Kaori and Yoshi

[abz-j-harding]

Preview pages of Parliament of Rooks #1 Spring

Read it here

[canongecko]

Headcanon: Werewolf with crazy hair? Enid is Remus and Tonks daughter.

[minomoimoi]

Someone on TikTok (can't remember who) said that Enid Sinclair is the lovechild of tonks and Remus lupin and I can't unsee it

[kaoriandyoshi1]

Now it’s my headcanon.

[delphinidin4]

i’m p sure i’ve posted this before, but it’s still funny

[alrtist]

@7eselt

[jewishdragon]

The moses one is innacurate. Moses would cast divine intervention and it would just work every time and have a different outcome.

[gayvampyr]

[kaoriandyoshi1]

Yeah, I see where you’re coming from. But…book-form instead of movie.

Which apparently exists.

[protoninspector]

how do you see someone's follower count, how do you know if you should feel better or worse than them?

[protoninspector]

tumblr people clearly not a fan of jokes criticising twitter i guess

[protoninspector]

My bad

[ecrivainsolitaire]

[valtsv]

it would be fun if an angel and a vampire were friends i think

[valtsv]

vampire: ugh, you mortals simply can't comprehend the timescale i live on. i've watched your empires rise and fall, your cities crumble to dust. i find your short little lives amusing at best. i -

angel: HI, I HAVE BEEN ALIVE SINCE THE DAWN OF TIME AND I NOTICED YOU ARE ALSO SOMEWHAT OLD?

vampire: ...sure. hey what was the dawn of time like?

angel: PRETTY BORING ACTUALLY. NOTHING ELSE EXISTED YET.

vampire: oh, man, i feel you. i slept through, like, the entire 14th century it was so boring. everyone was dying of plague and shit anyway so i didn't miss much.

[valtsv]

vampire: hey i am outside your apartment

angel: YOU'VE JUST BEEN STANDING THERE? FOR HOW LONG?

vampire: uhhhhhhh a mere speck in comparison to our immortal lives so don't worry about it honestly. i need you to invite me in though.

angel: OF COURSE, I'M SO SORRY. PLEASE COME IN.

vampire: *steps over the threshold and immediately starts hissing and coughing like a cat with a bad hairball*

angel: OH, I'M SO SORRY. MY APARTMENT IS CONSIDERED HOLY GROUND BECAUSE I LIVE IN IT. I SHOULD HAVE WARNED YOU.

vampire: *coughing* it's fine. do you - *cough* *wheeze* what are your thoughts on chinese? i know a great place just a couple of blocks from here

[valtsv]

everyone replying to this with "and they were lovers"? target audience

[anotherpapercut]

apparently my boss who is a professor at my school doesn’t have a cell phone and his coworkers were upset by this so they bought him a childs toy phone and labeled it “David’s jitterbug” (for those of you that don’t know jitterbugs are phones made for old people that have like massive buttons and shit) so the other day I walked into his office to ask him a question and he pressed a button on it which made it start loudly playing the ABCs and he said “excuse me I have to take this” and then started singing along to the ABCs while shooing me out of his office

[anotherpapercut]

this is the phone. he apparently was in the middle of a meeting with the department the other day and got annoyed so he pressed a button, said “I have to take this” and left

[teaboot]

every time this post comes across my dash I am overcome by the sheer power

[fierceawakening]

I am not surprised I’m sore after pt the other day

I’m just surprised that is a spot one can be sore in

Wtf muscle are you?

[kaoriandyoshi1]

I’ve never had physical therapy but for some reason I feel this in my soul.

[moondrunklesbian-deactivated202]

You know the problem with reading a book? You get hooked and then it ends and you feel sad

[moondrunklesbian-deactivated202]

This post is cancelled, I have found a new book and everything is all right again

[moondrunklesbian-deactivated202]

By Talos this cannot be happening

[unbfacts]

[tugboatcaptain]

[kaoriandyoshi1]

@jashasedai our next project???

[improbablecarny]

the manufactured animosity on this site between bi women and lesbians over bi women “making lesbians care about het relationships” is so dumb. my lesbian friends have made a sport out of finding weird little men to show me and asking me my opinion on them. i would give them my life

[improbablecarny]

all the tags on this post that are like “omg i love showing my bi friend weird guys” and “omg my lesbian friend also shows me weird guys!” are like legitimately so heartwarming i love you lesbians i love you bi women i love all of our weird little discord convos

[0hheytherebigbadwolf]

Arthur, texting: Please bring home PURIFIED water with NO minerals added for taste.

Merlin, at the store: We got spring water.

Arthur: NO.

Gwen: With EXTRA minerals.

Merlin: It's like licking a stalagmite.

Arthur: DON'T COME HOME.

Gwen: Mmmmm cave water.

[madebypointlesswords]

Arthur: If Gwen and I were both drowning, who would you save?

Merlin: I don't know, both of you?

Arthur: No, if you could only save one of us

Merlin: Well, I would probably save Gwen because she can't swim that well and I happen to know you're an excellent swimmer

Arthur: Suppose I was holding an anchor? Who would you save then?

Merlin: Well, why don't you let go of the anchor?

Arthur: It's a family heirloom

Merlin: I'm leaving

[0hheytherebigbadwolf]

Morgana: You lying, cheating bastard!

Arthur: Well, you're the spoilt little princess who thinks she can do whatever she wants! Welcome to the real world, bitch!

Morgana: I WILL PUT YOUR HEAD ON A PIKE AND LET CROWS EAT YOUR EYES!

Uther, picking up the Monopoly board: Okay, I think that's enough family game night.

[0hheytherebigbadwolf]

Merlin: I told Arthur his ears flush when he lies.

Gwen: Why?

Merlin: Look.

Merlin: Hey Arthur! Do you love us?

Arthur, covering his ears: No.

Gwen: