Eden

24 he/they ☀️

[incorrect-potc-quotes]

Kidnapper: We have your child

Jack: I don’t have a child?

Kidnapper: Then who just asked for warm milk and made us cut the crusts off their sandwich?

Jack: Oh god, you have Will

[incorrect-potc-quotes]

Elizabeth, about Will: I could fix them, but honestly whatever the hell is wrong with them is way funnier.

Jack: That's what any god probably thinks about me.

[incorrect-potc-quotes]

Jack: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

James: I sleep with a knife.

Will: Both of you are pathetic.

Jack: Oh yeah? And what weapon do you sleep with, Mr. Badass?

Will: Elizabeth.

[everythingispirates]

I think the thing about jack and will's dynamic is that jack is a generally pretty bad person who doesn't like killing and will is a generally pretty okay person who fucking loves to kill

[west-beleriand]

gigolas connoisseurs need to allow gimli to be a bear AND a bottom. its ok guys shh shh its allowed. keeps gently shushing you. its ok. he can be a masc bottom they allow that these days

[cleverwordsandotherstuffilike]

There is a difference between a failure and a fiasco. A failure is merely the absence of success. Any fool can achieve failure. But a fiasco, a fiasco is a disaster of epic proportions. A fiasco is a folk tale told to others to make other people feel more alive because it didn’t happen to them. Drew Baylor

[tanoraqui]

(re: this post)

Broke:

Legolas: The world is flat

Gimli: What?

WOKE:

some random Man at a bar in Minas Tirith: Is it true that the world is flat for elves?

Legolas: What? No. The world is round. It USED to be flat, but then Aragorn’s ancestors fucked up so bad that it was turned round.

Gimli: What?!

Legolas: Shit, don’t tell Aragorn I said it like that. Don’t tell Elrond I said it like that! It’s just, the earthquakes knocked down some really great redwoods in the northwest—I never knew them, but my dad says they were very wise, and he still holds a bit of a grudge.

Gimli: I only have more questions now.

[eleneressea]

#join me in my ‘one time thranduil said the sinking of numenor was all the númenoreans fault and elrond furiously#cut off rivendell’s trade with mirkwood for nearly 600 years’ agenda @tanoraqui

I will happily join you in that agenda

[azurebones]

@streets-in-paradise @axelwolf8109

The father

The son

The drunk drama loving uncle

[modernincorrectlotrhobbit]

Aragorn: Okay, just remember, Legolas, flatter Gimli. Make him feel good. Don’t come on too strong.

[later]

Legolas: *knocks on Gimli’s door*

Gimli: Hello?

Legolas: I love you.

[modernincorrectlotrhobbit]

Aragorn: You're really bad with boundaries.

Legolas: Name one boundary I've crossed.

[earlier]

Legolas, picking Aragorn's front door lock with a hair clip: Hey, can I come in?

[nutmegs-tired]

We don't talk enough about how tragic Legolas' sea longing is

[emyn-arnens]

Gosh I just love book Legolas. He's immortal. He's a teenager. Elrond picks him instead of Glorfindel because he's average and won't draw attention to the Fellowship. He's the comic relief guy and resident Little Shit, but he can also shoot a Nazgul out of the sky in the pitch black like a one-man elf anti-aircraft defense system. He wants everyone to know that he's, like, really old. He forgets the task at hand because he wants to look at trees. His greatest qualities are that he can become friends with anyone and his loyalty is unending. He shows up to Valinor a century late with Starbucks in hand and his dwarf bestie at his side. Iconic.

[southfarthing]

FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR FARAMIR

[modernlotrhobbitthoughts]

LotR and Hobbit Characters + Tweets

[the-writing-warg]

Just in case my fellow lotr fans didn't know, there's 2 wild orcas in Iceland called Boromir and Faramir, and since they are often seen travelling closely together its possible they're brothers

Boromir

Faramir

Its worth mentioning there's also orcas called ulmo, angmar and aragorn that are seen around Iceland (idk if they were named because of lotr but theyre still technically lotr names so I'm counting it)

[annoyinglandmagazine]

I love the whole concept that all the mortals by the late third age have this idea of elves as these serene, calm, wise and peaceful beings. Like at the council of Elrond and the like they all see the elves as inherently great givers of advice with the bigger picture at heart. Imagine if someone from then read a book on the first age. Like Faramir being exposed to Elrond’s records after he leaves for Valinor and thinking are these really the same species? Why are they setting everything on fire? Was the founder of Numenor really raised by these people? Did the calm lord Elrond really hold a knife to that guys throat? They are all completely feral and bloodthirsty and possess no basic judgement skills. Frodo getting to Valinor and being invited to a party at Finrod’s house. Expecting a deep cryptic discussion on lore and feeling out of place among all these dignified ethereal legends. And like ten minutes in people are playing drinking games with knives and fire. Frodo expects Lord Elrond to be shocked at his relatives behaviour but finds him in a knife throwing competition with the former high king. He seems to be winning. He also sees what seems to be two high kings making out in the stairwell. His last hope is Galadriel whose now in an intense bar fight with three of her cousins. Her husband is cheering her on from the corner.

The elves are not actually inherently wise. They just made all the mistakes and learnt from them after about the fifth attempt.

[lady-arryn]

THE LORD OF THE RINGS costumes appreciation: ― Faramir’s ranger armour (costume design by Ngila Dickson and Richard Taylor)