Who needs romantic emotions anyways…?
CW: Internalized Arophobia, General Venti/Mondstadt storyline spoilers (?), Feeling hopeless/useless/unwanted, low self-worth, LMAO PROBABLY SPELLING MISTAKES IM TIRED
Reader extras: Aromantic! Reader (Romance neutral/repulsed I think???)
Gender neutral- pronouns used (You, They, Them)
You were completely fine being by yourself!
You constantly reminded yourself that your platonic bonds were just as important as romantic ones, and that your current platonic bonds were stable.
It’s not like they would just up and leave you for a romantic relationship.
You were completely fine with your platonic relationships because you trusted your friends because they trusted you!
Your platonic relationships were completely, and utterly stable!
So why were you upset right now?
Upset might be too harsh of a word. You just… Realized something you didn’t before.
You don’t want to have people ask you out- because it would be awkward to explain your lack of romantic emotions in general.
It would be such an odd experience for them if they didn’t even know that existed. It’s one thing to get rejected, but another to get rejected because they don’t feel romantic emotions.
You wouldn’t be stuck in a weird position if nobody ever confessed to you!
Did that also mean you were unwanted…?
Thinking about it logically- maybe people just knew you were aromantic and decided not to confess. It would save you both some time anyways.
However… Does that mean that nobody sees you as a romantic candidate? What’s wrong with you…? Surely someone might want to pursue a romantic relationship with you, right??
Walking along the path to the Windrise tree, you were hoping to just get some fresh air. Hoping that a certain bard might’ve clocked in early.
But as you neared, the soft strum of a lyre informed you that your thoughts were completely irrational- considering it seems like this menace never sleeps.
Softly groaning, you didn’t want to back down. It would be quite embarrassing to have him watch you approach the tree and then immediately leave after senseing his presence.
“Seems like someone’s out late.” He giggled, his eyes fluttering open, half lidded.
“Hello, Venti.” You wave, trying to put on a less distressed attitude.
“What’s brought you out here so late?” He welcomed you, patting the place next to him and looking toward you expectantly.
Waltzing over to side beside him, you plopped down next to him.
“Thinking about some things.” You say, ominously yet honestly.
“Well, care to share?“ He says cheekily, his eyes closing once more.
“It’s sort of a rant if you’re willing to listen.” You sigh.
“The winds always listen.” He chuckled, strumming his lyre haphazardly.
“Well… I just noticed that… I probably won’t be asked out, romantically that is.” You side eye him, watching his reaction carefully.
His eyes remained closed, yet he hummed for you to continue.
“Which is great for me! That’s a whole lot less explaining to do, considering yknow… Aromantic.” You giggle dully.
“But you’re upset about that.” He finished, already semi-senseing the problem here.
“Yes” You groan out angrily.
It was silent for a moment as you regained your thoughts.
“I’ve been told from such a young age that having someone love you romantically means that you’re wanted in someone’s life. That they care so intensely about you that they want to marry you, or… Something, I don’t know…” You mumbled, getting embarrassed.
Saying this out-loud made you feel stupid. This was such an idiotic thing that made you upset.
“I just want to… know what it’s like.” You whisper out pitifully. You hadn’t even realized you whispered that out at first.
“I know I wouldn’t reciprocate those feelings, but the thought of someone seeing me in that type of pure, romantic light makes me feel like the world hasn’t abandoned me.”
“That maybe I wasn’t as broken as I thought, that someone saw me as a regular person, with regular emotions… Regular, romantic emotions…” You sigh out.
“And it hurts, just a tad bit. Because I don’t want people seeing me in a romantic light because I know it would only hurt them in the long run- but feeling wanted? Wanted in the way that people have said is so fulfilling and amazing and… and…” You try to explain once more.
You suddenly plop your head down on Venti’s shoulder, bringing your knees to your chest as you stare up toward the starry sky.
“I want to feel wanted, romantically because that’s what the world told me. That being a good romantic partner means someone cares for you. But… I don’t want that. I don’t want to be a romantic partner.”
“It’s like… I want random people to think that I’m super attractive and would be a great romantic partner and then forget about me in like 2 days…” You mumble out in distress.
“But I don’t want to lose platonic relationships because of romantic emotions, I just want people to view me as someone who they would want to date, but never actually… Date me.” You say, a dull hum of emotions residing in your chest.
“Isn’t that selfish? That I want to be perceived as attractive, and wanted but I don’t want anyone to actually do anything with their emotions? That’s such a selfish thought.” You had already came to the conclusion.
You just needed Venti to agree.
It was selfish of you to want such a thing, honestly shows how unstable you feel about yourself and your platonic bonds.
“…You’re emotions are so valid.” He says after a moment.
You turn your head slightly to see his eyes open, looking toward the grass down below.
You weren’t expecting that answer.
You were expecting him to ridicule you for those idiotic thoughts. That you technically were unwanted.
“You have grown up knowing that being wanted means that someone seeks you out as a romantic partner. So having to rewire that from your mind is going to take a long time. A long time of you trusting your platonic relationships and yourself.” He said quietly.
“You want to feel like someone finds you suitable so that you know you’re fitting in, but also you realize that you don’t want that. You just want to know that you’re fitting in, without anyone actually making a move.” He had slight realization in his voice.
“I have to unlearn everything to accept myself. People will look at me like I won’t ever find fulfillment because I don’t have a romantic partner and I just… Hate it.”
“…Well. If it makes you feel any better, you’re wanted in my life.” He whispered.
“And it might not feel like much, considering I’m just one person in your life, but you matter so much to me.“
And while you understood the emotion you felt, you couldn’t form it into coherent words.
The feeling of overwhelming sadness mixing in with an overarching happiness swarmed in your chest as you tried to thank him.
You were so sad that you wouldn’t feel what everyone else felt, so upset about it, actually.
Upset that you probably would be deemed unwanted and not useful.
But you were happy that someone wanted you.
Someone, in this seemingly Archon-less world, wanted you.
And not romantically- thank the Archons. They wanted you platonically.
Venti is your best friend.
More than a best friend, your soulmate you thought.
You couldn’t find the words, felt like whatever you said wouldn’t equate to how much calmness Venti just gave your heart and mind. So you decided to just sit in silence.
You were going to be alright.
Because now you are looking forward to the time ahead for when your mind has accepted that you don’t actually need romantic attraction.
You had came to terms with the fact that you don’t have it, but you haven’t let go of the thought of needing romantic attraction to be happy.
But right now you’re with your best friend.
Who wants you in his life.
So for the time being, you’re just hanging out with your best friend, under the Windrise tree, counting stars.
hello readers!! i have returned!! i’m not going to be posting as much as i was before because school teehee 💔 but yknow, i’m back!
nd why not bring myself back with some aromantic content, hmm?? i love writing about aromantic content because i can either show the absolute trust and fulfillment from platonic bonds or talk about how isolating of an experience it is!
many people focus on romantic content because people feel like they have to get a partner, but i’m here to feed all the aromantic people who read fics for the comfort and vulnerability that romantic relationships bring, and show people that hey! platonic relationships can do this too,,,!!
and yknow i’ve got a soft spot for a certain bard ^^
WHICH I GOT RECENTLT AND MAXED HIM OUT WOOOO
but yeah i’m back and doing better ❤️
