on his face is rich with anger—the kind that makes no promises of a quick, sweet death if you come within striking distance. Full of barely leashed fire; a deep, teeth-chattering fury that wilts some of confidence still lingering inside of you, leaving behind the bitter sting of unease as you wonder if coming even this close was a good idea. 

He makes no effort to soften the scorching ire that brackets his expression despite the fact that you—eventually—obeyed his command: little deer venturing guilelessly into the ravenous bear's den. If anything, he seems angrier. 

Even from across the counter, you can see the muscles in his jaw tick when he clenches his teeth. His fists, too, ball up tight. Knuckles blanching when he leans down, bracing on his forearm as he mutters something to the bartender—the only time he pulls that intense glower away from you. 

He's too far away for you to hear the exchange, and more unease prickles along your nape as time continues to stretch, ticking by. Slowly morphing from escapism to compliance to a strange waiting game you can't make sense of, the rules becoming unclear, marred, because you obeyed, didn't you? 

Sort of. 

You keep your eye on him as the bartender pulls away to make what he ordered, taking in the way his eyes narrow when he glances back at you, the anger still potent. Still heady. You can't really understand it, though—approaching a married man who wasn't supposed to even be in this bar was bound to cause whispers. Rumours. Did he really expect you to saunter over to him and play your part in the open like this? To wander up to him, in full view of a crowded bar, and make a spectacle of your broken parts for everyone to gawk at. Debasing yourself just to soothe a bruised ego—

His irritation folds, something else leaking out from the splinter of his churlish ire—amusement over this newfound reticence of yours, undoubtedly—and he shakes his head with a scoff, muttering something under his breath with a wry twitch of his lips. 

You've built yourself around the evolving moods of your father—a fortress to protect against the anger, the irritation, the quicksilver shift between sodden dolor and euphoria, a confluence of malignancy where the bulk of his schemes manifested—but in all that knowledge, in all of that crafting and building, and every safeguard you've made to prepare for each one, the look on Price's face is singularly foreign. Unsettling alien in the way it merges together—some strange amalgamation between anger and malcontent, and a third, implacable mood you've yet to discern. 

Greed, maybe. 

He's looking at you now the way a starving man would look at a feast. Just as hungry, as wanting, as they are overwhelmed with choice. Indecision lingering between that primal urge to devour, to sate themselves. 

Under that stare, the appraisal that seems to dig deep into your marrow until the heart of you is cracked open in his palm, you feel exposed. Raw. Adrift—

John raps his knuckles against the table twice before pushing off. The look on his face makes your belly churn with a deep, unending sense of foreboding as he slinks, quietly, purposefully towards you. It's just your imagination, you think wildly, edged with a touch of unease, hysteria: just your mind playing tricks on you—

But the look on his face is very real. 

The low light of the bar bathes him in heavy shadows that drape over the peaks and high arches of his facial topography, darkening the valleys and canyons that make up the hollow symmetry beneath. Cut lines of leashed fury tucked in the crevasse of an artificial disappointment. A facsimile of discontent, fatherly anger—or rather, a pantomime. A man playing pretend because real or feigned, he knows you'll ache over it, anyway. 

And you do. 

The sting bubbling beneath your skin. Shame blistering. It's unfair, really, that you're this susceptible to manipulation—ruined by a man before you were old enough to understand the consequences of his revolving, intangible presence in your life, and how it would shape you into this needy, quivering thing that burns at the slightest touch from the cookie-cutter shape of a father. 

You want to apologise for transgressions of a married man. Prostrate yourself at his feet until the sunlight catches the band of his ring like a prism, heat melting the metal until it drips down, and sodders your guilt across your flesh. 

He draws closer until his front is inches from your back. Lingering over your shoulder as you curl your fingers around the glass of whiskey the bartender puts down in front of you.

“Don't know what you're gettin’ into,” he draws, words a soft growl in the back of his throat. The sudden clench of his teeth catches most of the fire, but you feel the heat all the same. 

Your heart jumps. You feel it lodged in your throat when you swallow. “What am I getting into, John—”

His hand falls to your hip, the scorching heat of his palm bleeding into the thin fabric of your shawl. Goosebumps prickle along your skin, blooming outward from where he grips you tight. 

“This,” he rumbles, low and deep, fingers cinching tight on your waist like he's allowed. “Don't be coy, sweetheart. You know exactly what you're doing.”

“I don't.”

“No?” 

You want to argue the point suddenly. Defend yourself because none of this was your fault—

But his hand slides down your hip, grip tightening as his fingers begin to pull at the fabric of your dress, bunching it up into the cradle of his palm until your thigh is bared, leaving you exposed. No one can see you with your back turned to the bar, hidden against the counter and the bulk of his body, but fear—a snaking, looping tendril of want—cinches your throat until all you can eke out through the pulse of paranoia and desire is John, please—

His lips graze your nape as he shushes you quietly, unbothered by the panic etching across your face, the hushed pleads for him to stop, just please stop John—all of which he ignores, bringing his other hand up, around your waist, and lowering it until it's tucked neatly between your thighs, sex cupped in his warm palm. 

Your breath comes out in a stutter. 

“Think you do, sweetheart.” His finger grazes over the wet gusset of your panties, drawing a thin line across your clothed slit. “Was it that boy that made you this wet, mm? Got you soakin’ your panties through like this?” 

He presses his teeth into your skin, then, biting down on your flesh as he growls or is it my come leakin’ outta you still, mm? 

“John—”

“Think he'd fuck you like I do?” He hums the words into the indents on your skin, tongue snaking out to lave at the deep wounds. “Hmm? Think he'd be able to give you what you need?”

“He isn't married—” 

He stills behind you, becoming a solid wall of warm flesh and bone, and you want to take the words back. Swallow them down. It's what you should have done—just let them rot in your throat instead of spitting them up because you know your role. You've known it from the start. This—

This changes everything. Shatters the understanding that puddled between the two of you, trickling down from each interaction where he pretended his wife wasn't waiting for him, and you acted as if the ring was just for show. 

John grunts, then, and you feel sick. Nauseous. “I didn't mean—”

He cuts through the deluge of excuses that threaten to pour out of your mouth when he slips his finger beneath the fabric of your panties, and sinks it inside your cunt. “My poor baby,” he's cooing as the walls around you warble, beginning to narrow. “I thought you knew,” he murmurs, and it makes you feel miserable. “Been feelin’ neglected, mm?”

“No, no, I haven't been. I just—”

His finger slowly slides out, leaving you clenching down on nothing. Empty. A pitiful whine slips out before you can clamp your teeth on it. 

“Drink your whiskey, baby—” he lets your dress fall, keeping it held up on his wrist as he reaches for the glass of whiskey the bartender placed down, and brings it to your lips with another coo, another too-rough murmur that burrows deep in your belly. “Go on, love. Drink up—” 

He doesn't give you much of a choice, and you swallow it down, choking on the scorching liquid when he slides his hand over your slit until he's cupping you in his palm again. 

“—Go on,” he urges on a low, charring rasp. “And daddy’ll give you what you need—”

“You can take it.”

The words growled out from between his clenched teeth are meant to be reassuring. And to some capacity, you suppose they are. But they do nothing to soothe the burn, the stretch, of him splitting you apart like this on his cock. 

More’n you can handle, he promised when he shoved you into the washroom of the lobby, and bent you over the sink before dropping to his knees, adding: but this is what my girl needs, isn't it?

And it is. 

All you can do is cling to the dingy sink as he shoves himself up against you, rutting furiously between your thighs. Taking what he has to give like the good girl he promised to make you be. 

And good girls take his cock to the root. 

No exception. 

So, that's exactly what he'll have you do. Willing or not. 

It shouldn't thrill you as much as it does. To be owned, possessed, claimed by a man twice your age (turned forty eight last month so we came here to celebrate, he'd rasped between a generous pull of his cigar, words drenched in nicotine; you'd nodded so hard, your neck started to hurt), but fuck. It does. Pollutes you from the inside out. Fills you with that ugly sort of want. The kind that looks at men who offer platonic, paternal affection and sees an object of desire instead of a patriarchal placemaker. 

It blooms in the hazy drag of alcohol and bad choices; a contact high off of all the cigars he'd smoked since he pulled you down to your knees, and barked at you to get him ready. 

The cigar flashes in the mirror when he takes another drag, ashes falling carelessly over your spine. His personal ashtray to use as he sees fit. It's demeaning. Gross. You arch your back for him, spine locking in a pretty bow so he has a place to keep it all, glued to the sweat that pools in the cradle of your dimples of venus. 

The butt of it wedges between his lips, splitting them wide in a snarl—all teeth gleaming in the low light. Predatory as he takes his fill of vices offered to him on a platter. 

His other hand curls over your hip, fingers digging in hard enough to pop your blood vessels, bruise your bone. Possessive, unyielding. He doesn't have to grab you so hard, but he does. Holds steady, keeping you anchored in place as he feeds you his impossibly thick cock. 

Taking it and admiring seem to be all you can do in his grasp, staring up at the hazy image of his wide hips swallowing you whole with enough room to spare on both sides to fit your fists comfortably on the knobs of his hip bones. His big hand holding you tight. The other one alternates between reaching for the cigar and the whiskey he'd kept on the sink next to the one he has you leaning over.

The thick, coarse hair dusting over his arms; the thatch above is groin that curls over the softness of his stomach. 

He's attractive. Beastly. The sort that reeks of undomesticated man; rancid, heady in the way a grizzly bear smells of rot and the wilderness. Masculine. Not like the boys you're used to. Soft skin. Peach fuzz. Chiselled jaws. Toned. 

No. He's rugged. Animal. 

The thought alone makes your toes curl. 

“Think that boy could be fuckin’ you like this, mm?” 

“N–no—!”

He brings both hands to your waist, cruelly pulling you back into the hard thrust of his hips. It forces the rest of his cock into your cunt, and you keen with the sharp burn of the stretch. A reprimand, you know. He seems like the sort who sometimes confuses affection with pain, moulding it into a multifaceted weapon to suit his needs. 

And right now, it's a punishment. Don't lie. 

Or, rather—tell me what I want to hear, or else. 

“Just you—just you—” you stammer out, barely clinging to the edge of the sink as he wrecks you. Ruins you. You're not used to this. To bring used. Everything in comparison feels so tame, so gentle. The way he takes you apart is new. Daunting. Uncharted territory. 

Thrown around like a ragdoll. A seal in the jowls of a great white. 

“Just me, mm? That why you came here instead of coming to me?”

“It was a mistake,” you slur, dropping your head onto your forearms. “I just needed—I needed—”

He hums low in his throat. “Needed someone to take care’a you, mm? That it?” 

The words are muffled around the cigar when he speaks, the slur in his voice sending shivers down your spine. Heat—white hot, electric—buzzing through your nerves. 

“Yeah—”

“Yes, what?” He corrects you with another sharp rut. The force of his hips slamming into you sounds like a smack. It's pain. Pleasure. The duality knocks something loose inside your head—common sense, maybe. Self-preservation. Whatever it is, was, the absence of it, a stopgap, unleashes the flood keeping you pinned. Docile in his arms.

Untethered, you chase more of that paradoxical painpleasure. Squirming back into the wide bracket of his hips, eyes rolling when his cock bumps into something that makes your cunt clench tight. Belly fluttering. Filling with heat. 

So close, you think. Chanting it in the back of your head as you roll your hips in kittenish gyrations. Head thrown back, eyes flickering up. Pleasure blooming whitehot through you veins—

His hand slides through the ash piling on your spine, glued to your skin with sweat that beads, pooling from exertion. The fever. From the sweat that drips down his brow, falling onto your back. The worn, rough graze of his skin skimming over your flesh makes you whimper, gasping into the cradle of your arms when his fingers reach the curve of your shoulder. He curls them over it, tips catching on your collarbone as he digs in tight. Using it like a ledge to bluntly slam his hips into your ass, balls slapping against your skin. 

Your belly aches. Too full, too much. Too deep. You yelp, jerking your head up, eyes wide, to catch his gaze in the grimy mirror. His mouth is twisted to the side. Displeasure dripping off of his temple. 

You remember yourself, then. Bowing your head in a soft, sinful supplication. 

“Y–yes, daddy—” 

Your demured submission is met with another roll of his hips that grinds his cockhead into your cervix. Tight, bellyaching flits that makes your toes curl. 

It burns. It hurts. But you swallow the whine brimming in the back of your throat because you know he wants it to sting. This is a punishment. Your pleasure is secondary. A fact you're all too cognisant of, but even as an afterthought, it still ruins you. 

“Been cravin’ this, haven't you? Struttin’ around like a bitch in heat. Waiting for someone to snatch you up, mm?” 

“Yes, daddy, yes—” 

He takes his hand off of your hip, pulling it away only to make up for the loss of momentum, control, by digging his fingers sharply into your shoulder, tugging you into each punishing thrust. 

“Gonna give you what you need, love,” he growls, and when he brings his hand back down, you feel the wet butt of his cigar dampen your skin. It rests pinched between his fingers as he ruts into you, and the thought of that—of him holding his cigar and your waist to piston his cock into you, as deeply as he can go, giving up neither—shouldn’t shatter you, but it does. The carelessness of the action, the surety he has that he'll lose neither his nicotine nor you—a mere vessel for him to sink his want into—sends a ripple of pleasure dripping down your spine. 

Being used like this is euphoric. It shouldn't be. The amalgamation of shame, humiliation, and pleasure burn through you. Made worse when he leans down, lets his soft, hairy belly push against your spine, and draws the cigar to your mouth. 

“Open up,” he grunts, pushing the wet butt against your teeth. “Y’gonna hold it f’me. And if you let it drop—” the fingers buried into your shoulder are pried off, his thick, burly forearm shoved under your skin, tucked tight against your neck. Punishing. You can't breathe. Your eyes roll—

But like a good girl, your mouth falls open for him. The cigar is pushed inside. Your jaw clamps shut, teeth digging into the damp paper, tasting the malt sweetness of tobacco. The velvet drag of smokey nicotine. 

Sweat clings to his skin, dampening your temple when he nuzzles his jaw over you, sucking wet, scorching kisses into your jaw. 

“If you let it drop, m’gonna put you over my knee and spank your ass so hard, you won't be able to sit for a week.” 

You whine around the thought of it. His hand on your skin—the sting, the ache. It's not something that ever sounded appealing to you before, but coming from his mouth, the rasping, burrowing words uttered in that deep, fraying tone, are enough to rewire every staunch belief you've ever had until it's putty in his hands. Moldable clay he can build, shape, into whatever image he wants—

—and mould, he does. Twisting you into a receptacle for him to pour his need into; to burrow deep beneath your skin until each breath that trembles out of your heaving lungs is shared. An entity forming, writhing as it takes shape inside the brackets of a condensation-drenched mirror: the beginning and the ending of him cradled around the whole of you, merged into a single, blurry line. He catches sight of it, too; gaze turning molten. Intense. 

Look, he snarls, bending down until the entire stretch of his front is glued to your spine, hand closing over the skin of your nape in a tight, painful squeeze that forces your chin to lift, to watch through lachrymose eyes as the hazy shapes from before transform, painting a picture of primal debauchery. One of a man—indistinguisable from kin or conquerer, man or father—hunched over your body, taking with a force that rattles the porcelain beneath your chest, and punches each noise, every breath, every sound, out of you, these breathless little ah, ah, ah’s that make him answer with a groan, echoing a call back to you. 

You see yourself being taken, being fucked by a man so much bigger than you, so much older and stronger and powerful—from the broad stretch of his shoulders, the soft give in his belly, his wide hips, his thighs, the sheer length of him able to tower above you and cover you from head to toe when he lays his thick, hairy chest across your back. Consuming you utterly. Too big in a way that feels wrong. In a way that itches under your skin. Rubs at your nerves until their raw and chafed and fraying around the edges because he looks so much like a man, like a—

A dad. 

It's the shape of him, maybe. The outline. A hazy image of a man—an authoritative figure hunched over you, uttering raspy praises under his breath, things like good girl and bein’ so good for me, sweetheart. Things that almost sound like good job and i’m so proud of you. Everything that shouldn't be said at the height of intimacy—a dark, swirling ugliness tucked inside brackets, wrapped around parentheses. Unspoken, but there. Present in a way that's unmistakable. Unmissable. 

Look at you, he burrs, bending down to suck biting, painful kisses, nips, over the stretch of your shoulders. Such a pretty little thing f’me, mm. 

Takin’ me so well—

The image in the mirror is catastrophic: lips peeled back in an expression that could just as easily be misconstrued as pain as it could pleasure, teeth sunk into the fleshy give of a cigar still smouldering, still burning in your bruised, sore mouth. A grizzled, barrel-chested beast of a man burring behind you, head hung low as he grips your hips and uses you, battering his cock so deep inside, it aches. 

He isn't soft about it. There's no tenderness in his touch. It's frenzied. Rough. Your reflection blurs with each thrust; the pistoning motion driving you forward several inches until your forehead kisses the glass, just to wrench you back into the wide spread of his chest, his belly sliding over the small of your back. 

This is the definition of being taken. Being used. Fucked. It's hideous. Primal. There's no finesse. No artifice. It's messy, wet. Soaked skin clinging together. Sweat pours from his face, dropping onto your back. His furried thighs stick to the backs of yours, hairs getting tangled in the spill of slick and sweat. It's hot. You feel overheated. Feverish. He’s a furnace behind you, surrounding you. The air is thick, syrupy. Dense with the smell of sweat and skin and sex—

Tobacco. Whiskey. Fig and waterlily. Sun-dried linen. Damp earth. Wet soil. 

It's heady, dizzying. Too much. But he doesn't stop. He doesn't slow. There's nothing sweet in his touch. In the way he grunts above you, growling out wants and desires into your crown, the words mangled in the thick of his throat. Praises that sound too much like scuffing rocks over dried soil, crushing rotting wood in the palm of your hand; gritty—lithic, harsh—to ever be mistaken for sweet nothings or sublime poetry. It's too rough. Knotted with burls and jagged splinters, and full of chatter marks. Cutting, too—

Snarled words forced out between clenched teeth. Look at you, so fuckin’ eager for my cock and pussy was made for me, wasn't it? Ugly, brutal things shaped by the hands of a lapidarian. Good girl, gaggin’ for my cock— 

Polished enough that they cause heat to pool in your belly, but they're porous. Rough. Scraping sharp, chiselled edges along your soft insides until it catches, weeps. A wound leaking shame into the molten pit of pleasure—a euphoria that sometimes makes your breath hitch, like swallowing back a sob. It feels good. It feels so good, but there's a pinch. A pressure. A sting—the pebbled words you gulped down tearing at your flesh, but the heat is hot enough to cauterize the wound, though it leaves behind a scar. Swollen flesh pulsing with shame, tucked behind a wall of make-believe, indifference. Scar tissue. 

Go on, he demands, forearm sliding beneath your chin. Choking. “Go on and come for me—”

Come around my cock—

The thick burl of his arm forces your head up, up, and in the mirror smeared with thick condensation, the true scope of his obsessive need to consume, to devour, you whole sharpens into a dizzying, breathtaking clarity:

the look on his face, in the molten sapphire pools of his lidded eyes, shifts when he looks down at you. staring at your back, your spine, as if you were the hook which he hung the entirety of his pleasure, his absolution, on—the only thing that can slake his substantial appetite. 

It's a terrifying, heart-stopping thought. To be on the receiving end of that paralyzing look is enough to tip you over the edge and into the arms of a release so heavy, so full, it's almost nauseating—

(But nothing compares to when he shifts his grip on your hips, holding steady as he pounds into you, and the moment he rediscovers the ring on his finger is reflected in the mirror. Etched inside the lines of his face, coloured inside the margins, is a breathtaking fury that brims up from the depths, chasing the receding tendrils of an unfettered, underfed devotion—)

despite swell of your release ripping through you—making you clench tight, desperate, around his cock, electrifying every single nerve ending until it's saturated in a molten euphoria, liquid pleasure—every instinct hums to life, buzzing with the unmistakable, atavistic urge to flee, to run from the thing that looks at you and snarls mine—

but,

(his teeth sink into the side of your neck with a growl. fingers digging into your hips, dragging you backwards, back into his cock, his chest. palms stretching wide across your belly when you try to leave, to crawl away from that earth shattering, cataclysmic look—)

“where'd you think you're going?” 

His tone pitches low, sated but not quite full. Still wanting. Possessive. He sucks bruising, blistering kisses across your shoulders, sinking his teeth into the spots the man touched, and growls:

I'm not finished with you yet.

His fingers slide behind your scalp, pulling you up onto your toes and into his chest as he bends down to meet you halfway, lips peppering over your cheeks, your jaw, trailing to the puffy swell of your mouth still wrapped around the cigar. A low good girl, good fuckin’ girl for me slinking out as he slowly peels it from between your teeth, soothing the ache in your jaw with his thumb. 

John's mouth takes its place, his tongue delving between your teeth. A rough, devouring kiss—an eating. Consuming. All teeth and tongue. The sting of his beard on your cheeks, chin. Scraping at your skin until it starts to burn. 

You feel dazed, dizzy. Barely cognisant, barely here; unmoored—as if the ground beneath you has opened wide, forming a chasm under your feet. It's just his touch, his hands that keep you from falling. Hold you steady, suspended in place. 

“Such a good girl,” he grunts, teeth grazing your bottom lip. “Aren't you, mm?”

“J–John—”

“Go on,” he presses, pulling you tighter into his chest, into his hold until you melt into the broad spill of him stretched around you. Floating in the bracket his arms make as he hums low in his throat, timber felling into a smokey, guttural growl, words charred. Dark. “Tell me you're daddy's good girl—”

Ken is asleep when you stumble into the room and there's a sharp, acute sense of deja vu that folds over you at the sight of her on the bed. A yearning that brims up inside of your chest—boneweary; aching—and you almost answer it, follow that familiar, comforting path. A place of sweet succor. Deliriously empty. A sanctuary where you can rest your eyes for a moment, and escape the lingering feeling of being hollowed out. Scorched. 

But you go to the bathroom instead. Turn the shower on as hot as it will go—until the room is cobwebbed in thick swaths of fog and the glass is drenched in condensation too thick for you to see the mess, the travesty, staring back at you—and sink down against the tile, letting the scalding water rain down across your skin. 

It isn't purification. This isn't a baptism. It's—

His come drips down your thigh. Thick, and milky white on your skin; tinged a pearled pink from your blood. Pretty, he'd grunted the first time he saw it ringed around his cock, drying on your skin. Just like a ripe, sweet cherry—

You can taste him on your tongue. Ash and whiskey. Tobacco. Malt and sage and sweetgrass. Salt-touched from the sweat on his upper lip, clinging to his beard. Feel it on your skin still, too. Coarse hair scratching your cheeks. Your neck. His rough hands pulling at you, cinching your waist tight between his worn palms. Callouses digging into your hips, scraping your flesh. Tugging you against him. Into him. Ride me, baby, just like that, mm. Bucking up from below. Your hands clenched on his shoulders; the dusting of hair smattering across his collarbones tickling your palms. His belly sliding over you. This is all you needed, huh? His hands cupping your breasts. Your throat. Squeezing tight. Just needed your daddy to fill you up, mm?

Your skin itches, prickling with the ghosts of his touch. The way he stretched you, filled you. Fucked you deep—too deep. Cockhead drilling into the seal of your womb; battering your cervix with each full, deep press of his hips. Spilling inside of you each time—gonna let daddy fill you up, mm? Must be so lonely, sweetheart. Maybe you just need daddy to give you some siblings, huh—

He's in your head. Tattooed along your gyri—his fingerprints lingering in every synapse. Wiggled in so deep, you could cleave through every limb, every muscle, and still feel him embedded inside you.

(a cancer.)

The only saving grace is that you don't expect to run into him again. 

He got what he wanted, after all—a pretty thing coming undone on his tongue, wrapped tight around his cock as you whined and writhed and tried to push him off of you, out of you, begging him not to come—and so did you:

a man, caught between daddy and dad; a father figure to breathe his sorrow, a silent apology, into the bracket of your thighs when his come leaked out, tinged pink, and a man who twisted your body into whatever shape he liked best, using you until you couldn't remember how to say no anymore. 

You feel both sated and sick—a sore, aching mess caught between nausea and dread (biting off more than you could chew; a child stumbling around in her mother's stilettos, lips painted clownishly red), and grown, aged and new, even though you walked into that room as an adult, old enough to buy your own drinks, and sublet an apartment of your own. Different, in a messy, sticky sort of way. Raw from shedding your old skin.

a baptism in the nicotine-tinged spit of an older man.

Ken blinks sleep out of her eyes as she reaches for the sugar at the dining table your father picked, yawning behind the stretch of her hand. You stare at her for a moment, feeling a strange, surreal sense of loss. Everything looks the same, but you feel different. Fractured, somehow. A new you in your old body. 

(like he made you leave more than just a smear of pale-pink behind on the cold tile—)

Maybe it's the consequences of toying with older men. For not playing the part he assigned to you originally—the whore who would be chirping at her next victim after washing away the evidence of her last host.

For trying to make something sacred and safe out of a married man, as if the ring on his finger, the one that burned when he wrapped his hand around your throat to hold you still as he pounded his cock inside of you, was inconsequential in face of your naked wants.

Broken childhoods can only excuse your ugliness for so long.

But it's fine, you think, even if your stomach churns and your palms sweat around the mug of coffee you can't bring yourself to drink. You got what you wanted—if only for a little while.

Lessoned learned—

Or they should be.

But after stepping outside of his role, he seems determined not to go back.

He stands in front of the table, looking down at you, and it's such a perfect moment of symbolism, that you almost feel awed as you stare at the shadow he casts over your untouched omelette.

Dressed in brown corduroy trousers, and a seashell dress shirt that cost more than the rented suit your father promised to return three years ago, he looks like a staple piece; a figurehead of luxury. Everything tailored to perfection. Cut with his measurements in mind.

But it's not his clothes you're staring at, but the pale, slim hand curled around his forearm.

It's easier to render someone's existence into little more than a guilty afterthought when they don't exist within the brackets of your physical reality, when they're incorporeal and watered down; a ghost on the edges of your periphery, easy to ignore. To banish. To make up slights to feed the flimsy excuses you whispered to yourself while her husband groaned into your cunt—

Your dad jumps in quickly, obviously to your paroxysm of conscious; offering a seat to Mr and Mrs Price—an honour, of course, to have them at his table, and wouldn't you know it, he was just thinking about how good the two of them looked together, admiring them from afar because, gosh, Mrs Price, your husband is quite an accomplished man and a genius when it comes to business ventures, which he, himself, is interested in, too, maybe Mr Price would like to hear a bit about it, as such a highly regarded man of business—and you swallow down the nausea that dredges up again as she gives him tight-lipped smile drenched in a cold, polite indifference, before casting a shrewd, and rather pointed, look at her husband.

But he isn't paying much attention to her displeasure. No. He seems to be relishing in yours even if he hasn't yet graced you with his gaze, or given you any modicum of attention.

You can feel it, the arrogance, roiling off of his shoulders, the same ones that carry the deep, jagged red lines from your nails as the command of fight him off, beg him not to come inside you edged a little too close to reality. A futile one, of course; easy dismantled with the tight grip of his hand around your throat, a snarl brimming the back of his.

don't leave a mark on daddy, baby—

He cut himself off then, but as he tucks himself into table as if he wasn't the reason for the ache between your thighs, the rest fills in with a simmering, sinister whisper: or my wife will see.

You feel flayed. Hollowed out. A feeling that's made worse when Mrs Price sets her eyes on you, and they immediately narrow into suspicious slits. The only saving grace from the guilt that chokes you alive is that she doesn't linger. No. Her disdain is aimed at Ken instead.

Despite yourself, you can't help wondering if Ken was the type Price usually went for. If there was something about her that drew a wife's ire quicker than you. Jealousy, in this context, at this abhorrent table with an adulterer, a spiteful wife, a whore, and a leech, is unfounded—especially when it's directed at the only innocent one here—but you feel it tightening inside your guts all the same. Another shame to add to the rest; sin after sin after—

"...and this," your dad says, a loud proclamation that cuts through the terse glare Mrs Price keeps on Ken (and the bemused look Ken sends your way in response), and draws everyone's attention back to you when he motions with his hand, an easy sweep. "Is my daughter."

It's then that Price finally looks at you, takes you in. But where you'd expect the haughty conquest of a man whose machinations put his wife and whore at the same table, eating the same waxy eggs and drinking cool, bitter coffee, you instead find a brief, but deep, thrum of anger that clots over the sun-touched blue of his eyes, darkening them into a murderous slant of unpolished sapphire; a swelling, blackening azure of a Mediterranean storm.

The suddenness of it, and maybe the ugliness, too—a soot-stained smear covering all the warmth you'd felt last night when he curled his hand behind your head and dragged you in for a kiss softer than the cashmere sweater he gave you before (more tender, too, than the rasped arms up he uttered as he slipped it over your head; or when pressed a featherlight, gentle kiss to your forehead when it popped through the opening before sending you to your bed); leaving you sated and sore but more whole, settled, than you felt in a long, long time. 

But it's gone, peeled away from you and angled at your father as he beams in some facsimile of pride—undoubtedly having just lied about what university you went to and what job you have, if only to bolster his own status of a man who breeds promising upspring.

And as your dad continues with another lie ("my daughter's a good girl, ivy league, aren't you, kiddo?"), you realise what it was that set him off:

daughter.

It's on this word that his jaw clenches. The he placed on the table curls into a fist, knuckles blanching under the strain. It's—

It's a powerful feeling, really. For a man to be so covetous of you, enough that's plain to see the lines of greed, of jealousy, etching into the divot of his brow, the sour mark of his mouth when he frowns. Fingers curling, holding himself back from—

From lashing out, maybe.

From snatching you up, cradling you possessively to his side.

Powerful—and intoxicating. Enough that it makes you deliberately press your thighs together, just to feel the ache he left behind. Delighting in the sting, the burn; letting it balm the guilt and shame that eats at you still.

Your squirming catches his attention, and he stares at you again as your dad prattles on. The look on his face is full of barely stifled want, a naked hunger; burning sapphire. A look so scorching, that makes Ken gasp beside you.

Mrs Price, drawn to the noise, glances sharply over to her. Disapproval makes her lips tilt downward, angling the corners to the ring of Tiffany Blue diamonds draped over her slender neck. The hue almost matches Price's eyes, and your stomach churns at that subtle realisation.

"Well," she says, her voice low and rich. Saccharine as she looks away from Ken, and back to your dad. "Hopefully one day our daughters can be as accomplished as yours."

Daughters.

You knew, of course. In the back of your head. In the sleepless nights spent tossing and turning, mind reeling over what you were ruining, the thought of a close-knit family brimmed. Dark and awful. Those poor kids. But now the thought makes you sick for another reason. And it's silly. He's a grown man, married—it's almost a given that a man as traditional as he is would have children already. Probably married Mrs Price at nineteen, too. It shouldn't rankle you this terribly, shake you this much, to think of him as a father, and not just—

Whatever he was to you last night. This week. Filling in the margins of something you didn't ask for. Didn't seek out. 

And maybe a little bit of it is envy. Jealousy. Taking away the man, and the father you're left with is something out of a hallmark movie—coddling, gentle; softening his words even though the natural grit in his voice won't let him. Patient and reverent and so goddamn doting—

Good girl, he'd said, and you can easily imagine his hand on your head, thumbs stroking your skin as he doles out easy praise.

But the thought of that, too, of being related to him by blood, makes your stomach churn just as viciously because you want him with a fury that makes your throat ache, scorched and bruised swallowing back the fire that threatens to leak out—want more of that paternal warmth, too—but not enough to give up the way he felt inside of you. How he growled your name when he came, muffled by your hand pressed against his jaw, fingers curling over his lips. Trying to keep him from kissing the pleads of no, don't come inside me, daddy from your lips. 

A game; playing pretend.

It feels like there's a war inside of you; the ache left behind from his cock is the sweetest, most awful thing you'd ever felt, but it wouldn't be complete if the hurt wasn't balmed by the warmth in his voice as he murmured arms up, baby and so good for me, sweetheart. His lips against your forehead. Safe and sated. The two knitting together until they become a single entity.

It's wrong to want this, to feel this way. To want a man to be two things at once, polar opposites: a lover and a father; a comforting hand that soothes and heals and gives out affection as easy as breathing—

But to also be held down, taken apart, and bullied into a soft, melting submission by those same hands. The ones you want to slip the clothes off of your body, hungry for your bare skin; but to redress you afterwards. Arms up, baby.

(a sick, sick, terrible thing, and you think you hate Price a little bit for dragging these ugly, buried wants out into the naked daylight only to taunt you with the idea of them; his daughters, protected against the world that will hurt them the same way it hurt you if it gets a chance, and his wife, her hand still curled around his arm—)

It's more petulant than you want it to be when it slips out, a soft, chiding: "daddy," something you've never called your father before, but it's worth the temporary embarrassment when Price jerks his head up, eyes burning, narrowing when your father makes a noise, dismissive and pleased at all once. "Stop it, you're embarrassing me."

The man is angry, jealous; but your father is proud.

"Oh, honey—"

Price makes a noise in the back of his throat, cutting him off. "Well," he starts, and his hand flexes, tensing. The look he gives you is nothing short of murderous. "You're in luck, sweetheart—" your heart lurches, a hopeful, yearning squeeze, but he glances pointedly at his wife, and you feel bile climb up your throat. "You're looking at their new nanny."

She's just as bewildered as you are when she turns from Price to Ken, then slowly, carefully, to you. "Oh. I hadn't—" she swallows, and tries to smile but it comes out as a grimace. "I hadn't realised we needed one—"

"Ivy league nanny," he cuts in, leaning back in the chair. The picture of ease, as if he hadn't just shocked the table into an uncomfortable silence. "Quite a catch, isn't she? The girls will love her."

"Yes," she agrees after a moment, her smile pained. Forced. It's clear that she won't—or can't—interrupt her husband, no matter how utterly disagreeable she finds his decision. Finds you. A nanny to his children—someone they barely know. How utterly absurd. "What a lovely surprise."

"Been thinkin' about it since you—" as Price motions lazily towards your father, something in his cadence makes the back of your neck prickle; "—mentioned her all those months ago. Couldn't let the opportunity to snatch her up for myself—my daughters—pass. You won't mind, of course—she'll come stay with us, be closer to the girls—" Mrs Price nearly chokes, but John doesn't look her way; "—easier for everyone," he finishes, decisive. Firm. His word, at the table and the world at large, is final. Non-negotiable. He wants it, he said it, and so, it must be true. And if it isn't yet, it will be.

In the wake of that irrefutable finality, the table quiets, digesting his words slowly. Ken looks confused (her elbow presses into your side, hissing why didn't say something under her breath), and your dad tries, and fails, to bring the conversation back to focus, making prying remarks about pay and wages and how proud he is of you, his daughter, all of which are ignored by both of the Prices'—John, content to stare at you over the rim of his mug, ignores her attempts to get his attention, and she lapses into a stiff, uncomfortable silence; her face slipping back into the cold disdain from before. Guarded, almost, as she slips her hand away from his arm and into her lap.

You're not sure what to make of this sudden revelation, either. You had assumed that you both got what you wanted—him, a fantasy come to life: a pretty thing wrapped tight around his cock; and you, something to stuff inside the wound inside of you, to balm the ache of a lonely, affectionless childhood in the arms of a man who could be both things to you at the same time, and neither all at once.

To you, another wound you'll feel when you're older and wiser and realise that there wasn't any victory in conquering (in being conquered) by a man like him—just more hurt, more trauma that would ache before it scabs over, scars. A twinge you'll feel sometimes when you think back to this moment and wish you never met him at all because men like him like to consume, they devour, and when they're finished, there's seldom anything left over the salvage. Ruin to you, but to him—

It was supposed to be another dime in his pocket, another notch in his bedpost. Something to reminisce about later, when he went out searching for something else. Trying on new yous for size just to see how they fit. Insubstantial. Temporary. Impermanent. What you had with him wasn't transactional—it was wish fulfillment and nothing more. A stopgap. Not something to be dragged into the light of day.

You thought you were both just playing your parts.

But this—

This changes the dynamic. Reshapes it into something new. A new role for you to fill where he parades you around in front of his family, and they all pretend that they can't smell the putrefying residuum of a lonely, starving child oozing out of the wound in your chest. Where he'll fuck you in his martial bed when they leave the house, and make you call him daddy. And you will because once you let a man like him make a choice for you, it'll never end. Never stop.

But that's what drew you to him in the first place, wasn't it? And there's really no one to blame for this but yourself—after all, you should have known better.

Power is a wonderful thing in the hands of people who know how to weld it, and his are worn enough to tell you that he does it often. And usually at the expense of everyone except himself.

You just didn't expect it to happen to you.

The unctuous spill of your father trying to scheme more favours under the guise of thanking Mr Price for everything he's done follows them as they leave the table.

Feeling slightly dazed, numb, you watch them go, lingering on the firm hand Price keeps around her arm, jaw clenched tight as she mutters under her breath. You can imagine the things she must be saying to him (really, John? not even the pretty one?) from the venomous glare she angles his way when they reach the door, but he doesn't spare her a glance, just pushes her towards the exit as the pool boy Ken has been seeing—Kevin, you think she said—spots him, and offers a wide grin.

Ken lets out a small noise as they exchange a few hushed words. 

"You should have told me you were fucking Mr Midlife Crisis," she whines, pouting. "What gives? And please tell me he has an equally rich, equally fuckable best friend, or something—"

"I'm not fucking him," you murmur, ignoring her snort of disbelief and the churlish yeah, right as you watch John slip his hand into his pocket, and drag out a wad of cash that Kevin takes with a grin.

And for the most part, it's true:

You're not just fucking him. And as the pieces of whatever he's planning, whatever schemes he has for you, begin to fall into place, it becomes clear that you don't just fuck a man like John Price without consequences. 

he’s dangerous, your dad says afterwards, thumb running over the curve of the lounge card Price let him keep (with a Duchenne smile, one too wide for his face: all yours, he'd told him, but his eyes were on you). There's something in the lines etched across his face—an uncertainty, almost. Dark corners touched with guilt. He looks at you, then, and you know that the hazy figure who lured him here—some silent partner, interested in his schemes—was Price. 

Gets what he wants, he adds, tentative. Meek. You've built your life around his moods. Made a home out of his anger, his misery. But you've never seen him look quite like this. So shaken. So rattled. As if the wool was being ripped from over his eyes, and he wasn't sure what to make with what sat in front of him. 

“He always does. And he's, uh, he’s a pretty rough bastard to negotiate with. Knows things, y’know?” Something uneasy swims over his expression, shuddering through the guilt. The uncertainty. “Don't know how the fuck he knows what he knows, but he does. And if that don't work—well, the big fucker who follows him around like a goddamn shadow can be pretty persuasive.”

And then—

“but, uh, you'll be fine, kiddo. John, he—well, he loves his girls. I didn't know he was even listenin’ when I was talkin’ about you, though. Might've, uh, embellished your accomplishments and how great you were with kids, but you'll be fine. Sweet little gig until you get another job offer somewhere else—”

it takes a while for everything to really sink in, but you can't really be too mad—fathers have sold their daughters for a lot less, after all. 

Before he leaves, he tells you that he'll send for you in three weeks.

"Got things to take care of first," he murmurs into the back of your head, the hand on your belly slides lower, keeping you secure on his lap in the private lounge. "When m'done, I'll send for you. First class—you'd like that, wouldn't you?"

His wedding ring gleams under the gauzy, golden light when he drags his hand further down until he reaches the tops of your thighs. The other rests lazily on the arm of the velvet green chaise. A tumbler of whiskey cradled against his pinky, ring finger, and thumb; a lit cigar sits between his index and middle.

A man comes to refill both whenever he gets too low without a word. A silent presence. He doesn't look at you. Doesn't acknowledge that you're not the same woman John showed up with.

Money, you realise, can buy indifference. A cold, impartiality. Frigid ignorance. The men in the room, the same ilk as Price, all look away when he gropes you openly, immodest and unashamed.

"And don't bother packing anything," he rasps, rolling his mouth across the back of your neck, the thick tangle of wry curls scraping across your skin until it smarts, a little sting. "I'll buy whatever you need."

You know his game. Remember, vividly, the way he handed over more cash than you'd make in a day working to a man your friend was distracted by. Know, deep down, that this is a dangerous thing. Thrilling, of course, in a way you can't begin to unravel; but deadly.

A man who buys people, morals, so effortlessly is not the same as the boys you'd tease in college—the men you'd flirt with when your dad turned his back. Shunning them the moment they bowed, keeled over, and teased you back. It was more thrilling to chase than it was to have, but with him—

There's no just teasing, no just fucking, a man like him. Not without giving something of yourself up—a trophy for him to hang on the wall.

But still. Still.

"Gonna spoil me, daddy?" you breathe, pushing against his chest, a light tease—just to feel the rumble of his low growl against your spine. The heat of him searing into your skin.

"m'gonna treat you like a goddamn queen."

There's a sting against your nape, the burning pinch of teeth as he bites down on your skin, as if to embed the words into your flesh. Make them true.

His hand slides down, fingers slipping between your thighs to tease the bare skin of your mound. Spread 'em for daddy comes in a sneering growl. The men around you politely avert their eyes when you obey his command, letting his hand slip between them as your hushed gasps reshape themselves into low moans, little whimpers.

You might be more like your father than you realised because you can't stop the oily, greedy sense of victory from blooming in your belly; the ugly want that rages, hungry for more of what you don't deserve. Pushing back into his chest as if you could absorb the feeling of him against you through osmosis, keeping it tucked inside to soothe the loss of him for the next three weeks, waiting for whatever plans he has to come to fruition.

But, as it turns out, you don't have to wait very long.

The news comes a week later.

Mrs Price, after snorting clonazepam and drinking a bottle of wine, slipped on the slick tile of their indoor pool, and drowned.

It's branded, officially, as an accident, but whispers lurk in dark corners of a deeply unhappy woman in a loveless marriage—one soon to be dissolved had it not been for the untimely tragedy. 

Price started divorce proceedings a month ago, they say. Something she just—hadn't taken very well. Accidents happen, though, and the investigation is closed without much pomp; Mrs Price is laid to rest only a few days later. 

He calls you in the days between the wake and burial, and though you didn't really know her, know their marriage, the absence of any sorrow in his voice as he speaks around cold, indifferent facts—give the girls a week to mourn, send tickets for the airline afterwards; a dinner to introduce everyone, but, oh, they're fine; eager to meet you, of course (a shock, really: you hadn't known they knew you at all)—and they sink in your belly like a stone. 

It isn't your place to dwell on the mechanics of their lacklustre marriage and whatever might have led him to you, and her—

well. 

You ask, though. Just a bit. Mostly hedging around the edges, skirting the periphery of what happened that night, and where he was (busy with work, the girls at their grandmother's for the night). He seems faintly amused by your subtle prying, humming into the phone about how he'll feel better when he finally has you home until it's all put to rest, and you pretend the nervous flutter in your belly when he calls is excitement instead of dread. 

A terrible tragedy. That's all—

and the dreams that plague you at night are just that: dreams. even if each time you close your eyes, all you can see is the smear of a man—a vague, gauzy entity of smudged pale peach and brown—leaning over you, holding you down; submerged in a watery kaleidoscope of Tiffany Blue as the waves breaking over his long, thick forearms cutting through the surf gleam like diamonds on his skin before they disappear beneath your chin. 

—and really, you were never much of a swimmer to begin with (too many bad memories shaped by your father, after all), so it doesn't mean anything at all when you start to avoid pools and open water after getting that call. 

It's just—

Pragmatic, is all. 

The problem is this:

Your daddy didn't do anything to protect you, he muses, fingers beneath the hem of your new dress. Offered you up like it was nothin’. Ain't that a shame? 

The quiet, shaken yes spills from your lips when he sinks his finger inside of you—right to the knuckle. 

“‘course you think so,” he drawls, twisting his hand until the unease in your belly evaporates into pleasure. Into need. “Knew right then that a sweet girl like you deserved a better dad.”

Didn't you, he prods, low and dangerous. Edged with something you can't place. Didn't you baby?

“Yes—” you eke out, moving against his hand, chasing the pleasure his touch brings because it's better than the alternative—than thinking too much about what he's saying. What it means. 

Something you'll consider later, maybe. When you're all alone in his house, wearing his ring. You'll think about it, and then him—how he looked beneath the water: dad, daddy, and god—and you'll choke on the chlorine in the back of your throat—

“Forgettin’ your manners already, mm?” he asks, and there's flint in his tone. A thin line of steel cutting along his words that makes your toes curl in the kitten heels he bought for you when the plane landed. It's a demand, even though he shades it as a soft coo, and gentle nudging. “Go on. Say thank you.” 

And you do. Spread across his lap in the back of the car, clenching around two thick fingers as a man you met briefly as Nik hides his expression behind dark sunglasses, pretending as if you weren't coming undone against the soft silk of his bosses slacks, you sob your gratitude into the thick column of John’s throat. Choking it out as he works you over the edge and into that sweet oblivion where he's still just a man, and this is all—and has always been—a choice you made in the low light of a bar. 

“Thank you, daddy—” 

"Like it?" He asks, and draws you closer to his side when you nod, still taking in the cosy home he brought you to. 

Meeting him might not have been aleatory but when he moves away from your temple, nose trailing downward over your cheek until his lips whisper over yours, the world seems to set itself back in motion. Antiphonal heartbeats blooming in tandem. 

This, this, feels like waking up. Like coming home. 

As if he hears your thoughts, he pulls you closer to him, swallowing the gasp that tumbles from between your lips; taking your breath into his lungs. 

Me, too, it says. Me, too. 

"Good. Now—" he presses his lips to your cheek, a sweet kiss to anyone looking but you feel the bite of his teeth scraping against your skin. "Go say hi to your sisters, and tell them we're goin' out for dinner. Gonna celebrate me brinin' 'em home a new mommy—"

(and sometimes, when you close your eyes at night, you don't even dream about a pool.)

[twolegsandbleeds]

Part 2 of younger medic!reader and older!price.

!!MDNI!!

find part one here if you want to know how we got to mistake number three.

cw: afab reader, fingering, masturbation. no piv (yet lol).

______________________________________________

you avoided Price as much as humanly possible for the week after.

in briefings you'd stay at the opposite end of the room, back against the wall and eyes fixed on a spot on the wall just next to his head.

you used the gym when you knew he wouldn't be there.

you flirted harder with Soap like that could somehow distract you.

he noticed - of course he noticed.

he caught your arm at the end of one briefing before you could rush out - and you yanked it out of his grip as if the touch burned.

which it did. but not in a bad way. in a way that made your lower stomach feel gooey and a pulse jump in your cunt.

so yeah… maybe it was a bad way actually. in the circumstances.

he'd just blinked at you and dropped his hand back to his side, a small frown on his face when he spoke next.

“jus’ wanted to check in love. know it was a first for you the other day.”

you blink back at him and then nod, slowly, as if you haven't been so consumed with thoughts of him that the RPG hadn't entered your mind once.

you mutter that you're fine, the ringing in your ears has stopped. you're just going to work in the med centre at base for a while. doctors orders.

and then you practically flee before he can respond, leaving him staring at the spot you were just occupying like he's not quite sure what just happened. but he knows you're being… odd.

you continued to avoid eye contact, leave rooms before you could be the last two in there and think about him at night.

_______________________________________

your third mistake came pretty soon after that.

you were alone in the med centre, restocking supplies and finishing charts. nothing out of the ordinary. but then you heard the clinic door thunk open behind you - the familiar creak cutting through the silence. then the sound of heavy boots on linoleum. you spin on your toes to see who it is, clutching the chart you're holding to your chest like you're carrying state secrets.

it's Captain Price. figures.

and for the first time in the time you've known him he's looking at you like you've pissed him the fuck off.

you swallow as he crosses the room, throat suddenly dry. his eyes track the movement down the front of your neck. you suddenly feel observed, like prey. but you straighten your spine, tilt your chin up - the medical centre is your space after all. he's just a visitor. and an uninjured one at that.

“you've been avoidin’ me.” It's clipped, curt. “and I want to know why. my team doesn't work when one of ‘em can't even look at me.”

he comes to a stop in front of you and you can't help but think it's entirely rude he's worn a henley to come have this conversation. the way it hugs his biceps and the peek of dark chest hair between the buttons is entirely distracting.

“‘m not technically on your team.” you reply without thinking, “just a medic on the same base.”

he frowns. wrong answer. you clutch the clipboard a little closer to your chest.

“you’re avoidin’ the subject.” he replies, raising his eyebrows, “jus’ like you're avoidin' me.”

you don't really have an answer for that. so you turn and slam the clipboard down on a metal cart a little too harshly, busying your hands by restocking supplies you've already restocked.

“not avoiding you. just busy.” it's a lie, an obvious one - so obvious it's almost embarrassing. so obvious you can feel your cheeks flush.

you can almost feel the weight of his gaze on the back of your head, feel him track the way you shift your weight between your feet like you're fighting the urge to run.

“look at me.” it's said in his Captain's voice, the one that holds no room for argument, no room for disagreement or disobedience.

it makes your pulse flutter in your cunt again.

but you drop your supplies and turn, realising he's close - too close. so close you can practically feel the heat radiating off him.

and then there's the smell. his smell. that cigar smoke, gun oil, weird underlying herbal (maybe mint? eucalyptus? you can't quite tell) smell that's ingrained itself in your brain since that day in the field.

you try to back up. you send the metal cart skidding where the wheels aren't locked properly and lose your footing; Bambi on ice but somehow even less elegant. Price catches you just before you fall properly - one arm looped round the small of your back whilst the other catches your elbow.

he's even closer now. broad chest against yours as he rights you on your feet.

he's still frowning.

“you're jumpy.” it's a statement, not a question, the elevens lines on his forehead settling into deep grooves. “love what is it? if it was the RPG we've got people you can talk to about that.” there's no judgement in his voice, just recognition that near death experiences aren't something everyone gets over quickly.

he still hasn't let you go.

your heart feels like there's a rabid creature trying to dig through your chest and burst out of it.

“s’not the RPG.” you manage to mutter back - not a lie. you don't look him in the eye. you can't. not when you've spent the last week thinking about what he'd feel like inside you.

“then what is it? ‘cause this isn't like you.” it's the same Captain voice, and you know he's not leaving here until he has an answer.

you try and swallow away the Sahara desert in your throat.

he watches your throat bob.

he's still too close.

your heartbeat throbs in your cunt again.

his arm doesn't need to be round your waist anymore - you're steady on your own feet. but it is.

you wonder what that means. just for a second. just before you remember your mantra of too old, too much, too senior.

but the mantra doesn't work so well when he's right in front of you and there's no one else in sight.

“it's you.” you finally mutter back, eyes slamming shut out of self-consciousness for just a second. you wave a hand over him - over the chest and the arms and the face that you haven't been able to stop thinking about - “it's this. it's all this. it's distracting. and it's… making me have inappropriate thoughts.”

it's the closest thing you can say to “I can't stop thinking about you railing me.” without it potentially crossing workplace harassment procedures.

he just stares at you for a moment.

you've never seen him look anything this close shocked before.

but then his lips twitch under his moustache before he replies, and his voice has softened several degrees - losing all the sharp edges he came in with.

“‘m old enough to be your dad, love.”

you frown, “only technically. you would have had to have got started pretty young.” the retort comes too quickly, like you've already had this argument with yourself in your head. you have. several times.

his lips twitch again. he realises you've thought about that already.

you're so focussed on your heartbeat and his smell and the way you can see a scar peeking out from the neck of his shirt that you don't notice him shoving the trolley behind you out of the way, or the fact he's slowly backing you towards a medical cot until the back of your thighs hit it.

“could’ve said something, love.” he murmurs, voice dropping an octave into something gravelly you can feel in your bones. “instead of ignorin’ me. instead of runnin’ away every time you had to be in the same room as me. gives a man a complex y’know. makes ‘im think he's done somethin’ to upset you.”

“you haven't upset me.” it's quiet, too quiet. “jus’ can't be in the same room with you without…” you trail off, eyes blinking with the realisation that if you let what you want to fall out of your mouth fall out, there's no going back. there's no putting it back in the box.

his free hand reaches up, thumb brushing your jaw once before he hooks a finger under your chin to tilt your face up towards his.

“without what, love?” he murmurs, breath ghosting over your face. “spit it out. that's an order.”

an order.

your thighs squeeze together unconsciously.

something inside you snaps.

“without thinking about what you'd feel like on top of me. inside me. in my cunt and in my mouth. about if you'd be rough or soft or both with me. if you'd be one of those guys who fucks loudly or quietly. if you'd bend me over your desk after a shitty day.” once it starts tumbling out you can't stop, “i can't be in the same room as you without… without thinking about fucking you. i can't go to bed at night without wondering what you'd feel like there. I can't fucking wank without thinking about you. it’s like i’m in hell and my punishment is thinking about you.”

he quirks one dark eyebrow at that, a glint in his eye that wasn't there before.

“thinkin’ about me is your version of hell love? i'm hurt.”

there's a pause where all you can do is roll your eyes, but just as you open your mouth to retort, it snaps shut as he brushes his thumb over your lower lip - a brief touch, before his hands drop away from your body entirely.

you think that you've fucked everything up.

until he steps forwards, both hands hooked under the back of your thighs to lift you up onto the edge of the cot, your legs parting automatically so he can step between them like he's Moses and you're the sea.

he's right in your space now, leaning over you with his hands either side of your legs.

face so close you can smell the trace of tobacco on his breath. see the fine lines on his forehead. the deeper ones around his eyes and mouth.

“show me what you do when your thinkin' about me.” his voice is like steel but with rounded edges. an invitation wrapped in what sounds like an order if you weren't listening closely. “since i’ve been helpin’ you get off without even knowin’ about it.”

his hands slide to your hips, thumbs brushing over the tiny strip of bare skin where your t shirt has ridden up out of your cargos. his rough fingers hook in the waistband, but he doesn't tug.

not yet. not until you say so.

your face is hot. too hot. you know it's an unsightly shade of pink.

but you also know that your cunt is aching with him standing so close. that your insides feel like they're being pulled apart and put back together on repeat. that your chest feels like it's got the weight of a thousand sins resting on it.

so you nod, biting your lower lip harder enough that there will almost definitely be a mark.

he smiles. properly. something warm that lights up his face and makes the lines in the corners of his eyes fan out. something that makes your heart jump slightly.

before you can second guess yourself your cargos are gone. and then your underwear too. his hands land on the inside of your thighs, thumbs brushing over dimples and stretch marks with something almost tender, before his fingers dig in just slightly and he pushes you wide open.

he makes a noise that starts somewhere deep down in his chest when he sees that you're already swollen and wet. like he's a starving man seeing a good meal laid out on a silver platter.

“pretty little thing, aren't ya?.”

you're not sure if he's talking about you or your pussy.

you hesitate. he sees it, reaching for one of your hands to guide it down between your thighs where you're already slick and warm.

“show me.” this time it is an order, the same tone you've heard him use countless times before but rarely at you. you suck in a deep breath and tuck your chin to your chest like you're trying to hide from it. or from him. maybe both.

but the want outweighs the embarrassment.

so your hand moves.

two fingers dip down, gathering wetness at your entrance before slipping back up to circle your clit, just softly. just to start.

Price's eyes flick from your hand to your face, as if memorising what each press of your fingers makes your mouth do; what sort of noise eeks its way through your lips.

he watches with the same focus he has when he's staring down the sight of a sniper rifle. with the same intensity he looks at blueprints and intel.

it's like you're a target and he's learning what makes you tick. like he's filing it away in a folder labelled you that he can go back to and reference later.

he watches when you tip your head back as you slip two fingers inside yourself, crooking them slightly against the soft spongy patch inside you that makes your thighs twitch and your calf muscles tense.

he's still just standing there between your thighs watching, still focussed like you're a problem he needs to solve. but you can see the way his chest is rising and falling just a little faster than it was earlier; that there's a tinge of pink around his neck under the collar of his shirt. that there's definitely a bulge in the front of his jeans that wasn't there ten minutes ago.

you're close. really close. and you both know it. you're almost at the point where there's no going back when his hand suddenly covers yours, the tide inside you withdrawing once again as he stills you. you grumble, eyes narrowing as you glare up at him. he grins again, lopsided, leaning forward so the tip of his nose is brushing yours.

“can I ‘ave a go love?” it's almost a rasp, “need to see if I live up to those little daydreams of yours.”

you blink once. twice. three times.

and then you nod. vigorously.

his fingers replace yours, thicker and rougher. he crooks them once, almost experimentally.

“like that?” he tilts his head to the side.

he moves his fingers again, this time less of a crook and more in and out, calloused fingers dragging over the spot that makes your thighs twitch.

“or like that?”

you gasp, “second one.”

he nods, the grin spreading further across his face. his eyes have got that steely look in them that he gets when he's only got one thing on his mind.

his thumb finds your clit, watching the way you twitch until he finds a rhythm that has you coming undone on his fingers; his name slipping through your lips between moans in a way that makes it sound like a curse.

“there we go, love.” it's a murmur in your ear before he presses a kiss to the corner of your jaw - tender in a way you wouldn't expect from a man that's currently committing a hundred HR violations by finger fucking you in a clinical space.

“John,” it's a gasped warning - to not stop exactly what he's doing.

he doesn't stop. he's goal orientated and his goal right now is you. so he keeps the same unwavering pace with his fingers and thumb; two fingers in a slow but steady drag inside you, firm but controlled circles on your swollen clit.

when you come he kisses you, properly - all teeth and tongue like he wants to swallow down the noises you make. like they're enough to keep him fed for a week.

he doesn't stop until he's sure you're done, until you've stopped trembling and twitching. he pulls his fingers out slowly, carefully - before wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling your face into his chest.

“don't ignore me anymore, love. ‘s just rude.” he mutters into your hair as you cling to him like a lifeline, voice rough from want that he's restraining himself from acting on right now.

he reaches down for your underwear and cargos, slipping them back up over your legs, tapping your thigh to get you to lift your hips.

you're too shell shocked to do anything but oblige.

once he's satisfied you're as presentable as you were when he came in, he takes your face in his hands.

one last lingering kiss - softer, steadier.

and then he's gone.

you're left wondering how you just let him break you apart and rebuild you on the edge of a medical bay cot.

and when Price is back in the privacy of his own room? it's your name on his lips and the image of his fingers buried in your cunt burned into the back of his eyelids as he comes all over his own hand.

[I'm sorry this got a little… long. But once I started I just couldn't stop. If you want more parts lmk. Byeeeeee xoxo]

Tags: @sylviavf @blue-la-goon @tartinejhd @kuna-baby

[silverlullabies]

You always forget what it means to have a soldier who trains for endurance, whose body was built to run uphill with a full pack, rifle, and mission, then turn around and do it again. Whose legs don’t tremble, who doesn’t gasp for air unless it’s to curse your name through grit teeth as you come apart again around his cock.

Captain John Price doesn’t tire.

Not when your hands scramble at the sheets. Not when your thighs are shaking. Not when your voice breaks around a plea and he just chuckles low in your ear, the sound half smoke, half war drum, his cock grinding deep and sure until the sound coming out of you isn’t words anymore.

You plead once, twice- slow down, John, p-please- and you hear him coo and adjust the angle until the words spilling out of your mouth fall out in keening whines and drool pooling beneath your cheek.

Your legs shake. His don’t. He just keeps going, stroke after stroke, the endurance drilled into every muscle until you’re nothing but wrecked beneath him.

You’ve lost track of how long it’s been. Hours maybe. Time doesn’t exist when he’s like this; just the weight of him behind you, the deep roll of his hips, the ruthless grind that presses you further into the mattress with every thrust.

You’re shaking, begging for a breather. Price rolls you to your side, hooks your knee over his hip, and grinds home slow and brutal. “I’ve still got more in me love” He keeps you teetering there until the room goes white around the edges, long, deep strokes that make your spine bow and your voice break.

Pillow fisted in one hand, your ankle cupped in the other, he drives you up the curve over and over, kissing your shoulder between thrusts like a reward. “Good girl. Again.” You didn’t know again could sound like a threat and a promise.

You whimper something- his name, a curse, a sob- but he doesn’t slow.

He doesn’t ever slow.

He’s locked in like it’s a training op. Like he’s pacing himself for a long march. Like you’re just another hill he’s meant to conquer and he will, over and over, until there’s nothing left of you but trembles and the scent of him pressed into your skin.

You should’ve known better.

You’ve seen him run down enemies in the field, miles of terrain eating up under his boots.

You know what kind of man he is when it comes to pursuit.

You forgot what kind he is when he catches you.

Now your voice is gone and your legs shake with every rock of his hips and still- still- he fucks you like the finish line hasn’t even come into view yet.

You’re limp and glassy eyed. He flips the both of you, stays buried to the hilt, and rocks, humming lazily. “Easy now. Let it roll through.”

[tojisun]

price backing you into a corner, breathing into your neck, murmuring how this isn’t right even when his chub’s rubbing on the cleft of your ass and his grip is tight around the pudge of your waist.

you hiccup, delirious, and you know that it’s true—you came here for his son, after all—but john had been a constant in your wet dreams, always so heavy and warm, pressing in, in, in, until you are reduced to a whimpering tremor. you want him. you want him so much.

“please,” you say, barely above a whisper, your body awash with desire as his beard scratches your shoulder. he is pressed so close to you already, crossing boundaries that you’ve always told yourself that you could uphold in spite of your appetite, but it’s still not enough—

in. you want him in you. ruining you for everyone, even for his son—the boy you met in college, so bright-eyed and so not john.

a taste would be enough for now; a fulfillment of your deepest desires. shame and terror and guilt bleed out as pleasure and desperation unfurls, stretching with such fanged grace that you can almost fool yourself that you were meant to have this—john—all along. that he is your reward.

your saving grace.

“shit,” he puffs out, deep and emotional; his voice a rumble so jagged, you feel it serrate you to your bones. you mewl, pushing back into him, and john breathes in sharply, the moment suspending into a blank static, tension pulling taut, and it all snapping into a flurry as he hikes up your dress and tugs your panties down.

you feel delirious as you giggle, twisting your head just so to catch a glimpse of him from your peripheral, and oh. john looks absolutely hungry. intense and overwhelming.

slick drips from your pussy, eager for your filling.

[thelunaticself]

FAUX PLAY

john price x reader

dead dad's best friend tries to comfort you. or shepherd's daughter! reader x john price

a/n: happy birthday @misscherry-26 :)

cw: non+dubcon, age gap (reader in late 20s), sex, bad price, wtf is this ( ；∀；)

“You missed the whole funeral.”

Click.

A flash of red. The once chilling air of the brisk evening warms up. The sweet intoxicating smell of tobacco invades your senses. Familiar. It was there when you hid in your room on Friday nights. The rumbling sounds of laughter echoed from the living room, occasionally a clink of a beer bottle thrown on the ground. It was there when you flashed the brightest smile, graduation hat threatened to fall off your head, hairy arm wrapped around your shoulders then your dad hoisted up the camera. A big girl now, huh? John Price might as well be your diary.

“Ah. Well. Y’know I don't like all that unnecessary socialising.”

A condescending smile is all you get in return for your judging eyes. You shift your foot to crush the grass beneath. He flicks the cigarette and takes a long hit. For someone who lost their 10 years partner in a murder, he seems too at peace with himself. Smug. John stares at the name engraved on the stone. The corner of his mouth twitches slightly. This isn't your John. His hand creeps up to the nape of your neck, thumbing the skin there tenderly. 

“If anything, I'm here for you, alright?”

“I know.”

“Good. Good…”

A drop of rain hits your nose. John swipes it off for you and smiles cheekily in a pathetic attempt to lift your frown. He’s so close now that the smoke is starting to entice you. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be sad?”

He sucks in a breath. The rain gets heavier. 

“Of course, I am.”

“I don't believe that.”

Your coat is drenched, wet hair sticks to your face and neck. John fumbles with the lighter as the tip of the cigarette dies out, doing anything but looking at you. 

“John. What happened?”

The sound of the rain drowns out your voice. He flicks the lighter furiously.

“John. Answer me.” 

“Jonh.”

You reach out to flick the lighter to flame swiftly. The action catches him off guard enough for you to steal his cigarettes. No excuses now. You take a hit while glaring at him. John stuffs his hands in his pockets, shaking his wet hair. 

“You two drive me nuts.”

Letting out an exasperated sigh, he crouches down to pick up the mud stained glove lying on the grass. Your mother threw it amidst the grieving fit. His hand finds the nape of your neck again and drags you forward with him, heading back inside the mansion. 

“Come on, kiddo. Wouldn't want a second grave now, would we?”

   ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ •✸•⊹₊ ⋆୨ৎ

You don’t think your mother will ever be the same again. When the tears on her cheeks have dried, you look at her and find a dead man staring back. She still clutches your father's old coat to cry herself to sleep ever since the news hit the family. Although, if you were her, you wouldn't be so devastated over a husband who sees his kids three months max in a year. In a way, everything was functioning just fine without him until he died. That is where he steps in.

John Price has no longer been your diary. No longer just a witness. 

It reaches a point where it is harder to move John Price out of your house than the sofa nailed to the living room. Worst of all is that he is good at it. 

“Think your mom is sound for the night.”

He says as he glances at you sitting on the passenger seat. You're bundled up in a blanket, shoes off to rest your legs on the seat. The ac blows at your face. You had only meant to vent, didn't really expect any response at all when you texted him at 2am. A few “i cant sleep”  later and you heard the old gate creeked, next was the sound of your mother's room’s door, his name in her high pitched voice. Her sobs soon reduced to hiccups followed by a gruff hush voice. The thrashing completely stopped. This was the first night everything returned to how it was.

“Dunno know how you do it. She hasn't let me in there for weeks.”

“Gotta be patient.” 

He mutters and turns on the blinker.

“You plan to be her next Shepherd or something?”

You didn't mean to let the joke slip out unceremoniously like that. Halfway through opening a beer and a stupid grin. Not much of a joke. John must have thought the same because he lets it pass through like a breeze. 

“Yer gonna love this place. Promise you'll sleep like a baby after.”

“Uh huh… it's so great that I can't know the name.”

“Ask your dad, kid. He knows it pretty well.”

John chuckles. When he doesn't hear yours, he coughs awkwardly. You thought he was going to leave when he was done cooing your mother back to sleep. Turns out John Price doesn't do half ass things. A bit of lipstick was all the makeup you managed to put on while he started the engine outside. It all feels too much work even for a man like him. Like compensation.

“There it is.”

You don't even realize the car has already parked in front of an old pub. The neon letters flicker weakly amidst swirling curls of smoke from the smokers standing below. He wastes no time and leans over to buckle the belt for you, reaches up to unlock the handle afterwards conveniently. He pats your back and you jump from the contact.

“Out you go.”

You don't think you’ll sleep tonight. Your dead dad best friend is taking you to a fucking pub at 3am. Typical weekend. 

“I'm not sure about this…”

“You don't have work tomorrow. Plus, your dad didn't have any problem coming here with me every Friday. Just trust me on this one.”

With that, John ushers you inside. 

An hour in and you start to understand what he meant. Maybe it's the yellow light. Or the soft cushion. Most likely it is the whiskey John keeps calling for you shot after shot.

“Fuck, that year was a disaster. Had a big fight. Told dad I could date anyone. Not even two months later, lil shit stole my favorite heels, sold them and ran.”

The story ends with you taking another shot. He rubs his hand up and down your back when you cough violently. He was right. This feels good. Like letting go of something you never knew was there. Repressed grief. 

“I guess I do miss him.”

John only hums along. He turns away from you a bit to shuffle something out of his jean’s pocket.

A handkerchief is softly pressed onto your lips to wipe off the ridiculous whiskey mustache. Your lipstick leaves a red smudge on the cloth. 

“Ready to go back?”

“Huh?”

He hoists you up by the waist.

“Your mother would be pissed.”

You think that sentence is meant for himself. 

The drive home is uneventful except for the fact that you can't even buckle your own belt. John huffs out a laugh, places his hand over yours and pushes in swiftly with a soft click. 

What happens after is lost to you. A warm hand is always either on your waist or your head so that you wouldn't tip over. Now lying on unfamiliar bedding, lights out, one is kneading the inside of your thigh, the other finds its place on your back, under your shirt. You can faintly make out John’s face in the dark room. 

“John, why is it so hot in here? Isn't there like…like a fucking ac?

Your fists hit his chest weakly. With a grunt, he manhandles your whole body to lie on the bed fully.

“Sorry, baby.”

There is no safe banter to keep the thin wall between the two of you tonight. He is eerily quiet, only curt replies or ignoring your blabbering altogether. Observing. It starts an alarm in your head even in your drunken haze. 

“John, why are you so mean to me?”

He pulls the neck of your shirt down and just stares at the exposed flesh for a while. It would be more reasonable of him to go after your mother. Someone more his age. If anything, he learns that he is not as good as he’d like to be. A soldier and all. At the end of the day, John Price is but a man. 

You laugh at him dumbly. Fucking brat.

“Uh, John? What are you-”

John Price rubs his fingers down there causing you to grip his shoulders, the underwear adds more friction. When your breath hitches and your thighs close tight around his hand, he bet he can see the outline of your cunt if he's hard-working enough to dip his head down. John almost cums on the spot at the thought alone but he chooses to bend down and nuzzle your neck instead. He keeps you in that position until your scent is all he can register, feels your body shaking, your erratic breath fanning on his cheek. His own erection rubs your thigh.

“J-john I-i think-”

“Let it out, baby. I hate it when you think too much.”

He says as he presses down harder and increases his pace. You bite his shoulder when you come, thighs clench around his waist, pulling him down to collapse on you. When he feels your breathing return to normal, John lifts his head from your chest and looks down at you. You are not the embodiment of beauty. Not the kind to end up on the magazines Shepherd used to hand him. Lipstick smeared and messy hair. A wet trail of tears at the corner of your eyes. Ugly and blunt in all the right way. Prettiest thing he has ever touched. 

Your mother swirls the spoon aggressively in the coffee mug she insisted on making for you first thing in the morning. She pressed you to sit down on the dining chair when she saw you scouring the fridge (the price of refusing to eat John’s cooking). You can't blame her for being so anxious like that. Your morning attire doesn't exactly scream “sleep like a baby” even if you did last night. 

“I know you're all grown up and have a job now, but it wouldn't hurt to tell your old mother before going out all night.”

“Mom, I wasn't doing drugs or anything-”

“I have to wait until you actually do it?”

She sits opposite to you and puts the mug down a bit too harshly. You don't dare to reach for it yet.

“So, who?”

“Who?”

“Don't act dumb.”

Her slender fingers reach up to toy with one of the pearls of the necklace. 

“This is ridiculous. I'm almost thirty-”

“You're still my daughter.”

“Fine. John Price.”

Her movements come to a halt. Eyes widen just enough for you to see the realization settle in.

“I couldn't sleep. We went out for a drink. Nothing happened. I even saw him sleeping on the couch.”

“Oh. Hm.”

This is her most tight lipped smile you have ever seen. She stands up rigidly and heads to the living room, sipping the mug of coffee. Your stomach is still empty.

   ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ •✸•⊹₊ ⋆୨ৎ

They say don't repeat your mistake twice. John says it is not a mistake at all. How could he when you are under his sheets, on his bed, tummy full of his cooking. It's not even his own doing. Your mother booked a trip to Venice on her own to start her “healing journey”. Apparently, it was a group trip with widows all from upper families like her. In fact, he wouldn't have been lying here with you had he accepted her offer. The group was just the second choice. One night in and he already received your text. 

The first night was a disaster. He took you to the pub as usual, got you drunk, passed out on his bed. He even got to kiss you on the lips before you blacked out. A success if it wasn't for the fact that he was woken up by the sound of vomiting. John could only see your back from his point of view. Your whole body shook, half still covered by the blanket. You vomited straight on the floor next to the bed then plopped back down to sleep. John rushed out to fetch the rag. 

Tonight he wants to keep it simple. A home cooked meal. Although, it is not without its turbulence. The first night you really sleep with him. No more moving to the couch early in the morning and pretending to sleep. Without the heavy alcohol, small talks will have to suffice. For now.

“My mom’s into you.”

“Hm?”

John pulls the sheet higher for the both of you. 

“I know you heard that.”

“Hey, don't laugh. I'm serious.”

You hit his arm and he snorts. You're telling him this like you're gracing him with some sort of forbidden knowledge. 

“Okay, okay… M’ not blind, alright?”

“You just don't like her?”

“She’s a good gal.”

“You didn't answer me.”

“Look, kid. I've already set my mind elsewhere.”

You nudge your toes against his.

“ ‘M not a kid.”

“If you say so.”

John turns his back to you, ending the conversation. That was faster than you expected. You keep eyeing him to see if he moves out to the couch. After a while, you give up. Not like this is your house. 

It's still night time when you wake up. Heavy rain smashes against the window, the ac on max capacity, John's hand under your shirt. What? What the fuck?

“J-john.”

Trying to pry out his hand on one of your tits only results in a tight squeeze. The other goes down to circle your clothed cunt on autopilot. He grunts into your neck, half-awake. 

“Go back to sleep.”

“You need to get off-”

His fingers find your clit and you let out a yelp. Suddenly, he stops, grabbing one of your hands. It comes into contact with something solid and slick. 

“No, stop-”

His big one is placed over yours, forcing an up and down rhythm. You haven't looked at him during the entire process. The fact that you're getting wetter even without his hand makes you never want to go home again. A big palm cradles the back of your head and turns your face towards him. John pecks your lips.

“I love you.”

The distraction works because you don't have time to realize he has already pushed the tip inside. Your hips bruised from how hard he grips it to keep you still. Sweats gather on his forehead, eyebrows furrowed because you're clenching around him so tight that it's almost impossible to push in further.

Something wet on his arm. You're crying. Your tears lazily roll from your eyes to land on his arm. 

“Easy, easy. I got you.”

John stops moving his hips and leans down to lap at your tears. Landing a final kiss at your nose, your breathing slows down, your eyes droopy but looking at him at last. He smiles, moves a strand of hair out of your eyes and tucks it to the back of your ears. So gently you can't believe this is the same man who has his tip lodged into you right now. 

“So pretty, baby.”

Your bite down on his arm as John pushes all the way in. This time, when John has finally found his home, he truly kisses you for the first time ever. Wet and messy. His tongue explores all the opportunities to have a taste of you. Not a dance but a chase. Slowly, he drags out. Agonizing like chalk sliding over blackboard. After a while, the two of you settle into a routine. Him pistoning in and out of you while your only job is moaning into his arm.

“Shit. I was right. Fucker’s better off gone.”

John mutters in between the thrusts. He too is starting to lose his wits. The sentence is so jarring that it drags you right back for a split second.

“Wh-what?”

He answers that by slamming in particularly hard. His balls slap your ass cheeks then everything comes to a halt. Not because he plans to answer your question or anything. His cum leaks out of your cunt from how much there is. A warm and gooey feeling spreads from your core to your entire body. You have your toe curling release right after. 

“What did you say?”

John pulls you into his chest and kisses your cheek. 

“Just an old man’s blabbering. Nothin’ important enough.”

“Drop it. You've been weird ever since the funeral.”

“I told you. Something just slipped. That's all.”

“Is it about my dad?”

“For fuck’s sake-”

“You killed him.”

His silence is all you need to confirm. The lulling after sex atmosphere is gone. A flip switches in your head. John lets you wring out of his arms, stumbling out of the bed. The blanket slips. You're not thinking straight. You're not thinking at all. Your elbow hits the nightstand and you hold onto it before your wobbling legs give out. 

“Listen, I can explain-”

“Shut up!”

John keeps a straight face as your scream bounces off the walls hauntingly.

“You fucking disgust me!”

He also only props an elbow up to watch you pry open the nightstand to look for your phone he put in at the start. There is a gun in there. Nice and handy thing he keeps in case of a night intruder. Next to the gun is a neatly folded handkerchief with a lipstick stain that you easily recognize. But of course, that isn't important right now.

Your pretty fingers wrapped around the trigger. Fucking majestic he might say. Naked with his gun. Pointed at his head too. He might cum again. 

“I won't be mad. Promise.”

John grins up at you from below. Your tears land on his cheeks. Shaky hands keep clenching and unclenching the gun. Trembling thighs wrapped around his torso. When one of your hands presses down on his chest for balance, his palm gently wraps around your wrist, brings it to his lips and he softly kisses each of your knuckles. You're crying so hard the tears blur out everything. 

Smack.

John's left cheek is burning red. The tingling pain spreads across the flesh. The gun lies limply on the floor in the opposite direction from where you threw it. 

   ౨ৎ ˖ ࣪⊹ •✸•⊹₊ ⋆୨ৎ

Tap. Tap.

John rasps his knuckles against your car window. You have just parked outside your usual lunch spot. The window slowly rolls down.

“What are you doing here?”

“Wanna go have lunch together?"

He looks ridiculous bending down to peek inside to talk to you right now. A man of his size never fits right anywhere. 

“You were stalking me or something?”

John cracks a smile.

“Oh, come on. You already texted me your entire schedule. Just think of this as payment for picking you up for an entire week.”

“ ‘S not my fault that my ass car broke down.”

“How about I just miss you?”

God, this man. You fall back into your seat and sigh.

“Fine.”

John braces a hand on the window frame and leans in. You roll your eyes.

“This is unnecessary."

“Come on, baby.”

“Lemme just get out-”

John cups the back of your head, guiding your lips towards his. You’re slightly peeked out of the car window. Your left hand grips his shoulder. His tongue meets yours. Not a chase anymore. 

Later when you finish talking to him on the phone that night, your mother knocks on the door. Her voice is muffled from the other side.

“We need to talk.”

The first thing she shoves at your face is a polaroid picture in her tight fist. She growls.

“What is this?”

“Oh.”

It's you and John standing at the beach. You were wrapping your arms around his torso. Just thrifted this old shit. Want to see if it works. You swear you hid it well at the bottom of your coat.

Your mother gives you a tight lipped smile.

“Before you ask, I was vacuuming.”

“Don't we have a housekeeper?”

“Just explain whatever the hell you've been up to.”

“He’s just not that into you.”

[zordanna]

may I offer you this anatomy "study" of Arthur? Mh?

[zordanna]

"if only my big strong Arthur Morgan was laying beside me in the bed right now shirtless with a thong on, he would protect me…"

have a nice weekend *I say while I go mad in my confinement room*

anyways yeah random girl that low-key looks like me, enjoy that aftercare.

[rawme-price]

Reader and price who bicker alot and one day you say "okay, dad" in that over dramatic voice, but prices face totally flushes and he makes a strangled noise.

You raise a brow, amused and very much surprised "really? Thats what does it? A daddy kink?" He looks absolutely mortified at being called out, but you just enjoy finally being able to get under the captains skin.

Suddenly it becomes a thing with you. Whenever u can, you lean in to prices space and whisper something along the lines of "sure thing, daddy." Or "please, daddy?" And absolutely relish in the way he shifts uncomfortably, pants suddenly tight. You pointedly dont aknowledge how his blush makes him look all the more appealing and does nothing to abate ur crush.

Anyways, one of these days hes gonna break and just bend u over his desk. Stop teasing the old man :(

[zordanna]

self indulgent art basically. Yeah.

[dadslittlekitten-deactivated202]

[makoodles]

ミmy daddy didn't love me so i guess i've moved onto you

🍓 pairing: captain john price x fem reader

🍓 tags: nsfw, daddy kink, undefined age gap, oral sex, unprotected vaginal sex, rough(?) sex, both reader and price have a daddy kink that they indulge in with very little discussion, allusions to reader having a bad relationship with her father (but nothing concrete), price uses a lot of pet names for reader and also calls himself daddy several times

title is inspired by the song peter bogdanovich by my queen CMAT

masterlist

reblogs are always enormously appreciated!

If there’s one thing you know, it’s that you’re damn good at your job.

You have to be in order to survive in this ridiculous goddamn base. There are protocols to be followed, risk assessments to carry out, weapons and equipment requisition requests to send off, and you have to handle almost all of it for Task Force 141. That’s one thing about working with the military – they’re all about action, and rarely have the patience to fill in their paperwork, and then when they do it’s never done properly.

You’re patient when you need to be, willing to push when you have to, and you make sure shit gets done. It’s not an easy job; you work your ass off, and it’s often thankless. Most of your job is done behind the scenes, whether that’s requisitioning on-the-fly tactical or strategic airlifts, liaising with other units, or trying desperately to smooth over any little problems that might crop up with the higher-ups. 

It’s challenging and exhausting, and you love it, but damn, it can be fucking infuriating. Working in a male-dominated environment is a little bit soul-destroying, with every condescending comment and lascivious gaze that lingers over your body. But none of that matters, because you don’t need male approval to excel at your job. You don’t need male approval for anything.

You repeat it to yourself on the daily, which is something that you’ve never had to do before. But before, you weren’t working with Captain John Price.

He’s not… rude, per se. If anything, he’s always coolly polite. But it’s obvious, so obvious, that he just barely tolerates you. He’s gruff, short, to-the-point, and never speaks to you outside of brusque orders. It takes weeks for him to start trusting you with even the most basic of files, and even then chunks of information are often redacted. And it shouldn’t matter; you’ve worked for men like him before, you know how it goes, and if anything he’s one of the better ones.

In the beginning, when you had first been assigned to the task force, Price had not been happy about it. It had been a tough transition; your assignment had been approved by Laswell in order to take some of the strain of liaising off both her and Price, but the Captain hadn’t been too pleased about it. He had seen you as a sort of interloper, a silly little pencil-pusher sent in by the brass to do the grunt work of administration that no one else wants to do.

But you work hard, you always have done. And maybe… maybe, part of the reason that you end up busting your balls so hard is because you want– no. Maybe you need his approval. You’d prefer not to think about it; it’s easier to throw yourself into your work, and pretend that you’re doing it for you.

You’re not even sure how it started, but at some point, Price starts looking at you differently. Maybe he realises that you’re competent at your job, or maybe he just needs to get used to you. Maybe, you hope, he’s finally starting to realise that you’re good at what you do; that you can be an asset to the team, so long as they actually work with you. 

Whatever it is, he eases off. Stops being such a hard-ass, starts giving you space to do your thing. Eventually, he starts delegating too — stops hoarding the work like a miser, and finally starts treating you like you’re capable of something more than just photocopying.

He’s not a bad boss, not by a long shot. He’s kind, determined, patient when it matters, with a wry sense of humour. He’s also fiercely protective over his team, and that includes you now. 

But he’s also older, by at least fifteen years, and he’s not always the most diligent with paperwork. Typical man of action, you’ve seen it a hundred times before. There’s always something more important to do, and while he’s always so cognisant of your workload and careful not to add to it, he is also all too happy to let you take the reins when it comes to bureaucracy. You like to think that you’ve proved yourself to him, but maybe he just respects competency.

That should be it.

But you’re so ashamed to admit that even when Price stops treating you like you’re a hostile target, you can’t stop hoping for his attention. Your mental chants of I don’t need male approval for anything, I don’t need male approval for anything become a daily thing, and sometimes a several-times-a-day thing.

Because the thing is, Price can be a difficult man to please. He’s always so busy that he doesn’t have time to give you the approval that you’re straining for, but when he does it gives you the most shameful warm glow in your belly. 

A brief nod or a low grunted ‘Thanks, sweetheart’ is enough to fuel you for days now. Even better is when you’re walking along beside him, briefing him on the latest update from the higher-ups, and he leans his head in towards you as he listens intensely, sometimes even laying his large palm against the small of your back. Ostensibly, it’s to lead the way and guide you out of the path of the running cadets, but it just toes the line of professionalism and you flounder under the touch.

It’s stupid. You’re stupid. He’s just a coworker, and you need to keep your issues to yourself.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ

You’re perfectly self-aware enough to admit when you’re in a bad mood.

You start the day tired, and when you check your reflection in the mirror first thing that morning you’re greeted with the sight of a big, fuck-off pimple on your chin. It’s big, it’s throbbing, it practically has its own fucking heartbeat. You barely restrain the urge to pick at it, though you can feel it even when you’re not looking at it.

Your mood doesn’t improve when you get to the small kitchenette by your office and find that someone has used the last of the fancy French Vanilla flavoured coffee that you’ve stocked for yourself. As if that’s not bad enough, your little stash of chocolate digestives you keep for yourself for emergency bad days have disappeared too.

You clench your jaw and continue about your business. Whatever. You can survive without your coffee and chocolate.

Your resolve falters when you see the pile of paperwork on your desk, but whatever. It’s all part of the job. A little chocolate biscuit to nibble on would definitely make your job easier, but you’re a big girl and you’re just going to have to go without.

Then you get the phone call. One that makes you want to bang your head against your desk hard enough to knock yourself unconscious so that you don’t have to deal with this.

It’s time to update the TF141 personnel files. Orders from above, since there’s been significant changes to medical and surgical history in the last couple of months from injuries on missions.

 Normally, that’s not such a big deal. It just involves updating their medical and technical files, making sure that nothing major has changed with regards their addresses or other personal information, even though a big portion of it ends up redacted anyway. 

And, naturally, updating their photographs for their files.

You start easy. 

Gaz is happy to come to your office when you text him, and he stands obediently for you as you take his picture. He’s gotten a metal plate fitted in his kneecap from the last time his file has been updated, and he sits and chats easily with you as you go through his information. He’s a sweet guy, and so easy to talk to, and you sigh with the knowledge that no one is going to make your job as simple and leisurely as Gaz just has.

After he leaves, you target Soap. He comes to your office as easily as Gaz, but he’s significantly more difficult to photograph.

He just keeps smiling, no matter how many times you tell him to quit it. 

“It’s a personnel file photograph, not a photo for your Instagram.” You sigh, irritated. “I need you to have a blank, neutral expression. It’s like a passport photo, Sergeant. It’s for a government document.”

“Can’t help it, lass.” Soap says easily, that stupid grin not even dimming. “I see a camera, I smile. It’s muscle memory.”

You think that your irritation is only encouraging him, which only worsens your mood. In the end, you don’t get a single usable photograph of him for his file. You have to give up on him, swearing that you’ll come get him to try again later. He leaves your office still chuckling, like he thinks your frustration is cute.

You have tougher targets to tackle.

The difficult part isn’t even taking Ghost’s photo — the difficult part is catching him in the first place.

You spend almost three hours trying to track him down (because he won’t read your texts and your phone calls go unanswered), wobbling all over base in your stupid high heels and somehow missing him by mere moments every time. You arrive in the gym, the mess, the firing range, even the barracks, only to see the man’s enormous broad back disappearing out of the other door as soon as you get there.

You can only assume that Soap had given Ghost the heads up that you were on the prowl with a mission and a camera, because the lieutenant is avoiding you like the goddamn plague.

So yeah. You’re in a real bad fucking mood. But you can’t help it — some days your job is entirely thankless, and your mood drops so low that you feel like going home and crying. But you can’t, and you don’t want to show weakness in front of these military idiots, so all you can do is lock your jaw and go about your business the best you can.

You go back to your office, jaw and fists clenched tight, and collapse at your desk with your head in your hands. You have to take a few deep, slow breaths to try and calm yourself, but then you make the mistake of checking your reflection and your mood sinks lower again when you see that the stupid pimple on your chin has worsened.

God, this is just not your day. You have to get these stupid files updated, or it’ll fall on your head. 

Eventually, you reluctantly stand up. There’s no point moping; you have a job to do, whether you like it or not, and your next victim is Captain Price.

You walk to Price’s office swiftly, your feet aching in your stupid heels. You wish you had worn something more sensible, but… well. Even subconsciously, you want to impress.

When you reach his office, you throw the door open and march inside without even bothering to knock. 

Price is sitting behind his desk, and his head snaps up as soon as you walk in. His expression is set in a hard scowl, though it softens when he sees who it is. You guess you don’t exactly pose much of a threat, so he sees no use in posturing.

“I need you for a moment.” You bite out, allowing the door to slam shut behind you.

You hear Price sigh, before he leans back and settles into his chair, making himself comfortable. He’s wearing the same dark compression shirt that he usually wears for training exercises or to the gym, and he’s recently groomed his beard down too. He looks good, though it takes a colossal amount of effort for you to not notice, because you have other things you need to focus on right now.

“Hello to you too, love.” He grunts, wiping a hand over his eyes. “What’s the problem?”

You struggle not to react to that, his low voice both soothing and igniting something in your blood. You take a breath, try to calm down. You’re a professional, and you’re not here to embarrass yourself in front of the captain.

“I’m updating personnel files,” You say, and this time it comes out calm and steady, “I need to take a picture of you.”

Price’s gaze lingers on you, his stern brow softening a little. For a moment, you think that maybe this is actually going to be easy. That he’ll just stand up and take the fucking picture, so that the two of you can go back to your jobs and relax for the rest of the day.

But then–

“Jesus, kid.” He sighs, already shaking his head. “I’m up to my eyes right now. Leave it ‘till tomorrow.”

For a moment, you don’t react at all. You just stare at him, letting those dismissive words settle over you. He’s already looking back at his paperwork, mission briefings and maps littering the desk, and you feel so effectively dismissed. You feel small, so silly and stupid standing in front of him in a way that you haven’t felt since you first started working with the task force. You had thought that you were past this, that you had earned some meagre sort of respect from him.

“I need it done today.” You say, and your voice comes out a little hollow to your own ears.

You don’t need male validation. You don’t. But damn, you’ve had a rough day and the fact that your captain isn’t even bothering to look at you makes you want to cry.

Price sighs, and rubs at the crease between his eyes. He looks just as tired as you feel.

“Yeah, well. I don’t have time. Tomorrow.”

You swallow, pursing your lips. He’s so effortlessly dominant, which means that his careless dismissal stings all the more.

“I have to get the whole team done,” You say, struggling to keep your voice firm. “Soap wouldn’t stop smiling for the camera, I couldn’t find Farah anywhere, and Ghost–”

Price gives a sharp, derisive snort. “Forget Ghost.”

You scowl. “I need to do the whole squad.”

“Not Ghost.” Price repeats, this time slower and with more emphasis. “Simon doesn’t do photos.”

You take a deep breath, trying to stay calm. You’ve been working alongside the task force for a while now, and you’re familiar with Lieutenant Riley’s penchant for covering his face. It’s not something you have a problem with – usually.

“There’s no reason for him to be the exception to personnel photos, Captain.” You say through gritted teeth. “Everyone else is being photographed. The task force might be covert, but Lieutenant Riley is no more–”

“Christ, enough.” Price snaps, his voice a deep boom that has your mouth closing with a click. “The One Four One is my squad, in case you’ve forgotten. I know these lads, and I’m telling you to leave it out.”

You stare, a little taken aback by the harshness in his voice. He hasn’t been this sharp with you in months, not since you had started to prove yourself competent, useful. Now, you can see the warning signs of his bad mood; the circles under his eyes are pronounced, his skin dull in the ugly fluorescent lights of his office. He looks exhausted, his skin lined and dry like he hasn’t been drinking enough water.

You realise, a little too late, that you might have been pushing your luck by insisting on something as silly as personnel file photos. TF 141 had only returned from deployment at the beginning of the week, and Price has no doubt been drowning in reports since.

“This is why I told Laswell you weren’t necessary,” His snarl is entirely unlike him, and he rubs his face furiously, his palms rasping through his beard. “I don’t need someone coming in here and making demands of my squad for– for fucking photographs.”

You inhale shakily through your nose; to your utter horror, you can feel your eyes burn with hot wet tears. It’s stupid – you’ve dealt with far crueller words from far harsher men. The nature of your job often puts you in the firing line for frustration, and when it bubbles over it’s frequently directed at you. 

But this… this feels different, for some reason. You’ve been working your ass off to try and earn some recognition from Price, to show him that you’re a valuable asset to the team, and so his sharp, frustrated dismissal of you cuts deeper than it should.

You hate that your eyes are burning like this. You don’t want Price to think of you as useless, or as the silly little girl who was put on the team by the brass who can’t even do her job right. He was just starting to think of you as competent, and it hurts your ego to have to go to him for help with something that you should be more than capable of handling yourself in the first place.

“Right,” You say, and even you’re startled by the sharpness in your tone. “Fine. Forget the file updates, then.”

You step forward, jaw clenched hard, and toss the files you’ve been carrying around all day onto his desk. They hit the surface with a smack that feels uncomfortably loud in the tense silence that’s fallen over the room.

“I’ll tell the higher-ups that you’re handling it.” You continue, your voice coming out brattier than you’d like. “Since obviously I have no idea what I’m doing–”

“Oh, don’t do that.” Price sighs, as though you’re the one being unreasonable. “What I’m saying is, if you’re going to work with the team, you have to understand the team–”

That, you think, might just push you over the edge.

“Do you think I’m stupid?” You snap out, and Price’s mouth closes. “D’you think I’m– that I’m some kind of idiot?”

Price blinks. It seems like you’ve managed to take him by surprise, as though your bad mood rivals his just enough to pull him out of his own grumpy form entirely. He opens his mouth again, but you’re not ready to hear him speak again just yet.

“I’m here because Laswell put in a request for me to work with you and your squad, Captain. I’m considered an asset to the teams that I work with,” You’re scowling thunderously, all the tension and frustration that’s been mounting all day spilling over. “And I don’t have to put up with being dismissed and unappreciated when I know that I would be respected in other squads for the work that I do.”

Price raises his hands, a frown creasing his brow. “Kid, that’s not–”

Usually, being called ‘kid’ by Price has a warm glow settling in your stomach that you’re absolutely not interested in examining, but this time it only lights an infuriated fire in your belly. 

“Don’t!” You snap, your breath juddering unsteadily. “God, you think I enjoy being treated like an idiot? You think I haven’t had to deal with this from men my whole career? My whole life? Even my father–”

To your abject horror, a lump forms in your throat and you can’t finish that sentence. Your eyes are hot with unshed tears, and you’re pretty sure your lip is trembling. 

Price stands, his stern expression slackening into something like uncomfortable surprise as he moves to step around the desk.

“Hey,” He soothes, lifting his hands. “I’m not your father.”

“I know that!” You snap, irate. You’re frustrated with yourself, embarrassed at what you’ve unintentionally given away. “I wouldn’t want you to be!”

Price’s expression flickers, as though he can’t decide quite how to react to you. You’re more than aware that you’re being childish, but you find yourself unable to temper your overreactions. In the face of your tears and your frustrated anger, Price looks like he’s at a loss.

“All I’ve done is work hard, and tried to take the burden off you to make your job a little easier.” You continue before he can interrupt again. “And all I get in return is stress, and my chocolate biscuits eaten, and breakouts, and– and–”

“Kid–”

“The only person who wasn’t an absolute dickhead to me today was Garrick,” You rage, on a roll now. “Everyone else has just been so– and look how bad my skin has gotten from the stress of having to deal with men who want to act like children–”

Price watches you with an expression that is plainly bewildered as you gesture at the stupid pimple that’s been throbbing on your chin all day. You don’t even think you’re making sense, too lost in your frustration and humiliation to be properly aware of what you’re saying. 

“Your… skin.” He repeats, a little disbelieving. 

You whirl away, agitated. You’re not getting your point across well, and Price must think you’re simply demented. 

“Hey,” He says slowly, approaching from around the side of his desk. “I didn’t mean to suggest that you weren’t doing a decent job–”

“Whatever.” You mutter, running your hands over your skirt in an attempt to straighten out the creases. “Whatever.”

It’s too little, too late. He’s always been a bit of a hardass, and you’ve always tried so hard to please him, to impress him. But you can’t bear to make a fool of yourself like this any longer.

“I’ll leave the paperwork to you. Update it, or don’t. It doesn’t matter.” You say shortly, turning on your heel and marching towards the door.

“Wait,” Price calls out. His voice is firm, echoing with the grim certainty of a man who is used to being obeyed.

But you’re not one of his soldiers, and his command falls on deaf ears. Your skin is still prickling with humiliation; you don’t think you’ve ever been so desperate to get away from the Captain before.

“Sweetheart, just wait a minute,” Price says, and this time you can hear the exasperation in his voice. “I understand that you’re stressed, that’s normal. Everyone gets stressed in this line of work. But you can’t just go and get your knickers in a twist because some of the lads are bein’ difficult–”

“My knickers are none of your business!” You yell. Truthfully, it’s more of a shriek, high-pitched and unsteady enough to have Price’s eyes widening and darting towards the door as though worried about someone overhearing from the corridor.

“Whoa, okay,” Price says with the air of trying to soothe a spooked horse. “You're right. Your... knickers... ain't my concern. But helping keep this squad running smoothly is, and that can't happen if my admin is on edge."

“Oh, give me a break!” You’re beyond on-edge now, sailing right into fury. “You ignore me most of the time when you're not on deployment, you dismiss me when I’m just trying to do my job, but now you’re telling me you need me to not be on edge?”

You’ve reached the door now, your hand clenched tight around the doorhandle as you take one last moment to turn and look at him. He’s stepping towards you, no doubt with the intent to stop you before you can leave, but you don’t plan on giving him the chance.

“Kid, just hang on a damn minute–”

“Sort the files yourself, or do whatever you want.” You bite out, yanking the door open but pausing in the doorway. “I don’t even care anymore. It’s your squad, you do it.”

Price takes a breath, visibly fighting for patience. Truthfully, you don’t know how he hasn’t lost his head with you already. He was already exhausted and in an obviously bad mood when you had stormed in here, and it couldn’t be more obvious that you’ve just made it worse with all of your frenzied anger and borderline hysteria. 

The fact that Price is staying calm and level even in the face of your stress-induced meltdown only makes you feel all the more ridiculous. You wish he would get angry, that he would snap at you like he had when you had first walked in – at least that way you could pretend that you don’t notice the way his stressed scowl had melted into a look of concern as soon as he had seen the tears welling up in your stinging eyes.

“And you don’t have to wear that stupid hat, we’re indoors!” You yell, your voice teetering on the edge of hysteria.

You just have enough time to see his hand reach up to touch the brim of his boonie hat before you hurriedly bolt out of the room, escaping into the corridor before he can stop you.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ

“— just thinking that maybe I’d be better suited with another team, that’s all. I heard Kortac’s liaison is approaching maternity leave—”

“That position is going to be filled internally,” Laswell’s voice is calm over the secure phoneline, a stark contrast to the shaky undertone of stress in your own. “Besides, organising a transfer like that is more trouble than it’s worth.” There’s a pause, then a sigh crackles over the phone. “You still haven’t explained what happened. As far as I can see, you were doing good work there.”

Yeah, you think sourly, because all you see is the paperwork end of it.

“... Internal conflict.” You mutter, playing with the fraying edge of your sweater sleeve. 

There’s a long pause, protracted enough that it makes you squirm. You know what she’s thinking – in your line of work, it’s impossible to avoid clashing with some of the big dominant personalities who are used to getting away with whatever they want. But you’ve always been able to handle it, well-versed enough in diplomacy to know when to stand your ground and when to bow out to avoid unnecessary strife. 

“Internal conflict.” Laswell repeats, her voice as bland as you’ve ever heard it. “Meaning?”

God, it feels like you’re disappointing your mom or something. You scrub a hand over your face, pacing in the living room of your small apartment.

“I know how it sounds,” You say, “But– they don’t want to work with me. There’s only so much I can do if I’m being met with resistance at every corner–”

“You’ve worked with resistant squads before,” Laswell interrupts. “It’s part of the job.”

“Yes, but…” You start, before trailing off. 

She has a point, of course. It is part of the job. There’s no way to professionally explain to your superior that the reason this assignment is so difficult is because you have a mortifying crush on the Captain of the Task Force. It’s making you stupid, making all the stupid bullshit that you’re usually able to look past feel so much worse, especially because all you’ve ever wanted was Price’s approval.

Another sigh. This one, at least, sounds a little more sympathetic.

“Look,” Laswell says, and this time her voice is a little gentler. “I’ve never given you an assignment that I didn’t think you could handle. Whatever is going on, you need to sort it. You’re a capable girl, and the One Four One is far from the most difficult team you’ve had to deal with. There might be some big personalities there, but nothing that you shouldn’t be able to tackle.”

“Mhm.” You grunt noncommittally.

“Sort out whatever’s going on with you.” Laswell’s tone leaves no room for argument, her suggestion falling just short of a command. “If whatever issues you’re experiencing continue, I’ll talk to John–”

“No!” You blurt.

God, you can’t think of anything worse. You’ve already made a show of yourself in front of him, the last thing you need is for him to learn that you’ve gone crying to Laswell about the whole thing. You don’t want him to think of you as any more of a useless little girl than he doubtlessly already does.

“No,” You repeat, calmer this time as you clear your throat. “I’ll… sort it. Sorry to bother you with this, ma’am.”

Laswell hums, and you can imagine her eyes narrowing. Judging by the wind whistling in the background of the call, she’s not anywhere near her cushy office. You’ve interrupted her on whatever assignment she’s on, and she’s been kind enough to listen to your silly little complaints for at least fifteen minutes of her valuable time. You feel more ridiculous than ever, and you pinch at the bridge of your nose.

“... Right.” She says. “Fine. Keep me updated on the situation. I want a sitrep by the end of the week, understood?”

“Yes, ma’am.” 

You understand what’s not being said. Laswell expects you to work your own shit out, but you can hear the concern in her voice when she demands an update. All you can do is agree. Laswell has been by your side throughout your whole career, always having a hand in your assignments and your progression, and she’s always been an advocate for you and what you’re capable of. Now, after this conversation, you feel silly for getting so overwhelmed in the face of what is a relatively minor obstacle.

“Good. I’ll speak to you then.”

You hum, wish her goodbye and good luck, and hang up the phone.

For a long moment afterwards, you sit in silence in your living room. God, how did all of this spiral into such a mess?

For the last few days, you’ve been avoiding the base entirely. You have a few PTO days built up, and you’ve taken the opportunity to just chill out. It’s the first chance you’ve had to relax properly in months, since you had started working with the task force. The space is good, and it’s needed.

You get out of the headspace of work, and reports, and files and requisitions and debriefs, and instead treat yourself with full body self-care. You exfoliate, you moisturise, you use a hair mask, you take bubble baths. You even catch up on the trashy Netflix romance series that you had put on hold for ages, just waiting for some free time to indulge.

And you almost, almost, forget about why you’re hiding away in your little flat in the first place.

But your third day off creeps around, and you can’t help but feel as though your little bubble of isolation is about to pop. There’s only so much time away from the office that you’re able to swing, and the longer away the more you feel that your position on the team is untenable. No matter how you currently feel about the task force and your place with them, you’re not willing to let your hard work go down the drain just because you’re too cowardly to face them again after your little meltdown.

So, you go back to work after your little break away.

You manage to slink into your office mostly unseen, other than polite hello’s from other admin staff as you slip through the halls. Your office is far from prime real estate when it comes to office space on base – it’s well out of the way, down several corridors that no one ever goes down, and once you get past the main thoroughfares you don’t come across anyone. Even still, it feels a little like you’re doing a walk of shame, but you walk with your head held high before you finally get your office door closed behind you. 

To your surprise, your desk is clear. Typically, any slight break away from your desk results in work piling up on it, just waiting for your attention once you get back. You don’t know what to make of the absence of work; you can’t help but wonder, somewhat uncomfortably, if Price had taken your words to heart and dealt with all of the paperwork himself.

You check the drawers of your desk too, just in case, and come up empty yet again. 

Well. Okay, then. 

You sign into your desktop, waiting for the encryption program to load before accessing your emails. There’s a lot to catch up on, so you spend the next hour or so organising your to-do list in order of urgency.

You get lost in making your little lists, allowing yourself to relax into finding order in your schedule. You barely even look up until there’s a soft knock on your office door, and by the time you’ve raised your head the door has opened and Farah has slipped inside.

“Oh,” You straighten up in surprise. “Commander. What can I do for you?”

It’s a surprise to see her, especially since you hadn’t received any email correspondence. Your office is tucked away down a remote corridor, and soldier’s usually prefer to just email you their requests rather than make the trek down.

Farah offers a polite smile, approaching your desk. “I hear you are taking photographs.”

Your smile slips a little. “Oh. No, actually, I wasn’t–”

“Captain Price said I was to be photographed,” She says, pulling the chair out opposite you and watching you expectantly. “I tried to find you yesterday, and the day before, but I believe you weren't on base.”

You shift, feeling abruptly rather awkward. “Right. I was– Price said that to you?”

“Mhm.” Farah leans back in the chair, her dark eyes alert as they track over your face. “He said that you have been stressed.”

You feel your face heat, mortified. Oh, god. How embarrassing. Has Price given the team a goddamn debrief on your little meltdown? Farah tilts her head as though she knows what you’re thinking, and a tiny smile quirks at the corner of her lips.

“That’s all he said,” She says. “That, and that we should try to make your job a little easier.”

“Oh.” You shift, embarrassed and awkward. “I– Listen, I had a… rough day at work a few days ago, that’s all. I’m not– things are fine.”

Farah just nods as though that’s perfectly convincing, and you find yourself wildly appreciative of her for a moment.

“So, then,” She says, and raises her eyebrows. “The picture?”

You can’t find a way to explain that you had thrown that particular responsibility right back at Price in a fit of pique, but it turns out you don’t have to. Farah produces a slim folder that you hadn’t noticed her holding, and you realise with another flush of embarrassment that it’s her personnel file.

“There wasn’t much to update, just a recent blood work test.” She says as she lays it on your desk. 

“That’s… thanks.” You say weakly, taking the file in hand. You flick through it briefly, feeling something in your stomach squirm at the sight of Farah’s details all filled in – Price’s handwriting is unmistakable, the small neat blocky letters standing out amongst the messy scrawl of Farah’s medical report.

You dig out your camera, still a little flustered, and direct Farah to stand against your plain white-painted wall. She’s an easy subject to photograph; she stands perfectly still, unsmiling, and you get the perfect picture after only a couple of attempts.

“Lovely,” You murmur, flicking through the pictures. “Thank you.”

Farah hums. You’re expecting her to dismiss herself, and it takes a moment for you to realise that she’s still lingering. You glance up, blinking, only to find that she’s standing with her lips pursed, obviously considering something.

“The Captain is worried about you.” She says, as though it’s the most natural thing in the world. “Is everything alright?”

You gape at her like a moron, camera still hanging loosely from your hands. You feel uncomfortably seen; there’s no way that Farah could know what happened, but she’s looking at you with an awful lot of sympathy right now.

“What?” You squeak.

“You fought?” Farah speaks slowly, obviously conscious of overstepping her boundaries. “I don’t mean to pry, it’s just…”

“No, that’s okay.” You say hastily. “We didn’t– there was no fighting, exactly.”

She just nods, as if you’re making perfect sense, then smiles politely. She gathers herself up and steps towards the door, and you feel your head spinning as she turns to go. 

“You look tired,” Farah murmurs, low enough that you almost miss it. “When Price wants to fix things, let him.”

“Mhm.” You nod quickly without really hearing her. You’re pretty sure you’d agree to anything right now just to escape the knowing intensity of Farah’s gaze. “Yeah, of course.”

After Farah leaves, you feel like you need another day off. It’s all you can do to just sit in your comfortably padded office chair and groan like a moron, because Jesus Christ you’ve made such a mess of things. 

It was bad enough when you were pining like an idiot from afar; you’ve had crushes before, and you know that you would have outgrown it eventually. But then you had your stupid little meltdown in front of Price, and revealed more than you intended, and all of a sudden you’ve made yourself into a fool in front of the squad you’ve tried so hard to impress these last few months.

You have to try hard not to spiral. In fact, it’s a challenge not to cave and grab your phone to call Laswell all over again to demand a reassignment right this second. You have a pretty good idea of what she’d say to you in response, but still, the impulse remains.

All you can do is put it from your mind. You potter about, printing Farah’s photograph so you can tuck it neatly into her file with a paperclip, and then decide to start replying to the many emails that have built up in your absence.

The emails vary in tone, from polite enquiries to not-so-polite demands for you to solve some administrative issues, and you sigh quietly as you respond to some of the more snotty messages from upper management. And if you’re a little bit passive aggressive, then you don’t think anyone can blame you.

Your mind has finally quietened, focusing on your work as the buzz of your thoughts settle down, when another knock sounds out from your door. This one is firmer than Farah’s soft knock from earlier, and a little louder, though this time you don’t look up from your screen.

“Come in.” You call, chewing at your lip as you struggle to keep the wording of your email civil.

You’re half-expecting it to be Soap this time around, or maybe one of the recruits hoping to get you to sign off on their leave. So when you finally glance up only to catch sight of the broad, thick-shouldered figure of Captain Price stepping into your office, you think you might go into cardiac arrest.

Email abandoned, you half jolt to your feet before changing your mind mid-movement and attempting to sit back down. It ends up being a humiliating sort of jerky motion, and you pray that he somehow missed it entirely.

“Captain.” You wheeze, your voice coming out a little weak.

Price’s cool blue eyes dart over your face and then down the length of your body, and you become suddenly, mortifyingly aware of the state you’re in. You might not want to admit it, but your wardrobe definitely changes when the Captain isn’t on deployment. Instead of professional trousers, you wear your tight knee-length pencil skirts and fitted shirts, and totter around in your heels. And it’s silly, but… well, you can’t help but notice the way Price’s eyes follow you when you dress like that, and you like his attention on you.

Except today, you hadn’t been planning on running into Price. You hadn’t planned on seeing anyone, so you had dressed for comfort — you’re wearing a pair of frumpy grey wool trousers and a super over-sized soft purple sweater that practically swallows you whole. You haven’t even done your hair nicely, and you curse yourself. This has to be the least sexy you’ve looked in months.

“D’you’ve a moment, love?” 

His voice seems loud in the quiet of your office, even though realistically you know he’s only speaking in a murmur. In the quiet days you’ve spent alone in your apartment, you’d almost forgotten how lovely and low and gruff his voice is, and you feel your toes curl in your shoes at the sound of it.

It’s not as though you can refuse him, though you’re already embarrassingly aware of the way in which you had stormed off the last time you had seen him.

“Yeah.” You swallow thickly in an attempt to strengthen your voice, but it still comes out high and thready. “Sure.”

As if he had just been waiting for permission, Price steps into the room properly and closes the door behind him. All of a sudden, the room feels a little claustrophobic. Price is a big man, broad-shouldered and thickly built with a soft layer of fat cushioning those hard muscles, and you can’t help but feel as though his presence is sucking all of the air out of the room.

But still, he approaches slowly, like you’re some kind of feral cat. Those sharp eyes of his are still tracking over you; he never misses a beat, and you know that he’s taking stock of you in the same way he would for an enemy out on the field. You feel raw, uncomfortably vulnerable. You find yourself wishing wildly and ridiculously that you had worn your usual fitted shirt and pencil skirt, or at least put on a bit of makeup.

“You look rested.” He notes, coming to a slow stop just in front of your desk.

You suddenly curse your last minute choice to stay seated, because now Price’s big body is towering over you in a way that’s honestly making your head swim a little.

“Yeah.” Your voice is a little hoarse. “I guess.”

Price nods, inhales through his nose. A moment passes before he clears his throat and reaches out to place a handful of files on your desk. Despite the plain manila envelopes, you recognise them for what they are almost immediately; the personnel files for 141.

“Finished ‘em off for you while you were gone.” He says gruffly, as though it were no big deal. “Nearly had to nail Soap down to a chair for that damn photo.”

You stare at the files for a long moment, making no move to open them. You find yourself totally, utterly lost for words. 

“This is–” You start to say, and truthfully you’re not sure where you’re going with that. You think you’re about to thank him, but he doesn’t really give you the chance to.

“Why don’t we talk?” He says, and motions to the dinky little couch in the corner of the room as if he owns it.

You hesitate a moment, a little peeved about the effortless way he takes command in your own office, but relent and push yourself up from the desk. You don’t make eye contact with Price as you step around him, walking to the corner, but you can feel his eyes on you all the same.

 The couch had come with the office, and you don’t even really want to think about how old it is, but you sink down awkwardly onto it anyway. The cushions are worn and threadbare and the springs creak gratingly when you settle your weight onto it, but it’s fine. It does the job.

You’re half-expecting Price to drag the spare chair at your desk over so he can sit opposite you – you’re not expecting him to step right up next to you before he drops down next to you, sighing as his thick thighs spread wide.

You barely bite back a squeak, a little bewildered. You’re not surprised that he’s asked to talk to you. Your behaviour had been wildly inappropriate, and you couldn’t exactly protest if he’s decided to caution you or something.

But you had expected it to be a more formal affair; sitting together on the pathetic, dingy little couch in your office feels entirely too casual for the dressing down you’re sure you’re about to receive.

“Think we’re due a discussion about the other day.” He says, gentler than you had been expecting.

You avoid his eyes, though you can feel his stare boring into the side of your face. Ugh. Time to eat humble pie, you think miserably. 

“I’m sorry, sir.” You keep your voice as dispassionate and prim as possible. “My behaviour was unprofessional and entirely unacceptable, and I have no excuse. It won’t happen again, I assure you.”

It’s as professional an apology as you can manage, and you chance a quick side glance at him to see his reaction. Your stomach sinks when you see that his brow is creased in a frown, and you panic a little at the realisation that your apology hasn’t helped matters at all.

“Well,” His voice is gruff enough to elicit a little shiver from you. “I wasn’t–” He clears his throat. “I wasn’t looking for an apology.”

That finally makes you turn properly, your eyes darting nervously over his face. He’s already watching you, his blue eyes searing under the brim of his stupid hat. He’s trimmed his beard since the last time you saw him; the salt and pepper bristles of his moustache and chops are neat and shortened. He looks good, though you try not to notice. He doesn’t look as dehydrated or drained as he did a few days ago either, though he still leans into the couch with an air of quiet exhaustion.

“Paperwork has never been my favourite thing in the world,” He confesses with an air of chagrin that’s painfully endearing to you. “Always found it a pain, to be honest. Puts me right out of sorts. I was… short with you, the other day.”

You frown, making yourself small on the couch. “You said I wasn’t necessary.”

Price winces, then reaches up and pulls his boonie hat off his head so that he can drag a hand over his short-cropped hair. Though you had insulted it only the other day, it strikes you as odd to see him with a bare head.

“Shouldn’t have said that.” He mumbles, resting his elbows on his knees and letting his hat hang from his hands. “You’ve been great these last few months. Don’t know what I’d have done without you, sometimes.”

You’re stupid. It’s the only reason you can think of to explain the way blood rushes to your head and turns your face hot, your whole body going hot and prickly in response to his low praise. You fidget, glance away, and pray he doesn’t notice. 

“You know I’m no good at deskwork,” He says, and leans in a little closer like he thinks you’re not listening properly. “Don’t have the head for it. I think you’re the reason the team runs so smoothly in the first place, love.”

The flattery is being laid on a little too thick, but it works. You fall for it entirely, a warm glow settling over you like a blanket, wrapping around you tight and soothing the jagged edges of your anger and anxiety. You hate that you’re so easy to appease, a couple of sweet compliments and assurances falling from your Captain’s lips assuaging all that upset that you’ve been carrying around with you for days now.

But still, part of you isn’t quite willing to let go of the sting, the hurt that his words and his harsh tone had caused. 

“Is this you apologising, then?” You ask, watching him from the corner of your eye.

He smiles, close-mouthed. “Yeah. It is. Not doin’ too good, am I?”

“You’re doing okay.” You murmur, before deciding to try to be a bit cheeky. “But you can keep going, if you’d like.”

Price laughs, rich and warm and low. You don’t think you’ve ever actually heard him laugh in all the months you’ve been working with the task force, and the sound of it rumbles right into your bones, settling something inside of you and finally allowing you to relax. No longer tense with stress, you melt a little into the corner of the couch.

“Shouldn’t have snapped at you,” He says slowly. “You do good work. Great work. You shouldn’t feel like you’re not a valued member of the team.”

You swallow thickly. You feel too warm, your head swimming a little. His attention feels too heavy, heating your blood and going straight to your head.

“I overreacted,” You mumble reluctantly. “I shouldn’t… your hat isn’t stupid.”

That gets another bark of laughter out of Price, and he slaps a hand down onto your knee. The contact makes you jolt, eyes widening, but Price’s hand doesn’t shift. His palm is so large, spread across your thigh as his fingers curl over your knee. The touch feels almost scorching even through the thick fabric of your trousers.

All of a sudden, your tongue feels very thick in your mouth. The hand on your knee is not in any way suggestive; it’s chaste, innocent, just resting there like a reminder that he wants your attention on him (as if it could be anywhere else). But your nerves are jangling all of a sudden, every one of your senses straining towards him as you hold your breath.

“The hat isn’t the problem,” Price mutters, though you barely hear him. “I wanted to ask you about something else you said, love. Something you said about your father.”

That has some of the heat in your veins cooling, your eyes blowing wide. “I– what?”

To your bewilderment, Price’s cheeks have reddened beneath the whiskers of his beard and moustache. Despite his clear chagrin, he doesn’t break eye contact with you, his thick fingers squeezing cautiously around your knee. 

“Don’t mean to overstep,” He assures you quietly. “And– and don’t mind me if I’m talkin’ nonsense. But I know that you’ve been working so hard, and you’ve got a tough job. Can’t be easy. And I just wanted to say that if you'd like some… guidance – someone to steer you on the right path, that is– well, that I’m here if you ever want to talk."

Oh god. You feel your mouth go dry. 

It’s funny, because even though Price isn’t even yet forty, he’s always seemed so much older. Maybe it’s the weight of the responsibility that he carries on his shoulders, or the battle-hardened icy blue eyes, or the paternal sense of protectiveness that he shows over his team. He’s always been like an almost father figure for the squad, regardless of age; you’ve seen the way he’s so protective over Ghost, the way he claps Soap on the back or shoulders in praise to boost him up, the way he beams with pride when Farah excels, the way he always makes time to guide or give advice to Gaz.

It’s sweet. He’s always been sweet, so aware of the personalities on his team, even when he’s acting like that typical military authority figure. 

"Sounds like you want to be my daddy." You mean to say it in a derogatory fashion, laughing as though it's ridiculous, though when it comes out you can hear that it’s missing some of the sarcasm you had intended.

Price reacts instantly. He reels back, eyes widening, the pink in his cheeks flares into a deep red flush, and you see his chest heave as his breath catches. You hadn’t been expecting a reaction like this; Price looks as though the words have hit him like a physical slap.

“Jesus. That’s not–” He says, and the gravelly hoarseness in his voice is a shock. “That’s not what I meant.”

There’s a moment of charged silence. Fuck, what have you done? Why would you say that? Why would you say that, to the captain of your task force? Hadn’t you embarrassed yourself enough in front of him the day you had had your silly little meltdown? It’s like you just can’t keep your damn mouth shut around him, like your brain turns to mush the second he looks at you and you just lose the run of yourself.

“I’m sorry.” You blurt. “I shouldn’t have said that. I don’t know what– I didn’t mean it.”

The next silence is even worse than the last, tension humming between you like a live wire. He’s so close to you that his scent fills your nose – a blend of sweet cigar smoke, sharp gunpowder, and a heady masculine musk. You feel so fucking stupid, and more than a little panicked. You don’t think you could survive the humiliation of having to call Laswell and beg for a reassignment twice in one day just because you’ve completely humiliated yourself in front of the Captain again.

Price swallows, the sound painfully loud in the silence.

“Right.” He says slowly, before coughing roughly to clear his throat. “Mm. ‘Course. I didn’t mean to– perhaps I overstepped. Since you mentioned your father–”

“I don’t want to talk about my father.” You say swiftly.

God, you feel like your issues are out on display with a big damn spotlight. You feel so pathetic, so damn pitiful, as though your desperate need for approval and affection from an older male authority figure is written across your forehead.

But if your issues are on display, then so are Price’s, because you can’t help but notice that the vibrant red flush on his cheeks hasn’t faded. If anything, that deep flush has spread down his throat and over his chest; you can see how the skin that’s stretched over his pectoral muscles is glowing crimson beneath his shirt.

A niggling boldness begins to creep in, and you find yourself straightening on the couch. You turn, bring one of your legs up on the couch so that you can turn your whole body towards him, one of your elbows resting on the back cushion of the couch. 

Price’s eyes sharpen when your body turns towards him, and his body draws tense. Those cool blue eyes dart over you, and you’re surprised to see heat in them despite your oversized purple jumper and unflattering wool trousers. The whisper of his fatigues brushing against the fabric of your own trousers is both a distraction and an invitation, your thighs sliding surreptitiously against each other.

“What if I did mean it?” You blurt out before your courage can flee you.

Price goes so still it looks preternatural, even the breaths in his chest slowing. 

“Kid.” He says, and it sounds like a warning.

You don’t heed it, adjusting yourself so that you’re shuffling closer yet again. You don’t think you’ve ever been so close to him, his scent and his body and his heated gaze filling up your consciousness until he’s all that you’re aware of.

“What if I meant it?” You ask again, the whisper coming out low but charged. 

Price takes a breath that sounds like a groan, and it surprises you. You hadn’t expected that reaction; it sends a trickle of heated desire running down your spine, and you’re startled by how much you want him in this moment.

“D’you know what you’re asking for?” He asks, the gravel in his voice flooding wet heat between your legs. 

His carefully laced words linger in the space between you, daring you to accept, to shred the formal boundary that looms between the two of you. You get the sense that you’re walking a fine line here, that you’re getting close to the point of no return. 

“Yes.” You breathe, although you’re not entirely sure that you do know what you’re asking for. All you know is that he’s so close, and he’s staring at you with an expression of such hunger that it’s making you feel weak.

Price moves fast for such a big man, and all you can do is let out a soft sound of surprise when one of his big hands wraps around the back of your neck to pull you in. A deep, guttural sound escapes him when his lips crash into yours, his mouth demanding and greedy.

It feels like you go both lax and rigid simultaneously, before you positively light up. The hand that Price has wrapped around the back of your neck keeps you grounded, and before you can stop yourself you’re burrowing closer. It feels like the tension, your childish argument, the sexual friction – everything has culminated to this electrifying moment, where Price’s full lips are consuming yours, the hair of his beard rubbing over your cheeks and chin and keeping your nerves straining towards him.

The kiss doesn’t start out slow; it skips straight to hungry, fast and dirty, with Price’s big hands on your hip and the back of your neck, holding and guiding you. Overwhelming. 

Price’s big fucking body is leaning in, caging you against the couch. The wide shoulders and barrel-chested mass of him pressing you into the cushions is just short of breath-taking, but it’s not enough. You want to be right up against him, under his skin.

You swing your leg over Price’s, and climb up into his lap. His thighs are thick beneath you, wide and muscled, but you’re still hesitant to fully settle your weight against him. You just want to be closer, to feel the heat of him pressed against you, but the second you start moving Price grabs at your hips and pulls you down properly, uncaring of your weight.

“I’ve been–” You manage to say in between kisses, your words muffled and a little wet. “I’ve been working my ass off, for the squad, for you, and you never say or do anything–”

Price grunts, grappling with his sudden lapful of you. His eyes meet yours, and in them, you think you might see the spark of admiration, for your brave stupidity if nothing else. 

“Sh, I know,” He says as he grips at your hips under your oversized jumper, encouraging you to settle down your full weight on his thighs. “I know, love, you’ve been working so hard. What would I do without you, huh?”

And the thing is, you’re a very capable woman. You’ve had to be, in order to survive in your line of work. You know that you’re capable, you know that you do good work, you know that you help keep the wheels greased and everything moving behind the scenes for the 141, but even still, Price’s praise sinks into you like warm honey.

“Watching you walk around in those tight little skirts, Christ.” He hums, and his big palms land on your ass and squeeze there suggestively. “And those heels– completely impractical for a military base like this.”

You wheeze a laugh, clutching at his shoulders. It feels completely surreal that you’re currently perched in your Captain’s lap, with his big shovel-like hands groping your bum as he nips at your lips and confesses that he’s been watching you. It goes straight to your head, makes you dizzy, makes you wish wildly that you had worn one of those skirts for him today.

Oh, you could get used to this. Realistically you know the size difference between you two isn’t that immense, but Price is built like a man whose reality is all war, and when he shifts beneath you his muscles roll, unwittingly showing off his physique. You think you could stay here forever, feeling safe in a big man’s lap, cushioned by his body as he tells you that you’re valuable, and important.

“Fuckin’ hell,” Price groans, nipping at your lower lip before capturing your mouth wholly again. “You’re a handful.”

You’d love to argue that – you like to think that you’re perfectly measured and sensible, after all – but you’re already squirming in his lap, your legs spread wide over his thighs. Arousal pools in your stomach, makes you slick your knickers, and you can’t stop the slow grind your hips trace against his thigh.

Price’s breath shudders out of his chest, and his hands clench tight around your hips. “Hang on a sec,” He breathes, “Hold on. I’m still– I’m still your Captain–”

You think that it’s meant to be a warning, or at least a word of caution about the precarious situation you’re in regarding professionalism and inappropriate workplace relationships. What you’re doing right now is ridiculous, after all. You’re still on base, you’re in your office, and if the two of you get caught you don’t even want to think about the consequences. The fraternisation rule shouldn’t apply here, since you’re only considered part of the team by a mere technicality, but even in your lust-hazed mind you can still recognise that sitting on his lap and kissing like this at your workplace is wildly inappropriate.

But if it is a warning, it doesn’t work. The reminder of his authority only inflames you further, and a quiet whimper is torn from your throat when you rock against his lap.

He swears, and beneath you his cock stirs in his fatigues. You can feel the way it fills out where it’s pressed against the seam of your trousers, right between your legs. You reflexively squish your thighs together, tightening them around his hips.

“Christ,” He grits out like a curse. “Alright, then.”

He moves quickly, his hands secure on your back as he lunges forward, flipping you over so that you’re laying on your back on the shoddy, worn-down couch. You go so easily – 

you’re soft now, pliable and eager to please, and he could direct you anywhere he wanted.

He’s too large to be climbing on top of you on a couch like this, but somehow it doesn’t even matter. Now that he’s above you, holding himself up with those strong arms on either side of your head, he looks down on you with an expression that you don’t know what to make of. His eyes are still intense, but the lines around them are softened as he stares down, his gaze tracing your face. 

“You think I haven’t been looking?” He asks, and his voice isn’t as harsh or gritty as you’d been expecting. It’s softer now, fond, almost. “How could I fuckin’ miss you? Always so pretty, always workin’ so hard. ‘Course I noticed.”

When his fingers creep beneath your big purple jumper, you launch into helping him remove it, eagerly stripping it off so you’re laying in your bra. It’s one of your simple utilitarian ones, and you curse yourself for not wearing a sexier one.

But Price groans at the sight of your simple white cotton as though it’s premium lace. His palms are rough as they trace up your sides, the callouses on his fingers coarse against the soft squishy flesh of your belly. He leans forward and nuzzles at your ear, kissing behind your lobe before scraping his teeth along your jaw until he’s kissing messily at your mouth all over again.

“So gorgeous.” He says, his voice a low rumble that has your nerves buzzing. “I was too mean to you before, wasn’t I? Too harsh, when all you were trying to do was help.”

“Yes.” You whisper, though you feel a little bit petulant for it.

“Let me make up for it, darling,” He whispers back, and it sounds like a plea. “Hm? I’ll show you how good you’ve been.”

You’re nodding before he even finishes, desperate. God, yes. You’re not even sure what it is that he’s offering, but you know that you’ll take anything that he has to give you.

He’s looming over you, so large, as his hands fall to the closure on your work trousers. His fingers are so thick that he fumbles with the delicate button and little zip, and it takes him a couple of tries to pull it open and down. When he’s got it, he shucks your trousers off easily and tosses them aside, then stares down at you in your ugly shapeless underwear as though you’re wearing something else entirely.

Even though you’re laying unclothed and vulnerable, squirming and wanting, Price is so slow to get moving. He doesn’t grab at you, or grope greedily, or take impatiently. He acts as though he’s got all the time in the world, leisurely looking you over as though he’s committing you to memory.

“Need you to say it,” He says, strained like he’s trying to hold himself back. “Need you to say it out loud.”

“Want you to show me how good I’ve been.” You say immediately, your desire leaving no room for shame. “Want you to look after me.”

The request comes out a little bit plaintive, and Price sighs out before ducking his head and kissing you again. He’s so much more affectionate than you had ever imagined, and you feel as though you’re drowning in it. His attention is like a warm blanket, settling every craving you’ve ever had.

“I will,” He breathes like it’s a promise. “Oh, I will.”

His palms are rough and hot as they drag over your skin, deceptively gentle as he reaches your tits and pushes your bra up so that he can knead at the soft flesh there. He doesn’t even bother to unclasp it, impatient enough that shoving the cups up so to free your breasts is enough for him. 

He bends his head down, and licks a stripe over your nipple. His tongue feels scorching against you, like you’re hypersensitive to his touch, and he groans against your skin as though he’s tasting something incredible.

You writhe, hips arching up in search of some kind of friction, but Price doesn’t give it to you. He’s too distracted, peppering dozens of kisses over your tits as though they’re something precious even as his hands coast down your back to grope at your ass again where your plain cotton underwear is riding up.

“So pretty, ain’tcha?” He groans against your chest. “Fuck, even when you were walkin’ around with a face on you like a slapped arse, I thought you were the sweetest fuckin’ thing I’d ever seen.”

“Charming.” You snap, but there’s no anger in your tone anymore. In fact, you don’t think there’s a lick of anger anywhere in your whole body anymore, like Price’s hands and mouth on you have washed it all away.

All the brattiness, and the prickliness of your bad mood, is entirely forgotten now that you’re laid out and squirming beneath him. You can hardly even remember what you had been so stressed and angry with him for.

He finally reaches around to unclasp your bra, then tosses it to the side to let it slump sadly to the floor. His next target is your underwear, pulled from you roughly enough that you think the fabric might tear even as his hands cradle the plush flesh of your ass like it’s a treasure.

“Mm, so gorgeous, princess,” It seems like the name just slips out of his mouth, and you feel your whole body draw tense and hot. “So lovely, and I bet you taste even better than you look… like sugar, my sweet girl.”

Jesus Christ. You think your whole fucking body throbs, blood pounding and nerves straining as you wish so desperately for him to touch you. You can’t handle him talking to you like that, so fondly, as if you haven’t just acted like the biggest brat in the world for several days straight.

You can hardly even reconcile this man with the usual stern, gruff man that acts as your Captain, and you let out a choked whine of bewilderment as he slides down your body.

Your thighs are clamped together, shy under his gaze despite how desperately eager you are. You want this, you want him, but you can’t help but feel so mortified by the vulnerability of being nude beneath him on the couch while his big formidable body is still entirely clothed.

Price’s fingers stroke against your hip, his tone low and rich as his lips find your throat again. You can feel his tongue darting out against your skin, his hunger so palpable now that it’s infectious.

“Let daddy see you,” He croaks against the hollow of your throat. “Spread your legs, sweetheart.”

It’s not like you could ever say no to that. The request sends liquid heat shooting straight to your cunt, making you hot and sticky. You spread your thighs, and feel embarrassment flare when there’s a squelch as your cunt unsticks. And– Jesus, Price’s eyes fucking light up, and you realise that he’s clocked your reaction to his honeyed words, the way he calls himself daddy.

The kiss he gives you is claiming and hungry, consuming your lips with a fervour that leaves no room for doubt about his intentions. It’s a taste of both command and reverence — in equal measure. When he pulls away from your mouth you’re breathless, still gasping softly even as he pushes himself down the length of your body.

In the blink of an eye, he’s there — between your welcoming thighs, his hands resting securely on your soft hips, as much a lifeline as a promise of what’s to come. Your pussy is already sloppy, slick and wet in anticipation of him. He shoves his head between your thighs, using his thumbs to spread apart your folds and just look at you.

Your back arches at even the suggestion of his touch, feeling his breath ghost over the heated slick flesh of your cunt. Despite your obvious willingness, and his apparent eagerness, he doesn’t immediately touch you.

You crane your neck to see that he’s staring at your pussy as though the sight of it is earth-shattering. His gaze drinks you in, heated blue eyes taking in the sight of your swollen sticky folds, no doubt throbbing invitingly under his attention. You’ve never seen a man look so hungry, like he’s about to risk anything for it. A dark, groaned "fuck" escapes him as he kneels between your spread legs, head bowed as if in reverence.

"Daddy needs a taste, sweet girl," His deep voice a heavy rumble, vibrating against your soft inner thighs. 

It takes a beat for you to realise that he’s holding himself back, that he’s essentially asking for permission to lay his mouth on you, but then you gasp, “Yes, fuck, yes, please–”

Price takes it as the enthusiastic invitation that it is and bursts into movement immediately, reaching out and guiding your legs wider so that he can muscle in between them properly, before leaning in and finally getting his mouth on you.

You choke, hips aching as you try to spread your legs even further. Price drags the flat of his tongue along the seam of your cunt, groaning as though he’s savouring the taste of you, before wrapping his arms around your thighs to keep you all spread open for him as his tongue rasps over your sensitive flesh.

You want to call out for him, but his name stalls on your tongue. What would you call him – Price? John? Captain? Daddy? You think you would die if you said it out loud.

Then his tongue finds your clit, and your thoughts scatter. He flicks the tip of his tongue over you, back and forth, then flattens it to grind eagerly. You had thought, given the way he had taken that moment just to look at you before he’d pressed his mouth to you, that he would start slow. But instead, he gives you everything he has.

You cry out as he devours your cunt, his bushy eyebrows pulling up in delight as you give him your first moan. While your legs had spread wide in the beginning, eager to let him in, you now close them tight around his head to keep him in place. You have a brief, hazy thought that maybe this is an asshole move of you, a little like if a man were to hold your head down while you were sucking cock, but Price doesn’t seem to mind. If anything, judging by the snarl he lets out when your thighs close around his ears, he likes it.

You toss your head back against the worn couch cushions as jolts of white-hot heat spread from where his mouth is working at you, playing with you, tongue painting long, broad strokes up and down your pussy. 

Your cunt is syrupy hot, throbbing as his tongue rubs relentlessly at your clit. You’re so fucking wet, and you can’t help yourself from rolling your hips more assertively into his mouth. You’re leaking on his mouth, his tongue, your slick drenching his cheeks and his beard.

Seized by a sudden urge to watch, you clumsily raise your head so you can look down. It feels entirely illicit, watching Price’s head between your legs as he buries his face so enthusiastically into your folds. His eyes flash as he glances up, the bottom half of his face hidden entirely in your pussy as his jaw works, the soft hair of his beard tickling your sensitive inner thighs.

With a jolt, you realise that one of his hands has fallen to his lap, his trousers hastily pushed open. He’s fisting at his dripping cock, red and angry and still begging for release against the thick dark hair of his stomach. Sticky pre-cum leaks from his flushed head, pooling into his skin and clothes as his cock bobs and twitches at the sounds of your moans.

The sudden realisation that Price is getting off on this, on the taste of you and the smell of you and the way you’re whining, sets you aflame. He grunts, one of his big hand’s wrapping around his throbbing skin to pump his length to the rhythm of his tongue inside of you.

“Oh, oh fuck,” You press your lips together, stomach pulling tight as his tongue thrusts up inside of you, “Fuck, fuck, fuck that’s so good, oh god, Captain–”

“Yeah,” Price grunts, his words all wetly muffled, his arms wrapped tight around your thighs to keep you in place as he feasts on you, sucking on your clit like it’s a sweet. “I know, baby, I know.”

He’s so accommodating, so nice to you. You tilt your hips up and grind your cunt into his mouth, sighing in satisfaction as his tongue drags along your clit before dipping to lick inside of you. He barely even shifts when you hump your pussy into his face; he only opens his mouth wider, licks at you more enthusiastically as though your desperation is contagious. 

Your belly goes hot and tight, and a high-pitched whimper is torn from your throat. It feels as though you’ve been strung high and taut for months now, and your breath catches at your imminent orgasm. You’ve just been so stressed, and having Price hunched over you on the couch like this with your legs thrown up around his shoulders as he licks and sucks at you so eagerly that it has your eyes rolling in your head feels like it’s curing you.

You think, somewhat madly, that an orgasm like this, with Price’s mouth sealed over your cunt, will solve every damn problem you have right now.

“Wanna come, wanna come, Jesus fucking Christ, please please–” Your chest heaves as you scramble, one of your hands reaching down to cup Price’s head to keep him in place, face buried in your cunt. “Oh god, please make me come–”

Maybe it’s not fair to be so demanding of him, but to his credit Price responds with restless enthusiasm. You double over in pleasure as he heeds your broken little pleas, your nails scraping into the couch as you cling on for dear life. His tongue swirls over your clit quickly and with fervour, tight circles to make your vision go blurry.

You’re lost in the sensation of his hot, wet mouth in your cunt, the way he licks into you like a starving man tasting his first meal. It feels like a sensation overload, as though you’re just completely lost to your own desire, but you just want more of what he is offering. 

You grab his hair again and pull him closer, greedy with need, and he hums in affirmation as he allows you to guide his mouth to exactly where you need it. Arching your hips up, you grind into his mouth, chasing your orgasm. You groan, eyelids fluttering as you wrap your other leg around Price’s shoulders, up around his neck, and his hand snakes around your thigh to anchor you there.

Price’s fingers are gripping at your hips, surely hard enough to leave bruises there. You smile, almost deliriously; you could live with some souvenirs from tonight.

Your feeble gasps start to spiral into whimpers as that hot coil begins to tighten in your belly, and your toes start to curl. When your climax finally hits, it does so with a sense of relief that almost knocks you flat. Your body winds tight then releases, and you convulse in a wave of shudders that has you sobbing out loud.

Your chest heaves as you sob, squirming as Price licks at your clit insistently. It feels like your breath has caught in your chest, your toes curling so hard that your feet cramp. You’re panting like a damn dog as your orgasm rocks through you, until the waves of it subside and you can finally get a full breath again.

From one second to the next your nerves turn red-hot and oversensitive, and you clamp your thighs shut around Price’s ears and whimper-whine pathetically. Mercifully, he gets your unspoken message easily, and finally pulls back, chuckling breathlessly to himself as he pushes your legs apart in order to retreat.

“Fuck,” He says, and his voice comes out as harsh and gravelly as you’ve ever heard it. “Jesus Christ. Knew you’d taste sweet, knew that you’d come so pretty.”

The praise practically slams into you, ripping through you like a forest fire. It feels like you’ve lost your breath all over again, and ridiculously you suddenly feel shy. 

“I–That–” You start to say, but you still feel a little fuzzy-headed from your orgasm and your thoughts fizz away like TV static. 

“Mhm, I know, sweet girl.” He murmurs hoarsely as though you had said something coherent. 

When Price finally sits up, you blink hazily. He had been all hunched over you, crammed into the corner of the couch in order to squeeze himself between your thighs like that, but now that he’s straightening back up again you’re reminded with a tired jolt just how big and broad and strong he is.

A small, self-conscious part of your brain screams at you to close your legs. Your thighs are still spread wide, your cunt on display; you’re still all sloppy and wet, spit-slick and dripping, all puffy from the attention Price had lavished on you with his mouth.

But instead of closing your legs, you let your thighs fall open a little wider and shift restlessly under his intense gaze. Your desire makes you stupid – how could you ever experience anything as mundane as self-consciousness when he’s staring at you like that? He’s looking at you like he wants to fall atop you all over again, and you feel yourself throb – you feel so empty, your body craving something to fill you.

And Price notices the way you keep yourself all spread for him, the way you don’t make any move to cover yourself. Beneath his beard, his face splits into a wide smile, the apples of his cheeks practically glowing with pride.

“Oh, my girl, you're so pretty. Just the loveliest girl in the world with your beautiful face and your hair all wild like that.” He leans in then, and presses a hungry  kiss to your mouth. He tastes salty-sweet, the iron tang of yourself lingering on his lips. His beard is wet too, practically soaked through.

You gasp when he pulls back, overwhelmed by the kiss and the praise and the electric aftershocks of your orgasm. “Your beard is wet.” You observe dumbly.

He chuckles, as though you’ve said something terribly endearing. “Of course it is, sweetheart. That’s all you.”

You mumble a little incoherently, mostly because you’ve just spotted the way his trousers are still unbuttoned and his hard, swollen cock is jutting out from the band of his boxers. It’s angry looking, the head of it so red it looks a little painful, and you feel a sudden urge to return the favour seize you.

But when you reach out, Price is quick to grab your wrist. He transfers his grip to your hand swiftly so you don’t feel as though you’re being held down, his wide palm and thick fingers winding around yours.

“Don’t have to do that, love.” He grunts, shifting. He’s looming over you, hips tilted towards you and his wide shoulders blocking out your view of the office. “D’you think you could take me?”

It takes you a moment for your slow, stupid brain to catch up and process what he’s asking you. Then you nod swiftly, eyes widening. You're wet and sticky and so so empty, and you have no doubt your body is so ready to take him inside. 

You’re still a little limp and drained from the satisfaction of your orgasm, but you keep your thighs spread and wait eagerly for him to touch you again. He doesn’t keep you waiting long; he coos softly at you as he adjusts himself, kissing your tummy then up your sternum and back to your throat. The soft, sweet kisses distract you as he presses his hips between your thighs.

You gasp softly, your clit sensitive enough that when his cock rubs against it, you jolt. Despite the overload of sensation, you find yourself grinding back against him, so desperate for something. As if he can sense what you need, he presses a kiss to your jaw and dips a hand between your thighs. Two thick, calloused fingers circle your clit for a moment and make you whimper, only to dip lower and press inside you.

His fingers are larger than yours, but they still slip into you so damn easily that it’s embarrassing. You barely even feel a stretch, your body so eager for him that your cunt practically sucks his fingers up.

The worst part is the way Price laughs, all soft and breathy as he rubs his callous-roughened fingers into the spongey walls of your cunt. 

“Oh, fuck,” He murmurs, his lips dragging over your overheated skin. “Yeah, you’ll take me just fine.”

You burn with embarrassment, but you still don’t close your legs. It’s silly, but there’s still an element of pride as his fingers rub against the soft inside of your pussy; you want him to see how much you want him, how well you’ll take him. It’s obvious how wet you are, and you hope he’s imagining how good you’ll feel on the inside.

“Need you to turn over for me, love.” He murmurs, gripping at your hips and easing you over so that you’re on your belly beneath him. “That’s it, arse up. My knees aren’t what they used to be. Make it easy for me.”

You usually would make a joke about that, some sort of jab about being old before his time, but you simply don’t have the mental capacity for it. You’re too busy dropping to rest your weight on your elbows as you stick your ass up towards him, arching your back and hoping you look pretty.

He doesn’t waste any more time, much to your relief. Your mouth drops open with a sigh as you feel the blunt head of his cock glide between your slick folds, tapping once against your clit just to watch the way your legs jerk, then finally lining up with your entrance and pressing lightly in. His cock notches, catches, then slides in so slowly that it makes you want to scream.

“Gotta let me in, petal.” He says, using his grip on your hips to pull you back onto his cock in increments. “Relax, relax.”

You had wanted this, you’re more eager than you think you’ve ever been for anyone in your life, and yet Price is a big man and the stretch makes your breath stall in your lungs. Your cunt is sucking his cock in further with a hunger that’s almost embarrassing, even as you wince a little at the feeling of being stretched out to your limits. Though you’re wet and eager and ready, two of Price’s fingers briefly testing inside weren’t quite enough to prepare you for how fat his cock is. 

Your head is spinning. You’ve never taken a cock this big with so little stretching, but neither you nor Price are patient enough to wait. But the stretch feels good, and you find yourself wheezing like a moron as he presses inside inch by inch.

“Fuck… you alright, love?” Price breathes, adjusting his knees on the couch behind you and wrapping his hands around your hips. The motion only succeeds in shifting him far enough away to make you aware of the feeling of him sliding into you again. You both groan, and you feel Price twitch, deep inside you.

“Fuck,” You moan, breath gasping out of you. “You’re fucking huge.”

It feels like you’re learning for the very first time what it really means to be full. For a few seconds, it feels like you can’t even breathe. It feels like his cock is lodged somewhere in your belly, forcing the breath from your lungs as he nestles his way deeper into the eager clutch of your body.

“Am I– s’it too much, honey?” He asks, his voice rough and low as his hands squeeze at the flesh at your hips. “Need me to take it out?”

“No!” You blurt, and your body clenches up hard as though you’re trying to lock him in and keep him from escaping. “Don’t you dare!”

His cock still feels so big, and when you tighten up as hard as you do it almost feels as though he’s fucking impaling you. Price groans as though he’s been shot, and his head lowers so that he’s burying his face into the space between your shoulderblades. His body lowers too until his chest is pressed to your back, joined at the hips as he rocks inside of you. 

“Okay,” He grunts, and you can feel his chest expand as he takes a breath. “Okay, love, but you need to relax. You’re going to squeeze my cock right off.”

“Sorry.” You try to do as he asks, taking a deep breath and allowing your body to go limp and pliant. He grunts in appreciation, and you feel his whiskery beard rasp against your throat as he presses a kiss to your neck as if to reward you.

Your spine is still taut from the pressure of being all stretched out around his cock, and you reach back clumsily to grasp at his belly, the soft fabric of his shirt rucking up between your fingers. Price reaches back and grabs at the neck of his own shirt, tearing it over his head then tossing it aside. Your eyes are all hazy and a little blurred from your overwhelmed tears, but you look back over your shoulder and blink frantically in an attempt to get a proper look at him. 

God, he’s so big and strong, his chest furred with a layer of brown hair curling in whorls over his nipples and down over his belly. You feel yourself pulse in response, your mouth dropping open in a thoughtless gasp of desire. He’s exactly the kind of man you think of when you think of masculinity, and your belly tightens in anticipation when he presses all up against you, heavy and hot.

When he begins to pull out and press back in, the noise you make is utterly pathetic. It feels like he cleaving you in two, carving out a space for his cock every time he fucks back into you. He’s cautious at first, conscious of hurting you, but when your thighs close around his hips he grunts and begins to pick his pace up.

“Christ, you’re tight,” Price says, his voice all rough and muffled against your shoulder. “And you're all mine, love, my own sweet girl, ain’t that right? And daddy's gonna love you so good, isn’t he?”

“Yes,” You gasp stupidly, pressing your face into the couch cushions.

Typically, you find that doggy style can be a position that’s a little detached – usually, you like seeing the face of the person you’re fucking. But right now, with Price plastering his whole hairy body against your back as he ruts into you and the sweet filthy words he’s murmuring to you, this position feels so far from detached that it has your head spinning. It feels like he’s blanketing you, the heat from his skin igniting what feels like an inferno between the two of you. Sweat beads at your forehead, and you moan softly as Price begins to fuck you properly.

You’re bouncing against the couch, clutching at the cushions as your body moves under the weight of Price’s powerful thrusts. The sound of it is sloppy and wet, your bodies smacking together quick and hard. And fuck, it feels good. His cock is hitting that perfect spot deep inside of you, and your entire body jolts with pleasure every time he pounds back in. 

It’s enough to make you squeal, your nails scrabbling desperately for purchase on the threadbare couch cushions in an attempt to stabilise yourself. Your nipples are sensitive from Price’s licking at sucking at them, and your toes curl as your tits are pressed into the rough-textured cushions, electrifying your nerves to the point of almost too-much. 

The noises you make are entirely undignified, and you struggle to muffle them into the couch. Little burbling ah ah ah’s are being torn from your throat every time Price fucks into you, the sensation of his furred balls slapping against you with every thrust has your eyes rolling.

Your body is all loose and pliant from your earlier orgasm, and you whimper as though you’re being fucked absolutely stupid. It’s not that he’s fucking you all that hard, but he’s filling you up so deliciously and knowing that it’s him, your Captain, the man that you’ve worked so damn hard to impress and to please, makes you feel like you’re going to explode. Even through the haze of desire and pleasure, a little part of you is still so aware of making him happy. You keep your back arched, practically waving your ass up in the air as he fucks into you.

“Tell me how you like it, sweetheart. Tell me how it feels.” Price says in a low, rough purr. His chest is still pressed to your back even as the two of you pant and sweat as you rock together. “Tell daddy how good he's making you feel.”

Jesus Christ, Price feels like a fucking furnace against you. It feels almost as though you’ve been glued together, your skin sweat slick as he ruts into you like an animal. Your lungs are burning, and your mind is completely scattered. Getting fucked like this feels feels primal, an exchange of power through pleasure; you’re aware that he’s asked you a question, but you can hardly string two thoughts together. All you can do is squirm and whimper in below him as his weight pins you in place.

“Good,” You groan, vaguely aware that tears are leaking from your eyes and soaking the couch beneath you. Your vision is blurred, and you can’t even see straight. “I just– it’s so much–”

“I know,” He rumbles. “But you can take it, can’t you? You’ve been so good, sweetheart.”

The praise does exactly what he’s hoping for; you practically melt into a puddle beneath him. Your thoughts are slow and sluggish, and your jaw hangs open as you fucking drool. Even still, you manage to nod your head clumsily. You can take him – it feels like a point of pride to prove it now, to show off how good you can be.

Price’s rhythm is practically machine-like, and you make a quiet sound of pure appreciation when his cock slams into that gummy spot inside of you that makes you lose your breath. It’s as though he takes note of it, because from that point on he stays absolutely jackhammering into that little spot, making you see stars and have to bite your lip to stifle your moans. His balls would slam against your clit in a repeated motion that made your underbelly tighten like a coil so close to snapping.

He groans every time he sinks into you, his growls rumbling into your back and ratcheting up the intensity another notch. You feel lost in a sea of sensation, moored only by the places of contact between you and Price. Your hips are humping back against Price’s cock unconsciously, unable to help yourself and unable to get enough of him.

“I wanna come again,” You say, and it comes out in a demanding sort of whine. It’s a little humbling to hear yourself and realise that you sound so honest to god bratty, but you can’t bring yourself to care when Price is apparently in such a giving mood today. 

“You’re gonna come, love.” He promises. His voice has that tone to it, the one you’ve always tried to ignore during work because it makes you so horny. The authoritative one, when it drops just a bit in pitch, when it sounds just a little like a threat.

But despite his promise, he doesn’t change his steady pace. You’re just this side of overwhelmed, but you still need more to push you over the edge into the second orgasm that’s simmering in your lower stomach. 

“Please, daddy,” You let the name pass your lips on a whimper, finally giving in and calling him by the title he’s so clearly craving. He’s fucked all the shame out of your body at this point, leaving you with nothing but white hot desperation. “Please, please make me come again–”

“Fuckin’ Christ–”

Price’s arm reaches around your front, and you’re startled when his big palm wraps around your throat. You think for a moment that you’re about to get choked, but no pressure follows. He just grips you there, gentle and secure, before using his hold on you to pull you back against him so that he’s rutting up into you at a speed that’s overwhelming in the best way. His other arm reaches around your belly so that he can rub at your clit as he rails you into the couch. His soft grip on your throat ensures that no matter how much you try to squirm your way back into meeting his thrusts, you’re forced into stillness. 

It’s exactly what you wanted, and it has you wheezing and hiccuping out moans on every stroke. It’s better than you ever could have hoped for, and you’re nearly sobbing from the sheer sensation of it all. You feel your abdomen drawing tight, heat beginning to build rapidly in the bottom of your belly as he strokes at your clit hard and fast at a pace that matches his fucking.

You know that you’re already starting to shake, trembling from head to toe. You can’t even keep your back arched anymore, though you don’t think Price gives a shit because he just nuzzles at the base of your shoulder as he fucks into you. Between his cock and his fingers, everything just feels too much but your body is strung taut as you proverbially climb higher and higher.

“Oh god, I’m– yes, yes, yes–” You chant, your voice high and reedy and so damn needy.

Then the world falls out from under you. With one last whimpering moan, your body convulses beneath the heavy weight of your captain’s big body. Your vision practically wipes out, and you squeeze down around Price’s dick and pulse. Your whole body rocks with the flood of pleasure, the warm fuzzy feeling that makes you feel as though you’re losing your mind. You know that your hips are twitching madly, simultaneously trying to get more and less as you get overwhelmed by the feeling of him fucking you through it all.

You’re still coming down from the sweet release of your orgasm when Price practically tears himself away from you, leaving you cruelly empty and clenching around nothing. You let out a sharp sound of loss, startled that he’s pulled away so suddenly, and you find yourself slumping bonelessly against the couch now that his hands are no longer supporting you.

The wet shlurping sounds from behind you prompt you to glance lazily over your shoulder from where your face is smushed against the cushions, and you’re blessed with the sight of Price tugging his cock furiously behind you. His cheeks are bright red as he stares at the mess he’s made of you, his jaw soft and his mouth open as he pants.

He sees you looking, and whatever expression is on your face seems to be his undoing. He takes in your tear-clumped eyelashes and your dazed expression, and you can practically see the moment he hurtles over the edge. He practically snarls, his nose scrunching in a way that’s unexpectedly adorable right as his cock gives one fat pump of thick white come, then several smaller sputterings that collect in a creamy puddle right at the base of your spine, just over the swell of your ass.

You sigh, your eyelids fluttering lazily shut as you relish the feeling of his hot come hitting your skin. You still can’t manage to pull yourself together, feeling loose and floaty like you’re on another fucking planet entirely. You’re only distantly aware of his big palm rubbing gentle circles on the small of his back; you think for a second that he’s just trying to soothe you, until your fucked out brain catches up and you realise that he’s rubbing his come into you like it’s goddamn lotion. Your cunt gives a tired throb at the realisation, fluttering as though it’s sad that he didn’t come inside.

“Fuck…” You hear him rumble from behind you, then a hot heavy weight settling over you yet again. This time, he pulls you back into his arms to hold you tight against his chest. 

You go perfectly limp, curling into him and nuzzling into his sweaty hairy chest. Despite yourself, you’re reminded of cuddling with a massive teddy bear. All you can do is hum, basking in the affection and hardly able to think at this point after he’s turned your brain into a slurry of feelings without thoughts.

“You okay, love?” Price asks. You can feel his nose nuzzling against your temple, though you can’t quite summon the energy to open your eyes again. “Did I go too hard on you?”

Your legs are still shaky, your hamstrings aching and your back throbbing a little from the pounding you’ve just taken. But Price is being so lovely and soft, so gentle with you right now. His hands coast over your hips, your back, your waist, squeezing a little bit just because he seems to like the way you feel in his hands.

“Shhh,” You drawl shakily. “Don’t make me think right now.”

A low chuckle, and you feel his broad chest rumble with it where your head is laying atop him. His fingers run up the length of your spine, the touch making you shiver. He touches you like you’re delicate, a stark contrast to the way he’d just fucked you into your sad little office couch. It makes something in your belly squirm.

“Alright. My girl just needed to switch off for a while, hm?” He murmurs, and you can hear the clear undertone of amusement in his voice. “How are you going to finish out work today if you’re all sleepy like this, huh?”

That wakes you up a little, and you finally blink your eyes open again in order to look up at him. An edge of panic is beginning to creep in as awareness comes back to you, and you take a deep breath as your hands curl against his chest.

“Oh my god.” You blurt, eyes growing wide. “I– we’re at work!”

“Sharp as ever, darling.”

Not even Price’s lazy wryness can distract you now. You try to wiggle off the couch, already craning your head around in search of your clothes, but Price’s thick arm locks tight around your middle and keeps you pressed to him.

“We have to– oh my god, we have to get dressed, what if someone walks in–”

“Shh, shhh, I locked the door when I came in,” Price grumbles. He doesn’t appear too impressed with the way you’re attempting to wiggle away, but it doesn’t matter so much; even with one arm he’s perfectly capable of keeping you pinned in place against his chest. “Lie back down, love.”

Slowly, you let yourself relax back into him. It’s hard to hold onto your panic when he’s so obviously unbothered, so you end up hesitantly snuggling back up against his chest as his arms come up to close around you. Despite his encouragement, you’re unsure whether or not you’re allowed to be touching him like this. But his hands don’t stray from you, not even once, and gradually you return to your previous state of being a puddle of limbs and pliant muscle.

“That’s it, relax.” He coaxes, clearly pleased now that you’re melting back into him. 

“I have so much work to catch up on.” You grumble, though you have no intention of actually going anywhere now that he’s given you the greenlight to stay like this.

His chest vibrates beneath your cheek, and you realise he’s chuckling again. It feels good, and you sigh softly as your fingers stroke lightly over the defined shape of his soft pecs.

“You think I wasn’t capable of keeping the ship afloat for the couple of days you were gone?” He asks, one hand stroking over your flank then dipping lower to flatten his palm over your left asscheek. “I finished out those little files you were stressin’ over. No picture of Ghost for his, but like I said, that’s standard.”

You had known that he had finished updating the files for you when you had seen Farah’s, but hearing it straight from his mouth is something else entirely. You purse your lips and lower your eyes, still embarrassed about your little freak out despite his apologies. 

“Thank you.” You mumble. 

You try to hide your face in his chest again, but a large hand on your jaw stops you by tilting your head back and forcing you to look at him. A thumb strokes over your cheek, and then he’s leaning in and pressing a sweet kiss to your mouth. You respond tiredly but eagerly, still hardly able to believe that your boss that you’ve been mooning after for months is being so affectionate and intimate with you.

Price pulls back slightly so that your lips are just barely touching, breathing each other’s air for a moment.

“Ask for help when you need it, sweetheart.” He murmurs, his lips dragging over yours. “That’s what I’m here for. We help each other with the workload, alright?”

“Yeah,” You breathe, leaning in eagerly in the hopes of getting another kiss. “Alright.”

Price smiles, his cheeks going all full and round as his eyes crinkle, and you feel your heart throb so violently it feels as though it jumps right up into your throat. He leans in and kisses you again, soft and sweet as his beard rasps against your chin.

You want to stay like this forever, wrapped up so warm and cosy and safe in his arms. He makes you feel so safe, like you’re valued and appreciated, and you can’t even feel bad about being lazy because he so clearly doesn’t want to move either.

“Let me come home with you tonight,” He says suddenly, and you feel his bicep contract as he squeezes you closer. “You have an apartment off base, don’t you? I’ll… why don’t I cook you dinner, hm? Want to show you how much I appreciate all the work you do.”

There’s a pause, then he adds cautiously, “If I’m not being presumptuous, that is.”

You can’t stop the shy smile from overtaking your face. He’s so sweet, and being on the receiving end of this kind of attention from him is more than you ever could have expected. Ridiculously, he seems a little nervous as well, and you come to the slow realisation that he had been vulnerable with you as well when it came to his interests when he had fucked you.

“I thought this was you appreciating the work I do.” You say coyly, glancing pointedly at all of your bare skin pressed up against his.

“Mm. You do a lot of work, and I’m very appreciative.” Price murmurs, squeezing teasingly at your ass.

You giggle despite yourself, relishing the light-hearted air between the two of you. At the sound of your laugh, Price’s expression brightens further; it’s strange, seeing your usually stern, stressed captain being so sweet with you. You’re so used to seeing him with that flinty determined look in his eyes, or barking orders, or with his eyes sagging with exhaustion after a long deployment only to return to a pile of mission reports. Seeing him like this, with those soft eyes and a fond smile, makes your heart feel as though it’s beating out of rhythm.

“I said I’d look after you, sweetheart.” He murmurs, and this time his voice is missing that teasing undertone from before. He sounds so earnest now, almost painfully so. “You just need to let me.”

Yeah, you think to yourself as you let yourself succumb to the drowsy haze that’s been tugging at you, allowing your eyes to slide shut as you nuzzle into Price’s bare chest. You think letting John Price look after you might just be the easiest thing you’ve ever done.