Why do I quiver when I see a pair of beautiful hands ? I don’t even have to see the face of the hands look a certain way, if my eyes see something my soul was meant to digest my body shakes and I just need it....this sux
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@karlolah
Why do I quiver when I see a pair of beautiful hands ? I don’t even have to see the face of the hands look a certain way, if my eyes see something my soul was meant to digest my body shakes and I just need it....this sux
Junji Ito // Hayao Miyazaki
The world if your favourite band is the Beatles:
The world if you fucking hate the Beatles:
Young Frankenstein (1974) dir. Mel Brooks
2020 in one film clip.
25 years of ads peeled away
A warning
tomorrow
comedic dramatic irony is one of my fave tropes
hannibal: “it’s always nice to have an old friend for dinner ;)”
me, shoveling cheese crackers into my gaping maw as i watch him season and roast a man’s leg: yeah i bet it fucking is you cannibal fuck
dracula: “i never drink… wine ;) ;) ;)”
me:
watching nbc hannibal and/or some versions of dracula is like being in a theatre and shouting “HE’S BEHIND YOU” at the protagonist as they repeatedly fail to spot the villain goofing around behind their back and it’s exactly as entertaining as it sounds
This blew my damn mind
I fucking KNEW there was a difference between address and address!
You address a person by their name.
You give someone your address.
i hate this god damn bastard language
think we can get all 10 plagues by the end of june?
look. look at this beautiful sword meme. i’m going to cry
@petermorwood
I saw and reblogged this one a while back, but it’s always worth repeating, and this time I’m adding a bit of background info comparing common fantasy sword features to the Real Thing (with pictures, of course.)
Leaf-bladed swords are a very popular fantasy style and were real, though unlike modern hand-and-a-half longsword versions, the real things were mostly if not always shortswords.
Here are Celtic bronze swords…
…Ancient Greek Xiphoi…
… and a Roman “Mainz-pattern” gladius…
Saw or downright jagged edges, either full-length or as small sections (often where they serve no discernible purpose) are a frequent part of fantasy blades, especially at the more, er, imaginatively unrestrained end of the market.
Real swords also had saw edges, such as these two 19th century shortswords, but not to make them cool or interesting. They’re weapons if necessary…
…but since they were carried by Pioneer Corps who needed them for cutting branches and other construction-type tasks, their principal use was as brush cutters and saws.
This dussack (cutlass) in the Wallace Collection is also a fighting weapon, like the one beside it…
…but may also have had the secondary function of being a saw.
A couple of internet captions say it’s for “cutting ropes” which makes sense - heavy ropes and hawsers on board a ship were so soaked with tar that they were often more like lengths of wood, and a Hollywood-style slice from the Hero’s rapier (!!) wouldn’t be anything like enough to sever them. However swords like this are extremely rare, which suggests they didn’t work as well as intended for any purpose.
I photographed these in Basel, Switzerland, about 20 years ago. Look at the one on the bottom (I prefer the basket-hilt schiavona in the middle).
A lot of “flamberge” (wavy-edge) swords actually started out with conventional blades which then had the edges ground to shape - the dussack, that Basel broadsword and this Zweihander were all made that way.
The giveaway is the centreline: if it’s straight, the entire blade probably started out straight.
Increased use of water power for bellows, hammers and of course grinders made shaping blades easier than when it had to be done by hand. This flamberge Zweihander, however, was forged that way.
Again, the clue is the centre-line.
Incidentally those Parierhaken (parrying hooks - a secondary crossguard) are among the only real-life examples of another common fantasy feature - hooks and spikes sticking out from the blade.
Here are some rapiers and a couple of daggers showing the same difference between forged to shape and ground to shape. The top and bottom rapiers in the first picture started as straights, and only the middle rapier came from the forge with a flamberge blade.
There’s no doubt about this one either.
The reason - though that was a part of it - wasn’t just to look cool and show off what the owner could afford (any and all extra or unusual work added to the price) but may actually have had a function: a parry would have been juddery and unsettling for someone not used to it, and any advantage is worth having.
However, like the saw-edged dussack, flamberge blades are unusual - which suggests the advantage wasn’t that much of an advantage after all.
Here’s a Circassian kindjal, forged wiggly…
…and an Italian parrying dagger forged straight then ground wiggly…
There were also parrying daggers with another fantasy-blade feature, deep notches and serrations which in fantasy versions often resemble fangs or thorns.
These more practical historical versions are usually called “sword-breakers” but I prefer “sword-catcher”, since a steel blade isn’t that easy to break. Taking the opponent’s blade out of play for just long enough to nail him works fine.
NB - the curvature on the top one in this next image is AFAIK because of the book-page it was copied from, not the blade itself.
The missing tooth on that second dagger, and the crack halfway down this next one’s blade, shows what happens when design features cause weak spots.
So there you go: a quick overview of fantasy sword features in real life.
Here’s a real-life weapon that looks like it belongs in a fantasy story or film - and this doesn’t even have an odd-shaped blade…
Just a very flexible one…
If you want more odd blades, Moghul India is a good place to start…
i could not ask for a better addition to my meme post than blade education thank you so much
that Diana Wynne Jones interview where she’s like “I don’t understand why so many girls are into Howl, it must be because they want the challenge of fixing him” is so optimistic, like DWJ’s out here hoping I at least want to make him a more functional person as if “rogue academic turned melodramatic fashion disaster whose social skills Do Not live up to his own hype” is not a perfectly valid thing to be attracted to
@corvidscorpse said: People who aren’t morosexual just don’t understand those of us who WANT a complete dumbass
DWJ, a reasonable woman: behold this undesirable man. look at him, he dresses weird and he keeps emotional support spiders and doesn’t even question people moving into his house without asking and he has to reverse psychology himself into doing anything he’s actually supposed to do.
every morosexual in a 100 mile radius: oh fuck yeah babey
god this isn’t even touching on the fact that Howl is??? apparently??? an ordinary-ass Welshman who was studying spells (????) at the doctoral level and then (somehow???) found a doorway into Actual Magic and promptly moved there to set up shop as a wizard with like five different names and two outfits but still goes home sometimes because he loves his niece and likes to hang out with the rugby lads (still working on processing Howl being a jock but?? okay), because PRESUMABLY all of this is supposed to further illustrate that Howl is an absolutely ridiculous sort of person but all I see is a man who made the exact decision I would make in a millisecond if given the opportunity
Howl Jenkins is what happens when the overpowered ‘thrust into a fantasy world’ man… is not the main character.
Howl Jenkins is what happens when an a normal man gets thrust into a fantasy setting and is mostly excited to dick around and learn some magic to turn his hair different colors, only to realize to his dismay that being a powerful wizard means that people are going to ask you to actually do shit for them
“Mmmf”
Pocahontas (1995) dir. Mike Gabriel & Eric Goldberg
gentle reminder
stop scrolling for a second, please
breathe in
breathe out
and remember that all your troubles will eventually pass
things will be okay
Let’s all be honest, every last one of us wants to stand in the mouth of a dark cave holding a flicking torch in one hand and a sword in the other.
remember: the ‘holy’ white doves are just white rock doves, aka the common pigeon!
Doves are just pigeons with white privilege
me: [walks into a psychic’s shop and slams down my tarot cards] it’s time to duel
whenever i get really stressed about life i doodle positive affirmations onto index cards because i’m lame as hell
Long time but...
So been quite some time since I been in here. Saddened to see it change but change it inevitable and happens everyday so focusing on making this my art blog once more and as such I do want to look into commissions and getting that going but I have no clue where to start so asking for help and advice if anyone would like to help a fellow artist who is tired of not being able to use her craft for the greater good