illegitimate sloth

call me slothy or lila. she/her. 30s ☆ opinionated sloth | sirius black and shoebill defender | prongsfoot propagandist | multishipper | intersectional feminist ☆ NO terfs thank you. I post mostly about the marauders and occasionally about birds.

[lilacella]

German Sirius & Remus Calendar Master Post

Chaos Amnesia AU masterlist:

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7a, Part 7b, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11

Hello hello,

You have reached the sloth blog. I mostly post about marauders (wolfstar, prongsfoot, sucius, jilypad, wolfstarbucks and who knows what else will turn up). Prongsfoot is my otp though.

I am not a fan of fanon characterizations of the marauders, so if you are looking for that you came to the wrong place I'm afraid. Also, obvs: FUCK JKR. We do not endorse the terfs on this blog. Scurry away and take your bioessentialism with you!

You can find some of my writing here or on my ao3.

More under the cut.

Other stuff I'm into:

I also am a big fan of birds but not in a ornithologist type of way, more like "i love all birds and like to learn fun facts about them!" My faves are the Shoebill Stork, all types of geese and ducks, corvids and the Harpy Eagle.

Other Fandoms:

Good Omens

Dead Boy Detectives

Our Flag Means Death

Stardew Valley

Sherlock Holmes (not the BBC show, the books. Though I did like the show)

Lord of the Rings

Discworld (is that a classical fandom? Idk)

Feel free to send me asks about any of these! My inbox is always open😊

_____

Tag guideline:

#marauders complaint department - where I complain about fanon. Block if you're sensitive to salt.

#writing sloth - me yapping about writing

#sloth rambles - me yapping about my life and anything else

#prongsfoot propaganda - a collection of my favorite prongsfoot posts. Og and reblogs

#moodboard monday - I post a pinterest moodboard every monday (until I grow tired of it). It's usually HP themed but I might branch out one day

_____

__ WIPs__

Bachelorettes, 2/5 chapters, Sapphic Prongsfoot dating show AU

Evil Secret, 3/? chapters, highly problematic Sucius

M is for Murder, ohhh what could this be what could this be?!

Man in the Mirror, Prongsfoot muggle soulmate AU

[icecreamwithjackdaniels]

Carl Jutz (German, 1838–1916), "Ducks by the Stream" (details)

[transgenderer]

every spelunker should go in with a cyanide tooth capsule so if they get stuck they can take the gentle way out instead of being tortured by the earth for 72 hours and then dying anyway

[transgenderer]

@kropotkindersurprise said:

it should be an explosive device, so they widen that part of the cave at the same time and no other spelunkers will get stuck there

beautiful vision. i love the idea of a minecraft-style world where if you explode underground it just clears a radius

[librarian-raichu]

I mean. That obviously wouldn’t work for many reasons, although I do believe if you required spelunkers to wear a suicide bomb to go caving, it would not be a major deterrent.

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

They'd be pissed off that the belt is too bulky and they can't squeeze through teeny tiny crevices that require you to avoid breathing until you're through or your ribs won't fit

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Personally I think we should make all spelunkers wear bulky vests like those people who tie a wooden spoon to a tiny dog's back so it can't slip through the bars of a property fence. Stop 'em from getting in those positions in the first place.

[diablo-sera-tops]

hey don't cry. blorbo coughing up blood

[diablo-sera-tops]

blorbo writhing in agony ok? don't cry

[diablo-sera-tops]

blorbo screaming so much their voice becomes hoarse and weak and the pain still won't stop

[diablo-sera-tops]

blorbo unable to close their eyes and avoid the visceral sight of their own body

[diablo-sera-tops]

blorbo suffering unimaginable pain and being powerless to stop it ok? ok

[mycupofrum]

James Potter campaigning for Sirius Black. Competency above all. 👨‍🎓

[campho-rousse]

In order: Post-hard launch Dan & Phil (1 & 2), Public Defender Dan + English Teacher Phil (3), Tomodachi Life Dan and Phil (4), Cat!Phil and Bear!Dan (5), Knight Dan and Princess Phil (6), Tortoise Metaphor Dan and Phil (7), Space Explorer Dan and Alien Phil (8), Phyuri (ft. Transfem!Phil)(9), Perphormative Phetus Dan(10), Basically I'm Gay reference (11), Fake IDGAFer Dan (12)

Like... Actual Soulmates

[east-south]

maybe they don't like being called names. have you ever thought about that

[lilacella]

Everytime I convince myself that I have a normal brain it pulls some sort of bullshit

[beardedmrbean]

[pelirro-hoe]

James definitely was Sirius's gay awakening and you can pry this headcanon from my cold, dead hands

[nyxunderwood]

My annual repost of this masterpiece

[plecotusauritus]

I feel insane when people try to tell me that there is simply no way to live without using AI and buying shit from Amazon

[in-flvx]

Thank you for the tag @plecotusauritus

Here's some prongsfoot first kisses

Secrets and honey

But when James paints into his skin there is no pain. It's pleasure. It's love. Sweet, like strawberries with pixie dust.

Hot, like Firewhiskey.

Time and space blurr, while James sits above him, marking Sirius as his.

It may be a dream, born from some hidden desire, when Sirius feels lips connecting with his own.

Sirius opens his eyes, face to face with James. Both sigh at the same time. And then Sirius closes the hair width of a span between their lips again. And they're kissing.

They are kissing.

Wholly and truly.

An Inn, Somewhere

Sirius steps up behind James, and pulls him into his arms. James can smell him now. His arms are wiry but strong. James leans back against him. Breathes into his hands. He can feel the soft warm breath of Sirius against his shoulder. They stay like this, breathing together for what feels like forever. James feeds the moment to the moon, to never forget it.

At some point, he turns around. Sirius' beautiful grey eyes reflect the moonlight, and James swallows hard. His heart is beating in his throat. A steady rhythm, leading him forwards. To offer, to claim.

Sirius' lips are firm, and soft, full against James' own. They move together in chaotic harmony, James loses himself in the sensation. His arms find the slim line of Sirius' waist, and feels himself getting hard when Sirius' breathing quickens. They press closer together. Closer. James gets to feel up the straight line of Sirius' back, feels the knobs of his spine, the soft arches of his chest. Sirius' long fingers find their way into James' hair, and now it's on him to moan at the feeling. Desire rages through James, setting all his nerve endings on fire.

Sirius' hot mouth kisses down to James' throat, while James walks them towards the bed. He sucks, he licks, and James gets to feel the shape of his teeth against his skin. Sirius reaches down, blindly opens James' fly. The pressure is gone only for a beat, before Sirius' hand cups him. His broad palm hot, and dry even through the fabric of James' pants.

And a little extra one:

Comet west

The finger that formerly had been on the tip of Sirius' nose, rests on Sirius' lips.

Their eyes lock.

James' eyes are alight, golden, as if lit from the inside out.

And Sirius is burning, burning, hoping it will never stop.

Sirius' head is moving with the quickening breath of James.

Sirius' eyelids flutter.

James puts a little more pressure on his finger.

And with all the courage, or none at all, Sirius presses the lightest of kisses to James' fingerpad.

Sirius and James are burning, their connection tearing into the fabric of the universe.

And Sirius knows, whatever kind of loss the comet may bring, this moment alone will have made it worth it.

@heartofspells @goldenlionprince @roalinda if you want to play

[emberemberhearts]

“i asked chat gpt” okay well i asked peter pettigrew and he told me james and lily’s address

[lilacella]

JUNE PHOTO DUMP

Thanks for the tag @plecotusauritus ❤️❤️

I spent the majority of June on campgrounds so enjoy some pictures of that. Also had some fun with my operating system (:

Tagging @polaroidcats and otherwise open tag for all!!

[creekfiend]

gender essentialism is soooo funny bc it's like "this is what women are like" and you're like "I've met women and many of them, if not the majority, have not been like that" and it's like "well women SHOULD be like that" and you're like "why should women be like that" and its like "because that's what women are like"

[lilacella]

"Second gym session after longer break" mood: what even is that muscle and why does it hurt??

[optional]

THE LORD OF THE RINGS The Return of the King | 2003