Karina wasn’t an expert at this. In truth, she hardly made an attempt to defend her character with anyone. She’s never had to. Even with her father, she’d dissociate. It was the best way to handle the situation, in her eyes. Derrick often called her out for seemingly coming off as selfish even if that’s never the intent, it’s good that people call her out on it. At least those who matter to her and Lisa had quickly become part of that very small group of people. She wasn’t trying to garner pity but in that moment, she could see why she’d come off that way. She was, as hard it is to admit, trying to flee in that moment. Karina felt like she’s already ruined enough and Lisa of all people didn’t deserve to be wrapped up in that. Allison definitely didn’t. And while Karina didn’t know the full details to what happened and what Lisa had gone through, it was easy to see even as a complete stranger how much that little girl meant to her wife.
Karina kept her silence as she listened and when Allison was brought up, she looked up at Lisa with what she hoped was the most genuine expression she could muster up. “You should expect the same ferocity. I mean, down the line. You should absolutely expect that from someone who has exchanged vows with you and will be living in the space as you and Allison. I promise you that I will protect her like she is my own. Well, she is my own. I won’t hurt her. I’m very sorry that I’ve hurt you.”
Karina listened to the question, her fingers gently turning the ring on he finger. She’ll have to get it resized. Unknowingly, she had lost a couple of pounds stressing over the documentary, getting another in finished in it’s place, explaining to her parents that matched would be a good thing for her, and planning the wedding. It wasn’t something she allowed herself to dwell in. The moment she did that, she’d lose her composure. But when Lisa asked her the question, she raised a brow as she tried to gather her thoughts. It was a lot to reveal but not something she wasn’t willing to especially now after what Lisa had discovered and now that they were married. “I always hoped we’d work out. Even then. I know that a lot of our problems as a couple stemmed from my immaturity. I guess I secretly wished I had that second chance and the stars aligned? I always make that lucky joke, you know? Haha, I’m so lucky because I’m always striking it big or whatever and because things always seem to go my way. And I thought that the moment I met you like wow, this great woman actually likes me. And that luck ran out when things didn’t end up working out. I know we remained friends and all and that was more than I could ask for.” She shrugged and chuckled a bit. “I’m rambling. I guess, if you want a clear response to your question, I didn’t back down because I’ve always felt a certain kind of away about you. It’s no surprise my family adores you and I thought that being matched to you, that luck came back and that I’d have that second chance. So you can see how much I hate that I’ve already started off on the wrong foot with you. I—i know that’s a lot and I’m sorry and I don’t expect reciprocation. I really don’t. But I’m definitely the lucky one here tonight and way back then and when I got notification of who is my match and now and always. I hope I can make you feel a sliver of that someday.”
Lisa was continuing to listen intently and while she wanted to believe Karina right then, her guard was up too high at the moment to take her promise at face value. She would have to see it with time and proof. But hearing Karina explain why she stayed on the Matched app... truthfully, Lisa was a little at a loss for words. She and Karina did have something back then, or else there wouldn’t have been a past relationship and more like a past fling. And she knew that Karina was a good person, even if her upset towards the brunette had spiked and was coming down about as slowly as sap on a tree. Deep breaths helped though.
Drawing in another one and slowly sighing it out, Lisa turned her back to Karina and slowly paced the length of the room a couple of times before returning to the spot she’d been previously standing in. She then moved to take a seat on the bed and looked up at Karina. “Well... I stayed because despite us not working before, there were some good moments, and we aren’t the exact same people that we were back in college. Life’s changed since then. Our responsibilities have changed, and so-on. And I’m hoping that those changes are for the better for whatever future we have together. Obviously the app’s algorithm saw something still between us that we... or I haven’t fully seen yet, but I’m biting into the cliche of trusting the process. More than that, I’d been willing to trust you. That’s what infuriated me so much. And I know you’re sorry, and I know you said that you didn’t mean for things to happen the way that they did, but here we are. So...” Lisa’s eyes bore into the floor as she thought about a way forward, lips pursed as they often were when she was thinking hard. When her light eyes looked back up to Karina’s face, she said, “No more secrets, and for the love of all things, no more involving yourself in that sad excuse of a sorority. Because you and I are married now and if you involve yourself, you’re involving me and I don’t want to be pulled back into their juvenile garbage, nor do I want Allison getting swept up into any potential drama. I need an honest agreement to that, so that we can both put this behind us.”
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