kat

So we meet again. Good to see you.

[worshipgifs]

[beneath-this-skin-deactivated20]

[kaht]

We only see the good happening in the majority of social media life. On our platforms is the ideals of life we live everyday or hope for. Nobody sees the true bleeding colors of grey that spill between the keyboard and our fingertips. For who do we post and for what? For memories that could be deleted in a moment or shut off forever?

To hold on and cherish memories is nothing more than a photo or a quick story nowadays. Often, it feels as if they merge together and it gets harder everyday to differentiate what was special or what was on our posts.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

10 Traits of Mentally Strong People

1. They are able to stay calm, and maintain self-control.

2. They have clear boundaries between themselves and other people.

3. They respect their own and others’ boundaries.

4. They don’t become defensive, or feel completely crushed, when someone is critical of them or their work.

5. Where appropriate … they are able to take their fair share of the blame, and are quick to apologize when they are in the wrong.

6. They are flexible, and willing to adapt or change.

7. They know their limitations, and are happy to be helped.

8. They forgive themselves willingly – and then move on with life.

9. They don’t bear grudges, or play games with people’s feelings.

10. They are responsible, persistent, and are people of their word.

[sunrisewallpapers]

Tropical

•please like or reblog if you use

[kaht]

I‘ll grey out past the windows panes as they pass me by. Some things never change, sometimes we wonder why. I suppose it will never escape. I suppose it will always stay.

[kaht]

There are many familiar soundtracks that play endlessly in my mind.

[kaht]

Sometimes you never really realize how damaged you are until someone comes in to gently love your scars. For years I have kept my armor thick, and as they break down bit by bit, I realize there are wounds that were never healed and only tucked away. More recently, I realize how damaged I am. How I have perceived things the past few years has made me realize how far my understanding of being loved has become. It is quite intriguing and also saddening at the same time. Of course my idea of love is that the same amount I give I would ideally like to receive back. This is not always possible nor realistic in most cases. But...the realization that it takes someone to begin to love me well and shake my insides, I find myself in the land of inbetween once again in this season. A land I seem to often find myself in more and more these days.

[kaht]

I seem to miss love. As in, it often feels as though I miss love’s timing. I am tossed back and forth but never with a true north pointing to where I should be going. And although I am content, deep down my desires to love cease to end. To have gained everything in satisfaction, and still crave to a deeper understanding of it all.

[kaht]

Knowing about God is one thing, but knowing Him is another. People want to seek God and everything good about Him, but don’t want the commitment that comes with the relationship. To open yourself up and be vulnerable with something you may not always be able to see or touch can be frightening, yes. However, I believe it is more than that. He created you, He knows you, and He loves you. He is tangible and real. Jesus is living. God has never moved and is constantly pursuing us. You see, people want Him but not everything else that comes with it, yet God is bigger than your opinions, perspectives, and agendas. When we focus on the problems, on death, or on the realities that nobody needs to be reminded of, we forget the hope that we have in the world. Joy, laughter, love, and peace--when we direct our gaze to such things, we will begin to see a small spec of what He can do in our lives.

[kaht]

You are a strange character in my life. You don’t fit the plot. You don’t fit the lines. You were once there and now you are here in front of me. You neither fit the story nor is it any better without you. You are something I cannot put my finger on. It does not bother me, but at the same time i makes me curious. Yet deep in my soul I know it is nothing I can think on if I tried. Nothing I desire even if I wished. I am but devoted to my own skin. I love myself enough to not make another mistake of putting these walls down and giving myself away so quickly. My heart is given to something nobody could ever satisfy.

[kaht]

I have learned to constantly love and I search for love, but I never need or desire it as much. I love for the sake of loving. It fulfills my spirit and my soul, and although I may crave it, it is not anything that I desire as of now. I have wasted years giving love to people and have had my heart crushed by those who still have yet to know. Yet I grow stronger from those days of heartbreak. 

I still love and crave it so often, but the fulfillment for me comes in giving it and seeking it to know and understand.

[kaht]

My head is constantly spinning with abstract thoughts and ideas, always searching for something with a deeper meaning. I am a walking contradiction. I never question as much why I am the way I am, but I realize that there are probably not many like me. I find myself earnestly wanting to help others yet people are the very thing that tire me. My sense of purpose revolves around finding meaning through helping others find their purpose, yet all the while it drains me. 

I am constantly being pulled left and right, up and down, side to side, by thousands of waves of emotions and thoughts. It never ceases to fail that I find myself lying in bed at the end of the day completely exhausted and ready to shut off the world, only to start it up once more the next day. Yet, I am ever so passionate about the journey and drive, genuinely, as much as it kills me. I don’t know how to explain it, but I have always felt myself functioning two different ways simultaneously and effortlessly, but nobody seems to ever understand. 

[kaht]

Life is not guaranteed. No matter one day if we are healed, we are still in the grip of death. If we maintain balance in our own lives, there is someone else who has not, and that could be it--in an instant. Sudden tragedies are nothing to celebrate, yet only to grieve. They are reminders of how short life can be no matter who you are or how successful you are becoming. Your life is not guaranteed. I think this is something that has not been forgotten, but is constantly being drowned out by social media and noise around us. We get so caught up in our own social bubbles and forget the reality around us. As if nothing really feels real or that it is happening. We have lost the art of being able to feel what that is. On to the next. On to the next. But your life is not guaranteed. Even if one day you breathe, the next you may not. Would we all remember to live life richly and cherish it abundantly.

[kaht]

Words will never describe the compassion and heartbreak I feel when I see someone in pain or reaching for things to forget the pain. To see someone in a state of mind that is unnatural and wandering off, my heart breaks. My heart breaks so much.

[kaht]

coffee delights

You are a smooth cup of coffee Perfectly dialed in to my smile Your eyes catch me off guard And I am lost in the pour of your charm You see I normally don’t drink coffee yet With every sip of you I let you peek into my soul just for a while And the caffeine kicks in It’s almost as if you are just the perfect cup But I don’t like to try new things I’ve always much preferred tea But a taste of you Is all I need To know you brighten my day

[kaht]

It took me a very long time to admit what I wanted from what I needed.