Lady Bathgin

A cold cocktail in a hot bath does a girl all sorts of good.

[ladybathgin]

A Lady Bathgin Special: The Ease On Down

GUYS THE WIZ LIVE IS TONIGHT ON NBC AND IM SO SORRY I DIDNT GET THIS UP SOONER BUT I HAD TO MAKE SURE IT TASTED GOOD.

*DEEP BREATHE*

THE EASE ON DOWN

1 tablespoon ginger and honey simple syrup

half glass of passion fruit juice

dry sparkling white wine

Pour in the simple syrup and the juice, and top off the glass with the sparkling white wine. It’s sweet with a bit of warm, NOW GET YOUR BUTTS TO THE TV AND WATCH THE WIZ! 

[ladybathgin]

GUYS I MADE A THING SORRY I DID IT JUST BEFORE IT STARTED SO YOU COULDN’T DRINK ALONG WITH ME D:

[ladybathgin]

A Lady Bathgin Special: The Ease On Down

GUYS THE WIZ LIVE IS TONIGHT ON NBC AND IM SO SORRY I DIDNT GET THIS UP SOONER BUT I HAD TO MAKE SURE IT TASTED GOOD.

*DEEP BREATHE*

THE EASE ON DOWN

1 tablespoon ginger and honey simple syrup

half glass of passion fruit juice

dry sparkling white wine

Pour in the simple syrup and the juice, and top off the glass with the sparkling white wine. It’s sweet with a bit of warm, NOW GET YOUR BUTTS TO THE TV AND WATCH THE WIZ! 

[ladybathgin]

Hi! Actually I'm curious about the Whiskey Rebellion. I've never heard of it, what happened? Was during the Prohibition? I'm not a fan of whiskey of any sort, but yay history!!

So this is a very quick and dirty run down of my understanding of the Whiskey Rebellion. Yay!

The Whiskey Rebellion has actually NOTHING to do with Prohibition, but everything to do with the American Revolution! Yay!

So America right? No Taxation without Representation. Remember that one, it was one of the points patriots liked to whip out as justification for the Revolution (There were a few reasons but remember that one). Now mind you a lot of Americans were just used to like, NOT paying taxes and smuggling and stuff and took it really personally when Britain started really enforcing taxation *cough* John Hancock*cough*.

ANYWAY so, there was a war right? And after the 1780s, America is all trying to get its shit together and create a government and OOOOOPS the problem with WAR is that it takes a lot of money and America owed a TON of money to various European countries and banks. We were in serious debt and over here you have my man Secretary of the Treasury Alexander Hamilton trying to deal with it while also trying to strengthen the Federal government’s power over the states. (I’m not here to debate if that was good and necessary or the worst evil of American history, that’s just how it was)

Now, no one was going to let him tax people or property, you’d have another revolution on your hands! So we start with an taxing imports, which leads to Hamilton fighting the East Coast smuggling culture with the US Custom House and the creation of the Coast Guard and we start paying off our National Debt. YAY!

 But the imports were taxed to the limit and even JAMES MADISON is like “nah man we can’t tax imports anymore, we have to find another source of revenue.”

But again, you can’t tax people or property, because AMERICA.

BUT…what about Vice Taxes?

Vice taxes are what you place on items that aren’t necessary and are kinda bad, like booze and cigarettes. You can live without that shit. So Alexander Hamilton pushes for a tax on American-produced distilled spirits. Even if you’re in the back woods of Western Pennsylvania with one still, you’re going to get taxed on what you produce. Even JAMES MADISON backed this because hey, rampant alcoholism has always sort of been a problem in America (hence Prohibition).

Seems reasonable, no?

BRO.

Not only are you fucking with like, AN INGRAINED AMERICAN NATIONAL PASTTIME, you are also taxing what is considered the only reasonable way for farmers in the western frontier to get their produce to eastern markets without them spoiling. Like, grain alcohol in barrels was way easier to transport and was more cost effective than transporting grain. ALSO, whiskey was used as a form of currency because money was hard to come by in the west, so you kinda sorta ended up with an Income Tax on a bartering system.

So, farmers in the west felt that not only was that tax against the very “NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION” that the Revolution was fought for, but that they as poor farmers were being unfairly targeted by this tax, and flipped their fucking shit against the tax collectors that Hamilton sent out there to get it done. Like, one dude almost got his nose ground off on a whetstone. It was some scary hardcore mob shit. It got so bad GEORGE MOTHERFUCKING WASHINGTON had to ride out to Western PA as the COMMANDER OF THE FUCKING ARMY to settle this shit. 

Luckily, once he showed up everyone was like “OH FUCK IT’S THE PRESIDENT” and things were calmed down without actual bloodshed. Because it’s literally there in the Constitution that the Federal government had the authority to pass this tax:

The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States;

( Article I, Section 8, Clause 1 of the United States Constitution, SON!)

And that’s why I made a punch cocktail in honor of Alexander Hamilton and the Whiskey Rebellion. 

[nellachronism]

My very quick and dirty explanation of what the Whiskey Rebellion was all about. Citation needed, but I stand by that the gist is in the right place. 

[bessemerprocess]

If you are looking for a source, try Woody Holton’s Unruly Americans. It’ a good look at the super shady financial machinations of the founding fathers, and how the back country rebellions including the Whiskey Rebellion led to the Constitution. 

[ladybathgin]

..............................I admit, I’m a little confused. How did the Whiskey Rebellion of 1791 lead to the final of the original 13 states (RHODE ISLAND!) ratifying the Constitution in 1790? Or on that note play any roll in the creation of the Constitution outside of “Oh shit, now that we have this paper thing that says how our government should be, how do we implement it?”

[ladybathgin]

Hi! Actually I'm curious about the Whiskey Rebellion. I've never heard of it, what happened? Was during the Prohibition? I'm not a fan of whiskey of any sort, but yay history!!

So this is a very quick and dirty run down of my understanding of the Whiskey Rebellion. Yay!

The Whiskey Rebellion has actually NOTHING to do with Prohibition, but everything to do with the American Revolution! Yay!

So America right? No Taxation without Representation. Remember that one, it was one of the points patriots liked to whip out as justification for the Revolution (There were a few reasons but remember that one). Now mind you a lot of Americans were just used to like, NOT paying taxes and smuggling and stuff and took it really personally when Britain started really enforcing taxation *cough* John Hancock*cough*.

ANYWAY so, there was a war right? And after the 1780s, America is all trying to get its shit together and create a government and OOOOOPS the problem with WAR is that it takes a lot of money and America owed a TON of money to various European countries and banks. We were in serious debt and over here you have my man Secretary of the Treasury Alexander Hamilton trying to deal with it while also trying to strengthen the Federal government’s power over the states. (I’m not here to debate if that was good and necessary or the worst evil of American history, that’s just how it was)

Now, no one was going to let him tax people or property, you’d have another revolution on your hands! So we start with an taxing imports, which leads to Hamilton fighting the East Coast smuggling culture with the US Custom House and the creation of the Coast Guard and we start paying off our National Debt. YAY!

 But the imports were taxed to the limit and even JAMES MADISON is like “nah man we can’t tax imports anymore, we have to find another source of revenue.”

But again, you can’t tax people or property, because AMERICA.

BUT…what about Vice Taxes?

Vice taxes are what you place on items that aren’t necessary and are kinda bad, like booze and cigarettes. You can live without that shit. So Alexander Hamilton pushes for a tax on American-produced distilled spirits. Even if you’re in the back woods of Western Pennsylvania with one still, you’re going to get taxed on what you produce. Even JAMES MADISON backed this because hey, rampant alcoholism has always sort of been a problem in America (hence Prohibition).

Seems reasonable, no?

BRO.

Not only are you fucking with like, AN INGRAINED AMERICAN NATIONAL PASTTIME, you are also taxing what is considered the only reasonable way for farmers in the western frontier to get their produce to eastern markets without them spoiling. Like, grain alcohol in barrels was way easier to transport and was more cost effective than transporting grain. ALSO, whiskey was used as a form of currency because money was hard to come by in the west, so you kinda sorta ended up with an Income Tax on a bartering system.

So, farmers in the west felt that not only was that tax against the very “NO TAXATION WITHOUT REPRESENTATION” that the Revolution was fought for, but that they as poor farmers were being unfairly targeted by this tax, and flipped their fucking shit against the tax collectors that Hamilton sent out there to get it done. Like, one dude almost got his nose ground off on a whetstone. It was some scary hardcore mob shit. It got so bad GEORGE MOTHERFUCKING WASHINGTON had to ride out to Western PA as the COMMANDER OF THE FUCKING ARMY to settle this shit. 

Luckily, once he showed up everyone was like “OH FUCK IT’S THE PRESIDENT” and things were calmed down without actual bloodshed. Because it’s literally there in the Constitution that the Federal government had the authority to pass this tax:

The Congress shall have Power To lay and collect Taxes, Duties, Imposts and Excises, to pay the Debts and provide for the common Defence and general Welfare of the United States; but all Duties, Imposts and Excises shall be uniform throughout the United States;

( Article I, Section 8, Clause 1 of the United States Constitution, SON!)

And that’s why I made a punch cocktail in honor of Alexander Hamilton and the Whiskey Rebellion. 

[ladybathgin]

The Whiskey Rebellion (a Lady Bathtub Gin original)

OK SO, HAMILTON (THE MUSICAL) HAS CONSUMED MY LIFE. 

I saw it during it’s Public Theater run, and back then Washington’s song “One Last Time” was “One Last Ride” and involved George Washington descending upon the rebels of Western Pennsylvania while Alexander Hamilton yells “Pay Your Fucking Taxes!” behind him which wow could you nail my aesthetic any harder, show!?!?!? J. F. C.

(The lyrics to the version can be found here, and as is the case with all of the changes to Hamilton I’ve noticed, I completely understand WHY the new version nixes the whole bit about the Rebellion, but I still have a fondness for what is now lost)

Anyway, this punch is @linmanuel​‘s fault. 

A note of caution. This is a creation of my own historical nerdery and love of alcohol. I eyeballed the ingredients the first time, liked how it came out so much that I tried to measure them properly the second batch. Two batches were WAAAAAAAAY too much for 3 people. I’m not talking Fish House Punch that bested George Washington dangerous, but this is not a drink for a Wednesday night. 

Whiskey Rebellion Punch

4 oz. Applejack (we used Black Dirt, I think it has a stronger apple flavor)

3 oz. Rye Whiskey* (ALTHOUGH, Bourbon works if you prefer that**)

1 orange

several dashes of Orange bitters

several dashes of Dutch’s colonial bitters

whole cloves

1 cinnamon stick

2 bottles of a sweet cider - I used Angry Orchard because GRRH TAXES >:(

Cut the orange in half. Squeeze one half into your serving pitcher/bowl, and cut the other half into slices. Shove those slices full of cloves, I mean it, what we think of as mulling spices were super important to Colonial American drinking. Throw that cinnamon stick in as well because I’m not joking about the spices damnit. Add the applejack, whiskey and bitters, stir, and let chill in the fridge. This is going to infuse all that spicy goodness and blend those flavors and get it nice and cold so you don’t need to water it down with ice. Once it’s cold, add the two bottles of sweet cider. Serve it in tea cups, because to quote HAMILTON:

“ Look, when Britain taxed our tea, we got frisky 

 Imagine what gon' happen when you try to tax our whisky” 

-Jefferson, 1st Cabinet Battle

Enjoy, and pay your fucking taxes, my fellow Hamilton-trash. :)

****ANNOTATIONS!****

*Woodinville Rye Whiskey is what I had on hand and also is made in Washington state. Which is crazy appropriate, IMHO. 

** Look, some you might be new to the wide, wild world of hard spirits, and all this whiskey talk might be confusing. I used rye whiskey because 1) I didn’t have bourbon on hand and 2) I like rye. BUT! Here are the wham-bam-thank-you-m’am difference:

Rye Whiskey

1) doesn’t HAVE be American-made. *eyes Canada appreciatively*

2) HAS to be 51% rye, 49% whatever other grains you want to use. 

3) some other things that are technical

Bourbon Whiskey

1) HAS to be made-in-America. 

2) DOESN’T have to be made in Bourbon County, as there haven’t been distilleries in that county since before Prohibition.

3) HAS to be 51% corn, 49% other grains.

4) other technical shit you probably only want to know if you are going into distilling.

I mean there’s other super interesting historical stuff I can go into about WHY the Whiskey Rebellion happened, what it was about, etc etc but this post is long enough. Leave me an ask if you’d like to learn more!

[washingtonpost]

A 1974 government document shows how to make a proper cocktail.

[todaysdocument]

Well this cocktail chart has certainly made its way around in the last two weeks since our colleagues at usnatarchivesexhibits posted it.  Its origins had been a mystery (as many of you asked: “Why the heck would the Forest Service create a cocktail chart?”), but recently many of details came out.  

Esquire magazine pulled together details from the National Archives at Atlanta and the U.S. Forest Service and determined it was likely a joke by Forest Service engineer Cleve “Red” Ketcham, and probably only found its way into the National Archives by chance.

Looking for a copy of your own as the finishing touch to that vintage 70s-themed lounge?

As with most of our digitized records, you can download a free digital scan from the National Archives’ Catalog: https://catalog.archives.gov/id/7035823 (click the “Download Full Size Image” button)

Not the DIY type?  The archivesfoundation has matted prints available in the online store.

[ladybathgin]

Lady Bathgin's French 75

Or, I wish oh wish it were summer.

Hello, gentle readers. It is winter in New York, which isn't nearly as jaw-droppingly awful as winter in Boston, or Buffalo, or other places that begin with "B". But today I had to spend an hour out-of-doors trying to help my brother find his car. We were not successful, although it turns out we walked passed it twice. As it is his car and not mine, I feel that the blame for my frozen legs rests squarely on his shoulders.

And the whole time, I thought of summer in New York City, and the sweating, and the smells, and the constant fear of having some absolutely foul thing land on my be-sandal foot. But then I remembered things like gelato, specifically, a mix of lemon gelato and lavender honey gelato I once tried at around the corner of the NYC Tenement Museum--

And now that I am safely soaking in a nice hot bath far, far away from Harlem and lost cars*, I decided to share my alcoholic version of it with you all. Sorry, not sorry, traditional French 75. 

Lady Bathgin's French 75

1.5 oz dry London gin

.5 oz lemon juice

.75 oz (or more to taste) of lavender honey simple syrup

Brut bubbly white wine of your preference

lemon peel twist to garnish

First make the simple syrup. I know others will mock me for this but fuck them, I spent an hour helping my brother try to find his car that we walked passed twice, so like me, you can make this shit in the microwave. Put equal parts honey, lavender sugar**, and water in a cup. Place it in the microwave. For the love of God let it get hot, but don't let it bubble over. Hot honey sugar water is incredibly painful and will only ruin this otherwise magical experience. Carefully remove from microwave, let cool. If you are in a rush (like me, because of lost car frustrations), put it in the freezer for a bit. Do I look like I give a fuck? I'm drinking in the bathtub!

Once it is no longer BURNING, shake the simple syrup, gin and lemon juice with ice. Strain into champagne glass. Top with the bubbly, garnish with the lemon peel.

Enjoy with some lavender bath salts, or lavender bubbly bath. Lavender. Lavender FOREVER. 

~*~

*He did find it. Hours later. After I went home.

**ALRIGHT here's the deal. My mom made me lavender sugar, and I just keep food grade lavender around my house because I'm an old lady. Also the more lavender you use the pinker the syrup gets. PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANK. 

[ladybathgin]

Fish House Punch: Words of Warning

I bring new life to this old blog with a word of warning for the New Year.

Fish House Punch is not only a punch that snuck up on me, but that whispered sweet nothings even after it was pointing the dull point of a rusty knife in the general direction of my soft, fleshy bits. It then gave me instruction on how to empty out my spiritual bank accounts into an untraceable Swiss one. and then framed me for the murder of their spouse AND for whistle-blowing on the NSA while they ran for the border, manically laughing the whole way. I barely escaped with my life.  

According to Wikipedia, 

"America's first President, George Washington, was known to be fond of a drink or two, and sometimes more...and it’s said that after he partook of Fish House punch at Philadelphia’s State in Schuylkill, he couldn’t bring himself to make an entry in his diary for the following three days"

This punch bested George 'GD' Washington. What was I THINKING?!

  Fish House Punch

(as adapted for smaller servings from Vintage Spirits and Forgotten Cocktails. Doing so won't save you, but it might spare you.)

2 cups Jamaican Rum (we used Appleton)

1 cup brandy (we used Christian Brothers Brandy)

.25 cup peach brandy

.25 maraschino liqueur*

1 cup green tea

.5 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice

1 cup, or more or less to taste, super fine sugar

champagne to top off

Put everything but the champagne in a bowl. For the green tea, I recommend cold brewing it, aka, just let the tea leaves sit in cold water and they will infuse, don't stress it. Let sit in the fridge for at least a whole day, even two if you can manage. We didn't do this. DON'T SKIP THIS STEP. I mean, I doubt doing so would have saved us, but in the sober light of 2 days later, I like to pretend it would have.

Eat a good dinner. Do not drink anything alcoholic before you start on this. DRINK. WATER. Do NOT sit in the bath. Do not email your boyfriend half way through. 

Definitely play Cards Against Humanity, though.

This punch served four people, but played merry hell with two of them.

*this was almost as expensive as the rum, but entirely worth it and now I have a recipe for flaming bananas. 

[ladybathgin]

The Mint Julep

  It’s been humid here in NYC, the sort of humid that makes one give up on dry clothes and decent hair. So what better bath side drink than the mint julep, a classic from the land of the truly hot n’ humid!

On that note, I apologizes for the sad state of my mint garnish. I had half a bunch left in my refrigerator and it was a ‘use it or lose it’ moment.

  The Mint Julep

3 oz Bourbon Whiskey

2 teaspoons water

2 teaspoons sugar (or, to taste. It's best on the 'sweet tea' side of sweet)

A good handful of mint leaves

Crushed ice

I recommend muddling the mint, sugar and water in a separate cup, and then throwing that in a microwave for 30-50 seconds. The slight heat helps melt the sugar, and release more of the mint aroma and taste. OF COURSE, I’m sure there are people who would be horrified at this suggestion, but I find it works perfectly, so *blows raspberries*

Now, the drink is traditionally served in a metal (usually pewter or silver) mug. I don’t have room for that sort of thing in my wee little apartment, so I use a small coffee mug instead. The bonus is that it keeps the ice from melting faster, yay!

Pour the mint simple syrup and half of the whiskey into a glass. Crush a mug’s worth of ice with a blender or a hammer*. Pack the mug with the ice, and top off with the rest of the whiskey. Gently pinch a remaining mint spring to release the aroma; garnish your drink.

Sit back in the tub, and think of cool breezes and horse races.

Enjoy!

  *crushing ice with a hammer: put the ice in a plastic bag. Wrap it in a towel. Smash it with a hammer. DO NOT DO THIS OVER TILE, OR BREAKABLE THINGS. BE AWARE OF YOUR AIM AND STRENGTH!

[ladybathgin]

The White Lady

It's the first officially hot day in New York City, so there's no better time for a cold drink and a (slightly warm to chill) bath!

One day I was in the mood for a margarita, but finding myself sadly lacking the necessary tequila and limes, made do with gin and lemons. I liked the results so much I looked up the cocktail name.

The White Lady.

*looks at self*

Touché, cocktail, touché.

    The White Lady

2 ounces dry gin (I prefer Gordon's myself)

1/2 ounce Cointreau

1/2 ounce lemon juice

For a non-vegan variation, add 1 egg white. Shake vigorously with ice. Serve in cocktail glass with sugar rim, and with a twisted lemon peel if you're feeling faaaaaaaancy.

'Egg white? The DEUCE?' I might hear you say. I may write up a separate post about this, but egg white cocktails are AWESOME. They do not make your concoction smell or taste of eggs. What it DOES is make your drink silky smooth on the tongue and gives it a lovely foam if you shake it enough. Don't fear the raw egg white.

With the egg white, the drink is silky and protein-y. Without it, it is still delicious and smooth. The sweetness comes from the sugar rim, but the mix of liquors is wonderful enough to be enjoyable without the sugar.

So, here's looking at you, kids! Cheers!

[nevver]

The Cocktail Chart of Film & Literature (larger)

[ladybathgin]

I will naturally have to make each and every one.

[ladybathgin]

Questions I Hope to Avoid Being Asked Frequently

  Lady Bathgin? The deuce?

The deuce you say.

A while ago a good friend of mine on a wing of whim and fancy started a tumblr called Captain Showerbeer; a users' guide to beers that can be (or worst, won't be) enjoyed in the shower. 

While I enjoy beer and showering, after a long day or a workout, I'd much rather sink in a bubble or Epsom salt bath than take a shower. I also have a minor love affair with trying my hand at making new cocktails. As I'm hoping these things sound marvelous to more than just myself, Lady Bathgin was born.

Wait, so this isn't a tumblr for making small batch home made hooch?

Nope.

Well, that's a disappointment.

I barely have time to play around with the beer making kit I got for Christmas years back, never mind the mead or cider I want to ferment. I've also read enough about the dangers of wood alcohol to want to leave the ardent spirits distilling to the professionals.

Well, then what's the point of Lady Bathgin?

To expound upon the pleasures and practices of drinking cocktails in the bath, of course!

So you're just stealing her idea.

Nonsense! Besides I pitched the idea to her first and she thought it would make a fun sister blog to Captain Showerbeer so nyah nyah nyah. :p

Alright then, smart ass, so you're mixing this stuff while in the tub? Where do you put the juice while in the bath then?

Beers are made for showers, but cocktails are perfect for the bath. You don't have to bother with flasks or leaning out of the spray and the like; glassware and a basic spatial awareness are all you require. Unless you are truly and dangerously careless in the bath, there is little to no danger of water or soap splashing into your glass, or of knocking your drink over. Mix your cocktail while your tub is filling up, and I do suggest you avoid placing your drink on the tub edge, or on other narrow surfaces. In the bath, the floor is your closest friend, well within easy reach in your time of need (although my toilet seat cover is an excellent perch for my potion).

Seriously, you drink in your bathroom? That seems so unhygienic.

Bleach, elbow grease, and a regular cleaning schedule is your friend, my friend.

Drinking in the bath? How do you have time for that? That seems so...DECADENT.

That is is, my good man, that it is. If you have a tub, time and a small amount of ingredients, you too can create a high class escape for yourself, an oasis of sinfully rich luxury, at least until the water gets cold.

But! But I don't have the TIME for a BATH!

BUT!--

No, I'm serious. Look, I'm not saying bath-and-booze every night, but make a date with yourself. Get a candle, a cocktail you enjoy or have been wanting to try for a long time, some sweet tunes, and Do It. You're body, mind and soul will thank you. And in the end of the day, it's waaaaaay cheaper than a spa.

No, I mean, but I don't have a bath tub.

......................

:(

How many cocktails should one drink in the bath?

One.

HEED ME! Try to make this little experience more about creating a single, delicious beverage to savor in the bath instead of a one way ticket to bodily blitzkrieg. Between the heat of the water, your own body chemistry and the concoction, you want to still be able to get out of the bath after your toes have gone prune-y, and I'll be trying to pick cocktails that are sippers, not quaffers. You want a drink that will last from getting in to ultimate toe wrinkling, and that helps relax you rather than incapacitate you.

In other words, don’t be That Guy.

That Guy?

I say Guy in a gender neutral way, but yes, don’t be the person who drinks so much you pass out/slip getting out and your roommate has to fish your naked ass out of the tub. That is decidedly dangerous, never mind unclassy.

Can’t I just drink beer and/or wine?

By all means! Just remember to listen to your liver and bits. We want relaxation, not hospitalization.

I think you might be a bit of a lush.

*raises glass *

But you aren’t actually a professional mixologist.

That is correct! I am an enthusiastic amateur. But I will try to be as spot on in the cocktails or variations I post, and will try to keep all mistakes and untruths to the barest of minimums. This—like drinking in the bath—should be for fun!

7. Do you take requests/suggestions?

Of course! If you have a cocktail you adore and would like to share, send me the recipe and I will try to recreate it the best I can!