a child weaned on poison

Leah Belfer Nineteen Ingleburn High School "a child weaned on poison considers harm a comfort"

[loserlandon-blog]

Upon the sudden appearance of his newly acquainted cousin, Sam smiled widely and took a sip of the strange alcohol from his solo cup.  He instantly noticed the red, blood shot eyes she had going on, but shrugged it off as her probably smoking too much weed. It probably just ran in the family, right? “Just pour a shot of some shit and light that baby up,” he said loudly, chuckling softly at her obvious disappointment. “I feel like we always run into one another at parties.”

[lbelfer-blog]

Sam was someone the Leah had tried her best to decipher from a distance. When you don’t really know someone as closely as you should, it can feel quite draining at first. The similarities between them had caught her off guard since they’d first started being more than just strangers who shared some percentage of the same DNA. It was getting easier now, she’d even say that she enjoyed his company. Someone in her family that she could relate to. “I don’t want to light shit. I’ll burn my eyebrows off, I will,” she gave his laugh a look of playful annoyance. “We do, now that you mention it. Probably some crazy reason like... free booze. Bonding over a mutual interest in drunkenness,” Leah joked, standing beside him and nudging him softly with her hips. 

[meredithwilsonj]

The room was loud and cold, Mer thought it seemed a little like a prison, but with music and booze, and she could technically leave at any time. Her cup was full of some too fruity juice, and she poured more and more vodka into it every few minutes. “Nah, some asshole decided that was how he was going to open the party.” Meredith shrugged, obviously disappointed to. “We could always just google how to do it, use it to take over the party and everything.”

[lbelfer-blog]

“My late ass is never here for that shit. Disappointment is running through my veins,” she groaned in a pretentious tone, genuinely questioning whether this party was beneath her. The questioning only lasted a moment as she poured herself a cup of someone else's pre-made margarita. “Oh, yeah, we should definitely hit up Pinterest and take over the world,” Leah scoffed, “I don’t even have a lighter. Some kid with a pink stripe in his hair stole it and I haven’t seen him since. Mer, please tell me something exciting before my eyes literally fall out onto the floor.” The overwhelming sour sweetness as she took a sip forced a wrinkle of her nose and a quick sigh. Sure, she could leave, but then her perfect winged eyeliner would just be a waste.

[rialovett-blog]

“i’m about to set that kid’s guitar on fire in a minute,” ria smirked, leaning against the wall. she tried not to get too drunk on nights like these, where she was there more for business than pleasure. it was harder to do good business with blurred vision. still though, she couldn’t sit through this shit without a few in her system, so standing propped up by something had been her way of tricking herself and others that she was more sober than she actually was. whether or not it was working, she didn’t even wonder. “i’ll light your shot with it if you want. pointless, though. it burns all the alcohol off. then you’re taking a weak ass shot.”

[lbelfer-blog]

“When it comes down to the shot or the guitar, I’m putting my vote for Mr. String Fingers over there. He’s making a meme of himself and it needs to end,” she grimaced, really doing the most to seem relaxed and slumping next to the brunette. She didn’t want any messiness tonight for herself, but the lack of excitement had made her tired. “If it’s not my alcohol that’s burning, I’ll gladly take a weak shot. Satisfy my pyro’ urges and a beverage all at once. Yet, here we are and no flames in sight,” Leah’s voice was hoarse, too much time spent with a cigarette between her lips and not enough spent with people she actually liked. It was the very best that the last of her teenage angst could get at a time like this.

[lbelfer-blog]

ria: i fucking wanna kill you

leah: um do it lmao

[lbelfer-blog]

Bloodshot eyes had become the norm’ for the past few weeks, not bothered by the confusion it had caused some of her classmates when they’d seen her. Why? It depended on the day. Lack of sleep was a definite, among other causes. With her mind somewhere else, she’d almost forgotten where she was, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she wandered through the crowded house to the nearest person she could find that wouldn’t bore her to death -- anyone she could blab to. “I was promised one of those flaming shots if I came tonight, but I haven’t seen a firey-anything all night. I feel deceived,” she spoke over the music, though it didn’t seem very loud. Perhaps the only party this year that had obeyed neighbourhood noise laws.

[starkovia]

[callanhall]

Callan sets down his now empty shot glass. “I’m pretty sure that last shot was a bad idea.”

[lbelfer-blog]

Leah cringes at the sound of the glasses connecting with the table, at the point of the night where the sting of the shot disappears a little more each time. “No such thing as bad ideas,” already drunk, her words are lazyily pronunced and not thought through. “Not tonight, anyway. But the next one will be worse,” she laughs to herself. “Maybe your ass needs a chaser, unless you can’t keep up,” she poses her words as a challenge, a quick raise of an eyebrow as she fiddles with the rim of her glass.

[lbelfer-blog]

ria: are you the one playing edm

ria: turn it the fuck off before i end you and your electronic device

leah: do it, i dare you

leah: no one comes between a girl and her funky fresh beats

[dazdandconfused]

[conye-west-blog]

This was happening. He was kissing her and she wasn’t pulling away– quite the opposite, in fact. He wasn’t sure if it was confirmation enough that she reciprocated how he felt, but it was definitely a step forward. If she was going to find out one secret of his from someone else, perhaps he owed her one straight from him. Hand moving to her cheek, he allowed the kiss to deepen, like they were getting used to each other all over again. It was something he was afraid he’d never be able to do, and yet it felt natural in a way, as if it was bound to happen eventually. When she pulled back, he was left breathless; not only because of the kiss, but because her words had him winded.

Maybe it was bad timing. Some part of his brain was silently yelling that he should’ve thought this through a bit better, but that would insinuate that he hadn’t already been thinking about it for months. Moving his hand away, he cleared his throat, a form of wordless apology that he hoped Leah was used to. “Right,” He forced the word out, staring at her for a moment before moving to stand and turning away, taking a couple steps. Fuck. He looked down at the floor and pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. “I, uh… I wouldn’t want you to get in trouble.”

[lbelfer-blog]

Guiltily, she tore her watery green eyes away from him when he left her there on the couch. Leah couldn’t help but assume that she might’ve ruined this with words that distracted from the very real moment that had seemingly passed now. This hadn’t been the intention of coming here, to make the very idea of being without him an even more prominent thought. She’d had to accept that he was something that constantly and effortlessly held a place in the back of her mind-- without him wasn’t something she could be. Whether her pride liked it or not, she couldn’t allow herself to leave it like this. No matter how her reflexes yearned for the door and to avoid any more conflict at home. It dawned on her quite quickly that the trouble didn’t matter if Connor was there like he always had been. Her dad had probably already noticed, leaving now seemed like a waste of the inevitable fighting.

There was a hard swallow from her as she rose and followed Connors steps to him until she could really gauge the agitation. Without a second guess, she took her hands just below his waist and slowly wrapped her arms around there, looking at the closing space she was forcing between them until her head met his shoulder. Even if he wanted her gone, she was holding her wrists behind him like a vice. “Don’t. That doesn’t matter. I don’t know why I--” she trailed off when she did lean back to examine his face again. He’d put himself out there with that kiss. Since she couldn’t muster any words, maybe returning that could help bring some clarity. “Hey,” she didn’t have any intention of going on, pushing up onto her toes just enough so that she could press her lips to his. It felt easier, his kiss breaking that thick ice that had built up and this one assuring her that running from this like she had taught herself to do would be a mistake. 

[forrest-whitaker-blog]

“Apparently, they’re “vegan” whatever the hell that means. I didn’t have to pay for them and they’ve got chocolate in them so I guess it works.”

[lbelfer-blog]

“Vegan’s that one where you don’t eat like anything that casts a shadow,” she joked, straight-faced, before she retracted, “It’s the no animal products thing. So, that chocolate ain’t dairy and stuff.”

[rialovett-blog]

“well, i don’t have a choice, do i?” ria held an arm out in question. “unless denny’s doesn’t mind if i take a bottle of jack with me. or the rest of society.”

[lbelfer-blog]

“Since when are societal norms your concern when doing something?” She gave her brows a wiggle. “Get one of those water bottles you can’t see through, spike your own cola.”

[lbelfer-blog]

@rial: all i do is win win win no matta what

@landonlovell: @rial Dj Khaled - good song!

[lbelfer-blog]

“Shit, Landon. Don’t do that. Don’t drive dumb,” Leah shook her head, a little stunned by the casual manner he’d come at the facts. While she wasn’t ever careful with herself in cars, she had a hard time with the idea of people she liked being in car accidents -- the thought being a very near reality at one point. “I’m glad you found your camera, but damn,” her calm came with a sigh, “I’m alright, thank you, Big L.”

[meredithwilsonj]

“I feel, I’m actually a forty-year-old posing as a twenty-year-old, there’s just more money in it.”

[lbelfer-blog]

“I totally guessed that shit. Someone owes me twenty bucks.”

[rialovett-blog]

“it’s probably, like, a half-step above pbr, but at this point, i’ll take anything,” she smirked, crossing her arms over her. “we really can’t just go get some fuckin’ pizza or something?”

[lbelfer-blog]

“Wow, you’re settling? For cheap-ass beer? I’m shocked. Never thought I’d see the day,” contemplating with pouted lips, she considered Ria’s suggestion. “Nothing’s better than breakfast food.”

[lbelfer-blog]

text - u

dahlia: did i ever show you that sick meteor shower pic??

dahlia: shower.jpeg

dahlia: wait no

dahlia: mshower.jpeg

leah: nice tiles

leah: wait shiiiiit no way thats fuckin rad