No, she wasn’t thrilled at all. It wasn’t like it had been his fault that he had ended up on the island, but considering all the hell he had gone through, she would have assumed that he’d never want to think about that place, or any island, again.But here he was, saying that he was grateful for it. Penny had spent all those years looking for him, and he had gone through more than enough turmoil.
“Without your help someone else would have pushed that button for you,” she reminded him. “We could have been together.” They were together now, and that was what mattered, but the idea that they could have had even more time together wasn’t lost on her. She was very much under the impression that they could have started their life together much earlier than this, even if he had left her for her father’s stupid race. They were always meant to come back together.
“It may not have been the end, but I couldn’t imagine a single thing you’d be grateful for from there.” She shook her head, not entirely thrilled or wanting to have this conversation, but if Desmond wanted to talk about it, Penny knew he wouldn’t stop.
Desmond had believed, among other things, that Penny would find him. Even while lost at sea, the hope of her recovering him like a beacon to an abandoned ship stayed strong. But in the meantime, he’d had to survive. In that fight for survival, he found a sense of purpose he struggled to achieve on the mainland, with Penny. That he needed to leave her behind to truly know himself had to hurt her.
His eyes fell as she scolded him. “I know that--but in all the times I left Pen, didn’t you wonder? I mean you had to know I’d never become so unmoored from ye without a reason. Didn’t you know that?” He insisted, the question one that still remained unanswered between them after all this time.
He attempted to place an arm around Penny, to pull her in close for a comforting hug. All the time apart left her terrified and confused. He needed to be more sensitive to those feelings. Only the lord knew how much he neglected them in the past. “I’m grateful that time reminded me who I needed to get back to. It reminded me of the love that I had. D’you know I had your picture the entire time and not a day went by that I didn’t hope?” He and hope had a fickle relationship. He lost it after his father died and only recovered it through nearly dying himself.
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