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$LAYYYTER
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@librarylantern
2025.05.12.
This semester has arrived and passed within the blink of an eye. In the past few months I have lived more than in the past 25 years of my life: made new friends, deepened relationships with both others and myself. I don't exactly know just yet how to feel about it all ending within just a couple weeks.
Chapters ending always stir up things deep within.
(The photograph was taken the day after I drowned. I am in the lake, in the center of the picture, just under the surface. It is difficult to say where precisely, or to say how large or small I am: the effect of water on light is a distortion but if you look long enough, eventually you will be able to see me.) -Margaret Atwood
2025.03.11.
The older I get the less I can handle movies like this, so I will definitely have to watch this in two parts. While it obviously is important to face the misdeeds of prior generations it fills me with an indescribable anxiety to live in a world so turbulent and delve so deep into a movie, enough to analyse it during class. Sometimes I really wish we could engage with things that are less depressing.
2025.02.06.
Feeling very green lately, spring is coming, hormones are through the roof (embarrasingly so).
Screenshots from: Clifford Geertz "The Impact of the Concept of Culture on the Concept of Man"
2025.02.24
Successfully survived the first week of university. Got to see some friends, which was pleasant of course. So I'll soon get back to posting regularly. Until then, have my Notion setup for the semester.
2025.02.12.
Sometimes self care is putting on a sheet mask and proof reading your brother's script for his presentation and making fun of his nonexistent spelling skills. (And this is not at all me trying to procrastinate doing the homework my therapist gave me.)
2025.02.11.
Uni is to start in a week's time and for the first time in my life, instead of dreading it, I am looking forward to it as my last semester. Things have been rather turbulent lately, but definitely in a good way. I've been travelling a lot, accidentally took the metro in the wrong direction, got slightly lost multiple times, and had a lot of good coffee in all sorts of beautiful places. (And saw a lot of adorable kittens of all shapes and sizes)
And most importantly, I finally got over my fear of writing. It's been too long since I have lost this part of myself. It's nice we found each other again.
2025.02.07.
Fun times, fun times. I just wish it wasn't this cold. Also finally got a fountain pen, now I just have to learn to use it properly.
2025.02.03.
Packing light.
2025.02.02.
Finished setting up my reading corner in terms of the painting off the wall and actually getting the armchair in. And I could not be happier, so now some well deserved reading time.
PS: the paint was just super pretty as I was mixing it.
2025.01.30.
Taking some time to think.
It's been exactly 4 months since I began therapy and taking medication to manage the symptoms of my mental health issues. During my last session I had the bombshell dropped on me, that I have been either misdiagnosed or have a comorbid condition. And that really upset the identity that I have managed to come to terms to.
Am I really just a sum of the tasks I carry out? And then what's next?
2025.01.24.
Last exam of this semester, hurray hurray! I have no idea how I thought signing up for 8 exams and taking up 44 credits worth of classes would be a great idea, but oh well. I survived it.
Daily plans:
•Revise all communication theory exam topics
•Go and have a celebratory brunch by myself
•Actually take the exam
•Go to work
•Get a good night's sleep for once!
2025.01.23
Had a horrible/awesome experience during my exam. Drew a topic that I didn't even know was a topic. But I was allowed to draw a different one, and because I felt so bad I essentially elaborated on the whole semester's worth of things and I got an A in the end.
Other than that I have literally not done anything. I am absolutely exhausted and drained. Tomorrow is my last exam of the semester.
2025.01.22.
Last hurrah before my final two exams of this semester and then I can enjoy a little bit of freedom.
Daily goals:
•Final revision of Rhetoric and Stylistic exam topics
•Notes on Communication Theory topics 3-6
•Read over notes on Communication Theory 1-6
•Finish chapters 6-8 of Jane Eyre
PS: still completely under the influence of having seen Atonement. And it wasn't even the first time.
2025.01.21
Woke up at 5:30 today, and as I was upset I immediately started studying to get my mind off of things.
°Revise all topics for Rhetorics and Stylistics exam
°Finish first 3 topics of Communication Theory exam topics
°Make an actual lunch that is not only caffeine and nicotine
And as a reward I decided that I must absolutely decorate my card slip for work haha.
2025.01.20
Finally finished all the Rhetoric and Stylistics topics, even if a day later than I anticipated. I still have time after all.
Thought someone might find the summary of some of the tools useful.
https://www.scribd.com/document/818211725/Figures-of-Repetition-Quick-Notes-The-Library-Lantern
You can access the PDF at the link above:)