let it be okay

i'm lucas and this is where all my sad feelings go!

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maybe i'll just have my best friend eat me when i get home. ask him to help a brother out

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do you think harvey would rip off my other arm if i asked 

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im almost done. tomorrow. we'll go to the cemetary then we go home

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why cant i stop thinking about them

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mikey never smiled. that was the best thing about him

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i could visit moni. she and anthony would be glad i showed up, but i just feel guilty. 

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why did ian always wear tank tops. we were in boston. it is literally 17 degrees right now

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shit. 

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okay brightsides:

i found some old clothes that were mikey and ians

dads clothes

joy division on vinyl

anti anxiety pills

downsides

my mom is literally dead

my dad hates me

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i found a lot of my dad's old harvard sweaters. i probably cant wear them since im not going there but theyre nice to have i guess

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there is so much fucking xanax here i could set ko and i up for life 

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my mom has so many pill bottles still here

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why is everything so hard to deal with? deep questions with luke

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that was rough...