{ La Petite Fawn }

twenty-two / blogger, cat lover, frustrated writer, coffee drinker, overthinker, list-maker, and a book lover

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The Happy List

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Everyone has their own happy bubble, and there are so many things that can make us happy. So I’m gonna share you the little things that made me happy for the whole week. This won’t be another blog link-up but you can do it too if you want to :) This week has been a roller coaster of emotions and these are what’s in my happy bubble. Waken up by your sweet little cat beside you.

The smell of hot coffee on a rainy wednesday morning.

Watching horror films at 2 AM with the one you love.

Reading posts from strangers and learned something.

The cold weather during nighttime.

Random compliments.

Reading a book to sleep.

Dinner date with trustworthy people and catching up.

Discovering a new place.

Long car rides on a cold monday night.

Sleep after a long tiring day. Yes!

What’s in your happy bubble this week? ^~^

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Au revour, July. Bonjour August!

Leaving you with a bunch of #notetoself photos I’ve been reminding myself lately. Au revoir, July. Bonjour August! I’m not quite sure how it got here, this august.. really. I can’t believe it’s already eight months into the year, three months til birthday month, and four more months and it’s a new year again. Okay, let’s slow down a little bit. July has been quite a challenging month for me. I had longer nights than sunny days and it’s pretty unusual. Lately I’ve been having a hard time sleeping at night, most of the time I go to work with only three to four hours of sleep. How tiring it was taking in calls half-awake, dealing people with kindness but they only shout and greet you with a curse? It’s a struggle. Ugh. A friend gave me an advice to take this tea to help me with my sleeping struggles but problem is I forgot what kind of tea it was! Was it jasmine, lavender, or chamomile tea? Ah, if any of you know what tea is best aid for sleeping please do let me know. I’d really appreciate it :) On a different note, La Petite Fawn has a new theme for August! Say goodbye to pinkish background layout and hello to a neater theme with gold (or is it bronze?) accent. I actually made this as a comeback theme but only had this up just now because it needed some tweaking and stuff. Anyway, I hope you guys like it! Comments, suggestions would be great just leave them in the comment box. :) Guess that’s it for tonight’s post, this lady needs to rest. Caught fever yesterday and I’m suffering of back pains and mild headache and I badly need a decent sleep for work. Shift is at two AM! *cries* I hope everyone’s having a wonderful weekend! xx (P.S I apologize there's no Friday Favorites post this week. Wasn't really feeling well and I hate to post another late #FF post. Huhuhu.)

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Friday Favorites // 01

This was supposed to be published yesterday but I really had a bad internet connection last night so let’s just pretend today’s Friday, okay? ;) So… These past few days I’ve been blog hopping looking for some new blogs to read and then I stumbled upon a lifestyle blog on blogspot (sorry I couldn’t remember the url tsk), she had this blog link-up party on her blog and I really had a good time reading the entries and visiting the blogs that were linked up on the post. So I had this idea, to do my own blog link up called Friday Favorites which I will be posting every Friday (obviously) and it would be all about my favorites! From my top three favorite movies, to top three favorite bloggers, to favorite indie songs, etc. It’s one way of letting you guys know more about me, so why not try it.. right? You guys can also do this and have your blog linked up to mine (through the widget at the end of the post) and together let’s have some fun finding new blogs and friends! It will be cool! :)

Jeffrey Chung // Jeffrey is a second year law student based in Sydney, Australia. I came across his instagram account while searching for minimalist theme grids and I gave it an instant follow! I mean, who doesn’t want to have that kind of feed? I really wanted to have a feed like his but I really can’t stick to just grey, white and black stuff. I tried, but it was a failure. Boooo! If you’re loving what you’re seeing in his account, then you’ll probably check out his blog.

Jomayra Texeira // A twenty-nine year old photographer originally from Puerto Rico. He came to United States when he was 12 and have lived in New York for several years now. When I first saw his feed I was all wow and aweeeee. I was really amazed with his feed. There’s something about his photos that I just can’t explain… I like how his photos have this drama effect and just captures how New York is- on sunny days.. even on rainy days. Go through his feed and be amazed on how he photograph reflections in water!

Valerie Chua // Some of you might already know who Valerie Chua is. An Asian based painter/illustrator. I first followed her on her blog quietgirl.net which she already took down years ago. Ever since I followed her blog, my artsy self have been really inspired which made me try painting (which I totally suck at) and drawing. I didn’t have any decent materials back then and I don’t know all those kind of brushes and its purposes (it’s confusing!), so I used whatever I can find- an old watercolor and a bunch of cotton buds. Hahaha yeah, cotton buds. I know, I know. Well the outcome was pretty cool and a bit satisfying so it’s not really a total fail! :) Anyway, Valerie will always be an inspiration to me when it comes to art. Check out her feed and you’ll see her cute little bunny in some of the photos! I still have a lot of Insta-favorites but that would be a very long list. Now it’s your turn to share your favorites! If you want to do this Friday Favorites and be part of the link-up party, just link-up your most recent Friday Favorites post below, following the same format of Name @ Blog Name (ex. Jean @ La Petite Fawn). Don’t forget to link back to this post and check out the blogs who linked up as well! Let’s make new friends. :)

WIDGET SITE IS CURRENTLY DOWN :( JUST LEAVE YOUR LINKS IN THE COMMENTS.

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Life is but a train to the next stop..

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It was a monday, around 11 pm, and I was having a depressing night. Sad thoughts all over my head and I needed someone to vent it out. Someone who doesn’t know me, someone who won’t judge me. And for some reason, the word ‘omegle’ popped out of my head. I’ve heard of the site before but didn’t bother about it, but that night I decided to give it a try.

The stranger said hi, I replied hello. He asked where I’m from and without thinking I replied “From the other side of the world. I’m a lost soul. Wandering. I found my death.” Woah what made me say that? Because of depression? I don’t know. I pretended I’m a lost soul and I thought he would laugh at me and call me crazy. But instead he replied “Surely all the lost can be found? But why are you still here? Can you not see the light?” I was quite shocked. I expected the opposite response. So the convo went on and stories have been made. Every line seems to make sense.

“But.. life is a train to the next stop. When you die, you arrived. What lies beyond that next stop? Another train?” He asked. “I don’t know. I guess death. It’s just like a bus stop.” I replied. I didn’t know what else to say and I was getting a little bit sleepy and tired so decided to leave the chat. But before we ended it, he told me, “Keep on wandering my friend, til you find that next bus. Til you see the light.”

I don’t know what I’m pointing out here or if this post makes any sense at all but I’m glad I found comfort, somehow, from a stranger. But his question though, still bothers me. What lies beyond that next stop?

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Life Recently

Recently I’ve been…

Reading // This Is What Happy Looks Like by Jennifer E. Smith. I usually finish a book in just a day or two, but this book takes me forever to finish. Not because of the plot or any reasons related to the book but because I don’t have that much time anymore. Work has been stressful lately and whenever I reach home, I just wanted to spend my time in bed and just sleep throughout the day. I am that tired most of the days. *sigh

Listening // I made a new playlist of indie songs last tuesday and I’ve been listening to it since. Some of the tracks were Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by Daniela Andrade, Little Worrier by Kina Grannis, and a few Regina Spektor songs that were used as soundtracks in movies. My love for indie music will never fade.

Watching // I’m currently finishing an anime series - Jigoku Shoujo Futakomori. The story revolves around a girl named Ai Enma, who’s also known as Jigoku Shoujo (Hell Girl). Her job consists of carrying out grudges on the behalf of the people who request her service. She’ll help you send people to hell (easy, right?), but the hardest part is you will also be sent to hell.. that is after your natural life comes to an end. Interesting plot, eh?

Feeling // My heart’s filled with joy at the moment. :) Life been treating me well for the past month. Although there are tiny bits and pieces of negative happenings sometimes (it’s inevitable!), I’m still very thankful that things were falling in the right places. Never let the negativity eat you alive!

Eating // I had two slices of mango float last night. My boyfriend’s sister made it and it was one of the best I’ve ever tasted, next to mom’s of course!

Writing // Proses of what if’s and if ever’s and whatnots.

Planning // I didn’t buy a replacement camera after I broke mine three years ago because I thought my phone’s camera would be enough to take photos, but last night I’ve come across an online shop and spotted a cute point-and-shoot camera which was really cheap by the way (but has good features).. So I’m planning to buy one soon! Must save for it first. Hmmm.

How about you? How have you been lately? :) xx

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The Osmena Peak Experience

This is an overdue post but I’d like to share to you guys my first ever trekking experience two months ago. We spent one wednesday to trek the highest point on the island of Cebu - Osmena Peak. I was with my boyfriend, a close friend, our supervisor at work and his husband. We left the meeting place and spent almost three hours (three hours of super fun joyride and kpop music blasting in the car) to get to the foot of the peak. We arrived there at almost two in the morning and the weather’s freezing cold!

We met locals from the area who were very generous in offering to guide us without any fee. Three kids accompanied us and they were only wearing shirts, shorts, and slippers. I almost didn’t believe they’d make it because seriously the weather’s really cold and I was already shivering wearing thick jacket and shoes! We trekked for almost three hours and reached the destination at four AM. The sun wasn’t up yet and the weather’s way much colder up there! But despite the cold weather, I got to sleep with nothing but my bag as my pillow and blanket as bed. Haha, crazy right? When I woke up at around five-thirty in the morning, it was really foggy. The sun’s up but you can’t really see it because of the thick fog surrounding the area. We stayed there for two good hours, took lots of photos and met a group of trekkers as we made our way down the mountain.

Going down the mountain was much easier than going up. The cold weather was replaced with sunshine and it immediately painted a smile on my face because finally I get to take clearer photos! These photos were taken with my phone as we were making our way down the mountain.

I never thought I get to experience this kind of adventure - well not at this point, not this year. It was exhausting and quite painful (painful? well for me who has a weak stamina) but the experience was worth the pain because I got to prove myself that I can do things I thought I couldn’t do. Maybe for some of you going up a mountain might be an easy pie but for me it’s not. And also, I got to see another amazing, breathtaking creation by the Man up above. Nature is love, nature is life. Go trekking - done! Now I have 95 things left to do in my bucketlist! :) Now, what’s next?

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After a Long Break

It has been a year since I last logged in and posted something in here. Way back 2012, I made a post saying I’m going on a short break due to unstable internet connection but that ‘short’ break turned into a long break which I didn’t expect. I hadn’t posted regularly in over two years and I admit somewhere in those years I realized I had fallen out of blogging and lost passion. Even though I did not closed the blog, not posting made me feel sad and a bit guilty.

So why did I come back? So much has changed in two years- I’ve been really busy with the life outside the cyber world. I’ve got myself a job, tried to live independently, and lived the life away from the web. But sometimes I feel like something was missing out of my life. That’s why I came back. Blogging was very much a creative outlet for me, to document my everyday life, to share my thoughts, to be inspired and being able to inspire others. I am very much happy to be blogging again and hoping that this new journey would be as memorable as it was three years ago. :)

P.S. If you’ve been following this blog since the hiatus and you’ve changed URL, please do let me know through the comments (Disqus) or you can message me. It would be lovely too see old readers! xx

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Quick update! Feel free to follow me on Instagram @jeanpixie ;)

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Hey everyone! Yes yes it’s me, it’s La Petite Fawn you’re seeing on your dashboards. I can’t believe it has been almost a year (9 months to be exact) since I last blogged here! It seemed like years to me, wah! So before anything else, I just want to say thank you veryyyy much to everyone who still stick with my blog and dropped me messages even if I was MIA for quite a while. It really means a lot to me. I also want to welcome all the new lovely readers! Welcome to my little blog <3

So, how’s everyone? I know this is not much of a proper post you guys were expecting, but I just want to let you know that I’m still alive and that this blog won’t be deactivating. Take this post as a sign of my comeback! :) Also, LPF will be having a new layout which will be up real soon, so look forward to that! For the meantime, keep in touch with me through Twitter and Instagram, follow me @JeanPixie (that goes for both sites) and let’s have a mini catch up session.

I guess that’s it for now, til then ♡

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Ohh truly miss you Jean!!! I always waiting for you on my dashboard, I'm so excited and a little bit surprised when I saw the lapetitefawn word!! Kyaa ><

Hi Jilli! Sorry it took so long for me to appear on your dashboard again. But here I am, slowly coming back from the looooong hiatus. I missed you too and everyone as well x

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Jean! When will you going back? I really missed your posts :D Though I am not pressuring you at all, I respect your decisions, hoping you'll have a lovely day ahead! God bless and we're just here for you, no matter what <3

It's been a while eh? At last, successfully logged in on lapetitefawn. Tumblr keeps logging me out :( Anyways, hi Issa! I don't know when will I be officially back. I'm only using mobile right now and it's quite hard to do things here. I REALLY MISS BLOGGING ON HERE!! SO MUCH, YOU DON'T HAVE ANY IDEA. But I promise to be back. Haunt me and kill me when I don't hehehe. I miss everyone so much, especially the ones I usually talk to :(You can catch me on Twitter though, follow me @jeanpixie ♡

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Take me to Caffé Florian!

Hello everyone! Guess who’s back from the said semi-hiatus but it turned out to be an unsaid long hiatus. I apologize for being missing in action. Anyway, I miss you guys soooo much! We still don’t have our internet connection (yes til now) and I’m getting really impatient about it. I guess we’d have it back by next year, hopefully. Meanwhile, here’s a queued post for everyone. Happy Holidays! ♡

If you’re an old follower of this blog, I’m pretty sure you already know that I have love for coffee and little bit for tea. Sitting in the third place on my bucket list, is to visit different coffee shops from different countries. I’ve already listed some lovely places to visit and one of them is Caffé Florian.

Caffé Florian is a historical coffee house (oldest cafe in Venice) situated in the Procuratie Nuove of Piazza San Marco, Venice. I fell in love the first time I laid my eyes on the place. History and good food all in one - perfect.

One thing very attractive is the beautiful original interiors. If I ever get the chance to visit this place, I don’t think I would ever get tired of taking pictures of just about everything. Everything is just so beautiful! Oh and there is a live music at night - small orchestras playing :)

I hope you enjoyed the picture-filled post. All photos are from flickr and edited by yours truly, credits to the owners (I’ll put proper credits when I’m officially back).

On a different note, if you want to catch up with me, you could add/subscribe me on Facebook! Just please let me know (through message) that you’re a follower from tumblr so that I could accept your request. I MISS YOU ALL SO MUCH, I REALLY DO. I can’t wait to be officially back and respond to every single message I have in my inbox. Oh by the way, I’d like to thank everyone who left me messages, to those who still stick with me, and to those who still remember me. You guys made me feel really loved. I’m blessed. Til then, xoxo.

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Why is your blog so pretty? And I love your writing. Makes me want to curl up with a cup of coffee and watch the rain fall.

Aww that's a lovely compliment! I'm glad you enjoyed my writing love. I love hearing feedback from my readers :) Hearing that makes me want to write even more. Thank you! xx

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I remember being four years old and picking up daisies on a cloudy day was my favourite thing to do. I bring them home and wait for them to wilt and when the time comes that they're started to fall out, I put them between the pages of my favorite bedtime book. My mom would scold me for doing it. She told me that it might leave yellow stains on the pages, but I didn't care. I refuse to care 'cos doing it makes me happy. I remember being four years old and I was carefree.

I remember being eight years old and having bike races was my least thing to do. My childhood friend tried to teach me how and I'd only get knee scratches every time I try. He would laugh at me at every fall but still reaches out his hand for me to hold, helping me to stand up. I remember hitting my knee on a huge rock and screamed at the top of my lungs. I had a big scratch on my left knee. I remember being eight years old and thought God sent him to me to ease the pain of the fall.

I remember being fourteen and falling in love was the most beautiful thing in the world. There's this boy I bumped into when I was making my way to my fourth afternoon class. We exchanged glances for a second then passed through each other's sides. Months later, we started dating.. and became official on the 4th of July. We believed we were each other's soulmates. But we had to separate ways and only God knows why. I remember being fourteen and got my heart broken for the first time.

Today, I'm twenty and all those precious moments are now part of the history. Memories... that's what they call it.

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Hello, Dearest Jean! You are really an amazing writer, I love how you express yourself through your posts. Maybe someday you'de be an Author. Haha! And btw, Belated happy birthday. Hihi. Sorry If I am late. :c I really love youuuu, Hope you wont ignore this message.

That sounds lovely.. but author of a book you mean? I don't think so. As much as I love writing I don't think I'd like to be an author. I mean yes I could put my emotions and imaginations to paper but I don't think that would be enough. Writing a book could take forever and I can only write really well when I'm deep sadness (and crying). I prefer to be the reader. But thanks though! So nice of you for thinking so :) And thanks for the greetings! loveyoutoo x

I took it seriously, oops.

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Des photographies et des Souvenirs

“Jay Maisel always says to bring your camera, ‘cause it’s tough to take a picture without it. Pursuant to the above aforementioned piece of the rule book, subset three, clause A, paragraph four would be… use the camera. Put it to your eye. You never know. There are lots of reasons, some of them even good, to just leave it on your shoulder or in your bag. Wrong lens. Wrong light. Aaahhh, it’s not that great, what am I gonna do with it anyway? I’ll have to put my coffee down. I’ll just delete it later, why bother? Lots of reasons not to take the dive into the eyepiece and once again try to sort out the world into an effective rectangle. It’s almost always worth it to take a look.”

I was going through my old folders and saw these photos which were taken earlier this year, when boyfriend took me out to a pool date. It was the same day I taught him about shooting in macro. I can’t really remember which was his work but I’m pretty sure the first and second photos were taken by me. :) I was experimenting with photoshop last night and so happy I’ve created a new action! I used it with these photos. What do you guys think?

P.S. I don’t think I owe anyone an apology but… I’m so sorry if I haven’t posted anything about my birthday celebration. It wasn’t that great (as some of you expected it to be) and remembering it saddens me a little. But I’m gonna post about it! Probably this weekend. Hope everyone had a wonderful day xo

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Thoughts on a Monday

i. Do you ever wonder if you were someone's biggest regret? If they ever think of you and wonder what would've happened if they had he guts to talk to you or stay with you? Or does anyone think of you and regret the time they spent with you? With all the regrets I have, I can only imagine how many regrets others have about me.

ii. Just because I don't let people know that it bothers me, doesn't mean it doesn't bothers me. Because even after all this time, it still bothers the hell out of me.

iii. I wasn't always so guarded. I used to let my feelings show and trust people more. But once you get hurt, something inside you snaps. You change yourself based on he times you've gotten hurt and you're never the same. No one ever stays innocent.

iv. I was there for you when no one else was. What makes you think you're too good for me now?

v. I hope that you know, I will always be here for you. You can talk to me about anything any time. Whether you need ears to listen, or arms to hold you. I will always be just a call away. Please don't ever forget that.

vi. I know that I am usually surrounded by people or I'm always communicating with someone. But that does not mean that I don't get lonely. I constantly feel alone. I feel as if I have nobody. Ever.

vii. Of course, this is life. You will get fucked over. And hurt. And you can't avoid getting your heart broken. But holding back isn't going to get you anywhere. Having hope in the darkest of times is what makes someone stronger. Hiding from life only makes your situation harder.

viii. I am thankful for the people who never left.

ix. I think that everyone should sit back and realize how beautiful and how precious life is. Life is awesome! Keep a positive mind about everything, that's all you can do. You can't let the simple things get you down in life. You have so much potential, you have so much to look forward to. Stay happy, and don't just exist... live.

  (via staypositive.me, 365thoughts, & words-you-never-heard)