Scared to Death (Chris Evans x Pregnant!Reader)
A/N: I wrote this as a second installment to go along with Surprise. I'll link it down below if you want to check it out, but FYI this one can be read as a stand alone as well! Also if you know what scene from what show I was inspired by for this one, you're freaking awesome. x
Summary: Something goes wrong while you're in labor with twins.
Pairing(s): Chris Evans x Pregnant!Reader/ Wife!Reader
Warning(s): Some language, some medical stuff, mention of blood, and childbirth complications.
“This. Sucks.” You groaned and leaned back into your pillow.
The last contraction had just subsided and it was the worst one yet.
Even with the epidural you’d had earlier, the pain was still excruciating.
“We’re almost there,” Chris offered you a weak, tired smile.
“Oh, shut up,” You glared at him. “There is no we in this, just me. And I am not even remotely close to having these babies, Chris. I’ve been lying in this bed in labor for almost thirteen hours and I'm only at like five centimeters. How? How is it possible that I’m only halfway there?” You groaned again, feeling hot tears of frustration prickling at your eyes. You quickly wiped them away with the back of your hand. You hadn’t exactly been the easiest, nor the most pleasant person to deal with over the last several hours, and Chris had been nothing but patient, supporting and loving towards you. You’d snapped at him, cursed at him, and there might have been a point in time where you had flung your pillow at his head during a particularly painful contraction before you had been given any drugs. "I’m sorry, I know I’m being insufferable right now, Chris. But I hate this. I just hate this so much.”
Chris reached out and gently stroked your hair. “I know, honey. I know it hurts and I know you’re tired. It’s been a really long night.” He trailed his thumb softly down your cheek. “There’s no need to apologize to me.”
Although he wasn’t the one in labor, he looked just as exhausted.
You hadn’t slept a wink in the last thirteen hours and neither had he.
An assigned nurse had brought in a cot for him to sleep on, but Chris, being the stubborn man that he was, refused to sleep if you couldn’t.
“Things are moving really slow, Chris,” You told him after a moment. “I really don’t think anything’s going to be happening anytime soon. You need to rest.” You gestured to the cot. “It’s almost three in the morning, you should get some sleep. I’ll be okay on my own for a while.”
“I’m fine. Besides, I think coffee number three is kicking in now," Chris joked, nodding towards the growing pile of empty Starbucks cups on the bedside table. “I’m fine, really. I don’t want to miss a single thing.”
You didn’t have the energy to argue with him, so you simply let it go.
Letting out a small sigh, you stared up at the ceiling of your room.
The few moments you weren’t in pain, your mind was busy racing.
Part of you wanted these babies out already. But another part didn’t.
You’d read all the baby books. You’d nested and set up the nursery.
Chris’ successful acting career made it so you’d all be financially secure.
You had everything that you could possibly need.
And yet, you felt so incredibly unprepared for what was to come.
“What is it?” Chris had noticed the pensive look on your face.
“I’m scared,” You murmured quietly, eyes still fixed on the ceiling.
He reached out for your hand. “I know you’re scared, but remember what the nurse said earlier, your body knows exactly what to do—”
“No, not that,” You interrupted him. You turned, bringing your gaze to meet his and frowned. “Don’t get me wrong, this is terrible. But giving birth isn’t what scares me, Chris.”
“Then what does scare you?”
“The fact that this isn’t even going to be the hardest part of it all,” You laughed in spite of yourself. “We’re about to be parents.”
Chris chuckled, lightly. “That just now dawned on you?”
“I guess it hadn’t really sunk in until now,” You admitted, sheepishly. “I know it sounds ridiculous, I’ve been pregnant for nine months and I’m just now starting to realize that we are going to be responsible for not just one, but two lives. We’re going to have these two little babies and we have to raise them and take care of them, and it terrifies me. What if I screw up? What if I make the wrong decisions as a mother?" There were so many anxieties beginning to surface and you couldn't believe that they decided to wait until the last possible minute to appear. “It’s scary as hell to think that one bad decision on your end could fuck up your kid’s entire life.”
“Honey, you know I’m usually the worrywart out of the two of us and even I think that you’re overthinking it a little bit.”
“Maybe you’re underthinking it,” You retorted. “That's a possibility.”
Chris tilted his head to the side, fighting back an amused smile.
He held his hands up in defense. “I know it's not, I’m sorry.” He quickly apologized, but you could tell that he was still biting back a bit of laughter. “I have had moments where I feel overwhelmed too, baby. I’ve had a lot of those moments, actually. We might not be the perfect parents, hell I don’t think those even exist. But what I do know is that we’ll be good parents.” He placed a hand on your stomach. “These little ones are so loved already and they’re not even here yet. We have done everything that we can to prepare for them, and we’ve taken the classes, read all of the books. And whatever we don’t know, we’ll figure it out together, somehow. We’re going to be just fine, trust me.”
“You really think so?” You chewed nervously on your lower lip.
“I know so,” Chris assured you with confidence. “I know it’s hard, and I know that you’re scared. But I want you to set aside your fears for just a minute and think about all of the exciting things to come. Getting to see who the twins will look like, getting to know their personalities. Moments like hearing their first words and watching them take their first steps.”
Maybe you doubted yourself as a mother, but there was no reason for you to doubt that Chris was going to be an amazing father.
“You’re right,” You said quietly after a while.
“I have that annoying habit some times.” He winked. “Still scared?”
“Ask me that again when the twins are here.”
“Noted.” Chris sat back in his chair and yawned. “And just as quickly as it kicked in, coffee number three is already wearing off. I’m going downstairs to grab another. Think you’ll be okay on your own for five minutes?”
“Yeah, I’ll be—oh!” You sat up slightly, bracing yourself. “Contraction.”
Forgetting all about the coffee, Chris stood up, grabbed your hand and looked up at the monitor. He gave it a reassuring squeeze. “Okay, here we go. Remember, you have to do your breathing, alright?”
You felt a sudden, sharp pain shoot throughout your body.
It was agonizingly different and unlike all the others that you’ve had.
At first, you had thought it was just the one abnormality. But then it was followed by another. And another. Something was wrong.
You let out something mixed in between a scream and a sob.
Chris looked at you, alarmed. He’d watched you go through labor for the last several hours and he had not heard anything like that come out of your mouth up until now. “What? What is it?”
“This isn't a contraction!” You cried, shaking your head. “Chris, this isn’t a contraction!”
“What do you mean? What’s wrong?” He tried to remain calm for your sake, but his heart had started racing inside of his chest.
“It’s in my back! The pain is in my back!" You sobbed, another wave of searing pain coming on and causing you to cry out. The monitor above your bed started to go off loudly as your vital signs began to change dramatically, some of them skyrocketing, and others plummeting. Then, as if that wasn’t terrifying enough, the machine that monitored the babies’ heart rates began to sound off too, the numbers flashing a dangerous red. A nurse who had heard the alarms nearby rushed into the room and you looked at her with wide, fearful eyes. "Help me, please! Something is wrong!"
“What’s happening to my wife?” Chris demanded, a trembling edge to his voice. He was still trying to remain calm, but between your crying and the monitor alarms going off, he was now struggling to hide his own panic.
Ignoring him, the nurse yanked your blankets back from your legs and she gasped.
Chris’ blue eyes darkened as they filled with terror, his hand covering his mouth in shock.
“What—what is it?” You sat up a little more and glanced down to see a pool of bright red blood between your legs, staining your hospital gown as well as the hospital bedsheets. “Is that b-blood? Why is there so much blood?! What’s happening to me?!”
The nurse rushed to the door, poking her head out into the hallway. She shouted for a doctor, and fortunately, your obstetrician had been nearby and was in your room in an instant. She rushed over to your side and checked all of the monitors before murmuring something to the nurse, who then paged for assistance. Two more nurses came hurrying in, and was all just utter chaos. “Alright,” The doctor said, urgently but calmly. “Let’s go. We need to get her upstairs to the operating room, let’s move it.”
“Operating room?” Chris repeated, his throat going dry. “What do you mean? What’s wrong with her?”
“Sir, please, we need you to step back out of the way.” A nurse pulled him away from you as everyone else worked to prepare to wheel out your bed. Within seconds, you were unhooked from all of the machines and the nurses were wheeling you out of the maternity ward and up towards the operating room.
Chris followed behind, his emotions going from worried, to scared, to angry because no one was telling him a damn thing. “Doctor, can you please tell me what the fuck is happening to my wife?! What is happening?!” He looked at you, noticing that you had gone pale, sweat dripping down your face and neck. You had also suddenly gone quiet, your eyes hardly able to remain open as if you were seconds away from losing consciousness. “Please! I need someone to tell me what the fuck is happening to her!”
“Mr. Evans, your twins are in distress. They’re not getting enough oxygen and we need to get her into emergency surgery now to deliver.” She spoke without even looking at him, she was too busy focused on you. “It can be life threatening to both your wife and the babies if we don't deliver them as soon as possible.”
Chris felt his blood go cold in his veins. Life threatening? “What?!”
As soon as they reached the operating room, the doors swung open.
“Come on, let’s go,” The doctor urged the nurses. “Room three. Scrub up and get her prepped. Let the NICU know we’ll need some help up here with the babies.”
One of the nurses looked at Chris, who had every intention of going into that room with you. “You’ll have to wait out here, sir.”
“What? No! I need to be with her!”
He tried stepping around her, and the nurse held an arm out to stop him despite being a foot shorter than him.
“Sir, I cannot allow you in the operating room, it is a sterile environment. I’m sorry, but you have wait out here.”
“Chris?” Somehow, through your daze, you managed to say his name, your eyelids feeling heavier and heavier with each passing second. “Chris?”
“It’s going to be okay!” Chris managed to choke out behind you. “I’m right here! I’ll be right here! Everything’s going to be okay!” He wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince you or himself of it.
“There is a waiting room around the corner to the left.” The nurse who had stopped him from entering the room with you looked at him with an empathetic expression on her face. “I understand you are worried, but we will do everything we can for your wife and babies. The doctor will come out and speak with you as soon as she can, okay?”
Unable to speak, Chris gave a weak nod of his head and she followed behind your bed as they continued to wheel you away. He could only watch helplessly as you disappeared behind a corner and the double doors of the operating room swung closed.
The next two hours that passed felt like an eternity.
Chris paced the waiting room, unable to sit still. He didn’t care about the stares coming his way, nor did he care about the classless asshole who decided to sneak a picture of him with his phone.
Not knowing what was happening to you or the babies, it was hell. It was agonizing and there was absolutely nothing that he could do about it.
By hour number three, Chris had finally dropped down into a chair, his body feeling worn out.
He hunched forward, dropping his head in his hands. He was scared to death.
In his entire life, he’d never known a feeling like this before.
He didn’t know what he was going to do if anything happened to you or to the babies.
“Mr. Evans?” The doctor called as she emerged from the operating room.
Chris jumped to his feet, rushing over to her. “Doctor! How is she?”
“Your wife is out of surgery and in recovery. She’s a little groggy, but it all went well and she’s going to be just fine.”
“And the babies?” He prompted anxiously. “Are they okay?”
“The twins are still being tended to, but they are okay,” she confirmed.
Chris let out a shaky sigh of relief. “When can I see my wife?”
“I can take you to her room now. Follow me this way.”
He followed her to the recovery ward where you had been placed in a private room. He stopped short and nearly fell to his knees as soon as he saw you lying there, but managed to collect himself. “Hey you,” he said softly, coming up to the side of your bed. He sat in the chair that had been placed next to it and gently touched the back of your hand, his fingertips lightly brushing against your cool skin. The doctor explained that it had been an invasive surgery, and as much as Chris wanted to just take you in his arms, he had to be delicate. “I hope you know that you scared the living hell out of me for a minute there.”
You were still slightly out of it, but managed to shoot him a small, tired smile. “Sorry.” You were just coming out of the anesthesia, and everything before they’d put you under was a little fuzzy, but it was all slowly starting to come back to you, piece by piece. “You know me, I just have to make things extra dramatic. Can’t ever make anything easy.”
Chris laughed, despite the tears welling in his eyes.
“Have you seen them, yet?” You asked him, softly.
“No.” He sniffed, shaking his head. “Not yet.”
As if on cue, two nurses entered your room, each of them wheeling in a bassinet. There was a tightly wrapped little bundle in each one.
Chris automatically rose to his feet, his heart fluttering wildly in his chest.
“Congratulations,” One of the nurses beamed, bringing the bassinets up beside your bed. “A healthy baby boy—and a healthy baby girl. We will be back for them in a couple of hours to run some more standard tests. If you need anything, please call us.” They excused themselves, leaving the room so you and Chris could have some private time with the twins.
You watched as Chris slowly walked over to them, an emotional lump rising in your throat.
“Hey there,” he cooed to them. “Hey guys.”
The feeling that he had seeing their two little faces was inexplicable.
It took Chris a moment, but he then realized it was a feeling similar to the one that he had felt when he had first fallen in love with you.
“I’m your daddy," he told them through a tearful smile. “Hi guys.”
“Hey, I want to see them too,” You whined. “Come help me up.”
“Honey, you just had surgery—”
“Chris, please don't make me beg you. Because I will. Shamelessly.”
Chris shot you a reluctant look. He couldn’t say no to you.
“Okay, but we have to be really careful. Come here.” He slid an arm around your back and gingerly helped you into a sitting position so that you could have a better view of the twins. He noticed how you were biting your lip as you craned your neck and tried to get a better look them and instantly knew what you were thinking. Chris walked over to the bassinets again and carefully lifted his son from one of them. It was almost surreal, watching him hold his child for the first time. The look of pure adoration on his face as he smiled down at the baby was almost too much for your heart handle. “Here. Hold out your arms.” Chris delicately helped you take the baby into your arms. “You got him?”
You nodded, feeling a tear slip down the side of your face. “I got him.”
“Can't forget about this little angel.” He picked up his daughter, who looked identical to her brother—the only thing that helped you two tell them apart were the standard hospital blankets that they were wrapped in, one pink and one blue. Holding her, Chris managed to squeeze next to you, perching himself on your bed. He made sure that you weren’t in any discomfort before finally relaxing with his baby girl in his arms.
“I can’t believe this,” You whispered, looking from one tiny face to the other. “I can't believe they’re actually ours. They’re so perfect.”
“Must take after you,” Chris grinned, turning to you. He noticed how it just felt so natural to see you sitting there holding your newborn. You, the same woman who was expressing how scared she was becoming a mother earlier during labor, the same woman who had just been through a life threatening birth complication, looked so incredibly calm and relaxed. It might have been your maternal instincts that were kicking in, but you didn’t seem worried about anything at all. “Are you still scared?”
“Nope,” You replied, grazing your son's soft cheek with your finger as you grinned back at Chris. “I’m not scared anymore. Now that they’re here in our arms, everything feels right and the fear is just gone. I’m ready for this, Chris. I’m ready for this chapter of my life with you and our children.”
“That's my girl,” he whispered proudly, leaning towards you. "I love you."
You leaned in too, giving him a kiss. “I love you too.”
