🌻ymmd.

[lgcjaemin]

lgcparkdohyun​:

Bros being Bros

The holiday this year left….a very bittersweet feeling in Dohyun’s mouth. His confidence with his singing and dancing has increased drastically over the past year–the tour solidifying his belief in his abilities and talents and cemented his desire to stay on the Idol career path. At one point, he could even say that he was starting to become confident in his sexuality, but well–that didn’t last long. 

He gained confidence in his chosen career path—but he also lost his parents support and love, which has broken him in many ways, and his self hatred was at an all time high. Dohyun had only told one person about what had happened, and his Hyung Yonghwa had tried his best to be there for Dohyun throughout the tour, but Dohyun still found himself bottling up a lot of those emotions, not wanting to burden his Hyung. 

All these thoughts swirled through his head as they touched down in Paris–and stayed with him for the next few days as he forced himself out his hotel room and into the city, taking pictures, eating food, and trying to enjoy himself as much as he could. 

Though, today he found himself staying in his hotel room, eating a sad packet of ramen and watching shitty subbed dramas on the hotel TV room when he heard a knock, Ah yes…he had forgotten that his friend would be stopping by to celebrate, “Come in!!” he called out as he finished his ramen and set aside the empty bowl, “You better have brought alcohol!”

@lgcjaemin

considering the fact that jaemin had never left korea for any reason whatsoever, he was more than ecstatic to head to paris. especially following chuseok. it was just a weird holiday for him. everyone returned home to their parents and spent time with uncles and cousins and everyone in between but... he really only had his grandparents. that wasn’t to say that he wasn’t grateful for them and didn’t have a good time but holidays where family was prioritized always made him realize just that he really didn’t have a family like everyone else. he always knew this but it was sometimes easier to repress it by any means necessary. 

with chuseok still fresh on his mind on the plane ride over, now was certainly one of those times.

he texted dohyun as soon as their flight landed and they were loaded into the cars to be transported to the hotel. it had taken him a while to settle in but with nothing on the schedule for the day of their arrival, he opted to meet up with his friend who he knew would understand his situation better than anyone else. a short trip to grab a few things he had forgotten and a small bottle of wine later, jaemin was at his hotel room door knocking to announce his arrival.

the others voice carried and he opened the door, holding the small bag out first in a greeting as his smile beamed across his features. “hey!” he wasn’t totally sure if they were allowed a drink or not but he didn’t bring enough for anyone to get completely trashed. just a nice calming drink. “ssh!” he hushed him, peering back into the hallway before quickly closing the door and coming inside. “i don’t know if we can have it,” he started, reaching in the bag to produce the bottle of wine along with rice cakes he had brought from korea. rice cake was a must for chuseok after all. “but i managed to get a bottle.” he announced, setting the bottle down. “this should be enough, right?”

[lgcjaemin]

new trimester plotting.

and with the start of a new trimester just like geonwoo, jaemin is on the lookout for new plots! listed below are the events he will need threads for so please just give this a like and i will come your way!

ACTING MISSION

jaemin is fortunate to be a part of the lead cast of the kim family drama that is going to be filmed this trimester and so he will be a bit restricted during this mission this time around! he will need threads for the acting workshop primarily as he will not take part in the interrogation but he will sympathize with those who have to face the detective bc whoo boy that’s scary to him!! i will be willing to take on up to four threads surrounding this since he will only be there two times a week but i also want to help others that may need points!

open

open

open

open

ENTERTAINER INTERVIEW

VARIETY SHOWS

i also intend to sign him up for the BABYSITTING show! so any others who will be participating, i will be more than glad to take on threads for that when requirements come out.

KIM FAMILY DRAMA

what i said above also applies to this! when requirements come out, jaemin is all yours!

GENERAL PLOTTING

jaemin is just also available for general plotting overall! he’s gotta get a little out of his bubble because he’s got a lot of dev i want to get the ball rolling on!

[lgcjaemin]

new trimester plotting.

and with the start of a new trimester just like geonwoo, jaemin is on the lookout for new plots! listed below are the events he will need threads for so please just give this a like and i will come your way!

ACTING MISSION

jaemin is fortunate to be a part of the lead cast of the kim family drama that is going to be filmed this trimester and so he will be a bit restricted during this mission this time around! he will need threads for the acting workshop primarily as he will not take part in the interrogation but he will sympathize with those who have to face the detective bc whoo boy that’s scary to him!! i will be willing to take on up to four threads surrounding this since he will only be there two times a week but i also want to help others that may need points!

open

open

open

open

ENTERTAINER INTERVIEW

VARIETY SHOWS

i also intend to sign him up for the BABYSITTING show! so any others who will be participating, i will be more than glad to take on threads for that when requirements come out.

KIM FAMILY DRAMA

what i said above also applies to this! when requirements come out, jaemin is all yours!

GENERAL PLOTTING

jaemin is just also available for general plotting overall! he’s gotta get a little out of his bubble because he’s got a lot of dev i want to get the ball rolling on!

[jaemtens]

😳😳

[lgcjaemin]

                                                   🌻  ━ ACTINGMISSION STUNT 101                                                                   BASS KICK SWINGING LIKE BRUCE LEE

acting like this was sure to become a part of his future and jaemin had to ready himself for it. he didn’t have a violent bone in his body and he avoided confrontation at all costs but there was something about action roles that drew him in. something that showed a raw human emotion but radiated strength instead of weakness. he wanted to be like that. to have that kind of fearlessness that took each challenge head-on and did not shy away from any semblance of consequences. there was a lot of power that those who played dramatic action roles held that kept their viewers on the edge of their seats and kept their fans wanting more. he wanted to be that kind of actor. the kind people anticipated.

he was limber from years of dance but one thing he learned during the stunt workshop was that he needed to also look the part. it was one thing to get comfortable going through the motions but another to make them look natural. to let the choreographed fights look realistic and show impact where it mattered most while also keeping in character. it took acting to a different level than he was used to and even after having worked with such a lovely partner, he continued to strive on his own with a dummy.

extend his arm, turn his body, envision the point of impact to let his body react accordingly...

he strived to be taken seriously. maybe it wasn’t best to let the words of someone like taesung roam around in his mind but they did. why was he so scared? why had he hesitated? why did he hesitate so much? jaemin knew well enough he was his own worst critic and he often held himself back because of it even when he strived to do so much more and it hurt no one but himself. it was a self-fulfilling prophecy where he continued to validate the lowest aspects of his self-esteem.

each hit on the dummy grew harder, more fervent, frustrated...

there was no point in strenuous practice if he did not fight to prove himself. he wanted to establish himself and it felt like a constant battle against his own mentality but even with all that weight lingering on his conscience, he still had drive and determination. he just had to make that paramount. he had to push that through and show himself more than anyone else that he was capable of being the great actor he’d always envisioned himself to be.

maybe it was the adrenaline still from the workshop. maybe it was built up testosterone and the suppressed emotions bursting through but he felt a bout of determination with each strike against the dummy.

he wanted to do better.

                                                    he was going to do better.

                                                                                                       he deserved to be better.

[lgcjaemin]

                                                    🌻  ━ ACTINGMISSION HISTORICAL DRAMA                                                                               LIGHTS, CAMERA, ACTION!

it might have been something unexpected for jaemin and those who knew him but he shied away and avoided romantic roles if he had any true say in it whatsoever. there was a lot that came with immersing himself in his feelings -- feelings he usually kept well at bay and tucked away -- to acknowledge emotion on camera instead of faking it as actors usually could. it touched on unhealed wounds and scars he’d bandaged over to forget their pain until another day or until it became too much. only then could he express himself fully. feel what he really felt. hurt and angry. it was why he liked action roles and melodramas so much more. he could let himself free while he acted. it was healing for him.

the role was hardly a role. he was an extra on set just like everyone else and while his hanbok wasn’t extravagant like the nobles who had gone through extensive hair and makeup, he found comfort in the spun silks of deep greens and whites. the gathering area in the traditional village was filled with other bodies of extras, some from legacy, some casted by other means he supposed, and though there were large cameras and dollies blocked out to catch the perfect shots of the actors faces, jaemin could feel the immersive air that they all stood in. he was usually a laughing, generally clumsy bright presence who oftentimes gave off the appearance of a lost puppy but none of that was anywhere to be found once he was able to be on set.

he wasn’t a lead actor this time around but he was still just as focused.

it was the atmosphere they would create in ambient shots that would empower the lead actors performance and each role that was caught on camera was an opportunity. extras became memorable because of their emotion and the power they could hold and jaemin intended to do just that. anything to get himself recognized and his skill acknowledged. he wasn’t overflowing and oozing confidence like some of the other actors in the company but he knew he was good at what he did and he held that determination within him to commit. he made his way to the front of the crowd of extras and he kept the camera in his sights so that it saw his face.

even from the background, he was still going to make the spotlight his.

[dokyom-archive]

joshua - the music day 200912

[lgcjaemin]

lgcjinseo​:

{ 🌻 } + 진서 : français or nay?

Jinseo suddenly regrets not knowing how to speak French. He knew he should have taken that over Spanish back in high school and university. At least he can speak English, so there’s that. He already has an idea of how he’ll be filming his video. He supposes that maybe he can go with a mix of usual toursity stuff to do, as well as a few hole-in-the-wall spots. Jinseo starts by writing all his preferred locations on a notebook and eliminates options from there. His angle is something like “Seoul is a place to have fun…” 

As he’s working on his script, he hears a familiar voice call out to him. Jinseo looks up to see Jaemin enter his room. 

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that Jaemin is about to ask for help. True enough, he does. Jinseo then gestures for Jaemin to sit on his bed and make himself comfortable. “Ugh. I feel you right there. I’m actually working on my script now. I’m obviously doing it in English, since I can’t speak French,” Jinseo says with a groan. “At least I already have a theme. I just don’t know how to get it all in words. How about you, Jaemin?” 

jinseo seemed to be so used to his antics at this point that jaemin couldn’t be anything but grateful. the easy wave over to join him is met with a smile and a bright ‘thank you!’ because he already knew that he was in need of dire assistance. he moved to sit beside the older male on the bed, curling his leg beneath him as he leaned over to look at the script jinseo had been working at. english.... was not his forte. he was decent at it. he could read and understand the basic words but his pronunciation was still very much that of someone who was born and raised in korea their entire life. being from busan, he still had to work and make sure his seoul accent stayed in tact let alone english.

his head tilted a bit before he shook it in slight awe. “wow. you’re really good at english.” he said with a poke of his lips out before he held up his small notebook. “i thought about doing some of the landmarks seoul has to offer like historical sites and things like that.” he offered up, running his hand through his hair. “but i thought it’d look best if i wore a hanbok or something like that and i’m not sure it’s possible to find here in france. so maybe some modern landmarks? like lotte world, everland, national parks, markets....” his voice trailed as his eyes trailed to the other to see his reaction to check if what he was saying seemed like a good idea or not.

[lgcjaemin]

lgcjinseo​: { 🌻 } + 진서 : butterfinger.

Jinseo can only shake his head. “If you insist. But if you feel anything, just let me know.” He moves to set the first-aid kit aside. He takes in the damage for what it is, and he has to figure out how to fix what he can before the other guys get back. 

“I guess I’m glad I left all my school awards and other breakables at home,” he says, in an attempt to lighten the mood. “If you’re not hurt, we better clean this up before the others get back.” He walks back in to get the broom and dustpan from his bedroom. “Before we figure out a plan, let’s make sure no one else has to step on glass. Come on, Jaemin.” 

While they clean up, Jinseo then decides to break the silence, again. “Why did you think of cleaning today, Jaemin?” He’s not mad, if he’ll be honest. He’s more concerned for the motivations behind Jaemin’s actions. Besides, it was also better to let Jaemin know that he was willing to listen to him rather than scold. He doubts that Jaemin meant to destroy things, unfortunately, it is what happened. “You know you could have called me, right?” 

“As for the others? It depends on how valuable the stuff you broke is,” Jinseo admits with a sigh. “Do you remember what was on that shelf before it came tumbling down? Let’s go from there and figure out which stuff can be fixed, what you’ll need to pay for, and whether you’ll have to grovel at the other guys’ feet in apology.” Jinseo allows himself to snort at that one. “I hope you don’t have to grovel, but I’ll be here to fix whatever we can fix. I can also help you cook a nice apology dinner if we have to.” 

he’d already caused a mess so in his eyes having to be the one taken care of didn’t seem fit when there were others who were going to potentially be upset by his mistake. he’d take care of his arm a bit later but for now he’d rather focus on the situation at hand. he laughed a bit at jinseo’s comments and rubbed at the back of his neck, moving to rise from his seat as well. “yeah, i know right? keep them safe and sound where they belong.” 

as jinseo goes to retrieve his broom from his room, jaemin does the same with a hand broom and dustpan to start on the shelves in case any glass had gotten there as well. his mind was running a mile a minute, trying to think of how he could make up for this situation before jinseo’s voice fortunately gave him reprieve. “hm? oh. just.. because. everyone is usually so tired because they have more physically strenuous training schedules than me and i noticed the dorm could’ve used a bit of work so...” he gave a gentle shrug of his shoulder as he swept some glass onto the dustpan. “i thought it’d be nice for them to come back to a clean house and something to eat.” cooking had been a part of his plan too or at least a nice dessert.... “i definitely have to make sure it tastes good now.”

he flashed the other a grateful smile and gave a gentle shake of his head, bringing the thick plastic bag he’d carried for disposal of the glass around so that he could begin emptying the shards carefully into it. “you’re one of the ones who are the most tired usually, hyung, no offense. you usually stay in your room and i didn’t want to ask you to do even more work.” he lifted the bag carefully and rolled back the edges, shifting to place it nearby jinseo before starting to pick up the items that had broken to take inventory. “it’s kind of exhausting being at the company all day so sometimes you just really want to relax, you know? i didn’t want to disturb that.”

a few picture frames and a ceramic mug that looked like it might’ve been a gift. the picture frames could be replaced no problem but it was the gift mug that had him chewing at his lip. “what to do about this one?” he exhaled, lightly trying to see if he could place the bigger broken pieces back together. “i could try to seal it back together... but then the cracks...” his hands ran through his hair and he pressed at his cheeks as he groaned. “should i just make a new one? there are those... ceramic experiences. you know the ones where you go in and take a class and make your own ceramics? maybe i could do something like that since i doubt i’d be able to find the same mug.” he suggested before jinseo’s words made him smile. “you don’t have to do all of that, hyung, really. you’re already being so helpful and i’m the one that messed up.”

[lgcjaemin]

{ 🌻 } + 소연 : whose line?

@lgcsoyoun

“he was unconscious when i found him.”

acting lessons could get a little wild especially when improv was involved. having to think on your feet to create a cohesive scenario that would continue into a storyline while also remaining entertaining, it really put all of their acting skills to work. to fully immerse and convince your audience, have them follow along with you while keeping them strung along. improv really boiled down to just how great of a liar you could be and how convincing you could be while you did it. jaemin was pretty good at it. he had the tears ready and everything.

down on his knees, he lamented with his head in his hands, tears streaming between his fingers as he rose his gaze to look up at soyoun in despair. the pained ache in his eyes and the vulnerability written in his slumped shoulders, his hands slightly trembled as his head gave way to a gentle, hopeless shake. “is there nothing you can do?” a tremor in his words on the verge of tears again as he began to rub his palms together, a desperate beg as his head continued to shake and fresh tears streaked down blotchy red cheeks. “please tell me he’ll wake up, doctor, please. tell me that you can save him.”

[lgcjaemin]

{ 🌻 } + 진서 : français or nay?

@lgcjinseo

japanese and very little english. that was the extent of jaemin’s exposure to languages that were not korean and honestly those were all he thought he’d need for the extent of his career. nothing more, nothing less. but now he was in france where none of those languages applied and he had to prepare a video that would introduce seoul. him. a non-seoul native. maybe if they’d asked him about busan he could’ve flexed his accent but seoul was just so standard that he was introducing a city that was not his hometown while also wanting to use a language that was not his own. talk about a cultural clusterfuck. so who was best to call upon in this situation?

“jinseo-hyung...”

a familiar cry not rarely heard in their dorms as he approached the older male in that way that indicated he was going to ask a favor, the telling curl of his lips of his smile an obvious giveaway. he slid to sit at the table the other had been resting at, holding the script with him, and he brought his elbows up onto the table to cup his own jaw and cheeks. he smiled, bright and warm like sunshine. “have you started on your video script yet?” a hand ran through his hair, softly ruffling the medium-length dark tresses back a bit. “i’m kind of struggling a bit so i was trying to get a bit of inspiration.”

[lgcjaemin]

lgcxjongsuk​:

[ 🌹 ] giving into capitalism.

jaemin’s comment makes him chuckle as he zips his bag up and tosses it over his shoulder. leave it to his soaring ego to subtly make sure he solely used one arm to be able to flex on the younger male just a little bit. oversized shirt or not, his biceps still was no joke. “sometimes two or three times, depending how much free time I have,” jongsuk tags on, a grin on his lips. he stops there however, not wanting to discourage the younger from potentially buffing up himself.

some of his statements though leave jongsuk a little thoughtful. ‘nice to touch’? could little jaemin potentially be not so straight? not that jongsuk minds as a bisexual himself but it was always nice to find more folks who thought like him. “if you want we can go to the gym together,” he offers instead as he heads out of the room, holding the door open for jaemin as the younger shows him the place he picked out.

“yep, that one looks great! when we get to the car just give me the address so I can put the navi on.” ruffling the younger’s hair he ushers him along towards the garage. with his car keys out he presses the unlock button, the lights on his audi flaring up to give away its location.

there seemed to be a lot of people who went to the gym in the company but jaemin only just began to realize the importance of buffing up to obtain certain roles just recently and even more so now looking at jongsuk. he had very handsome face and a charming smile and when it was coupled with his physique, jaemin really could see him in a romantic comedy no questions asked. he wasn’t sure that he gave off those vibes himself just yet... but that was definitely a new goal to work towards. it always felt like he had so much to improve on... but he’d do whatever it took.

he always lost his head a bit in situations like these. always the type to be swayed easily, get distracted and get flustered when in situations with those he found attractive led jaemin to ramble a bit and speak carelessly while fighting against his own thoughts. to put it shortly, he simply had no game. he was far from straight but he treaded cautiously about it especially within company walls... minus the few kisses he’d had here and there in the past. trying to keep his head under wraps and a cover up sometimes meant a crack in that defense and sometimes he wasn’t always aware it’d happened otherwise he certainly would not have let those words slip. it was one thing to think it but to imply that his abs seemed nice to touch... well that was a red flag if he’d ever let one slip. “yeah, for sure! i feel like there’s a lot i could learn from you. i’ll try my best not to be that student that slacks off so go easy on me at first.” he requested, dipping his head into a playful bow as though asking for a favor. “i can barely keep up dancing with you.”

he let jongsuk lead the way, fully prepared to head to the curb for a cab but judging based off of his words and the directions they took, clearly they were not going to take a cab. as his hair was ruffled, the feeling endearing, he looked towards the older male. “i didn’t know you drove.” but it’d make sense. jongsuk was older and he did seem pretty self-capable. of course he’d know how to drive. “i’ve always been so scared to.” he admit, his eyes searching for the summoned car before he saw the lights. his eyes widened a bit softly. not only to drive but to drive such a nice car on top of that... he controlled his expression but he couldn’t hide that he was impressed. self-capable indeed. his bag was carefully stored away and he settled down in the passenger seat, tugging at his seatbelt as his head swiveled a bit to look around curiously, stilling only when jongsuk entered the car before passively commenting, “your car is really nice. i don’t think i’ve really ever seen an audi let alone be in one and you drive one everyday.”

[lgcjaemin]

lgcyushin​:

lukewarm

❀ DRESSING ROOMS w/ JAEMIN ❀

there’s always a strange rhythm in the air before a concert, be it backstage or in the change rooms. yushin’s excited, and nervous, irrefutable considering they went from closed door bootcamp and performances straight to this - maybe it was good prep. it is nice that everyone joins together for this concert too because the distance between the trainees who have left to their own dorms, and on separate subsidiaries makes this feel even more real - that this is work, and this isn’t some fun vacation where they all chill. 

but it’s nice to see familiar faces, such as this one that he hasn’t seen in awhile due to conflicting schedules and the like. yushin pops up behind jaemin who is sitting in a chair right now, and it’s not as if he can startle him - there’s a mirror right there, but he says it anyway. “boo!” as he clasps his hands on jaemin’s shoulders. “hey, it’s been awhile. it’s nice to see you again.” he moves to sit beside him, nudging his friend lightly. “it’s nice that we get opportunities to perform together again. miss having you in our training groups, and the dorms. do you miss this whole..performing bit at all?”

@lgcjaemin

it’d been a while since he’d gotten his hair and makeup done to go on stage. his time at legacy was pretty uneventful almost like his time in high school while working towards his acting career. sure, he was still young and actors usually hit their stride later than idols but he wanted to feel just as important as the other actors at the company and he mainly felt that way when he was able to be tended to like an artist in this way. so naturally that meant he’d have to take a lot of commemorative shots to remember the day by. he still sat in the makeup chair even though the stylist had already left and he held his phone up, focusing on the screen to make sure he had the best angle for a premier mirror selfie.

he switched to a video as yushin made his way up, a smile spreading across his features, waving into the mirror as the other approached before he let his phone rest in his lap altogether. “yushin-hyung!” a bright greeting as he dropped his head back to smile up at him before turning to face him properly, both arms brought onto the armrest of the chair he sat in. “i know right? it has been a while. it’s probably so boring there without me now.” a joke obviously as he beamed, the warmth in his smile like sunshine at seeing an old friend. “hm... i mean the dancing part is fun.” he mused, giving his head a gentle shake. “but i think it’s best i stay off the microphone.” an easy laugh he could have at himself. he was never good at any of that performance aspect. “i’m just happy to be able to see a ton of fans. maybe someone might even start a fanclub for me because of today. what about you? aren’t you pumped or have nerves kind of started to settle in?”

[jaemtens]

shua @ mmtg

[lgcjaemin]

jaemin had heard talks of what the final interview would entail after his audition. the feelings were still heavy on his heart as the words from the script continued to play round in his head. the emotional scripts were where he excelled and he would fit handpicked into a melodrama were he called upon and the romantic ones he let his charms come to the forefront as he basked in and gave into adoration. it was the comedy script he'd had to practice the most and he'd opted for performing that one first. he'd wanted his forte to be his lasting impression even if he was not prepared to perform on gag concert anytime soon.

family. friendship. love.

they were recurring themes that appeared frequently in dramas and there wasn't much that could be done to avoid them. even if his own memories were filled with hurt surrounding them, he also was aware just how beautiful each one could be.

what is the meaning of love to you?

a question that shouldn't be too hard to answer. he mulled over his words as he stood before the panel of casting directors, a low hum sounding gently in his throat. "for me... love is untamable. no matter how much you may want to reel yourself in and remain rational when it comes to who you may have fallen for, you are always deep within the grasps of something that is so above you that you can't help but succumb to its every whim and desire. love is powerful and truly can transcend all adverse outcomes as long as it is true but that's where love becomes tricky because love is rare. to find actual love would be equivalent to finding a needle in a haystack in my opinion. i think love comes in many forms beyond just romantic and it is something that is inescapable but it also varies in degrees. you may have love for someone but you may not be in love with them and it is that difference that will determine the strength of someone's relationship because, as nice a thought as it may be, i don't believe love to be unconditional."

have you ever been hurt in love?

the question genuinely almost made jaemin laugh but he reeled himself in for fear of sounding bitter. it was a very light smile he wore as he gave his head a deceivingly easy nod. "yes, many times. not just romantically but also the kind of love that draws you in with family and friends as well. it's excruciatingly painful and scary to open yourself up like that again after feeling what it's like to be hurt that deeply but it is a part of the process of learning to love and live with yourself as well that strengthens you. even though my heart hurts often because of it when i think on the experiences, i'm not sure i'd change a thing. so much was learned from my experiences that i think any that i'd have going forward would be all the richer for it."

have you ever hurt in love?

"i honestly can't say." he spoke a bit candidly as his head tilted a touch, head shaking gently. "i tend to be on the more naive side when it comes to love and so i was often told i missed cues or signs from others." he gave a soft laugh, his ears touching just a bit red. "i can be kind of clueless in that regard. if i had hurt someone because of it... it's likely that i very well might have but i can say that it was never my intention to do so. i was never really one that was the bad boy type but sometimes you unintentionally end up being the bad boy. i hope that hasn't been me..."

what is the ideal relationship to you?

he began to smile softly just thinking about it. he was never good at romance or being romantic with someone but there were more than enough times he'd thought it over and fantasized about how perfect it could be if he was. "like i said, i don't believe love is unconditional. it is hard to overcome and while things may drive you absolutely insane, there's always going to be a grasp over you that that person holds. i would like for that grasp... those parts about me that drive them insane.. i would like for them to not become a burden on them and change their perception of me. a relationship where communication is key and where walls that are worn in public are nonexistent so that honest conversations can be had even if the words are tough to hear. someone that is like a partner to me who will help me the way that i can help them and our journey together is one of growth and admiration for one another. someone who like a constant best friend that knows when to challenge me but also when to let me be. i wouldn't want them to derail their entire life to be with me because that would fill me with guilt and burden my heart but i would want them to passionately pursue their dreams no matter the cost because seeing them happy and ambitious would make me happy too. i'd want someone who was a best friend, a lover and a caregiver all in one that always keeps me in their heart even when it gets tough so that we can continue to grow together."

if you love somebody, would you hold it in or tell them?

"i...." he started before he paused a moment, his teeth biting at his lower lip as he gave a gentle shake of his head. "i would love to be the type that would speak up but i'm not. i hold it in because it's scary to think about losing them more than it is to be rejected. love is a tight grasp that is a hard one to escape and when people hear that word, they begin to think of all kinds of things and sometimes that makes them run. i would rather keep that within myself unless i knew there was the chance they might feel the same just so that i could keep them by my side. i'd hurt in silence on my own before i'd face the possibility of a severed tie with someone i care about so deeply. my own wounds would heal but not all burned bridges can be repaired."

[lgcjaemin]

gonna try this!

its ugly because i'm posting from mobile right now but any threads for jaemin. i had to do a thread drop for him because a lot of them were old / outdated / not replied to and i wrote up a ton of other starters for lovely people who volunteered their muses but overall he really only has a few threads left. if i can come to you for quick plotting or even a starter with something pre-established, please go ahead and like this post. i'd really appreciate it. i really don't want to have to solo stuff for the family concert and just his development in general but i feel like he's getting really stagnant and it's kind of bumming me out because i love him as a muse and haven't really been able to do much with him so i really want to give it a fighting effort.

[leechani]

trying on accessories and looking good 🤥