I'm sitting in my room with a bottle of water next to me. I open the book A Promised Land, by Barack Obama and turn on my speaker that's connected to my phone.
For about a year now I write to a man in prison in the USA. A man who is innocent, yet on death row. We hadn't spoken in a bit, but I received a new email from him this week. As big of a smile I could possibly have, appeared on my face when the notification popped up onto my phone. The man had not left my mind for months, even if I hadn't heard from him.
The email described that I was not forgotten, yet he thought I did forget about him. Life caught up, as we say. He asked if I could forgive him for not messaging me these past months and in the blink of an eye I write back, he shouldn't worry, I hadn't forgotten about him either and I ask how he has been. I press send and continue my days, Tuesday arrives, I get a new notification, it's him. I smile, I hope everything is well.
The email read as follows, he was doing okay, as we say, I mean what do you expect for someone who has been in confinement for decades... He writes that his thoughts get to him sometimes too, just like mine, and how overthinking is what he does too. He asks me what I want to ''get out'' of him because he doesn't have time to ''dillydally'' around, as he calls it. I understood the word, however, I had not heard that before, I catch myself softly giggling about the whole thing. I write back around 2 pages and press send again, I also attached two photos, one of me and one of my dogs. He wants to know who I am, and I truly want to get to know him too, if he lets me.
Back in January, I was scrolling through people's Instagram stories, when it popped up, a conversation with an inmate on death row. I was intrigued, interested, and must say a bit nervous. That didn't stop me, though. I signed up and I am glad I did. Hearing him speak was moving, the way he holds himself up, even though the system failed him heavily is inspiring. I remember watching it after midnight in my room, fully focused on the words that came out of my computer speakers. And in the end, it said, ''You can write him, just follow these steps'', which as you read, I did.