[lemonjuicing]

sad. random thoughts

my life feels unreal. not in a good way. i literally do not feel real.

i recently have came to the conclusion dating isn’t for me. i have no interest in trying. maybe i’m just too used to being alone so i don’t feel like even trying.

today my mom started talking to my grandma about how i said i’m not smart enough to have a different job than what i have now. tears started pouring out of my eyes. my grandma and my mom told me how wrong i am, but why do i still feel like it’s true? as we were about to leave my grandma started crying and told me i’m smart and can do anything i want. i really don’t believe it so i keep crying.

i really don’t see the point of being alive. i don’t necessarily want to be dead, i just don’t have a purpose at all. all i want is a purpose.

[lemonjuicing]

i wish i never let anyone manipulate me. my heart hurts. i’m still sad. i hate thinking back to how i felt during certain situations. i don’t even know why i ever think about it. it’s over now but i can’t get over it.

[lemonjuicing]

i’m starting to miss someone. i thought i was ok and came to terms with everything but i think i was just thinking logically instead of with my emotions. i’m glad i thought logically but now my emotions are catching up with me. everything is so real now

[sharmakeswife-deactivated201809]

do you ever just fucking hate yourself for not working hard enough to reach your full potential?? cuz same.

[lemonjuicing]

I am going to stop inhaling chemicals and eating gross food.

[lemonjuicing]

i’m lonely and nostalgic

[lemonjuicing]

i think being so hard on myself is bad. i am not living life how i should be because i need to be perfect. if i’m not doing something meaningful then why am i living at all??

[lemonjuicing]

dropping dead sounds dope as hell

[quinoaphoenicks]

[lemonjuicing]

why can’t i just be worthless without having anxiety about being worthless. it would make my life a lot easier

[lemonjuicing]

I took a week off of school. I didn’t do assignments for a whole week. I’m trash, but it’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. Breathe bitch

[club7196-deactivated20181024]

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

[lemonjuicing]

my life is so sad.... damn

[lemonjuicing]

i can’t do this anymore. like i don’t know what to do.

[lemonjuicing]

i just can’t do this anymore. repeating isolation and meaningless activities in my life. why was i put on this earth to contribute nothing. i’m wasting space

[lemonjuicing]

i’m not ok and i won’t be ok and ill never be ok