ap lit(erally gonna hang myself)

hey welcome to my blog im not gonna graduate

[krispykrew-blog]

Also I just realized now that there’s a screen adaption of my book? It doesn’t help much now but I watched some of it and its like a ten episode mini series in russian.  But it’s really funny and seeing the scenes played out aligned really well with how silly the book is. Watching the series reminded me of how confused and amused I was while reading the book and just being like “what is going onnnnn”.  But I Still think not even the screen play could capture how truly weird and abstract the book is. Bulgakov wrote it in a way that reality could not portray it and do it justice, it exists best written down.

[krispykrew-blog]

Shoulda Coulda Woulda

I should’ve approached reading my book differently now that I’m looking back on it.  The way I did it was just reading it all the way through in a huge burst. This made it harder to keep track of all the things happening and all the characters it really hurt my brain.  If I had gone with a nice schedule and read the book gradually, I think it would have been a lot better.  Looking back now I’m realizing that this is a book you really have to take your time with, each chapter you read you need some time for it to sink in, so you don’t confuse it with the other chapters. Everything blended together in my mind into such a huge mess that now that I am pretty far in the writing process I’m realizing it would have been easier if I took my time with the book instead of reading it all at once.

[krispykrew-blog]

I think no matter how we did this project i still would have been a mess because that’s just who i am as a person aint nothin we can do about that. It took a lot to work through everything but honestly once you get started it isnt something that is really difficult you just have to stay on top of it. The one month thing seemed okay at first and then we would learn how to do one part each day and keep moving on really fast but to do one part you had to be finished with the others and i just fell more and more behind and it was not good. If we had three months I probably would have been the same tho.

My process with writing the whole thing was write a sentence and then get overwhelmed and not look at it for three days and then try and write a sentence again, you can see how this may not ave been the best way to approach this and how it made things more difficult for me down the road.

For some reason the writing about the critiques was the hardest part because you had to write about someone writing about the book the author was writing and it just messed with my head.  there were so many different parts to the project the hardest part as keeping track of all of them and figuring out how they were all different from each other so that I didn’t say the same thing over and over again.

[krispykrew-blog]

Im worried this criticism that I have is talking more about the author than the book and I don’t know how to connect it. They are talking about how one character in the book is the authors way to cope with what is happening to him in his life in soviet russia and all that, and I don’t really agree with that. But if that is my opposing source is that okay? Because I don’t know if it’s more a question about the book or a question about the author. I agree that the book itself is a protest against soviet russia, but I don’t think the characters helped Bulgakov to get through all the issues in his life. He didn’t even finish the book and theres no proof that they helped him. I’m trying to figure out how to loop this back in a way to talk about the book rather than the authors personal life. But his personal life is kind of relevant to the book, so idk where I’m gonna go. I think I’m just gonna keep writing about it and see where it goes and then if it doesn’t work it doesn’t work. Write to find out what we think right haha kill me

[krispykrew-blog]

I was working on my annotations and i found a tv series of my book, The Master and Margarita, from 2005.  The screencaps here kind of capture the whole tone of the book. Which is completely just absurd and why what is happening. The absurdity in the book has a purpose though and contributes to the overall satire and mocking of the soviet union and stalin.  It’s just hard to write about because its so weird and hard to follow because this happens and then this happens I’m having trouble figuring out how to write it so that it makes sense to someone who hasn’t read the book. Because if someone else read my annotations as they are now it would probably just confuse them more so I have to go back and figure out a way to explain them better so they make more sense which is just hjsdkflje frustrating because this book is frustrating and it doesn’t make any sense but whatever i picked it so its my fault but this is crazy and im having a ball of a time just the balls i swear 

[krispykrew-blog]

My good old buddy boy my mans my boy my homie my writers notebook is here for me in Ann Arbor for spring break

[maggieeeeeliz-blog]

The librarian didn’t like us I guess. Oh well we tried.

[krispykrew-blog]

The master and margarita

I wasn't sure what I was getting myself into but boy is it something. What is surprising me the most about this book as I'm reading it is it's actually funny. Purely because of how absurd the situations are and how they are described it is very comical and dramatic. Just in the first few pages two men are going around drinking apple juice and then a weird shadowy figure appears then disappears and then they write a poem about how Jesus wasn't real and then see a man with one "platinum" eye and one green eye coming toward them, and this was all on like the first page and I was so engaged. It's surprising how quickly the author was able to grab my attention which is very hard to do and keep it, especially considering this was written in the 1930s in a stalinistic russian environment. I can see already how many political and moral questions are being brought up just in the first page and I'm excited to see how it comes into play later in the book.

[krispykrew-blog]

The master and margarita

I was looking around a lot for a book and honestly I was having a lot of trouble finding something I would be interested in. I looked on a list of classics or something on good reads and the cover for this looked so gross I was like oh baby this looks spicy. After reading the synopsis and finding out it was about Satan visiting Soviet Union Russia I was like oh this is the one for me I've found her.

[krispykrew-blog]

READ THIS SPICE

Are you a messy bitch??? Do u live for drama???? WELLLLL ladies and gentlemen do I got a read for u. Bel Canto by Anne Patcherr is one of the SAUCIEST books I've ever read. It's about a bunch of rich people at an opera party but it's HIJACKED by terrorists!!! Scare Bleu! But then after like three months they start to like each other. And then there's affairs and death and opera oh my!!! But hey even if u don't live for the drama like me, you'll still probably like this book. Ya see all of drama and intrigue still serves a porpoise and contributes to subtle themes throughout the book. So even if u don't love the drama there is still subtlety and beauty to the book that u can appreciate.

[krispykrew-blog]

Mento poet

I was looking for poets because I don't really read poetry or read at all so I had to dig a lil and I found this lady named Cynthia Cruz and she's pretty chill she has a lot of books out and her poems r really like soft but creepy? I don't even know how to describe it they make me think of smoke, like when I'm readin em I can like visualize just some candle smoke or something in the air, that's what her poems feel like and I'm really diggin it. Idk if I'm gonna do her for sure because I haven't looked at many other poets but she's a cool lady

[krispykrew-blog]

I BEL CAN'T (o)

Sooooo bel canto the title translates to beautiful song, and I think that Anne patchett really embodies this throughout the whole thing. Her writing is in a sense almost lyrical, i kept reading certain sentences over again because they just sounded pretty. Also the beautiful song thing comes into play because the thing about a song is that it is a sliver of beauty that only lasts like three or so minutes, the characters in the book themselves are put into this hostage situation which they know will end eventually very badly but while they are still in it they start to live life in a heightened way, a way that is more passionate and condensed than normal life. But that beauty and love they find in each other is eventually cut off, just like a song. Beautiful but it doesn't last forever, and maybe that it can only be experienced for a short time makes it seem even more beautiful.

[krispykrew-blog]

Elka has permission to dance whenever she wants as a form of stress relief, or do whatever she needs as a form of outlet to remain sane, like scream.

[krispykrew-blog]

extremely extreme yo

OVerall it’s a pretty okay book. like it’s alright. The switching between characters and viewpoints confused me a lot until the very end when it was explained, but it was a good aha moment y know. What i like about the book is how it emphasized the little connections that overlap all of us, and how you might not even know how your life is inexplicably connected to another persons. It makes you think about like the map of your life and all the little interactions snad stuff you’ve had with other people and how your life ebbs and flows into anothers. Book had me a little messed up as you can see. But overall good good. Some frustrations with the characters and things i didn’t like . but mostly good.

[krispykrew-blog]

#intangible

so there’s like a common theme i’ve noticed in this book right here right here, a lot of things that the book focuses on have to do with intangible things, like stuff you can’t see or touch.  I thought about this when I read the part where his grandparents are talking about how they mark off sections of their apartment to be “Nothing Places”.  And how eventually they came into conflict between what was something and what was nothing.  They wanted a place where they could fade away into nothing and stop existing, where they could become something intangible.  Because he no longer spoke, almost everything they had all their agreements, their little rules, their feelings for one another were left unsaid. Left to be something that neither of them could really be sure was there, intangible. Every feeling and thought people have towards one another starts out as something that is intangible to anyone else, unless we choose to act or speak on that feeling which brings it about in a physical sense and makes it tangible to others.  Oskar’s mom at one point tells him that she cries all the time, and he is skeptical of if she is really sad because she keeps it to herself and he doesn’t physically see the effects of the sadness on her. He seems to be accusing her of not actually being upset about his dad because her feelings remain hidden and intangible to him.  Now i am rambling and i’ve lost the main point of what i was talking about. but theres lots of intangibles.

[krispykrew-blog]

yo why for heck is oskar like

i don’t know if anyone else is gonna pick up what im bout to lay down but... oskar is lowkey like racist and sexist? im sorry i just like why. There’s a couple of parts where he’s like blatantly admitting he sexist or racist? Like he just has these subtle undertones of this in his manner and speaking. And like did the author do that on purpose? Is the author just slightly sexist and racist? Am i reading too much into this?  let me lay down some examples for ya. 

EX. 1 “There was a lot of stuff that made me panicky, like suspension bridges, germs, airplanes, fireworks, Arab people on the subway (even though I’m not racist), Arab people in restaurants and coffee shops and other public places, scaffolding, sewers, and subway grates, bags without owners, shoes, people with mustaches, smoke, knots, tall building, turbans” (36) 

okay i guess it’s given that he feels like this cuz of the whole 9/11 deal but that was one person. It doesn’t speak for the whole, and the kind of attitude that he shows here is a common attitude that people today have, like they’re legitimately scared of middle eastern people because of this stereotype that comes from 9/11. It’s wrong and i know oskar is nine but c’mon, like really? he’s like, “Im not racist but like im afraid of all arab people.” Like thats still racist bud.  there’s also a part where he’s talking about being able to see the dots on a map in a different way if you squint your eyes, but he refers to it by saying  “if you were extremely Chinese” like ???? okay thats... okay bye

EX.2 “I walked over to the art supply store, and I asked the woman at the door if I could speak to the manager, which is something Dad used to do when he had an important question. ‘What can I do for you’ she asked. ‘I need the manager,’ I said. She said, ‘I know. What can I do for you?’ ‘You’re incredibly beautiful,’ I told her, because she was fat, so I thought it would be an especially nice compliment, and also make her like me again, even though I was sexist. ‘Thanks,’ she said. I told her, “You could be a movie star.’”

okay once again, he acknowledges that what he’s doing isn’t really good, he says himself that he’s sexist. BUT THEen he just keeps on going???LIke this is rude too, he’s just complimenting her because he thinks it will make her want to help him not because he believes it’s true. I just i don’t know how to feel about this, there’s another part later on where he’s also remarking on the beauty of Abby Black and even asks her if he can kiss her.  Like yes he’s nine, yes he’s going through a lot, and he’s got a lot of other stuff going on, but you still can’t deny these like subtly racist and sexist overtones in him. 

[jonconley-aplang-blog]

Stereotypes

- Prior to having a conversation with my group, I believed that stereotypes are barriers that only affect those who choose to base their understanding of a race on these prejudices. I believed this even though I knew that my race is stereotyped the most. While stereotypes can / do have an affect on the lives of those who are stereotyped, I believe that those who perpetuate these stereotypes suffer the most, not those who they refer to as “minorities”. When you have a closed mind to a person’s true identity because of preconceived notions, you are putting yourself at a disadvantage. I believe that stereotypes only begin to affect those who are stereotyped, when they choose to live up to their stereotypes purposely. I think that being over conscious of what other people think of you is a mistake and you should have enough integrity to be yourself, no matter what that is.

- During my conversation with my group I didn’t gain any insight because there was a general consensus that stereotypes are bad. Although, I did realize that no one really wants to talk about stereotypes. Stereotypes are an oversimplified and generalized understandings about a group of people. These are made to make us feel comfortable with those who we don’t know. I believe that when we talk about how these stereotypes may not be true, we try to cope because we are uncomfortable. I found that people made jokes when talking about stereotypes that are serious, like the stereotype that unarmed whites are shot less by police than unarmed blacks (a fact not a stereotype). This was us trying to cope with an uncomfortable reality. There’s no point in talking about a serious topic if we want to continue to feel comfortable. I also realized that high school students living in an America where there is relative equality for all races and going to a school as diverse as Avondale, may not be ready to talk about this topic.

- After having a conversation with my group, I only felt stronger about my stances on stereotypes. Stereotypes only put those who choose to believe them at a disadvantage. No one should purposely play into a stereotype.

[krispykrew-blog]

You said that stereotypes put the people who believe them at a disadvantage more than the people who are victims of the stereotype. I see how believing false information about someone and being ignorant in this way puts someone at a huge disadvantage in the world, however I don’t think this is a greater disadvantage than the people who the stereotype is based off of suffer. A stereotype in a way marks that whole group of people, even if it isn’t true for that person. So say even if a person didn’t conform to that stereotype or choose to follow it, everywhere they go they’ll still hear that stereotype about them and be challenged and joked about by those who believe the stereotype. Constantly having to hear jokes and lies about oneself that aren’t true is damaging to an individual. I believe it’s harder to show that a stereotype doesn’t apply to you and live life in general knowing that you will have to again and again deal with the way these people think about you than it is for the people who are perpetuated said stereotypes.