Delphinidin

Our lives shall not be sweated from birth until life closes; Hearts starve as well as bodies; Give us bread but give us roses.

[delphinidin4]

[deejay]

[jaeausten]

I just can't imagine why you're still single. Don't see a ring on your finger. Nobley! No, it's alright. I asked for it.

[lucydacusgirl]

The first leg hair I saw on a woman was my own hair on my own legs. My mum is very naturally hairless and I knew like one woman who didn’t shave her armpits. When people talk about just preferring being shaved and doing it for themselves I do wonder like, how many women with body hair have you ever actually seen? In real life or not? Because I feel like there are places you could go nearly your whole life only seeing your own, and then hardly ever even seeing your own because you’re always shaving it! And it’s just like well yeah of course having no body hair just feels right to you. You have no frame of reference for hairy women outside of like jokes and insults.

[russiawave]

[hoothootmotherf-ckers]

just the fucking power move of van helsing pulling a fucking bonesaw out of his medical kit and proceeding to break into a house with it

what a fucking vibe

[delphinidin4]

At my alma mater, we had this tradition called “Senior Night”. It was on the night before the last day of classes. The students would “decorate” the professors’ offices and then barricade themselves in the academic buildings to try to keep the professors out, the reasoning being that if they couldn’t get in the building, they couldn’t hold class. One year the seniors barricaded themselves in the Science Center and (minus the one door that was kept unguarded for fire safety) they chained all the doors shut with bike chains. But they had one set of doors they didn’t have a bike chain for, so they tied that one shut with a fuck-ton of baling twine (y’know, the stuff they tie haybales with). Anyway, the art prof showed up in the morning in a bathrobe and a bike helmet and walked around the building trying all the doors while the students mocked him, and finally found the one shut with baling twine. At which point... he pulled a hand-saw out of his bathrobe, stuck it between the doors, and proceeded to saw through the baling twine, thus opening the door.

Same energy.

[delphinidin4]

I found the photo of Bob in his bathrobe!

Also please note the professor trying to get into the ground floor window and the student attempting to haul him out by his legs:

[historical-fashion-polls]

which outfit would you rather wear? (1897)

left 🩶🖤

center 🩶🩶

right 🖤🤍

Remaining time: 6 days 5 hours

requested by: @culumacilinte

request: Late Victorian rational dress - divided skirts, cycling trousers, etc.

commentary from the curator: hopefully this is close to what you were looking for! I think left and right have cycling trousers/bloomers as well as skirts. if you wanted something else though, let me know and I'm happy to see what else I can find! ☺️

[delphinidin4]

Time for Kate Beaton's Velocipedestrienne cartoons!!!

[jewishjon]

If this was originally posted on tumblr it would have become the big new trend within hours

[Image description: a tweet from Twitter user @ow_riki reading: ‘Had a dream that the new Twitter fad was to post a picture of a giant isopod photoshopped into historical events and going “Eugene! Not again!!”.’ It has 2,794 likes, 68 quote tweets and 797 retweets. End ID]

[charzone]

eugene you scoundrel!!!

[image ID: the ides of march painting with a giant isopod edited in at the front. end ID]

[jewishjon]

It’s happening…. Eugene has arrived….

[gorgug]

Here’s an easy to use Eugene for all your meme making needs, friends

[Image ID: An image of a giant isopod on a transparent background. End ID.]

[moniquill]

Poor Eugene takes so much blame; here he is mourning the death of of his teacher, Socrates. Eugene is a learned crustacean.

[regallibellbright]

[ID: The Death of Socrates, painted by Jacques-Louis David, with a giant isopod edited under the bed mourning with the rest of Socrates’s students. End ID]

[delphinidin4]

[Image ID:

Image 1: an engraving of the burning of the Library of Alexandria. Eugene the Isopod sails away from the carnage in a small boat. It is captioned, “Eugene! Not again!”

Image 2: a painting of aristocrats being guillotined during the French Revolution. Eugene the Isopod shares the platform with the sans culottes. It is captioned, “Eugene!!!!”

Image 3: a photo of the burning of the Hindenburg. Eugene sits watching, appearing darkly pleased with his handiwork. It is captioned, “Jesus fucking Christ”

/end Image ID]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

today, a severe thursday watch will be in place.

remember everyone...

thursday watch: the conditions for thursday are here, but a thursday incident has not yet been confirmed

thursday warning: thursday has arrived

[hppjmxrgosg]

"going out to get milk" is a common turn of phrase used to describe a man abandoning his family.

the "milkman" is a common figure in stories depicting a woman's infidelity and adulterous affair.

this implies that the ability to provide milk would both decrease the likelihood of a man abandoning his wife and children, as it would eliminate the need for leaving to get milk AND would secure that man's marriage, as his wife would have no need to seek milk from an extraneous source.

therefore, all men should produce milk, through various means such as:

- being a cow

- being an almond

- being a woman

- being a coconut

- being in the omegaverse

- being an oat

(list is exemplary and not finite)

in this essay, i will redefine the nuclear family and explain the seductive and inflammatory nature of the 1993 "Got Milk?" commercials.

[hppjmxrgosg]

you shut your mouth.

[placesandpalaces]

Castle Lednice, Czech Republic

[sorrowsofasoul]

[justcatposts]

Little girl teaching her cats how to draw a flower 

(via)

[hottiewitabloggie]

they’re? just? sitting there ???

[ladycavalier]

it makes it 100% better that i can’t understand her, i feel like i’m hearing what cats hear

[socialistexan]

[crtter]

Heh, she’s speaking Portuguese! Here’s what she’s saying:

*baby voice* “… and if you have any questions, just ask me! And now… yeah. And now you draw the roots. You draw them all twisted up! Got it? A flower? Now draw it. Did you get it, Luis Roberto? Did you get it, Jurandir? Look. Did you get it? That’s how you draw a flower.”

Luis Roberto and Jurandir are people names (Jurandir is especially a name associated with older men) so it’s extra funny that the cats are named that, heh.

[doodleoo]

what you learn from hobbies:

consistent practice opens up whole worlds of skill that you couldn't imagine

making mistakes in the process of learning is not only natural, it is also essential

activities that you enjoy can give you more energy back than you spent on them

wow everything is so expensive

[doodleoo]

my hands hurt

[justpassingbys-stuff]

[abbiistabbii]

The Germans really cooked making "Hobbyless behaviour" an insult. It is both devastating, applicable to a wide range of people and behaviours, and doesn't resort to swearing.

Man ranting on the internet about the Superbowl halftime show or complaining that something is "woke"? Hobbyless Behaviour. Girls mocking another girl for not looking right? Hobbyless Behaviour. Mindless vandalism? Hobbyless Behaviour.

It is more powerful than "get a life" or the English "You're Sad" because it gets to the central point of the matter, and that is wonderful. Danke, Deutsch.

[nimphelos]

of his [aldarion’s] first journey little is known, save that he made the friendship of círdan and gil-galad

[fandom-man]

[scholarlypidgeot]

@moethh don't hide this in the tags