Your name is HARLOW MALWARE.
As your name suggests you earn your keep as a DEVELOPER of VIDEO GAMES; working on your MAGNYAM OPUS as well as various FREELANCE PROJECTS. It's a lot of work but the piper must be paid if you want to continue lavishly ENJOYING COMPUTER. During the scant few hours you're not toiling away in the JUMPMAN MINES you and your GIRLFRIEND make ART related to a little-known webcomic called HOMESTUCK. Despite the fact that geniuses worldwide have discarded it as a boorish catastrophe - some Hindenburg levels of publicly gawked failure - an abnormality in your brain leads you to think IT WAS ACTUALLY PRETTY GOOD. Your Tumblr url is lemonlimeBitcoin and you really can't stress enough that you don't actually like cryptocurrency. It was a fantroll thing! Five years ago!
What will you do?
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