Hello, I am now doing Tf2 and Postal requests!! BUT there is a catch. It’s all Scout and my favorite dudes! No other mercenaries or side characters. Just my many variations of him. These requests will be short in length and my idea of how the they will be, so expect that.
REQUESTS ARE CLOSED
Here is the list of the Scouts I am writing for:
-The Red Scout (From all of the official animations, comics and game)
-The Blu Scout (My own interpretation inspired by other media)
-The Red Scout (Lil Pootis)
-The Blu Scout (Lil Pootis)
-7th comic Scout (WILL INCLUDE SPOILERS; and my own head canons for his children)
-EPIC SCOUT! If you haven’t seen the sfm, I’d be shocked
-Magnificent Nine Scout (He is too cute not to be in here)
-New Again Scout (Emo Scout! https://youtu.be/7mBLE9cW35M?si=qheLbQ8RdLAoGBoM)
-Boarder Taunt Scout (Yes, I’m going for the obscure ones. https://youtu.be/Zh-gbW0lOCY?si=yUaJgQ7-VpbTbVUt)
-Ass Pancakes (Freak Fortress) (YES EVEN HIM!)
-FEMSCOUT!! Or genderbent versions of any Scouts listed above.
POSTAL:
-Postal (1997) dude (PLEASE SPECIFY PRE OR DURING POSTAL! No Redux version! Hate that guy)
-Postal 2 dude (My short king)
-Postal Doe (You MUST specify from which game or media)
-Movie dude (my favorite 💕)
-Shtopor (Corkscrew rules)
There will be more to come if I can see to it.
Boundries:
-Can be romantic or platonic, PLEASE SPECIFY IF IT IS A ROMANTIC X READER OR PLATONIC! just no Child/reader at all.
-No NSFW, but might be open if it’s SUGGESTIVE and nothing more!
-None of the Scouts are Abusive in any form, so don’t send that crap in! The dudes are questionable, but I still ain’t writing it!
-I will always write for disabilities, conditions, diseases and mental disorders, however, please understand, I might not have the most experience with them. Understand I will be doing my best to write for something I do not have.
-I should have also included that I am not Transgender, Gay or a male. This is NO ISSUE to anyone who wants to request something!! Please understand that I might not be able to portray the experience in its entirety. I’m more experienced in the Bisexual catagory is all.
-Other characters can be involved, but the focus will be on Scout. Example: “Can I request Scout x reader who is best friends with Pyro?”
i've found this website to be horribly lacking in lil' pootis versions of scout x reader, so I would adore it if we could get some of that.
specifically BLU. because i love lil pootis! BLU scout with my entire soul.
i just need to lay in his lap and kiss him all over. that is all i request. romantic kisses everywhere, and gender neutral if you can, please.
I beg.
I absolutely love this request and have been waiting to do it!! I love Blu scout and I headcanoned so hard, I realized I was a yumeshipper 😳
Hope you enjoy!
Lil Pootis!Blu Scout romantic headcanons
-Now, he isn’t the most intimate guy in terms of physical affection, but if you want to give him kisses and snuggle up to him, he is not going to say no! He gets kind of shocked once you get into it after asking, just sitting there while you smooch all over his face. Pressing your lips to every inch of his skin. If you wear lipstick, he will forget that you have it on. Then you just laugh at him because he is absolutely covered in kiss marks. Then he holds your face and starts to kiss you too. It gets passionate very quickly, but it ends with lots of giggles between the two of you.
-(Might let you give him a kiss on the cheek, so he can walk around with the mark on his face… Maybe…)
-Most of your cuddles will be in private, he prefers to keep that to the two of you. But he doesn’t mind putting an arm around your shoulder while talking to friends or hugging you to his side. His favorite positions are lounging on top of each other or sprawling his legs across your lap to annoy you. He does it with a big sigh too. It’s really the only thing he initiates. He doesn’t have a reason for it, he doesn’t hate cuddling, he just prefers other modes of affection like quality time. It can go hand in hand at times.
-After a long day of work and you just want to lay on his lap, he will oblige. He has a habit of absentmindedly and slowly scratching your scalp. Combing through your hair. Sometimes he will tell you stories in French to help you sleep. If you do end up falling asleep, he is likely going to as well. I’ve mentioned this in the past, but I like to think the sounds of breathing make him sleepy, so you both just fall asleep together.
-This one is a bit more suggestive, but I like to think he is good at making out. He is older, so he has some prior experience. If it’s your first time, he would be very light with you. No rushing, deciding what you do and don’t like, how to do certain things. He’s not very attentive, so you have to tell him what you do and don’t like, otherwise he won’t notice. He likes to hold the back of your neck and head while making out. But if you already have experience, he gets comfortable quick.
-He loves a good massage. He’s either working out or working with the team, so he’s always sore. Please give him massages and kiss his back, he will just feel the tension leave his body. He will always give you one in return, but I’m gonna be honest, it might not be the best you get. Though, I like to think he would be down to just put all his weight onto you. It doesn’t have to be sexual, he could just hold you down and keep you in place. He’s not large, he’s lean. But he’s still pretty strong and it feels nice to have that pressure against you.
could I request romantic headcanons of either New Again Scout or RED Lil Pootis Scout with a gn reader with joint pain and fatigue? :3 whichever scout you'd most prefer to write or like. both. if you have the energy. but no pressure of course!
also idk if you do anon signs offs but if you do I'd like to be /paint splatter anon :3
I’m actually in a flow state with these requests, a few more and I’ll open them back up!!! :333
New Again!Scout and Lil Pootis!Red!Scout x reader with joint pain and fatigue
New Again Scout:
- While not on the same level (obviously), he injures himself quite often, so he knows how to remedy some of the pain. I headcanon that he both a mercenary and in a band with some of the members from the Blu team, so he’s constantly getting hurt. His favorite is to try and stay active. He does this by going on runs, but since you have to be gentle with yourself due to the pain in your joints, he encourages you to do something lighter, while also keeping yourself moving.
- If you live with him, you likely live in a city apartment not far for him to commute to his job out in the Badlands. He will take you on long walks around the city, stopping to rest if you’re tired. He doesn’t mind stopping, he will sit with you until you’re ready to go again. He also carries extra stuff with him all the time, since he’s always out and about, so he always has snacks on him. He will make sure to bring water and an ice pack fresh from the fridge before you go out.
- The only downside to city living is that your mattress isn’t the best. You basically live in a dingy little apartment with your shared mattress (It’s not a bed, there’s no headboard and it’s on the floor) with a TV and a nightstand in the corner. He gives you the extra pillow and blanket to try and relax the stiffness in your body, so you can sleep better. Anytime you ask for a massage before bed, he will deliver. He wants you to feel good before going to bed.
- He stays up super late most nights and is always out either for work or his band is playing. But if you need sleep, he will either start going to bed with you or leave you in the bedroom to let you sleep quietly. He just wants you to get some good sleep and not wake up feeling badly. Overall, he wants to see you feel better and will do anything he can to help make that happen.
Lil Pootis!Red Scout:
- He looks into how to help, asking Engineer to read him the books he picked up from the Teufort library (before they burned them). There isn’t much knowledge around this time, but he gets a general idea of what to do. Since you are Pootis’ second parent, he will also teach him about joint pain to help him better understand and not question what is going on at inappropriate times.
- He is going to try and get you into healthy eating! I feel like this version of Scout specifically is a health nut, at least later on, and while he still drinks Bonk!, he and Heavy have tried to have a better diet. He will always make sure Heavy makes you a sandwich or that Sniper has some extra fried lizard for you to get some protein in. He will even buy some fruit that you can take with you as a snack in your day-to-day tasks, like bananas or grapes.
- Very much exercise-focused. In the morning, he likes to do stretches with you to help you get some relief in the morning. Even if you complain, he still encourages you to get up and do them with him. Even Pootis will encourage you (Yes, he does stretches with you guys!). Stretches are very important so that you don’t lose your ability to use your muscles as you get older. If it takes you a while to get into it or takes you a bit longer to stretch, he will take his time with you. He cares about you a lot and will always be patient with you.
- His favorite thing to do with you is to go swimming. There is a beach not far from the Red base and sometimes the team will go out on a little day. Engie will bring his grill, Heavy makes sandwiches, Scout brings Pootis with little floaters on his arms! He found that swimming was a nice way to get you moving without being too rough. And you get to relax in the sun afterwards too!
p2 headcanons for reader experiencing their period? 😵
Postal 2 Dude x reader with their period
-Despite what most might think, I feel like he would actually be super helpful. Yeah, he can stop by the store while he’s running errands. Though, I can’t guarantee that most of what he picked up was paid for or not. His excuse would be that you should get pads for free. He would also grab some junk food or sweets you can indulge in. Maybe grab some Cock Asian for dinner. You likely won’t get what you need until the end of the day when he comes home, so in the meantime, just lay in bed with Champ. Or smoke some of the pot that he’s been growing in his trailer.
—If you ever bleed through your clothes, he would honestly just give you his trench coat because it would cover everything. And if you get embarrassed about the fact you bled in public, he would pull you aside to a private place and reassure you that it’s ok. He pees on people sometimes, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.
-I can’t lie, I think he’s a believer that periods make you emotional (I mean, they do, but you shouldn’t be reduced to that) and would likely assume you’re gonna be bossy because his ex wife was the same way. But when he sees that you’re only irritated because of the cramping and you aren’t taking your discomfort out on him, he actually offers to give you a massage. I like to think he gives the best massages ever and if it wasn’t for his snide comments towards others, he could’ve been a masseuse.
-If you get sad because of your period, he holds back the urge to tell you to get over it, not going to lie. He doesn’t really understand. But then when you kind of snap at him, he backs off. Then he comes back with dinner and quietly snuggling up to you as an apology. If you ever cry during your period, he likes to wipe your tears with his hands on your face. He won’t say much, just wiping them away.
-Honestly? He might just skip running errands for you two to have a day together. Just to lay down with you and watch trash TV. Cuddling up next to his side while he rubs your back. He will listen to you complain or ramble. Just lounging around lazily all day, not worrying about a thing because he’s right there with you.
aah hii!! this is my first time ever requesting a fic and i'm so nervous HAHAHA
ok ok, so. can i request an angsty fic including younger P1 Dude(like around 23? 22? before he's 27 and wreaking havoc in Paradise basically) with like a slightly younger therapist girlfriend? by slightly younger i mean like she is around 18/19, not underage!! (yes i'm self projecting. 😒🙄 aren't we all?) . it can be based on an argument they're having, specifically because Dude's mental health is worsening and he is pushing everyone away including reader, and the usually comforting reader is only trying to help him out before he lashes out and she starts talking back this time etc. etc.??? maybe the ending might be them making up or something worse happening but i want to leave that to u if it's okay :> I RLLY LIKE YOUR WRITING STYLE AND HOPE YOU SEE THIS AHHH!!
Heyyy it’s been 7 months 😭
I am going to try and be more consistent, though I do not promise many short stories with headcanons in the near future to be consistent.
-So, my version of Pre-Postal 1 Dude is just a pretty chill guy. He likes the simple life; a house to take care of, his dog and his partner to share it all with. As far as mental health goes, he takes good care of himself. While he doesn’t go to therapy as much anymore, mostly due to finances, he sees a psychiatrist every once in a while for medication. His job gives him good insurance for medication and even has a pharmacy in store. While he is high functioning, he still has his days and has had to take off of work or cancel plans due to his mental health.
-He probably met you through his job. As I have said before, he is a maintenance man at the EZ Mart. Doing the repairs and putting in fixtures around the store. Out of trade school for sometime, he got this job after his certification and he has a side business of doing repairs for people who call him. So, he’s about 22-23 at this time. I’m not going to headcanon much about the ages, I just imagine you two being young and trying to get your lives together. You trying to get through medical school and working to afford your apartment with your roommates and him trying to pay off the house left for him by his parents.
-Whether it was from him fixing something in your home or working with him at the mart or something else entirely, you fell for the repair man. And he reciprocated in flattery. I mean, you were very caring, he enjoyed your presence, you both had the same desire for a simple life together and you were pretty good at taking care of things, how could he not? But after the honeymoon phase and things got more serious, you learned of his mental health little by little. The amount of prescriptions in his cabinet, the way he was tedious with his cleaning of both his house and himself, how he would let his worries slip. He would talk to you about his OCD and Paranoid Personality Disorder as he felt it was only fair to give you a heads up that it might influence the relationship. But you chose to stay.
-Life was simple. Nothing crazy besides a rough work day or barely scraping for bills once in a while. But one day, you noticed that his personal hygiene got absurd. Hours and hours and hours of showering, scrubbing his skin over and over again. The paint on the bathroom wall started to bubble. His water bill shot up so much, you had to work overtime. Then it was the hoarding. A massive artillery of weapons. Installing locks on the doors.
-Each time he went, you tried to reel him in. And each time, he pulled away. It was weird. He was still taking his medication, but he was getting worse somehow. You tried to convince him to get help. Tried to convince him to go to therapy. But he brushed you off every time. At some point, he stopped getting up for work. Or in the morning at all. He was restless throughout the night, scared of what he would see in his sleep. After making him dinner, you would try to convince him that you didn’t do anything to his food (except sneak his medication in, which you had to pick up because he hasn’t left the house). Often catching him talking to someone that wasn’t there.
-Your job didn’t pay enough to provide for the house and utilities. Notices and overdue bills lined your once cleared dining table, voicemails from his work and questions from your employer as to where he has been. Stress and grief boiled deep inside your heart. You wished you could do more than you already have, but nothing was working. One day, you came home in the afternoon.
The sounds of the creaking door filled the vacant kitchen. Holding your breath. It reeked. You haven’t had time to clean since you got overtime.
You kind of missed when he would clean, even if it was excessive. You can’t stand the smell of old garbage when you come home anymore. Champ walked out of the open bedroom down the hall and jumped onto you. At least you had your lovable pooch!
Pulling your bag off of you and slipping off your shoes, you approached the shared bedroom. The brown mutt waddling behind you. Gently, your hand touched the door. He jumped at the noise, rising from the nest that was your bed. He wasn’t awake, he never slept. His left eye started to get a twitch from it. Moving his greasy, brown locks behind his ears.
“Hey,” You spoke softly, “how are you feeling?”
He stared for a moment. Sluggish.
“I’m alright.”
The springs groaned when you sat down, as if they hated the state they were in as well. Your hand gingerly touched his arm, rubbing his veiny forearm. His heavy eyes looked at your face. His breath hitching. The humming air conditioner was white noise to your silences. Your hand danced up to his bicep, feeling the work he used to do. Up his chest to his face. Oily from his hair clinging to his face. He pulled away instantly.
“Don’t. Stop.”
Your smile dropped. He didn’t like your touch before your after-work shower.
“Ok.”
You breathed in. Then out.
“Just lay down.” He said.
Head beside his hip. No hand on your head, no warmth. The breeze from the AC blew onto your already freezing legs. The ceiling fan above you was gathering dust on the edges of its blades.
“Honey.”
Nothing was said for a moment.
“Yes, dear?”
“I found this place. A clinic.”
“Stop that. Stop, won’t you?”
“It can really help you!”
“I’m not leaving this house!”
Those heavy eyes towered over you.
“I can’t. It’s bad enough you go out and bring the filth back into my home!”
Swiftly, you moved from underneath his gaze off the bed.
“What are you even talking about? What filth?”
“You would leave me if I told you.”
“Just tell me!”
His Adam’s apple bobbed.
“There’s bad things outside. They’re trying to get to us.”
“Bad things?”
“Diseased people. They are all sick.”
“Honey, everything is fine. No one is sick.”
“But they are! And you’ll be too. Please, stay here with me. I don’t want to lose you.”
“You won’t, you won’t,” haste in your words, “But I can’t just stay here either.”
Strong hands gripped your shoulders.
“Please, don’t go outside!”
“Dude.”
“I can’t lose you. Please,” a sob croaked out, “please.”
He sniffed.
“Please.”
His hands flailed to his face and he turned away. Closing in on himself.
In times like these, you turn to the vanity across from the bed. Pictures adorned the wall above it, dust gathered on the edges of the frames. Pictures taken by friends you used to see. Pictures of moments, seemingly long gone.
SUNFLOWER "ANON" HERE AGAIN RGHHAHHHHHHH (i prefer sending anon asks)
timeskip scout with a dilf hunter reader /j /sfw🙏
reader meets scout (and the rest of the team) again after 7 years and now he has kids and a shitty mullet, immediately goes *neuron activation* after seeing how great he is with his children
reader fr being not the step parent but the parent that stepped up 🙏
HEY ANON!!!!!!! (I totally get you)
I am so happy to get this request, because I think about this SO often! I was already into Scout before, but him becoming a Dilf was NOT on my 2024 bingo card 🗣‼️‼️
I have made another fic about Dad!Scout before, so here’s the link if you wanna check it out!! https://www.tumblr.com/kingqueensoobscene/770802320729669632/you-got-it-boss-i-wrote-this-as-a-romantic-scout
COMIC!SCOUT X DILF LOVER!READER (SFW)
-In the beginning, you met Scout working as a mercenary and while you joined the last out of the 10, you quickly became good friends. Being the 2nd youngest out of the 10, you and Scout had more in common. Comic books, TV shows, action figures, collecting cards. As a skilled defense, you worked well with Scout. Scout created a distraction long enough for you to knock the enemy Soldier from behind. Or for him to grab the intelligence while watching his flank. Then there was always celebrating wins together with spiked Bonk! on a late afternoon.
-Over time, you wanted the one you could not have. The unrequited crush he had on Miss Pauling, who you felt would not like him back considering she devoted 10 years of her life to a woman, made you feel sad. And Spy noticed those nights you spent sitting alone in the common area, morphing into color to tell you that this was all pointless. You only shrugged. You couldn’t help who you were attracted to. The fabric of his gloves brushed along woven cloth as he moved from his hand from his head to his eyes and rubbed them. Reassuringly, Spy told you you were an open book and Jeremy can’t read. As stupid as it sounded, he was right.
-Most of the team, some uncaring for it, knew you liked Scout. And it wasn’t that you acted like an idiot in front of him or that you flirted or even act jealous when Miss Pauling was around, you did none of that. It was how you looked at him. You looked past all of his stupidity and his overconfidence and you saw how he actually was. A sore loser who wanted to be liked. He told you all of the things that bothered him; how he couldn’t kill that one dumb Blu Sniper that keeps getting a hit on him no matter what you two strategized and how he viewed the other mercenaries as the family he missed back in Boston. He was oddly sacred when it came to his family. He liked not being alone and being around the loud and despite being the least strong, being capable of helping out his team and getting the chance to prove himself. And how everyone knew that you saw him as something other than a Masshole. And they really, really doubted you.
-Down the line, with the help of Soldier, Miss Pauling found the scarce Australium thought to be gone from the Earth. After getting out of Australia, you found yourself in the maw of the Administrator and the many other teams of mercenaries. After the purpose of the entire manhunt for this element was found to be futile, you moved on. That was it. Moving on in life after the administrator was dusted was difficult. A harsh reality that the 9 other guys you started to see as people other than your coworkers, you would most likely not see again. It’s wasn’t so bad though; you got a good job, still did the things you loved, had a good social life too. You just missed one thing very much, your friend.
-It was a shock when you found Soldier in your apartment when you came home from work. He gave you a big ol hug that knocked the wind out of you while two weights held your legs down to Earth. Two kids? Zhanna and Doe had children?! Soldier quickly brushed you off, saying that Merasmus wanted to hurry and explained that you were the only one the rest of the team couldn’t find. You were the only smart one who threatened to sue unless you were given a compensation package and a new identity. You were taken, not by choice, though you didn’t complain, to the city of Boston.
-When you arrived with the entirety of Heavy and now Soldier’s family, it was on the steps of the house of a boy you used to know well. Honestly, you were nervous, but excited. You had already caught up with Heavy and Medic the whole car ride there. Drifting to the back of the line as Heavy entered with the turkey the unattended Miss Pauling bought the team and Soldier’s kids practically dashed under the legs of everyone. Then you saw him. His hair all shagged out and his face with no traces of his 20’s anywhere. His eyes widened and a smile grew.
“You goober! I thought I wasn’t gonna see ya tonight!” He said as he pulled you into a squeezed hug.
It lasted for a couple more seconds before Scout looked down. A little boy tugging at his legs.
“Daddy, can me and Patton and Georgia go play outside?” A small boy with yellow goggles on his face asked.
“Hmm, I dunno. Dinners about to start. Why don’t you wait until after dinner, alright?” Jeremy ruffled the boy’s hair.
“Alright dad!” He ran off back into the kitchen.
You were honestly kind of surprised. You knew he wanted a family, but you never expected how good of a father he would be. His kid didn’t seem to throw a fit about waiting, instead just listening to him. Your crush just got revamped entirely. Your mind became moments of the days you spent on the rooftop talking about his Ma and his family. It seemed weird to be passionate about, but the impression was given that he wanted to have kids of his own to take care of and be a better father than the man who was absent. Giggling was loud in the living room where you saw 5 more kids, two of which were Soldier’s.
“You have 4 children?!”
Jeremy only laughed. “You too, huh? Yeah, everyone’s so shocked.”
“I mean, it has been 7 years.”
“Yeah, but that just means we got lots of catchin’ up, huh?” He punched your arm.
“For starters, where’s your lucky wife? You nudged his side, smirking.
“Got none. All deadbeats, the last three. Doesn’t matter, they’re my kids and I’m gonna raise ‘em right.”
Despite the circumstances that you wish were much better for the children’s well-being, this just got so much better for you.
“But I love my lil boogers.”
He ran up behind the running girl who had a purple skirt and a grey sweater on. He picked her up under her arms and brought her to his face.
“Isn’t that right, my lil booger?” He kissed the girl’s cheek and she giggled more.
He set her down gently and made an explosion noise. Another girl, a redhead, came up and asked if she could be exploded and you chuckled. But he did it, he lifted her up, gave her a peck on the forehead and set her down making a crashing noise. He was really good with kids. Maybe you would take him up on that offer to catch up.
-Eventually and habitually, you often visited his home on the weekends. He wasn’t really a fan of leaving the kids home alone, so he liked having you over for dinner. He has a recipe book his mom got him that he uses almost every time he makes dinner. She copied all of the recipes from their family, saving the originals and made them into a book for him when his family visited for Christmas (After the holiday party with the team). It is some of the most delicious food ever.
-During the spring, he brought out the toy cars for his kids to run around with in the backyard. While he was inside making lemonade, the brown haired girl, Tanya, ran up to you.
“(Name)! (Name)! We need someone to be the helpless victim to Tommy’s castle.” She shook your arm, her balaclava that was way too large for her face flopped around as she did so.
“I guess I’ll have to be saved by the princess assassin once again.” You woed dramatically as she dragged you along to Tommy’s little sandbox.
Tommy had a plastic knights mask on, one he got for Christmas as he has told you ecstatically many times. Jeremy was a good listener when it came to his kids, since he was the youngest of 8 and was mostly given hand-me-downs and mostly unintentionally ignored at times by his Ma. So, since he has half the kids and more free time due to being technically in early retirement, he makes sure all of his kids get what they want. They are a little spoiled.
You were behind the green closed sandbox, where Tommy has “captured” you. You pretended to be tied up, with the imaginary chains behind your back. Tanya, Andy, the curly haired boy and Sierra, the redheaded girl, were huddled up and talking in hushed voices. Andy had on a red cape and his yellow goggles. You could never get him to take those things off.
“So we’re gonna tackle him?” Sierra asked.
“Duh!” Tanya exclaimed.
“Ok!”
They took after their dad so much. Going into things with one thing in mind. Tanya and Andy ran after Tommy and grabbed his legs, tumbling to the ground. Sierra grabbed your arm and led you to the playground set Jeremy had installed over the summer. She urged you to hurry up, so you climbed up the slide while she went up the rocks.
“We won!” She threw her hands to the sky.
You, on the other hand, “Are you ok, Tommy?”
Andy was looking down at his brother, biting his lip. Tommy lifted up the plastic top of the knights mask and you could a smile on his rosy face.
“I’m ok!”
You took the slide down and went up to him.
“You sure?”
“Mhm!”
“Good,” you helped him to his feet, “because I need a knight to help me win against an assassin.”
Tanya whined and looked betrayed.
“What? No fair!”
“You were fooled, it was a trap!” You grabbed a foam sword.
Tommy giggled manically as you both ran after them. You didn’t hit the 3, you couldn’t, but you pretended to slash them with a “shh!” noise. Then you heard a loud laugh to your left.
“Heh, oh man! That’s something. C’mon kids, come get your drinks.” You saw Jeremy had come back.
The kids dropped what they were doing and ran to the cookies and lemonade. You walked up to Jeremy a little rosy.
“I hate to say it, but I betrayed your daughter.” You chuckled.
“Yeah, I saw that.” He smirked.
After putting the kids to bed, Jeremy walked you out the door.
“Hey, uh, thanks for taking care of my kids when I would step away.” He leaned his elbow against the doorframe.
“That’s nothing! You’re great with your kids, I’ve never seen kids be such good listeners.”
“Heh, well, their dad is an amazing guy.” He chuckled.
Then there was silence. You hesitated. Jeremy looked at you with a squint and a smile.
“You okay?”
“I have to tell you something to tell you. And it’s going to be hard because it might ruin things between us.”
“Oh yeah?” He smiled, unserious.
“I- ok, so I have known you for a long time and you are one of the people I care about the most. I know it’s been a long time, but those feelings have come back again. I know you have your kids and I know that’s the life you want, which is totally fine! But now that we’re older, I wanted to tell you and get it off my chest.”
He leaned closer, waiting with an eager smile.
“I have always liked you.”
“That it?”
“That’s all.”
You could not look into his eyes. You did not want to see him angry or in disbelief if this would be the last time you ever talk to him again. You feel awful, but you need to tell him otherwise you would regret it again.
“Is it because I’m a dad now? Because i always knew I was smokin’ hot, but I never knew that’s what it would take for you to tell me.”
Then you started to laugh. And he laughed. And you looked at him now. He was just looking at you.
“Do you like me?” You asked.
“Well, no. But now I’m thinking why the hell I didn’t.”
And there was another moment of silence again. For once in his life, he actually thought about his words. It would take some serious rekindling before he would consider dating you. His kids come first and that is something he makes clear from the beginning. To be honest, he has thought about you for some time. He’s trusted you for years, and now he knows he still can.
“I dunno, maybe this could work. But, hey, uh, just gimme some time. I’ll have to find a babysitter.”
I’m gonna rant about my self ship for a minute if I may. CRINGE ALERT 🚨🚨🚨
I LOVVEEEE Evil Ernie!!!!! I love him!!!!! I recently got a lot of the comics and I feel closer to him. He would listen to Exodus while we drove on his cool bike. He would raise the dead for me. He would be a loyal partner (I mean, look at how he was with Lady Death!). I want to take him to see Megadeth live. I want to hold his hand. UGGHHHHHHH
