— welcome to lavieenton —
multimuse blog for The Ton HQ
Genevieve de La Croix
Ceara Dempsey
Riya Das
about the author: lucky, 24, she/her/hers, central time, triggers: sexual assault and suicide
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@lavieenton
— welcome to lavieenton —
multimuse blog for The Ton HQ
Genevieve de La Croix
Ceara Dempsey
Riya Das
about the author: lucky, 24, she/her/hers, central time, triggers: sexual assault and suicide
Ceara folded her hands in front of her, listening as she always did when parents had their concerns. Her smile was gentle, understanding as it always was in these situations. "Sometimes, it is helpful to admit that some questions requre answers only she could find out, or others who are more proficient at answering accurately. That continues reinforcing the curiosity without diminishing her abilities."
Despite his apology, she did find herself letting out a soft laugh. "Please, no apologies are needed. I would rather you find humor in all of this rather than lose yourself in the stress, Mister Winchester." She quieted to continue listening to him, nodding her head subtly. Now, this was not something to laugh about. And given he wasn't anymore, she remained as serious as he did. But she could see he was an excellent father. Doting, caring. And he would not have gone to such lengths to hire her if his concern did not come from a true place.
Looking at the whiskey glass, Ceara was reluctant. At the moment, she was working. So, she shook her head and assured, "No, thank you. Whiskey does not bode well with me on an empty stomach. But Isabel is still in her formative years, luckily. Children her age are akin to sponges. If given the opportunity, she can thrive. But I will also admit that children love the opportunity to choose. I know you would like to protect her from London's expectations and performances, but Isabel can only have an opinion on those should she experience them. Either with other children and outings, or with you as her trusted aduly."
She bit the inside of her cheek before she continued. "You did the right thing coming to London when you did. You gave her an opportunity to grow with others and experience more of the world, which is all she needs. But that is not to say she cannot climb trees and scrape knees," Ceara reassured, smiling. "Offering both worlds will be the best for her, but taking one away will only make her more curious about it, especially when it was not previously accessible to her until now."
The glass of whiskey was halfway to his lips before his hand froze midair.
"Especially when it was not previously accessible to her until now."
Her words caused him to pause. He had entirely forgotten about the addition of wealthy families to the marriage mart. Instead of taking a sip, his glass returned to the mantle. There had been an urgent need to feel clear-headed.
"Of course... forgive me... I must sound obnoxiously privileged, and perhaps I am. Of course there are good things that come with being in high society. Despite its expectations, it has its perks." He paused, his hazel eyes searching hers. He found he wanted nothing more than to read her mind and experience what this world looked like through her eyes. Like a tutor who had been inside so many homes. And now, she might even be permitted to marry into such a family.
Enzo had painted many a portrait of wealthy women, of ballrooms and Hyde Park with its promenading debutantes. He had looked at it through the analytical eyes of a painter, and he had looked at it as a hunted man, expected to find love and a proper match in one person alone. Yet he had never looked at it as an outsider.
"How strange it must be, to finally be permitted not only to look behind the curtain, but to step through it. Please, help me see it with your eyes." He stepped forward and nodded toward the armchair across from where he was standing. The invitation hung in the air, and he would understand if she neither had the time nor the desire to accept it. "How do they treat you? The families of the ton? I cannot imagine every titled lord and lady giving you a very warm welcome."
His statement gave her pause. Ceara hadn't meant to sound as if she were discussing the privileges of society, merely the benefits it would have to Isabel. Though, her sharp mind understood the seamless switch and said, "You sound concerned, not privileged. And it is, quite so. I do not live in a world like this, not the way Isabel will, so I take no offense."
She felt his curiosity before she heard it in his request. The way his eyes, nearly matching hers in hue, narrowed in thought as he discarded the decorated glass he nursed. Taking a seat, she placed her hands in her lap and gnawed on her lower lip as she considered her treatment since arriving in Mayfair. "Well, most of my pupil's parents are quite kind. Other families have been rather neutral."
Her thoughts settled on Dominic, Frederic, and Edgar. Three different souls with three different methods of exposing themselves to Mayfair. Duty, silence, and care. It was peculiar, but the other two had treated her well. But Dominic made it clear this world wasn't for her, and it was the first time in a while that she took heed to his words. "I think the families of the Ton are curious of newcomers, which makes them kinder and more open to us. But, no. Not every titled individual has been warm or welcoming."
Ceara wrung her fingers, swallowing thickly. "If I am to be frank, I am not someone who wishes to step through the curtain. I do feel an amount of luck and gratitude being able to work with some of the famillies here. But the concept of titles, ladies, lords and the like, it is all rather daunting. I have no experience in courtly affairs or knowing how to dance the latest steps, and...despite their kindness, I do believe the families here are aware of such things. Is this too personal or...too honest?"
“Hm,” Ceara hummed, feigning thought. “He cannot refuse when there are *ducks* involved. I mean, it is only right to give them a lovely home should they decide to be in your care.” Despite her play at seriousness, her smile was wide and mischievous. And what great care she was sure they would be in, but she left that part out.
The act of Nora’s elated claps brought a gradual smile to Ceara’s face. It was an interesting sight to see, but to know that her new friend was happy by the prospect of platonic companionship encompassed her in a comfortable joy she wasn’t used to. It was carefree and gentle, perhaps how sisterhood should have truly been. “I doubt you could be considered a burden. You would not have free access to my home were that truly the case,” she said, a playful scold shrouded in truth.
It did not entirely surprise her that Nora wasn’t aware of Frederic personally. Ceara didn’t know many people yet, and she had been in Mayfair for a while. “He’s quite kind once you speak to him,” she said, nibbling at the corner of a piece of cheese from their shared snack tray. “In fact, I believe he should be going to the fair, you could meet him there. If you are going, that is?”
She secretly hoped so. She would love to accompany a friend to something as grand as a fair, something she never gave herself the opportunity to enjoy.
a laugh falls easily from her lips as she thinks of her father, a man of seriousness and practicality chasing a family of ducks around the gardens of their mayfair home - she is sure he would slip and end up in the pond, weeds and lilypads creating a rather fetching ensemble for the brother to the duke of marlborough.
it was freeing to feel elation, to feel companionship without payment, to have a friend she could call her kindred spirit - ceara reminds her of charlotte, a soul linked to her own through ties unseen but ever present. "my father has always said to check, i do not wish to become a nuisance to someone i would like to become good friends with, ceara - but please do tell me if i do, or if you need your space! i am sure i can pass time with the ducks, should i need to." nuisance. it was engraved on her heart, a term her mother-in-law once deemed her new name within the mayenne estate - you are worthless, a gnat needing to be swatter, little nuisance nora.
"i do hope he is, i wish to get on his good side as i have edgar's," her smile turns bashful. she saw edgar as a brother, a shoulder to lean on should she need it, and whilst she does not expect that from frederic, she does wish to live her life as dominic's wife with some form of amicable relationships of his family. "i should be attending, i am quite fond of carousels, the painted horses are marvelous!"
tapping her fingers against the table, leonora's smile turns bright and she places a hand over ceara's. "we should go, together that is!"
Nuisance.
Ceara thought the word being assigned to Nora was odd, foreign. She was a gentle soul, someone who deserved a time and place to be herself, to just be a woman enjoying the world and not something to be captured, sold off, examined. Who would deem this woman as a nuisance?
"I do not intend you think of you as a nuisance, Nora," she assured, her smile gentle. "You're a friend of mine. Mosquitoes are nuisances, you are a person welcomed into my home, whenever you please. You have my word." Just as with Frederic, a protectiveness flared in her heart. Should anyone speak poorly of Nora, she would meet them with fire and sharp points. This was her friend, a wonderful one, and she would not feel inconvenient here.
The mention of Edgar caused her to brighten. "Edgar is wonderful. Frederic is enduring much. Just be patient with him, and he will warm up to you," Ceara mused. Although, she could not guarantee that Frederic would be kind, as he drew his own path.
When the other woman confirmed she was attending, she perked up. The heaviness that weighed on her heart lightened to that of a feather. Friendship was healing, having a friend to simply enjoy was healing. And the makings of healing soothed her tattered soul. "Yes, I would love to! I've only ridden the painted horses twice back in Ireland. I would love to see about them with you. And perhaps, an apple tart or two. God, I heard the apple tarts here are magnificent, especially at the fair."
“You do not have to lie about me butchering your language just because you are happy,” she half-teased, her laugh light and airy to keep the tears at from properly spilling. But knowing he felt something meant everything. Did he feel loved by her? It was a constant thought in her mind, even when they were apart. Seeing how moved he was by her gift forced a heavy weight to settle in her heart, though. Genevieve longed for it to be light, but with the looming lie hanging over their heads, the brightness of his joy and vulnerability allowed the guilt to fester into this ugly, unmoving mass. The gift was as much an ‘I love you’ as it was a goodbye. She feared saying goodbye to him, but she knew what would happen when he discovered who she was. He would deem the entire ordeal void, and she would never see him again. Marry a sweet woman as beautiful as him, continue the O’Connor line with children he would adore. For a split second, the thought weighed on her mind until his touch cut through the doubts and insecurities.
Genevieve had taken her time in fastening the cufflinks, simply because it gave her a reason to continue touching him and be impossibly close. It was as close to kissing him as she would get this evening. Especially with William nearby ensuring there would be no impromptu ravishing. His French made her pause and look up at him through her lashes, her smile bashful. Easily, she replied, “Tout le plaisir est pour moi, mon amour.” For that moment, she could have sworn this was heaven and the backdrop acted as his halo. The sounds of the fair bled into nothing but muffled background noise, functioning as the orchestra to whatever this was between them.
The booming voice forced a startled jump out of her, head whipping in that direction before looking back at Edgar. Her expression shifted in silent question before it dawned on her that he might want to participate. “Oh, my,” she sighed with a smile, taking his arm again and sidling up to him as they strode towards the commotion. Now louder, a man in a rather cheap suit called out, “Step right up! Participate in our annual tug-of-war with the strongest arms in Mayfair! Prize given to the victors! But what will that prize *be*? A free morsel? A shiny trinket for a lovely someone? Or—”
The man’s thick, unruly brows lifted when his eyes stopped on Genevieve. And his face brightened, an idea sparking. “Or a chance at courting a very beautiful someone! Someone like this!” He shot out his hand as he gestured to Genevieve and Edgar’s coupling.
Her smile faded and she let out a nervous laugh, fingers gripping at Edgar’s sleeve like they had before. But this time, she wanted to damn near disappear into herself—or him—and pretend they were never here. “I mean, I suppose,” she half-reasoned, looking to Edgar almost helplessly.
But nearby, a group of men spoke quietly between themselves, their eyes fixed on the princess and her fair partner.
Edgar felt it before he understood it; the way her fingers tightened at his sleeve, the small nervous laugh that did not belong to her joy, the sudden wish in her body to become smaller beside him. The man's arm swept toward her as though she were another bauble hanging from a stall. "Here is," the showman boomed, delighted by his own invention, "a chance to win the favour of a very beautiful lady." The crowd laughed. Edgar did not. Something cold and very quiet moved through him. He covered Genevieve's hand with his own, not to hold her back, but to steady her. His other hand had already gone to his coat pocket where a purse of coins sat heavy enough to end this foolishness before it gathered speed. "I think," Edgar said, voice smooth enough to be dangerous, "you will find coin a more suitable prize than- "
"Oh, come now!" one of the men by the rope shouted. "Let the gentleman earn her admiration properly." The stupid prick seemed like he was intent on challenging Edgar. "Aye," another laughed. "If he's so attached to her sleeve, let him pull for it." The showman brightened. "There we are! The lady's favour to the victor!" Edgar looked at the rope, the laughing men, the hungry faces of the crowd. He could refuse, he could shame them, and he could throw the purse at their feet and tell them to purchase manners. But that would only keep their eyes on Genevieve.
Edgar forced a smile. "My lady's favour is not a prize to be handed out by shouting men," he said clearly. "But if the question is whether I am willing to humiliate myself for her amusement- " He looked down at Genevieve, and only then did the smile soften. "That has already been well established." William made a faint noise. "Sir- " Edgar shrugged out of his coat. "Hold this, Will." William accepted it with grave despair. Edgar rolled his sleeves to his forearms, the golden cufflinks flashing briefly in the lanternlight. Her gift. Her thought. Her hands had put them there. For her, then. If he was to make a fool of himself, he would do it properly, for her.
He took his place at the rope among men broader than him, and flushed with drink. The hemp bit into his palms. Mud clung to his boots. Across from him, the opposing team dug in with smug confidence. The showman shouted. The rope snapped taut. For one glorious moment, Edgar held. His shoulders burned, his heels carved into the earth, and somewhere in the roar of the crowd he thought of Genevieve watching him. So he pulled harder. Unfortunately, almost heroic was not the same as victorious. The other team surged. Edgar's boots slid. The line lurched, a man beside him cursed, and the rope tore through his hands. Then he went down. Flat into the fairground muck. The winning side erupted in cheers while Edgar lay still for half a breath, staring up at the smoky lantern-lit sky. Well... that had gone badly.
Genevieve would have paid attention to the men and their insistence, to the way fear licked up her spine despite a favor only being a measly scrap of fabric or a kiss upon one's cheek. But something told her that not all men held favors from a young woman in such a simplistic regard. And they outnumbered her tenfold. Was she obligated to offer her favour to every single one of them?
But all of that faded as her eyes remained fixed on Edgar. The set of his jaw, the subtle fierce glint in his eyes. The hitch in her breath was subtle but not something she could explain away either. Words were beyond them, and a simple shift here or a tug there told both of them what the other wanted to know. My lady, he had said. A warmth bloomed in her stomach and were it not for her anxiety, she would have been smiling. She was his lady for the evening. His chosen person to attend the fair with, and the claiming of such was exhilirating.
"Edgar--"
For once, Genevieve was supportive of William's hesitance, concerned about Edgar's impulses. She reached a hand to try tugging him back, but it was no use. It was not lost on her that his forearms were on display, strong and certain with a dusting of hair. It hardly held a candle to what she saw during her first visit, but she wouldn't be picky about the sight of his comfort. Or, undressing for a battle he planned to fight like hell in.
The next series of events happened as quickly as the decision was made. Her eyes never left him. He was steadfast in his effort, muscles pulled taut beneath his dress shirt. There was a split second where she was sure he would win, but then...
SPLAT!
Genevieve let out a sharp gasp, covering her mouth. Perhaps it appeared more painful than it was, but the embarrassment likely overshadowed any pain settling in his bones. Ignoring the cacophony of the winning sides' glory, she hurried over and leaned over him. "Are you alright? Oh, mon amour…"
She brushed some strands of his hair back. Despite her worries, the movement was tender, careful. As if he were made of porcelain, and she was sharp enough to crack him. Then, she offered the same hand to help him up.
|| closed starter || @edgaroconnor || Edgar
|| LOCATION || St. James Park, grassy area
The walk back home was a quiet one. The crickets chirped, people passing in excitable whispers. But she floated the streets of Mayfair like a ghost, lost in time and heartache to someone who saw right through her. The kiss with Kitty hadn’t been a mistake, but it didn’t quell her pain either. In fact, it only made her feel worse. Had she been using her? Had Kitty been using her as well, given her father’s recent death? And what did this mean for her school’s funding? Dominic had rescinded his offer once Mary became involved, and he was of no help now that she’d done what she had.
Edgar had left the tavern before the hour grew dangerous. That was how he thought of it now. Not late; dangerous. There came a point in the evening when ink stopped being ink and became an excuse to remain seated. When the candle burned low, the air thickened with smoke, and the laughter around him began to sound like an invitation rather than just noise. He had written three pages, crossed out two, and abandoned a fourth halfway through when he realised he had been staring at the same sentence for nearly ten minutes. So he gathered his papers, paid for nothing stronger than tea, and stepped back into the damp London night.
St. James's Park lay between him and home like a dark breath. Wet grass, restless trees, the shimmer of lamplight on puddled paths. Edgar walked with his notebook tucked beneath his arm, his collar turned up, already composing and discarding lines in his head. Then he saw her. At first, she was only a pale shape moving through the grass where no lady ought to be walking alone at such an hour. Barefoot. Hair undone. Dress damp at the hem. Edgar slowed. "Ceara?" The question left him softly, but the sight of her struck hard. Her eyes were swollen from tears, her face blotched with them, her hair clinging in dark tangles where it had escaped every pin.
'Tá áthas orm tú a fheiceáil'. Something in his chest pulled tight. He lowered himself beside her almost at once, not too close, not trapping her in the space between them. His notebook slipped from beneath his arm onto the grass, forgotten. "Táim anseo," he said quietly. 'I'm here'. He did not ask what had happened. Not yet. A question could be a hook, and she looked already caught on too many sharp things. Instead, he shrugged out of his coat and settled it carefully around her shoulders, giving her time to pull away if she wished. When she did not, he drew it a little closer at the front, shielding her from the damp and from the curious eyes of anyone passing along the path. "You're cold," he said, because it was easier than saying you are breaking my heart. He hesitated, not pressing, only offering. "There's a theatre just beyond the park," he added gently, as though the idea had only just occurred to him. "It's warm."
The cold hadn't bit at her the way it normally would. Ceara hardly noticed. In reality, she didn't notice much as of late. Beneath his gentle concerns and attempt to warm her cold skin, she was muttering a lullaby in Irish. Something nonsensical that her mother sang to her and her sister. The words didn't matter, as long they weren't in English. Trembling hands came up to hug the coat closer to her chest, as if the fabric would protect from whatever force was coming at her.
Exhaling a shaky breath, Ceara gave a stilted nod. Warm sounded good. It sounded nice, comforting. But she had wondered if she deserved warmth and goodness. Did she deserve his help? She had been set on ruining his brother's life, after all. The least she could do was avoid him. "Warm," she repeated, voice impercetably soft. She looked at him and stared for a long moment. Not to judge or assess, just take comfort in the familiarity of him. Of how he reminded her of home. Of the creek by her parents' house where she swam most summers. Of the thick leather seat in her father's study where he fell asleep many nights.
Still keeping a firm grip on the coat, Ceara stood on shaky legs to head to the theatre. Grass stains soaked through her nightgown, half aware of the fact that she had even left the cottage in such a state. Thank goodness for Edgar and his thick coat. "You were writing," she said, a statement more than a question. But it left an open air for him to tell her, should he want to. She had much to tell, though silence was preferable in this state.
Hearing the familiar voice made her turn, grinning at the sight of her brother. Since meeting Charlotte, the world was bathed in a glow akin to the opera singer's metaphorical halo. "Brother, I'm glad you're here," Riya chirped, easily falling into step beside him. They both had been occupied as of late, especially with her having been touring more of Mayfair and spending her allotted time with Lottie. She just barely made it home for supper, though she constantly wore a dreamy smile.
However, her lips turned downward as he spoke. Oh, Nalan. Always the businessman, even during times of leisure. Folding her hands in front of her, Riya slowed her steps by a fraction and sighed. "Sir Linton, you say? I mean, I've heard he is kind. Does he like to travel, at least? You know I cannot just remain settled in one place for long."
She knew it was a stretch to ask such a question. Most men here would prefer to travel farthest to the countryside, as requiring a ship concerned funds, a crew, gear, packed goods. Her thoughts trailed back to Charlotte, as they had been of late. She would travel with Riya, travel the entire world if it suited them both.
There was much to be said about the Das family and yet beneath all of the scandals and drama (mostly all down to Nalan’s misdeeds), they were still a family and a united one at that, which is more than could be said for most of the families in London. Nalan Das could see it clear as day, they were all fracturing under the weight of the newcomers taking all they deemed was theirs, thriving in an environment they were not welcome in. “He has roots in England but it would be a fine match for you, he is need of children and once you provide that, you can travel as much or as little as possible but the point remains, he is a respectable man, from a respectable family and you have caught his eye.” There was no surprise that Nalan’s sisters would catch the eyes of anyone in England, they were both beautiful, rich and accomplished young women that could outshine any of the noble daughters of England and such a fact was reiterated by Nalan whenever he had the chance to do so organically. “I am sure he would like to travel Riya, but is such a thing a staunch requirement? Father intends for us to put our roots down here and I have tried to no avail. Now is your chance to do that, to help the family and carve out something for yourself with Sir Linton.”
Riya considered his words but they meant nothing to her. At least, she wished they meant nothing. She found Nalan's advice to be significant, helpful. He only wanted the best for her. He always had, even when they were children. And she wanted her older brother's help without the doubts creeping in.
"So, I'm to be a brooding mare for this man because I've caught his attention," she said, brows knitting into a deep frown. This was one of the primary issues with having returned to England with the marriage market in mind. They were so traditional, but it was past the turn of the century now. Things shouldn't remain as primitive as they were, and yet...
She sighed, his sentiments both aggravating and wearing her down. She didn't answer his question outright, at first. But that was better than throwing caution to the wind and admitting why she truly did not want to entertain Sir Linton. "Nalan, a marriage is not required to be in one place. Even if I agreed to court Sir Linton, who is to say he would even want that after what's happened? I would be ruined goods in his eyes, despite the money we still possess and his newfound interest in my face."
|| closed starter || @wonderxrings || Vitoria
|| LOCATION || The Bartholomew Fair Grounds
Edgar had yet to arrive. They had agreed to meet in a particular spot, so she traversed the fair grounds in the meantime. Genevieve parted from Charlotte earlier that day, so she strolled along the damp grass while crunching down on sugar-roasted almonds. The gentle breeze cooled her damp skin, and she wore a relaxed smile when she wasn't snacking. A fanfare of joyful noise filled her ears as the fair commenced.
That was until she lightly bumped into someone's side. She stumbled a bit, but kept a firm grip on her bag of goodies. With a slight grumble and a frown, she was about to snap at the person until Vitoria's face came into view. Genevieve's own face smoothed out and her expression softened. There was that strange tugging sensation at her mind again, set on figuring out why Vitoria was so familiar to her.
"Mrs. Bruce, I am so sorry," she said. "I did not intend to meet you in such a nonsensical manner. Did you see there was a fortune teller?"
Riya finally looked up, wary of Junho Lytton's presence before her. He was not intimidating--quite the opposite, truly--but she was unsure if she wanted to see him. Aera was a dear friend, and her brother should be as well. But the eldest Das girl was not in the mood for friendly affairs. She hadn't even gone to the lengths of speaking to Lottie yet out of sheer embarrassment.
"You may sit," she said, voice percetively softer than before. She subtly wiped a tear, not needing her emotions weaponized by anyone who would pass by. The silence between them wasn't tense, but there was no comfort present either. They were strangers, so what harm would silence offer?
But finally, Riya broke it. "I told him his impulses would land us somewhere here. In this pitch black nothingness of confusion and ruin," she began. "I told him, and just as Nalan does, he did not listen. He only heard his own ruminations, and ruined the family."
"I am sorry for it," she said. "For everything dealing with my brother. Truly."
Junho nodded, and he sat down when she gave permisson. He rested his elbow on the bench before he set his chin on the palm of his hand. He got to this point; he wasn't sure. He knew Aera was friends with Riya, but that it was not like he spent too often with the Das family members...his sister was rather brave compared to him.
"Your brother is something else..." he sighed. " I do not understand him. He goes on about me and my place..., but yet he's the one with disgrace to his name. I don't have such things." He then lets his eyes flutter over to her.
"You don't need to say sorry- you aren't him. To be honest, he has ruined his own name, but i don't think the Das name." He promised her. "You can make it better; clearly, just do whatever your brother isn't doing...do not let your brother's foolishness ruin everything for you"
Disappointed was the best way to put her feelings. The Nalan she had known her entire life was full of mischief, but knew when to pause on the notion. Nalan as he was now was unrecognizable to her. He was greedy, self-centered, judgmental. Thinking of her own brother that way, of the first person she looked up to with admiration, forced a painful throb from her chest. He was her only brother, she used to think the world of him. And now that his transgressions had ruined their family’s name and Kavika’s chances at a proper suitor, she was unsure what to think of him.
“He’s lashing out because he’s scared,” Riya said, smoothing her hands along her dress skirt to dry her damp palms and soothe herself. “And perhaps envious, though neither of those are an excuse for his behavior. You did not deserve his judgment.” Suddenly, coming to England was one of the worst decisions she’d made.
His words made her look at him again. It was so strange, like seeing Aera in an entirely new person. She heard that twins were just one soul placed into two people, and she found some truth in that. The Lytton siblings were as wise as they were beautiful, and Riya was grateful to be in their sphere. “You truly think so? That I can better the family name? People will hardly look our way, whether together or separate. All they see is the ruinous family that pissed all over a title.”
Despite this being their first meeting, Ceara could not help but be pulled towards him. And in some strange twist of fate, she felt just the same. He looked to her as if she had spun gold from all the mistakes he made, though she did not feel she deserved such a look. Even considering how she arrived to London, it was under the guise of a farce, but one she couldn’t help but feel proud of, even in her darkest moment.
However, her thoughts escaped as quickly as they’d come seeing his hand reach towards her. At first, she wondered if she were mistaken. Surely this stranger wasn’t bold enough to touch her outright. But alas, his gloved fingers still hovered near. Instinctively, she leaned backwards until even he caught himself.
She was still skeptical, taking him in as he did her. Unfamiliar to her, but so familiar to him, and yet she could not place why on his behalf. But she made no effort to force his leave. In fact, the musk of leather and expensive perfumes that clung to him was a strange comfort. A delight as lovely as it was rare to experience.
His words struck a chord in Ceara. “We,” she repeated almost imperceptibly. She’d never been part of a ‘we’ in such a regard. “It is not the gossip writer that plagues my mind so heavily, though her mentioning me did not help, either. But I assure you, the authorities would do no good, even if they could somehow find her.”
Looking down at his hand, she hesitated. Her stomach clenched. Was she making a deal with the devil or her savior? She didn’t know, but she extended her hand to shake his gloved one. “Ceara Dempsey,” she introduced shyly for once, brows still furrowed from vague unease. Not from his presence exactly, but from the situation itself.
“Why are you so eager to help me, Niccolo? We’ve only just met and you’ve no reason to help me with anything,” Ceara noted with a tilt of her head. With reluctance, she released his hand and placed hers back in her lap. Did he want something from her? There was only so much money she had, and she didn’t give out anything else, unless he sought educational services or unsolicited advice.
Who in the nine circles of Hell was Lady Whistledown, and by what rite was one expected to cast her out?
The magistrates had failed to find her, that much was plain; yet surely there must remain some earthly hand capable of reaching where theirs had not. It defied reason that one soul should carry so dreadful a harvest of knowledge. Was she some priest concealed beneath a woman’s skirts, gathering sins beneath the sacred veil of confession only to loose them upon the world? Or a servant drifting from house to house, sweeping hearths whilst collecting the whispered frailties of those foolish enough to mistake silence for solitude? Perhaps he ought to write to His Holiness himself and—
His thoughts broke apart as her fingers met his. Niccolò returned the gesture almost absently, willing the crease between his brows to disappear before she noticed it. Had he already come too late? The dreams had begun with his vengeance, but perhaps they had never been about revenge alone. Perhaps they had been a summons. Ought he to have sought her sooner, before despair had rooted itself so deeply that she regarded every offered kindness as one more delusion? And how was he to rescue a woman who looked upon him as though madness had already claimed him, when he himself scarcely felt sane? He could not have explained the conviction burning within him had his own salvation depended upon it. Some obscure decree, spoken by no earthly voice, insisted that her soul had wandered too near the precipice, and that his own would know no peace whilst he left it there.
“Hm?” The simple question struck him with all the force of a confession demanded. “Oh… you see, Miss Dempsey, I wish to help you because…”
Because I have watched you suffer in dreams more vivid than memory. Because I was taught from infancy that no soul is beyond redemption. Because I believe the heavens have placed your grief in my path to weigh against my own sins.
Every truth sounded more deranged than the last.
“…because you remind me of my mother.”
The falsehood tasted bitter enough to linger. His poor mother—rest her gentle soul—would surely have crossed herself in Heaven at such shameless use of her memory. She had possessed hair pale as wheat and eyes clear as a summer sky, leaving him little save the bridge of her nose and that troublesome conscience which refused to let him sleep. Miss Dempsey resembled her in nothing. She belonged instead to the old fairytales whispered beside winter hearths, with darkness gathered in her hair and eyes deep enough to hide every sorrow that had ever sought refuge within them.
“I lost her not long ago,” he continued quietly. “Forgive me if I seem… overzealous. I have found that grief, if left to itself, grows ambitious. It devours every room in the house until one scarcely remembers how the place appeared before mourning entered. I thought…” He offered a faint, weary smile. “I thought perhaps that in easing yours, I might persuade my own to loosen its hold upon me.”
It was a lie, yet was every lie born equally sinful? If a physician sweetened bitter medicine with honey, was the cure diminished by the deception? If falsehood became the narrow bridge by which another escaped despair, perhaps Heaven, in all its inscrutable wisdom, might condemn the words whilst pardoning the intention. He could endure the stain upon his own conscience if it meant sparing hers another wound.
His soul, after all, was already burdened enough to carry one more.
“Do not mistake me for an opportunist,” he said gently, lifting his hands as though surrendering before an unseen judge. “I seek nothing from you. No obligation, no repayment. Only…” His voice softened until it was scarcely louder than the passing crowd beyond the window. “Only allow me to stand beside you awhile. Sorrow is a cruel companion when it walks alone.”
He leaned forward, resting his temple lightly against his hand, his gaze never straying from hers.
“Will you permit a poor sinner the privilege of listening?” he asked. “There are burdens that grow no lighter for being borne in silence. Sometimes all they require is another pair of shoulders, however unworthy, to keep them from crushing the heart entirely.”
This man was an anomaly. Not quite human, but not quite inhuman either. He was an almalgamation of the two. Someone in need of reassurance of a mysterious kind, and while he was off-putting, Ceara was willing to offer him what he needed. She did not consider herself a saving grace, but he looked at her as if she was one of the archangels themselves.
There was nothing else behind that stare. Not lingering lust, underlying manipulations. He wanted to assist her in exchange for nothing, and the concept itself was rare in the cutthroat worrld they found themselves in. But she had more questions than she was willing to accept answers upon his admission. A man had never told her she reminded them of their mother, so her concern only grew tenfold.
As he explained himself, her eyes remained on him. Ceara inhaled subtly, catching the rich scent of sandalwood and tobacco rolling from him in every shift he madee. The peculiar thing about him was that he had a stillness about him that bordered ghostly. If they weren't in the bookstore, she would be convinced he was an apparition coming to haunt her after many sleepless nights.
"You want to do good with your grief instead of seeking destruction," she realized, putting it mildly. It was an admirable task to set upon oneself, but one that came with its own grievances. If he set himself out to ease her stressors, who would relieve him of his own? Why extend such an offer without something in exchange for it? It was harmful, in a sense. But she did not know this man, the way his mind unraveled knotted thoughts.
Ceara fell into a silence with him, his question hanging in the air. This man, in all of his glory, wanted to help her. She would gather for his own ambitions, but there were no ambitions behind this plan, aside from raising her spirits, easing her demons.
She reached out and reluctantly brought one of his hands into both of hers. Her fingers brushed along the leather covering it, letting his words seep into her before she spoke, coming up with an idea. If salvation was what he sought, salvation is what she would offer to the poor sinner of a man. He was at her beck and call, and she wanted to help him as much as he was eager to help her.
"Do you swim, Niccolo?"
"Perhaps another time," she murmured after a moment's hesitation. Ceara hadn't known Kitty long, but the grief rolled off her in waves and the sight was foreign. She wanted to make it better. But how could she make *this* any better? There was no way to bring Lord Thorne back, and there was no way to remove the young woman's pain. For once, Ceara felt entirely helpless.
The softness of her voice was not becoming of Katherine. She was perky, bright. And to see her light dimmed to a near flicker, to a whisper of words. She missed that light, wished to seek it out. "You need not thank me," Ceara assured, properly cupping her face with both hands now. It was a careful, caring gesture. As if cradling her face could protect her from the world, from her pain. But grief was nothing like that. It was sharp and precise, a knife to the heart when one least expected so.
Her whisper, as fleeting as the wind, settled in Ceara's heart. She knew what would happen next, and yet her cheeks flushed at the thought. She liked Kitty, found her beautiful. And despite their previous disagreement, her attraction hadn't faded. Not by a long shot. Her own eyes flickered to her lips, soft and pouty, and without realizing it, she leaned in until their lips slanted in a soft kiss.
Katherine had originally appeared at Ceara's house for many reasons. One was to give her the flowers she had gotten from Liliana's, and another was that she simply could not be alone. She wanted desperately to just be with someone, but she worried she was practically suffocating her mother by being at her side all the time. She deserved to grieve as well. And Bertie had been busy helping Tobias. So the next person she thought of was Ceara, which perhaps could be looked into later. For now, she just wanted to be there with her.
Ceara's soft hands cupped her face and Kitty's face softened at the touch. Intimacy with women was still so new to her, thankfully Liliana had been helping her learn more about it, and she quite enjoyed Ceara's gentle touch. It was just such a foreign feeling, even if her stomach fluttered.
Their lips touched and Kitty's body shuddered in delight. Her lips were so soft, just as soft as she imagined it. It felt so lovely, and she didn't want to stop. Her lips slowly moved against the other's, and Kitty smiled for the first time in days since the announcement of Lord Thorne's death.
Everything in Ceara's mind quieted. There were no thoughts of Dominic or her school or her friendship with Leonora. All that she concerned herself with was tilting her head carefully to deepen their initial kiss, offering something more for Kitty than a simple peck. It was gentle and there were no other present intentions there aside from chasing the strange fluttering in her heart the longer they kissed.
The flowers made sense, the plea to be good. Although, she was unsure if she was deserving of the flowers. Especially not now, not when Kitty and her family were warranted flowers more. Ceara's problems were trivial now, merely surface level compared to the tragedy of Lord Thorne. But a creeping doubt seeped into her mind. Was she taking advantage of the situation by kissing her? She had come to her, but she hadn't requested a kiss from the tutor.
Slowly, Ceara parted from Kitty and stared at her, breathing uneven as it intermingled with hers. Her thumb brushed along her cheekbone, brows furrowed. It was as if she was assessing but the vulnerability remained. "I am so sorry. I...I shouldn't have done that."
|| closed starter || @calins-et-bisous || Charlotte
|| LOCATION || The Bartholomew Fair Grounds
Genevieve was waiting in line to retrieve a caramel apple for her and Edgar to share. She held the velvet box designated for him in one hand, thumbing along the plush texture to soothe her nerves. When he told her his birthday, she was inclined to gift him with something. A simple thing, but one that he could call his own.
As she glanced about and let the sound of joyous shouting and children's giggles swallow her thoughts, she spotted a head of blonde curls in front of her. Her clothing was entirely unfamiliar to the likes of Mayfair. But it was the fluid French she spoke, and recognition sprang to her.
With more confidence than she meant, Genevieve tapped the young woman on the shoulder. "Charlotte Lebelle? Is that you?" She hadn't seen her since she left right before Ginnie's own departure, and she had missed her talented friend dearly.
When she was able to see her face, the princess beamed with delight. "Lottie! It is you! C'est là que tu avais disparu!"
Charlotte had arrived at the fair early, she was planning on seeing Riya and riding the ferris wheel with her. The idea made her stomach flutter with excitement. It was such a romantic spot, and she found herself smiling at the thought of perhaps kissing her at the very top.
There was a cart selling caramel apples and other snacks, and Lottie was drawn to it. One thing about her was she had a sweet tooth, and she saw the vendor had her favorite dessert from back home- macarons! She ordered a few for her and Riya to share, and learned that the vendor had lived in Paris for a little bit as well. So she had a brief conversation with him in French, her smile bright and sweet as it always was. As she was going to turn away, there was a tap to her shoulder and her eyes widened seeing Genevieve de la Croix standing before her.
"Ginnie!" Lottie gasped as a smile overcame her. It had been so long since she saw the princess. "Je suis là, et vous aussi!*" She chuckled, moving a little to the side so they could speak. "Que faites-vous ici?** Please, allow me to buy you a treat and then we must walk and talk!"
Translation: *I am here, and so are you!
**What are you doing here?
Genevieve let out a squeal of delight, being taken back to the simplicities of girlhood. Before she agreed to any purchased treats or catching up, she pulled Lottie into a tight embrace. There was something about being able to see someone from France--speak to them, touch them to ensure they were real--was a comfort and a delight. And seeing Charlotte again after their last interaction so long ago, it was a relief knowing she was living life, not simply surviving.
Finally releasing her, she admitted, "I am here to keep things in line for the season. Queen Eleanor insisted I come, and, well, me voici*!" She laughed, a bright and cheerful sound. She took the time to take in Lottie, memorizing her as she was in front of her. Smiling, happy, healthy. Her friend was thriving, and her heart pounded against her ribs seeing that previous wish come to fruition. "How have you been doing? Tu chantes toujours, n'est-ce pas**?"
Genevieve began walking beside her, approaching the sugared almond and sugared walnut stall. The scent of warm butter, sugar, and roasted nuts wafted in the air. Caramel apples could wait for a moment. Edgar hadn't arrived yet, so she had much time to give to Charlotte.
*translation: here I am!
**translation: You're still singing, aren't you?
As thankful as she had been for William's presence, Genevieve forgot about his existence entirely in the moment. There it was again: that impenetrable bubble where the world no longer mattered, and it was only made up of them and their racing hearts. She wanted to love him, and she wanted him all to herself. It was selfish, immature even. But she would rather be those things knowing Edgar was as in love with her as she was with him.
She did not think much of the implications when she bit into the sugary morsel. The crunch, the sour, the gooey sweetness. It was the perfect bite, and she hummed in approval when he asked her opinion on it. Genevieve's realization of his feelings came in measured steps. The heat in his gaze, the shift in tone, the way his fingers clutched the wooden stick keeping his treat upright. Oh. It seemed she struck a nerve. There should have been regret or embarrassment seeping through her bones, followed by bashful apologies. Instead, pride swelled in her chest. "Good," she finally said, licking her lips of the residual caramel. This time, it might have been intentional.
When he took the pouch, Genevieve forced her hand to her side despite the brief touch. It had been becoming increasingly difficult to keep her hands to herself around him. And based on the way his hands clenched and reached into nothingness around her, he must have shared those sentiments. His observation touched a quiet place in her mind, in that terrible thing pounding against her ribs. "I could not risk losing it," she whispered, allowing a gentle smile to break through again. I could not risk losing you, she wanted to say. But she hadn't. Not yet.
As the gift was revealed to him, she kept her gaze directly on his face. And to see the glistening in his eyes, it both broke and mended her heart. It was not the reaction she anticipated, but his appreciation was evident. "You're a bright light in my life, Edgar," she cooed. "And, well, when I think of you, I think of warmth and happiness. Like the sun."
For once, Genevieve was not poignant and elegant. She was a woman in love, and she wanted her feelings for him heard. His admission brought tears to her eyes as well, but she blinked them away as if daring them to break through. She nodded her head with a quickness and stepped a bit closer, plucking a cufflink from his warm palm to secure properly. "I did not intend to bring tears to your eyes, but I am glad to know you feel appreciated," she murmured, flickering between her careful fingers to his face. Then, she twisted her mouth and tried something between nervous, breathy laughs. "Lá...breithe, yes breithe...shona duit."
Genevieve de la Croix, with sugar on her lips and mischief in her eyes, was going to be the death of him. Edgar saw the moment her tongue swept over her lip. A small thing. It should not have had the power to unmake him. And yet, it was there; the soft glisten of caramel disappearing from her mouth and the faint curve of satisfaction in her expression. Heat struck through him so quickly that for a moment he forgot the apple in his hand, forgot the footman standing near enough to witness his downfall, forgot the whole bright fair. His knees buckled under him, and his heart gave one hard, reckless beat against his ribs. Then another. He forced his gaze away from her mouth, but the image remained, bright and ruinous, long after he looked elsewhere.
The Irish reached him before the meaning did. Not because he failed to understand it. He knew those words better than his own name. He had heard them at school, at breakfast tables, shouted down corridors by Frederic, sung softly by Edith when she thought no one was listening, though not enough times. They belonged to home. To childhood. To all the hidden, tender places in him London never quite managed to reach. But in Genevieve's mouth, careful and uncertain and offered with such trembling sincerity, they became something else entirely. Edgar stared at her. The fair moved around them in a blur of lanterns and voices, but he heard almost nothing. There was only Genevieve, standing before him with gold in her fingers, tears bravely held back in her eyes, trying to wish him happiness in the language of his heart. The brightness in his own eyes grew impossible to hide. A small, unsteady laugh left him, softer than breath. "You said it beautifully," he murmured. His voice nearly failed him on the last word.
He looked down as she fastened the cufflinks. Her fingers moved carefully at his wrist, adjusting the linen, guiding the little golden sun through its proper place. It should have been an ordinary gesture. A lady assisting with a birthday gift. Nothing more. Instead, it felt devastatingly intimate. Her hands were so gentle. So intent. As though this small act mattered; as though he mattered. Edgar watched the bent crown of her head, the concentration in her face, the way the lanternlight caught in hr hair and turned the moment almost unreal. 'A bright light in her life'. 'Warmth and happiness'. 'Like the sun'. No one had ever said such a thing to him. People called him charming, reckless, amusing, a disgrace when they were in a foul enough mood. But Genevieve looked at him and saw light. The thought struck something in him so tenderly that his breath shuddered. "I do feel appreciated," he said quietly. "More than that, I think." He did not know how to explain it. What was he meant to do with the knowledge that she had searched for something worthy of him? That she had carried it close to her heart? That she had learned Irish for him, not because it was useful or fashionable, but because it was his?
His free hand lifted, then hesitated, suspended between them. There were too many people. Too much light. Too much world. So he only touched her hand once she finished, his fingers folding gently over hers at his wrist. "Thank you," he said, then swallowed, and tried again in the language she had given back to him. "Merci, mon amour." The endearment slipped out before he could stop it. His face warmed, but he did not take it back. For one suspended moment, the fair seemed to leave them alone. Then a voice boomed over the crowd. "Ladies and gentlemen! Strong arms wanted for the tug-of-war! Two teams, ten men aside! Prize to the victors!" The spell cracked. Edgar blinked, the brightness still lingering in his eyes as the noise of the fair rushed back in: music, laughter, the stamp of boots, some enthusiastic shouting from a group of men already gathering near the rope. He looked toward the sound. Then back at Genevieve. A smile began to pull at his mouth, slow and helpless, as if he were trying very hard to be better than his own worst impulses and failing magnificently. "Come," he said, offering his arm again. "Let us see what it is about."
“You do not have to lie about me butchering your language just because you are happy,” she half-teased, her laugh light and airy to keep the tears at from properly spilling. But knowing he felt something meant everything. Did he feel loved by her? It was a constant thought in her mind, even when they were apart. Seeing how moved he was by her gift forced a heavy weight to settle in her heart, though. Genevieve longed for it to be light, but with the looming lie hanging over their heads, the brightness of his joy and vulnerability allowed the guilt to fester into this ugly, unmoving mass. The gift was as much an ‘I love you’ as it was a goodbye. She feared saying goodbye to him, but she knew what would happen when he discovered who she was. He would deem the entire ordeal void, and she would never see him again. Marry a sweet woman as beautiful as him, continue the O’Connor line with children he would adore. For a split second, the thought weighed on her mind until his touch cut through the doubts and insecurities.
Genevieve had taken her time in fastening the cufflinks, simply because it gave her a reason to continue touching him and be impossibly close. It was as close to kissing him as she would get this evening. Especially with William nearby ensuring there would be no impromptu ravishing. His French made her pause and look up at him through her lashes, her smile bashful. Easily, she replied, “Tout le plaisir est pour moi, mon amour.” For that moment, she could have sworn this was heaven and the backdrop acted as his halo. The sounds of the fair bled into nothing but muffled background noise, functioning as the orchestra to whatever this was between them.
The booming voice forced a startled jump out of her, head whipping in that direction before looking back at Edgar. Her expression shifted in silent question before it dawned on her that he might want to participate. “Oh, my,” she sighed with a smile, taking his arm again and sidling up to him as they strode towards the commotion. Now louder, a man in a rather cheap suit called out, “Step right up! Participate in our annual tug-of-war with the strongest arms in Mayfair! Prize given to the victors! But what will that prize *be*? A free morsel? A shiny trinket for a lovely someone? Or—”
The man’s thick, unruly brows lifted when his eyes stopped on Genevieve. And his face brightened, an idea sparking. “Or a chance at courting a very beautiful someone! Someone like this!” He shot out his hand as he gestured to Genevieve and Edgar’s coupling.
Her smile faded and she let out a nervous laugh, fingers gripping at Edgar’s sleeve like they had before. But this time, she wanted to damn near disappear into herself—or him—and pretend they were never here. “I mean, I suppose,” she half-reasoned, looking to Edgar almost helplessly.
But nearby, a group of men spoke quietly between themselves, their eyes fixed on the princess and her fair partner.
|| closed starter || @edgaroconnor || Edgar
|| LOCATION || St. James Park, grassy area
The walk back home was a quiet one. The crickets chirped, people passing in excitable whispers. But she floated the streets of Mayfair like a ghost, lost in time and heartache to someone who saw right through her. The kiss with Kitty hadn’t been a mistake, but it didn’t quell her pain either. In fact, it only made her feel worse. Had she been using her? Had Kitty been using her as well, given her father’s recent death? And what did this mean for her school’s funding? Dominic had rescinded his offer once Mary became involved, and he was of no help now that she’d done what she had.
It was a true shame that they were visible to the eye of Mayfair. Her natural inclination had been to kiss him, or lean back into him as if he were the entire world and she was putting her trust into him. Though, a smidge of regret tangled in those thoughts as she considered whether or not she deserved any of his trust. Not when she managed to fail even telling him who she truly was.
But his voice returned her to the present, its gentleness making her ears perk up. “It would not be a complete birthday without a gift,” she said, trying to tease as well but sounding more helpless than anything. Her concern was that he would not like it, but her and Elliot went through a great deal finding him something worthy to be considered interesting and heartfelt. Genevieve couldn’t tell him she loved him, not outright. But there were more ways to say it than words alone.
Her belly dropped with disappointment, not wanting things to be over yet. She gave little care about the ride, more so concerned with the warmth Edgar radiated from settling behind her. Meeting his eyes, her cheeks warmed. The way he looked at her, as if she hung the sun herself. It was more intimate than any kiss or touch would ever be. The feeling of being undressed without peeling off a physical layer. Her hands met his shoulders as he helped her down, peering up at him until they had to part. “Thank you,” she said, acutely aware of the way his shoulders felt beneath her palms.
Genevieve looked away as they parted and he finally indulged in his morsel. She popped another almond into her mouth, crunching down on the sugary goodness as she took his arm and curled her fingers against the fabric of his sleeve. Always clutching, as if he would disappear out of thin air.
“Mm, I suppose I could offer it to you soon. They will sparkle during the lantern walk,” she said, mouth forming into a sly smile. Her eyes flitted to his caramel apple and without thinking much, she asked, “Could I have a bite?”
In exchange of her request, Genevieve released his arm and used her free hand to pull a velvet pouch from the top of her bosom, holding it out for him. Her smile faded this time, her nerves on display now.
Her hands came to his shoulders as he helped her down. It was meant to be nothing more than balance. A practical touch, brief and proper, her fingers resting against the dark cloth of his coat while he guided her from the painted horse. Yet Edgar felt each finger as if it had pressed through wool, linen, skin, and bone, until it reached the quick, foolish thing beating beneath. His heart struck hard once. Then again. Then faster, as though it had mistaken her touch for a command. For a moment, he held her there between the carousel and the ground, his hands firm at her waist, the fair turning around them in lanternlightt and laughter. She looked up at him, cheeks warmed, eyes bright, and the whole world narrowed to that small distance between their faces.
When she took his arm a moment later, her fingers curled into his sleeve with an instinctive little clutch, and Edgar felt the gesture everywhere. Not merely because she touched him, but because of how she touched him; as if she did not wish to lose him in the crowd. As if, given the choice, she would keep him close. He glanced down at her hand, then back at her face, and smiled because he could not quite trust himself to speak. "Could I have a bite?" Edgar recovered enough to lift it toward her. "Of course." It should have been harmless. A bite of sugar at a fair. Nothing more. But Genevieve leaned in, and the moment slowed with terrible clarity. Her lips parted. The lanterns caught the gloss of the caramel, the shine of it mirrored briefly against the softness of her mouth. Edgar watched the delicate press of her lips around the apple, the faint resistance before the sugared shell cracked beneath her teeth, the way she drew back with sweetness lingering there, bright as temptation. His fingers tightened around the stick. For a second, he forgot the fair. Forgot William. Forgot that he was meant to be a gentleman with a pulse. "Good?" he asked, though the word came out rougher than he intended.
Edgar went still. Utterly still. Genevieve released his arm and reached into the top of her bodice. His eyes did their best to be honourable. But no amount of discipline could spare him from the knowledge of what she was doing. She had kept his gift there. Close to her. Against the private warmth of her own body, beneath silk and lace and all the soft mysteries his imagination had no business approaching in public. Heat climbed his throat and settled high in his cheeks. His palms grew damp. Desire moved through him, swift and ungovernable, but tangled with something far more tender - something that left him more vulnerable than desire ever could. Because she had thought of him. Because she had carried it near her heart.
When she held out the little velvet pouch, her smile had faded, and the nerves in her face undid him more thoroughly than anything else. Edgar took it carefully. Their fingers brushed. The contact lasted less than a second, but he felt it like a vow. "You kept it close," he said softly. He had not meant to say it aloud. The words came from somewhere too honest to be restrained. His thumb passed over the velvet before he loosened the drawstring. The pouch tipped, and a pair of golden cufflinks slipped into his palm. The fair seemed to quiet. They were shaped like suns. Small, finely worked, and warm beneath the lanterns, each golden face caught the glow and gave it back again, as if someone had taken morning, softened it, and made it something a man might fasten at his wrist. They were beautiful, yes, but not merely beautiful. They were chosen with care. Chosen for him. Not for the version of him London laughed over, not for the brother of a marquess, not for the scandal or the charm or the noise. For him.
Edgar stared down at them, and for once no cleverness came to save him. His throat tightened. A faint brightness gathered in his eyes before he could turn it aside. He blinked once, quickly, but the feeling remained, shining there despite him. Small tears, not yet fallen, caught in the lamplight and made him look younger for a breath. More startled than sad. More loved than he knew what to do with. "Genevieve," he said. Only her name. It was all he had. He closed his fingers gently around the cufflinks, then opened them again, as if he needed to see them twice to believe they were real. "They are beautiful," he murmured. His smile trembled faintly, helpless and sincere. He looked at her then, still blinking against the warmth in his eyes, all his usual brightness stripped down into something quieter, as he slipped the velvet pouch into his pocket. "They are... exactly the sort of thing I would never have thought to ask for, and shall now wonder how I ever went without." A soft laugh escaped him, unsteady at the edges. He glanced down at his cuffs, then back to her. "Will you help me put them on?" He held one out to her in his open palm, gold gleaming between them. "I should like to wear them first from your hands."
As thankful as she had been for William's presence, Genevieve forgot about his existence entirely in the moment. There it was again: that impenetrable bubble where the world no longer mattered, and it was only made up of them and their racing hearts. She wanted to love him, and she wanted him all to herself. It was selfish, immature even. But she would rather be those things knowing Edgar was as in love with her as she was with him.
She did not think much of the implications when she bit into the sugary morsel. The crunch, the sour, the gooey sweetness. It was the perfect bite, and she hummed in approval when he asked her opinion on it. Genevieve's realization of his feelings came in measured steps. The heat in his gaze, the shift in tone, the way his fingers clutched the wooden stick keeping his treat upright. Oh. It seemed she struck a nerve. There should have been regret or embarrassment seeping through her bones, followed by bashful apologies. Instead, pride swelled in her chest. "Good," she finally said, licking her lips of the residual caramel. This time, it might have been intentional.
When he took the pouch, Genevieve forced her hand to her side despite the brief touch. It had been becoming increasingly difficult to keep her hands to herself around him. And based on the way his hands clenched and reached into nothingness around her, he must have shared those sentiments. His observation touched a quiet place in her mind, in that terrible thing pounding against her ribs. "I could not risk losing it," she whispered, allowing a gentle smile to break through again. I could not risk losing you, she wanted to say. But she hadn't. Not yet.
As the gift was revealed to him, she kept her gaze directly on his face. And to see the glistening in his eyes, it both broke and mended her heart. It was not the reaction she anticipated, but his appreciation was evident. "You're a bright light in my life, Edgar," she cooed. "And, well, when I think of you, I think of warmth and happiness. Like the sun."
For once, Genevieve was not poignant and elegant. She was a woman in love, and she wanted her feelings for him heard. His admission brought tears to her eyes as well, but she blinked them away as if daring them to break through. She nodded her head with a quickness and stepped a bit closer, plucking a cufflink from his warm palm to secure properly. "I did not intend to bring tears to your eyes, but I am glad to know you feel appreciated," she murmured, flickering between her careful fingers to his face. Then, she twisted her mouth and tried something between nervous, breathy laughs. "Lá...breithe, yes breithe...shona duit."
|| open starter || Riya Das
|| LOCATION || Hyde Park
The world had devolved into white noise. A vibrating buzz that rung in her ears, numbed her fingers. The Das Residence was in shambles. Chaos had reached its depths. Her father shouted, her mother mulled in silence. Their fabric shop did not matter anymore. Not when a soiled reputation was the means between success and failure in Mayfair. And so, Riya sat herself on a bench in Hyde Park, eyes vacant and lips parted as the wind tangled her glossy hair.
Would Charlotte want to see her anymore? Surely an opera singer speaking with the sister of the disgraced Nalan Das would not bode well with the Ton. But it was her sister she was most concerned about. Poor Kavika. Her title, her chances of a suitable marriage. They had all been stripped from her without so much as a shift in the air. She was supposed to attend the fair with Lottie tonight, but what kind of sister would she be? Would it matter? She'd come to Mayfair to find a spouse, and now her own chances had circled the drain.
Footsteps echoed in her ears. Without looking their way, she said, "If you are here to expel your hatred of my family, I suggest looking for my brother. I've nothing to do with his behavior. Unfortunately, we are related, but nothing more than that."
Junho's parents had been very gleeful hearing what happened to the Das. Now Junho is the only American with such a title. He winced when his father had a grin on his face….Junho knew it must have hurt Kavika the most because her own brother did. Nalan really needed to get in check before his family crumbles even more.
He was on one of his few breaks- he had practically been thrown out by his sister, something about getting a break for his eyes... He looked over and noticed Riya... he hesitated before he stepped a little closer. He wasn't even sure what he'd say to her. A sorry from him might be more like an insult than an actaully apology.
"I had a feeling; you are nothing like your brother," He said carefully. "May I sit next to you? I won't be saying anything hateful about your family," he promised. The hate between their families- it wasn't Junho that wanted it. It was fueled by their parents. He only really had issues with Nalan.
Riya finally looked up, wary of Junho Lytton's presence before her. He was not intimidating--quite the opposite, truly--but she was unsure if she wanted to see him. Aera was a dear friend, and her brother should be as well. But the eldest Das girl was not in the mood for friendly affairs. She hadn't even gone to the lengths of speaking to Lottie yet out of sheer embarrassment.
"You may sit," she said, voice percetively softer than before. She subtly wiped a tear, not needing her emotions weaponized by anyone who would pass by. The silence between them wasn't tense, but there was no comfort present either. They were strangers, so what harm would silence offer?
But finally, Riya broke it. "I told him his impulses would land us somewhere here. In this pitch black nothingness of confusion and ruin," she began. "I told him, and just as Nalan does, he did not listen. He only heard his own ruminations, and ruined the family."
"I am sorry for it," she said. "For everything dealing with my brother. Truly."
Such a little brother.
Genevieve decided she properly liked Frederic. Not only was he set on trying to be somewhat kind to her, he also had an unwavering loyalty to Edgar, strode to protect his heart. Even if it meant protecting his heart from her. "Well, most cannot handle the other side of you long enough to experience this side," she reasoned, more genuine than she expected to be.
His wisdom settled in her bones. There was no one else she could listen to who actually had Edgar's best interest in heart from truly knowing him. Not from what others expected of him, not from what they heard. She trusted Frederic's word because he saw every version of Edgar, and loved him hard regardless. She wished for Edgar's happiness and nothing more, so the thought of him not moving on was as painful as him finding another. Her heart had never been in such a conflict. Not truly.
The words that came were definitely not English. But she recognized one word: tráthnóna. Evening. Sighing and allowing her shoulders to slump, Genevieve adjusted Sardine in her arms. "I suppose you are right. I will try to tell him after the fair. I...I do not want to shroud that time in pain. Not yet. Will you be going to the fair?"
Frederic gave her a pleased smile- one only a little brother would give. He tilted his head. "That is true. i don't give many people the chance either." He stepped closer. "You get a chance because my brother likes you so much," He tolds her. He knew that Edgar would like it if they got along. He doesn’t get along with alot of people.
"I don't mean to say it to be mean. He could move on- he could reject you, but it's something you have to be ready for. You wouldn't want to live a lie with Edgar. Wouldn't you like it better if he knew? It'd feel better to spend time with him. if he was with you in truth," He said while he crossed his arms.
"It's not supposed. I am right. I only ever speak the truth when it comes to my brothers." he scoffs a little. " I'll give that to you," He tells her. He can tell how much she loves his brother. He knows it'll work well with just time..."Do not waste time with him," he hums. 'I don't know...I might go to the fair." He shrugs. "Those things aren't really something I enjoy"
"Thankfully, he likes me," she said, trying to be playful, but the concern that Edgar would likely hate her for the rest of his days when he discovered her lie overshadowed any attempts at humor. Genevieve wanted everything with Edgar, but as long as she continued lying and as long as Dominic hated her with every fibre of his being, Edgar would remain out of reach.
She nodded, holding Sardine out to him. She had to depart soon, having recalled the fact that she had others coming to the palace soon for an afternoon in the drawing room. But Frederic was right. She longed to spend time with Edgar truthfully, not under the guise of the fable she told. Even if the fable was simply an omission, it meant more that she hardly spoke of her life when he was willing to lie down everything.
Genevieve did admit, "I tried telling him once. But it appeared everything was going poorly or interrupting me. It was aggravating." But she knew what Frederic would say. That she was obligated to try again until the truth came from her lips, and hers only. "Not even for Edgar's birthday? That is the only reason I plan to attend. You should come with us. I heard there's a jaguar in one of the tents."
Ceara hugged her satchel to herself, giving him a curt nod at his promise. Admittedly, she had forgotten she'd given him a task to begin with. But deep down, where logic and rationale sat dormant, there was a flicker of recognition that she knew he would do well. He would be her aid, and they wouldn't tell Dominic about their newfound professional relationship. But even the thought of Dominic sent her right back to where she was now: careening into the heartache before she had time to land on her feet.
Looking at Frederic gave her pause. His downturned mouth, confused furrow. He wasn't judging, didn't seem inclined to. Instead, he was concerned about her. And suddenly, she understood her mother's embarassment when Ceara caught her crying. Letting one's defenses down in front of someone they want to protect was a sign of failure. She felt she had failed him without so much as a quiver of her breath at the mention of his ridiculously selfish and tradition-bound brother.
"If I am up to it, I will be there. Perhaps I will find you, and we can discuss the animals and how you felt doing the work I gave you. Does...that sound suitable?" The lump in her throat made it nearly impossible to let the words come, but she managed.
Frederic watched her, and he was worried. He had never worried about those outside his family before. But he was right now.
He waited for her to speak because he wasn't sure what to do- what sorta of thing would comfort Ceara? he almost regretted telling her, but...maybe it's better this way. What if she had found out in front of other people? In the middle of a busy street?
He moved closer to her once he had fixed up his bad. he held onto her shirt for a moment to make her look at him. He wasn't planning on going but..." Hopefully I'll see you there," He said, hopeful as he let her go.
~~~~~ Time Skip to the First Day of the Fair ~~~~~
Frederic remembered why he didn't really want to go to the fair. He was standing at the entrance of the fair, unsure because if the few people he did know were here, there was no point in going. A fair with loudness and games wasn't his cup of tea. He wasn't interested much in animals either. He'd rather be at home writing or reading a book.... He only ever went to the fair to spend time with Mary- which makes his chest ache. He remembers all the fun he *did* have because he was with someone he loves. It was always to enjoy things like this with her.
He sighs because he thinks he should just go home instead of moping, but then he turns to leave. He saw Ceara walking towards the fair, so he stopped moving, waiting. "Oh, so you did decide to come," he said when she got close enough. "Are you feeling...well enough?"
Ceara almost second-guessed her decision to attend the fair. Damp grass, smoke, and children screaming with glee by nightfall did not sound as enticing as it had before. But Frederic's voice carried in her thoughts, gentle and hesitant as he had been during their interactions. He wanted her to be there, and she would not keep him waiting.
So upon arriving, her eyes flitted the surging crowds and passing individuals for the youngest O'Connor. Spotting him sulking beside a vendor's stall, she approached. He appeared downcast and that gave her pause. What had happened? It had to have been something with Mary, as her other aide was in disarray herself.
"I did not want to miss the caramel apples," she said. Ceara would not admit that she didn't want to disappoint him. It was as vulnerable as a hug. "I'm as well as I can be. Are you well? You appear sullen. Did...something happen?"