YIKES

Mattie A consistent theme?? I don’t know her.

[slightmood]

whoever has my voodoo doll please put more stuffing in the ass

[turtlepowerriiise]

I don’t like this post

[slightmood]

I don’t like this ass

[glurg]

green and pink are best friends. society isnt ready for this though

[havingcompassion-deactivated202]

If I get at least one thing done in a day I’m a genius if I get two things done I’m a god

[diamondseaside]

thinking bout 2019 and how i took her for granted

[serotnin]

does anyone else like… not know what they want… at all

[spiderbasil]

i think more horror movies should be like midsommar not in plot or themes but in daylight so i can see what the fuck is happening

[borderlimes]

ok but do you understand how exhausting it is for me to never get a break from me

[softgrlfriend]

that’s enough emotions for a whole year. ciao

[write-fromthe-start-deactivated]

I hope Harry and Meghan name their daughter Diana so I can watch the monarchy collapse in real time.

[solardivulger]

*walks around my house looking for scissors while making a scissor motion with my fingers*

[thatbrunettebarbiedoll]

Be a bad bitch with a warm heart. It's not cute to be rude and disrespectful. You can be confident, have no tolerance for insults and still be gentle and kind to people who deserve it. This is the dream combination that needs to be mastered.

[yiffmaster]

this is the most surreal most 21st century sentence I’ve ever read

[mistomaxo]

noo

[tesladyneindustries]

how is angry birds collecting sexual orientation data? how do these birds know im gay

[goopy-amethyst-deactivated20250]

Bro they fuckin snitched on us 

[therebornofversaille]

The birds work for the bourgeoisie

[abeautiful-dream]

[zoja-deactivated20210116]

i’ve finally healed 🙌 no longer do i consume media 📵 now i consume only fruit 🍓🍈🍌🍇🥭 i know not of suffering. the pope wants what i have.

[hopeandatwodollarbill]

[elizabitchtaylor-deactivated202]

The original Eartha Kitt recording of Santa Baby is the only good version because she’s the only one that puts any kind of irony or humour into it. She understands that the song is about a gold-digger singing to her sugar daddy, telling him about all the gifts she wants and buttering him up by telling him how “good” she’s been to him. And flirtatiously comparing him to Santa because he’s an old man who gives her gifts when she sits on his lap. Every other singer does the song as though they’re actually trying to fuck Santa.

[cursed-and-haunted]

I know this is going to make me sound pretensions but I have to get it off my chest. I feel an unimaginable rage when someone posts a photo and is like "this picture looks like a renaissance painting lol" when the photo clearly has the lighting, colors and composition of a baroque or romantic painting. There are differences in these styles and those differences are important and labeling every "classical" looking painting as renaissance is annoying and upsetting to me. And anytime I come across one of those posts I have to put down my phone and go take a walk because they make me so mad

[cursed-and-haunted]

In case you're curious here's what I mean.

Renaissance(distinct lines, stability and the individual man):

Baroque (bold, chaotic, dramatic):

Romantic(romanticize the simple hard working life):

Do you see the difference?

[whitepeopletwitter]

[jewish-tutter]

someone explain the jewish holidays to me like i'm 5 years old

[rizaoftheowls]

Purim: They tried to kill us, we survived. Let’s tell the story, wear silly costumes, and get wasted. (Optional: have a carnival or a play!)

Passover: They enslaved us, God freed us. Remember this via a big ceremony/feast and then don’t eat bread for a week. This is a big one; you’re going to have to clean your house and host all your relatives.

Tu B'Shevat: It’s Earth Day, let’s eat some fruit.

Simchas Torah: We read the entire Torah every year, and we got to the end! Let’s have a dance party and then start all over again!

Tisha B'Av: They destroyed our temples. That sucked.

Rosh HaShanah: Happy New Year! It’s time to ask (and grant) forgiveness for the wrongs done in the past year, pledge to do better, and wish for a sweet new year. And go to synagogue for HOURS.

Yom Kippur: Rosh HaShanah’s somber counterpart. God decides on this day your fate for the next year. Repent your sins, hope for forgiveness, and fast. (And go to synagogue for HOURS.)

Yom HaShoah: Holocaust Remembrance Day.

Sukkot: Harvest festival! Sleep in a hut under the stars.

Shemini Atzeret: Man, I don’t even know?

Shavuot: God gave us the Torah! That was pretty nice of him.

Chanukah: They busted up our temple and tried to forcibly convert us. We responded with guerilla warfare. Let’s eat some fried food. Candles!

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

So basically the entire Jewish holiday calendar is giving the middle finger to death and high-fiving, with or without various combinations of prayer and foods.

[rizaoftheowls]

Yup. Or as we say, “They tried to kill us, we survived, let’s eat.”

[galaxy-of-great-possibilities]

thank you for the desc’s bcs they are beautiful and i am now educated

[above-d-clouds]

A handy table for everyone:

[cityglowing]

Y’all have no idea how happy it makes me to see my goyim followers reblogging this. Really. It means the world to me.

[flootzavut]

Okay that table is a work of art

[justanothermoonwalker]

Thank you for explaining so much!