dee's crazy stuff

there is a fiction in the space between you and me

[kkuriseumaseu]

A hardcore fan of Elsa from Arendelle. #babysinging #frozen #cutebaby #princesselsa

[kkuriseumaseu]

Don't grow up, it's a trap! (at Mendiro Gulurejo Lendah Kulon Progo)

[soukxing]

[kkuriseumaseu]

istg i never see him in sexual way but now. why. why. why.

[kkuriseumaseu]

The road ahead is hard. Anyone who says otherwise is simply lying to themselves. You will stumble, you will fall. Maybe you'll trip over your shoelace. Or lost between trees and soil. But that's okay because your goal is the light that will guide you. And as long as you keep on moving, you'll be fine eventually. . . . . . . . . . Or not. Ha. Life will fuck you up so bad until you're all crippled. Eat that. #explorewestprog #morningquotes #ndasmu #inspiring #gundhulmu #scenery #morning

[kkuriseumaseu]

A little rants [1/?]

Mungkin agak berlebihan, mungkin terlalu dalam aku menyelam. Mungkin aku terlalu merekatkan diriku. Dan terlalu jauh aku mendefinisikan makna kebersamaan kita. 2 tahun 9 bulan 15 hari saja. Bagi sebagian orang yang telah menjalani hubungan bertahun-tahun mungkin apa yang kita punya ini tidak ada apa-apanya. Tapi bukankah waktu merupakan ukuran yang terlalu relatif untuk mengukur perasaan seseorang? Karena pada kenyataannya kehadiranmu pernah sedekat nadi. Karena wajahmu pernah menjadi pemandangan yang aku lihat setiap aku terbangun dari lelap. Dan pelukmu pernah menjadi obat penenang di kala malam yang senyap terganggu oleh mimpi burukku.

Maffesoli melihat bahwa di dalam masyarakat modern terdapat sebuah fenomena dimana kebersamaan kaum muda lebih dapat disebut sebagai urban tribe. Kesamaan minat dan cara menikmati gaya hidup yang serupa menjadi ciri khas mereka. Ikatan yang ada di dalamnya longgar, tidak stabil dan tidak permanen.

Konsep ini merupakan bentuk kritik dari subkultur. Sebuah platform perlawanan bersama. Dengan ikatan kuat di dalamnya, subkultur berusaha melawan kultur patronnya, normalitas sosial, dan ideologi dominan.

Dan bersamamu kita adalah keduanya.

Kita merekat karena jalinan pemikiran, selera, dan ketertarikan yang sama. Tangan kita bertautan dan berusaha merobohkan tembok-tembok besar penuh keraguan akan apa yang kita miliki. Engkau adalah satu-satunya urban tribe-ku. Satu-satunya subkultur yang aku labuhkan identitasku di dalamnya.

Kamu melebihi itu. It used to be us against the world. Our love against the odds. But you were the odd. You were the world. And it turns it is my war against you.

[kkuriseumaseu]

In stepping into a new phase of a journey you need to understand that this artificial life of ours is something that can be destroyed in a matter of seconds. It's not being skeptical, it means you know exactly the end of the road you're taking. Quoting one of my favorite characters of all time, “This is your life, and it’s ending one minute at a time.” #life #quotes #blackandwhite

[elizabitchdarcy-deactivated2017]

The shooter’s father has stated “this has nothing to do with religion” with regards to his son’s actions. 

His son saw two men kissing a few months ago in Orlando and it made him angry. This was homophobia. This was a hate crime. Do not pretend that it was anything different.

[plantables]

It’s the month of Ramadan, a holy month in Islam. Part of the rules for Ramadan is not to fight or be violent. The shooter clearly didn’t follow Islam to the letter and this was not in the name of religion.

[lightspeedsound]

so on one hand we have a Muslim father who is apologizing for the crimes of his son against LGBT people and saying how his son’s actions were motivated by hatred and wants to “apologize for the entire thing.”

And on the other hand we have the white Stanford rapist’s dad who is telling the world to feel bad for his son because he just wanted 20 minutes of action and now he can’t eat steak like he used to. 

….but tell me again you racist pieces of shit about how it’s Islam that’s the anti-feminist, misogynistic religion.

[kkuriseumaseu]

Kemarin sore senja mengambil lara dan menukarnya dengan tangan terentang untuk memelukku hingga terlelap.

[babyanimalgifs]

baby animals blog

[nothingtosee970]

[kjessart]

they look like a mom and dad called into the principle’s office because of their child’s problematic behavior on the playground 

[steverogersnotebook]

[thesecretletter]

Part of me wishes we never dated, because then I would still have you in my life. I would still have your friendship. I would still be able to call you up whenever I needed. You would still be my best friend.

Your secrets are safe here (via thelovewhisperer)

[iwriteaboutfeminism]

You're not excited about the prospect about voting for the first Democratic nominee who's a woman that'll bring an end to 240 years of cisgender, straight dude presidents?

I am as feminist as they come, and I feel no excitement or pride at the possibility of Hillary Clinton being the first woman to be President of the United States.

It’s not just about being a woman; it’s about what you represent.Hillary Clinton does not represent the average American woman. She represents capitalism, imperialism, the military industrial complex, and the corporate and criminal justice interests that form the institutional structures which actively oppress average women (and men, and people of all genders) every day.

So no, I’m not excited. 

[pyobaps-deactivated20220719]

hyemi’s the last original member left my heart is literally shattered into a million pieces this issnt a joke im in so much pain

[deceive-remade-deactivated20171]

are U a dolls person or a drama person… hurt locker person or sleepless night perswell guess what it doesn’t matter because my dreams are dead

[kkuriseumaseu]

It’s a letter for you, and a reminder for me.

Dear you,

We met in one of strangest ways people could ever have. And since the first time I know you, I had no plan on walking with you this far. But apparently fate has its funny way to connect people. Those words of yours are something I’m holding onto until right now. That we’re connected by fate, meanwhile the purpose of this connection should be decided by ourselves, right?

For 21 years 3 months and 15 days I have lived so far, you’re probably the best thing I’ve ever had in my life. Loving you for 2 years 8 months and 18 days is the process I’ll never forget until my last breath. I have learned so much in the journey of loving and building a relationship with you. I’ve learned how to be a woman, an experience that wasn’t just physical but also a spiritual journey for my soul.

Looking back to the past, we have gone through so many things and I’d rather not mention them because for me what happened give no benefit but strengthened us and gave meanings to our relationship. But one thing that I know for sure is that from what we’ve been through, I know I can be a better person with you. I might take things slowly but I know I will arrive to a point where I can tell that I’ve been positively transformed according to what I projected.

Loving you has taught me how to be a woman with more patience. It makes me keep on trying to see the other side of every coin. Loving you has taught me to control my emotion and start using my rational mind to face every obstacles God has given upon me. Loving you has taught me to try to speak out my mind, to tell people how do I feel, no matter how bitter it is. The love you give keeps on reminding me that there will be someone who pat my shoulder and tell me, “It’ll be alright”. For that, I want to deliver my biggest gratitude and thanks for the love so big you give to me all this time.

And in this relationship, as far as I can remember, I keep on trying and looking for better ways to love you until I forgot the most important part. I forgot to love myself. I forgot to love Dita that has been processing with me even longer than you. All I cared about was how to accept your love and sipping on it all the time. I hold onto “I love you”-s that spilled out of your lips whether directly or via text messaging. I kept on making you and our relationship as a mirror for me to look at myself. All I’ve done was to make you love me. And when few days ago you wanted to slip away from my life, to cut off all ties and love you have given for me, I lost my ground. Aku limbung. And things have turned dark all of sudden.

And I think it’s the one that drag me down right now. The lack of love I give to myself is the one that pulled me down into a deep and dark abyss. And I’ve been so blinded until now. All this time it was your arm that I held onto and it made you tired. I made you pull me forward and it drained your life. I’m terribly sorry for that. I have no intention to suck the life out of you in this relationship.

I don’t know if it’s too late or not, but all I want to do now is to fix myself. To add more love for myself. To find what’s lost and to fix what’s broken from me. I want to be the girl who made you fall in love again, not the one who begged you to stay loving me.

I want to be given the opportunity to assemble pieces of my life I have left behind to chase you. I want to try to fix the relationship I have with myself. I couldn’t hold onto my logic and stood on my own feet anymore. You were right, I wasn’t independence. And apparently it took an event this big to slap me, a thing I no longer want to experience in the future.

Thus, while I learn how to walk again, to understand the person I’ve buried alive, the one I’ve abandoned for the past year, I have this little hope that I can still stay on your side as your lover.

Few days before, right after when you wanted to dump me, I was thinking that I wanted to redeem myself to you. I have done you wrong so much due to my lacks and shortcomings. And I wanted to tell you that meanwhile I’m fixing myself I still want to be your Sera, your Gyul, and most of all I still want to be Richard’s Dita. I want you to let me hold your hand and walk by your side through everything that we called future. And I wanted you to know that I will be stronger not just for yourself but for myself as well. I wanted you to let me be the place you lean on when the weary world outside upsets you and tires you out. I thought that I can find myself without losing my steps with you. I know that I’m ready to let you go because eventually I will learn how to be okay again but all I could see in my mind was if I let you go I’m sinking down. I wanted to tell you I chose to stay for everything we have went through, everything we’re going through, and everything we will go through in the future.

I wanted to tell you that I want to be happy woman and I want to share my happiness with you in a situation where you’re happy as well.

But if you still have the same thought as you did few days ago, that you think this relationship is impossible to be fixed, that I am impossible to be better, well you know what we have to do.

The court is in your hand now. If you still want to try this with me, I’m all opened to talk about suggestions and mechanisms with clear mind. But if not, I wish we can be parted as good friends and remain as closest ones. It will hurt so much but they say time heals everything.

I loved you before, I love you when I wrote this heartfelt open letter, and I will always love you when I’m 80 and lying down on my deathbed. (This sounds corny but I do mean it, you know I do.)

 From yours truly,

 That insane girl who fall head over heels to you for the last 2 years and 8 months.

      Ps. I wish I can meet you for a day or two for the last time if we’re about to break up. It’s my last wish, I guess.