KLAU @kldne - Tumblr Blog

vexheart

ilikesoupandcookies

for rain you are, and to rain you shall return

Every single day, I miss you more and more.

starwarsgrl77

jessyourhusband

— Sara Rian, from the collection Then Death Came

Your death certificate came in the mail. This was no surprise. I ordered the paper work. I knew it was coming. I knew it was that before I even opened the envelope.

Yet it still stung reading your name, and the words deceased, and death certificate all in one paper.

I miss you so much.

written-sorrows-inside

justagirl198310

There are mornings I can’t get out of bed. Not right away. Not for hours. The weight hits before my feet touch the floor.

Showering can feel impossible. Eating feels pointless. Plans get canceled before they even begin. Texts go unanswered. Tears happen in parking lots and bathrooms and behind sunglasses.

Sometimes I make it to work and pretend I’m okay. Sometimes I don’t.

Grief isn’t always poetic. It doesn’t always look like healing. Sometimes it’s blankness. Sometimes it’s rage. Sometimes it’s a torn toenail that causes an emotional breakdown.

Sometimes it’s remembering, again, that I can’t call her. And still can’t.

And still can’t.

I do what I can. And when I can’t, I wait until I can.

That’s it. That’s the whole strategy.

And today, I got out of bed. That counts.