A sea of people and vehicles fill the roads of Crossing, Calamba. It doesn’t matter what time of the day it is, the throng never seems to dissipate. People go to whatever commitment they have on that day, whether for work, school or casual meetings. Rows and rows of shopping malls, fastfood chains and commercial buildings occupy the side of the highway. Standing among these towering establishments is a small humble stall filled with various brands of newspapers ready for sale. In the midst of the noisy surroundings, a peaceful and unobtrusive man sits behind this stall. As a child who grew up familiar with the crowded streets of Crossing, I have always wondered just who the old man operating the business of selling newspapers was.
Mel Binay, a sixty-seven year old man, sells newspapers as well as cigarettes and candies by the side of J. Alcasid Building near McDonald’s. His position beside an electrical pole and a fire hydrant seems to obscure the little booth he set up. On the contrary, people who are not busy enough take time to stop by his stall to buy cigarettes – these are mainly security guards taking their breaks, or to read and buy newspapers. During the first few minutes of talking with Mang Mel, we asked him if it was okay to interview him and he apologized for only being able to show and tell that he sells newspapers.
He sells a variety of newspapers from tabloids like Abante, Tiktik and Bulgar to the likes of Manilla Bulletin and the Philippine Star. A small table filled with newspapers is set up within his area along with a large umbrella with the brand of Globe printed on it that serves as the roof. Two strings with tabloids hanging with the aid of clothespins can be found by the left and right side of the pole of the umbrella. Three prayers with the image of Jesus Christ attached using clothespins completes the layout of his small stall. He sits behind the table and patiently waits for possible customers. He starts his day by getting the newspapers “sa may-ari” (his supplier) at 4:30 in the morning. At this time, people with night shifts are just starting to be let out from work and people with daytime shifts are just starting to wake up. Mang Mel, however, has already set up his stall and is already waiting for customers.
Mang Mel didn’t start off as a man who sold newspapers. He was a man who worked abroad to provide for his family. He worked in Saudi Arabia as a contract worker for a year before going back home to the Philippines in order to attend to his mother’s funeral. He wanted to continue working abroad but when he found out that he and his co-workers will be asked to switch companies, he quit. The new company would be in Riyadh but he decided not to pursue it because the management is different. Therefore, he settled with living in the Philippines.
Now, he sells newspapers in order to support himself. He doesn’t see his family anymore, they don’t even talk. His spouse lives in the far region of Bicol with no means of communication with him. Originally from Batangas, he moved out to Calamba in 1984.
Even though he lives in Saimsim, he chose to sell newspapers in Crossing since more people can recognize him there. He tried to sell in Saimsim but “hindi mabili sa Saimsim”, as Mang Mel said. This is his fourth spot after the first one burned down along the old marketplace, the second one in another place in Crossing did not become recognized and the third one did not sell profit. Newspaper can be sold anywhere but he doesn’t mind the competition that he has in Crossing. Although he tells that it is hard considering this is his only means of living, he also says “iisa lang naman kami ng kinukuhanan eh” so he doesn’t really resent that fact.
Mang Mel has been selling at that spot since 2010. He has grown accustomed to the busy life in Crossing and in return, the people in Crossing has grown accustomed to him. The police did not kick him out since they already know him and even buy cigarettes from him during their breaks. The guards near that area and his “suki sa dyaryo” became his friends and they would have the occasional talk whenever they have the time. In over eight years of doing his job, he noticed major changes that happened in Crossing. Mang Mel pointed out the overpass that circles around the intersection and the massive buildings that weren’t there before.
If he were to choose another job, he wouldn’t change from selling newspapers. “Gustuhin ko mang magpalit ng paninda ko, hindi ako makakapagaplit. Syempre, puhunan din ang kailangan.” Mang Mel stated that since he is already a senior citizen, it is hard to get jobs that needs manual labor such as those in factories. There was a change in the number of newspapers that he sold back when he first started as compared to now. “Hindi kagaya noong ako’y bagong nagbebenta dito, umuubos akong 70 piraso na ganitong maliliit. Ngayon, ang 30 pieces, hindi ko pa maubos,” he tells. His profit declined because those who frequently bought from him had changed jobs or transferred to another place.
Among the newspapers that he sells, he said that Pilipino Star Ngayon and Bulgar are mostly bought since it doesn’t contain malice unlike other tabloids that have girls in bikinis as the front cover. Manilla Bulletin also sells a lot. When asked why these newspapers are bought more, he tells that people mostly want to read about “showbiz”. Other than his suki, people with office jobs and students also buy his newspapers. He doesn’t mind who buys from him so long as he earns profit. “Minsan sa pagbebenta ko, minsan mabenta, malakas magbenta, mahina, ganoon. Kung mahina, wala naman akong magagawa pagka mahina ang bentahan. Okay lang kapag talagang malakas, nagkakaroon ako ng kaunting kita. Pero kapag mahina, wala.” At the very least, he earns three pesos from each newspaper that he is able to sell.
“Kumita lang ako ng kaunti, okay na ‘yon. Magaling na kaysa mga sasama sa mga barkada, magnanakaw ka, sasama ka sa mga nagshashabu, mas magaling na itong ganito.” Eight years of selling newspapers has been the norm for Mang Mel. He doesn’t see himself selling other things nor doing another besides selling newspapers. The gigantic buildings have no say to the small stall of a man whose experience is louder than the busy streets of Crossing.
Bata pa lang ako, sanay na akong umuuwi sa Talim tuwing may pista o holiday – Semana Santa, Flores de Mayo, Pista ni San Francisco ng Assisi. Lagi kong madadatnan ang iba’t ibang putahe ng isda tuwing uuwi kami. Habang nagkakamustahan ang mga matatanda, tatakbo ako papunta sa dalawang duyang gawa sa lambat na nakasabit sa puno ng mangga sa likod ng bahay nila Lolo. Sabi niya sa akin, ang mas mababang duyan ay para kay Lola at ang mas mataas naman ay sa kanya. Hihiga lang ako sa duyan, masaya na ako. Pagsapit ng araw ng pagbalik naming sa Calamba, lagi kaming hinahatid nina Lolo at Lola sa pritil kung saan ang daungan ng mga bangka. Lagi silang may pabaong isda sa amin pag-uwi. Kapag paalis na ang bangka sa pritil, kakaway na sa amin sina Lolo at Lola habang nakangiti at nasa braso ng isa’t isa. Kakaway naman ako pabalik hanggang sa mawala na sila sa aking paningin.
Sa isang maliit na bahay sa Macambong sa isla ng Talim nakatira ang lolo at lola ko. Noong purong kahoy na bahay pa ito, dito na nila pinalaki sina Mama at mga kapatid niya. Ngayon, gawa na sa hollow blocks ang pader, may linoleum na ang sahig, at mas matibay na kahoy na ang pinto. Relihiyoso si Lola. Minsan, sinasamahan ko siya sa mga gawain niya sa simbahan. Takot naman ako kay Lolo. Disiplinado siya at medyo strikto. Isang sitsit lang, tahimik na agad ako. January 17 sa taong 1960 ikinasal sina Lolo at Lola sa edad na dalawampu’t tatlo at dalawampu’t walo, ‘yan ang kwento sakin ni Mama. Simple lang ang pamumuhay nila sa Talim. May lima silang anak: si Mama, Tito Tholay, Tito Thong, Tita Florita, Tito Pogi at Tito Arthur. Nagbebenta ng kakanin si Lola, at si Lolo naman ay nangingisda. May isang pagkakataon sa dagat kung saan naputol ang kanang palasingsingan ni Lolo. May telang nakasabit sa motor ng bangka na siyang nagpapaandar dito. Nadala ng motor ang tela at kasama nito ang kamay ni Lolo.
Dahil nga tindera ng kakanin si Lola dati, nahiligan na rin niyang gumawa ng ice candy tuwing uuwi kami sa Talim. Minsan, isasama niya ako sa mga gawain niya sa simbahan. Uupo ako sa likod at makikinig lang sa kanilang matatanda. Tuwing Semana Santa, magkakaroon ng prusisyon at isa sa mga nagbabasa si Lola. Madalas kong marinig noon ay “Tigil muna! Naiwan na ang mga matatanda!” Syempre, titigil muna ang mga nauna sa prusisyon at hihintayin ang mga matatandang nagbabasa na naiwan na dahil sa bagal ng paglalakad. Sinasamahan ako ni Lolo sa panonood ng prusisyon. Kapag dumaan na ito sa Macambong, kakaway ako kay Lola at sasama sa prusisyon pabalik ng simabahan.
Tandang-tanda ko ang petsa kung kailan namatay si Lola, July 24. Walong araw bago siya magcelebrate ng 75th birthday niya. Noong misa na para sa kanyang kamatayan, nahihirapan akong hindi umiyak. Noong tumingin ako sa kabilang panig ng mga upuan, nakita ko si Lolo. Diretso lang ang tingin. Walang bahid ng luha sa mga mata. Nasa isip ko nito, mag-isa na lang kakaway si Lolo sa pritil kapag pabalik na kami sa Calamba. Ilang buwan makalipas ang libing ni Lola, nalaman ng pamilya namin na may cancer din si Lolo. Prostate cancer naman daw. Maswerte na lang kung tatagal pa ng limang taon kung napagdesisyunang hindi tatanggalin ang organ. Malakas naman si Lolo noong panahon na iyon. Nakakalakad pa nang ayos, hindi pa buto’t balat ang pangagatawan. Hindi ko rin naman alam kung ano ang nangyayaring paggamot sa kanya noon dahil bata pa ako.
Simula noong bakasyon ng 2014, sa amin na siya tumira. Nandoon siya noong una akong nakatanggap ng award sa Gawad Parangal sa Rural. Nandoon siya noong tinibag ang kwarto ko para marenovate ang bahay. Nandoon siya noong bumaha sa loob ng bahay gawa ng pagpasok ng ulan. Nandoon siya noong bumili ako ng ticket para sa concert ng One Direction. Nandoon siya lagi sa may terrace, nakikinig ng radyo. Tahimik lang si Lolo. Kung hindi siya nakikinig sa radyo, nanonood siya ng TV. Lagi siyang nakikinig sa DZRH o kaya minsan, nanonood ng RHTV. Lalapit siya minsan sa akin para magpaload, o kaya kapag may ipapa-ayos sa cellphone niya. Minsan, mag-aabot siyang perang pambili ng binatog na dumadaan sa amin tuwing hapon. Tulog kasi siya sa mga oras na ‘yon kaya ako ang pinapabili niya. Paggising niya, may nakahanda nang binatog sa mangkok at handa na rin ng kutsara.
Nagdaan ang mga taon, nagsimula nang manghina si Lolo. Kinailangan nang ilipat ang kama niya mula sa kwarto niya sa taas papunta sa sala dahil hindi na niya kayang umakyat-baba ng hagdan. Nagsimula na ring pumayat si Lolo. Kapag inikot ko ang hinlalaki at hintuturo ko sa pupulsuhan niya ay may espasyo pang matitira. Ang ngiti sa mukha niya ay nababawasan kada pagkauwi mula sa check-up sa ospital. Hindi na rin siya masyadong nakakagalaw mula sa pagkakahiga niya sa kama. Binigyan siya ng doktor ng catheter dahil barado na daw ang daluyan ng ihi dahil sa prostate niya. Dahil kailangan ng sapat na atensyon ni Lolo, naging taongbahay muna si Mama. Siya ang nagsilbing tagapangalaga ni Lolo. Noong kailangan nang magtrabaho ni Mama, si Ate Sheryl ang pumalit kay Mama sa pag-aasikaso kay Lolo. Kapag may ibang ginagawa si Ate Sheryl, ako ang inuutusan ni Lolo. Pagkuha ng tubig, pagbangon sa kama, pagtanggal ng kulambo, paglagay ng pinagkainan sa lababo. Sa mga simpleng bilin niya, nagkaroon kami ng maliit na interaksyon.
Simula noong 2012, nilipat ang reunion naming mag-anak mula Bagong Taon sa Pasko. Noong 2015 ang unang Pasko naming na nasa kama lang si Lolo. Kasama namin siya sa pagkanta, pagkain, at pagsayaw kahit na nakahiga o nakaupo lang siya. Pagkatapos naming kumain ng Noche Buena, nilapitan si Lolo ng isa sa tito ko at niyakap habang nagtatawag ng kukuha ng picture sa kanila. Napansin ko ang pagkairita ni Lolo noon. Mukhang ayaw niyang magpayakap o kaya magpapicture. Dahil na rin siguro kasi naiingayan at naguguluhan siya sa amin kaya bugnot siya noon. Hindi mapigil ang tito ko kaya ayun, tinawag pa niya ang mga kapatid niya at nagpicture taking na nga. Hanggang sa kami nang magpipinsan ang kasama sa picture, hindi pa rin siya ngumingiti. Naisip ng magkakapatid nila Mama na sabihan si Lolo, “Ang gaganda at guguwapo ng mga apo niyo ‘Tay, ngiti naman kayo d’yan!” Sa wakas, napangiti nila si Lolo at hanggang matapos ang selebrasyon naming ng Pasko ay hindi ito nawala sa mukha niya.
Linggo ng gabi noong February 7, tinawag ako ni Mama para kumain ng hapunan sa baba. Nasa labas si Papa, nakikipag-inuman. Si Mama naman ay nasa taas na palapag ng bahay. Tahimik akong nakain sa lamesa noon nang marinig ko si Lolo na parang kinakapos ang hininga. Sinilip ko siya at nakita kong nahihirapan na siya sa paghinga. Nilapitan ko siya, bukang-buka na ang bibig ni Lolo para lang makahinga. “Ma! Ma! Si Lolo!” sigaw ko noon. Sandamakmak na emosyon ang naramdaman ko noong narinig ko ang bawat hinga ni Lolo mula sa kanyang bibig. Sa isang sigaw ko na ‘yon, bumaba si Mama at tinawag niya si Papa mula sa labas. Hindi ko mapigilan ang luha sa mata ko noong marinig ko ang mga salitang “’Tay, hintay lang. Papunta na dito mga anak niyo” mula kay Mama. Hindi ko alam kung may magagawa pa ba ako noong panahon na ‘yon. Hawak-hawak na ni Mama ang mga kamay ni Lolo para makapagbigay lakas kahit papano. Dumating si Tito Arthur mula sa pagkakaduty niya. Sa labas, inihanda na ang tricycle na pwedeng maghatid kay Lolo sa ospital.
Habang nakatayo malapit sa kama ni Lolo, nagdadasal akong mag-isa na sana huwag muna. Huwag muna ngayon. Pero hindi lahat ng dasal ay natutugunan. Salungat sa pananaw ko noong bata pa ako na walang malay sa mga bagay-bagay, noong mga panahon na iyon ko naalala ang kahalagahan ng buhay ng isang tao. Kahit sa mga pagkakataong hindi mo inaasahan, darating ang panahon na may mawawalang importanteng tao sa buhay mo. Halos isang oras ang lumipas, dumating ang St. Peter’s para kunin ang katawan ni Lolo. Bumalik ako sa kusina at natagpuan ang naiwan kong hapunan na malamig na. Hindi ko pa natatapos ang hapunan ko noon pero doon na nagtapos ang buhay ni Lolo.
Dahil may pasok ako noong linggong iyon, hindi ako nakapunta agad sa lamay ni Lolo. Nag-absent ako noong Friday kahit na hindi ko mapapanood ang musical na ako ang nagdirek para lang maka-uwi sa Talim. Sinundo ako ni Mama mula sa bahay at namili kami sa palengke ng mga kinulang na kagamitan sa lamay: kandila, paper cups, paper plates. Madami-daming dumalaw noon kay Lolo dahil magkakakilala naman sila doon sa isla. May mga dumating din na mga kamag-anak naming mula sa labas ng Talim. Umuwi si Ate mula sa Abu Dhabi para makasama sa huling pagkakataon si Lolo.
Kung noong namatay si Lola, hindi ko pa masyadong naintindihan ang mawalan ng minamahal sa buhay, ngayong namatay si Lolo ko nalaman na mas tumitibay ang pagsasama ng pamilya. Kahit na wala na ang magulang ng magkakapatid nila Mama, patuloy pa rin ang mga reunion naming tuwing Pasko. Nagkakaisa kami tuwing Araw ng mga Patay sa pagbisita sa pang-alaala ni Lolo at Lola. Nawala man ang mga pabaong isda na abot ni Lolo at Lola, naglaho man ang mga naghahatid sa amin sa pritil, hindi mawawala sa isip at puso ko ang imahe nilang dalawa habang kumakaway sa papalayong bangkang aming sinasakyan.
🚣 🚣 🚣 🚣 🚣
circa 2010
“Ang gaganda at guguwapo ng mga apo niyo ‘Tay, ngiti naman kayo d’yan!”
I have always wondered what it felt like to ride the bus of Philippine High School for the Arts. I always see a bus parked next to the waiting shed near the UP gate. On occasional times, I pass by the road to PCAARRD and have a glimpse of the entrance to PHSA but that’s about it. So when our class was told that we would be going to the said school for an exhibit, I was quite excited. I get to go inside PHSA’s campus plus, I get to ride the bus. And so on March 15, 2018, I get to experience what I’ve always been curious about.
Like any normal day, the sun was up, hitting anyone under its path with beams of golden light. As the bus went up the mountain, my ears started to get clogged from the pressure of high altitude. There was almost nothing to see save for the tarpaulins of Filipino artists that PHSA has produced. The bus went left, the bus went right, until finally the buildings (would it be called buildings?) of the school emerged. The dorms of the students greeted us and honestly, it was a sight to see. To modernize nipa huts and make it into the living quarters and classrooms of the students, who would’ve thought of that? Lora Noreen Domingo, the mastermind behind the exhibit, was already there to greet us visitors. She was wearing a maroon top, high waisted jeans, sneakers, and a smile on her face. Being the kind host, she guided us towards the exhibit room.
Once I entered the exhibit room, I was quite surprised by the design of the room. Paintings of red and white, and the occasional yellow, were all over. I didn’t get to bask in the room’s bold arrangement just yet, but the room tour already started. She started with introducing the Asaytona clan, the ruling family of the Manobo-Lapaknon community. As she introduced each of the higher ranking members, I looked around and scanned the whole place. It was cohesive, to say, as the passionate hue of red made the objects of the exhibit into one. I was paying attention to her explanation but honestly, I could not see the pictures of the clan well since I was at the back of the group and my eyesight isn’t really that great. She moved on to explain the Panawag-tawag, a thanksgiving ritual of the community to Mambabadyang Hesus. It was also mentioned that this ritual also serves as the initiation for the would-be members of the community. Noreen mentioned that she attended this ritual and is now an honorary member of the community. It was also mentioned that this ritual also served as the initiation for the would-be members of the community. Noreen mentioned that she attended this ritual and is now an honorary member of the community. This piqued my interest since I am interested in rituals of different cultures. What did it feel lik when she was accepted as a member? It’s also quite interesting that back then only natives of Butuan can be allowed to practice their religion and culture but now, they are more open to other people.
This time around, as the group moved to the other part of the room, I got to see a clear view of the story Noreen was about to explain. It was about Datu Kalipa, who had a unique way of consulting Mambabadya. Much to my surprise, Datu Kalipa is actually Lapu-Lapu who only got the nickname because he repeatedly beat Magellan to death. It was quite disturbing, to say the least. Imagine having a nickname that originates from you killing a person. Next to the mural of Datu Kalipa were printed transcripts of the thoughts of Supremo, the leader of the bagani force, Rajah, their king, and Bai Yaonyaon, Supremo’s wife and treasurer of the clan. The transcripts were translated to English by Noreen herself and talks about the community’s culture and history. The passion of these officials can be felt once the transcripts were read. What stood out the most for me was their rule of always telling the truth. In their community, one must not tell lies as the community values the honor of their words.
Next was a video showing Noreen’s experience with the community as they search for shells. There was a variety of shells, the banisil, bagungon, and tuhil to mention a few. In this section, she explained the reason behind her exhibit’s name, Pagsulang. “Dili iyan musulang kung wala’y buog” was what Rajah Eddie Asaytona said. A translation to what he said was “An empty shell does not go against the current.” Pagsulang, in this sense, means going against the current.
The last of her exhibit were showcases of more murals and stories, the community’s clothing, and the letters of the community to the urban people. It was said that the clan wears an alternative to their traditional clothing; they wear red shirts and bandanas and their own made accessories. The murals illustrate the gore of Datu Calixtro who tore open a pregnant woman’s stomach and pulled out her intestines, and Supremo’s childhood memory of their endless land. Noreen made clear that the community feels a certain prejudice from the urban people, that they are undeveloped. As she was explaining this, a melody started to resonate within the room. It was a woman who was singing. Her voice switched from deep to reaching higher notes. It made my skin crawl, it was creepy. Although who am I to judge their when it is part of their culture?
It was in this part that she requested us to write a reply to the women of the community who shared their thoughts. I did not have time to write a reply since I was busy reading and observing the other objects in the exhibit, though I did read some letters of the community women. Those among the objects in the exhibit that were not fully explained were the leaves that can be commonly found in the community and their clan’s long list of history. The stack of papers tells of the clan’s start and foundation until Rajah Eddie’s reign. The prologue stuck to me the most.
“Ayaw gayod balhina and karaang utlanan sa yuta o iloga ang yuta sa mga ilo. Gamhanan ang ilang tigpanalipod ug siya ang molaban sa kanila.”
Proverbs 23:10-11
This verse fits the community’s way of thinking with their lands. It is theirs. They have created families and families within their community. Their land, which keeps getting claimed by outsiders, should be theirs. They have their rights. What’s the use of the Indigenous People's Rights Act if this keeps happening? As said in the explanation for the exhibit, this was Noreen’s way of showing the reality of the indigenous people. We should open our eyes to the situation that is happening in their land. As I exited the room and waited for the bus to take us home, it was then that I remembered that this community are people of the Philippines. They may not be as modern as most are, but they are still Filipinos. We share the same blood from our ancestors, the same color of blood. We share the same color of red.
Personal essays. When I first heard of this set of words, I thought, “Wouldn’t it be already personal since an essay written by a person will come from himself?” Wilfredo Pascual Jr.’s and Lora Noreen Domingo’s works gave me a new perspective to the definition of personal essays. In this aspect, personal essays are essays written to illustrate a writer’s particular experience or represent a writer’s opinion about a certain issue.
Sir Willy presented a few points in his talk during Pandiwa. He said that the state of unknown, when one does not know what he is writing about, is a powerful moment. He also stated a few steps on “how to write a personal essay”. Observe, stop and reflect, question the truth and your memory, sort these memories, write about the small things. As he said, an essay is about figuring things out. The unconnected pieces will be put together as an essayist. This made me realize that writing doesn’t have to be an elaborate creation; it could be about anything. It’s not about how people should know me, but it’s about how I want to figure things out. There is a significance to knowing and going back to one’s roots; this is what I grasped from Noreen Domingo’s exhibit Pagsulang. She rendered her experience in the Manobo-Lapaknon community in Butuan City through an exhibit and a chapbook. Through her short but meaningful time with the community, she expressed everything she learned, her thoughts, and her feelings. Writing is not just about having to declare one’s thinking. Writing, as cheesy as it sounds, is a way of life. One can discover more about himself and their roots. Through writing, one can unravel the truth about his roots and through this, the “state of unknown” will be cleared out.
“The dog days are over, the dog days are done…” How does one cope when their dog’s days are over?
Idiomatically speaking, dog days are the hottest days of the year between July and September and sometimes used to refer to the slower and harder days of the year. During these times, humans often have a hard time going through their day. Not only humans do, but also dogs do. In Visayas, there is a saying that goes “ting bitay og iro” which literally means “season of hanging dogs”. This originated from the old days when families who have nothing left to eat had to kill stray dogs in order to fill their empty stomachs. The human is full, but the animal is lifeless. So what happens when a dog dies?
Dogs are commonly dubbed as “man’s best friend” and viewed as the ever-loving companion. They bring joy and happiness to people they interact with, but most especially, their owner. There is a variety of breed of dogs: Corgi, Beagle, Labrador, Poodle, Chihuahua, Shih Tzu, Dobermann, German shepherd and even our very own Aspin or Asong Pinoy. No matter what breed they are, they all make loving pets. Most of the time, Filipinos have Aspins as pets since they are the most common breed in the Philippines.
Our family has owned two Aspins, a sheepdog, and four Shih Tzus (not including the puppies we’ve sold). Of all these dogs listed, we’ve lost two through death. Tikboy, the sheepdog, passed away due to old age and Tuskie, a Shih Tzu, passed away because of worm infection. Our family has expected Tikboy’s death since he was already thirteen years old. He has been our family’s dog even before my mother gave birth to me. What surprised us was Tuskie’s death since he is only nearing six years old. Imagine how I felt when I came out to throw trash only to find out that he’s dead. He was not moving.
Seeing your lifeless dog is a very difficult feeling. It even feels worse when you see them being buried. It feels as if you are passing through the so-called five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. It is hard, but here is what you should expect as you go through the recovering process.
It will take time. Nobody expects someone who has lost a loved one to recover quickly. Take your time. There will be times when you anticipate going home to see your dog only to remember that he or she is gone. The first few weeks will feel rough but after that, reality will set in. Acceptance, then, will come after. More often than not, owners bury their deceased dog as a memorial. Some even calls for funeral services where family members share stories of their dog.
Don’t feel guilty about their death. Michele Pich, a veterinary grief counselor, co-director of VetPets Therapy Dog program, and an instructor at Penn Vet’s Ryan Veterinary Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania says, “People tend to feel guilt either way. When an animal dies naturally, some people tend to feel that maybe they should have caught the symptoms earlier and that they could have saved their pet. When an animal is euthanized, the guilt tends to center around whether the timing was right.” Euthanasia is the practice of ending a life to alleviate pain and agony. Sometimes, owners would euthanize their dog to end their suffering instead of watching their dog die a natural death.
Let it out. Keeping your feelings in will only result to more grief. It is better to talk with someone who you can share your experience with. You have your family members and friends. You can even join a pet loss support group or talk to a grief counselor. There are a lot of channels in which you can release your feelings. You can write, you can take photos, you can sing, you can draw, you can do anything. As you release the sad vibes, you will find that slowly, your burden feels lighter.
Don’t throw it. If you still have your dog’s items, keep them. It’s totally your choice if you want to keep all or just some of the items. This will help in preserving a memory of your dog even in the simplest way. Your dog was an important part of your life and they deserve to be kept in your memories. Some dog owners keep their dog’s tail or a lock of hair, even if it sounds creepy. It helps them recuperate from losing their dog.
Irreplaceable. It is not advisable to get a new dog after losing one, says Dr. Lisa Moses, a specialist in Pain and Palliative Care Service in Animals’ Angell Animal Medical Center in Boston. You might be ready after weeks, after months, or after years even. If you or your family does decide to have a new pet dog, don’t be disappointed that they are not the same as your old one. No dog can replace another dog. Although, having one might help in uplifting your spirit and mood. After all, a dog is a man’s best friend. When you bring home a new dog and don’t feel disappointed about them, that is when you know have accepted what happened.
Bantay, Choco, Batchoy, Princess, Bruno, Blackie, Brownie, Whitey – whatever their names, each dog that you own is an addition to your life. It’s as if you have a child to take care of. The bond you created with your dog is special and one of a kind, and it could never be replaced. It is never easy but you will find out that after longing and finally accepting the reality of the situation, all sad and difficult feelings will be gone. As the saying goes, the dog days are over. Just remember that somewhere in doggie heaven, your doggo is wagging its tail to its favorite hooman.
Sa mga canteen ay may iba't ibang pamimilian na pagkain. Sa pagkakataong ito, may iba't ibang uri naman ng mamimili ng pagkain sa canteen.
Bakit nga ba namumukod-tangi ang canteen ng Rural? Dito, nabubuo ang iba't ibang mga samahan at kwento ng ligawan, ang sabay-sabay na pag-aaral habang kumakain ng almusal, at ang inaabangang work service ng mga seniors. Dito, magkakaibigan ang mga estudyante at ang staff. Sa bawat pag-abot ng bayad ay may sukli itong ngiti at saya sa mga mamimili. Kung sa mga magkakaibigan ay may mga roles ang bawat tao sa loob ng tropa o barkada, kapag pumasok ang isang indibidwal sa Rural canteen, may role din siyang ginagampanan.
Iilan lamang ang mga sumusunod sa mga karaniwang tipo ng mamimiling makakasalubong mo sa canteen ng Rural araw-araw.
Pabili
Kung may kaibigan kang laging nagsasabing “pabili naman ng kanin”, “pabili ng ulam” o kaya naman ay “pabili ng lunch ako na magbabantay ng table”, sila ito. Low-key bwisit ang mga ‘to. Makikisingit sila sa pila pag malapit na ang kanilang mga kaibigan sa counter. Mga tamad pumila pero sobrang sipag mang-abala. Di mo alam kung unaware ba o sadyang bastos. Minsan, in waves pa dumarating. Tipong isa o dalawa lang ang pipila pero lima pala ang makikisabay.
Sak-Pat
Ang mga Sak-Pat ay ang mga estudyanteng bibili ng kahit anong produkto at magbabayad ng sakto tsaka naman nila ipapatong ito sa lalagyan ng kending nakahilera sa counter. Kapag nakapila ka, may mga panahong magugulat ka na lang dahil sa braso ng Sak-Pat na may hawak na baryang biglang sumulpot para bumili. Ang kadalasang binibili ng mga Sak-Pat ay mga inumin tulad ng bottled water o Plus, o kaya minsan mga tinapay, biscuit, at wafer.
In and Out
Minsan tuwing lunch, may mga mga panahong mahaba ang pila sa canteen. Nakakatamad pumila para bumili ng lunch kay Ate Nida kasi mas matagal pa ang pinila mo kesa sa kinain mo. Tuwing ganitong panahon, tsaka naglalabasan ang mga In and Out. Mapapagkamalan silang Pabili dahil nagpapabili silang kanin sa kaibigan nila pero hindi diyan natatapos ang mga In and Out. Pagkatapos nilang magpabili ng kanin, lalabas sila ng canteen interior para bumili ng posibleng ulam sa labas. May chicken tempura, fried siomai, at barbecue. Sa ganitong paraan, nakakatipid sila ng oras sa pagbili at mas nakatipid pa sila ng pera.
Real Estate Agents
Kapag punuan ang canteen at mahirap makakuha ng table, andyan ang mga Real Estate Agents para sa inyo. Katulad ng mga totoong real estate agent na naghahanap ng tamang property para sa mga buyers, sila ang bahalang maghanap ng bakanteng table at sila na rin ang maglalagay ng kung anong gamit para maging table niyo iyon. Ang madalas na pinapatong nila sa table ay ID, bag, notebook, o handout para sa next subject.
The Express Lane
Sila ang mga dumidiretso kina Kuya Romy o Ate Vera para bumili ng pagkain. Kadalasang lumalabas tuwing lunch. Wala kang makikitang estudyante na Express Lane, madalas ay teachers ang mga ito. Hindi rin naman lahat ng teachers ay Express Lane. Sadyang mahigpit lang ang schedule ng mga ito kaya kailangang mabilis silang kumain.
ROTC
Kung may express lane sa mga teachers, may ROTC (pagpapaikli sa Reserve Officers’ Training Corps) naman sa mga estudyante. Matalas ang utak ng mga ROTC. Bago sumapit ang lunch, maririnig mo sa kanila ang mga katagang “Kuya/Ate, pareserve po!” kaya pagdating ng lunch ay may nakahanda na sa kanilang plato ng kanin at ulam na pinag-aagawan ng mga nakapila. Kukunin na lang nila ang pagkain sa unahan ng pila at diretso bayad na.
Traffic Cone
Eto ‘yung mga taong pipila nga sa linya pero di naman umaabante kaya naman ay maraming naiirita sa kanila. Minsan may kausap na kaibigang napadaan lang sa may pila at hindi na napansin ang lumalaking gap sa pagitan nila ng taong nasa unahan niya. Nagreresulta ito ng matinding traffic kaya naman sila ay tinatawag na Traffic Cone.
Indecisive
Sila ‘yung mag-oorder ng pagkain on the spot. Ma-pe-pressure na lang sila pag tinanong na ni Kuya Romy kung ano ang ulam nila at wala silang nagustuhan sa mga nakahain sa kanilang harapan. Mga kawawang bata kapag tuluyan nang naubusan ng pagkain. Siguro ay bibili na lang sila ng hotdog na kaninang umaga pa niluto o kaya ay magpapakabusog na lang sa cup noodles.
Freshie
Hindi naman sa Freshie talaga sila pero nagmimistula silang ganito dahil hindi sila sumusunod sa tamang direksiyon ng pila. Mahilig mag-counterflow, kumbaga. Baka naman kasi baguhan kaya di niya alam ang tamang entrance at exit ng pila. Minsan, mga upper na tinatamad sumunod sa unwritten rule na ito ang gumagawa nito.
Wholesome
Akala mo rich kids sila pero buo lang pala talaga ang kanilang baon. Sila ang mga kasabay mong 1000 o 500 pesos ang ipambabayad kahit na mga 50 pesos lang ang binili niya. Kung kay Ate Vera ka bibili, papalipatin ka niya kay Ate Nida para bumili ka—este, mabaryahan ang buo mong pera. Kapag lunch naman, sila ang dahilan kung bakit nababadtrip si Ate Nida sa gitna ng katanghalian.
Commoner
Siyempre, hindi mawawala ang mga commoner. As their name suggests, sila ang mga pangkaraniwang mamimili sa canteen ng UPRHS. Mga estudyanteng pipila nang maayos at tahimik, hindi matagal sa pagpili ng ulam, at (higit sa lahat) sapat ang pambayad—walang labis, walang kulang.
Kahit anong klase ka man ng mamimili sa canteen ng Rural, hindi maikakaila na madami kang mabubuong alaala sa lugar na iyon. Ang canteen ng Rural ay hindi lang lugar na pinagtatambayan tuwing break, lugar din ito kung saan nagkikita ang mga magkakaibigan sa magkakaibang section, nagtitipon ang mga grupo para sa activity o groupwork, at nabubuo ang mga samahang matatag at tumatagal ng mahabang panahon. Pati ang mga teachers may mga nabubuong masasayang alaala sa lugar na ito. Kahit Pabili, ROTC, Traffic Cone, Commoner, o kung ano ka man, paniguradong hindi ka lang mabubusog sa pagkain sa canteen ng Rural. Mabubusog rin ang puso mo sa mga sandali at mga alaalang hindi mo malilimutan.
Siyempre, hindi lamang dito nagtatapos ang listahang ito. Marami pang ibang klase ng mga mamimili sa canteen. Sa spectrum ng mga mamimili, alin ka dito?
Kung pagod ka nang gumawa ng inuutos ng magulang mo o kung tapos mo na gawin ang requirements mo o sadyang wala ka na talagang magawa, manood ka ng TV. May variety of channels ka to choose from: noontime shows, teleseryes, home shopping, balita, sports, lifestyle at iba pa. Pero bago ‘yan, syempre, buksan mo muna TV mo. Kunin mo ang plug ng TV na madalas ay nasa likod na maalikabok. Pagkatapos ay ipasok mo ang patusok na plug sa butas ng electrical outlet. Ingat lang, ‘wag magsaksak kapag basa ang kamay. Baka sumabog pa ang saksakan at ikaw pa ang maibalita. Pagkatapos ay kunin ang remote control ng TV at pindutin ang power button. Siguraduhin na nakatapat ito sa TV. Kung ‘di mo itinapat, katangahan ‘yon. Kapag ayaw talaga gumana, ihampas mo ang remote sa any hard surface — lamesa, upuan, o mukha mo, para mabuhayan ng loob ang nanghihinang baterya. Kapag nagkapicture na ang TV, bukas na ito. Kung wala pa rin at ginawa mo na lahat ng ito, baka naputulan na kayo ng cable o kuryente. Bayad bayad din ‘pag may time.
Isang lindol ang yumanig sa Calamba noong gabi ng Disyembre 10 sa taong 1999. Kasabay nito ang panganganak ng isang babae sa kanyang sanggol. Dahil sa masyado raw malaki ang bata, kinailangang biyakin ang tiyan ng babae. Nang timbangin ang sanggol, tumataginting na apat na kilo ang bigat ng bata.
Dahil halos labintatlong taon ang pagitan sa batang ito at sa kanyang nakatatandang kapatid, parang lumaki na rin siyang mag-isa sa kaniyang tahanan. Noong nagsimula siyang makipaglaro sa labas ng bahay, puro lalaki ang kanyang mga kalaro. Ito marahil ang dahilan kung bakit maitim ang kanyang tuhod at may mga peklat sa mga braso at binti. Hindi siya lumaking naglalaro ng bahay-bahayan, lutu-lutuan at mga manika. Kinalakihan niya ang baril-barilan, holen, pogs, teks, at paglalaro ng pekeng espada.
Kaya hanggang sa pagpasok ng paaraan ay dinala niya ang bargasin na pagkilos. Napapa-away sa mga kaklase at madalas napapagalitan. Ngunit hindi ito naging dahilan para panghinaan ng loob. Nag-aaral siya sa sarili niyang bilis at pamamaraan. Napansin ito ng kanyang mga guro kaya madalas siyang pinaglalaban sa mga kompetisyon.
Ngayon, hindi na siya masyadong bargasin at hindi na siya masyadong ipinapanglaban sa mga akademiyang kompetisyon. Hinahanap pa niya ang daan sa maaari niyang tahakin para maging sarili niyang tao.
