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@americangeishagirl yep that definitely works as you found out this afternoon! 😜😘

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dothisforme

So you want to talk dirty but you have no clue what to say?

Dirty talk is an awesome way to explore your fantasies in a safe environment, but it can also be a daunting task if you’re not used to expressing your sexuality in such an explicit way.

What do you say? How do you say it? And how do you know he’ll like it?

Diclaimer: the following advice reflects our kinks and likes but the principles can be used for any fantasy you want to talk dirty about. We’re very much into hotwifing both of us. Basically he enjoys to watch me being fucked by a hung guy. He’s not into humiliation or being put down, but he do like to hear that another man can give me just as much pleasure as him, sometimes even more. For me, I enjoy walking that fine line where he’s a mix of horny and jealous. I want him to be horny thinking of me cumming over and over again, but I also love to know that it does sting a little bit when I tell him that a bigger dick can turn me into an obedient little slut and make me cum instantly.

Some safety rules.

First thing first. We don’t want your dirty talk to turn into a stupid argument, so let’s get some safety rules down first.

• Talk about what he like and doesn’t like beforehand. What I’m writing in this post is based on our likes and kinks, and they are not universal guidelines. You should always talk to your husband and find out exactly what it is he would love to hear from you. It’s important to keep this conversation non-sexual, so you get an honest answer, not a horny answer.

• What is said in dirty talk might not reflect real life. This goes both ways. Dirty talk is a great way to explore fantasies and boundaries, but not everything said when you’re raging horny is valid when you’re not. If something is said that surprises you, talk about it after. And remember, you’re going make him REALLY horny, so he might express fantasies or thoughts that is just that - fantasies and thoughts, and not necessarily something he wants to act on. In the same way you need to be clear about how you’re also just exploring your own fantasies as well as his, and might say something in the heat of the moment that you don’t necessarily mean or want to act out in real life.

• This is dirty talk, not a lie detector test. You’re allowed to exaggerate to increase his enjoyment, but I strongly advise you to reveal the truth after he’s had his orgasm so you won’t create a distorted image in his head.

What dirty talking is not

Dirty talking is not overthinking how to phrase the perfect sentence. In fact, once you start articulating your husband’s fantasies, I guarantuee he will be so horny he couldn’t care less how well you phrase it. Just the fact that you’re talking about his fantasies means that he’s too busy trying to keep his orgasm back to even care. Just relax and say something. Anything.

Don’t rush it

The goal with dirty talking is of course to make your husband have an amazing orgasm, but do not rush it!

I’ll dare say that for your husband the process and the talk itself is way more exciting than his orgasm. So take your time and let him enjoy and simmer in it.

Don’t worry about repeating yourself

You might be thinking “but I already told him that story 3 times, I can’t think of something new”. Don’t worry about that, just tell it again. Trust me.

And now…. Without further ado here are my secret dirty talking methods that’ll make your husband lose his mind.

And then what

I find that the biggest obstacle in dirty talking is how to start it. That first thing you break the ice with. It can feel a bit awkward at first, but you’ll quickly get the hang of it. I’m a big fan of something I call the and then what technique. Basically you just start with a rather innocent question or statement and then evolve into the next natural thing that would happen. So you say something, and then pretend someone asks you “and then what” and then you answer that question.

So let’s pretend for a second you’re on top of your man, riding him cowgirl style and you want to spice it up a little.

Simply starting with a “you like the way I fuck you?” Is enough to break that awkward ice. He’ll answer yes of course. And then what? “then imagine how Mark (using names of actual guys you know works amazingly) would feel if I fucked him like this”

And then what?

“I would bounce up and down his cock just like this. He’ll get to feel how tight your wife’s pussy is”

And then what?

“then I want him to….”

You get it.

Reliving the past

My husband is very much into hearing stories about guys I used to fuck so this one is his favorite type of dirty talk. The way it goes is when I give him a handjob, blowjob or even ride him, I would say something like “you like the way I stroke your dick?” (asking if he likes it is always a great way to break the ice and initiate dirty talk without feeling awkward). This always gets me a very enthustiastic “YES!” to which I answer something like “this is exactly how I used to stroke [name of guy I used to fuck]’s cock…” (pause for dramatic effect) “except… His was a lot bigger than yours”. This line alone is usually enough to almost bring him over the edge, and if not it’s a great way to go into more details - how did it feel to stroke a much bigger dick, would you do it again, perhaps the guy used to get so horny that he would fuck you before you could finish the handjob, etc. Details, details, details, I can’t stress it enough.

Fair warning: not everyone is into hearing about your past! Make sure your husband is into that before springing this on him.

The commentator

This one is super easy because you don’t feel like you’re talking dirty, you’re just saying what’s on your mind. So the way it works is to watch porn with your man and simply make comments about the movie paying. Particularly about the guy and what you like about him. Compliment his dick, go into details about what you like about him, think out loud like “I really wish I could get fucked like that one day” / “look how big his dick is. He would make me cum so fast with that”

If you’ve fucked someone who reminds you of the guy, by all means tell your husband about it. Watching a porn with a guy who’s fucking some girl senseless and hearing your wife drop the bomb that the guy is the exact same size as some dude she dated in college is a sure way to make your husband look at the porn and all he will see is you being fucked right there on the screen. Very hot for both of you.

The yes ladder

This is a really simple but very effective technique that is easy for new dirty talkers and is guarantueed to drive him crazy.

In a nutshell what you do is ask him some questions that all leads to a yes. With each question the intensity in what you’re asking increases. There’s something crazy hot about this almost confessional way of talking dirty and being “forced to admit” your deepest fantasies. This is a great way to get yourself going, and to test out boundaries.

Optional: let him know ahead of time that you’re going to ask him questions and if he says no just once, he don’t get to cum. See what he’s willing to say yes to - just remember these are forced and horny yesses expressing what he likes in the heat of the moment. They don’t necessarily count in real life.

Example of a yes ladder.

“you like this huh”

“would you like it if i did this to another guy?”

“would you let me pick any guy i want?”

“what if i want a guy who’s bigger than you, would you allow that?”

“do you want him to fuck me hard?”

“what if he makes me cum really hard, can you handle that?”

“what if he makes me scream out his name, can you still handle it?”

“can I fuck him right here in our bed?”

“would you allow me to fuck someone I’ve dated before?”

“even if he really knows how to fuck me good?”

“what if I want him to fuck me while you wait in the other room, will you do that?”

You get it, just continue like this. Make the questions increasingly more provocative and test his boundaries, maybe even cross them if you know he can handle it.

The O-bomb

This method works extremely well if you’ve been teasing and playing with him for a while, keeping him right on the edge and he’s SO close now that you can make him cum any second.

All there is to it is asking him “do you want to cum?” he’ll answer yes almost pleading. And that’s when you drop the O-bomb. The O-bomb is some of the blue thought you put into his head and force him to cum to before he can even react.

For example: he just said yes he wants to cum. You then say “good. I want you to cum while you think of me cumming all over (name)’s big dick” and then you simply force him to cum before he even gets a chance to react. As he’s cumming you keep feeding him the thought over and over until he’s done. “yes, cum while you imagine how he makes me scream” etc.

The story

My personal favorite. One thing is to talk about imaginary stuff that could maybe some day happen. Another is to talk about stuff that actually already happened simply by telling him a story about some incredible hot sex you’ve had, either because the circumstances where hot, because the guy knew what he was doing and fucked your brains out or the guy happened to be seriously hung.

This is also super simple for you because you dont have to make anything up, you simply just tell what happened and describe the situation.

Don’t worry about elaborate descriptions or anything. Trust me he’ll ask you to elaborate when he hears something he likes. Just describe what happened and how it felt for you. Especially the “how it felt” part is very important.

The talk

Now in the safety rules i told you to talk about what he likes and dislikes without touching him so his arousal won’t reflect his answers. This time you do the exact opposite. Simply have a conversation about what he likes while slowly touching his dick. There’s something really hot about just talking while casually stroking him. And you’ll be able to measure his response simply by the way his dick throbs, which is incredibly hot.

How to start it: just casually ask him a question about his likes and as he answers you slowly start touching him while asking him more questions.

The close your eyes and imagine

Sometimes it can be a lot easier if your husband can’t see you when you talk dirty.

Example:

“close your eyes. Do you like my hands on. Your dick? Now imagine i was doing this to another guy. Stroking his big dick just like this. I would be so turned on knowing it isn’t you. My pussy would want to feel him inside me. Imagine how he would push me down and fuck me. Imagine how i would gasp when he starts to stretch me. How I would scream when he goes deeper than you.”

Do you see how the above also make use of the and then what technique to tell the next part of the story?

Putting it all together

Now, I know reading about it and actually doing it is two very different things. When you’re first starting out I actually advice you to plan out your dirty talking. This might not be as sexy and spontaneous, but while you’re still getting the hang of it it’s nice to be a little prepared so you don’t run out of things to say. I would also advice you to start off doing it while giving a handjob, as you will have a much easier time focusing on what to say than if you were giving a blowjob or having sex.

Let’s break the ice with an innocent “do you like the way it feels when I stroke your cock?”

When he says yes I would then say something like “good…. Now close your eyes” wait for him to do it.

Then: “would you like it if I did this to another man?” - “yes”

Then: “you know, [name of ex / bull / fantasy guy] used to love when I stroked his dick. Of course his was a lot bigger than yours, I could barely close my hand around it”

Then: “do you like that, thinking about how I used to stroke his big cock?” - “yes”

Then: “having that big cock in my hands always made me feel so tiny and horny”

Then: “do you want me to show you how I used to suck him?” - “yes”. Then put all your effort into giving the best head you have ever given.

Then: “mmh… Can you imagine how good his cock must have felt in my mouth? I used to suck him just like that until he came in my mouth”.

By now he should be getting pretty close, so it’s time put on the finale. Ask him “do you want to cum?” - “yes”. Start stroking him faster.

“tell me…” - make him say that he wants to cum.

“I want you to cum while you think of me getting fucked by [name]. He would always make me cum so hard. Imagine how I used to scream his name” - if you really want to go all out you could start moaning the name of this other guy, whether that’s your bull, an old fling, your husband’s friend or who ever you like to fantasize about.

Do you see how easy it flows from do you like it, to imagine it’s someone else, to describing how you used to do or would do it on someone else?

With time it will come naturally and you won’t have to plan ahead, but to begin with it’s nice to have an idea of how you want to start it, how you want to end it and how you bridge that gap.

There you have it. My secrets to driving your husband wild. Now go… Make him lose it.

21stcenturyhotwife

Hotwifing is growing in popularity. 58% of men secretly admit they would like to share their wives. Imagine that! Half the men you know are into that and many of yours girlfriends are likely already doing it. A Hotwife is a married woman with permission to play but she makes the rules. Her husband must remain faithful. This lifestyle is a huge turn-on for many men. It’s not about jealousy and bi-curiosity. It’s about control. It’s about sharing the woman he loves, getting off on her enjoying other men, her being a personal porn star. Men who are into this kink tend to be hardworking, intelligent leaders. Alpha males, they are used to being boss with a take-charge personality and this lifestyle puts the control in the Hotwife’s hands. The more fun the hotwife has, the more her husband enjoys it.

It started for me when I found Hotwife porn on my hubby’s computer. I was shocked, offended. I thought he wanted to fuck other women. This was far from the truth. It took some time to realize he wanted to share me. It turned him on and he did not know how to tell me. Would I think he wanted to cheat if I did it? Would I think he’s bi? These are fears he had and it took some time for me to realize it was all about him being turned on by me being naughty and in control. It was all about me and him finding me attractive. Me being naughty makes him want me more. It’s brought us so much closer.

Most marriages get very boring in the bedroom. Hotwifing spices it up 100x. It’s important to focus on the physical aspect of sex with your dates and the emotional connection with sex with your hubby. The extra sex with other men isn’t the main focus, ITS THE RECLAIMING SEX WITH YOUR HUBBY. You just enjoyed a great, liberating experience and hubby gets you in the end every time. You’re going to be having a lot more sex and you will find yourself saying “can you do what X did to me?”.

Some of my list below ventures more on your hubby being more submissive. Others less so. If your hubby does not want to do the extra submissive ones, that’s ok. You might not either. It’s important to be respectful to hubby. Your date should always be respectful if your hubby is there for the encounter. He should never ridicule your hubby. That will ruin the experience. Depending on your relationship, you may say more submissive things like “what do you want him to do to me” or “is this what you wanted to see?”, or more dominant things like “watch how good he fucks me”, or engaging in more dominant activities that you will find below. Many couples are afraid to try the light dominant acts, but you might be surprised how much you’re both into it once you do.

Here are some tips, challenges, and dares!

Starting out:

1. Point out men you’d like to fuck. Tease the idea.

2. Tell your husband you know men who want to fuck you.

3. Flirt with men, even in front of your husband. Make it obvious you’re flirting. Even say something like “you and I should get together for drinks sometime. This is my hubby but he’s working tomorrow. How about we get together then?”

4. Tell men you’re married and need extra cock. A lot of men will fuck you harder knowing you’re married.

5. Talk about your exes. Especially sex with them.

6. Tell your husband you want to fuck other men during sex.

7. Tell your husband you won’t fuck him again until you fuck someone else.

8. During sex, make him admit you deserve more cock. Not just from him, but you deserve to be well fucked by other men, often.

9. Tell your husband of fun you’ve had with men while in bed. Be honest and tell him of occasions you’ve never told him. He WILL be turned on. I told mine of some past infidelity from years back and he was turned on.

10. Tell your husband you want to fuck your ex (and do it)

11. Tell your husband you want to feel another man fill your pussy with cum.

12. During foreplay, tell your husband you want to leave to go fuck someone you know. Have your husband take a pic of you to send to him right then.

13. Go to a hotel bar with your husband and flirt with guys. Try to get invited to his room.

14. Dance with guys and grind on them in front of your husband.

15. Have your husband tell a guy you’ve been flirting with that he wants him to fuck you.

16. Have drinks with your husband and a guy you want to fuck and tell the guy how you want to be fucked. Touch him, get close to him, guide his hands.

17. Get a guy’s number that you met with your hubby and secretly sext him in front of your hubby. Pro tip: Use the message app Kik.

18. Go on a girls night out and go home with a guy. Best if you have single friends. Make sure to dress slutty and have your husband watch you get ready. He’s hoping it turns into a late night.

19. Carry condoms in your purse and make sure your husband knows.

20. Sext other men and show your husband.

21. Have your husband take pics of you in your underwear for you to send to men.

22. Make a dating profile (Ashley Madison, Tinder, etc). This is a must do. Show hubby the guys you want to fuck.

23. Have your husband pay for lingerie your lover will enjoy. Say things like “Do you think he’d like to fuck me in this?”

24. Have your husband help you get ready for a solo date. Make sure to trim very well. Very little or no hair. Clean yet sooooo dirty :p

25. Go out and send updates and pics. Start clothed at a bar or restaurant with his hand on your hips or butt. Your hand on his crotch, etc. First kiss.

26. Go to his place and have your date send a pic of you bent over in your underwear. If it’s new underwear say something like “recognize the new panties you bought me? I found someone who will be the first to make them wet”

27. Send pics of his hand on your panties, rubbing your crotch. Suggestive pics. Don’t go full nude. Tease him.

28. Send pics of his face in your pussy.

28. Send a selfie with his dick in your mouth (very hot)

29. The pics stop as your hubby knows you are getting fucked.

30. Alternative: Live video or speakerphone your husband while you get fucked. Moan loud and beg for cock. Make sure to audibly tell your lover you are married and need to be fucked harder than your husband fucks you.

31. If you choose to send pics of the action, use low light. Tease him with it.

32. If no condom, scream for him to cum in your pussy.

33. If using a condom, use a new one each time you fuck and bring them all home to show your husband.

34. Tell your lover to make your panties soaking wet so you can show your husband.

35. Play with the idea of having your hubby eat your pussy after your date or kiss you after a blowjob. You might not think it, but when in the act both tend to find it very hot.

36. BONUS: Let your lover cum in your pussy and put your panties on immediately. Go home, lay on the bed, and spread your legs showing your husband your cum soaked panties.

37. Tell your husband every detail. You decide if your husband deserves a blow job, hand job, let him fuck you, or make him jerk off.

38. Make your husband use a condom to fuck you. Or don’t. Make him be your sloppy seconds.

39. MAKE HIM WATCH: It’s not going to be easy to find a guy who is okay with hubby watching. This is often best done if it’s someone you have been fucking so you and your lover are both comfortable. The three hottest moments of the first encounter hubby sees is watch your date slowly undress you, watching his cock enter you for the first time, and cum dripping out of you.

40. Introduce your lover: “Hubby, this is Mark. He knows how to fuck me and he’s going to show you how I like it.” Or “what do you want him to do to me?”

41. Have him sit outside the bedroom door and listen “Sorry, you can’t watch but we’ll let you listen”. Then make it loud!

42. Have hubby hold you while you get fucked.

43. Have your husband pull aside your panties while your lover eats your pussy.

44. Have your husband take off your panties for your lover.

45. Alternative: Make sure your panties are wet and put them on your husband’s head.

46. Or fuck with your panties on so they are wet and cum soaked. Visually, women look hot fucking with the panties pulled aside. Plus, you’ll get more cum in them for later tips.

47. Ride your lover’s cock so your hubby can see from behind. Great in video too.

48. Tell your husband he can’t touch himself. BONUS: strap him to a chair.

49. Look in your husband’s eyes as you’re fucked from behind.

50. Moan loud. Tell him how good you’re being fucked.

51. Wear your wedding ring and have your lover cum on it.

52. BONUS: Have your lover do something to you that your husband doesn’t: “Fuck my ass”, etc.

53. Have your hubby rent a hotel room and send him out for drinks when you have a “guest”. He’ll come back to you getting fucked.

***Other adventures:

54. Fuck several men. Make some more frequent but keep options. Fuck other men AT LEAST once a week. Your hubby will want to fuck you immediately, so be prepared for lots of sex.

55. Have your husband drive you to your lovers house.

56. Fuck your lover all night and call your husband to pick you up in the morning only to fuck your lover once more while he waits.

57. Kiss your lover as you leave and tell him you can’t wait to fuck again.

58. Tell your husband to thank your lover for fucking you.

59. Have your husband wait outside your lovers house while you fuck.

60. Tell your hubby to undress you for your lover.

61. Fuck your lover at home and leave your panties, a condom, or other memento on his side of the bed.

62. Fuck your lover on your wedding anniversary. Bonus if you’re wearing bridal lingerie. I planned this for a weekend getaway. My husband watched as I wore white panties that said “bride” on the back and white leggings for three rounds of fucking in our hotel room.

62. Fuck your lover on your husband’s side of the bed while he’s at work. Send pics and video.

63. Suck your lover’s cock and send a pic of the cum in your mouth to your husband.

64. Have your husband rent a room for you and your lover for the weekend. Count the number of times you cum and tell hubby. Must send pics!

65. Tell your husband he can’t fuck you until you’ve fucked X number of guys or X number of times.

66. Let your lover do things to you that you don’t do with your husband (cum in your ass, threesome with two guys). All the reason for private sessions without hubby.

67. Speaking of 3somes. Try two guys at once.

68. Wear panties with slutty messages (Return to Husband Full, Make a Mess My Hubby Will Clean It Up, Fuck Me Harder Than My Husband). Show this to men you’re flirting with in front of your hubby: Unzip and show message “what do you think of these?” I have some that say “my hubby won’t mind” at the top of the butt that I let guys see when in bars or a dance club.

***ADVANCED:

69. BIG BONUS AND VERY HOT. HE DOESN’T KNOW IT YET BUT THIS IS A BIG TURNON: When you come home with your panties full of cum, take them off, put on something sexy, and put the creamy panties on his head so your lover’s cum drips on him. Just do it. Nothing tells him you got well fucked like cum in your panties. VERY HOT.

70. Or…lay him on the ground while wearing the panties and rub your crotch on his face. Very very hot. He might just eat your pussy. I’m getting wet thinking about it.

71. Or…if using condoms, empty them in your panties and put them on his head.

72. When doing this, rub his cock and tell him how good you got fucked and tell him he needs to see and feel how good the cum was that was inside you. Tell him to feel your well used pussy.

73. When fucking in front of your hubby, make him wear your panties.

74. Blow your lover and swallow, but leave some on your lips. Tongue kiss your hubby.

***If your hubby REALLY deserves to be teased. You are in control and he WILL do what you say.

74. If your husband is watching, tell your lover to make a mess of your pussy because your husband will clean it up. Then sit on him when you’re done and let it leak all over him. His legs, chest, even his face.

75. BONUS: make him eat your pussy whether or not you used condoms. If you came home from a date, tell hubby to pull your panties aside and eat your pussy, especially if he cheated with X. Tell him how good you got fucked. Just tell him to do it and he will do it. YOU MAKE THE RULES.

76. Make a list of consequences. Checked a girl out: You get a Tinder date. Watched porn: you’re free to be a porn star with another man for the day. Flirted with a girl: You fuck five guys. One nighters, all weekend, your ex, someone you both know. Anyone you want and you make the rules. Even if he has to fly you somewhere to fuck someone all week. Updates and pics are required.

77. Spanking.

***Clearly there a humiliation factor that you both will get off to. Men knowing they are fucking his wife, you fucking men you both know. Maybe a friend knowing. Spanking (naughty boys deserve it). Your lover’s cum on hubby. Your lovers being told to show hubby how you like it. Have fun with this. It will make the experience stronger.

78. The hotwife 69. Get in the 69 position with your hubby but have your lover fuck you so your hubby has a great view just inches from your pussy.

79. ADVANCED: Strap-on play.

80. Wear a Hotwife anklet. Guaranteed to get attention of men in the know.

81. Have a friend spank your hubby. I have a friend who is a bit kinky and knows about our lifestyle. She felt my hubby needed punishment for flirting with a mutual friend years ago. I brought a guy home on girls night and she spanked my hubby, with my lovers belt, as I was getting fucked by my lover. I came out with the belt and handed it to her. After a while I came out with my soaking wet panties for him to wear and she sparked him. Of course you need a friend you can trust for this one.

***This Hotwife activity has brought us closer. We are more open sexually and satisfied. After all, I get many times more sex than ever. Sex with my husband is frequent. HAVE FUN!

hotwife-confessions

More original hotwife confessions here: Hotwife Confessions Our own pics here: Becoming Hotwife

Guilty

Yes I do!!

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mybeautifuldemurewife

Yess

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hwwendy

I wish I lived like this 20 years ago versus 4. If I was open to my husband’s fantasies of me hotwifing from the start ….. Wow!! Vanilla wives if you read my post and your hubby wants to open your sex life as as a ViXen Hotwive, read up on it and say yes! Finally saying yes was the best decision of my life. I’m 20 pounds lighter from fitness and eating right, less stress, more smiles, more orgasms, a new and sexy wardrobe, goodbye to frumpy, and hello to a sexy me. My Stag husband adores me, our sex is amazing, sex with my Bulls is fantastic, not weird, and I have Never felt happier, more fulfilled and adored. Get rid of the shitty drama in your life, your gossiping and catty girlfriends, those woe is me comments from your friends in sexless and loveless marriages and become your hubby’s ViXen. Oh, and get ready for some great vacations. What a plus! All you great Want to be Stags, show them my post. But if you feel in any way jealous if your wife plays, don’t. That simple. 💞🦊🦌🐂

two2explore

@flipflopwife Time to let the Vixen out.

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Hotwife Lifestyle - Understanding Our Man’s Hotwife Fantasy and How to Use That to Our Advantage

The fantasy of having a “Hotwife” is growing, in fact, research shows it is growing at a higher rate than a good majority of the other lifestyle alternatives, including the old staple of “swinging” and the modern “open relationship”. Why is it that a fantasy that revolves around only one part of a relationship – the woman – going out and finding pleasure from another man more intriguing to an increasing number of men than going out and “getting some” for himself?

Basic psychology tells us that men are highly competitive creatures. They have a drive to compete with other males of the species for the best mate – this isn’t so much different than what happens in the animal kingdom. Most men have an innate drive to compete with other men when it comes to the “best mate” or the “most attractive woman”. With this being said, one of the reservations of most women who find out about their husband or partner’s Hotwife fantasy is that he is somehow “weaker” than the rest because he wants to give up his position as your only partner. Is this really true, though? Could the truth lie somewhere within today’s man’s loss of natural competition in everyday life, and a desire to maintain a level of competition after marriage or “monogamy”? Is this weakness, or rather the ultimate confidence?

Cuckholding aside, because this aspect of the fantasy requires a bit more in terms of a “woman led” relationship, and a bit more from the man in terms of a desire for mental sadomasochism, a good majority of men enjoy the idea that they have been able to “capture” the best mate and even when she’s out having amazing physical and emotional experiences with men who may have qualities that actually supersede their own – a better body, a larger cock, youth, more prowess in bed – their woman actually WANTS to come back to them at the end of the night. While most Hotwife-Husbands do get some level of turn-on from the jealousy and the possibility that their Hotwife may actually be enjoying their dates more than they enjoy being “at home”, the overwhelming desire is the competition and the “win” in terms of having a wife who chooses them again and again even after being allowed to go out and have other men.

As Hotwives, we may be the focus of the fantasy, but there is that deeper and more psychological desire of a man who, even after committing to one woman, is able to compete with other males sexually. This is why the desire for “reclaiming” a Hotwife after a date is so strong – it’s actually been scientifically proven that men who are able to reclaim a partner after she has been with someone else have an increase in testosterone levels, which means stronger desire, more powerful erections, longer lasting erections, and an overall stronger sex drive. So, what does this mean for us as Hotwives?

He Enjoys the Jealousy, Go with It

As women we’ve learned that inducing some jealousy can actually be a good thing when it comes to dating – before we’ve found our “person”. We use our female prowess to keep the men who we are seeing guessing…why? Because they seem more interested in us when it seems as though we may not be 100% there. So, if this works in the dating world, why wouldn’t it work once we’re married? In contrast, women typically don’t respond as well, or in the same way to jealousy – we tend to worry, question, and sometimes shut down if we feel that he might be “just not that into us”. Naturally, because of our own feelings on the matter, we tend to avoid making our men jealous once we’ve committed to them, because we, ourselves don’t want to feel as though we’re in constant competition with other, more attractive, sexier, younger, etc., women. Why would we do something to the man that we love that we, ourselves, would hate?

For men, though, and especially those with Hotwife fantasies, jealousy is a big component and tool for us to keep our men hot and bothered. Sometimes just the mere mention of being flirted with by that cute guy at our favorite restaurant, or our interest in the sexy personal trainer at the gym is enough to send our men into a sexual frenzy. It doesn’t take a lot to feed the fantasy. It’s not ALL about dates and recounting how well we got worked over in the bedroom (and how much we loved it), though that is the ultimate turn on for our men, it’s also about the little things – the mention of our interest in someone else, the sexy messages that we send to potential lovers or Bulls, the “tease” of how much we loved what our last Bull did for us and how much we’re looking forward to doing it again. Remember, this ignites the “competition” element of things, which is natural for men.

The More You Enjoy it, the More He Enjoys it

You may be thinking, “But I’m doing it for him, I’m not doing it for myself” (a common theme by A LOT of Hotwives), but in reality, our men WANT us to enjoy our encounters. They want to hear about what this “other guy” did for or to is that sent us over the edge, and yes, they want to hear what we liked better about the “other guy”. I know it seems crazy, because we don’t want to imagine our men, even if we did allow them to be with other women, thinking that their “others” were better, sexier, hotter or had something that we don’t. That’s because we don’t have that “competition drive” like our men do.

Let’s face it, despite what our men tell us – “It’s all about your pleasure” or “I don’t get anything out of it unless you’re enjoying it, because I love you so much” – this isn’t some ultimate “unselfish” thing our men are doing for us. These things come out of their mouths, but what they are really saying is “I want to know that you came three times while he was fucking you, and you STILL want to come home to me”. It’s their kink, and we have to understand it.

So, if you’ve actually taken the step into the world of Hotwifing, you’re going to have to learn how to properly tease your man into believing that, just maybe, your Bull was better than him in some ways. Whenever you think “But I’m only doing it for him”, follow that us with “I’m doing it for him and he WANTS to know that I absolutely enjoyed it”. Find some aspect of your encounter that was mind-blowing, and recount, in great detail exactly what it was that sent you over the edge. This may require a little bit of embellishment, and that’s OKAY…trust me…embellishment is your friend in this situation. Tell your man about your Bull’s amazing cock, how good if felt, how good he tasted, how fantastic he was at oral sex, etc. These are the things that will ramp up that competition streak in your man and make him want to reclaim you with increased vigor and desire.

The More You Want Someone Else, The More Your Man Wants You

Again, you’re playing on the competition and the teasing aspect of things here… The more that you act as if you WANT to be a Hotwife, the more that your husband or partner is going to WANT you. His desire for you is going to skyrocket, his sexual desire for you is going to make it so that he’s ready to chew his own leg off to get you back in bed. I have experienced this firsthand many times…if I am completely honest about an “encounter” and admit to “D” that my Bull was lacking in some way, or I didn’t quite “get there”, he isn’t nearly as turned on as when I tell him about how amazing things were. I don’t like or believe in lying, but I do advocate for being selective and stretching the truth…maybe your lover wasn’t the best at giving oral sex, but maybe he was an amazing kisser, so a good answer would be “he was amazing with his mouth” and leave the rest up for interpretation.

We’re women. We are strong and capable and we are smart. And the truth is, this is a GAME we are playing for and with our husbands/partners, so we need to get our heads into the game. Furthermore, this is an intellectual game, and we need to use our intellects to get to where we want to be. Where do we want to be? We want to have a husband/partner who is absolutely drooling over us, believes we are the ultimate sexual goddess, and in is jealous enough to realize that in order to “compete” they will need to step up their own game in order to “keep” us satisfied – be that with amazing sex, extra romance, other rewards, or all of the above.

Happy Hotwifing!

-S

stagnationhw-deactivated2018121

This is 100% accurate. An excellent account of hotwifing from a woman’s perspective and sums up perfectly why many men are into the fantasy.

stag1018

WOW! You hitt ther nail on the head! This is a very big part of my feelings….