BeYOUtiful @k-queen-bitch - Tumblr Blog

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Addiction

I am 19 months clean but people keep asking me about my story. What addiction was like for me. Now I’m not going to write my whole story down but let me just talk to you about one specific time. After 5 years of struggling with heroin I finally decided enough was enough and went to rehab. Did a 2 month stay and during that time I met an amazing guy. I got out about a week before but I picked him up when he got out. This started our love. For starters our first date was a dinner cruise and he was such a gentleman he made me feel like a queen and made all the chaos disappear for a little while. Until he relapsed. I loved him though and wasn’t going to let that stop me. As much as I hate to admit it I do love chaos but don’t we all. Well he was high as a kite one night and looked at me and asked me to fuck all night but I was jealous of how amazing he felt so I asked him to get me as high as he was first. I promised him it was only going to be one time (but that is what I always say). He eventually agreed but only if I would smoke it with him. So I also agreed as long as I could do a fat shot first. Well I did and he inhaled that dope and exhaled it into my mouth. The look he gave me was enticing and I instantly became addicted. Addicted to the dope but also addicted to him. We were completely in love and completely addicted to heroin again. We destroyed each other but couldn’t get enough of one another. Until one night we got way too high and he got angry… He opened the car door and took me by my arms and threw me into the car. My friend hopped into the backseat because he had to be dropped off. Me and my boyfriend were screaming the whole way to my best friends house and when we pulled into her driveway I was in tears. He broke my fucking heart and didn’t even care. I told him I hated him even more because I was in love with him… that comment started a fist fight. I had finally enough and pulled my knife on him. My friend ran inside to grab my best friend. She luckily pulled me away from my boyfriend. I smoked a butt shot about a gram of dope and finally calmed down. My boyfriend came over kissed me and said he would always love me. (By the way most of the story my friend had to tell me about because I don’t remember anything after he threw me into the car). Me and my best friend finally fell asleep I woke up the next morning wicked confused but she already had the rig set up for me to do a shot. I did the shot and checked my phone 10 missed calls and 33 text messages all from my boyfriend. I saved all of his texts and voicemails because those are the last ones I ever received from him. He overdosed and died that morning. My heart was broken and it took me a while to finally get clean again but he was and always will be my true love.

yoursummerdreamz

You know I'm a single mom and I'm not ready to be tied down and my ex gf understands that but all these guys just don't get it. Me and my ex girl sleep together all the time and I can't seem to find a guy who excepts that I also have a girl because I'm not ready for anything serious in my life or my daughters right now