I've been in fandom spaces for quite a while, but I somehow missed the Supernatural hype train when it was on. Then near the end and after it was over, I was completely put off by the fandom, so I didn't want to touch the show with a ten foot pole.
What's funny is that I remember the day when the Castiel confession happened so clearly. I remember every single person on Tumblr losing their mind about it. Then I remember watching the confession and thinking, "Huh, maybe I'm missing something. Out of context, this doesn't feel like a romantic confession at all."
Fast forward a few years, and I bump into Supernatural again in, of all places, an inpatient psychiatric facility. I had a really terrifying episode brought on due to my C-PTSD, and I really didn't think I was going to live through it. I had made it through a lot up to that point, but man, I experienced the worst kind of fight or flight for three months straight, and barely ate or slept or anything.
The facility was in a small but diverse city, so there were people of all ages, races, genders, etc. A few days into my stay there, someone stopped the television in the rec room on an episode of Supernatural. The craziest thing happened. Patients, nurses, doctors, kitchen staff, and custodians all crowded into the rec room to watch the adventures of Sam and Dean. An old black dude who was severely depressed was suddenly laughing and cheering on 'his man, Dean Winchester'. A kid just barely over 18 who hadn't spoken a word since they came in was crying happily over Sammy.
I had never seen something bring so many people together. It was quite a sight. I decided then and there that if I survived the whole ordeal, I'd watch Supernatural. Primarily because it was an episode with Crowley, and I fell in love at first sight.
After finding the right meds and making it through partial hospitalization, I started Supernatural. Watched all 15 seasons while I was still out on FMLA leave.
And, I'll be so honest, guys. I was waiting and waiting for Castiel to show up because of all the talk on Tumblr about 'Destiel'.
Now, a little backstory, I've been a shipper since elementary school. I've been in just about every fandom and I've shipped rare ships, main ships, yada yada. I've written over 2 million words of fanfic across multiple fandoms.
And I just kept waiting for Destiel to happen. I'm honestly confused to this date. For the longest time, looking at it objectively, it honestly felt like Sam and Castiel had more tension than Dean and Castiel.
But, above all that, I really couldn't deny that Sam and Dean had all the chemistry in the world. And I've never even glanced at incest anything before. Hell, I'm a victim of it myself, so it's really not in my wheelhouse.
But, man, wincest hits crazy different. I've actually never seen a more incredible love story in my life. The ups and downs, the self-sacrifice, the outright devotion. And all the bad stuff, too.
It felt, to me, that Supernatural was written as a love story about these two guys and they added in the brother thing after the fact. Like the only way to get a love story this complex on screens was for there to be NO WAY that it could be construed as such, due to their relation on top of their genders.
I know there's plenty of people out there that love what they love and hate what they hate. All in all, it's fiction, and none of this really matters.
Ship and let ship, or whatever.
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