Éomer: Hey, Éowyn, do have a moment to-? Éowyn: No, I’m very busy! Merry: Éowyn, Faramir is calling you! Éowyn, grabbing the phone: Faramir! Hi! Yes, we can go out! I’m free! Éomer: Are you kidding me?
sheepfilms
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
RMH
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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#extradirty
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Cosmic Funnies
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
taylor price
Show & Tell
NASA
AnasAbdin
cherry valley forever
Not today Justin
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

oozey mess
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JBB: An Artblog!

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@modernincorrectlotrhobbit
Éomer: Hey, Éowyn, do have a moment to-? Éowyn: No, I’m very busy! Merry: Éowyn, Faramir is calling you! Éowyn, grabbing the phone: Faramir! Hi! Yes, we can go out! I’m free! Éomer: Are you kidding me?
Merry: What time is it? Pippin: I don’t know. Pass me that saxophone and I’ll find out. Pippin: *blows sax loudly* Sam, from another room: WHO IS PLAYING THE SAX AT 2AM? Pippin: It’s 2am.
Smaug: You're too late! You'll never stop me now. Bilbo: That's where you're wrong, evil-doer! We will stop you with the powers of: Bofur: Friendship! Kili: Harmony! Thorin: Incredible violence. Fili: And love!
Fili: Kili and I failed our safety course today. Bilbo: What happened? Kili: Well, one of the questions was, “In the event of a fire, what steps would you take?” Bilbo: And? Fili: Apparently, “fucking large ones,” wasn’t the right answer.
Aragorn: Fill your body with cranberries so the horse that kills you gets a sensual surprise when he begins to feed. Gimli: Gimli: I will give the horse that kills me no such luxury.
Bilbo: If someone told me you murdered someone, I wouldn’t be too surprised, I think. Thorin, instantly: Has someone told you I did? Bilbo: N-no? Thorin, sitting back: Okay.
Frodo: I can't believe Gollum betrayed us again! Frodo: Why is it always the ones you most expect?
Mirkwood Guard: Ahh! A ghost! Legolas, running outside: There’s a ghost?? Bilbo, quickly pulling off the Ring: I’m not a ghost!! Legolas, raising his bow: I can fix that.
Barliman Butterbur: We actually have a chip reader now. Gandalf: Oh yeah? Gandalf, pulling a Dorito out of pocket: Hmmm. Barliman: It’s not going to work on that kind of ch- *Chip Reader*: ~Transaction completed.~
Bilbo: I think you owe me an apology. Thorin: I’LL APOLOGIZE TO YOU IN HELL. Bilbo: Thorin: Bilbo: Thorin: I don’t actually know what this is about. Sorry I took such a hard stance.
Dis: Kili, can you pass me the onions? Dis: I mean the carrots! No! The lettuce! No! The forks! No! The fridge! Fili: Do you mean the salt? Dis: …yes. Fili: Also, I'm not Kili.
Pippin, desperate for an excuse: Um, because....? Gandalf: Because you lack common sense? Pippin: Yes. NO!
Thranduil: Careful, Oakenshield. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry. Thorin: It’s courageous of you to imply that I would ever like you at all.
*ghost sound*
Legolas: Why’d you agree to this date?
Tauriel: My boyfriend died last year, so I’m just trying to get back into the dating scene, really.
Legolas: Damn, that’s sad.
Legolas: We should use a Ouija board to get his permission to smash.
Tauriel: What the fuck is wrong with you?
Thorin: It doesn't feel like Christmas.
Bilbo: Maybe we should listen to some Christmas music.
Thorin: That seems a little too Christmas-y.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYONE!! ❤️
Legolas: It’s almost time to switch from our regular weapons to our holiday weapons!
Aragorn: Is there a difference?
Gimli: Yes. The holiday ones light up!