Delphinidin

Our lives shall not be sweated from birth until life closes; Hearts starve as well as bodies; Give us bread but give us roses.

[kissycat]

Thank god soulmates (one person destined for you that you will never be happy without) aren't real but soulmates (people you understand and connect with on a special level, multiple, some of which you havent met yet) are real

[important-animal-images]

[fullyfunctionalminiaturebeehive]

@kleefkruid your tag is golden.

[delphinidin4]

I know most adults have occasional dreams about being back in school. But I have a variation on it that I feel like a lot of people don't have: I'm back in school, but I KNOW that I graduated. I KNOW that I have a doctorate and I'm 40 years old. And yet I realized I somehow fell back into going to high school?? I think it's because I went back to subbing at my home high school after grad school.

Does anybody else have this variation?

[movie-gifs]

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST (1991)

[firawren]

Meanwhile, Gaston is also angrily moping in front of a fireplace about how it's hopeless to win Belle's affections, with friends trying to cheer him up.

But in Gaston's case, he is blaming Belle for it, and his friends don't tell him to do better. They tell him he's perfect just how he is, which ends up making him worse, and leads to his tragic demise.

Beast, however, is blaming himself, specifically his appearance, and Beast's servants tell him to improve himself. He doesn't do it right away, but ultimately he becomes better. Only then does Belle fall in love with him, which leads to his happy ending.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[all-peristeronic]

You know what’s a scene from Persuasion that we should talk about the way we talk about the “Wentworth pries a clinging child off Anne’s back” scene? A “this man is grade-A husband material” scene?

It’s the way Wentworth talks to Mrs. Musgrove about her dead son. He knows better than anyone that Dick Musgrove was a useless good-for-nothing, that it was a piece of “good fortune” for his family “to lose him before he reached his twentieth year.” His first reaction to Mrs. Musgrove talking about “poor Richard” to him is to laugh inwardly–but. Instead of laughing at her, he goes over and sits next to Mrs. Musgrove and speaks to her so kindly and patiently–“with so much sympathy and natural grace, as shewed the kindest consideration for all that was real and unabsurd in the parent’s feelings.”

Austen goes on for two paragraphs about how ridiculous Mrs. Musgrove looks while lamenting over her idiot son, and the entire time, Wentworth is keeping a completely straight face, focusing only on the fact that this woman is sincerely upset and he can relieve her feelings a little by showing compassion.

What could possibly be sexier than this rich, dashing, battle-hardened sea captain taking a moment to show genuine kindness, generosity, and compassion? When he could instead be flirting with two pretty, single women, or talking to anyone else in the room? What husband material. And Anne is right there, listening to this.

[all-peristeronic]

Jane Austen, in every novel: Does he care about people? Does he use his privilege for good? Does he have a sense of duty and does he act on it? If not, throw him in the trash.

[delphinidin4]

Garbage men go in the anachronistic trash can.

[delphinidin4]

source

[fraterrisus]

@copperbadge say hi to your cats for me

[copperbadge]

AW YAY! Hope you had fun in my neighborhood!

Fun fact, I can tell from the angle of the photo that you were standing in front of the restaurant that has been the focus of ongoing complaints from residents about noise and nuisance violations. There's a virtual meeting today where our alderman is going to try and mediate an agreement between the neighbors and the restaurant owner which may involve a solemn vow to get his bouncers to stop trying to frisk people who aren't trying to get into the restaurant. Listening in on these meetings (this is the third attempt -- the restaurant owner no-showed the first time and his lawyer no-showed the second) has been an absolute fucking hoot. I have no real stake in it (I haven't encountered real issues from the restaurant but would LOVE for them to turn their music down in the evenings) so for me it's just Humans In Action.

[delphinidin4]

wait. you're telling me they just come out of the restaurant, stand on the sidewalk, and forcibly frisk passersby??? is that even LEGAL???!

[delphinidin4]

[deejay]

[jaeausten]

I just can't imagine why you're still single. Don't see a ring on your finger. Nobley! No, it's alright. I asked for it.

[lucydacusgirl]

The first leg hair I saw on a woman was my own hair on my own legs. My mum is very naturally hairless and I knew like one woman who didn’t shave her armpits. When people talk about just preferring being shaved and doing it for themselves I do wonder like, how many women with body hair have you ever actually seen? In real life or not? Because I feel like there are places you could go nearly your whole life only seeing your own, and then hardly ever even seeing your own because you’re always shaving it! And it’s just like well yeah of course having no body hair just feels right to you. You have no frame of reference for hairy women outside of like jokes and insults.

[russiawave]

[hoothootmotherf-ckers]

just the fucking power move of van helsing pulling a fucking bonesaw out of his medical kit and proceeding to break into a house with it

what a fucking vibe

[delphinidin4]

At my alma mater, we had this tradition called “Senior Night”. It was on the night before the last day of classes. The students would “decorate” the professors’ offices and then barricade themselves in the academic buildings to try to keep the professors out, the reasoning being that if they couldn’t get in the building, they couldn’t hold class. One year the seniors barricaded themselves in the Science Center and (minus the one door that was kept unguarded for fire safety) they chained all the doors shut with bike chains. But they had one set of doors they didn’t have a bike chain for, so they tied that one shut with a fuck-ton of baling twine (y’know, the stuff they tie haybales with). Anyway, the art prof showed up in the morning in a bathrobe and a bike helmet and walked around the building trying all the doors while the students mocked him, and finally found the one shut with baling twine. At which point... he pulled a hand-saw out of his bathrobe, stuck it between the doors, and proceeded to saw through the baling twine, thus opening the door.

Same energy.

[delphinidin4]

I found the photo of Bob in his bathrobe!

Also please note the professor trying to get into the ground floor window and the student attempting to haul him out by his legs:

[historical-fashion-polls]

which outfit would you rather wear? (1897)

left 🩶🖤

center 🩶🩶

right 🖤🤍

Remaining time: 5 days 10 hours

requested by: @culumacilinte

request: Late Victorian rational dress - divided skirts, cycling trousers, etc.

commentary from the curator: hopefully this is close to what you were looking for! I think left and right have cycling trousers/bloomers as well as skirts. if you wanted something else though, let me know and I'm happy to see what else I can find! ☺️

[delphinidin4]

Time for Kate Beaton's Velocipedestrienne cartoons!!!

[jewishjon]

If this was originally posted on tumblr it would have become the big new trend within hours

[Image description: a tweet from Twitter user @ow_riki reading: ‘Had a dream that the new Twitter fad was to post a picture of a giant isopod photoshopped into historical events and going “Eugene! Not again!!”.’ It has 2,794 likes, 68 quote tweets and 797 retweets. End ID]

[charzone]

eugene you scoundrel!!!

[image ID: the ides of march painting with a giant isopod edited in at the front. end ID]

[jewishjon]

It’s happening…. Eugene has arrived….

[gorgug]

Here’s an easy to use Eugene for all your meme making needs, friends

[Image ID: An image of a giant isopod on a transparent background. End ID.]

[moniquill]

Poor Eugene takes so much blame; here he is mourning the death of of his teacher, Socrates. Eugene is a learned crustacean.

[regallibellbright]

[ID: The Death of Socrates, painted by Jacques-Louis David, with a giant isopod edited under the bed mourning with the rest of Socrates’s students. End ID]

[delphinidin4]

[Image ID:

Image 1: an engraving of the burning of the Library of Alexandria. Eugene the Isopod sails away from the carnage in a small boat. It is captioned, “Eugene! Not again!”

Image 2: a painting of aristocrats being guillotined during the French Revolution. Eugene the Isopod shares the platform with the sans culottes. It is captioned, “Eugene!!!!”

Image 3: a photo of the burning of the Hindenburg. Eugene sits watching, appearing darkly pleased with his handiwork. It is captioned, “Jesus fucking Christ”

/end Image ID]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

today, a severe thursday watch will be in place.

remember everyone...

thursday watch: the conditions for thursday are here, but a thursday incident has not yet been confirmed

thursday warning: thursday has arrived

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[hppjmxrgosg]

you shut your mouth.