life's grand parade

Baltimore's Only Psychedelic Cowboy Blog 

[lifesgrandparade]

It's a gas

[lifesgrandparade]

This performance is like when all the mutual are online at once

[lifesgrandparade]

What the fuck is this paragraph

[lifesgrandparade]

I think the easy thing to say would be "This was written by AI" but friends, I imagine I've read more execrable sports journalism than... 99.9999% of this goddamn pencil necked geek website, more execrable online sports journalism too, and let me tell ya it is EXTREMELY HARD to tell the difference. Especially since the model is training their shit off of things like Vichy Deadspin. There is an author tied to this fucking disaster paragraph but I gotta imagine he wasn't trained under the personal tutelage of Grantland Rice. All they've required in the past 25 years is a pulse and a sincere desire to make under 30,000 dollars a year.

This might be the most passive paragraph I've ever seen. It's like Ralph is the new king after the royal family was killed in a horrifying photography accident. That's a King Ralph reference for the 18 people who saw that in theaters. Rest of the article is doo doo as well. I'd hope someone gets fired over this but I'm pretty sure that's MLB network standard at this point.

[lifesgrandparade]

What the fuck is this paragraph

[tedchaough]

The Wire

Season 1 Episode 5 “The Pager”

[inlandwest]

Durango, Colorado

[deadmotelsusa]

Opened as a Holiday Inn, closed as the Mountain View Lodge. Sitting abandoned since 2015. Located in Corbin, Kentucky. Sources 1 + 2

[tatangadragon]

water sports should be for adults too.me and the blokes at university should be allowed to shoot eachother with water guns

[tatangadragon]

post cancelled I've been told the term i used already exists in english and that it means something Very Much Different. english is a wicked language that i regret learning

edit:i did not expect this post to break containment so I should note the image here is from this user .specific version here might be an edit? either way i wanted to credit the artist

[kvetchlandia]

Man Ray Self-portrait, Paris 1924

“To make a picture you need a camera, a photographer and above all a subject. It is the subject that determines the interest of the photograph.” Man Ray

[kvetchlandia]

Uncredited Photographer The Who, THE Mod Band, at Their Fist Gig After Changing Their Name from the High Numbers, the Marquee Club, London Nov, 1964

“Rock ‘n’ Roll might not solve your problems, but it does let you dance all over them.” Pete Townshend

[argylegiant-deactivated20200112]

[lifesgrandparade]

@bbcwhereareyou That's such a wonderful little factoid that I almost feel ashamed that I'm going to say that I think THe Natural is one of the worst american sports movies ever made. In a genre that is packed to the brim with terrible films. Unlike most,The Natural tries, which makes it even worse. Everybody's good in it, the setpieces are amazing, the movie is dogshit boring for fifty fucking hours.

What I always ask, when someone says "The Natural" in response to favorite movies of all time (Something you hear less of nowadays. It's almost like I"m grateful nobody has an attention span anymore!) is... Do you like the movie The Natural, or do you like it when Robert Redford hits a home run into the goddamn lights while American Icon Randy Newman explores the studio space with the score? I love LA!

The movie is soooooooo fucking serious. It is glum, it is dour. I need to emphasize to anyone tht hasn't seen the Natural, this is a movie about a man with a magic baseball bat. It is Germany: Year Zero except there's a magic baseball bat. I get it. I do. But you could add a couple more jokes in is all I'm saying. But it's 2 hours of depression, and one minute where the guy gets off the magic bat narcotic and hits an American home run with a regular ol louisville slugger.

When I was in 4th grade, on the last day of the year, we had a choice of two movies that the teacher probably rented out her own damn self. One was The Natural, and the other was the Rocketeer. And goddamn, i used whatever political clout I had to tip the vote over to the Rocketeer. Andy Mikulski was pissed! Hey Andy, maybe if your great aunt was here you would've won the vote. But like... The Rocketeer is fun, action packed adventure where a guy with a rocket pack helps defeat Nazis with the help of the American Mob. "Go Get em Kid." The Natural would be no different from Social Studies. The older I get, the more I stand by it. Can you imagine 4th graders sitting and watching The Natural? There would've been a riot!

[yeahiwasintheshit]

Never saw the natural only vaguely remember the bumpers that played on hbo and the baseball-into-the-lights scene. Didn’t even realize that the baseball bat was magical?!?! Feel like I also vaguely remember Redford cut down a tree to make the bat??? for some reason… did i see this movie???? lol I don’t think I did. Anyway, Was there really bad music? Cause thats always been a pretty big deterrent for me to watch something. Most notably taxi the tv show. Hatttttttttttttttttte the theme song and so never watched the show. Anyway I’m tryin to think why I never watched the natural since that mid-late 80s time period was when I was collecting baseball cards so not sure why I would have skipped watching it… but if the music they played in the bumper annoyed me, that could have been reason enough lol

[lifesgrandparade]

YOU HATE ANGELA?????????????????????????????????????? I used to put that song on right before I walked into the restaurant. It was calming, and got me ready to deal with the wacky hijinks of my blundering co-workers. Funny story, I watched some Taxi in the midst of the lockdown and I don't know if it was the first season jittters, but the first couple episodes were SO depressing. Even the studio audience felt like they were saying "Should we laugh at this?"

Re: The Natural? You've seen the baseball into the lights thing, you've seen the best part of the movie. Randy Newman does the score, and it's so solid that you hear it in commercials to this day, but it's not like... Short People got No Reason to Live or anything. It's not like *piano trill* "Lookit ol Roy, he took a bat from a boy, and hit that ball to the lights hey hey hey." It's like... too Movie Score-y. It's like everything else in the movie where it just tries too hard. I don't know. YOu're not missing anything. YOU SPECIFICALLY, aren't missing anything. This is a movie for guys with "NAVY DAD" hats to watch when the world war 2 documentary isn't on.

[lifesgrandparade]

@bbcwhereareyou Major League 2 was filmed at Camden Yards. If you squint you might see me in the crowd! Iv'e seen Major League 2 like.... 3 times? One of those times it was because I thought I was watching Major League 1 for 15 minutes and just said "Ah fuck it." Kind of offended actually that the filmmakers said "Eh, you skip the harbor and Baltimore kinda looks like Cleveland." First off Yeah Kinda, Second Off, How Dare you, we do NOT have that stink of failure. The worst parts of Baltimore have more World Series rings than fucking Cleveland. Three more Super Bowls as well.

Hell now that I think about it, maybe that's why the O's haven't gotten close to a World Series in that stadium. We exported Cleveland's bad vibes.

Back to the Natural. You know what really bothers me about it? People say Field of Dreams is hokey, and goodness gracious it is. Man is building a ball park in his Iowa farm, so he can play catch with his dad. Ultimate child of divorce fantasy. It is also takes a loooooooong way to get to its point. Can never tell if Kevin Costner is a bad actor or a bored one. or both. But i liek that it's a fantastical movie that tries to capture the spirit of baseball, centered around a guy who just wants to play catch with his dad. It does what it does MOSTLY effectively.

THe Natural is like, if Wagner wrote a Baseball Opera while wrestling with Covid 19.

[lifesgrandparade]

I think that kid was related to Barbara Mikulski. There's a LOT of Mikulskis in this town. This town is like little Krakow.

[chernobog13]

When there's a kaiju rampaging nearby, but you're not moving because you paid a non-refundable king's ransom for the wedding venue and photographer.

[lifesgrandparade]

@bbcwhereareyou That's such a wonderful little factoid that I almost feel ashamed that I'm going to say that I think THe Natural is one of the worst american sports movies ever made. In a genre that is packed to the brim with terrible films. Unlike most,The Natural tries, which makes it even worse. Everybody's good in it, the setpieces are amazing, the movie is dogshit boring for fifty fucking hours.

What I always ask, when someone says "The Natural" in response to favorite movies of all time (Something you hear less of nowadays. It's almost like I"m grateful nobody has an attention span anymore!) is... Do you like the movie The Natural, or do you like it when Robert Redford hits a home run into the goddamn lights while American Icon Randy Newman explores the studio space with the score? I love LA!

The movie is soooooooo fucking serious. It is glum, it is dour. I need to emphasize to anyone tht hasn't seen the Natural, this is a movie about a man with a magic baseball bat. It is Germany: Year Zero except there's a magic baseball bat. I get it. I do. But you could add a couple more jokes in is all I'm saying. But it's 2 hours of depression, and one minute where the guy gets off the magic bat narcotic and hits an American home run with a regular ol louisville slugger.

When I was in 4th grade, on the last day of the year, we had a choice of two movies that the teacher probably rented out her own damn self. One was The Natural, and the other was the Rocketeer. And goddamn, i used whatever political clout I had to tip the vote over to the Rocketeer. Andy Mikulski was pissed! Hey Andy, maybe if your great aunt was here you would've won the vote. But like... The Rocketeer is fun, action packed adventure where a guy with a rocket pack helps defeat Nazis with the help of the American Mob. "Go Get em Kid." The Natural would be no different from Social Studies. The older I get, the more I stand by it. Can you imagine 4th graders sitting and watching The Natural? There would've been a riot!

[cosmonautroger]

Nan Goldin, 1983

[lobbycards]

Action Jackson, Spanish lobby cards. 1988 Submitted by @videorecord