Love is Insane.

Even if I did know what I was doing, I'd be wrong.

[lenaeffinlee]

Tumblrman says everything will be alright.

[dankmemesreasonforliving]

[slcpunkmoved]

"be your best self" and what if my best self is a cunt that can't wake up before noon

[evaughn]

[funnytwittertweets]

[anxietyproblem]

[anxietyproblem]

[sadhoc]

“i’m in kind of a weird mental place right now” i say, as if there are times when i am not in a weird mental place

[positivelypositivethoughts]

[lenaeffinlee]

Idk if you even still follow me. On the off chance you do I have a few things to say. I never did anything wrong and I still don't understand why you did that to me. After 10 yrs of being everything from lover to best friend I just am really lacking closure.

If you were going through something, why didn't you tell me? If you were having money issues, we paid for all tux rentals. All I needed was your time. I didn't invite anyone who would would've dead named you or even know you. I would've worked around any issue you were having just to have one of my soul mates be a part of the biggest event of my life.

We're trying to have a baby now. I wish you could've been their uncle Rob.

I miss you.

[lenaeffinlee]

[cvntycannabis]

a blunt never made me feel worthless tho

[ilikeyoshi]

me: hey how long is this thing going to last

someone: haha you just want to know when you’re off the hook

me: hah

me: (actually i just need to allocate the right expectations and backlog of energy and make sure the rest of my day falls in good accordance with it so that i don’t feel time-crunched and propel myself into a hysteria because if i don’t know how long this thing lasts or when it ends i can’t possibly know when literally anything else starts and my entire life becomes an unraveled realm of anarchy with no rhyme or reason and how is that not terrifying to you)

[ilikeyoshi]

me: hey how long will this take

someone: oh like twenty minutes

me: ok

*an hour later*

me: *clinging to every learned social skill i can think of with the desperate hope my distress and exhaustion doesn’t show*

someone: hey we’re almost done don’t be so crabby

me: *smiling* *internally screaming at this SENSELESS CHAOS*

[ilikeyoshi]

someone: hey do you want to do [involving time-consuming thing]

me: hey that sounds fun! when were you thinking?

someone: oh we’re doing it right now

me: oh. like. now-now? like right now. like you want me to stop what i’m doing and get up and do this thing with you, suddenly, with thirty seconds of warning. now. like this second. immediately. now?

[fckin-deactivated20171107]

I’m thinking about her

[eclipsebykimlipmp3-deactivated2]

forbidden fruit

[isaacmemes]

Why do grown ass adults want to eat Tide pods so much?

[kitswulf]

Because a ton of the visual/olfactory/textural sensory information these pods give me the match nutritionally-dense fruit. It’s got the oleic gleam of something high-fat like an avocado, but bright carotenoid-rich coloration like a berry that wants to be eaten by red-seeing primates and birds. It tends to smell sweet and slightly floral, enhancing that effect. Similarly, when you hold it, it is quite dense (denser than water), but very soft and liquid, once again reaffirming that this “fruit” has either high sugar or high fat content and almost no cellulose to it.

As a result, within me is a less-clever monkey just screaming to eat this delicious fruit in my hand about to go into the laundry, and it does in fact take willpower to tell him he’s a stupid monkey and this is a bubble of foul-tasting poison. But every time I do laundry, this fucking limbic monstrosity rises again and assures me it’s basically like a cherry but Even Better. I have legitimately debated just biting down on one in the hopes of inducing a deterrent memory to forestall this urge in the future, but that’s what my goddamn mammal-brain wants me to fucking do and I refuse to let it win.

[lenaeffinlee]

This makes me think of that eos lip balm post that says "because egg"

[lenaeffinlee]

Same.

[lenaeffinlee]

Having a lot of trouble today. It's the day before my 26th birthday. My brother passed away two years ago four days after his 28th birthday on November 28th. I'm going to be another year closer to being his age and then eventually I'll be older than my older brother. And that breaks my heart in so many ways.

[stevebuscemisnipples-deactivate]