Northern Lights

Ideas are bulletproof || 🇨🇦🏳️‍⚧️

[lanceinwonderland]

If one repeats “gender is a social construct” as a mantra but does not say the same for sexual orientation, I’m not gonna take you seriously at all

Reddit - Dive into anything

Reddit - Dive into anything

(Great read)

[lanceinwonderland]

I’ve been so horny lately why 😭😭

[lanceinwonderland]

Apparently it's not only me that feels lots of fine arts including ones with religious undertones are kinda meant to be erotic. Some literally make my mind full of sex lol. Someone familiar with art history just told me that:

"A lot of old nude 'fine art' was made for the 'personal collections' of wealthy gentlemen. It was porn. A lot of fine art was designed to be porn. The church commissioned the same artists who likely just kept their art style. There is no clear distinction between porn and art because a lot of art was privately commissioned porn."

I've never thought of it that way, but it makes perfect sense. They didn't have the internet and mass printed porn magazines etc are also relatively modern. You learn something new every day.

/jk See, women's bodies are just so arousing to us! I can't focus on anything other than my dick whenever I see the naked female form regardless of context, even if it's only an old oil painting that isn't intended to be erotic at all! How could we let THESE people into women's locker rooms??

Although I'm a trans man not a trans woman, which contradicts the TERF narrative...

[quote-bomber]

First ever recorded snowball fight (1897)

Happy Holidays And Merry Christmas To All!

[solarmama-plantsareneat]

Colorized!

Guy On Bicycle gets so smeared he leaves his hat behind to escape!

All Victorian ADULTS. Awesome.

[atlinmerrick]

I love this so much. Someone slowed it down so it's not the old-fashioned herky-jerky of old films, now someone colorized it…the past feels like the present because, well, people. Lookit them having fun! *beams at everyone*

[lanceinwonderland]

The English pug and the French poodle / Le caniche français et le carlin anglais

(Note the word order)

“The cultural distance between English and French Canadians” / « l’éloignement culturel entre canadiens français et anglais »

[lanceinwonderland]

Why is it so warm indoors everywhere from shopping malls to churches 😭 I’m sweating so much even with only a T-shirt on

Typical North American “sustainability” lmao

[lanceinwonderland]

LOL the urinal in this restaurant is mounted so high for some reason

Do they think like everyone is over 6’??

[lanceinwonderland]

This is NOT what I’m expecting to see in a trans sub today lmao

I suppose they mean they’re not stationed in the high Arctic? Like Alert? 😂

[lanceinwonderland]

OP confirmed my guess lol

(Fun fact: CFS Alert is the northmost permanent human settlement in the world)

[lanceinwonderland]

This is NOT what I’m expecting to see in a trans sub today lmao

I suppose they mean they’re not stationed in the high Arctic? Like Alert? 😂

[lanceinwonderland]

Stylized top surgery scars irritate me to no end - like surely everyone can see this doesn't actually help anyone, other than transphobes that believe they have a god given right to "always tell"? Who are you actually helping by teaching more cis people how to clock trans people? We should teach cis people why some people need to transition to live happy lives, not the details of what medical procedures we may choose to go through.

There really are two different kinds of "visibility". One is making people know this particular group of people exist and how to deal with it if someone tells you they belong to this minority. One is "how to identify all members of this group of people in daily life". The former is necessary for eventual acceptance but the latter is harmful. Like, I think the HIV/AIDS awareness campaign is a better example. People of course need to be aware of what is risky and what is completely safe, and know that our HIV treatment is fairly decent right now so it's not a death sentence even if you're unfortunately infected. But there's no campaign running around telling everyone how the meds HIV+ people usually take look like, or if someone adheres to their meds schedule extremely tightly they might be HIV+. That would be an extremely fucked up thing to do. Yet people are doing this to us all day every day.

And those "arts" are always so exaggerated. Almost like a caricature really. As if everyone who had DI has scars like two red pythons on their chest. That's not even to mention many people had keyhole or peri. Now even cis guys who had gynecomastia surgery and unfortunately didn't have their scars fade completely are regularly harassed if they ever show their bare chest, because people believe they must be trans.

I still have the fear of being clocked in super progressive places like Toronto. I've not lived there long term but visit frequently, probably every one or two months. So far it hasn't happened. I've played such hypothetical scenarios many times in my head, as in how to react if someone says something that implies they know I'm trans. I usually land on just acting very confused and slightly offended, like "what? But I'm a guy". I feel that reacting too strongly would either make them more certain in their correctness, or they would assume I'm transphobic, which I'd like to avoid. But just shrugging may also seem like an acknowledgement. Ughhh. I just wish people could stop doing this to each other. My gf stayed stealth in Montreal for 3 years so we joke around saying that must mean she's conventionally feminine enough to stay stealth almost anywhere in the world.

Another thing is whenever 99% of cis people and even a huge number of trans people hear "a trans man", they automatically think "a man with a vagina" (vice versa for trans women). As if somehow, trans people post bottom surgery are less trans than those pre bottom surgery. As if none of us has bottom dysphoria so severe that they don't wish to use their natal genitals for sex. The thought grosses me out yet I know it's true. Not gonna lie, a huge part of not wanting people to know is because I don't want them to think I don't have a dick or like think about my genitals at all. 

So many people do superficial performative things like replacing male/female or men/women with AMAB/AFAB, which literally benefits no one. I would even argue it's more transphobic than the traditional "genital shape = sex = gender" view, as it implies it's something magical that once assigned at birth, can never, ever be changed under any circumstances. A walk-in clinic my gf used to go to replaced all their "sex" fields with "sex at birth", and they even put it on your medical notes, the ones that you may need to show your employer to take medical leave. How does that help anyone exactly? She was so annoyed that she eventually left when she managed to find another doctor. I wouldn't completely disregard the possibility that it was indeed designed to out trans people, since many cis people feel they're entitled to "always know". I haven't encountered this personally but she also had companies collecting demographic data of both "sex" and "gender" in job applications. What the hell? I just put male and never out myself whatever terminology they use.

TLDR: Most people don't actually want to learn out of deeply ingrained transphobic ideas, because that would require them to reflect and maybe uproot their entire worldview.

[lanceinwonderland]

The thing about POC laughing at racist jokes is, racist beliefs are not, have never been, and won't ever be exclusive to white people. That's an extremely reductive view. It's obviously true that due to historical reasons (European led colonization, etc) racism in places like the US or Canada is rarely if ever directed at white people. But that doesn't mean POC don't internalize racist ideas towards their own group, or they can't be racist towards a non-white group other than their own. On the other hand it also doesn't mean "white" people never face racism anywhere - some Western Europeans are pretty racist to Eastern Europeans even though most are white as paper.

During the peak of covid pandemic some racist attacks against Asians were carried out not by white but by black or brown people - an inconvenient truth that many don't want to acknowledge. It also goes the other way around, some Asians are very racist towards brown and black people, especially among first generation immigrants. My parents are like that. Please understand I'm not taking an anti-immigration stance - my opinion is quite the opposite actually. This country can't survive without all the new people coming in each year for their hopes and dreams. But the unfortunate fact is that on average, people who grew up in more conservative, monoethnic places don't get educated on the harm of even the existence of racism as much. It really originates from the tribal mentality that all humans share more or less. And it takes effort to combat, lots of effort.

[lanceinwonderland]

I think there's some degree of "pussy power" (sorry for the word) shit going on among some online transmasc communities. That they believe it's misogynistic to say you hate having female reproductive organs, especially the V. All the "body positive" stuff really only ever applies to women/the "female" body, not only in a trans context if I'm being honest, so I just roll my eyes at the hypocrisy.

So many progressive people shame short men, men with a small penis, men with moobs, men that aren't "ripped", etc. Who makes post after post telling men that our bodies don't have to fit a particular ideal, that we're all beautiful in our own way? No one cares. Teenage guys abusing anabolic steroids to boost their gym gains is a national crisis in Canada. Even the phrase "big dick energy" is problematic.

The thing is body shaming conveniently attacks trans/intersex men disproportionately yet if you ask these people, they'll say "oh, I didn't mean you!" That’s like the most common excuse of bigotry ever. Oh, black people are just more inclined to commit crimes, but my black friends are fine! Totally not racist!

I'm especially annoyed by this because as an Asian guy there's already so many stereotypes of us being less masculine than other races in the West. So many jokes about Asian guys only knowing nerdy hobbies instead of talking to women. That we're "safe" so women don't need to put up their guards around us. That we have small dicks. That they won't date us because they "need a strong man to protect them". That we always bottom if we're gay. Which if you haven't noticed yet (I assume you did), are all also common stereotypes used to emasculate trans men. Surprise surprise.

There's also the idea that like, men are also hurt by the patriarchy but it’s reeaaally all our own fault. As if saying toxic masculinity (it's a loaded word but I'm using it loosely here) are oftentimes forced upon men and boys by other men (which is true) somehow makes it less serious or awful. They don't say it out aloud but the implication is really "so it's not our problem". It's totally not like women, especially older conservative women, frequently use misogynistic standards to judge other women. Yet we acknowledge that misogyny is a systemic issue, that even women who perpetuate it are also its victims in their own ways, even though they may not realize it. The same empathy is rarely extended to men who fall victim to unrealistic masculine ideals.

Many SA stats don't even count men being forced to penetrate someone (which is actually the more common form), only those forcibly penetrated. Which pretty much gives most female-on-male SA a free pass. Of course it's not a problem if we just don't count it, just like how anti trans hate crime wouldn't exist if we don't count those as hate crimes! /s. It also shows up as in biased news reports like, "teacher A (male) raped a student" but "teacher B (female) had sex with a minor". Having sex with a minor when you're their teacher is rape, period. They're technically the same in the eyes of the law (though actual application might still be biased as always), but very, very obviously not in lots of people's minds.

[lanceinwonderland]

From the river to the sea

[lanceinwonderland]

[lanceinwonderland]

Mom: do I need to turn on data roaming now that we’re in Quebec

Me: no mom we’re still the same country at least as of now, despite some people wishing otherwise 😂 the sovereignty cause hasn’t yet realized 😂

[lanceinwonderland]

Sigh, travelling with parents is like bringing a kid with you these days 😅

My mom never stops complaining she can’t always get what she suddenly wants at the moment immediately but when you ask her to plan the day then she says she has no idea and I should make the decision

[lanceinwonderland]

Mom: do I need to turn on data roaming now that we’re in Quebec

Me: no mom we’re still the same country at least as of now, despite some people wishing otherwise 😂 the sovereignty cause hasn’t yet realized 😂

[lanceinwonderland]

Reconnecting with someone who you haven’t contacted for ages is WILD it’s as if you could just pick up the conversation where you left it still

We’ve both grown so much it’s surreal