| ᵗʳᵃᵘᵐᵃ ʳᵒᵒᵐ ᵇᵃʳᵇᶤᵉ

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

here she was, not even able to walk, not knowing if her legs were going to be OKAY, and here she was, asking about him. as if he had to be asked; she was the one that needed the attention. he was lacking sleep, from the ungodly amount of uncomfortable in the level of comfort in these beds. and with  the machines, the beeping had made him question his sanity. but being here with lexie was his priority. work could wait; the two were given time to recover, by hospital policy.

‘ i’m fine. a little sleepy, but fine. ‘

immediately, he wondered if she was hungry or such. the hospital food wasn’t great either; the cafeteria was better, but the hospital kitchen wasn’t that great, after eating most of their choices through the weeks they’d been at the hospital. 

‘ are you hungry? thirsty? i can get you something to eat or some water if you want. ‘

the father in him came out; he was so used to caring for sofia, and especially after callie and arizona had left her with him for half a week, while they went to a conference. mark happily agreed to take care of her, and he thought he was doing terrible until karev told him  otherwise. so mark figured he was doing something right. 

     She knew setting up camp in a hospital bed had to be rather awful for him. He was used to being the one on the opposite side of things, giving the orders, not receiving them. But he wasn’t well enough yet to go home. He would be soon though – he was getting there, Lexie could tell. He was almost back to his full efficiency, and it was a sight for sore eyes. Seeing him laid up like that was... awful –– but now at least ONE of them was out of bed, walking around, getting back to normal. Of course she wished she could be doing that too... but she wouldn’t be. Not for a long while. If ever.

     “You really should get more sleep, have you even rested at all today?” she asked with the raise of an eyebrow. He almost surely hadn’t, but he’d probably tell her yes anyways. That was just Mark. “I’m... not hungry, but I could use some water,” she said, her hand moving to her throat which was rather dry. 

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

hearing her chuckle made him instantly smile; she was lacking the humorous part of herself the recent days, it had seemed, and seeing her smile like that had sent a shock-wave of happiness throughout his whole body. the past couple of weeks had been  somewhat dismal; arizona was getting her prosthetic and learning to use it. and after a walk around the hospital wing with callie, he learned that arizona wasn’t taking the adjustment too well. 

‘ she might as well have been speaking spanish, but i think i got most of it. you’re doing good, lex.’

the others were fine; and a lawsuit was being set up against the airplane manufacturer, as meredith and derek drove the operation. cristina was mute, from  what hunt had told him. mark always thought cristina was a robot; it was like she had no feelings. and he resisted the urge to tell lexie all these things; the  terrible gossiper he was.

‘ i love you. ‘

    She shrugged her shoulders. She wouldn’t say she was doing good. She had her moments. Moments where she’d snap, or cry, or curse everything and everyone. It’s been part of her treatment to talk to a therapist. She wasn’t the biggest fan of it. In fact she didn’t like talking about it at all, or thinking about it, let alone to a therapist. Lexie wasn’t too sure how everyone was doing, besides Meredith and Derek. Cristina wasn’t doing too well and neither was Arizona. But at least everyone else was doing okay, she knew they’d get through it.

     She chuckled lightly at his comment, nodding her head, “Well I’m gonna have to learn it myself if that’s the case,” she told him, smiling softly. She decided to ignore his comment about her doing good. Being as though she wasn’t quite sure she believed it herself. If anyone was doing good, it was him. Walking around, barely in any pain anymore, he was on the verge of being back to normal. And she was happy for him. He had Sofia, he didn’t need to be bed-ridden. “I love you too,” she said softly, squeezing his hand. The two were back together, for the most part, even though Lexie had some doubts ––– mostly revolving around her legs. She tried to push those thoughts aside –– for Mark’s sake.

     “How are you feeling?”

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

seeing her slowly open her eyes, he sat up a little more,  giving her a smile. she looked like she had just survived a 50 hour shift, and had to be sent home because she was falling asleep on the job. he let out a small, soft  laughter as he slowly got up, walking to her side and  pulling up the chair so he could sit down. he took her hand, gazing into her eyes.

‘ she said it went well. they’re starting with your lower ankle and moving their way up. that’s what she told me, anyways. ‘

he said as he held her hand in his, wanting her to know that she wasn’t alone. he’d felt awful; she couldn’t even get up out of bed because of her legs, while mark was making such a faster recovery. 

‘ sofia told me to say hi. she misses you. ‘

mark had a small smile as he spoke about sofia; she was his pride and joy. next to lexie. he’d loved sofia with every bit of his heart, and loved being a father to her. and even though she couldn’t quite talk, mark knew that she missed lexie. 

      She was relieved that it went well. Or at least it seemed to have gone well. She was relieved she still had her legs. And she was relieved that she was ALIVE. Things could have gone very wrong in surgery, and clearly they worked out in her favor... this time. She’d been working on trying not to be SO negative about everything, but it was hard not to be. At least she had Mark ––– keeping her sane, keeping her on the right track. In fact he was the ONLY thing keeping her sane right now.

      She watched as he walked over, taking her hand and sitting down next to her. Smiling at the contact. They didn’t have much of it these days. Lexie couldn’t get out of bed, Mark was better but not 100% himself. She smiled at the mention of Sofia. She loved that little girl, even though she hadn’t really gotten the chance to get to know her too well. She was Mark’s, and Mark was her’s and so she felt an odd sense of emotion towards the girl. She wasn’t her own child, but she knew she could care for her as if she was.

      “Oh did she tell you that? Or are you just interpreting her gibberish?” Lexie asked with a small chuckle, which rarely happened these days.

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

weeks had passed, and the couple had felt the time tick slowly. after a few days in idaho; they had found out they were sent to boise after the crash. and after those few days, the doctors notified the two that the crash victims were being transported back to seattle for treatment. mark was relieved, however, they had to ride in the helicopter due to the fact that neither could stay off the medications or even move.

but soon enough, mark had began to feel better, after one last surgery and a heap of medications. so with feeling better, he finally could stand out of bed, and  walk to the bathroom and around the wing. he even began to take sofia for an hour or two, and he loved it. but he  had made sure never to leave lexie; and soon enough, she was starting her treatments as well. torres was doing all that she could to save her.

after her first treatment, mark had been staying awake, as callie said that she would wake up in a certain time frame, recovering from the anesthesia. and mark wanted to be there for her waking up, to hold her hand. he still wasn’t able to hold her, except for when he’d hugged her, due to the strict policy of no sleeping together, nor  disrupting the patient’s bed-space. so he waited, in his bed, for her to wake up. 

    Even though Callie told her she would try to save her legs, she knew the chances of that actually happening were slim to none. So she didn’t bother getting her hopes up. She’d save face while people were around her, talking to her, asking her questions, visiting her. But when she was alone, the sadness became almost overwhelming. She didn’t want to lose her legs, she didn’t want to be wheelchair bound. She wanted things to go back to the way they WERE. She wanted to be normal. Due to their request, they’d kept Mark and Lexie in the same room for the most part. She liked being around him, he kept her sane.

     Her eyes fluttered open slowly, she was groggy, tired, and coming out from being under anesthesia. She groaned slightly, glancing briefly around the blurry room. Her eyes moved to the foot of the bed. Seeing the tips of her toes she let out a sigh of relief. She still had her legs. They weren’t gone. ( Yet. ) She turned her head to the side slightly and could see Mark sitting up in his bed. “I’m guessing it went okay –––– since they haven’t chopped ‘em off yet.”

[lexipcdia-blog]

i actually have somewhat of a busy day today so replies will be done when i get home and settled in a few hours :) x

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

‘ pick out a movie and we can RELAX.  i think today’s been a pretty big day. ‘

he grinned, before lifting off his shirt, showing a simper smile  as he  pulled  it off, tossing  it to  the dirty laundry hamper before climbing onto the bed with her. he looked over to the alarm clock to see the time nearing 1 AM,  and he had to be up first thing in the morning. but he’d choose this, over sleep any day.

‘ and it’s a big day tomorrow, too. i’ve got a woman coming in for just about  everything on the menu. face, lips, nose, ass; you name it and she wants it. ‘

    “We don’t have to watch a movie,” she said, crawling over to her side of the bed and slipping under the covers. It was late, and if he had surgery she didn’t want to keep him up. Chances were she wasn’t going to get cleared any time soon, but he still had a job to do. “We can just go to sleep,” she said, laying her head down on the pillow and scooting herself over so that they were touching slightly. She had a hard time falling asleep if she wasn’t touching him in some way. It had just become a habit.

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

hearing her complain about being in her own bed, and not his, made him want her in his even more than before. though, he could remember how many times he’d heard the request before, at seattle. it was ALWAYS denied; strict hospital policy. but mark wanted nothing more than to hold her; or just to touch her. then shortly after, he heard the replay of how did this happen?

he knew that he’d be calling his lawyer as soon as he could; he wasn’t going to let the airline company get away with it. he was sure that everyone else would be too, and if they won a lawsuit, it’d help pay for medical bills. not that money was the real issue, regardless. 

‘ the engine must have failed; it was  something. i’m… pissed. ‘

he said in a groan, looking out into the hallway. the nurses and surgeons rushed by, and patients, and families; they were all in  the hallway. it was like any other hospital. rushed, crowded, and busy. he figured that it must have been the afternoon; it was too dark to be morning, but too light to be evening. the morning sun always stood out to him, and it wasn’t familiar in the room.

‘ meredith was saying the same thing. ‘

    Lexie briefly flashed back to the last thing she remembered. Sitting in the back of the plane. Everyone was quiet, and then all of the sudden there was sky, a loud noise, and everything went dark from there. Until of course she woke up under a large hunk of metal. She shuddered thinking about it. She hoped the memories of falling out of the sky stayed submerged, that was something she never wanted to picture. It was a miracle they were all still alive. An act of god that Lexie wasn’t even sure she believed in.

    Lexie was starting to get tired -–– it was probably the meds. She could feel her body getting weaker and sleep sounded very appealing. But where had Torres gone? Were they going home? When was SOMEONE going to do SOMETHING about her legs? She wanted to speak these questions out loud but she was just too tired to –– too tired to even open her mouth. And it wasn’t but a few second after Mark stopped speaking that she felt herself drift off.

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

predictable? he grinned at her comment, before kissing her lips one last time before tightening his grip on her hips, slipping a better grip, and picking her up. she was light; she was tiny, in his eyes, and easy to pick up. carrying her to the bedroom, he laid her down onto the bed, before smirking  and lifting her shirt to expose her stomach, which he leaned down and began to kiss. 

‘ did you expect that? ‘

he asked between the kisses, looking up occasionally to gaze into her eyes as he made the few kisses on her stomach. he knew she loved it; if she didn’t, she would tell him to stop. and if she had, he’d know that something was wrong, or that her day wasn’t going as planned.

    A laugh escaped her mouth as he picked her up, her legs finding their way around his waist as he carried her back towards the bedroom. A few moments later and she was laying down, her legs unwrapping and her eyes watching him. She would never get enough of him –– she’d never get tired of him. That was just pure fact. As predictable as he was, he was always surprising her. And that was just another one of the million things she loved about him. He lifted her shirt slightly, lips trailing her stomach. Sighing she closed her eyes briefly, she loved the feeling of his lips on her skin. “No ––– but  I like it.”

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

     “At least we’re in agreement on that front,“ he chuckled. “Oh, don’t apologize to me,” he muttered with a shake of his head. “You should apologize to the bus crash victims that are probably being admitted into the hospital right now,” he teased. He met her eyes and he couldn’t help the smile that formed on his lips. “Hmm, me either,” he muttered. He raised a brow at her. “We could fix that, you know,” he suggested.  

    “Okay when we get back, I’ll head straight to the ER and apologize to anyone and everyone, and hopefully I’ve learned my lesson,” she said with the swift nod of her head. Smiling softly as her eyes scanned over the menu in front of her– she suddenly realized just how starving she was. The food from the vending machine just wasn’t cutting it right now. She glanced up at his suggestion, eyebrow raised slightly. “And what do you propose we do about that?”

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

he had pleaded for the nurse to help her calm down, and she was determined to give medication; obviously she knew that the medication would help, because she made no hesitation to inject the medication. mark watched as she calmed down, which had calmed him down just as much, if not more. knowing that she was safe, made him feel better alone.

the nurse made her way to his bed, before doing the same to his fluids. it must have been some time since the two had  gotten their medication, because the two had gotten more and more painful and tired from the pain, it seemed. slowly, mark lowered himself back onto his pillow, letting a huff of breath out. she was one to talk, he thought. 

he laid quiet for a while, listening to his and her breathing. it was almost soothing, he thought. it reminded him of the times at night, where he’d wake up, and hear her sleeping. it was always just enough to get him to doze back off, fast asleep, arm usually wrapped around her. especially on the damp early mornings where it’d just drizzle all morning. 

‘ i hate being in these beds. ‘

he admitted, as he wanted to check on everyone; check on her, check on sofia, check on meredith and derek, on arizona; and  make sure they were all OK.  but here he was, not even able to sit up in his own bed without breathing complications. 

    Her eyes followed the nurse as she left Lexie’s bedside and made her way to Mark’s. Giving both of them just what they needed to relax -––– even though Lexie was the one in all out panic. Her thoughts faded, whatever fears she’d had before were still there but minimized, for the time being. Funny how drugs worked like that. No wonder people got addicted. They were numbing, making an unbearable situation bearable. Lexie was having a NUMBER of epiphany's.

   She wished they weren’t so far apart. She wished she could hold his hand, lie next to him. She’d give anything to be able to walk over and slip herself into his bed next to him. “I hate not being in your bed,” she said softly. Whether that was this bed here, an on call room bed in Seattle or the bed in his apartment. She just wanted to be next to him. “Why did this happen... I don’t understand.” How did this happen? Clearly something went wrong with the plane, but what? What did any of them do to DESERVE this?

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

‘ well then correct me if i’m WRONG, but i think we need to get in bed. we’ve got a long day ahead of us, and i’m already having second thoughts about the romantic movie thing. so; i’ll do the dishes tomorrow morning, and we can get into bed now. ‘

he smirked, hands gripped at her hips as he spoke to her in a planned voice; who knew what the next day held for them; it seemed like every day in that hospital brought out a different outcome of SOME sort. not that it was anything bad, but their lives were a teeter totter. 

‘ time for dessert. ‘

    “Of course you are,” she said with the slight playful roll of her eyes. His hands were on her hips, she liked the feeling of his hands on her, anywhere… her hair, her shoulders, her hand, it was just overall comforting. She shook her head at his last comment, letting out a small chuckle. TYPICAL. Nice to know things hadn’t changed. Nice to know he hadn’t changed. “Mark Sloan –––,” she said with a slight smirk, “You are just too predictable.”

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

Mark was already breathing heavy almost hard and fast. He rolled up on top of her again after they had discarded her panties. “I like this kind of break activity, little Grey.” He said with a small smirk before he trailed kisses around on her jaw and pecked her lips. His own hand slipped down between them and he pulled down his boxers aswell, kicking them off his legs. Only Lexie could really make him feel this aroused so fast. Make him feel this special and good.

    The girl grinned slightly at his comment. Truth be told, this was currently the only break activity she liked. Little Grey. She had come to terms with the fact she’d be dealing with that nickname for the rest of her life ––– courtesy of Mark Sloan. “Me too,” she said, nipping at his lips slightly as he removed the only remaining piece of clothing between them.

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

he had wanted to just be next to her; hold her hand; comfort her. she’d been crushed by a plane, and now she was sitting alone in a hospital bed, and he couldn’t even hold her. he immediately sat up a little more in his bed, feeling his chest hurt, but he didn’t care; he needed to HELP her. 

‘ we’re going home soon, lex. i PROMISE we are! ‘

he said, voice rising to cover hers as she seemed to be having a breakdown of some sort; and he couldn’t even HOLD her, just like before. and it made him feel awful.

‘ lex, just BREATHE. ‘

he said in a somewhat soothing voice, as he tried to just get her to level out her breathing, and mellow her out. all of this wasn’t going to be easy; and not just this part, but every other part. if they were going to  save her legs; it would take the hardest work. and if they did make it, then she’d be a miracle case and a  medical INSPIRATION. 

      Her skin was crawling. She didn’t want to be here, she didn’t want to be in this bed. She wanted to LEAVE. Go home. Get out of this bed. Anything. She could hear Mark talking, but she couldn’t hear what he was saying. Not over the sound of her panicking. She used to KNOW what her life would look like, and it was a pretty picture. Husband, kids, a career. But now all she saw was pain and uncertainty. She didn’t like it. She didn’t WANT it. No promises could be made. Mark could try to make her promises, but she wouldn’t hold him to them. She knew at this rate she wouldn’t be SLEEPING IN HER OWN BED or Mark’s bed for a good long while. Home was going to become the HOSPITAL. Normally, she’d be okay with it ––– as a surgeon, not as a patient.

     At that moment, a nurse walked through the door, pain meds in hand. Lexie IGNORED her as she let her know what she was doing. Lexie’s eyes continued to wander around the room as she felt the medicine entering her system. It was soothing, it calmed her. Her heart rate slowed –– almost instantly, and her head fell back against the pillow, to heavy to support. Lexie moved her head towards Mark, closing her eyes briefly. “Lay down, you’re going to hurt yourself.”

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

Mark wiggled out of his scrub pants. What they had together was passion, heat and fun. And he loved that. She was so mature for her age to be. Just the right woman for him. His large hand roamed down her side before he grabbed her hip, pushing it lightly ip towards his. He claimed her lips once again, fingers tugged down in to her panties almost teasingly, dragged them off her long and slender legs. Mark adored her body, the way it curved beneath his touch. She was truly one of the best he had ever been with. She always made him long for more.

     Lexie groaned softly as he brought her hip up to meet his. Being with Mark was different than being with anybody else. The way her body reacted to him was mind boggling, something she’d never experienced until being with him. Sighing quietly against his lips she felt him begin to peel her panties from her legs, wanting to get rid of the wretched clothing between them. Once they were low enough, Lexie kicked them the rest of the way off, joining the rest of their clothes on the floor.

[thundergrace]

[lexipcdia-blog]

hmp. that last reply got to me a lil bit.

[lexipcdia-blog]

MARK.

looking over, he saw her begin to panic. he heard her begin to mumble sentences about her legs; and he knew that she was realizing the circumstances. her monitor began picking up speed, which was definitely not helping their situation. mark then knew that she was now coming back to her real self. not a bitter, angered and cold lexie.

‘ lexie        LEXIE. you’re gonna be fine. ‘

he said, trying to get her heart rate to drop. he knew that she was just talking and rambling because she was realizing a life without legs. the full realization.  torres was a professional; words like TRY were much different out of her mouth, than his, the plastic surgeon.

‘ torres is gonna do everything she can; you know she will. and you’re gonna be fine. you’re gonna walk, okay? i know you will, lex. ‘

ANYTHING to calm her down.

      It didn’t matter. It didn’t matter what Mark said. It didn’t matter what Torres said. Nothing mattered. When it came down to it ––– the chances of her keeping her legs were small, microscopic even. How does one COPE with that? How does one HANDLE it? As doctors you’re taught how to help patients adjust, how to help them see what can be done and how they get there. But the only thing Lexie could SEE... the only thing she could see clearly, was a life of wheelchairs, doctor visits, and Mark: giving up part of his life to take care of her. No. That was NOT okay. None of this was ‘okay’. She shook her head at his words, they weren’t true. Even if Torres could save her legs, what are the chances she’d ever WALK again? Shallow, shaky breaths left her lips as her skin boiled. It didn’t feel right, this didn’t feel like her body, she didn’t want it to be her body. At this moment, her body was not her own. “You don’t know... you DON’T know,” she repeated, “I don’t want to be here ––– I want to go HOME.”