Raja, Aja, and Jaja

I'm a 20 year old Sinnamon Roll from the midwest. I'll post some gay stuff, some nerdy stuff, and anything else that happens to catch my fancy.

[lgb-positivi-t]

it’s almost 2019 it’s time to practice SELF-LOVE

[knowlagispowe]

It’s almost 2020 it’s time to practice some SELF-LOVE

[knowlagispowe]

It's almost 2021 it's time to practice SELF-LOVE

[realsadjewishhours]

This was literally a hate crime.

[brokeshibe]

I'm about to go feral over this

[jolieing]

[thatiskarma]

What is going on here

[brucebocchi]

The Shining, But Cold

[agoutirex]

cranberry sauce

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[weaselle]

some graphic designer was on her good good shit that day

[littletantrums]

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[write-on-world]

[mysharona1987]

[knowlagispowe]

B&E and murder pretty cut and dry.

[forceawake-moved]

don't know how you guys get into greek mythology n all that by actually reading the iliad or whatever........ it's the twenty first century read percy jackson like the rest of us

[baapi-makwa]

[bimbinis]

[endangered-justice-seeker]

  New message from little Flint Princess!

  gofundme.com/f/TeamMariWater

[endangered-justice-seeker]

UPDATE

[destroymylife]

[whitmanic]

My mom kept all our baby teeth but she didn’t separate them so there’s just a box she had with like. Three sets of random teeth mixed around

[whitmanic]

Okay I’m so sorry this isn’t actually funny but it’s like. Really funny. I’m so sorry

[bigasspants]

wtf dogs lose their teeth. also who the fuck keeps baby teeth that’s horrific

[pottamux]

My mom kept my baby teeth. And then my second set fell out so I kept those in a little bag and now we both have a set of my baby teeth.

[chambylin]

wait what. how many teeth do you have im so confused.

[pottamux]

I had 3 sets of teeth. So did my older brother. It was weird cause I’d had them for a few years and then they all started coming out all at once. Had a full new set in like 2 weeks. My dentist said it was fine since nothing grew out of place so idk.

[whitmanic]

I’m sorry what you grew teeth like a shark? What?

[shadovvlurking]

When i was younger I watched my babysitter take a plastic bag containing all her baby teeth and crushed them all into powder under the leg of a chair bc she was bored

[whitmanic]

Excuse me?

[kallypsowrites]

This post is like getting punched repeatidly, but from a different angle each time

[magicemmett]

I have a small container with my own baby teeth. For some reason I can’t make myself get rid of them. My grandma also has my dads teeth, and his braces???

[knowlagispowe]

Give me your molars

[enjoloras-deactivated20220821]

The amount of parents I’ve met who’ve told me, as a soon-to-be father, how much kids ‘ruin your life’ makes me so fucking sad.

These are all people who had kids because it was ‘the next logical step’. Like they have this mentality of ‘Marriage? Check. House? Check. Well, guess we better have kids!’ And then bring small dependant humans into the world…and get upset when their lives are inconvenienced or changed as a result.

It really saddens me because there’s this damaging culture of children being part of the standard. So people who shouldn’t be parents (and I mean that in the simplest of terms - not in a judgemental way, but a ‘it’s just not for you’ way) feel pressured to have children and regret it. And then the poor child grows up feeling like a burden.

It’s not fair on anyone. The parents, the children.

As a post on this site once said - children and the decision to parent should be ‘hell yes or hell no’. If you think for any reason at all that you might not be big on raising kids, do not actively go out of your way to have kids. Having them won’t magically make you want them.

All the people I know who wanted - really wanted - their kids and to raise kids have said ‘it’s difficult but I LOVE it. I love being a parent.’

Can we please eliminate the idea that parenting should suck? And that having children is a necessary part of adulthood?

And can we please eliminate the idea that people who don’t want children are somehow lacking? And that those who do want children are doomed to misery?

Signed, a very excited father-to-be who understands it’s not something everyone wants or should want.

[anthropohedron]

You are delightfully naive. I wish you the best of luck with your new offspring. Check back in after a year or three of parenthood.

Kids do ruin everything, in the sense that you can’t grasp the scope of change they inflict until it happens. Everything changes, and no one expects just how much “everything” encompasses.

That doesn’t mean parenting isn’t rewarding! It doesn’t mean that these kids who have changed their parents’ lives aren’t loved. Parenting is hard work, and can bring you to tears, but then your kids delights you with something adorable they say or do. Or they spontaneously hug you and tell you they love you. Or they have a magic moment of really, genuinely caring for a sibling they mostly fight with. Or they wow you with their creativity and brilliance.

So don’t imagine that parents are regretting their decision to have kids when they say their kids ruined everything. They are acknowledging how their lives have changed, and they are commiserating with other parents, and they are (utterly futilely) trying to explain to people considering or planning on having kids just how big a deal it is.

I don’t really believe expectant parents will understand this until they’ve spent some time being parents, so here’s a bit of concrete advice they can use: puppy training pads. Buy a Costco-sized box of them and have them around the house and in the diaper bag and everywhere. Baby wipes are only narrowly more useful and essential. Bonus: put them in bed (possibly under the sheets, but whatever) so when mom’s water breaks it doesn’t soak into the mattress.

[enjoloras-deactivated20220821]

Hey! Fun fact! I have a 2 year old toddler, thank you for the condescending tone!

This was not about parenthood ‘not being hard’, or children not drastically changing your life.

This was about the culture that surrounds people having children only because they feel it is the next logical step by society’s standards - about the parents I have met who GENUINELY dislike being parents and would rather not have had children, had they not felt like it was their obligation to. The ‘wine mom’ culture of women who shouldn’t have been parents laughing bitterly over their third glass of Chardonnay and telling you ‘Don’t do it, your life will be over!’ with absolute sincerity and trying to mask it as a joke.

But, you know, reading comprehension is overrated when instead you can be a belittling dick on a nearly three year old post. 

Ps. I still think it’s bullshit to say kids ‘ruin your life’. They change it. They turn it upside down. But to actively use the word ‘ruin’ is - bullshit, in my opinion. If you genuinely feel your life was ruined by your children, maybe you are one of the aforementioned individuals who had children out of societal pressure and not because you wanted to have children.

Pps. There’s no ‘mom’ in our family, our son has two fathers) 

[anthropohedron]

I had children because I wanted children (and grandchildren). And yeah, I glossed over you shitting on parents who are doing their best and coping with parenting however they can, including commiserating with other parents, venting to their childless friends, and even having some wine. Every parent hits a low point from time to time. If you and your partner-dad (I don’t mean that to be dismissive; you say two dads, he’s your partner in dadding) haven’t had a low where you needed to vent or escape, congrats, but don’t be so arrogant as to think it won’t happen to you.

Sure, there are people who had kids for the wrong reasons. Some of them turn into great parents, many don’t. There are also people who had kids for all the right reasons and discover that they hate it and regret it. It’s literally impossible to be sure that you’re suited to parenthood, and we’re all making it up as we go. But it’s the height of arrogance to shit on parents for expressing their stress and even their regrets.

Meanwhile, I’m serious about those puppy training pads.

[enjoloras-deactivated20220821]

Dear god, you’re really reaching for that one, buddy!

I never ‘shit on’ anyone. I shit on the overall culture that puts these poor parents into the situation of feeling like children were necessary/the next step.

This entire post was about how we need to remove the stigma surrounding people not wanting children, and instead talk more about how having children shouldn’t ruin your life - and that acting like new parents are going to be doomed to eternal misery is a shitty thing to do and doesn’t help break down those social expectations in any way. 

All I said was ‘Man, society sucks, we should be able to reach a point where children aren’t an expected part of adult life so more people enter into parenthood willingly, as ready as they can be, and most importantly, enthusiastically!’ 

You can’t say I’m arrogant for some imagined slander when you’re literally the one who came onto my post with all this ‘awww, you’re so naive, haha! Check back in a few years!’ bullshit. THAT is arrogant, my friend, and if you can’t recognise how utterly condescending and beside the point that was, that’s on you.

[surfacage]

a lecture

[the-dark-fantastic]

“Soggy croissant” is the best insult.

[1041uuu]

[plaguedoctormemes]