the dregs as things john mulaney said:
jesper: [groans] you know, life.
kaz: I’ll keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die.
nina: in terms of like, instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin.
inej: I don’t know how to lightly make fun of people. I can’t be like, “Ah, look at your shirt!” I have to be like, “YOUR WIFE LEFT YOU.”
matthias: why do people do that? people always shush animals. they’ve never spoken!
wylan: I’ve never been in a fight. you can probably tell that by looking at me.
kuwei: I am very small and I have no money. so you can imagine the kind of stress that I am under.
nina: so we started chanting, McDonald’s, McDonald’s, McDonald’s! And [kaz] pulled into the drive thru, and we started cheering and then he ordered one black coffee for himself and kept driving.
jesper: anyone who’s seen my dick and met my parents needs to die. I can’t have them roaming around.
wylan: I think Emily Dickson is a lesbian.
inej: this is an on fire garbage can….could be a nursery.
kaz: sometimes babies will point at me and I don’t care for that shit at all.
kuwei: [kaz] gives off a vibe of….right away he’s like, “do not fuck with me.” my vibe is more like, “hey, you could pour soup in my lap and I’ll probably apologize to you.”
matthias to kaz: you have the moral backbone of a chocolate éclair.
jesper: [about college] it was the worst financial decision I ever made in my life. I paid $120,000 for someone to tell me to go read Jane Austen and then I didn’t.
wylan: none of us really know our fathers… ANYWAY
jesper, probably: I once said “hello” to balloons.
kuwei, definitely: Do My Friends Hate Me Or Do I Just Need To Go To Sleep?
the dregs prior to meeting kaz: I was just shiny and dumb and easy to trick.
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
