Hi I'm Kath. Nineteen years of existence in this amazing and messed up world. I'm an introverted bookworm who loves doing typographies and lettering during my leisure time. My hobbies include reading, writing, making art, binge watching. I'm an amateur artist and an aspiring author, TV & Film writer, creative producer, content creator & showrunner. I'm a day dreamer, completely untouched by reality. I am young, lost and confused. I am still trying to figure out who I am and what purpose I hold instead of just being a lost soul walking on the lands of Gaea and being an insurgent to society. Determined to find true happiness, I am ready to leave my comfort zone and satisfy my thirst for adventure. I'm a... ►Potterhead/Witch ►Demigod ►Shadowhunter ►Elleth from Middle Earth ►Narnian ►Runner ►Divergent ►Tribute ►Oncer ►Grounder ►Vampire ►Direwolf ►Evo/Mutant ♥ Silver Direwolf ♥ ♥ The Book Thief of Hogwarts ♥ ♥ Lost Girl of Neverland ♥ ♥ The Misfit of Wonderland ♥ ♥ The Ultimate Hybrid ♥ Hogwarts House: Slytherin ;) Godly Parent: More like Ancestor... I am Aphrodite's descendant. Disctrict: 1 Faction: Dauntless :D Glader Group: Runner Weapon: A wand that turns into any kind of weapon I like (bow and arrow, sword, lasso) ~TV Shows I'm obsessed with~ ►The 100 ►Once Upon A Time ►Teen Wolf ►The Flash ►Stranger Things ►Gotham ►The Vampire Diaries ►Supergirl ►The Walking Dead ►Riverdale ►Avatar: The Last Airbender ►Teen Titans ►Arrow ►Legends of Tomorrow ►Smallville ►The Big Bang Theory ►Pretty Little Liars ►Heroes Reborn ♥ I will go down with these ships ♥ ►Dramione ►Snowbarry ►Bellarke ►Zutara ►Karamel ►Clace ►Mileven ►Granielle* ►BatCat (Bruce Wayne x Selina Kyle) (Gotham) ►Stydia ►Allisaac ►Barney Stinson x Robin Sherbatsky ►Newtina ►Percabeth ►Captain Swan ►Feltson* ♥ Celebrity Crushes ♥ ►Tom Holland ►Timothee Chalamet ►Thomas Brodie Sangster ►Chandler Riggs ►Logan Lerman ►Nick Robinson ►Brenton Thwaites ►Nicholas Hoult ►Freddie Highmore ►Robbie Kay ►Dylan Sprayberry ►Dylan O'Brien ►Finn Wolfhard ►Zac Efron ►Tom Hiddleston (I have a long list of celebrity crushes, too many to mention) ♥ Fictional Crushes ♥ ►Nico diAngelo ►Carl Grimes ►Liam Dunbar ►Newt (The Maze Runner Series) ►Levi (Fangirl) ►Ezra Faulkner (The Beginning of Everything) ►R (Warm Bodies) ►Legolas ►Peter Pan ►Tommy Clarke (Heroes Reborn) (I have a long list of fictional crushes, too many to mention) ♥ Favorite Actresses ♥ ►Emma Watson ►Lily Collins ►Chloe Grace Moretz ►Kiernan Shipka ►Holland Roden ►Madelaine Petsch ►Kaya Scodelario ►Alycia-Debnam Carey ♥ Favorite Directors ♥ ►Christopher Nolan ►Wes Anderson ►Zack Snyder ►John Hughes ►Greta Gerwig ►Patty Jenkins ►Cathy Garcia Molina ►Greg Berlanti ►Irene Emma Villamor ♫ Artists/Bands I love because of their hella good songs ♫ ►Taylor Swift ►Ed Sheeran ►All Time Low ►Coldplay ►Panic! At The Disco ►Twenty One Pilots ►Fall Out Boy ►The 1975 ►The Script ►M83 ►HAIM ►Simple Plan ►Kodaline ►The Maine ►Of Monsters and Men ☼Favorite Movies☼ ►Peter Pan (2003) ►Warm Bodies ►Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist ►easy A ►Me and Earl and The Dying Girl ►The Breakfast Club ►Lady Bird ►Interstellar ►The Duff ►The Maze Runner ►Sixteen Candles ►The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones ►New Year's Eve ☼Favorite Movie Series☼ ►The Harry Potter Movie Series ►Middle Earth Movie Series ►DC Extended Universe ►Marvel Cinematic Universe ►The Maze Runner Movie Series ►Pirates of the Caribbean Movie ►X-Men Movie Series ☼Favorite Movie Soundtracks☼ ►Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist ►Paper Towns ►Warm Bodies ►Begin Again ►The Greatest Showman ☼Favorite TV Series Soundtracks☼ ►Teen Wolf ►Riverdale ►The Vampire Diaries ►Pretty Little Liars ►Stranger Things ☼Favorite Book Series☼ ►The Harry Potter Series ►Percy Jackson and The Olympians ►Heroes of Olympus ►The Maze Runner Series ►Middle Earth Series ☼Favorite Books☼ ►Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist ►The Beginning of Everything ►The Improbable Theory of Ana & Zak ►Anatomy of a Misfit ►Falling into Place ►Looking For Alaska ►Fangirl ►It's Kind of a Funny Story ►Perks of being a Wallflower // Words have the power to either inspire people or destroy them // ~Harry Potter~ ►Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light. ►In dreams, we enter a world that’s entirely our own. ►It is our choices… that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities. ►It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live. ►Numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it. ►Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right. ►We’ve all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That’s who we really are. ►It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be. ►I solemnly swear that I am up to no good ►Mischief Managed ►Mr. and Mrs. Dursley of Number Four Privet Drive where proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much ►It's LeviOsa, not LevioSA ►Sunshine Daises, Buttermellow, turn this stupid fat rat yellow ►Tha Chamber of Secrets has been opened, enemies of the heir beware ►You'll be next mudbloods! ►No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudblood ►I don't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me ►Why is it when there's trouble it is always you three? ►Believe me professor, I've been asking that question for six years ►Oh No! I've killed Harry Potter! ►You sort of start thinking anything’s possible if you’ve got enough nerve. ►To the well-organized mind, death is but the next great adventure. ►Don't let the Muggles get you down. ~Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit~ ►One ring to rule them all ►One does not simply walk into Mordor ►That there’s some good in this world, Mr. Frodo… and it’s worth fighting for. ►All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us ►A day may come when the courage of men fails… but it is not THIS day. ►They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard ►A red sun rises, blood has been spilled this night ►The battle of Helm's Deep is over; the battle for Middle-earth is about to begin. ►Moonlight drowns out all but the brightest stars ►I thought up an ending for my book. ‘And he lives happily ever after, till the end of his day ►In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit. ►I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone. ►The world is not in your books and maps, it’s out there ►Home is now behind you, the world is ahead! ►All that is gold does not glitter ►Not all who wander are lost ►If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world ►Where there's life there's hope ►I am fire. I am death ►I'm going on an adventure!
content: generally gender neutral reader, atsumu aged up, drinking, general fluff, physical contact/proximity (?), academic settings/tutoring
an: i thought of this right before leaving for work and had to wait my entire shift to come back and write it 💔
i lowk lost the plot during ushijima's so sorry, also this is a little longer than i anticipated but i hope you guys still like it
atsumu miya:
0:15 "i know that the bar closes at 11, i hope you never finish that beer"
working for the V. League was no joke- especially not for your position. you had been asked to step up as interim Division 1 event coordinator, since the person previously occupying that role had to take a sudden leave. that left you responsible for coordinating one of the League's biggest events- a tournament consisting of the Tachibana Red Falcons, the Schweiden Adlers, EJP Raijin, and the MSBY Black Jackals. four fan favorite teams, massive celebrity presence, and hundreds of schedules to consider.
saying that this project was rough would be an egregious understatement. obscene hours of overtime were put in, and by the second week of planning it, you'd already been on enough conference calls for a lifetime. obviously, between your persistence and support from your higher ups, it all came together beautifully. and for your labors, you were gifted tickets in the VIP section. whether courtside seats made up for months worth of stress was questionable, but seeing the fruits of your labors was the real reward.
once the event had wrapped up many hours later, you and your team wanted to keep that contagious buzz alive. and what better way than with liquor? many of the other various V. League staff had gone to grander and more expensive bars, but you and some close friends from event coordination/marketing decided to take it easy at a local pub.
some others had decided to hit the floor after a few drinks, but you were pacing yourself. in fact, you were kind of enjoying just sitting at the bar and being in the moment- cherishing the fact that you now had no deadline or task looming over you. you had reached a melancholy state of people-watching and nursing your drink, when a sudden commotion made you whip your head around.
people are cheering and crowding the door as a train of men, all in the same black and gold sports jacket, are entering. just when you thought you'd escaped work, it hunted you down in physical form. you'd be dumb to not recognize who they were between their signature colors and presence: the MSBY Black Jackals.
you observe as they all rush to ingest some amount of alcohol, even Sakusa Kiyoomi. you'd coordinated for him enough to know that crowds were not his scene- but it seemed he was being encouraged by a certain bleach-blonde to take down some liquid courage. only then did it strike you of how cold the establishment had become. as all of the guys were coming in, so was cold air. you hugged yourself a little tighter in your V. League jacket, watching them all eventually disperse and party just as causally as your coworkers were.
it was later and one of your friends had just left from sitting next to you, and where you expected absence, you saw broad shoulders and an undercut. "sorry, hope i'm not intrudin'- just waitin' for my drink 'n i'll be outta yer hair," he apologizes. you only respond with a sort of blank stare, wondering why that would be the first thing he says. he catches it and continues, "seen ya sitting here a while, 'n i wasn't sure if you wanted to be alone or not. butttt, this was kinda the only open spot."
"ohh ok, i understand," you say loosely, with the small amount you've drinken buzzing in your chest. "you're totally good. in fact, you kinda keep me employed, so do as you please," you joke. now it's his turn to offer a puzzled look. you quickly rotate your torso to show off the emblem on your jacket. "i work for the V. League, actually just got thrown into a role for the Division 1 stuff," you explain.
"ohh okay, so you're pretty high up in the food chain then. put in a good word for me, will ya?" he chides.
"you're atsumu miya, the face of one of the biggest teams in the League. i promise you don't need a good word," you retort. "besides, i'm honestly where i am by a fluke."
"that's nonesense, gorgeous," he insists. he hasn't even realized what he's called you, likely in the same hazy state that you are.
you go on to explain everything- you're just an interim, and all you got for months of stress was courtside tickets. the story seems unamusing to you, but he listens intently like a dog watches its treat. he's still atsumu- painfully so. he'll interrupt with his own stories and crack childish jokes, but both of you find it endearing in your tipsy states. you both have finished your drinks by the time your conversation dies down. just as it does, the bartender announces last call. you look at your smartwatch in shock, wondering just how late you and him had stayed. it displays 11:01pm.
"kinda early for last call, don't ya think?" he remarks. "yeah, a little," you agree, and something melancholy settles over the two of you. does last call really mean you have to leave this behind? is it just the alcohol talking, or attraction? in a last ditch effort, you pull out a business card. this is about the only time you're grateful that you have them stored everywhere. "well, you obviously know who i am now. keep doing your work being in the spotlight, but if you want behind-the-scenes help, you can always talk to me," you offer with a shy smile.
you think nothing of this until you wake up to new messages from an unsaved contact.
unknown number: 11:13am
i may not need business advice but i definitely need to see you again
if you're ok with that of course
if so i'll take ya somewhere that closes a lot later than 11 😉
shinsuke kita:
1:29 "yeah i'd love it if you walked me home, if you promised we could go real slow"
you never realized how important it would be that you and shinsuke kita shared a nutrition class together. sure, you knew of him, having attended the same school for a year- but you'd never been formally introduced.
on the first day of your shared class, the teacher insisted on doing icebreakers (to everyone's dismay.) the two of you were put together for it, naturally. "um, hi," you greeted him. "i've seen you around school before, but remind me of your name?" you ask.
"shinsuke kita," he replies, "and what about yourself?"
"i'm y/n l/n," you respond. "you're a third year, right?"
"yeah, i am. you're not in my grade, are you?" he inquires.
"no, no, i'm a second year," you confirm. there's an awkward beat of silence before you move onto another question. "sorry if this is forward, but i wanted to ask why you chose to take this class?"
he nods before his reponse. "i'm on the volleyball team, and as their captain, i want to know how to better fuel my team."
"ohh okay, i see that," you oblige. "i mean, i feel like you guys are already doing a lot of stuff right, no? you placed second in nationals last year," you recount.
this ilicits the beginnings of a smile and interest from the quiet boy. "yeah, we did pretty well. i still think this class' materials could offer us something new, though."
"oh, for sure. that kinda relates to why i'm taking this class, too. i'm hoping to go into sports analytics post-graduation," you begin. "teams always have to reinvent themselves and stay interesting to stay on top."
"yeah, something like that." his eyes have a kind softness to them upon you opening up.
it takes a couple of weeks of small talk before he finally proposes something. it's right before class ends. "remember when you said that teams need to 'reinvent themselves' to stay on top?" he asks. "during icebreakers."
"yeah, vaugely. what about it?" you ask.
"coach and i were talking about how we didn't have a manager last year. i brought you up, and if you're interested, he said he'd like to have you come take that on," he reveals. "it would be good where you want to go into sports analytics, too."
"wow, you remembered that?" something flutters in your chest. he nods in return, as if it was no big feat. "yeah, i mean, that sounds great. you might have to help me pick up the rules and tactics or whatever, though," you beam.
"that's no problem. just come to the gymnasium after school," he instructs.
and so you do. it's kind of nerve racking, walking into an echoing gym full of rather tall and rowdy boys. however, you find kita and their coach, and the rest of the afternoon goes smoothly. well, as smoothly as it can go with osamu and atsumu fighting. and rintaro recording them. it doesn't scare you though- if anything, it makes you feel as though they're already comfortable with you. you know you'll be less scared to give them advice and corrections like this.
you've stayed after practice to complete your managerial duties, and kita the same for his captain's duties. everything looks just about done, so you go to check in with him. "hey, kita, do we need to do anything else?"
"no, that should be everything. which is good, because it's starting to get dark," he observes.
"okay, sounds good!" you return, going to grab your things.
"if you don't mind, i'd like walk you home. we ended up going later than planned," he suggests.
"yeah, that sounds really nice, actually. thank you," you reply.
on the walk home, he becomes more talkative than you'd expect. you've seen one side of him- the methodical, intentional side driven by routine. however, you learn that a side like that is not mutually exclusive to this new other side. it makes sense, actually. if he wants to get to know someone, he gets to know them well. if they want to know about him, they get to know about him truthfully. captains and managers work closely together on teams anyway.
by the end of the walk, your relationship doesn't feel so professional and surface-level. you illicit chuckles out of one another and share philosophies. you realize just how lucky you'd be to get to do this every day, and hope that tomorrow, he walks a little slower and talks a little longer.
wakatoshi ushiijima:
1:39 "i've been dropping hints all night that i'd love it if you held my hand, goddamn"
you've always preferred keeping to yourself and concentrating your energy on your own ambitions. this doesn't mean that you're inherently antisocial or unapproachable- you do have your own friends and connections. however, this behavior has allowed you to climb Shiratorizawa's academic rankings.
you were doing this while also taking some of the most challenging and abstract courses the school offers, as well. not many people would take on calculus, physics, western literature, and art history all together. it was a blessing and a curse that you were one of the only students who understood what was going on in those classes.
not many of your friends were in western literature with you, understandably so. as you packed up your belongings alone to transition to your next class, you noticed that the sun that was beaming on you had been blocked. you looked up to see olive eyes and hair- and a rather intimidating frame. wakatoshi ushijima, obviously.
"hello, i'd like to ask you for something," he begins. you two had had plenty of classes together before, being in the same grade and maintaining relatively similar academics.
"yeah okay, what is it?" you inquire. you swallow, feeling a little physically cornered. you're sure it isn't intentional, and figure that he probably can't help that his presence is as striking as it is.
"these past few units have been challenging. i know you understand this content well, and i'd like to better my knowledge of it before it becomes too weak."
"oh ok, i see," you acknowledge. "you probably need to keep your grades really high, too. for volleyball," you prod.
"yes. coach washijo makes no exceptions. he can be frightening despite his stature," ushijima explains. this gets a nice laugh out of you, and the tension in your shoulders settles.
"yeah ushijima, that sounds fine. do you want to just take my phone number and then message me when you find a convenient time to meet up?"
"that sounds reasonable."
the first thing you message him about is what content he's needing help with. you figure it'll save you and him some valuable time, given how demanding volleyball is.
y/n: 3:42pm
hi ushijima, i just wanted to know what exact units/topics you'd want to focus on most? i'll prepare some stuff before our first session
ushijima: 5:13pm
Pardon my late response. I had practice. Units 3 and 4 would be preferable.
y/n: 5:17pm
don't worry about it! that sounds fine, do you know what a good date/time would be?
ushijima: 6:30pm
We train until 12:30 on Saturday. If you wanted to come over following that, I could acommodate that.
y/n: 7:01pm
sounds great :) i'll see you then!
ushijima: 7:05pm
ushijima liked your message: "sounds great :) i'll see you then!"
he had spoken to you on a tuesday, so you still had a couple days of class together. you'd become a little more comfortable with each other, offering small smiles in passing or pencils when you'd lost them. you found, to your dismay, that something in your chest fluttered a little harder every time you saw him. it was almost embarassing how quickly he'd caught your attention, and the worst part was, he didn't even know it.
when saturday came, you were just short of a nervous wreck. you weren't sure how casual or formal to dress, what he'd be wearing, any of it. but you acknowledged that you two may not cross paths after this year anyway, and that you were at least confident in what you'd be teaching.
he let you in once arriving, and to your relief, he was dressed in casual athletic wear. as you two got started, you found yourself falling into some nervous habits: talking a little faster than usual, mussing with your hair, and tapping a finger against the table. at one point, you'd reached across to point something out and accidentally grazed his hand. he was unbothered, of course, but remarked, "you take good care of your hands." you paused, waiting on an explanation to that random remark. "your cuticles are orderly, and your hands are soft. it is important to take care of yourself," he elaborates.
"oh yeah, i guess it does feel good to have that stuff done now that you mention it," was your attempt at responding. he simply nodded and allowed you to continue teaching.
it was odd how close you two had to be to teach him. you were basically leaning into his side at some points to map out certain compositions and definitions. however, he never pushed you away. and when you looked up at him throughout the lesson, you could see a tinge of pink dusting his ears. you could always tell that there were things he'd leave unsaid when looking at him. however, though his expression today was similar, there was something softer to it.
upon finishing the lesson, he walked you back out of his house.
"i'd like it if you'd come over again," he requested. "today was productive. you are a good teacher," he complimented.
that was all you needed. maybe next time you went over, now being more comfortable, you could throw out and catch more hints. he might finally understand the beginning of your feelings for him, and might even miraculously express his own. you surely wouldn't mind teaching him that.
reblogs/likes are appreciated <3
not proofread. do not feed uniquecalicocritter's works into any generative AI software, plagarize them, or translate them.
The plan had been simple: you and your friends agreed to meet at one of the food booths in the gymnasium before their match. It had seemed straightforward enough that you confidently told them you'd be fine finding it on your own.
Unfortunately, you seem to have severely underestimated your horrible sense of direction.
You’re currently standing in a deserted hallway, having somehow gotten so lost that you couldn’t even hear the noise from the stands anymore. They need more maps of this place, it's Nationals for God's sake, you think, huffing, as you swivel your head around, looking for something—anything—that could guide you to where you need to be.
You look down at your phone for the umpteenth time, confirming the time of the match you were there to see and which court you needed to go to. You groan, biting your thumbnail as you debate admitting to your best friend that you were lost. Unfortunately for your pride, desperation wins out, and you resign yourself to the teasing you'll face as you open your messages app.
You: Hey, I think I'm super lost right now
You: Send help 😭
You: Plz I beg 😭😭😭
You sigh as you watch the loading symbol by your texts, holding your phone up and turning around to try and catch a good signal. After what feels like forever, the message is finally sent, and you bite your lip and stare anxiously at the phone screen, waiting for a response. Fortunately, you don’t have to wait long, phone pinging as a message comes in a few minutes later with a screenshot of a map of the gymnasium with an X marking the agreed upon designated meeting location. You're busy studying the directions your friend sent when you hear a voice from behind, startling you.
"Hey, you look cute in that jacket, but you'd look better in mine."
You startle from your phone and whip around, eyes wide in confusion, "I'm sorry?"
A tall boy, in a volleyball uniform and awfully bleached hair that could really use some toner, leans against the wall in front of you, arms crossed and lips curved into a cheeky grin.
"I said you look cute in that jacket, but I'd bet you'd look cuter in mine."
You blink at him, trying to process the words he just said because what a ridiculous thing to say, you almost laugh. You look down at your jacket, a simple jacket in your favorite color, and then at his team jacket.
Is he flirting? you wonder. No, that can't be right, you think, as you realize who he is. There's no way someone like Miya Atsumu would randomly flirt with you, a total stranger.
So, you ask, "Is this some sort of weird school promotion?" Your eyebrows furrow. "Sorry, but I'm not interested. I’m already a student at—"
"No, wait!" Miya Atsumu jumps up as you turn to leave, desperation creeping up in his voice, "It's not a school promotion!"
"Then what is this, I don't understand," you say slowly, searching his face for an answer.
"I'm uh," he scratches the back of his head, suddenly flustered, and then blushes. "I'm just trying to say you're cute."
Oh.
Oh.
You could have fun with this.
You look back down at your jacket, lifting your arms to inspect it. "So I wouldn't be cute without it?" you tease.
"No!" his eyes widen and he quickly shakes his hands as though to swat the idea away. "I think you'd be cute in anything."
He's really blushing now, you note, biting back a laugh. It's kind of cute if you're being completely honest. He’s a good-looking guy: tall, with a pretty face, and muscular to boot—if you were into that sort of thing. He also has an off-court reputation for being an “arrogant asshole,” as you've heard your best friend put it, so seeing him behave this way is hilarious to you. You probably shouldn't, but you can't resist the temptation to keep teasing him.
"But I'd be cuter in your jacket?"
Something flickers over Miya Atsumu's face, and for a moment you wonder if you went too far with it, because now he looks like he's going to pass out and you have no idea how you would explain that to his team.
"Yeah," he says breathlessly, finally looking into your eyes.
Now it's your turn to heat up.
"Oh," you simply say. You never expected him to be so…honest about it. He's got these warm puppy eyes and a small, hopeful smile as he looks at you—the butterflies are simply inevitable.
You’re not really sure what to say next and he shifts awkwardly, seeming increasingly more nervous with the silence.
"He was flirting," you finally mutter quietly to yourself, but he picks up on it.
"Yeah," he affirms sheepishly, "I was."
You can't help but let a small laugh slip through your lips. The whole situation feels surreal. Miya Atsumu, the one from the magazines your friends liked to read, the matches they studied late into the night, and one of the most recognized high schoolers in all Japan was here in the flesh, flirting with you. Not that you didn't have your fair share of accomplishments, but hey, you didn't have pro-level teams lining up to snatch you up as soon as you graduate. "Who would've thought the Miya Atsumu would be interested in silly old me?” You muse with a chuckle.
At that, the mentioned boy does a double-take. "You've heard of me?"
"Oh Miya," you snort. "You're like, super famous in the high school volleyball world. I don't think there's anyone at this tournament who hasn't heard of you.”
"You watch volleyball?" He peers at you curiously.
"Not usually," you say, a coy smile on your lips, "But today, I'm here to support my friend."
"Who's your friend? He must be good if he made it to nationals," he smirks, regaining his cheeky persona from before, leaning in toward you, his arms folded over his chest.
"Mm," you hum, tilting your head up to maintain eye contact as you smirk in return. "Yeah, he's pretty good. I don't think I'll tell you who he is quite yet though, at least, not until he plays you."
"You seem pretty confident he’ll get that far," Miya teases.
Your grin spreads wider, "Yeah, I'm pretty confident." They're one of the favored to win, you almost add, but you bite your tongue. It'll be a lot more fun to see his reaction once he figures it out on his own.
"I hope so," Atsumu throws a wink at you and you laugh. "Will you go out with me when I win against him then?”
"’When’ you win?" You raise an eyebrow and laugh. The confidence level of this guy never fails to astound you. "I knew that humility had to be a facade. But sure, I’ll go on a date with you if you win."
Atsumu seems a bit surprised, as though he never really expected you to accept, but his eyes soften as his grin grows into a genuine smile.
Pretty, you think.
"I look forward to it then."
—
Fifteen minutes and a little help from Atsumu later, you finally locate your friend, jogging up to him with a grin.
"Hey Omi, you'll never believe who I just met.”
Thank you to @chlosology and @jamongcha for beta reading this for me!
your daughter had technically met rin plenty of times before— back when she was still a newborn baby asleep in sae’s arms or a toddler too young to remember much of anything. but now, at four years old, this was the first time she was old enough to truly understand who he was.
even then, she still spent the first few minutes of your visit hiding behind sae’s leg while rin stood awkwardly in the doorway with his arms crossed, looking just as unsure of what to do with her.
“say hi to uncle rin,” you encouraged softly.
your daughter peeked out from behind sae, gave rin a tiny wave, then immediately hid behind sae again.
rin simply stared at her in complete bewilderment before awkwardly lifting one hand. “… h-hi there.”
sae snorted beside you, the corners of his lips twitching upward.
“pfft, relax a little,” he remarked dryly.
the entire afternoon was painfully awkward. rin had absolutely no idea how to interact with children, and your daughter was too shy to say more than three words at a time. well that was, until, she noticed the soccer ball sitting in the corner of his apartment.
“u-uncle rin, can i play with that?”
rin blinked, clearly not expecting the question. “… uh, sure, i guess.”
big mistake.
because from that moment onward, she followed him around like a tiny shadow; eagerly showing off every drawing, toy & new trick she’d learned as though she’d known him her entire life (which she technically did). the initial shyness she'd carried into his apartment had completely vanished, and was replaced by a childlike curiosity & an eagerness to be around him.
for the rest of the trip, she was practically glued to him.
“uncle rin, look at my drawing!”
“uncle rin, watch me jump!”
“uncle rin, can you carry me?”
and rin, who swore he’d never be the type to entertain children— somehow ended up carrying her on his shoulders through the park while your husband nearly died laughing behind them.
“can’t believe you’ve become such a softie.”
rin glared at his older brother, cheeks heating up. “… s-shut up.”
“you’re literally holding her stuffed animal,” sae pointed out, barely containing his grin.
“w-well, she asked me to!” rin mumbled defensively, tightening his grip on the plushie in question.
. . .
before any of you realized it, the last day of your trip had arrived.
your daughter sat on the living-room floor, carefully packing away the crayons, stickers & little souvenirs she'd collected over the past few days while you zipped up the last suitcase nearby. across the room, sae was busy checking your flight information.
rin, meanwhile, lingered by the doorway with his hands shoved into his pockets, quietly watching as his niece rambled excitedly about all the things she wanted to do the next time she visited japan.
he'd spent years convincing himself that children were loud, exhausting & impossible to understand. yet somehow, after only a few days— the apartment already felt a little too quiet knowing she was about to leave.
right as you were about to head out the door, your daughter wrapped her tiny arms around rin's leg and softly asked, "... uncle rinnie! when will you come visit us in spain?"
rin froze.
both you & sae exchanged looks because this was the first time either of you had ever seen him genuinely speechless. after a few seconds, rin awkwardly patted her head before muttering, “… s-soon.”
your daughter’s entire face lit up at his words. “promise?”
rin hesitated for only a second before giving her the smallest nod.
“yeah, i promise…”
satisfied with his answer, she finally let go of his leg and hurried back towards you & sae, clutching the stuffed animal rin had bought for her against her chest. “papa!” she whispered excitedly, tugging on sae’s pinky finger. “uncle rin says he’s gonna visit us soon!~”
sae glanced over at his younger brother, who immediately looked away in embarrassment.
“… really?” he replied, the faintest hint of amusement tugging at his lips. “that’s good to know.”
𝐞𝐯𝐚’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 💌 ⸝⸝⸝ sorry for the lack of updates y’all 🙂↕️
PREMISE: There must be a guy out there that understands a woman's heart just a little! And your boyfriend might just be that with a small exception ; how a habit of theirs gets the both of you into a silly scandal!
wordcount: 3.2k (around 1k for each) | content & warnings: reader is referred to as "girlfriend" + usage of she/her pronouns, reader owns a purse, crackfick, teasing, joking, banter ; headcanons followed by scenarios
AUTHOR'S NOTE: love options is trending and rightfully so. its so catchy
RIN ITOSHI | 糸師凛
When you first started dating Rin was pretty new to all the relationship stuff.
He’d be awkward during physical affection. Quite literally stiffening when you’d hug him as a greeting. You think that even holding hands might have been too much for Rin at first, but over time as the two of you spent more time with each other and got more used to each other, Rin warmed up to you.
Still there were some habits of your early relationship phase that transcended over to your current relationship. Whenever Rin didn’t know how to behave around you, but still wanted to show you affection, he always insisted on carrying your purse.
Honestly, it was pretty cute. When you’d bring it, teasingly, Rin would just scoff and tell you not to bother with such lukewarm things, but it slowly turned into a habit. It was a gesture that made Rin show his love for you without having to verbally express it.
You didn’t even have to ask, Rin would always hold your purse. Whether that be on dates, on the way to the grocery store or to practice games. Rin would never let you carry it—he’d rather be a dead man. Seriously you’d have your purse slouched over your shoulder and he’d give you a stare that practically said “over my dead body.”
Now that you think about it, Rin was kind of like a puppy that would get territorial over their favourite toy—not that you’d ever tell Rin. Who would carry your purse then? Honestly, it’d still be him (who else?), because he can’t stand the thought of you thinking him as unreliable.
You can’t help but think that it also is some kind of an ego thing for Rin—having you rely on him makes him feel like a good boyfriend who’s able to take care of you. And honestly? It was really endearing, so you just continued to let him hold your purse.
There wasn’t ever an occasion where you’d have to carry your purse alone, at least not if Rin was around. But when the chance was given you took it, just to see how Rin would react.
Date night with Rin was something you'd always look forward to, this time especially. When the both of you decide to leave to go home you take your purse and slip it onto your arm. Normally Rin would take your purse to hold it for you, he’d never admit it but he’d be offended if you wouldn’t let him help you, so his reaction is no wonder.
“Stop that right now.” grumbles under his breath, his eyebrows furrowing together in irritation. “What?” You hum, pretending to be oblivious. “That.” His eyes drift downwards to where your purse rests in your arm. “What’s wrong with my arm?” You ask in disbelief and Rin just groans in annoyance. He most likely caught up to your scheme and you have to bite the inside of your cheek to refrain from laughing. “You know what I mean.” Acting confused by his words you tilt your head to the side. “Enlighten me.”
Rin practically yanks the purse off your arm and you tumble back against your seat, the cushioned material softening your fall. “Someone’s in a foul mood.” You joke and give him a knowing look. “It’s enough.” He remarks and you can’t help but frown playfully. “But Rin, it’s not even that heavy. Like seriously, it’s not a lot.” Your boyfriend's last thread of patience starts to loosen. “No more of this.” He says flatly and the corners of your mouth start to twitch.
Before you can drop the act, one of the servers comes up to your table.“Miss, are you alright?” You know you can order as much as you like. It’s on the house then.” It’s only then that you notice that the people around you are staring at Rin and you. They’re whispering and exchanging worried glances among each other. However when Rin gives them a dirty look they turn their heads away quickly and continue to poke around in their food.
Mental note to yourself: Rin’s PR team works hard, but the press works harder.
RIN ITOSHI SEEN ARGUING WITH GIRLFRIEND IN PUBLIC? THE YOUNG FOOTBALL PRODIGY HAS SUPPOSEDLY FAT-SHAMED HIS GIRLFRIEND FOR ORDERING TOO MUCH FOOD TELLS US A TRUSTED SOURCE: CLICK HERE TO READ MORE !
The both of you are already lying in bed, his arm resting over your waist. Distracted by the game he’s analysing before going to sleep, Rin doesn't notice the article you're reading.
Only when he hears you laugh does he lower the volume of the TV a little before facing you. You show him the article and put a hand over your mouth, muffling your laugh—it’s obvious that you find it quite hilarious.
Rin doesn't even need to read the whole article, the title alone is enough to piss him off. He grabs one of the pillows before softly tossing them at you and your laughter continues.
“What’s so funny about that anyway.” You just shake your head, cheeks hurting from how much you were laughing. “Tsk.” Rin grabs your phone and turns it off before putting it on the nightstand. “These lukewarm losers don’t even know what they’re talking about.” You swat his arm away before sitting up. “Oh, so you’re not even denying it?” There’s a tilt of teasing to your words and Rin rolls his eyes. “Only idiots would care about something like that.”
He pulls you into his embrace and you melt into him. “I’d never do that shit. What you eat is the least of my concerns and I know you can take care of yourself, so eat what you want.” It was rare for Rin to be this expressive and you can’t help but grin in happiness. “But, you like taking care of me.” You remind him before pressing a chaste kiss to the underside of his jaw. “Yeah, so let me carry your purse next time.” He nuzzles his face into the crown of your head and you simply hum in agreement.
“Gotcha.”
NAGI SEISHIRO | 凪誠士郎
When your boyfriend would stay over at your place, he’d use your expensive hair products, not to mention A LOT of it. However you’d always accentuate how it’s an exception that he gets to use them.
If you were to ever catch him using it without your permission you’ll start throwing hands at him.
But he didn’t stop. He said it was a hassle to bring his own shampoo and that he likes your smell, so what?
It got worse when you moved in together, to the point where you had to hide your shampoo in your room, your conditioner somewhere in the depths of the bathroom drawers that Seishiro and you never really bothered to clean and your hair mask was hidden somewhere in between the folded towels.
Luckily for you, that seemed to do the trick, because after that he’d no longer smell like whipped vanilla and soft cashmere.
Admittedly, him using your products because of their price wasn’t the only reason, the other and actually real one, was that for some reason the products smelled better on him than they ever did on you??? You doubt that Nagi would even care that much if you’d told him that, however it was very much a BIG deal for you.
After all, you can’t have your boyfriend smelling better than you, right??? Especially if you share the same products!
Summer was unbearable, but so was winter. A few months ago you wished that summer would come sooner and now that it’s here you should’ve just lived in the freezing cold for a little longer. With that knowledge you dragged your boyfriend outside to enjoy the last bits of summer as long as you can.
There wasn’t really something you had in mind, but as you took a stroll around your local park you saw an ice cream vendor and just couldn’t resist yourself. Plus points because it also helped you cool off.
Walking hand in hand with Seishiro was comforting and warm, actually, maybe a bit too warm, but you didn’t mind. When Nagi lets go of your hand to throw away the stick of his icicle in the nearby trashcan you notice a leaf stuck to his snowy hair.
“Sei, you have something in your hair.” You mention, eyes glinting with curiosity as you glance up at him. He doesn’t even have to ask what your intentions are, just hums and bends down in compliance for you to remove it. Amused by his adherence, you reach forward to pick the leaf out of his hair, by doing so catching a whiff of his shampoo.
He smelled good. Really sweet and cozy, like a scent you could get used to. Matter of fact—where have you smelled that familiar scent before? And that's when it hit you—
“Seishiro!” You yell, dumbfounded by what he’s done. Eyes widening in shock and slightly backing away from him to create distance. “What?” Your boyfriend shakes his head to clear it of any further plants that could somehow have gotten stuck in his hair. “Which shampoo did you use?” You ask cautiously, eyes narrowing to scrutinize his face. To your dismay, he doesn’t show much of a reaction besides a simple shrug of the shoulders.“I dunno, I just grabbed the first battle I got my hands onto.” He says and cocks an eyebrow at you. “Why do you ask?”
“Oh my God.” You whisper more to yourself than him. His response hits you like a truck, because how could you have been so clumsy? The other day you were so caught up with your everything-shower you forgot to hide all your products afterwards. That’s how Seishiro must have gotten his hands on your shampoo. “Do you understand the gravity of the situation?” You step forward on your tip toes and put your hands on his shoulders—well, barely—to get him to look at you. “You’re confusing me.” He simply says, face blank and question marks comically popping up all over his head.
“Seishiro.” You practically groan in frustration before face palming yourself. Left in the dark, your boyfriend just stands there in confusion.
As soon as you got home you took a shower, firstly because you wanted to check how much of your product was left and secondly because this heat was unbearable. When you were done you tucked the products away in their usual hiding spots, before going into the living room where Seishiro already sat on the sofa. With how focused he looked you didn’t even have to guess what he was doing and as you glanced over to the TV your suspicions were confirmed. Once again he was immersed in playing video games. Cute.
He doesn’t take his eyes off the screen, but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t notice your presence. “You got a message while in the shower.” He nods at your phone that lays on the coffee table in front of him and you can’t help but smile. As if on instinct, Seishiro moves to make space for you on the sofa, despite there being plenty. He always enjoyed having you near him, no matter where he was or what he was doing. “It’s from Reo.” You say and Seishiro hums to let you know that he’s listening.
What could Reo possibly want from you? You unlock your phone with one hand as the other continues to pat dry your hair with the towel.
Opening your unread messages, you see that Reo has sent you a link. Beneath it was a message of his own. His message reads: “i told him to drop the 3 in 1 shampoo smh” Curious about the meaning of his words you open the link and whatever you were expecting certainly wasn’t that.
SEISHIRO NAGI REEKS! SPOTTED OUTSIDE WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND THE FOOTBALL PLAYER APPEARS CONFUSED WHEN HIS GIRLFRIEND LOOKS DISGUSTED AS SHE SMELLS HIS HAIR! INTERESTED? FIND MORE HERE!
The noise from the screen dies down, a sign that Seishiro has stopped playing. Luckily for you your hair shields you from his view point, hiding the big smile that’s plastered on your face. Without any comment you show him the article, in response to seeing it, he simply sighs.
“I don’t reek.” Seishiro groans, pulls you onto his lap and nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck. “Yeah, that better be the case, especially when you’re using my products.” You scoff before slithering your arms around his waist, your face pressed against his chest and inhaling his scent.
SAE ITOSHI | 糸師冴
Sae never really understood the purpose of social media, but he wasn’t one to spoil your fun and still listened to your ramblings about how you didn’t know which picture to choose to post on your story
When he told you that “you look the same” on each of them you got mad at him and slapped his shoulder
Due to his poor wording he had to repeat his words, what he actually meant was that you looked pretty in every picture, so it shouldn’t really matter which one you post
However, posting yourself was one thing. Posting Sae was a whole new universe, because no one ever believed that you were really dating Sae
Why? Oh, simple. Sae lets all his social media accounts be managed by his PR team which meant that he never likes your stories, posts or reposts any of the stories that you tag him in
To make things better: he didn’t even follow you—Sae’s PR team removed all his following which just made you look like A) a parasocial and obsessive fan with stalker like tendencies or B) a neglected girlfriend that needs to be pitied, because her boyfriend gives her the cold shoulder
Both weren’t true, at least partially. Firstly, you and Sae have been together for a long time and also made public appearances together, secondly, Sae was a great boyfriend, well, with the exception that he doesn’t follow you, likes your stories or reposts them—yes, you’re bitter about that, so maybe the rumors aren’t that wrong. (They are.)
However, some people would always read too much into things and would stir up drama or maybe they were aware and just wanted to create drama for the fun of it—whatever the reason it didn’t quite help your and Sae’s predicament. His PR basically rubbed more salt into the wound, by reposting a post of a sports event Sae recently attended. Coincidentally both Sae and a rising female football player were in the photo together.
Usually this wouldn’t be a problem, if it weren’t for the fact that said athlete had expressed her interest towards Sae in a recent interview. She made it clear that she admired him and looked up to him, but somehow fans decided to twist her words and internet rumors started to circulate.
Of course, his fans thought that Sae reposted the post and was secretly hinting at something. When it was in fact his PR team that messed up and should’ve done their research better. After all, there had always been a few fans who joked about how Sae didn’t even follow you, unfortunately this joke quickly snowballed into an internet debate whether Sae was cheating on you or not and just soft launched his new partner.
People started bashing Sae for being a disloyal asshole, then there were people who pointed out that it was so obvious that you and Sae broke up, others speculated that maybe Sae and you were maybe never dating to begin with, you just played with his feelings and that Sae deserved better—it took some time and nerve for you to ignore that comment. However there were also comments that said that you deserved better which did make up for it. You liked them on your private account for the sole reason of pissing Sae off.
Safe to say, the post didn't make it better and his PR team was now cleaning up after the mess they caused, deleting the story and going as far as releasing a statement. But what’s posted on the internet, stays on the internet forever. It didn’t take long for the first posts to appear, evidenced by screenshots, interactions in public and other stupid things people were trying to take apart and nitpick.
The two of you had just finished dinner, you were sitting at the dining table, enjoying a glass of Kombucha, while Sae was in the kitchen rinsing the dishes. You were just mindlessly scrolling around until an article pops up on your feed and it immediately catches your interest.
SAE ITOSHI CAUGHT CHEATING? GOING FROM A FOOTBALL PLAYER TO A PLAYER ! UNLOYAL TO HIS COUNTRY AND GIRLFRIEND !!! FOR THE FULL ARTICLE WITH PROOF CLICK HERE! SUBSCRIBE TO GET AN EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW FROM YOUNGER ITOSHI BROTHER, RIN ITOSHI AND HIS THOUGHTS!
As you read the last sentence you can’t help but laugh, choking on the Kombucha while doing so. You can’t believe that they even dragged Rin into this. Upon hearing the sound of your coughing, Sae rushes over to your side to check up on you, only to find you smirking and giving him a smug look that indicates trouble. He’s furrowing his eyebrows and asks. “What is it this time?” You don’t answer him, all you do is show him your phone and the rest is for him to figure out. (Not like it’s hard.)
Instead of showing him the article, you show him your story that’s uploading right now. Sae squints his eyes together to make out what the text on your story says, although he wishes he didn’t.
Your newly posted story shows the article you’ve read. To make matters worse—much worse for Sae—you tagged his account and wrote “This is how I find out???” Obviously meant as sarcasm, but he’s sure that some of these delusional reporters and journalists will use your story to create some other shitty article.
“Delete that.” He says plainly, not asking, but demanding. You just shake your head and give him a playful smile. “Nah, let’s wait. Maybe a new article will emerge from this. Best believe I’m gonna repost that too.” Just like he expected. Sae pinches his nosebridge in annoyance, before stealing your phone out of your hand to delete the story on his own.
He doesn’t say anything as he takes out his phone from the pockets of his pants. Without a warning he grabs your hand and puts it onto the dining table, his right next to it. With a precision only Sae could achieve, he takes a meticulous photo. No—not just an ordinary one, the photo is clearly supposed to point at the matching promise rings you and Sae wear. The photo goes straight to his story and you laugh.
It’s quite endearing. You brought up the idea of promise rings a few months ago because you saw a cute pair at your favourite jeweler. What you didn’t plan on was Sae taking your idea so seriously and going as far as ordering customized rings. They were quite simple, but you liked them a lot.
As he finished uploading his story you decide to tease Sae. “People are gonna think we’re engaged now.” You laugh, amused how this situation turned out. “We’ll be soon anyway.” he says nonchalantly before walking away towards the bathroom and you take a moment to register his words. He already locked the door when you were fully able to comprehend his words. Unfortunately, you can’t help the blush that creeps up onto your face and spreads faster than a wildfire.
In which the paparazzi caught you and Sae shopping in a jewelry boutique (inspired by mbappe and ester lol)
Itoshi Sae x fem reader
warning! mildy? r-rated; Sae gets cockblocked by the worst news possible; Itoshi Sae is whipped your honor
Word count: 2.7k it’s not that long i promise
Your relationship with Sae had never been open to the public, much less discussed - just private. Everyone knew he had a girlfriend, but no one knew who you were. No one knew it was you. You were a complete mystery. Until today, that is.
When rumours started swirling a year ago that he had a girlfriend - mind you his fanbase was already deranged as it was, he immediately confirmed the rumours without hesitation - though indirectly. You weren't sure whether that was bold or reckless. Then again, Sae was hardly hyperaware of his fanbase, much less paid attention to it.
You remembered that interview that went viral overnight. A reporter had the audacity to ask Sae about the rumours right after his match. You remembered Sae taking a pause, his eyebrows scrunching slightly to convey his confusion, before his expression shifed to annoyance.
He answered with that ever so monotone voice of his, 'Ah? So what if I have? I fail to see how this is any of your businesses' - irritation flickering in his eyes. That was all he said before walking out of the pitch, seeing as the interview was no longer about football. He didn't want to entertain gossip.
Any further attempt to ask about his dating life was completely shut down. Sometimes he would say, 'Next question' - or he would simply walk out with pure indifference.
After that, the media learned to stop asking.
His patience was a luxury. He scared the reporters that way. His reputation had long been built on his character, seemingly the same both on and off the pitch. Cold. Sharp-tongued. Intimidating.
The rumours escalated when a photo was leaked a few months ago - a picture of you and Sae taking a stroll at the beach with your hands intertwined. It was dark in the evening, your backs turned against the camera, so neither of your faces were visible. For Sae on the other hand, no one could mistake his silhouette - his strong physique and his reddish-brown hair standing out despite the dark background.
The fans absolutely went into a frenzy. The comments were utterly bipolar. Some people were crying, angry or boldly delusional. If you weren't Sae Itoshi's girlfriend, you would've laughed at their stupidity. You mostly couldn't fathom how some of them directed their anger at a faceless girl they didn't even know.
A bead of sweat dropped as you imagined yourself getting jumped by his fans. You shivered.
Sae ultimately valued protecting your privacy over his own, always keeping your dates subtle. He was protective in that way. So when a paparazzi finally caught your face, clear as day in the camera - everything went straight down to the gutter.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈
30 hours before present time
You had been lounging on the couch, legs up, hugging a pillow on your chest, and lazily scrolling on your phone, looking for new things to buy.
Your thumb went to a stop when something caught your eye. It was a dainty, diamond pendant necklace. It was absolutely lovely. Very simple yet elegant.
You chuckled to yourself like a maniac, knowing this would hurt your bank account. But you simply must have it.
"You want that one?" a deep voice spoke from behind your shoulder, pulling you out of your own world. You looked up and saw Sae behind the couch, bending down slightly to see your screen.
He had just come back from the gym, hair slightly mussed, with white t-shirt perfectly hugging his muscles, the sleeves seemingly tight over his biceps, grey sweat-shorts, and his gym bag slung over his shoulder.
Perfect timing. You faced him with much excitement, your eyes twinkling expressively.
"Sae, what do you think about this one? Isn’t this lovely?" you raised your arm a bit so he could see your screen better.
He looked at it with indifference. "Hm, it's fine"
You gave him an unimpressed look. "Are you saying it's fine because I like it, or you saying it's fine because you think it's ugly and you just want to agree with me?"
"I like everything you like"
"Then I don't want it" you turned your back against him dramatically, unimpressed.
Sae wanted to deadpan at your antics, though there was an amused look on his face. He leaned down to kiss your cheek. "Are you upset? What did I say?" he murmured.
"I want you to be honest" you pouted, your head turning away from him.
Two seconds passed by.
"You make it look better." That was just that, short and sharp. It took a second before his words registered in your brain. You knew fully well what Sae meant - the necklace wasn’t anything special, but you, yourself make it look special.
His words hit harder than they should have, and your breath caught a little as your cheeks warmed up. "And yes, I like it. I think it would suit you." He added.
You slowly lifted your gaze at him. Well... if he put it that way then...
"Okay then! I'll go visit the shop and see it for myself", you said, your voice much lighter now, clearly excited.
You hopped off the couch to go get ready.
"Where are you going?"
"I'm gonna get dressed"
"I'll come with you. Wait."
You turned towards him and blinked. You gave him a confused look, an eyebrow slighty raising. "It’s broad daylight. People will see us.”
Your boyfriend stayed indifferent.
"Hm." He pulled out his phone. "I'll call the shop. They can reserve the place for us."
You stared. "Sae, is that really necessary? It would just bother them" you said. "It's fine, I can go alone"
But Sae was already tapping on his phone. "It's Cartier right."
You immediately grabbed his arm, stopping him. "Really, it's okay. I won't be long"
"I'll ask them to open after their closing time," he said simply. "There won't be people around then."
Your lips parted. Huh? Is that even possible?
Before you could even protest, he was already lifting his phone to his ear.
"W-wait"
"Yes, hello" Sae spoke calmly into the receiver.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈
The morning after, 1 hour before present time
Both your legs rested on the sofa, locking Sae in between. You were straddling him, sitting on his lap comfortably.
The brand new necklace resting on your skin, and Sae’s hand holding the pendant, inspecting it.
“I could’ve payed for this myself you know.”
He looked at you dead in the eyes with disbelief, as if you just insulted him in the face.
Like hell he would let you pay for yourself. Who were you kidding? He would spend more money on you than himself.
“It’s like you’re calling me poor.” Your boyfriend lifted an eyebrow.
You let out a chuckle. He looked so offended.
“Alright, I’m sorry” You cupped his face, giving him a light kiss on the lips.
”Sorry?” Your boyfriend stared flatly at you, clearly expecting more.
You rolled your eyes at his pettiness, a smile grazing your lips.
So you showered him with rapid kisses all over his face, twice on his cheeks, his forehead, his nose and finally a long peck on his lips.
“Am I forgiven now?” You smiled prettily at him.
“Hm, not quite.”
Then Sae cupped your neck and pulled you to meet his lips.
He kissed you slowly. His kisses were soft and gentle, trying to show how precious you were. You couldn’t help but smile as you reciprocate the kiss with the same motion.
He sucked your bottom lip, and your lips automatically parted, gaining him access to slip his tongue in. Pretty soon his kisses gradually got deeper, his hunger taking over - his tongue wrestling your own.
He was thirsty. He couldn't get enough of you.
Your head drew back from his intensity, lips still locking. So you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders to steady yourself. You thrusted your hip forward, pressing on him as if it was reflex - pressing on his hardened groin.
He groaned on the contact, fuck. He wouldn’t let you get away with that.
His hands travelled downwards to cup your bottom, giving them a squeeze. That's right, he had always had a fetish with your bottom cheeks. And you would be damned if it didn’t lit a fire within you.
You smirked in the kiss and pulled away, "Well then do something about it."
Instantly, Sae went rigid. You saw his jaw clenched so tightly. He knew well what you were insinuating.
You looked directly into his eyes, a sly look on your face as you brushed your fingers on his chest, then slowly going down to rest your warm hand on his bulge.
You leaned into his ear carefully, "please", your lips brushing his ear.
A beat.
He did not need you telling twice after that.
Before you could even react, you were instantly thrown down on the sofa, and you let a gasp in shock.
Sae took advantage of your parted lips to plunge his tongue in - wanting to bruise your lips, with a hunger so strong you’d think he hadn't been fed for a long time.
Your hands traveled under his shirt, feeling his muscular core.
Sae's warm hand caressed your exposed thigh, sending a shiver down your spine. His touch burned.
His mouth parted from yours then started trailing down kisses to your neck, giving you a moment to breathe - barely.
His hand creeped inside your shirt and found its way to your breast. He lifted your shirt with his other hand, just enough to expose your breasts. Then Sae bended down to suck.
He nibbled on your right nipple, his warm, wet tongue making it more sensitive. His other hand massaging your other breast. You shut your eyes tightly at the sensation, lips parting at how good it felt. An embarrassing sound escaped your lips - you were practically mewling.
He made his way up again to meet your lips once more.
His hips thrusted forward, and you gasped at the pressure, feeling his hardened bulge between your legs.
You wanted to ignite his hunger even further… so you gripped on his maroon hair tight - and started moaning his name into his mouth.
Your ploy seemed to work as Sae kissed you even harder, devouring your lips, making you breathe heavily through the nose.
He thrusted and pressed even harder on you, making your legs grow weak.
Sae slowly descended his hand on your stomach, then lower - until he reached between your thighs.
You sucked your breath, anticipating, your legs tightening around Sae.
Then as lightning struck down earth, a sudden, consistent buzz froze you both.
Sure enough, the buzzing stopped. He leaned down his head and resumed kissing you again fervently, his fingers slowly lifting down your underwear.
His lips descended down from your neck, giving you wet kisses in between your breast, down to your lower stomach.
Lower - lower. You could practically feel how you were soaking wet - and he would finally get a sweet taste of that.
Buzz Buzz
You and Sae froze again.
What in the fuck could they possibly want right now, Sae thought, letting out a groan in annoyance.
This time you halted, and cupped his face to bring him up to your level. Somehow you had this gut feeling that something didn't sit right. "What if it's important?" you gave a worried look at Sae.
Sae gave an irritated huff, resting his forehead on yours.
The buzzing stopped once more, then resumed again after a beat.
“Sae, take it.”
"I swear if it's Shidou, I'll cut his throat out and feed it to the dogs" He spoke with a gruff, his expression darkening.
Sae reluctantly got off you and reached for his phone on the coffee table. He immediately swiped, not even bothering to read who the caller is.
"You better not waste my ti-"
"Sae-chan!" A frantic voice spoke. It's Girolan. "Thank goodness."
Sae paused at Girolan's tone, he was clearly panicking but Sae couldn’t give two shits at the moment.
What the fuck? Sae pinched the bridge of his nose, not understanding any bull for shit.
His jaw tightened, his fist clenching tightly as If he was going to punch someone. He swore he was going to pull all his hair out for ruining his good goddamn morning. I don't deserve this shit. He'd never felt this much rage before since Bunny Iglesias.
Sae took a deep breath, loosing his temper, clenching and unclenching his fists. He wanted to hit something.
Yet he gathered all composure he could muster before speaking, "Girolan, I don't understand what you're saying, speak slowly." He managed to speak calmy, contrary to his outrage.
A beat.
"Someone caught you both last night. They leaked the pictures just a few minutes ago."
…
Shit.
All the anger died down in a split of a second, now replaced with shock.
Sae turned to look at you with wide eyes, strikingly opposite of his usual aloof expression.
What? What? What happened. Dread creeping in.
Sae parted his lips, trying to find the right words, anger slowly seeping in again.
His eyes didn't leave you, and it took a few seconds before he spoke again to the receiver. "Call back the agency. Find out who's responsible." He spoke slowly, his voice deep and cold, seemingly collected.
Inside, he was boiling. How could he be so careless. In all 2 years of being with you, he swore to himself to protect you - to not let you get taken advantage of malicious cameras or harassed by the media. And he just created an opportunity for that, now that the world knows what you look like.
He gritted his teeth in anger. He would personally take care of the person responsible for those pictures - murder in his mind.
He ran his fingers to his hair tightly. "And shut all those pictures down." He added darkly.
You looked up at him in disbelief. Pictures?
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈
Present time
You sat on the sofa as you scroll through your laptop, seeing both your face and Sae’s plastered in your big screen. On top of the article, written in big, bold letters - Sae Itoshi Spotted With His Girlfriend Last Night.
One picture showed Sae standing behind you, clasping the necklace around your neck. Another picture showed you both looking at a display, with Sae’s hand resting on your waist. The third was you speaking to an associate of the shop, with the pendant gleaming softly against your skin.
The pictures were carefully zoomed in, taken from outside the windows. It felt too intrusive, enough to make your stomach drop.
You rubbed the space between your eyebrows, dreading the worst as you scroll down to the comments.
saeforlife: No way this is true, I'm so heartbroken
urtea_towel_:The girls are all crying rn
its.daniel24: Idk why this is relevant to football'
defnotmadz: Somebody stole my nonchalant man
user6677: This must be AI
lizzyhopeee: Bro she's a baddie omg
tu_tuvelo!!: They look good together what’s the problem
cacababy111: Gold-digger lol
Excuse me? That last comment caught you off-guard. And you let out a scoff of anger. How dare–
In the corner of your eyes you saw your phone continuously blinking with endless notifications. You took a peek at your screen.
Oh my goodness, they found your Insta already. You hastily threw away your phone on the couch, horrified.
You heard footsteps and you looked up to Sae approaching, tapping the end button on his phone. He had been busy talking with PR team.
Sae was fuming. One of his managers in his PR team suggested he post an official statement, but Sae was no goddamn popstar. He wasn’t obligated to spoon feed the public. He couldn’t care less of what others think of him but he’d draw the line the moment your privacy is crossed. He wouldn’t stand for paparazzi following you, harassing your privacy, especially when you’re alone.
The thought of your private, intimate moments being plastered all over the internet made his jaw tighten.
Sae stopped in front of you and bent down on on his knee to meet you, his eyes apologetic. “I’m sorry, amor”
You gave him a sympathetic smile “There’s nothing to be sorry about, Sae."
“No, it’s all my fault. I should’ve been more cautious.”
“Sae, we both knew this would happen at some point. It’s not your fault.” It was true. It was bound to happen.
He averted his gaze from you, lips pursing.
But you cupped his face and forced him to look at you. You kissed him softly on the lips.
“Do you know what this means?” You asked with a slight smirk, attempting to lift the mood. “We can go to disney world now.”
Sae let out an unbelieving huff. Of all damn things..
You lifted an eyebrow and forced your face to keep straight. “I’m serious. We should wear matching shirts and those cute headbands.”
Sae put two of his fingers on your forehead and pushed your head back lightly
“Oww” you exclaimed dramatically.
In all honesty, Sae felt relieved too. It was over now, no more walking on eggshells on the street. No more hiding. He could now freely show his girl off to the world, walk hand in hand outside in broad daylight without pretending to be subtle, and take you out on dates in public places you’d always wished for.
For the first time the world saw you. And he would damn show to the world that he was only yours.
-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈ ┈┈
End notes: lmao shidou as the prime suspect sae thought of first. Also, gang did yall see mbappe posted ester on his ig like 3 or 4 days ago?? And the lyrics on his song choice was like ‘she has blonde hair my baby is the prettiest..’ I was gagged, that def inspired me to write.
The elevator ride to the penthouse was silent, save for the faint hum of machinery. Rin watched the floor numbers climb on the digital display, his reflection caught in the polished chrome of the doors. He looked the same as he always did, sharp, severe, a bit too tense, but the air in his lungs felt thin.
Sae had reached out. That was the anomaly. A text message, devoid of any pleasantries, providing an address and a time. “I’m in Tokyo for the week. Come by at seven.”
It wasn't an olive branch; it was a summons. But for Rin, it was the closest thing to a conversation they’d had that didn't involve a pitch and a ball. He told himself he was going there to gauge the gap between them, to see if the prodigy of Spain had grown soft in his old age. He didn't admit, even to the silence of the elevator, that he’d actually checked the time every ten minutes since six o'clock.
The doors chimed and slid open.
The hallway was quiet, carpeted in a deep charcoal that muffled his footsteps. When he reached the door, he didn’t knock. He wasn't a guest; he was blood. He pressed his thumb to the scanner, Sae must have registered his prints beforehand, and the lock clicked with a heavy, expensive sound.
The apartment was exactly what he expected of his brother. Minimalist, expensive, and cold. High ceilings, floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the glittering sprawl of the Minato skyline, and furniture that looked more like sculptures than things meant for sitting.
“You’re late,” Sae’s voice drifted from the kitchen area. He was leaning against the marble island, a glass of water in his hand. He looked casual in a way that felt like a provocation, black cashmere sweater, hair slightly mussed, the usual bored expression fixed firmly in place.
“Traffic was lukewarm,” Rin replied, shutting the door behind him. He kicked off his shoes, lining them up with habitual precision. “And you’re the one who chose a place in the middle of the city.”
Sae didn't offer a rebuttal. He just tilted his head toward the living room. “Sit down. I’m finishing some calls.”
Rin rolled his eyes, crossing the expanse of the hardwood floor. He was ready to find a spot on the rigid designer sofa and wait in a brooding silence until Sae decided he was worthy of attention.
He stopped short at the edge of the rug.
There was someone on the couch.
A girl was curled up at the far end of the long sectional, a thick knit blanket draped over her legs and a tablet propped up against her knees. She didn't look up immediately, her thumb scrolling through what looked like a digital manuscript or a textbook. Beside her sat a mug that smelled faintly of cinnamon and expensive roast.
Rin stood frozen. The air in the room shifted. He felt a surge of immediate, reflexive hostility, the kind he reserved for anything that disrupted his focus.
“Sae,” Rin said, his voice dropping an octave, laced with a sharp, questioning edge.
Sae walked over from the kitchen, not even bothering to look up from his phone. “What?”
Rin gestured vaguely, his hand rigid. “Who is this?”
The girl looked up then. She didn't jump, didn't stammer, and didn't look even remotely intimidated by the six-foot-plus professional athlete standing in the middle of the room with a murderous scowl. Instead, she offered a small, easy smile.
“Oh, you’re here,” she said. Her voice was calm, settling into the room like it belonged there. “We were wondering if the rain would hold you up.”
Rin’s eyes snapped back to Sae, who was now standing next to the couch. Without a word, Sae reached down and moved the girl’s feet so he could sit on the edge of the cushion. It was a casual, tactile gesture, one that spoke of a thousand shared afternoons.
“My girlfriend,” Sae said. The words were flat, delivered with the same weight he might use to describe the weather or a tactical formation. “Don't stand there like a statue. You’re blocking the view.”
Rin felt like he’d been hit with a blindside tackle. 'Girlfriend.' The word didn't fit in his vocabulary when it came to Sae. Sae was a machine. Sae was a midfielder who saw the world in lines of efficiency and cold logic. Sae didn't have 'people'. He had subordinates, rivals, and a brother he delighted in tormenting.
“Since when do you have a girlfriend?” Rin demanded, though he kept his voice controlled. He wouldn't give Sae the satisfaction of seeing him lose his cool in front of a stranger.
“Since before I came back to Japan this time,” Sae said vaguely, waving a hand.
The girl set her tablet down on the coffee table. “I’m glad to finally meet you, Rin. Sae’s mentioned you’re a bit of a handful, but he didn't mention you were so tall.” She stood up, wrapping the blanket tighter around her shoulders for a moment before letting it drop onto the sofa. She moved through the space with an effortless familiarity, heading toward the kitchen. “Are you hungry? I was going to order something, but Sae insisted on making something light since you’re in training.”
Rin didn't answer. He couldn't. He watched her walk into the kitchen and reach for a specific cupboard, the one where the high-protein pasta was kept. She didn't ask where things were. She didn't fumble with the complicated European stovetop. She moved around Sae’s space as if she’d designed it herself.
“Sit, Rin,” Sae repeated, his voice taking on that familiar, impatient bite. “You’re giving off a pathetic aura. It’s annoying.”
Rin sat. He chose the armchair furthest from the couch, his back straight, his eyes tracking every movement in the kitchen.
The next hour was one of the most surreal experiences of Rin’s life.
He had come here expecting a psychological war, a battle of wills where they would trade barbs about their respective seasons in Europe and the state of the national team. Instead, he was watching a domestic tableau that felt like a glitch in the matrix.
The girl, Rin still hadn't quite processed her name, his brain filtering it out in his initial shock,bwas hummed a low tune as she moved between the island and the fridge.
“Sae, the salt is low,” she called out.
“Bottom drawer, behind the espresso pods,” Sae replied without looking up from his tablet.
“Found it. Do you want the usual roast for later, or are you trying to actually sleep tonight?”
“The usual. We have a film to watch.”
She made a soft sound of disapproval. “You’re going to give yourself an ulcer. Rin, does he always work this hard when he’s home, or is he just showing off for you?”
Rin stiffened as the question was directed at him. He looked at her, searching for any sign of mockery, any hint of the sycophantic behavior people usually displayed around the Itoshi brothers. He found none. Her eyes were bright, curious, and genuinely relaxed.
“He’s always been obsessed,” Rin said stiffly. “It’s the only thing he’s good for.”
She laughed. It wasn't a loud sound, just a soft, melodic huff of amusement. “Fair enough. At least he’s consistent.”
She brought over a tray of water and a bowl of sliced fruit, setting it on the coffee table between them. As she leaned over, Sae reached out, almost subconsciously, and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.
Rin’s grip tightened on the armrest of his chair.
He’d seen Sae be many things. He’d seen him be cruel, arrogant, brilliant, and dismissive. But he had never seen him be 'gentle'. The way Sae’s fingers lingered for a fraction of a second against her temple, the way his sharp, teal eyes softened just a fraction when she looked at him, it was nauseating. It was fascinating.
“You’re staring, Rin,” Sae said, his gaze shifting to his brother. “It’s creepy.”
“I’m not staring,” Rin snapped. “I’m wondering why you brought a civilian into this.”
“She’s not a ‘civilian,’” Sae said, his voice cooling. “She’s the only person in this country who doesn't talk to me about football the second I wake up. Which makes her significantly more valuable than you.”
The girl poked Sae in the ribs with the back of her hand. “Be nice. He’s your brother.”
“He’s a brat,” Sae countered, but he didn't pull away from her touch. In fact, he leaned slightly into her space.
As the evening progressed, the evidence of their longevity only piled up. She knew that Sae hated the sound of the ice maker, so she’d turned it off before they sat down. She knew exactly how much honey he liked in his tea when he had a slight cough, which Rin realized now, hearing Sae’s faint rasp, that Sae actually had. She even knew where Sae kept the spare charging cables for the specific model of tablet Rin used.
“Here,” she said, handing Rin a cable. “Your battery light is red. It’ll die before you leave.”
Rin took it, his fingers brushing hers. She felt warm. Real. “Thanks.”
“No problem.” She smiled at him again, and for a second, Rin saw what Sae saw. There was a groundedness to her. She wasn't a fan, and she wasn't an athlete. She was a tether.
By nine o'clock, the girl stood up and stretched, her oversized sweater slipping off one shoulder. “I’m going to head into the office for a bit to finish that project. You two should talk. Try not to break anything.”
She leaned down, and to Rin’s horror, she pressed a quick, casual kiss to the corner of Sae’s mouth.
“Don't stay up too late,” she murmured.
“I won't,” Sae said.
She waved at Rin. “It was nice meeting you, Rin. Don't let him bully you too much.”
Rin just nodded, paralyzed. He waited until he heard the door to the far room, the one Sae used as a home office, click shut.
The silence that followed was heavy. Sae picked up his water, taking a slow sip, looking entirely too unbothered.
“What the hell was that?” Rin hissed, leaning forward.
Sae raised an eyebrow. “A conversation. Food. You’ve seen humans interact before, haven't you? Or did Blue Lock turn you into a complete animal?”
“Don't mess with me,” Rin said, his voice vibrating with suppressed indignation. “Who is she? Really?”
“I told you. My girlfriend.”
“How long?” Rin demanded. “How long has she been living here? How long has she been... in your life?”
Sae set the glass down. He looked at the closed office door for a moment, his expression unreadable, before looking back at Rin. “About a year. Give or take.”
Rin felt a physical jolt of offense. “A year?”
“Roughly.”
“We played in the Champions League qualifiers six months ago,” Rin said, his voice rising despite himself. “We were in the same city for three days. You didn't say a word. You didn't even hint that you weren't alone.”
“Why would I?” Sae asked, his voice maddeningly calm. “It wasn't relevant to the match.”
“It’s relevant to 'everything'!” Rin stood up, pacing the small space between the chair and the sofa. “You’ve spent the last three years telling me that I’m too emotional, that I’m too tied to people, that my football is lukewarm because I can't stand alone. And all this time, you’ve had... 'that'? You’ve been playing the part of the solitary genius while someone else is making your coffee and knowing your habits?”
Sae watched him, his gaze cool and analytical. He didn't get angry. He didn't get defensive. He just waited for Rin to stop vibrating with rage.
“You’re missing the point, as usual,” Sae said quietly. “She isn't a crutch, Rin. She’s a choice.”
“A choice you kept from me.”
“I keep a lot of things from you. You’re obsessed with me. If I’d told you a year ago, you would have spent every match trying to figure out how she changed my center of gravity or how she affected my vision. You would have made it about football.” Sae stood up, walking toward the window. The lights of Tokyo reflected in his teal eyes. “She has nothing to do with the pitch. That’s why she’s there.”
Rin stopped pacing. The anger was still there, simmering, but it was being overtaken by a strange, hollow realization. He had spent his entire life studying Sae, trying to dismantle him, trying to understand the clockwork of his brother’s mind so he could eventually break it.
And yet, he hadn't known this. He hadn't known that Sae liked cinnamon in his kitchen, or that he allowed someone to see him when he was tired, or that he was capable of holding a relationship together for an entire year without destroying it with his arrogance.
“Does she know?” Rin asked suddenly.
“Know what?”
“What you’re really like. How much of a bastard you are.”
Sae turned back, a faint, almost imperceptible smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. “She knows better than you do, Rin. She’s seen me lose. She’s seen me when I can’t sleep because my ankle is acting up. She doesn't care about the New Generation XI. She thinks the lower eyelashes are a genetic quirk, not a brand.”
Rin looked at the office door again. He felt a weird, prickly sensation in his chest. It wasn't the hatred he was used to. It was something else, a realization that the brother he was chasing wasn't just a goalpost to be reached. He was a person with a life that Rin wasn't the center of.
“She’s too good for you,” Rin muttered, crossing his arms over his chest.
Sae actually let out a short, dry chuckle. It was the most human sound Rin had heard from him in years.
“I know,” Sae said. “Now sit down. If you’re going to be offended, do it while we look at these set-piece VODs. You’re still telegraphing your inside curves.”
Rin grumbled, but he sat back down. The tension in the room had changed. It wasn't gone, it would never be gone between them, but the sharp, jagged edges had been buffed down by the presence of the girl in the other room.
A few minutes later, the office door opened slightly, and she poked her head out.
“Sae, I can't find the blue folder. Did you move it?”
Sae didn't even look up from the screen he was holding. “Second shelf, under the anatomy textbook.”
“Got it! Thanks, love!”
The door shut again.
Rin looked at Sae, who was already highlighting a defensive lapse on the video. Sae looked calm. He looked settled.
For the first time in a decade, Rin didn't feel like he had to break his brother to understand him; he just had to accept that there were parts of Sae Itoshi that didn't belong to football, and they certainly didn't belong to Rin.
“Your positioning here is trash,” Sae said, pointing at the screen.
“Shut up,” Rin replied, but his voice lacked its usual venom. He leaned in, peering at the screen, as the smell of coffee began to waft from the kitchen once more.
The world was still cold, and the rivalry was still there, but in the quiet of the apartment, the ice had begun, very slowly, to melt.
Rin realized then that for all his talk of destroying Sae, he was glad there was someone there to pick up the pieces when the game was over.
Imagine Part 2: After what happened in the storage room, Zanka started avoiding you. Not very successfully, if you were being honest.
He left the cafeteria whenever you walked in. During training, he suddenly found urgent things to do on the opposite side of the field. And when you sat down beside him in the common room one afternoon, Zanka silently got to his feet and moved over to sit next to Rudo instead.
Rudo looked at him, then at you.
“Did you two have a fight?”
“No,” you said.
“Yes,” Zanka answered at the exact same time.
You slowly turned toward him.
“We had a fight?”
“We do now.”
Rudo frowned, clearly trying to figure out what was going on, but Zanka was already on his feet and heading out of the room.
You watched him leave.
“Wow. He's so sensitive.”
“What did you do to him?” Riyo asked suspiciously.
“Nothing much.” You shrugged.
“That usually means you did something terrible.”
You only smiled.
Unfortunately for Zanka, Riyo wasn’t the only one who noticed his strange behavior.
Enjin noticed too. Your brother had an almost supernatural ability to notice anything involving you, especially when it also involved a man acting suspiciously.
Which was how Zanka ended up finding Enjin waiting for him near the training grounds that evening.
Enjin was leaning against the wall, casually rolling a cigarette between his fingers. His expression was easygoing, his smile relaxed.
Zanka still tensed the moment he saw him.
“Zanka,” Enjin drawled. “Got a minute?”
“No.”
Enjin grinned.
“You do now.”
Zanka stopped.
You were watching from behind a half-open door, barely managing to keep quiet.
“You’ve been acting weird lately,” Enjin said.
“I always act like this.”
“Nah. Usually you’re weird in a different way.”
Zanka frowned.
“Did you actually want something?”
“Yeah. I wanted to know why you keep running away from my sister.”
Behind the door, you pressed a hand over your mouth.
Zanka went still.
“I’m not running away.”
“Sure.”
“I’m keeping a reasonable distance.”
“From her?”
“Yes.”
Enjin nodded thoughtfully.
“So you like her.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t deny it either.”
“I’m denying it now.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Zanka let out a long breath and looked away. He already seemed to be considering every possible way to escape the conversation alive.
Enjin studied him for a few seconds, then laughed and clapped a hand against his shoulder.
“Relax. I’m not going to kill you.”
Zanka gave him a wary look.
“Really?”
“Of course.”
“That sounded like the first half of a sentence.”
“It was.”
Zanka closed his eyes.
Enjin leaned a little closer, still smiling pleasantly.
“If you hurt her, I’ll let her deal with you first.”
“And after that?”
“Then I’ll deal with you.”
“That sounds more believable.”
“Good. Glad we understand each other.”
Enjin gave his shoulder another friendly pat and walked away. Zanka remained standing in the middle of the corridor, staring after him.
You carefully leaned out from behind the door.
“Feel better?”
He spun around.
“Were you listening?”
You gave him your most innocent smile, lightly biting your lip.
“I happened to overhear.”
“You were standing behind the door.”
“I happened to be standing behind the door.”
Zanka slowly walked toward you. Judging by his expression, he was genuinely angry this time.
You backed away, though the pleased smile on your face gave you away immediately.
“Why are you avoiding me?” you asked.
“Because things like this keep happening whenever I’m around you.”
“What things?”
“I get locked in storage rooms. Your brother interrogates me. And you never stop laughing at me.”
“That’s because I like you.”
Zanka paused.
“And because you’re funny,” you added.
“I’m not funny.”
“You are when you’re nervous.”
Your back met the wall. Zanka stopped in front of you and planted one hand beside your head, blocking your way.
For once, you were the one looking up at him.
“Well,” you said. “Someone’s gotten brave.”
“This is what you wanted.”
“Maybe.”
“Then don’t complain.”
He leaned closer. This time, he made the first move. Your smile faltered just a little.
“Zanka?”
“What?”
“You’re not thinking about Enjin again, are you?”
“No.”
“Are you sure?”
“Right now, I’m thinking about how to make you stay quiet for one minute.”
You opened your mouth, already prepared with another teasing remark.
You never got to say it.
Zanka kissed you. It was sudden and almost angry, as if he was less interested in kissing you than he was in finally shutting you up, and proving to himself that he could actually do it. His lips barely touched yours before he pulled away.
He probably regretted it immediately. You didn’t give him the chance to retreat. Your fingers slid into his hair, curling gently around the back of his head as you pulled him in again. The second kiss was nothing like the first. It wasn’t rushed or awkward. It was warm, deep, and far more confident than either of you had expected.
Zanka exhaled softly against your lips. He froze for only a moment before kissing you back, forgetting all about Enjin and every reason he had spent the past few days trying to stay away from you.
His hands settled around your waist, no longer cautious. His fingers tightened in the fabric of your clothes as he drew you closer, and you willingly pressed against him, feeling the last of the tension between you disappear.
When you finally pulled apart, neither of you moved very far. Zanka stayed close, breathing heavily, while you rested your forehead against his. You smiled when you noticed just how red his face had become. Even redder than it had been in the storage room.
“What?” he asked.
“Nothing.” You laughed softly.
“Just say it.”
Your smile widened.
“I was just thinking you should listen to my advice more often.”
“What advice?”
“I told you that next time, you didn’t have to move your hands.”
Zanka stared at you.
“As you can see,” you continued, “it was excellent advice.”
He closed his eyes and let out a defeated sigh. Then a familiar voice came from around the corner.
“Hey. What are you two doing over there?”
Zanka jumped away from you as if he had been electrocuted. You burst out laughing and leaned into the corridor.
“Nothing, Enjin!”
Your brother appeared around the corner and narrowed his eyes.
“Why does Zanka look like that?”
“It’s hot,” you replied calmly.
Zanka slowly turned to look at you. Enjin raised an eyebrow.
“Outside?”
“Very hot,” Zanka said, his face completely blank.
You nearly laughed again.
Enjin looked between the two of you for several long seconds before a knowing grin spread across his face.
“Right. Just try not to get locked in anywhere again, okay?”
Zanka went pale. Even you froze, suddenly fascinated by the loose strand of hair near your face. Enjin walked away, whistling cheerfully.
Silence settled over the corridor.
“He knew,” Zanka muttered.
“Looks like it.”
“The entire time.”
“Probably.”
Zanka covered his face with one hand.
You gave his shoulder a sympathetic pat.
“Don’t worry. He said he wasn’t going to kill you.”
“That does not make me feel better.”
You rose onto your toes and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek.
“Get used to it.”
Zanka lowered his hand and looked at you with exhausted resignation. But when you reached for his hand this time, he didn’t pull away. Instead, he laced his fingers through yours.
Imagine: You were Enjin’s beloved little sister. The one he had always protected and spoiled, the one he was ready to deal with anyone over without asking too many questions.
And somehow, out of all the Cleaners, Zanka was the one who had caught your eye.
The only problem was that Zanka seemed to fear and respect your brother far more than he was willing to admit. So whenever you hinted at your feelings, he responded with tense silence, carefully kept his distance, and pretended not to notice your interest at all.
It did not upset you. Quite the opposite, it amused you endlessly. That was exactly why you loved creating situations that made Zanka especially uncomfortable.
Like accidentally getting locked inside the headquarters storage room with him.
It was unusually quiet in there today. Zanka pulled the door handle for the third time, then threw his shoulder against it and let out an irritated breath.
“Locked.”
You were sitting on one of the crates, idly swinging one leg.
“What a tragedy.”
He slowly turned his head toward you.
“Does this not bother you at all?”
“Should it?”
“We’re locked in a storage room.”
“I noticed.”
Zanka frowned even harder and grabbed the handle again, as though it might suddenly be moved by his persistence and open on its own.
You struggled to hide your smile.
The situation did look strange, to be fair. You had come here to collect supplies for the next mission. Zanka had entered first, with you following right behind him, and barely a minute later, the door had somehow ended up locked.
From the inside. Exactly how that had happened was something you preferred not to explain. Zanka preferred not to ask. Probably because he was already beginning to suspect the answer.
“You didn’t do anything, did you?” he finally asked.
You pressed a hand to your chest.
“How could you possibly think that of me?”
“Very easily.”
“That hurts.”
“You’re smiling.”
“Is that forbidden?”
He gave you a long, irritated look. That was exactly why you enjoyed teasing him so much.
Zanka could keep a perfectly composed expression during training, on missions, and even when Rudo pushed him to the edge of his patience. But the moment you stepped a little too close, a barely noticeable tension appeared in him.
Not because he disliked you. At least, you hoped not. The real reason was much funnier.
Enjin. Your dear older brother.
Zanka had once said, with complete seriousness, that getting involved with Enjin’s younger sister would be “practically voluntary suicide and an exceptional display of disrespect.”
Ever since then, you had considered it your duty to regularly remind him of that fear. Meanwhile, Zanka was studying the small window near the ceiling.
“If we move the crates…”
You let out a heavy sigh.
“Zanka.”
“What?”
“Relax for one minute.”
“I am relaxed.”
You looked at him. Then at the door. Then back at him.
“Of course you are.”
He was clearly about to argue, but you had already stepped closer.
“Sit down.”
“Why?”
“Just sit.”
“No.”
You placed your hands on his shoulders.
Zanka tensed immediately.
“Hey.”
“Sit.”
“I can do it myself…”
You pressed down lightly, forcing him onto the old wooden chair by the wall.
Zanka looked up at you with obvious displeasure.
“Happy?”
“Not yet.”
Before he could ask what that was supposed to mean, you calmly settled yourself on his lap. Zanka froze. He seemed to stop breathing altogether.
You rested one hand comfortably on his shoulder and playfully twirled a lock of his hair around your finger.
“Much better.”
Trying to preserve what remained of his composure, he let out a heavy breath and said seriously,
“Get up.”
“Why?” you asked, batting your eyelashes innocently.
“Because.”
“Very convincing, Zanka.”
“Get up.”
“Zanka.”
“What?”
You leaned a little closer, your warm breath brushing against his skin.
“Are you thinking about Enjin again?”
His expression told you everything.
You laughed.
“God, you really are afraid of him.”
“I’m not afraid of him.”
“Of course.”
“I simply respect him as my mentor.”
“How devoted.”
“Your brother once told everyone that if anyone at headquarters tried to make a move on you, he would personally…”
“Enjin says a lot of things,” you said, waving a dismissive hand.
“He was completely serious when he said it.”
“He was being dramatic. You know he’s hardly a saint himself.”
“That is exactly what worries me.”
You barely managed to hold back another laugh.
Zanka carefully placed his hands on your waist, clearly intending to move you somewhere farther away, but you immediately raised an eyebrow.
“What?” he asked irritably.
“Nothing.”
“Just say it.”
“You’re holding my waist all by yourself now.”
Zanka pulled his hands away at once. You burst out laughing.
“You’re impossible,” he muttered.
“And you like that about me.”
You touched his cheek with the tip of your finger.
“No,” Zanka answered evenly.
You pushed out your lower lip in an offended pout.
“Not even a little?”
“Not even a little.”
You leaned closer still, until your lips were barely brushing.
“Then why are you blushing?”
“It’s stuffy in here.”
“Zanka, it’s colder in here than it is in the hallway.”
“Stop while you still can.”
You smiled and finally rose from his lap. He immediately let out a breath of relief. Then you walked over to the door and calmly turned the small latch beside the handle.
Click.
The door swung open.
Silence fell behind you. A very dangerous kind of silence. You slowly turned around.
Zanka was still sitting on the chair, staring at you as though he had just witnessed the greatest betrayal of his life.
“You…”
“What?”
“You locked the door?”
“Maybe.”
“We could have left this entire time?”
You gave him an innocent shrug.
“At least you got to rest.”
“I’m going to kill you.”
“I’ll tell Enjin.”
Zanka covered his face with one hand. Smiling in satisfaction, you stepped out into the hallway.
A second later, the top of your head appeared in the doorway again.
“By the way, Zanka?”
“What now?”
“Next time, you don’t have to move your hands.”
Then you disappeared before he had the chance to answer. For several seconds, Zanka remained completely still.
🚯 first started writing this when i was watching pursuit of jade lol, so yes, this is heavily inspired from that one scene jwbskwhsksnw
“c…consummate the marriage?”
zanka himself couldn't hide the twitch of his eye the moment your father and his father (who is now your father-in-law, obviously), told you of such a thing.
“indeed,” said the head of the nijiku family. “the marriage will only be valid if you complete the act, no?” he turned to your father.
your father chuckled, eyeing you nervously. he certainly didn't mention this to you, though the look he gave you seemed as if to say, “this should've been obvious.”
well, fuck. you could just lie your way through it, couldn't you?
you looked to your side and watched the even breathing of zanka nijiku, his eyes closed and his hands lay calmly on his lap.
although the same demeanor cannot be said for what's going on inside his head at the moment.
as you’ve always been the obedient, never-questioning daughter of the l/n household, you have no choice but to agree to your father's request regarding an arranged marriage with the second son of the nijiku family. but… this?! even zanka nijiku didn't seem to have been properly briefed regarding this matter.
now, however, the second son isn't exactly bad… except for his short temper (or so, as you've heard and assumed), and his always furrowed brows.
it was the second night of your marriage, and you refused to sleep on the same bed as him. out of respect, or maybe you just didn't want to make it awkward. after all, the two of you barely knew each other until the proposal of arranging your marriage came up.
the nijiku family holds prominent power over the land, so you decided to let the ‘spoiled’ (as you'd assume) second son of the nijiku be the one to sleep in the comfortable bed, while you sleep somewhere else. anywhere else… just not beside him.
still… lying in your arms on the short table isn't exactly comfortable—it numbs your arms. and the cold wasn't exactly doing you any favor.
hearing the cloth of your nightwear rustle against the floor where you sat, zanka's eyes blinked open. he tilted his head a little to take a look at how you were doing.
yesterday, you slept beside him with a few inches of distance and a long pillow separating the two of you. you got up early in the morning and barely talked to him during the day. and now, you lie uncomfortably on the short table, cold and restless.
“c'mere,” zanka's voice snapped your eyes wide open, making you jolt in place.
“...it's okay.”
“y'wanna catch a cold?”
“the cold doesn't scare m— achoo!”
stupid. you mentally slapped yourself. how dare your body betray you at a time like this.
your head faced the other side of the room, but you heard zanka prop himself up to sit on the bed.
“you wouldn't be the only one who ain't gettin’ sleep tonight if you don't c'mere,” zanka said.
you looked at him in confusion, and he simply pointed towards the door, and you saw two figures lingering outside.
those two…! you're sure it was your closest confidant, and the other must be zanka's. well, whatever. if you're not getting sleep tonight, they aren't either.
but your body aches—from the festivities held yesterday, and today's errands and… tonight's supposedly sleeping position on the floor—, zanka's offer seems really good right now. besides, you're married anyway, so what's the point in saying no?
no. get a grip. do not succumb to—
“if you don't wanna sleep beside me, i'll be the one to go.” zanka made a motion that he'd leave the bed, so you quickly got up and waved your hands in panic.
“no, no, that can't be.”
zanka raised an eyebrow at you, crossing his arms.
you fiddled with your clothes, awkward and fidgety. “i mean, i can't have a nijiku sleeping on the floor, or anywhere other than a comfortable bed, so…”
“why not? i've slept in a well before.” zanka's sudden confession perked your interest. two fingers clutched the bridge between his brows, he was visibly tired and sleepy. “for three days, in fact.”
“three? surely, you jest.” you sat properly, crossing your arms. “why did you even…?”
“it's… it ain't a story that's easy to tell but,” zanka raised a finger in front of his face, “if you c'mere i'll tell ya.”
this guy..!
you chewed on the inside of your mouth with furrowed brows, and spitefully (just an act) made your way towards the bed. zanka scooted to the side and patted the space beside him. you plopped down on that spot and hugged your knees towards your chest.
the two of you sat there in silence, both staring at nothing. the silence wasn't awkward, but it wasn't exactly comforting either.
you want to know more about zanka— no, you have to, because you will be spending the rest of your life stuck with him forever. maybe you could break it off in the future, when both of you are older and have a chance to control your life more than what you are capable of now. but right now, you have to make do with what's in your life.
zanka had offered to tell his story, but you could feel his hesitation. he opened his mouth to start, only to be stopped by a noisy rustle coming from the door, making both your heads snap in that direction.
“let's put on an act for now,” zanka offered with an annoyed grumble, and gestured for you to move closer—even moving the candle on the bedside table to cast the shadows better. “we don't have to do anythin’ so don't worry.”
you moved close to him, facing him, eyes anywhere but him, and you could feel his hot breath on your neck.
“...lie down,” zanka ordered.
you finally met his eyes, and you were stunned by his big dark blue eyes—big and full like a pool of water, slowly luring and drowning you in. “what?”
“lie down,” zanka repeated, louder this time.
you did as he ordered, and he quickly towered over you, his blond bangs hanging close to your face.
you moved your head to the side, still unwilling to look at him.
“this means nothin’, get it?” zanka said in a low whisper, almost as if to convince himself and not you.
you looked at him and saw his honest eyes.
on a closer look, this nijiku boy doesn't look bad. in fact, he is pretty. even prettier than an average boy.
you shifted uncomfortably under him, unused to the position you were in.
you could feel zanka's arms shake under the weight of his body. you remembered how you saw him training the whole day earlier—dedicated and focused. he must have been tired.
“let me be on top,” you offered. “so you can rest.”
zanka nodded, letting you flip him over so he'd be the one lying in bed.
you stared at him, and now he's the one getting flustered all over.
with an attempt to brush off his shyness, zanka suggests, “you can lean on me… this might take long.”
so you did as he said, you tucked your arms on his chest and laid your chin on top of them like a cat. but this position restricts you to only be able to look at him, unless you flip your head to the side.
a chuckle leaves your mouth unconsciously, forming a smile on your lips right after.
“what? the zanka nijiku being this shy?” you teased him, lying on his chest comfortably.
“...shut up.”
“tell me about it,” you asked in a low whisper.
“about what?”
“why you stayed in the well.”
zanka pursed his lips, and you spent seconds in silence before he started telling the story behind it. he explained it briefly and tried to leave out parts of the story he was too ashamed to tell. although one thing that struck you is why no one even bothered to look for him and convince him to go home for those three days.
“it's alright,” you softly muttered. “i'll find you if that happens again.” though you hoped it wouldn't happen to him again.
your eyes did not betray the honest tone of your voice. as zanka examines your face, his gaze landed on your lips. the ceremony held required the two of you to kiss, it was quick, but it didn't turn out unpleasant. he tried to remember the soft sensation of your lips against him, and he wanted to feel it again—not just the physical feeling, but also the hammering of his heart when you kissed. or perhaps it is something that only happened because it was his first kiss?
you finally caught on to zanka's intent, and you didn't know why, but you don't feel anything against the idea of kissing him again. what will it feel like for the second time? what will it feel like now that you know something about the man you'll be kissing, and not just his name, his address, social status, and family?
curiosity can really drive one crazy. how you wish he'd just lean in and kiss you so you can both call it a night.
zanka's throat bobbed in nervousness, debating whether to ask for permission first or just let the thought be lost in the night.
when he finally gathered the courage to open his mouth, a harsh wind came and blew the candle out. the two figures outside rustled out with a giggle, apparently believing the act you two have put up.
having realized this, zanka cleared his throat, and you came off, settling beside him.
“spend the night in bed,” zanka finally said in the silence of the dark. “we can put up a barrier between us like last night.”
you nodded, although you were sure he wasn't able to see it anyway. “good night, zanka.”
he only hummed in response.
tonight, you saw zanka in a new light. maybe marrying him wasn't so bad, after all.
🚯 tysm anon!! this was in my reqs for... 6 months now oops haha sorry :'(( i havent been very good with accomplishing reqs after february so yaaa and lowk why do i feel like this was another shitpost of mine and just an excuse to write something to poj LOL ANYWAY
SYNOPSIS: When Sae left for Spain, you regretted not ruining the friendship by telling him how you really feel. Having spent the past years trying to rid your lingering feelings for Sae, you’re hit with a whiplash as you meet him again at your middle school reunion and old feelings start to resurface. However you’re proven that it’s not that easy to get over your childhood love when Sae is adamant on making you his.
wordcount: 7.7k (trust me) | content & warnings: possibly ooc!sae, sae as kind of aloof, hard time reading social cues & blunt (i firmly believe in sae w undiagnosed asd but it’s not explicitly mentioned), jealous!sae, they’re childhood friends, reader and sae in a closet, sae has a hard time communicating, rin cameo, fluff, hurt/comfort (they clash), sae is yearning (in his own way — him and his emotional constipated ass), miscommunication, kabedon, attempt at kissing ; oneshot
CURRENT ORDER FOR TEA99: Felicity’s special blend which consists of a purple cup filled with Black Tea, with a splash of almond milk. It’s served on a platter along with a slice of Pandan Honeycomb cake
AUTHORS NOTE: taking my own special and calling it a day & this is what a one week cruise without wifi does to u
Nothing lasts forever, because time is an all returning tide that softly kisses the shore before it washes away everything, leaving no trace behind. Memories will be woven into the form of photos and trinkets until they're nothing more than remains of the past. When time flies, so does everything else with it, they’re carried into the sky and fly away from your grasp — quite literally so.
In your dictionary the definition for missing someone who was still alive would be Sae Itoshi — your former neighbour — the boy from next door.
It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that Sae saw you in every stage of your early teenage years. From when you were eleven and got those hideous braces to fix your teeth (that you still regret to this day because why would you have chosen that design out of all the designs there were?) that made you lisp for the first two months you got them.
Or when you were twelve and had gotten your first bad mark because your teacher didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that it was your bench neighbour that copied the answers from your sheet. After that you wailed for the entirety of the day while Sae just sat there and nodded along while listening to you as you decided about how you’d quit going to school after this. (You still went the next day.)
Not to forget the time when you were thirteen and you finally tried to make a move on Sae. You had it all planned out: the when, the how and the where. Rin had liked horror movies from a young age on and he’d always ask Sae to watch them with him, so when you asked if you could watch a horror movie with them that’s when you seized your chance. The three of you sat in the living room and shared a blanket on the sofa. Your plan was simple: anxiously move around, wait for a jumpscare, yelp and hold Sae’s hand — it’s basically a foolproof plan.
It wasn’t hard to guess that the climax of the movie was soon, the anticipation built up and you felt your heart hammering against your chest along with it. “It’s time now” you thought to yourself and crept your hand under the blanket “Where is his hand?” the thought plagued you as your hand frantically roamed around. “What are you doing?” Sae spoke up quietly, accentuating every word and you jumped in your seat. Luckily Rin didn’t bat an eye and continued to focus on the movie. “Just searching for the remote.” you laughed sheepishly, embarrassed he caught you. “What? You’re scared?” He teased and quirked his eyebrow. “Pff, who me? No, never-“
Hurriedly you look back to the television and the universe just had to bite you in the ass after that. It was exactly in the moment when your eyes met the
screen that a jumpscare had appeared. “THE FUCK?!” You screamed and amidst the moment you accidentally pushed Sae off the sofa making him tumble down onto the floor. Safe to say that your plan was a failure.
However the same goes for you — you’ve also seen Sae grow up over the years. It was around the time the two of you entered first grade that you had to teach Sae how to be more polite. Sae had always been quite blunt and straight to the point — you’ve gotten used to it, but for others, especially adults it was a shock seeing a six year old telling their teacher that they have morning breath and asking them if they’ve never heard of brushing their teeth.
Many disliked Sae, be that classmates, teammates or other neighbouring children, with very few exceptions who did like him, still, that never seemed to faze him even in the slightest. In fact his confidence made you like him even more. Looking back Sae probably found you to be a stick in the mud and only tolerated you because his mother had forced him to, but you like to think that he eventually had started to enjoy having you around.
Because why else would Sae have met you outside in the dead of the night when you couldn’t sleep and stayed with you until you calmed down? He hung out with you after training, talked to you about his dreams of aiming to be the best striker in the world and never made any rude comment towards you like he did with others. (You might be a bit delusional for that one, but for Sae, being polite was quite literally a miracle, so you’ll take it.)
That was until Sae became the boy you had to say goodbye to. What would you do if your childhood best friend, also crush, left for god knows how long? There were still unresolved feelings which lingered between you and Sae — at least from your side.
‘Is it better to speak or to die?’ When you were 14 you practically lived off that quote and made it your entire personality, thinking you’re the most sophisticated person to walk this earth. When you first heard it online somewhere you just stole it and ran with it, so there wasn’t much originality to it, but it did motivate you to do some things — whether those were good or bad are debatable.
Because confessing to Sae shortly before he leaves maybe wasn’t the smartest decision you’ve made.
When his parents went to the washing rooms with Rin you decided to muster up the courage. “I hope you have lots of fun in Spain.” you told him before hugging him shortly. Sae wasn’t a big fan of physical contact, he’d always stiffen like a stone statue, however this would be the last time you see him, so can he blame you? After letting him go, Sae fixed his clothes, brushing over his wool sweater to iron it out. “Yeah I will. I’ll become the best striker in the world soon enough.” Based on the way his eyes shone, the folds of skin around them crinkled and how his usually aloof expression took on a smile, you could tell that he meant it sincerely — it’s always been his dream after all.
“Yeah, definitely.” you assured him, fully believing in him. You didn’t know it yet, but the next time you’d see Sae neither of you would be the same. But maybe a small part of you did know and that’s why you decided to confess your feelings back then. “You know Sae.” It started off awkwardly, you still remember it as if it just happened. You vividly remember the way his head turned and how a small “hm?” escaped his lips. On the inside you felt yourself hesitating, thinking it’s not too late to back out now. Still, even back then, you knew that if not now, Sae would slither through the gaps of your fingers like flowing sand. “I actually used to have this big crush on you.” Too ashamed by your own words, you turned your head away from Sae and laughed nervously. “But don’t worry! Not anymore!” You quickly added as you continued to laugh to cover up your embarrassed state. Not wanting to stay in this situation any longer you ushered Sae to go away, motioning with your hands for him to leave now. “Have a safe travel. Text me when you land!” From your peripheral vision you saw his parents returning and stepped back from Sae. “[Name.]” Sae called out your name and you tilted your head to the side, and shot him a bashful look. He opened his mouth and croaked out some incoherent sounds as if the words that lied on the tip of his tongue got mixed up. His next attempt to talk was interrupted both by his parents and an announcement.
“Flight 1211 will now depart. The last passengers please board the plane. Thank you.”
Rin ran up to Sae and looked at him with big eyes. “Big bro, your flight! You need to go now!” The younger Itoshi brother said as he was beaming with a smile so sweet that the cherry blossoms which grow in your shared hometown, Kamakura, don’t even compare to. (You haven’t seen Rin smile like that for a while.)
That was Sae’s cue to leave. After this moment you won’t see him again for a while and maybe that made it worse because you didn’t know how long that while would be. No, you weren't over Sae Itoshi, in fact his farewell made your heart ache even more for him.
As soon as that realisation hit you, it felt like there was an invisible border that separated the two of you — one which both of you knew better than to overstep.
It was an all too familiar line. It’s the same line Sae used to draw in the sand with the wooden stick he got from the icicle; he’d always buy one when you went to the beach. The line was supposed to represent a border that marked your territories to establish where one’s territory ended and where the others started. It was a silent mutual agreement between the two of you.
In response to Rin, Sae hummed in acknowledgment and you’re still not sure to this day, but it looked like he swallowed the words he wanted to say to you in the end. “Yeah, you’re right.” He nodded at Rin and his parents before casting his gaze over to you. “See you.” Wistful cerulean eyes met yours and even though his face didn’t say it, his eyes told you enough. You think that that was the saddest you have ever seen Sae. He shot you one last smile, one that doesn't quite reach his eyes as he waved his hand towards you before going through the check in.
——
There’s someone talking in your ear, but you can’t hear it over the loud thudding of the music and people talking. Moreover your mind is completely elsewhere. Why’d that memory suddenly pop up in your mind, and out of all times, now?
“I guess what I’m trying to say is if you wanna go out for drinks some time?” The question snaps you out of your memories, transporting you back to the present. You shake your head and blink rapidly, to the point where you can feel your eyes tearing up. The drink in your hand almost spills from how tightly you’re holding the plastic cup. “Wait, I’m so sorry. What did you say?” Apologetically you turn to the person who was talking to you for almost the entirety of the whole reunion. Not to lie, but you didn’t have any clue who this guy was. From what you’ve gathered his name is Shin, his classroom was next to yours and apparently he was also on the middle school football team with Sae. Not like you really paid attention to anyone other than Sae, so you never really noticed any of his teammates until you were approached this evening. However he does seem like a nice person. Well spoken, sweet, quite polite and doesn’t look bad either.
He — Shin as you learned — profusely coughs in his hand before swallowing as if to prepare for what he’s about to say. “I meant to ask if you have any interest in going ou—“. Before you can fully listen to what he has to say, you get interrupted. “Guys! Don’t just stand around. Come over here and play!” The host — your former class rep — comes over to the two of you and invites you to join her and the others who are sitting in the living room, circling around what seems to be some sort of bottle.
“Sure, why not.” Upon your agreement she happily grabs your hand and leads you to the living room, Shin following the two of you. You look back over your shoulder and whisper to Shin. “What is it you wanted to say?” In response to your question he just chuckles, shakes his head and mouths something you don't quite get, leaving you confused.
Not wanting to pry any further you follow your former class rep as she leads you over to her friends who are all sitting on one side of the room. They all have matching hair tinsels—how cute—you think to yourself as you observe the shiny gold strands in your class reps hair. Shin on the other hand gets pulled away by a group of guys—his friends you presume. One of them slings an arm over Shin’s shoulder and whispers something into his ears. Whatever it is, it makes Shin laugh and he shakes his head as he says something to his friend. Amused by whatever his friend said he playfully swats said friend’s arm away before his eyes find yours and he waves his hand. You look around to see if he means you and he confirms by nodding enthusiastically. Not quite sure how to respond, you give him a small smile, unaware of a pair of cerulean eyes watching you from across the room.
There’s a lot more people gathering in the living room now and more familiar faces start to pop up.
Sitting on the sofa is the girl who won the running race at every sports festival, the same group of people who performed at the school festival are still hanging out together and—oh—the captain of the baseball club—wait—THAT captain of the baseball club? Not trusting your eyes you ask the girl next to you and she confirms it for you. Your eyes widen in disbelief as you see him walking into the living room. Back in middle school your friend was head over heels for him, even going as far as gifting him chocolates on Valentine’s Day and confessing to him after graduation. If she’d be here she would totally freak out.
When he stops to check his phone you don’t even let a second pass. There’s no way you're gonna let this chance slip away—you have to take a picture for your friend. Hastily you pat your jeans to find your phone. Now your only mission was to somehow find a way to sneakily take a picture without looking like a complete stalker that’s been counting down all the days until middle school reunion to take a picture of him from afar.
Luckily for you, he’s still looking down at his phone. Carefully you zoom into his face, getting a better look at him was essential. But the more you look at him the more you realise something—wow—your friend does have a type, now that you think back of her ex-boyfriends.
All of a sudden there's something blocking your camera; someone’s standing in front of your phone. Expecting to see maybe Shin or one of your old classmates, you look up, however you weren’t prepared for the person standing in front of you.
It’s sudden, terrifying and at the same time embarrassing, how your heart rate immediately increases. Your heart races in your chest. You feel it jumping against your ribcage urging to run away—as if it’ll explode if it doesn’t escape from the insides of your body. Like there is something on the line.
Except there is something. “Everyone’s gawking.” The blunt words linger in the air and you’re reminded of who’s talking to you. Too stunned to say anything you stay quiet, amidst it all still managing to put your phone down your lap. “Youre like the sixth person who took a photo of me since I came here.” He eyes the tiny gap next to you and on instinct you move. You understand it immediately—it’s something that’s been ingrained in your brain—something you always did, as you inch away to make space for him.
In response to your gesture, he merely nods as a way of saying thanks, before sitting himself next to you on the floor. Your mind still can’t comprehend it, this must be some sort of illusion. “Sae?” It’s barely a whisper, but it’s the only thing you seem to be able to say at this moment, your mind still short circuiting over him being here and sitting next to you.
He doesn’t say anything, maybe because he doesn’t feel the need to, Sae’s never been a talkative person after all. Still, there are so many questions popping up in your head, so many that you don’t even know what to ask first.
Should you be worried? That might not be the most appropriate reaction, maybe you should be happy? Still, that doesn't seem right—perhaps relieved would do? The more you think about what you should feed the more you start to doubt yourself. Maybe Sae didn’t want you to react at all? All of your emotions are starting to stack together like a tower of plates, which is just waiting for the right moment to tumble down to end up shattering into a mess of shards.
Your train of thought doesn’t have the time to drive to any other thoughts due to your class rep interrupting to explain the mechanics of the game. There’s not much to it; it’s quite simple. After spinning the bottle, the two lucky people who sit where the ends of the bottle point at, have to go into an enclosed storage room for ten minutes and have time to kiss. If they don’t, whether they decide against it out of personal reasons or something else, the outcome is the same. Both of them are forced to down some kind of alcohol mixture with something you don’t even want to know.
This reunion might as well just be a typical week for middle school with all the things that are happening. People are already talking and whispering amongst themselves as the game proceeds and the further it goes, the more it reminds you of middle school; it’s like you're on a field trip again, sharing a room with your closest friends and playing truth or dare past midnight.
There are so many unlikely pairs which you would’ve never thought of ever seeing together—hell—you’re certain that they also haven’t ever talked to each other in middle school. Then there were others with unrequited crushes or exes who ended on bad terms. As for the others who weren’t so lucky, they had to endure the punishment of drinking a mixture of alcohol, some fruit juices, soft drinks and sometimes even condiments.
It’s all fun and games until it’s your turn. The bottle with the end where the bottle cap is located, lands on you, you look over to who sits at the opposite end of the bottle and to your surprise you see Shin who’s already grinning at you. It wouldn’t take an expert to determine that he looks delighted and quite happy, that claim of yours is practically being supported by how his friends cheer on him. Shin helps himself up, stands up straight and looks at you with this expectant glimmer that makes you feel uneasy and your gut churn together. Everything seems to still in that moment, the chatter, the music, the people. It’s futile—the way you tell yourself to stand up and walk over to Shin, simply because that’s what everyone expects you to do. However you can’t and there’s a simple reason for that, unlike the person you love—Sae.
Sae is difficult to read—he’s always been a closed off person. Everything about him is neatly tucked away, hidden behind a curtain of thorns that sting when you try to squeeze yourself past them. Still, when you do manage to fight them off, you’ll find that beneath all of these sharp thorns there’s a delicate rose that waits for you in all its purity—its delicate petals start to bloom when you get closer to it. Take a step closer to Sae and you take a step into his heart, you’ll find out that there's much more to him than his seemingly apathetic demeanour.
As ridiculous as it sounds, you have to refuse because of a puppy love that you haven’t been able to get over. In the past four years you have gone on dates with other people and they were great, so it wasn’t like that your whole love life revolves around Sae. Also, there’s no way you could ever discredit those people's efforts to get to know you, in fact they tried their best, but it was always you who ran away before it could develop into something more serious. You were the one who stopped responding to messages after a while, pretended not to know them when you walked past them on the streets or turned down invitations when you knew that they’d be there.
No matter how much you try to deny it, there’s a part inside of you that's unmistakably still in love with Sae Itoshi. There are fragments of Sae’s personality that only have ever been exposed to you, and yes, maybe it’s selfish to want to keep those to yourself—in fact you don’t want to risk them being shown to someone else, because that would mean that you’re no longer special to him.
For thinking like this Sae would surely call you stupid, because he isn’t some sort of exclusive celebrity (except he kind of is) and just because others learn more about him that doesn’t equal you being of any lesser worth. Still, he is your Sae and you know what kind of person he is.
He was always aiming to be the best there is; any medal other than gold was something Sae refused to accept. That’s why he left for Spain. To become better. Simultaneously you tried to do the same—becoming a better version of yourself that you can be proud of, pursuing dreams and different relationships. You succeeded in doing so—at least that's what you thought. Seeing that Sae is once again entering your life, you think that you haven’t changed at all—you’re the same 14 year old chasing after one of his rare smiles and affirmations. Just by being here, Sae has once again turned your whole world upside down.
A love you develop for someone at the age of 14 can’t last, it’s just a fleeting crush that exists because you don’t know the person—is something you’d probably think if it weren’t for Sae.
You’re almost certain that even if Sae hadn’t come this evening you still would’ve decided against kissing Shin by telling him some on the spot made up reason. But now that Sae is here, everything inside you tells you that you most definitely can’t, simply because of Sae’s presence. Is it pathetic to have lingering feelings for your childhood best friend? Maybe.
Once more you’re drowning in a pool of memories. Only when someone calls out your name, are you able to pay attention. Everyone’s staring at you, their gazes heavy as they observe your every move. The way your fingers tremble under the dim purple lights, how your eyes flicker around the crowd and they might as well hear your heartbeat from how loud it’s hammering.
This shouldn’t be so difficult—if you do it now you’re done with it, just be honest and there’ll be no hard feelings. Stand up, spend time with Shin in the room, tell him you can’t do it and face the humility of drinking one of these mystery mixtures. Just as you were about to stand up and do as you planned, a hand grabs your wrist and pulls you upwards—Sae.
His hand feels cold to the touch and his grip is harshly pressing against your forearm that you’re sure it’ll leave marks, but you don’t fight it; you indulge in it, granting him the chance of continuing.
The people in the living room start gathering around you, watching as Sae drags you into the enclosed storage room. He pushes the door open and throws you inside, the wall cushioning you, as you press your palms against it to prevent a hard fall.
“Ouch.” you remark drily, sarcasm dripping off your tongue. It’s only then when you notice how annoyed Sae looks that this closet is tiny; it’s no more than a small storage for brooms and some canned goods. “Still not a fan of small spaces?” You attempt to begin a conversation with him, but Sae doesn’t react. On the contrary his face is blank, his lips press into a thin line and his eyes search for something to fixate on so he doesn’t lose his composure. You recognise that expression, he makes the same face when he tries to puzzle pieces of information together or overwrites them, because they differed from the information he had previously gathered.
Sae had always said what's on his mind—each and every single thought—meaning that utmost honesty was to be nothing to be surprised about. So, seeing that he’s at a loss for words, is rare. You don’t say anything, knowing that if you disturb him he’ll lose his train of thought.
There’s barely any space between the two of you and you start feeling warm. Everything is too much too process. Your clothes are sticking too tightly on your skin, your hair is plastered all over your face and your lips feel incredibly dry as you brush over them.
“I thought you liked me.” Sae says all of a sudden, his words startling you. If you weren’t overstimulated enough from the sensory overload, you were now as well emotionally overwhelmed. “I,” you stutter, the words are stuck in your throat. “I’m sorry?” You croak out quietly. Sae simply blinks, his bottom lashes fluttering as he repeats his words. “No, no,” you laugh, eyes roaming around the enclosed space. “I understood you the first time. I’m just,” you inhale deeply, because this isn’t what you expected; this wasn’t the outcome of what you had in mind. “I’m just surprised.” You confess to him, before quickly switching the topics. “I mean, yeah, I like you. We’re childhood friends after all.”
Sae’s eyebrows furrow together, suggesting that you misread his intentions. “I didn’t mean it like that.” The worst part of it all is that you know what he’s referring to, and you’re sure that’s why Sae looks so frustrated right now. Embarrassed that he caught on to you makes your eyes meet the ground. You’ve always had a bad habit of denying things you were embarrassed of which oftentimes led to miscommunications between the two of you. As it seems, things haven’t really changed a lot. “If it’s about the confession you don’t have to worry.” You thought it’d be easy to say these words out loud, but you can feel how your cheeks are burning up, probably reddening by the second. “I already told you that I don’t have a crush on you anymore.” Sae lets out an exasperated sigh and you can practically feel the annoyance it carries. His reaction makes you look up, afraid you might have offended him. Somehow you say the first things that comes to mind. “Seriously, that was sooo long ago. I don’t like you like that anymore.”
You look at him, expecting him to sigh again or to maybe just stay quiet, because he’s tired of explaining, however you aren’t prepared for his next words. “But I do.” Three simple words leave you more breathless than any “I love you.” It’s an objection that makes your heart flutter and your mind spin in a way that only Sae could manage to do. Still, this doesn’t feel right nor real. “Sorry?” You express confusion, because although your heart is overjoyed and jumping from happiness, your mind still can’t fathom it. “Yeah.” Sae confirms it as if it’s the easiest thing in the world; he’s been waiting to say this.
The longer you wait for something the more you want it. Humans are sociable beings that crave for bits of attention, because mutual understanding and love creates a bond that cannot be recreated alone. For one cannot survive a life alone that is meant to be shared by many. Meaning that even someone as reserved as Sae, like anyone else, has the need for human interaction, in his case, with you as the center.
“You like me.” Each word is heavily accentuated to make Sae hear himself and how unbelievable he sounds. But all Sae does is nod; he just shakes his head in approval. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say.” The admission is so quiet that you don’t know if Sae even heard you. Whether he doesn’t acknowledge it on purpose or simply ignores your word is unknown to you, but it doesn't matter to him, if Sae has a goal in mind he’s keen on accomplishing it. “Do you like me?” And perhaps after all your doubt and uncertainty, you’re no better than Sae—it is you who fulfills his need. “Yeah.” You manage to say. The words lift a burden off your shoulders, because even after all this time, you can’t deny your feelings for him.
You thought that if you kept this a secret for a little longer the feelings would’ve gone away. That they would disappear. But every time you saw Sae on the billboards, social media or walked by his house which was quite literally every day, the feelings started to resurface. Each time stronger.
Alas, Sae is a person full of surprises and you recall the time when you were around ten years old. Sae and you have been talking about something for a while and somewhere during that conversation the word “difficult” fell from his mouth. All you remember after that was that your mother had to console you as she patted you on your back for the whole afternoon. It was only after Sae left that his mother explained the incident to you.
She saw you running off, looking upset and went up to Sae to ask him what had happened. Sae told her what the two of you talked about and how your expression changed into something he couldn’t describe, when he called you difficult. His mother then explained to you that Sae didn’t mean difficult in the sense that he was annoyed at you, but because he couldn’t figure you out. He tried solving you, but failed—that’s why he said that. She had explained that usually Sae doesn’t bother finding people out if he doesn’t understand them, but he genuinely wanted to know you. And then, when you ran off, Sae didn’t run or call after you not because he wasn’t worried, but because he never saw you sad and he was exposed to a new situation with no instruction on how to act.
Sae has a hard time figuring out other people’s feelings, moreover he has a more difficult time understanding his own. He doesn’t know why he feels a certain way and somehow when he tries to express it, people often get the wrong idea. With the little pieces he has about someone or the concept of something, Sae tries to piece together a picture of what is happening, but that doesn’t always work out in his favor.
Even if he doesn’t admit it, you know that Sae thinks of himself as a composed person who can maintain a clear head in every situation. So that’s why when he asks you: “If that’s true, would you also have kissed another person then?” You’re taken aback, because this wasn’t something Sae, out of all people, were to ask. Maybe as a way to confirm his thesis about you liking him, but there was something else in Sae’s voice—something that could only pinpoint to possessiveness. He means Shin, you’re sure of it. Granted, Sae is a rational person and you know that he’s never been much of a jealous or envious person, but there were times when he did become this kind of territorial person. His feelings don’t come from a place of insecurity or anxiety, but because he has the need to maintain what is his. You wouldn’t call it a pride thing, more like a safety measure for himself.
“I don’t know.” You whisper after a while—a lie. Back in middle school when Sae asked how you were doing (as a form of courtesy because his mother told him that small talk is a way of showing politeness) you’d always lie to him, going on about how you were doing fine and so on. Sae never really questioned it, because in his mind lying is useless, why’s there the need to lie; isn’t being truthful more useful? It’s only when one day you asked him if he really believes you’re always fine that Sae started to get an insight into your head. For what reason did you need to lie for? Sae never got it, he wasn’t mad at you because of it, he genuinely just didn’t understand what your purpose behind it was.
That’s why Sae knew that you were lying, he didn’t know what for, but he knew that you were being untruthful. “Don’t give me that crap.” Sae spits, the words coming out more aggressive than he had planned. In fact, Sae always says things in a monotone manner. As long as his message gets across, he doesn’t see the need to put any unnecessary emotion into his words. “Why are you so mad? I should be the one who’s mad.” Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion, because you didn’t expect Sae’s former habits to act up—Sae knew you didn’t like his way of being rude and honest. Perhaps that’s why you couldn't repress your own bad habits. Whenever Sae started being like this you’d become agitated and sensible about everything.
“I’m not mad.” Sae tries to explain, slowly catching on to the fact once again, he conveyed his thoughts wrongly. “Well, too bad because I am.” You sigh and run your fingers through your hair. “You left for four years. After the first few months I didn’t hear anything from you! It’s like you disappeared. Do you know how worried I was?” Your voice quivers as you recall the memories. Sae listens attentively as you continue. “Then one day when I did get a message from you it was some shitty birthday message.” You express frustratedly. “Also how about replying to my messages instead of leaving me on read?” You’re aware that something like that, something so little, is such nonsense, but to you it felt like any ounce of attention Sae gave you was enough to provide you with a sense of fulfilment for a while.
Whilst you were complaining you wiggled around with your hands in the storage room, your fingers managing to hit the shelf behind you and causing a number of cans to fall out. You don’t react fast enough to dodge one of the cans bumping your shoulder, it’s only then, when Sae pulls you by the waist and away from the shelf that you realize what position you’re in—Sae has you pinned to the wall. His one arm folded over your head and his other touching the wall behind you. From your position you can survey his face. You could almost count the row of his bottom lashes, the way his bangs start becoming loose and how nicely they frame his face and how his teal eyes gaze downwards at your lips, almost like on instinct, you do the same.
Realizing what you’re doing and the position you’re in, you start becoming flustered and end up pushing Sae away. Sae doesn’t complain, in fact it almost seems like he lets you do as you please. You turn away from Sae, your back now facing his head. “Then, if you had been paired with someone else, would you have kissed them?” In actuality you don’t want to hear the answer, because it doesn’t matter what it is. You press your teeth into your bottom lip, the contact sharp as you feel the canines gnawing at the flesh. “No.” His response is immediate, like he doesn’t even need to think about it. The way he says it—the calmness behind it, it makes you wonder if you’re perhaps overreacting. Sae is no liar, far from it, still you don’t know if you have it in you to fully forgive Sae yet. “And now I’m supposed to trust your word after you don’t trust me?” You turn around and snap at him. “It’s up to you to decide.” He merely shrugs and you’re quiet after that. Because after all these and now when given the chance to let go of him Sae comes back like nothing happened and confesses to you as if it is the easiest thing in the entire world.
“When I left for Spain you confessed to me.” Hearing that Sae brings up that memory again you can’t help but groan. “We’ve been over that matter,” you sigh in annoyance. “Yes, yes I confessed to you. Happy now?” You ask, the words laced in exhaustion. Nevertheless, Sae sure knows how to wake you up to the point where his mere words can stir something inside you. “I wanted to tell you that I liked you too and still did, but then my parents came.” He explains, his hands now stuffed in the pocket of his jeans as he looks at you. When you think back, there’s an image of Sae swallowing his words down that flashes in your mind. “Then why didn’t you say anything all these years?” You complain, wanting to know what has made him decide that keeping it to himself would be a good idea. “I thought you were over me, but I wanted to see for myself before accepting it.” He confesses and you’re stunned. “That’s one way to do it.” You scoff sarcastically, crossing your arms over your torso. “Couldn’t you have just texted me?” You say before your mouth forms a small o-shape. “Oh right, you never responded to me.” You remark and you look at him through half lidded eyes.
Sae combs his fingers through his hair before sighing. “You know I don’t talk a lot. I just didn't see any reason to.” He sighs before tilting his head to the side. “Was reading them not enough? It means I saw them.” You don’t want to blame Sae for things he cannot control, you know he doesn’t mean it with bad intent, but that doesn’t make his words hurt any less. “It makes me feel important. Like I’m still a part of your life.” You start off. “Everyone knows your name now and I just feel like I’ve just become a bystander of your life, like everybody else.” Sae’s following silence after your words makes you feel uneasy. Have you blamed him for something unreasonable and started projecting your own insecurity onto him?
“Is that how you felt?” He eventually speaks up and his eyes find yours. Over the years you’ve learned that Sae’s eyes express the most emotion, whether that be a little squint of his eyes when he’s confused, rolling his eyes when he’s irritated or how his eyes slightly widen when he sees something he likes. “Yeah, it’s dumb. I know, okay, but like,” you stop mid sentence not even sure what it is you want to say. Sae uses your silence to move closer to you, the remaining space between the two of you almost gone. “I’m gonna be honest I don’t understand why you feel like that.” His words make your heart drop to your stomach, you want to say something, but you’ve reached your limit. “Because you’ve always been more than just a bystander. I never saw you like that.” It’s funny to the point where it’s kind of pathetic, the way Sae makes you feel. “Just because I didn’t text you regularly, it doesn’t mean that I didn’t think about you on the regular.” You’re sure that your heart just skipped a beat, because that wasn’t what you anticipated for him to say. “What do you mean?”
Sae looks away, seemingly embarrassed. “I remember when I first came to Spain I’d often go to the beach.” He breathes in deeply before turning his gaze back to you, a small smile grazing his lips. “I thought about you there.” His confession makes you feel warm and fuzzy and you can’t help but let a smile of your own slip out. “Any time before a game I’d look at my stupid horoscope like you always did for me.” He huffs in something you’d describe as amusement. “It’s not stupid though.” You let out a cheerful laugh and Sae’s expression softens, his eyes resting as he sees your happy expression. “It is.” He scoffs, but you can sense the fondness beneath his words. “But I like it cause it reminded me of you.” He admits and at his words, you can’t help but smile. Sae wasn’t a person of many words, but all the words he did say, you know that they’re all sincere.
“I’m sorry I never told you.” He says and you can’t help but roll your eyes in amusement. “You have a lot more to do when you think I’m gonna forgive you that easily.” To your dismay, Sae might have taken this quite literally and he quirks his eyebrow in confusion. “Like what?” The more he looks at you the more you curse yourself for that stupid remark because why did you feel the need to say that? “Like uh,” you cough and start feeling your cheeks burning up as you try to think of something. “Let’s just discuss this somewhere else. You know, appropriate time and place.” You laugh awkwardly, but unfortunately Sae doesn’t seem to be fazed by your words. “We could kiss.” Sae says it so easily you think you misheard. “What?” You shriek, though Sae’s reaction makes you put your hands over your mouth in response to him twitching at your voice. You mouth a “sorry” after putting your hands down and Sae just shakes his head, the corners of his mouth crinkling.
He pulls out his phone and shows you the time—there’s one minute left. “Or are you eager to drink today?” You immediately shake your head, eyes widening at the mere thought of drinking some vodka, lemon soda mixed with tabasco sauce. It’s then when Sae eyes your mouth and looks upwards to your eyes that you realise what situation you’re in. 13 year old you would not believe you if you told them that Sae, out of all people, would be the first to initiate a kiss. You gulp and nod in response to his proposal and he reaches forward to softly cradle your face, looming over you, before closing his eyes and leaning in.
Not wanting to embarrass yourself you close your eyes and pout your lips together before leaning forward, you can feel Sae inching closer and closer, his warm breath ghosting over your lips. It’s clumsy, the way your noses bump against each other first, but the both of you try anyway. He gingerly presses his lips onto yours before, there’s barely any contact, because he’s only grazing your upper lip with his mouth but—
“AND TIME’S UP.” Your school comrades practically burst through the door with your class rep holding up her phone. On it is a timer set for 10 minutes that had already run out.
Ashamed that you had been caught you quickly push Sae away, making him fall into a tower of plastic buckets as you scramble away from him. Sae rubs his forehead and groans as you put your hand at the side of your head to shield you from the prying eyes that are looking at you.
It happens so quickly, but the door is being closed shut again, that you don’t even process it at first. Only when you hear a “Don’t mind us!” Come from the other side of the door can you relax and sigh in relief. You move closer to Sae to check up on him. “I’m sorry for that.” You giggle as you look at Sae's disheveled state. On the other hand Sae doesn’t look as amused as you do, but he lets out a fond sigh, that tells you more than enough.
Outside the chatter doesn't die down and you start hearing some:
“I told you guys that there was something between them ever since middle school. See, I told you the rumours weren't fake!”
“Didnt he always reject valentines gifts from girls? I honestly thought he was gay.”
“No way! I’ve actually had him as the anti-romantic type.”
Upon hearing everything that’s being said about the two of you, you can’t help but laugh. Sae snorts at your reaction, before smiling at you as he watches how you have to calm yourself down from laughing.
There are lots of things that Sae and you still have to work on. Many of them find their origin deeply rooted in your shared past, but if you can wait four years for Sae, the man you love, you’re also willing to spend the next four years and the years to come, to figure things out with Sae. All that matters is that you do it together.
BONUS:
Sae rings the doorbell once and the front door is opened almost immediately. “Sae..Itoshi?” Someone who Sae doesn’t recognise calls out his name (not like he really recognised anyone here), the guy's mouth is wide agape as he continues to stare at Sae. Not bothering to pay attention to him, Sae just walks past the guy and inside the home, before pulling off his shoes. “Itoshi, I didn’t expect to see you here.” What a loud voice, he thinks. One that rings a bell for him though and is oddly familiar. The girl walks up to him and bumps him on the arm. “Now whatcha doing here.” Sae just grunts, not in the mood to respond, instead he scans the room and his eyes almost immediately land on a figure—you—who’s standing at the kitchen counter. However you’re not alone, someone else who Sae reckons as familiar, stands close to you and is talking your ears off. The girl's gaze follows Sae’s before she turns to him and smirks. “Had a change of heart, huh?” She says teasingly, before she runs off. Her back faces Sae and all he sees is the golden plastic strands woven into her hair swaying from side to side as she runs up to you and the guy.
END NOTE: oh yeah i read blue lock like 2 years ago and larp the chapters off tiktok but my love for Sae never died okay… also justice for shin #plotdevice and shoutout to the class rep #bestwingwoman + also, if you wanna read my thoughts for the fic and things I had in mind that go deeper into the characters you can find them HERE
♫ fluff, suna rintaro x gn!reader, wc: ~700, request for @jamongcha
There seems to be a rumor going around among EJP Raijin that you and Suna Rintaro are dating.
This comes as news to you, because as far as you knew, Suna Rintaro was unfortunately still just your best friend, even after years and years of pining for him.
The closest you ever got to making out of the friend zone was the incident a few months ago where you both got drunk and he kissed you, but much to your chagrin and despair, he never so much as brought it up afterward. You were so angry that you didn't speak to him for days, leaving all of his Instagram reels spams on delivered and FaceTime requests rejected.
So where the hell did this notion start that you were dating Suna Rintaro?
“Where the hell did you hear that?” you splutter indignantly at Komori, who had just congratulated you both on finally getting together. And what the hell does he mean “finally,” you think angrily to yourself. It's like salt in the wound; he makes it sound as if you had been both pining cluelessly for each other for forever, which may be true in your case, but Suna had made it very clear the kiss from that night was a mistake that should be forgotten. It's as though the universe refused to let you forget the embarrassment and sting of it all, Komori's well intentioned message feeling like a mockery of your feelings instead.
Komori's eyebrows furrow in confusion and he exchanges glances with Washio, who seems just as lost as him.
“Do you mean you and Suna aren't…”
“Of course we're not,” you snap, frustration bubbling out of you. “Trust me if we were, I'd be screaming it from the rooftops by now.”
Komori's jaw drops and Washio laughs. “I think I understand now,” the latter wheezes after a moment.
“Understand what,” you scowl, and Washio laughs harder as a light dawns on Komori.
“Oh,” he says, grinning mischievously. You fight the urge to throw something at his head. “You might wanna ask Suna about that. After all, this is something we heard from him.”
It's your turn for your jaw to drop and Komori pats your shoulder sympathetically as he and Washio continue their way to the lockers. Their laughter rings mockingly through the now empty hallway as you open and close your mouth in shock.
“You look like a fish,” a familiar voice snorts and you jump, face flushing as your eyes meet with the culprit of all your troubles.
“You!” you exclaim, pointing your finger accusingly. “What's all this about us dating, huh, Sunarin?”
He tilts his head, raising an eyebrow. “What about it?”
“I- well- but it’s not true!” you shriek, arm shaking with rage.
“What do you mean?” his head recoils, a rare moment of true confusion as your words catch him completely off guard. “Haven't we been dating since that night I kissed you?”
Silence.
You're flabbergasted. The same Suna Rintaro who disappeared from your apartment without a word the morning after he kissed you, who didn't bring it up a single time in the months that passed, who acted like nothing had changed between you, has been thinking he was your boyfriend this whole time?
“You kissed me…” you pronounce slowly. “And you just automatically took that to mean we're dating now,” is what you don't say, implied instead by your silence as you stare expectantly at him for an answer.
“You kissed me back,” he shrugs matter-of-factly.
“Wha- so that's that? You don't even- You didn't even think to ask if I was okay with it?” you gape at him.
“Well, you kissed me back,” he repeats, an infuriating grin settling on his lips. He leans in and you blush furiously as the tip of his nose stops just before bumping with yours. You shudder as you feel his breath against your skin and without meaning to, your eyes flick down to his lips and back to his eyes. He notices, of course he does, and his smirk just grows wider and you groan.
He stands up straight and laughs, snorting as he cups your face. “Unless you're not okay with it?” he teases.
“Oh just shut up and kiss me already,” you huff, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him toward you. You feel him tremble with laughter, anger melting away as his chapped lips collide with yours.
Guess you'll have to tell Komori he was right after all.
you were never enough and high school constantly proved that.
you barely got into to UA high and you desperately clawed your way to the top 5 in class. during the training you were never something special. never catching the eyes of agencies during the sports festival. heck you didn’t even make it to the 1-on-1 tournament. being top 5 was the only accomplishment you had.
during your time at UA, many of your classmates started developing crushes on one another . which many fizzled out, some turned into talking stages, and few went on dates. you were never a pageant queen. never praise for being pretty. you never caught anyone stealing glances from you or making excuses to get close to you. you came to terms to being average looking and most likely having to reap the consequences from it.
shoto was one of your many crushes. he was a quiet guy that never talked much to you. you were paired up with him once during training but his dialogue was short and forced. without much knowledge of who he was you only saw the attraction as physically.
denki was the most promising in terms of a relationship. he was funny, making sure everyone was laughing. he even kept conversation with you. he gave you compliments, paid for your food, and hung out constantly. you had his number and would pretty much talk everyday, but a talk with the girls, in your class, proved your insignificance.
Beep!
“ooo, whose that”, mina questioned, her eyes widening, when momo’s phone went off.
“pleasee, nobody special. it’s just denki, he’s been pestering me constantly,” momo rolled her eyes clicking her phone on silent.
“oh!” you thought.
“sameee it’s getting kinda of annoying, like just leave me alone!” ochaco squealed her disappointment in denki’s texts.
“i’m pretty sure he does that with every girl. desperate if you ask me,” mina signed going back to scrolling on her phone.
“guess i was never special,” you scrolled on your phone as a way to distract yourself.
after that, boys became an after thought in you head. “school and hero work is the only thing that will stay consistent in my life” is something you told yourself every time you wanted a relationship.
katsuki made that difficult. he seemed to be interested in you in his own way. there was once a fair during the weekend, which mina forced the whole class to go together. you were surprise that he decided to come along but even more surprised when he pulled you away from the group for it just to be you and him.
“come on, dumbass” katsuki muttered under his breath. catching your hand in his.
“wait!” he kept tugging you away from the group “what has gotten into you bakugo!” he shouted at him.
“don’t be so dramatic. i….i just want to get away from the extras.” he let go but avoided you gaze.
this was the start of a special relationship between you and katsuki. a couple months later, of him liking you in his own complex way, he confessed his feelings for you. it was over a walk in a park that you both frequently visited and after a nice dinner you both had.
you were on cloud 9. his love was so special and one that couldn’t be replicated. the princess treatment and “kindness”, in a very katsuki bakugo manner, that was only allowed for you. his physical affection that diminished any insecurities and brought significant comfort. his love was an one of a kind. his immense loyalty made you believe that the euphoria will last forever.
“class please welcome a transfer student, aniya,” aizawa announced.
it was as if an angel fell down from heaven. the girl was the beauty standard. golden, shiny blonde hair, baby blue eyes, and a nice figure. none of which compared to her face. almond eyes that sloped up. side profile that was sculpted out of marble. no imperfections and every feature perfectly balanced. a face that is once in a generation. “ i wonder if she knows she that gorgeous. i wonder how it feels” your eyes involuntarily darted to katsuki.
“of course…” you thought as you saw exactly what you prepared yourself for.
katsuki saw exactly what you saw. a perfect human. his dream girl. someone who is stronger, smarter, and more beautiful. someone that compliments him and not someone who will drag him down. someone whose energy doesn’t get wasted on but instead recharged, someone you will never be. you needed constant attention and reminders of you worth. you were to much to handle. you weren’t easy to love. you were never meant to be loved.
it didn’t take long for him to leave you. aniya was immediately attracted to him. katsuki didn’t take long to reciprocate. they were perfect for each other. many forgot of you and his relationship. many forgot of you. she was your replacement, a better version of you.
*timeskip*
UA was a small part of your life. though it was very impactful, it was short.
now you have your own agency and are the #7 hero in japan. top 10! the pain of high school seemed insignificant now. the joy you provide to citizens and fans, the protection you enforce, and the calm of your presence overshadows negative emotions of your own.
hero galas were constant and repetitive. the same speeches and celebrations. you rarely went unless something interesting was happening. you went alone. you were alone for most of your life after high school. rarely talking to classmates.
sitting down at the table marked with you name, you pulled out your phone to distract yourself.
“….y/n”
you turned you head to the voice to be met with katsuki bakugo.
“oh… hey!” you pulled out a fake smile. not wanting to see him.
“i know that this weird but i wanted to say that i’m sorry for how i ended things with you….” he trailed off, looking like this is a conversation he didn’t want to have.
“hey! it’s okay don’t worry about. we were young,” you shrugged your shoulders, hoping he will get the hint and leave.
“yea….well i still wanted you to know,” he looks you dead in the eyes. maybe he can see the lack of emotion in them.
you smiled at him softly as he left.
the conversation made you realize how lonely you were. no one to talk to about the weird talk you and katsuki just had. the fact that you haven’t dated since him. no one giving you the attention he did during the relationship. no one waiting for you. no one worried about you and whether you not you have taken care of yourself. just you by yourself. you looked around at all the connections being made and realized that you were alone.
after the speeches you will return home and see an empty house. one not made into a home. no one waiting. no touches and affection given. an unsettling quiet that will haunt you. leaving you to see your loneliness
a/n: lowkey venting; 1st write hope you all like it!
COMPUTA, how to get ISHIGAMI SENKU to like you?! COMPUTA???
Pairing: Senku x reader
COLLEGE AU
Synopsis: you were done getting done dirty so, you ask your good ol buddy Senku to whip you up a love potion by Valentine’s Day.
Has poorly written smut at the end, 💚 that will be my indicator for the scene.
A/n: enjoyyyyyyy this very rushed piece of literature!
W/c: 15k
I apologize in advance for grammar mistakes as I barely proofread it cause I skimmed going crossed ! And I apologize if I made Senku too ooc!
you chewed on your cheek as you tapped the tip of your pen on the paper. "What is it about me that's just so…" Your words trailed off because you couldn't find the appropriate phrase for your love life situation.
Case one. In other words, situationship one. You started talking to this guy from one of your classes.
What went wrong? You found him kissing another girl at a party is what went wrong. And that was AFTER he stood you up for your arcade date the very same day, saying he forgot about it 20 minutes after you'd been standing at your meet up spot and a hour after your conversation about said date.
Safe to say you but tapped him once or twice… okay three times. Anyways he was K.O. And the girl well she was pissed and ended up curb stopping him into the floor.
Case two. You really liked this guy, it was like he was made just for you. Best dates, beautiful face, nice body. And he was well versed in romance books as well as the females in taste books. You could only imagine how he was in bed. And you wouldn't have had to imagine it had you not seen his phone buzz with a pizza delivery contact.
The fuck kind of pizza delivery says "I miss you baby. When can I see you again?" Piece of shit.
You texted his phone and he had your contact name as Uber Eats . Fucking Uber Eats.
You may have gotten very violent but it was okay-cause, fucking Uber Eats? Did you look like a bitch who Ubers people food?
Those were your first and so far last… whatever you can call those and that was a year ago and you were sick and tired of being single.
Especially with Valentine's Day coming up in a month and 7 days. You would hate to have to stop your roomies fun time cause your stuck in the dorm cause your single.
Your friends are out the question cause surprise, surprise, every single one of them have someone and you have no one.
"Hey nitro." You rolled your eyes, looking up from the empty paper. "I told you. Stop calling me nitroglycerin man, it cringe and ugly as hell."
He cracked his neck, pulling out the chair beside you to take a seat. "Shouldn't you be in a lab somewhere making love to the chemicals and those excruciating formulas?"
He gave you a look of almost pure disbelief. "Never in my 20 years of living, did I ever expect to here someone sexualizing science. Something is seriously wrong with you. You need to stop reading or watching whatever it is that you're watching."
You took a sip of the latte. "Then I'd be just as boring and annoying as you." He scoffed, "you already have both of those checked off." Before you could curse him out he started speaking again. "Anyways, what are you doing with this paper? Another assignment?"
Your eyes trailed off from his down to the paper. "Sort of…" Your voice was quieter than before.
You both sat in silence as Senku watched you stare at the blank paper with a troubled look on your face.
He propped his elbow up on the table to hold the weight of his face as he continued to stare, wondering what's got that violent hot head so somber and quiet.
"Hey," his voice was soft. The back of his index and middle fingers tapped against your soft cheek. "What's wrong."
You pursed your lips, crossing your arms. "I just don't get it." You glared at the blank piece of paper. "Do I have, 'cheat on me or waste my time' written on my forehead?"
"Of course you don't, i'd tell you that much if you had that written on your head. But…" he trailed off rummaging through his bag to pull out a magnifying glass. "Let me see if it's written in your foreheads discoloration."
"Senku Ishigami—"
you were cut off by him grabbing your jaw turning your face towards his as he actually inspected your forehead.
You couldn't help but smile seeing his eye so magnified by the magnifying glass as he inspected your skin.
"No." He said in a sigh, "I don't see anything of the sort on you." He put it away. "Though of course I wasn't expecting to see something like that written on you anyways."
"I didn't either, so I was wondering why you actually checked."
He smiled letting your face go. "Just to make sure. You didn't get it tatted in your skin color on your forehead. I don't put that pass you when you're drunk."
"I wouldn't do something so degrading." He hummed, "maybe for a billion dollars you would."
"Hell yeah I'd tatt that on me for a billion dollars!" You smiled.
He stared at you for a moment, then let out a short exhale through his nose—not quite a laugh, but close. "Tch. That's exactly the kind of short-sighted thinking I'd expect from you." He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. "Let me break this down in terms your impulsive little brain might actually absorb."
You opened your mouth to protest, but he kept going.
"A billion dollars is just a number. A human construct. It can be printed, inflated, burned, rendered worthless by a market crash. But you—" He pointed at you, index finger aimed directly between your eyes. "—are a one-time biological event. Your exact neural architecture, your muscle fiber ratio, the way your ridiculous temper spikes your cortisol levels faster than a lab rat on stimulants... There is no currency, no amount of gold, no digital number in a bank account that can reproduce you. Your genome alone contains roughly 3.2 billion base pairs. You're already worth more than a billion dollars just in raw genetic data, and that's before factoring in consciousness."
He picked up his own drink and took a sip, utterly casual.
"So no. Don't degrade yourself by slapping a price tag on your forehead. It's scientifically inaccurate, and if you aren't buying me some savy tech to mess around with then there'd be no point." He shrugged.
Your eye twitched. "You know, had you left that last bit out I probably would've kissed you out of impulse."
He gave you a look of distaste. "I'm glad I added that on then."
"Ugh, I'm seriously convinced you're asexual at this point." He hummed, "I mean I just don't see the point in it. And you, no doubt show me exactly why, time and time again, that it is infact pointless. The only how it would be is if two people were to drink a love potion and fall in love with each other."
You could only agree with his statement. He was right to see no point in love. College sure as hell wasn't making it look any more appealing with your love life troubles.
"I guess you're right. If only I did have one though that would be cool…" your head whipped in his direction with a face full of glee and anticipation.
"Senku could you—"
"No."
"You asshat! You didn't even let me finish!"
He stood up from his chair shaking his head as he grabbed his bag. "I already know what your gonna say and it's preposterous."
You slammed your hands on the table as you stood up, your chair pushing back in the process. "Just think Senku do you know how well it would sell?! What kind of Nobel peace prize you'd get for making a freaking love potion?"
"No, no, no. The closet thing to a love potion is aphrodisiac. I'm a scientist but I'm not a crazy scientist out of touch with reality."
"I'll say." You muttered not so quietly. He flicked your forehead and tossed his empty cup in the trash.
"Come on Senku! Just do me this one favor pluh-ease! Man!" You tugged on his arm practically yanking him back into you.
You frowned, tugging him with a bit more strength and he crashed into you his nape hitting your nose and forehead.
He snatched his arm from you. "Stop pulling me like a damn ragdoll!"
"Dude you are seriously like… ridiculously light. Are you malnourished or something??"
Senku knew he didn't have the capacity to put up with too much more of your stupidity. Especially since he had Anatomy class with the big oaf next.
"Fine, i'll make the damn love potion just stop being so damn annoying." He dug in his ear in frustration with his hand on his hip.
Your eyes lit up just as much as your smile did. You couldn't contain your excitement and you jumped on the man, completely tackling him to the floor. "Thank you Senku! Can you try to have it done before Valentine's Day?"
"I can try but no promises alright? Now get your heavy ass off of me." Your mouth dropped open. "I'm not heavy you're just weak abnormally weak, actually." Your tone changed to that of a worried one mid sentence.
You picked yourself up off of him. "Alright, in return for making the love potion you are to come with me to the gym 4 days a week."
"I'll be damned if I go in that bacteria infested place." He said follows by a small, 'thank you'. As you helped him off the floor.
"Fine then, in your dorm. You probably can't even lift your body weight."
Great now he felt like he was talking the taiju. Senku shook his head. "Fine I can work with that." He said softer, more exhausted.
"Now I'm off to class, don't cause any trouble or hit anybody."
You smiled, "I won't!"
You didn't cause any trouble.
You did, however, become completely insufferable to one Senku Ishigami.
It started the next day, when you showed up at the chemistry lab with two coffees and an aggressively cheerful, "Good morning, partner."
He didn't look up from the beaker he was sterilizing. "I don't recall agreeing to a partnership."
"Too bad. I'm your project manager now." You set the coffee beside his elbow and pulled up a stool far closer than strictly necessary. "What are we working on?"
"We aren't working on anything. I'm working on isolating a dopamine agonist. You're working on being quiet."
"I can do that."
He shot you a deeply skeptical look. "You've never been quiet in your life."
"That's not true. I'm quiet when I sleep."
"You talk in your sleep. You told me this yourself."
You opened your mouth, closed it, and settled for pouting into your coffee. Senku made a small sound, not quite a laugh, but adjacent and returned to his work.
You didn't stay quiet, obviously. But you did learn to be useful in small ways. You handed him pipettes when he asked. You scribbled notes when he muttered observations aloud. You wiped down the counter when he spilled something that smelled aggressively like burnt sugar.
. . .
Three days into the "love potion project," Senku had officially commandeered a corner of the campus chem lab with a quiet, terrifying intensity that made other students avoid eye contact. Beakers. Burners. A centrifuge he definitely didn't have permission to use after hours. His notebook was a mess of formulas you couldn't begin to decipher, but you'd appointed yourself Head Note-Taker anyway, which mostly meant leaning over his shoulder and asking questions that made his eye twitch.
"Is that supposed to be pink?"
"No. Move your head, you're blocking the light."
"Can I add the next thing?"
"You can add nothing. You can sit there and not touch anything. That's your contribution."
You huffed, plopping onto the stool beside him and propping your chin in your hand. "I'm helping."
"You're helping a ton by hovering, thanks," he sarcastically praised without looking up. His fingers moved with surgical precision, pipetting a clear liquid into a vial. "There's a difference. Hovering introduces variables. Your body heat alone is raising the ambient temperature by approximately zero point three degrees."
"You're welcome. I'm keeping your samples warm."
He finally glanced at you, and there it was — that flat, unimpressed stare he wore like armour. But you were learning to spot the cracks. The slight downturn at the corner of his mouth that meant he was suppressing something. A smirk, maybe. Or just a obnoxious sigh.
"You want to help?" He slid a blank sheet of paper toward you. "Write down anything I say that sounds like a side effect. If this works — and it won't — it'll probably cause cardiac arrhythmia or temporary blindness."
You scribbled SIDE EFFECTS: heart explosion, blindness at the top. "Got it. Very love potion like."
"Romance is just a dopamine cascade with a cultural narrative slapped on top," he muttered, turning back to his vials. "The narrative is the problem. The cascade I can engineer."
You paused, pen hovering over the paper. "Wait. You actually think you can engineer the cascade?"
He didn't answer right away. His hands slowed over the equipment, and you watched something shift behind his eyes, that rare, hungry spark that only appeared when a problem was just out of reach. When it was actually worth solving.
"Dopamine, oxytocin, norepinephrine," he murmured, half to himself. "If I can create a compound that triggers simultaneous release — timed release, that's the hard part — it wouldn't be love. It would be the chemical experience of what humans mislabel as infatuation." He pushed his goggles up onto his forehead and turned to you, and the intensity in his gaze pinned you to your stool. "The question is, can I isolate that experience without the irrational attachment that follows. Because that's the part that makes people stupid."
Your mouth went dry. You weren't sure when he'd gotten so close — maybe he'd leaned in, maybe you had, but you could count his eyelashes now. The fluorescent lab lights made his red eyes look almost translucent at the edges.
"What about the part that makes people happy?" you asked, quieter than you meant to.
He stared at you for a beat too long. Then he turned back to his vials, but his voice had lost its clinical edge. "That's just serotonin. Boring."
You wrote SIDE EFFECT: emotionally constipated scientist under your other notes. He pretended not to see that, for now at least.
The first workout session was, objectively, a disaster.
Senku's dorm room was too small for two people to exist in comfortably, let alone exercise. You'd shoved his desk against the wall to clear a patch of floor barely big enough for a yoga mat, and he was currently staring at it like it might bite him.
"I can't do a push-up."
"Everyone can do a push-up."
"I've never had to do a push-up. My body is optimised for cognitive function, not gorilla activities."
You crossed your arms. "You called me heavy. Now you have to pay the price."
"That was a factual observation based on gravitational force and—"
"Drop and give me five, Senku."
The glare he leveled at you could have stripped paint. But he lowered himself onto the mat with the enthusiasm of a man approaching his own execution, and you absolutely did not stare at the way his shoulder blades pressed against his t-shirt when he positioned his hands.
It was... bad.
His arms shook. His back arched in all the wrong places. By rep two, he was making a sound somewhere between a grunt and a death rattle, and by rep three, he collapsed flat onto the mat with a dull thud.
"I'm done."
"You did three."
"And now I'm done. The human body has limits. I've found mine." He rolled onto his back, one arm draped dramatically over his forehead. His shirt had ridden up, exposing a sliver of stomach , a pale strip of skin just above his hipbone and your brain short-circuited for exactly one second before you wrestled your gaze to the ceiling.
"Okay, new plan." You dropped down beside him on the mat, deliberately leaving space between you. He didn't close it. Neither did you. "We're doing assisted push-ups."
"What does that mean?"
"It means I help." You hovered your hands over his back, not touching. "When you go down, I'll make sure you don't die. When you come up, I'll give you a little boost."
He turned his head on the mat to look at you, and the angle was dangerous. Red eyes, half-lidded with exhaustion, watching you with something unreadable. "This seems pointless."
"Shut up and push."
He pushed. And you touched him.
Your palms settled on his back — light at first, barely there — and his muscles tensed under the contact. You felt the heat of him through his shirt, the subtle shift of bone and sinew as he lowered himself down. Down. Up. Your hands rose and fell with him, guiding, steadying.
"Three," he counted, strained.
Your fingers pressed slightly harder on the ascent, giving him the barest lift. You felt his breath hitch.
"Four."
You realized you'd moved closer without meaning to. Your knee was pressed against his hip now. Your shadow fell across his back, and you could see the individual hairs at the nape of his neck, slightly damp with sweat.
"Five," he exhaled, and collapsed.
Your hands slipped (or maybe you let them slip) and you caught yourself with your hands, braced on either side of his waist. He was flat on his stomach beneath you, breathing hard, and you were hovering over him. Your chest nearly touched his back. Your lips were level with the curve of his ear.
Silence. Nothing but his breathing and yours.
"Your hands are still on me," he said, muffled against the mat.
"Do you want me to move them?"
A pause. Longer than it should have been.
You were so close could hear his heartbeat through his ribs, too fast for someone who'd only done five assisted push-ups. Or maybe that was your own pulse, hammering in your ears.
"Your heart rate is elevated," you murmured.
"Yours too."
"I just did push-ups."
"So did I. Metaphorically."
Something shifted in the air between you. He turned his head, just enough that one red eye caught yours over his shoulder. His lips were parted. His cheek was flushed. And you were close, so close you could see the faint ring of darker red around his iris, close enough to count his eyelashes, close enough that if you just leaned down—
His phone buzzed on the desk.
You scrambled off him with a speed that was frankly embarrassing, and he sat up with a sharp inhale, running a hand through his hair. His shirt was still rucked up. You stared pointedly at the wall.
"That's enough for today," he said, his voice rougher than usual.
"Same time tomorrow?"
He didn't look at you. "Yeah. Tomorrow."
. . .
Three weeks in and the love potion wasn’t cooperating. Senku’s notebook had tripled in size, and the trash bin was full of shattered vials. Every failed batch made him crankier, but it also made him more absorbed, which meant he stopped swatting you away when you leaned over his shoulder to read his notes.
“That’s phenylethylamine ,” he muttered, pointing at a formula. “Naturally occurring. Found in chocolate. It’s part of the infatuation cascade, but it metabolizes too fast. I need a stabilizer.”
You nodded like you understood. “So… chocolate’s a love drug?”
“Barely. It’s a marketing gimmick.” He pushed his goggles up onto his forehead and rubbed his eyes. “The real trick is oxytocin. The bonding chemical. But that’s typically released through physical touch, not ingestion. I’d need to trick the brain into producing it without the actual contact.”
You propped your chin on his shoulder without thinking. “Couldn’t you just, like, synthesize it?”
He went very still beneath you. “I could. But nasal sprays are inelegant. I’m aiming for an oral compound. Delayed release. Targeted receptors.”
You hummed against his shoulder blade, and you felt his spine straighten almost imperceptibly. “You smell like chemicals,” you murmured.
There was a faint hint of something crisp underneath.
“That’s acetone.” He answered.
“Smells good.”
He turned his head just enough to side-eye you. “Acetone is a solvent. It dissolves things. That’s not ‘good,’ that’s olfactory confusion.”
But he didn’t tell you to move. And you stayed there, chin on his shoulder, breathing in acetone and something warmer beneath it, until the timer on the centrifuge beeped and he shook you off with a grumble.
Later that night, after all your classes and a shitty workout that could barely be called such, you were lying in your dorm bed, you stared at the ceiling and replayed the moment. The stillness of him. The way his voice had dropped half a register when he said olfactory confusion.
You pressed your palm to your chest. Your heart was doing the skip again. "ah shit…" you muttered pulling the blanket over your head. You definitely had a crush on this little quirky science nerd.
. . .
"You have a crush on the mad scientist?" Kohaku seemed genuinely stuck. "But how? Why? he's not even your type— Wait—"
"Right I don't have a type. Good looks and a nice personality are the winners every time."
She tucked her lips raising her eyebrows in a motion of disbelief. "Yeah and the shit heads before were good looking with a nice personality." The sarcasm was practically oozing out of her pores right now. You took a long sip of your drink as she continued.
"Senku also is not good looking and his personality is shitty as hell." You disagree with a shake of your head, "sure he's blunt and doesn't have a romantic bone in his body but honestly out of everyone here who isn't taken, I'd bet my life Senku wouldn't even have the thought to cheat if we did get together. I'd be competing with the lab not a person."
She gave you a look similar to this flight streamer meme you saw on Tiktok, she was so done with your bullshit. "But I wouldn't be competing much because, I mean being in the lab with him isn't bad. I've actually learned more with Senku than I did in chemistry in high school. And it's a lot more fun just seeing him so… I dont know… passion driven?"
"Name one thing you've learned about that I wouldn't know." You smacked your lips, "You're a phys ed major. You would know everything about the body and hormones and all that stuff!" You tried to reason.
"Yeah don't give me that bullshit, name one."
You huffed, Your eyes wondering and falling on the cookies on your plate. "Oh!" You started with a snap of your fingers. "Did you know Phenylethylamine is a naturally occurring monoamine alkaloid and trace amine that acts as a central nervous system stimulant in humans? I mean most of it breaks down and metabolizes before it reaches the brain but yeah, did you know that?"
She pursed her lips trying to hide the smile. "No I didn't." You did a mini celebration of stuffing a chocolate chip cookie in your mouth. "I told you I was learning stuff with him."
She let out a sigh. "Alright I'll trust you on it but if he hurts you I'm not letting it slide." You smile. "I wouldn't stop you." You reassured her, placing your hand on top of hers giving it a squeeze.
"Well there's not much to stop, because Senku is like… Seriously… Weak." You winced even having to have those words come out your mouth. And Kohaku was back to looking at you as if you'd grown two heads.
"Oh hell no! No friend of mines is gonna be with some dude who can't even throw a proper punch let alone keep up with you in the bedroom." She whispered the last part you could feel the heat rising up your neck. "Kohaku! I'm not some rabbit in heat!"
"Girl I seen you're tumblr account. You follow Tonycries and Sweetheartucism. I know what you are." She sounded so sure of herself. And you were nothing but jaw dropped at this information that was supposed to be yours only.
"How did you know?" She shook her head, "If you didn't want people to know you really should turn off your tumblr notifications."
Thats a no can do.
You gasped. "He also knows practically everything about me so I don't have to explain." You smile as the pros just kept stacking themselves only heightening your fondness in the male.
Kohaku pursed her lips once more, propping her chin on her palm. "When you put it like that I guess you two weirdos are a match made in weirdness."
You flipped her off.
Still although you had this new found information about yourself you had no plans on confessing to the boy at least not any time soon, you think.
. . .
The weeks settled into a rhythm before you realized you had started looking forward to it. Lab sessions turned into workouts( that kohaku decided to join in on to help him and you), which turned into half-finished conversations over text, the kind that started with some random fact Senku sent like it was urgent and ended with you waking up to your phone slipping from your hand.
He was still Senku. Blunt, sarcastic, impossible to impress intentionally. He still acted like sentiment was some useless variable that only got in the way.
But there were little changes.
A stool already pulled out beside his worktable when you came in.
An explanation repeated a second time, slower, without making you feel stupid for needing it.
The brief glance he gave you after something finally worked, like he wanted to see if you had caught it too.
And before you knew it you were just 3 weeks away from valentines day.
. . .
You were planted on the stool, hunched over his notes, trying to decipher a formula that looked less like chemistry and more like greek language. Senku had been muttering to himself for the last twenty minutes, pacing behind you, his footsteps a steady pace you'd grown weirdly comforted by.
Then the pacing stopped.
"You've been staring at that page for forty-three minutes," he said from directly behind you. "Your retention rate is probably abysmal right now."
"Maybe your handwriting is abysmal."
He ignored that. You felt him lean down, his presence a sudden warmth at your back. "Move over."
You scooted sideways on the stool, expecting him to correct your notes. Instead, he reached around you and slid a clean Erlenmeyer flask onto the counter, followed by a small beaker of clear liquid and a glass pipette.
"I think it's time you graduated from passive observer to active participant," he said, his voice closer to your ear than strictly necessary. "You're always complaining about not understanding the practical applications."
"Because you never let me touch anything."
"Correction. I never let you touch anything unsupervised." His hand appeared in your peripheral vision, gesturing toward the setup. "This is a phenolphthalein titration. A classic acid-base reaction, but the indicator makes it worth watching. Phenolphthalein is colorless in acidic conditions, but once the solution becomes even slightly basic—"
"It turns pink," you finished, remembering a vague high school demonstration. "Right?"
"Magenta, technically. And don't interrupt." But there was no bite in it. He moved closer, his chest grazing your shoulder blades as he positioned the flask in front of you. "The sodium hydroxide is already in the flask. You're going to add the hydrochloric acid, drop by drop, until you hit the equilibrium point. The endpoint is sharp. You'll know it when you see it."
He placed the pipette in your hand, and before you could fumble it, his fingers wrapped around yours. His palm was cool against your knuckles, his grip precise and steady.
"Slowly," he instructed, guiding your hand toward the flask. "One drop at a time. Don't rush it."
You exhaled. You hadn't realized you'd been holding your breath.
Drop. The solution swirled, clear as water. Drop. Still clear. Drop. You felt Senku's other hand settle on the counter beside you, caging you in on one side, his body a warm line of pressure against your back. You could feel his breathing: measured, even; and it was completely at odds with the way your own pulse was hammering.
"Wait for it," he murmured, and you felt the vibration of his voice travel down your spine.
Drop.
The liquid in the flask erupted into a vivid, brilliant magenta so sudden and so saturated it looked like a gemstone catching light. You gasped, a small, genuine sound of delight, and your free hand flew up to grip his wrist without thinking.
"Pretty," you breathed.
"Precision chemistry. The color change indicates a pH shift of exactly—"
You turned your head to look at him, and the explanation died on his lips. He was already looking at you.
Not the flask.
You.
His face was inches away. You could count his eyelashes. See the ring of darker crimson around his irises. Your hand was still in his, the pipette frozen mid-air, and his other hand had somehow shifted to rest on the edge of the stool beside your hip.
"Your pupils are dilated," he observed, his voice lower than before.
"So are yours."
"That's—"
"If you say 'data,' I'm going to hit you."
His lips curved, a barely-there smirk that softened the sharp lines of his face. "I was going to say 'unexpected.'"
"Liar."
Neither of you moved. His thumb traced the back of your hand deliberate, or maybe unconscious, you couldn't tell anymore. The magenta liquid glowed softly in your peripheral vision, but you couldn't look away from him. His breath fanned warm across your cheek. His forehead almost brushed yours.
"Senku."
"Yeah."
His forehead touched yours. His eyes fluttered half-closed. You felt the tip of his nose graze the side of your own, and your lips parted on a shaky exhale, and he was right there, close enough that if you just leaned forward the barest fraction of an inch—
A timer beeped.
You both jolted. The pipette slipped from your slack grip and clattered onto the counter, spattering tiny magenta droplets across the notes you'd spent forty-three minutes staring at.
"That's the centrifuge," he said, his voice rough at the edges. Hoarse.
"Better get that."
"Yeah."
Neither of you moved for a long, aching second. His hand was still curled around yours. His forehead was still pressed to yours. You could feel the rise and fall of his chest against your shoulder, faster than it had been a moment ago.
Then he pulled away. The cold air rushed in where his warmth had been, and you sat there on the stool gripping the edge of the counter like it was the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth.
He crossed to the centrifuge without looking back. But his ears were pink. Pink enough that phenolphthalein would've had nothing on them.
You looked down at the scattered magenta droplets on his notes, and you pressed your fingers to your own lips. Oh, how bad you wanted to press your lips against his.
The following morning your phone buzzed with a invite from a widely know sophomore, Ryusui Nanami. The nepo baby, and the only nepo baby you actually liked. It was a birthday bash.
Later that day you sat in a chair opposite to the one and only—
"If you have something to say, say it woman. You'll go crosseyed with all that looking up and down." Senku looked at you through his black frames, finger now hovering over the keys on his computer. "Are you going to Ryusui's party?"
Senku gave you a knowing look. "Do I look like the type to waste my time on that?"
Obviously not, but it didn't hurt to ask. "I figured I'd ask since Ryusui is a friend of yours too." He gave you that familiar half-smirk without looking away from his screen. “Ryusui knows me well enough to know I don’t do parties. Especially not ones with zero practical benefit. You have fun, though. I’ll probably be in the lab, so you can tell me how it went when you get back.”
"I'll think about it." you leaned back with a lazy smile.
. . .
You said that but here you were standing in front of your mirror all dolled up and looking beautiful for the party. Sure you looked pretty but now that it actually came too it. You weren't exactly feeling a party. Plus what was the point?
You didn’t want the noise, the sweat, the small talk shouted over bass. You didn’t want to watch your friends pair off into corners or dodge the third guy in a row who’d ask for your number and then forget your name two minutes later.
Now you wanted to take it all off and crawl into bed.
You sit down on the edge of your bed and stare at your phone. Your thumb hovers over the group chat. Then it drifts, almost involuntarily, to a different thread. One with a lot fewer emojis and a lot more dry one-liners.
The typing bubble appears. Disappears. Appears again. You don't hesitate to click on the chat now, a smile already making its way to your face before you even see his message.
Senku: I ordered some pizza, no pineapple on it, and a two litter of you know what. Come over so we can share and talk about the love potion.
You immediately reply 'omw!! You better not be lying about my favorite drink!' And kick off your heels and undress and dress into something more comfortable, some sweats and a cute quirky hoodie you snatched from Senku. You slipped into your slides and you were off with a text to your friends telling them not to wait for you.
The apartment door swings open before you even knock.
Senku is standing there in sweatpants and a faded t-shirt, his glasses slightly askew, his hair pulled back with a few look white to green strands framing his face. He couldn't help the smile smile that you pulled to his face when he saw you saw excited at his door step. He quickly stepped to the side letting you in.
"We're not talking about the love potion. I wanna give it a rest for tonight. Instead You can find something for us to watch, Since I don't think you'd like my choices all that much." You walked in taking your shoes off at the door. "Thanks cause, Although i like bill nye the science guy I don't think I want to watch that while I'm eating, no offense."
He shook his head closing the door. "None taken." He said and placed a pair of house shoes in front of you to put on, which you easily slipped into and walked deeper into his apartment styled dorm.
His apartment was quiet. Not the sterile, empty quiet of a place that wasn't lived in, but the comfortable quiet of a space that had settled around its occupant. The main room was a modest living area with a small kitchenette tucked into the corner—full-size fridge, two-burner stove, a rice cooker on the counter that looked more used than the actual stove. A futon couch faced a low coffee table cluttered with a laptop, a stack of journals, and the pizza box he'd promised. The lighting was warm, not fluorescent, and there was a throw blanket draped over the back of the futon couch that you were pretty sure his dad had sent him. (really nice man btw)
Your eyes drifted to the hallway branching off from the living room. Two doors. One was slightly ajar, his room, you assumed, from the glimpse of a desk and more books stacked in precarious towers. The other door was closed.
Oh, how you sometimes wished you'd applied yourself more in high school. Your dorm was a shoebox with a microwave and a roommate whose boyfriend practically lived there. This—this was a palace. A quiet, lavender -scented palace.
You sat on the couch, immediately grabbing the throw blanket to toss over your shoulders and get comfortable. The fabric was soft, worn-in, and smelled faintly of lavender—which surprised you, honestly. You'd expected Senku to be the type to buy whatever detergent was cheapest.
"Your roommate go to the party?" you asked, tucking your feet up under you.
"My roommate moved out a while ago. It's just been me."
You paused mid-blanket-adjustment. "Wait, seriously? He just... left?"
"End of last semester. He said he couldn't sleep when I was running simulations at three in the morning." Senku shrugged, setting two glasses on the coffee table. "His loss. The university never bothered to reassign anyone, so I've had the place to myself."
You looked around the apartment with fresh eyes—the two closed doors in the hallway, the full-size fridge, the bathroom you didn't have to share with twelve other people. "So you've just been here. Alone. In a two-bedroom apartment."
"That's what I said."
"Do you know how much I would kill for this kind of setup? My dorm is literally a closet with a microwave."
"I've seen your dorm. It's not a closet. Closets have better ventilation."
You threw a pillow at him. He caught it without looking.
You laughed and clicked on a rom-com you'd seen a dozen times but never got tired of. Light, familiar, easy to half-watch while you ate. Senku didn't comment on the choice, just handed you a glass of Sprite and settled back into the couch cushions.
The movie started. You ate pizza straight from the box, licking grease off your fingers, and Senku made a comment about how napkins existed for a reason, and you told him to stop being a neat freak, and he said he wasn't a neat freak, he just didn't see the point in making a mess when the solution was right there, and you shoved a napkin in his face and told him to relax.
At some point, your head ended up on his shoulder. You weren't sure when exactly it happened—one minute you were sitting up, the next you'd sort of... leaned. He didn't push you off. After a moment, his arm shifted along the back of the couch, not quite around you, but close enough that you could feel the warmth of him near your shoulders.
You smiled against his shoulder and turned your attention back to the screen. The couple on-screen was having one of those big, dramatic fights where everything was a misunderstanding that could've been solved with a single conversation. Usually, you found those scenes frustrating. Tonight, they just made you feel grateful. Whatever this thing with Senku was—friendship, something more, something you hadn't named yet—it was straightforward. No games. No wondering where you stood.
"Hey," you said, not lifting your head.
"What."
"I'm glad you texted."
He didn't say anything. But his arm slid down from the back of the couch to rest across your shoulders, light and careful, and you felt him exhale, long and slow, like he'd been holding something in without realizing it.
"Me too," he said.
Somewhere between the next two movies you found yourself on top of senku laying on his chest in a half asleep state.
"Hey." Your name fell off his lips softly, barely above a whisper.
You made a sound that was supposed to be "yeah?" but came out more like a hum.
"If you wanna get out of that shoebox of a dorm..." He paused. You felt his chest rise beneath your cheek. "My door is always open."
The words hung in the quiet of the apartment. You blinked, sleep retreating just enough for you to process what he'd said. My door is always open. Not "the spare room is available." Not "you could crash here if you need to." His door. Always open.
You lifted your head just enough to look at him. His face was closer than you expected—your noses were inches apart. His glasses were crooked. His hair was a mess against the couch cushion. But his eyes were steady on yours, and there was something in them you hadn't seen before. Something careful. Something that looked a lot like hope trying not to show itself too loudly.
"You mean that?" you asked, your voice scratchy with sleep.
"I don't say things I don't mean."
"Like, move in? For real?"
"For real." He said it casually, like it wasn't a big deal, but his hand still rubbing circles on your back.
"For real." He said it casually, like it wasn't a big deal, but his hand was still rubbing slow circles on your back, and his heartbeat under your palm had picked up just enough to betray him.
You let the offer hang there for a second, letting yourself actually imagine it. Your own room. A real kitchen. A bathroom you didn't have to share with half the floor. And Senku. Coffee in the mornings. Pizza at midnight. The quiet, lavender-scented hum of this place that already felt more like home than your dorm ever had.
"Okay," you said.
His hand paused on your back. "Okay?"
"Yeah. I mean, you're offering me a bedroom and a kitchen and no roommate's boyfriend walking around in a towel. Why would I say no?"
"There are probably reasons."
"I don't care about those." You dropped your head back down to his chest, your smile pressing into his shirt. "I care about having a bathroom I don't need flip-flops for. I'm in."
He didn't answer right away. Then his hand started moving again on your back, and you felt his chest rise with a breath that came out just a little shakier than usual.
"That was fast."
"I'm a decisive person."
"You cried over which cereal to buy last week."
"Decision-making is different from cereal. Cereal is important." You tilted your head up just enough to catch his eye. "This one was easy."
His expression flickered, something soft, something he didn't quite hide fast enough. And then he looked away, reaching up to adjust his glasses even though they were still crooked.
"And you can't complain about the acetone smell. It's a non-negotiable."
"I've never complained about the acetone smell."
"You made a face once."
"I made a face because you almost set the counter on fire. That had nothing to do with the acetone."
He huffed, and you felt it more than heard it, a soft rush of air that might have been a laugh if he'd let it be one. His arm tightened around your shoulders, just a fraction.
"You're really moving in," he said, quieter now.
"Looks like it."
"Okay."
"Okay."
Neither of you moved. The movie had ended a while ago, the screen dark, the apartment quiet except for the hum of the fridge and the distant sound of wind against the windows. You should probably get up. Go back to your dorm. Start figuring out boxes and move-in dates and whatever else came with upending your entire living situation.
Instead, you let your eyes close again, your cheek pressed to the soft cotton of his shirt, his heartbeat steady under your ear.
"Hey, Senku?"
"What now."
"Thanks for not going to the party."
His thumb traced a slow arc across your shoulder blade. "Parties are overrated."
"You've never even been to one." You smile.
"I don't need to go to know they're overrated. I have evidence."
"You have assumptions."
"I have you, showing up at my door in my hoodie instead of at Ryusui's with a champagne glass. That's enough evidence."
You smiled against his chest. "That's almost sweet."
"It's just an observation."
"Sure it is."
He didn't dignify that with a response. But his hand kept moving on your back, slow and steady, and you let yourself sink deeper into the couch, into the warmth, into the quiet certainty that for the first time in a long time, you were exactly where you were supposed to be.
The following day was a blur of boxes and dust and running up and down stairs that, by hour two, you were genuinely starting to resent.
Packing had been easier than you'd expected. Your dorm was tiny, a shoebox, as Senku liked to remind you, so there wasn't much to pack. Three mugs. Your microwave. The ice maker you'd splurged on last summer. A lamp shaped like a mushroom that you'd found at a thrift store. Your fluffy rug, the pink one that shed everywhere. Your TV, which was small enough to carry under one arm. Clothes. Photos. A polaroid of you and Kohaku at last year's spring festival. The throw pillows you'd bought specifically because Senku said he hated them.
That was it. That was your whole life, boxed up and ready to go.
Kohaku showed up at nine in the morning, hair pulled back, looking like she was ready to run a marathon.
"You're really doing this," Kohaku said, lifting a box labeled MUGS + KITCHEN STUFF like it weighed nothing. "Moving in with the guy."
"He's not 'the guy.' He's Senku."
"That's what I said."
You grabbed your lamp and the rug, leaving the desk where it was—it belonged to the university anyway. "Are you going to be weird about this the whole time?"
"Probably." She started down the hallway. "Has he always looked that tired, or is that new?"
"That's just his face."
"Hm."
The walk across campus was cold. Your breath fogged in the air. You'd made this walk so many times before, but today your arms were full of your belongings, and the weight of it felt significant in a way you couldn't quite name.
When you got to the apartment, the door was propped open. Senku was inside, dragging the spare room's old desk into the hallway. He'd already cleared out the broken lamp and the boxes of his old roommate's stuff that had been sitting in the corner. His hair was messier than usual, and there was a dust smear across his forehead.
"Your stamina's improved," you said, stepping over the threshold.
"Kohaku's been making me do lunges." He took the rug from your arms without asking and carried it into the spare room. "She said my form was a disgrace to human physiology."
"I heard that," Kohaku called from the stairwell.
"It wasn't a secret." He said louder
Yuzuriha floated in behind you, already unwrapping the onigiri. "I brought snacks. Where should I put them?"
"Kitchen counter's fine." Senku reappeared, wiping his hands on his jeans. "Fair warning, the cabinet space is limited. I have beakers in the top shelf."
"Why do you have beakers in your kitchen?"
"They're clean."
"They're still beakers."
"Beakers are just cups with measurements on the side."
You left them to that debate and went into the spare room. It was small but bright—a window facing the campus green, a closet with actual doors, a light fixture that didn't flicker. Your mushroom lamp was already plugged in by Yuzuriha, casting a warm yellow glow across the bare floor. Your rug was rolled out in the center of the room, pink and fluffy and completely at odds with Senku's aesthetic. It was perfect.
Kohaku appeared in the doorway, leaning against the frame. "Not bad."
"Right? I have a closet. A real closet."
"I saw." She crossed her arms and watched you unroll the rug the rest of the way. "You know, I was skeptical."
"About whate?"
"About him." She jerked her chin toward the living room, where Senku was explaining to Yuzuriha why beakers were objectively better than regular cups. "I thought he was all ego. Too much brain, not enough heart. But he's different with you."
You sat back on your heels and looked up at her. "Different how?" You knew he was different with you, you were just a sucker for hearing how much your soon to be boo adored you so much.
"Patient. Attentive. He actually listens when you talk." She shrugged, like it wasn't a big deal. "I still think he needs to work on his core strength, but... he's not an asshole. Not to you, anyway."
"That's so sweet."
"It's an observation, not a compliment. Don't get used to it."
You smiled and went back to arranging your rug. But you caught Kohaku's expression before she pushed off the doorframe, the faintest hint of approval, quickly hidden.
…
Your new living arrangements were, in a word, heavenly.
The apartment was quiet when you needed it to be. The bathroom was always free. The kitchen had a full-size fridge that didn't hum like it was on its last legs, and you could cook at two in the morning without worrying about waking up a roommate who had an 8 a.m. class. The lavender-scented throw blanket had somehow migrated from the back of the futon to your bed, and Senku hadn't mentioned it. Either he hadn't noticed or he'd decided it wasn't worth the argument.
You'd expected to see more of him. That was the whole point, wasn't it? Living together, sharing space, the easy domestic rhythm you'd both slipped into so naturally. But the universe had other plans. The week after your move-in was brutal. Two major projects landed on your desk at the same time, both with deadlines that made your stomach clench. Your classmates, predictably, were useless. One of them kept promising to finish his section "by tonight" and then went radio silent. Another submitted work so sloppy you had to rewrite it from scratch. Your group chat was a graveyard of unanswered messages and passive-aggressive thumbs-up reactions.
And then there were the discussion posts. God, the discussion posts. Two hundred words on a topic you couldn't care less about, plus two replies to classmates whose posts were just as uninspired as yours. You found yourself typing phrases like "I really appreciated your perspective" and "you raised some interesting points" while your soul slowly left your body.
Senku was just as buried. You heard him leave early most mornings, the soft click of the front door, the shuffle of his bag, and he didn't come back until late. His own project load was apparently monstrous. Something about simulations that kept failing and a professor who didn't believe in extensions. He'd text you sometimes, a dry observation about a classmate or a complaint about the lab equipment, but actual face-to-face time was rare.
You'd cross paths in the kitchen at odd hours. Him, bleary-eyed, waiting for the coffee maker to finish. You, hunched over your laptop at the counter, typing furiously while a microwave burrito spun in circles. He'd grunt. You'd grunt back followed by a lazy chuckle. It was practically a love language at this point.
One night, you came home close to midnight, your bag heavy with textbooks and your brain feeling like static. The apartment was dark except for the lamp in the living room. Senku was on the futon, his laptop open, his glasses reflecting a spreadsheet you couldn't begin to parse. He looked up when you walked in.
"You look like shit."
"Thanks. You look like you haven't slept in days."
"2 days I havent slept a wink." He pushed his glasses up and rubbed his eyes. "There's leftover rice in the fridge. I made too much."
You dropped your bag by the door and shuffled to the kitchen. The rice was still in the cooker, warm and waiting. You didn't bother with a plate. Just grabbed a spoon and ate straight from the pot, leaning against the counter with your eyes half-closed.
Senku appeared in the doorway. "That's unsanitary."
"You're unsanitary."
"Brilliant comeback." He grabbed a spoon of his own and joined you at the pot. No plate for him either. "How's the project?"
"One teammate ghosted. Another one sent me a paragraph that looked like it was written by a chatbot. I have three discussion posts due tomorrow and I haven't started any of them." You took another bite of rice. "You?"
"Simulation crashed again. Lost six hours of data. Professor wants a revised proposal by Friday." He paused. "I also forgot to eat lunch. And breakfast, probably."
"Senku."
"I had coffee. Which has calories." he quickly added the last part.
You didn't have the energy to lecture him. So you just pushed the rice pot closer to his side of the counter, and the two of you stood there in the dim kitchen light, eating cold rice at midnight, too tired to talk but too tired to be alone.
It wasn't romantic. It wasn't anything like the movies. But it was real, and when Senku's shoulder bumped yours and stayed there, you didn't move away.
"Two more days," he said quietly. "Then the deadline's over."
"Two more days for me too," you echoed.
"We should do something after. Get out of the apartment."
"Like a date?"
He didn't answer for a moment. Then: "I was going to say 'get pizza,' but if you want to call it a date, that's acceptable."
"You're such a romantic." You roll your eyes.
"I'm pragmatic. Pizza is efficient."
You smiled into the rice pot and let your head drop onto his shoulder. He didn't tense up. Didn't pull away. Just shifted his weight slightly so you fit better against him, and kept eating rice like this was the most normal thing in the world.
The next two days passed in a blur of deadlines and caffeine. You submitted your last discussion post at 11:47 PM with all the enthusiasm of someone signing a terms-and-conditions agreement, then closed your laptop and stared at the ceiling for a solid ten minutes. Done. Finally done.
Senku's deadline had wrapped up the same evening. You knew because you'd come home to find him passed out on the futon, his laptop still open on his chest, a half-empty mug of cold coffee on the floor beside him. You'd pulled the throw blanket over him and gone to bed.
The next morning, you woke up to the smell of actual breakfast. Eggs. Rice. Something sizzling in a pan.
You shuffled into the kitchen in your pajamas—his hoodie, sweatpants, hair stuffed away in your bonnet, and found Senku at the stove. His hair was pulled back, kind of messily. He was poking at a pan of scrambled eggs like he wasn't totally sure what they were supposed to do.
"You're cooking," you said, your voice still scratchy.
He glanced over his shoulder. "Trying to. Sit down."
You sat. The table had two plates on it, two mugs, and for some reason your mushroom lamp was in the middle. The rice cooker was going. The eggs looked a little uneven but they smelled good.
"When did you learn to make eggs?"
"Taiju's mom sent me a cookbook a while back. Figured I should probably use it at some point." He scraped the eggs onto your plate and sat down across from you. "Eat. Before it gets cold."
You picked up your chopsticks. He did the same. Neither of you talked for a bit. The eggs were decent—maybe a little too much salt, but you weren't about to complain, you'll just wake up earlier to help next time. The rice was warm. The coffee was fresh.
It was weird, how much had changed. A month ago you were in a shoebox dorm eating microwave ramen and dodging your roommate's boyfriend. Now you were here. Real kitchen. Real breakfast. A guy who made you eggs even though he'd clearly rather be sleeping.
"You're staring," Senku said, not looking up.
"I'm thinking." You took a sip of coffee. "Hey. You said something about pizza earlier this week. Before the deadlines hit. Is that still happening?"
"If you want it to. Or..." He set his chopsticks down and leaned back in his chair. "There's a meteor shower tonight. Peak visibility is around 10 PM. The observatory's open to students, but most people don't bother because it's cold and 'stargazing is boring' or whatever." He adjusted his mugs position. "I was going to go either way. You're welcome to join."
"Senku Ishigami, are you asking me on a stargazing date?"
"I'm asking you to observe a predictable astronomical event in the company of someone who won't ask stupid questions about aliens." He paused. "If that fits your definition of a date, then yes."
You grinned into your coffee. "What time should I be ready?"
"Nine-thirty. Bring a jacket. It's cold out there."
"Okay."
"Okay?"
"Okay, I'll go." You reached over and stole a bite of his eggs. "But you're buying me pizza tomorrow."
"I already bought you pizza last week."
"And now you're buying it again."
He looked at you for a second, something soft flickering behind his tired eyes. Then he pushed his plate toward you. "Just take the rest. You're already stealing it anyway."
You didn't argue. "Oh and next time just be straight about taking me on a date no need to beat around the bush. You know I'll say yes."
"I was beating around the bush?"
You smiled into your next bite, "yes, you were."
…
The observatory was at the edge of campus, perched on a hill that overlooked the whole town. You'd walked past it a hundred times but never gone inside. Tonight, the main telescope was open to students, but Senku bypassed it entirely and led you to a flat patch of grass just outside the dome.
"The telescope's fine, but the real view is better with the naked eye," he said, spreading a blanket on the cold ground. "Meteor showers are about breadth, not magnification. You want to see as much of the sky as possible."
"I'll take your word for it."
You settled onto the blanket beside him, your shoulders touching, your breath fogging in the cold air. The sky was impossibly clear. No clouds, no moon, just an endless sweep of stars with the faint, dusty ribbon of the Milky Way cutting through the center.
Senku pointed. "There. That's the radiant. The Perseids. Well, not the Perseids, wrong time of year, but a smaller shower. The meteors will look like they're coming from that point."
You followed his finger but didn't see anything yet. Just stars. So many stars…
"How come you know so much unrelated to science?"
"Well, science explains a lot of things. There's always more knowledge to be learned."
"Most people just look at stars and think they're pretty."
"Most people are intellectually lazy." He glanced at you. "You're not most people."
"That might be the nicest thing you've ever said to me."
"Don't let it go to your head."
The first meteor streaked across the sky—a quick, silver flash that was gone almost before you could register it. You gasped and grabbed his arm without thinking.
"There! Did you see that?"
"I saw it. There'll be more."
There were. Every few minutes, another streak of light, so fast and bright it felt like the sky was putting on a show just for the two of you. You lay back on the blanket, your head pillowed on your arms, and Senku did the same beside you. His hand found yours in the dark. His fingers were cold, but his grip was steady.
"Hey," you said quietly.
"Hm."
"Thanks for this. For the stars. For the eggs this morning. For..." You gestured vaguely at everything. "Being you."
He was quiet for a moment. Then his thumb brushed across your knuckles.
"You've been happier lately. Since we started spending more time together. Since you moved in. Your mood's improved. You're not snapping as much. Less stress-eating at midnight." He paused. "I know I said I couldn't make a love potion. That the whole thing was a failure. But I think maybe I was overcomplicating it. Love isn't something you can synthesize in a lab—I already knew that. But it's also not some big dramatic thing you have to prove. It's just... this. Being around each other. Paying attention. Showing up."
He turned his head on the blanket to look at you. His face was half in shadow, but his eyes caught the starlight.
"Listen. You know I don't care much for grand gestures. They're inefficient and usually performative. But I know if I want to make you feel secure in all of this, I have to actually ask. So." He adjusted his grip on your hand, a nervous habit you'd catalogued weeks ago. "Can I be your boyfriend?"
You stared at him for a second. Then you laughed—not at him, just at the wording, the way he'd flipped it around like he was applying for a position.
"Usually people say 'will you be my girlfriend.'"
"I'm surprised you haven't noticed by now that I'm not exactly categorized with the regular masses."
"No," you said, squeezing his hand. "You're not. And yeah. Of course I'd love it if you were my boyfriend."
He exhaled, and some of the tension left his shoulders. "Okay. Good."
"Good?"
"That's what I said."
…
The week before Valentine's Day, Senku finally finished the love potion.
Not the love potion, he'd been clear about that from the start. What he'd actually made was something closer to a highly targeted oxytocin-dopamine compound, designed to temporarily mimic the neurochemical state of early infatuation without the irrational decision-making that usually came with it. He'd spent the last two weeks refining it, running simulations, documenting every failure and near-success in a notebook that had grown to twice its original size.
You'd watched him work on it in fragments, an hour here, a late night there, but mostly you'd been buried in your own deadlines. So when he walked into the living room holding a small, sealed vial of faintly shimmering liquid and announced, "It's done," you almost didn't believe him.
"It's done?"
"Done enough to submit. I'm not calling it a love potion. The official name is 'Synthetic Infatuation Cascade Inducer, Batch 7.' But it's stable. It works. Animal testing would be the next logical step, but since I don't have access to lab rats and I'm not about to test it on a human without ethics board approval, I'm handing it over to Professor Hayashi. She has contacts in the neuroscience department who might actually be able to do something with it."
He set the vial on the coffee table and dropped onto the futon beside you. He looked exhausted, purple shadows under his eyes, his hair a disaster even by his standards, but there was a quiet satisfaction in his expression that you'd only seen a handful of times before.
"I already started drafting the thesis," he added, almost as an afterthought. "For my doctorate program applications. It won't be relevant until I'm actually applying, but having preliminary research on the books won't hurt."
"Senku. You're not even a junior yet."
"And?"
You stared at him. Then you leaned over and kissed his cheek, quick and light. "You're so prepared, man I really need to step up my game."
"If you need any inspiration let me know, I'll be more than happy to help." You smiled smothering him in kisses for a good 3 minutes before you finally let him off, not that he minded in the first place.
…..
It was finally that day, drum roll please……
VALENTINES DAY!!
You woke up to a campus that had gone aggressively, nauseatingly pink.
Hearts dangled from every lamppost. Someone had draped a giant banner across the student center that read LOVE IS IN THE AIR in glittering red script. Couples were already out in full force—holding hands on the quad, exchanging stuffed animals outside the dining hall, kissing on benches like they were filming a montage for a rom-com. One guy was literally serenading his girlfriend with a guitar outside your building. At 8 a.m.
You pulled your hood up and walked faster.
It wasn't that you hated Valentine's Day. You'd had good ones before; cheesy high school dates, flowers delivered to your locker, the year your mom sent you a care package with heart-shaped cookies and a card that made you cry. But those memories felt distant now, buried under the last year's worth of situationships and disappointments. And this year, you had Senku. Real, official, boyfriend Senku. Which was great. It was more than great.
But you also knew exactly what kind of boyfriend he was.
He wasn't going to serenade you. He wasn't going to fill your room with balloons or write your name in rose petals across the quad. That wasn't him. It had never been him. And you'd made peace with that. You had.
At least, you thought you had.
The morning passed in unremarkable fashion. You had one class at ten, then another at noon. Senku was already gone by the time you woke up, a note on the counter in his terrible handwriting: Lab. Centrifuge broke. Don't wait up. You crumpled it and tossed it in the trash.
Your friends texted you photos of their Valentine's Day hauls. Yuzuriha sent a picture of a massive bouquet with the caption "from taiju. he picked them himself. they're all weeds." Kohaku sent a more elegant arrangement, pale pink roses in a ceramic vase she'd probably made herself. Even your old roommate, the one whose boyfriend had practically moved into your shoebox dorm, posted a photo of a candlelit dinner with the caption "so lucky 💕." And that was the night before valentines day.
You double-tapped it and kept scrolling.
By the time you met Senku at the lab that afternoon, you'd managed to lower your expectations to something approaching realistic. A box of chocolates, maybe. A card if he'd remembered. Nothing extravagant. Nothing performative. Just... something.
He was hunched over his laptop when you walked in, the centrifuge humming in the corner, his goggles pushed up into his hair. He looked up briefly. "Hey. The centrifuge is fixed. Mostly."
"Mostly?"
"There's a 12% chance it explodes. I'm willing to risk it."
You stood there for a moment, waiting. He didn't get up. Didn't pull anything out from behind his back. Didn't even say happy Valentine's Day.
"Anyway," he said, turning back to his screen, "I'm almost done here. Give me twenty minutes and we can walk back together."
"Sure," you said. "Take your time."
You sat on your usual stool and pulled out your phone. A new post from Kohaku: a video of Taiju trying to bake heart-shaped cookies and setting off the fire alarm. You smiled, but it didn't reach your chest.
How did I even start liking him? The thought surfaced before you could stop it, quiet and unwelcome. He's nothing like what I thought I wanted.
It wasn't cruel. It wasn't even untrue. Senku wasn't romantic. He wasn't demonstrative. He didn't bring you flowers or write you love notes or do any of the things you'd grown up dreaming about. He was blunt and sarcastic and sometimes so buried in his own head that you had to physically wave a hand in front of his face to get his attention.
But then you thought about the cold rice at midnight. The mushroom lamp on the breakfast table. The way he'd offered you a room in his apartment like it was obvious, like you belonged there. The way he'd asked to be your boyfriend instead of the other way around, because he'd never done anything the usual way in his life.
You pocketed your phone and waited.
Twenty minutes later, you were walking back to the apartment in silence. The sun had set, and the lampposts had switched on their twinkly heart-shaped lights. A couple passed you on the sidewalk, giggling, their arms linked. You looked away.
"You've been quiet," Senku said.
"Just tired."
"Hm."
He didn't push. You didn't elaborate. The silence stretched until you reached the apartment door.
He unlocked it and stepped aside. "After you."
You pushed the door open, and the first thing that hit you was the smell. Lavender. Stronger than usual, like someone had just spritzed every surface in the apartment. You frowned and took a step inside—
And stopped.
Rose petals. A trail of them, soft pink and cream, scattered across the floor in a winding path that led down the hallway toward your room. The lamp on the coffee table was lit, casting a warm glow over the petals, and the whole apartment smelled like lavender, something faintly sweet and something reallyyyy good.
"What—"
"Go," Senku said behind you, his voice quiet. "I'll be right here."
You followed the petals. Your heart was hammering now, confusion and disbelief tangling in your chest. The trail led past the bathroom, past his bedroom, and stopped at your door, which was slightly ajar.
You pushed it open.
On your bed was a plushie, the round, soft, ridiculously cute one you'd pointed out at the campus bookstore three weeks ago and immediately put back because it was too expensive. Beside it, a bouquet of flowers. Not red roses, you'd never been a red roses person, but a wild, colorful arrangement of daisies and sunflowers and lavender sprigs that looked like it had been put together by someone who actually paid attention. A box of your favorite chocolate. A DoorDash gift card with a sticky note on it that said $100 in Senku's terrible handwriting. A small velvet box.
And next to the box, a portable charger. Pink. Compact. Exactly the brand you'd been complaining about needing for the past month.
You picked it up, your throat tight. "You got me a portable charger."
"Your phone is always dying," Senku said from the doorway. "It's inefficient. Now you have no excuse to disappear for three hours."
You turned around. He was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed, his expression carefully neutral. But his ears were red. Bright, unmistakable red.
"Senku."
"Open the box."
You did. Inside, nestled on a small cushion, was a necklace. Delicate. Silver. A tiny pendant shaped like a star—or maybe a molecule; at this point it could have been either, with a small clear stone in the center that caught the lamplight.
"You did all this," you said, your voice coming out smaller than you meant. "The petals. The flowers. The plushie. You don't—this isn't—you don't do stuff like this."
"No," he agreed. "I don't."
"Then why—"
"Because you do." He pushed off the doorframe and took a step toward you. "You pretend you don't care about this stuff, but you do. I've watched you. You get this look on your face when you see couples doing the big gestures. Not jealous. Just... wistful. Like you're happy for them but you're also wondering why nobody's ever done it for you."
You opened your mouth. Closed it. He wasn't wrong.
"I don't care about grand gestures," he continued. "They're performative and inefficient and most people do them for the wrong reasons. But you're not most people. And if there's one thing I've learned from all those weeks in the lab, it's that love isn't about what makes sense to me. It's about showing up for the other person in the way they need to be shown up for." He adjusted his glasses. "You needed this. So I did it. Simple."
"It's not simple," you managed. "This is—Senku, this is the most romantic thing anyone's ever done for me."
"Then your previous partners set a depressingly low bar."
A laugh burst out of you, wet and unexpected. "You're unbelievable."
"I'm accurate." He took another step closer. "You want to know what I would have put on the card?"
You nodded, not trusting your voice.
He pushed off the doorframe and took a step toward you. Then another.
"You know the lab's been quieter lately. Since you stopped coming as much." He stopped in front of you, close enough that you could see the nervous bob of his throat. "I used to think I preferred the quiet. Fewer distractions. More work gets done. But now I'll be in there running a simulation or whatever, and I'll catch myself staring at the door. Waiting for you to walk in and ask a question you should already know the answer to."
A laugh hiccuped out of you, half sob. He reached up and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering.
"I'll be at my desk and I'll hear someone laugh down the hall and for a second I think it's you, and then it's not, and the whole room feels... I don't know. Dimmer. Less interesting." He tilted his head, studying your face. "You did that. You made my favorite place boring when you're not in it. That's annoying, by the way."
"Senku—"
He kissed you. Soft. Quick. Right between your eyebrows.
"Your voice is the loudest thing I've ever heard and I miss it when it's gone." He kissed your forehead. "You hum when you're concentrating. You don't even notice you're doing it." He kissed your temple. "You scrunch your nose up when you think something's stupid, which is often, because you have a low tolerance for nonsense." He kissed the corner of your mouth.
You were crying now. Not the ugly kind, just tears slipping down your cheeks while you stood there holding a portable charger and a velvet box and trying to remember how to breathe.
"You make everything louder," he said, quieter now. "Brighter. More chaotic. I didn't know I wanted that until you started showing up in my lab with your terrible handwriting and your coffee orders and your chin on my shoulder." He wiped a tear off your cheek with his thumb. "I don't know what I did before you moved in. I think I was just... working. Existing. It was fine. But it wasn't this."
He kissed your cheek. Your nose. The corner of your mouth again.
"You're the best variable of my life, that i hadn't accounted for," he murmured against your skin. "And I don't ever want to go back to a lab that doesn't have you in it."
The tears were still slipping down your cheeks, and you were about to pull him closer—actually pull him in, your hands already fisting the front of his shirt—when he suddenly pulled back.
"Hold on."
"What?"
"The timer." He was already stepping toward the door, adjusting his glasses with the hand that wasn't covered in your tears. "I put something in the oven before we left the lab. It should be done in about—"
The kitchen timer beeped, right on cue.
"You timed this," you said, your voice still thick.
"I time everything." He glanced back at you from the hallway, and his expression flickered—softer, just for a second. "Wash your face. It'll be ready when you come out."
You stood there for a moment, surrounded by rose petals and sunflowers and a plushie that was softer than anything you'd ever owned, and you pressed your fingers to your lips where his had just been. Then you did what he said. Washed your face. Took a breath. Walked out.
The apartment smelled incredible. Savory and warm and familiar—your favorite. You didn't even have to ask what it was. You just stood in the doorway of the kitchen and watched him plate it with the same concentration he usually reserved for pipetting chemicals.
"You made my favorite."
"I noticed you hadn't had it in a while. The ingredients weren't hard to source." He handed you a plate without looking at you. "Go sit. Pick a movie. Something that won't annoy me."
"You're so bossy."
"You're so slow."
You grabbed the plate and settled onto the futon, pulling the lavender throw blanket over your lap. He sat beside you—closer than usual, his knee pressed against yours—and you put on something light, something you'd seen before, something that didn't require much brainpower. The food was perfect. Exactly what you needed. You ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes, the movie flickering in the background.
Then you set your fork down.
"Hey."
"Hm."
"I was really sad today."
He didn't say anything, but his hand found yours under the blanket.
"Not because of you," you continued. "Well. Kind of. I just—I woke up and everyone was posting their Valentine's stuff and I thought... I knew you weren't going to do any of that. And I'd made peace with it. I thought I'd made peace with it. But then I saw you in the lab and you didn't even say happy Valentine's Day and I just..." You shook your head. "I had this moment where I forgot why I liked you. Like I actually forgot. I was walking home thinking, 'He's nothing like what I wanted.'"
Senku was quiet. His thumb traced your knuckle.
"And then I walked in and it smelled like lavender and there were rose petals on the floor and you'd gotten me the stupid plushie I wouldn't shut up about three weeks ago." Your voice cracked. "You remembered. All of it. Even the portable charger. Even the DoorDash gift card because you know I hate cooking when I'm stressed. You remembered everything."
"I pay attention," he said quietly. "It's not that hard."
"It is, though. For most people. My ex didn't even remember my coffee order, and I dated him for four months. You remembered my Sprite. You remembered my favorite food. You remembered the plushie." You turned to look at him, and your eyes were wet again, but this time it didn't feel heavy. It felt light. "You saw me. All day, I felt invisible, and you saw me."
He didn't answer with words. Just reached up and tucked that same strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering on your jaw.
"Thank you," you whispered. "For seeing me."
"I always see you." His voice was barely above a murmur. "I can't not see you. You're the most noticeable variable in any room."
You laughed—wet and bright and full—and leaned forward until your forehead touched his.
"I love you," you said.
His breath caught. Just a little. Just enough for you to notice.
"I know," he said. And then, softer: "I love you too. Obviously."
💚 💚 💚 💚 💚 💚 S M U T 💚 💚 💚 💚 💚 💚 (I listen to west coast by lana on repeat to write this)
And he kissed you, slow and sure, his hand sliding into your hair, your fingers curling into the soft cotton of his shirt, the movie forgotten, the plates half-empty, the apartment warm and quiet and full of lavender.
You pulled back just enough to catch your breath to look at the needy, furrowed expression growing on his face.
He let out a small sigh as you climbed on to his lap, one of his hands settled on your waist as he pulled you in again. His other hand traveled slowly up your shirt…
the pad of his fingers brushing so softly, tracing up your spine. And his hand settled on your nape pushing your face closer to his.
Your mouth watered you could feel your eyebrows furrowing with need, God, how beautiful this man was…
His head was tipped back against the futon cushion, eyes half-closed, lips parted as he dragged air into his lungs. The line of his throat was exposed—pale, elegant, a little damp with the sheen of effort. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed.
you shifted on his rolling your hips back as you lowered your lips to his throat. When you leaned in and brushed your lips just beneath it, he inhaled sharply, and you felt the vibration of the sound travel through his skin to your mouth. You kissed it again, softer, and this time he made a noise low in his chest, half surprise, half something else entirely, and his Adam’s apple jumped under your lips like it was trying to escape your attention. You smiled against his throat.
"Are you nervous?"
You nudged his chin up with your knuckle, and he let you—surrendered, actually, with an exhale that was almost a sigh. The lamplight spilled down the newly exposed expanse of his throat: smooth skin, the subtle ridges of his trachea, the dip right above his collarbone that looked like it was made for your mouth.
He tried to blow his nervousness off with a easy chuckle, but it came out raspy, barely even considered a laugh as it settled into a slight groan when you placed wet kisses from his lips…
to his jaw….
his adams apple…
His grip on your nape tighten for a nanosecond when you kisses his ear. You titled your head just enough to watch his lips part, his adams apple bob, and his eyes to flutter at the feeling.
Your name barely sounded out of his lips. "Yes? Senku." You whispered so soft.
A groan ripped from his throat when you sucked on the skin just behind his ear. "StasticAClly speaking," his voice cracked.
"Senku don't start you bullshit." You said not-so-softly. Your hips rolled against his. "I don't get turned on by talking stats." You explained.
You weren't even gonna let him finish explaining, so he'd just have to show you without the explanation.
His hand slipped down from your neck and out of your shirt. He nudged you off of him.
Had you ruined the moment?
Senku stood up grabbing your wrist. You were yanked up from the couch, to your surpise, and led to his room.
As soon as he cross the threshold you were yanked into the room with strength you didn't know he had. The door slammed close as your back hit the door.
His teeth hitting yours as he smashed his lips against yours. Your hands pinned down on either sides of your head.
Your legs pressed into his leg that separated yours.
His hands dragged down your wrists, tracing your curved until his hands looped under your shirt and pull it right off of you.
His knee shifted higher as his hand came up pulling at your hips by your belt loop. A soft sound falls from your lips as his knee rubs against your aching heat, while he unbuttons your pants and move to pull them down revealing a light pink lacey set.
Senku noticed how you tried to hide away, averting your eyes subtly trying to hide yourself from his gaze.
The pad of his lower thumb brushed against your bottom lip, your jaw going slack in his hold. He tilts your head up, it felt as if his crimson eyes were devouring you.
He brought his mouth down to yours moving his hand to cup your jaw as he kissed you, slow, deep. His tongue pushing to brush against the roof of your mouth. Your eyes fluttered shut as your fingers combed through his hair scratching at his scalp trying to pull him impossibly closer.
"Open." He kissed, "your eyes." He kissed through. And you opened your eyes letting his gaze drink in your every reaction.
The kiss parted with a string of saliva And he kissed wet slow kisses on your neck allowing your eyes to flutter closed and your head to fall slack against the door with a soft thud.
Your name rumbled low from his lips, "Tell me… What are you thinking about right now."
What were you thinking about?
His tongue pressed against your ear, that tingle in your throat finally eased with a soft moan. "I'll stop if you don't say anything." Your nails dig into his scalp as if to keep him there.
He rubbed slow circles on your hips. "N— othin'," the word barely comes out.
"Are you sure?" He asked again his lips stopped, they hovered over your kiss. His hand ran over your stomach your body flinching in as he skips your pussy and goes for your clenched thigh, prying his two fingers between to go up… and up to press while he traced his thumb up your pink centre.
You push your hips against his hand. He watches you, he could tell by the whine in your voice, the desperation in your expression, you were close.
Senku pulled his hand away and you opened your eyes, only for him to cover them. "Don't open them."
It was dark, the heat of him was inches away, and your whole body was straining toward it like a plant toward light. Your lips parted. "Your breathing's changed," he murmured. "Deeper. Slower. Your lips just parted. Are you imagining something?"
"Yes."
"Tell me." His voice was so soft.
You swallowed as your mind wandered off or maybe it didn't. you couldn't tell if it was him actually touching or if your mind was playing trick on you.
"Described it." His voice guided you. "More detail. What are my hands doing? Where? What does it feel like?" — until you were trembling, until the fantasy was so vivid behind your closed eyelids that you could almost feel his fingers on your skin even though he still hadn't moved.
"Good," he breathed. "Now open your eyes." You did. He was right there, inches away, his pupils blown wide, his expression caught between clinical fascination and something much hungrier.
"You're so worked up right now that a single touch might send you over the edge," he said, his voice rougher than before. "I could kiss your neck and you'd probably—" His thumb brushed the hollow of your throat, feather-light, and your whole body shuddered. "—yeah…. Like that…That's exactly the response I was looking for."
He leaned closer, his lips brushing your ear. Your eyes rolling shut. You felt his head dip as he hooked his arm under one of your legs and threw it over his shoulder. He hooked two fingers on the side of your panties and tugged them to the side.
His adams apple bobbed again, his mouth watering. He pressed a wet kiss to your clit, then another, longer the second time. Your lips parted curses falling from your lips when his tongue lapped and pressed between your folds right underneath you clit.
You pushed your hips into his face and his face deeper into your hips "Fu—fuck." You whimper grinding down on his face. You grabbed the door handle so tight your knuckles turned a lighter shade as you stared down at him.
His face between your legs, smushed against the fat of your thighs, the blush on his cheeks and his hurried gaze.
You threw your head back getting louder, pitchier. buckling and rolling your hips.
Almost, you were almost there…
His cheeks hallowed as he sucked on your clit prodding at the bud it felt so good there was a tinge of pain. He pushed your hips more into his face as he slides down to your hole. His tongue lapped up your slick, his adams-apple bobbing up and down with every slurp.
his tongue felt so good but it wasn't enough it only made you more needy. You needed something bigger, thicker. Fuck you were past the point of desperation.
You pulled him up and back him up on to the bed as you tugged as his belt then his pants buckle and zipper. He raised his hips, making it easier to pull him from his restraints.
You would take a proper look at his dick later. You climb on his lap, reaching behind you to grab his dick and line him up with your hole and your sat down.
Your eyes rolled close. You were seeing flashes of white, gasping for air. Senku let out a groan broken into a whimpering moan at the end his head fell back against the plush of the bed.
You placed your hands on his chest, moving your hips up and down. His hands came to your hips to pull you back down to meet his hips thrusting up.
Your thighs were starting to burn but you were getting closer the more his tip prodded at your spot. "Sen—" You couldn't even finish saying his name.
The coils in your lower stomach were tightening and tightening. Senku's dick throbbed and twitched in you. He was close, his pace got sloppy more desperate just as your did.
Senku clenched his teeth throwing his head back a loud groan cutting through the air as you squeezed around him trembling coming undone. He road you through your high and quickly pull out cumming all over his stomach.
You fell forward a wave of exhaustion coming over you.
That was the best. You thought, it was the best sex you ever had.
You let out a sigh as he kissed your forehead. For a moment you both laid there in silence threatening to fall asleep just like that.
"Come on, You have to use the bathroom and take a shower." He rasped
He was right but man you were exhausted, and your legs felt weak.
You both showered together and… Somehow ended up going another round in the process and when you finally got out. Senku had to haul you to your room and help you put on some pajamas and he did the same, crawling into the bed right next to you.
THE END FOR NOW MAYBE
Chat how did I do??? genuinely, it's been so long since I tried to write sex, the shame and embarrassment were almost too much but i pushed though can gave you as much as I could with no sleep and about 2 hours of going through: how to write smut/sex for dummies, sex dictionary and a few other things. I would love pointers if you're open to giving them. I have to say although its not a long drawn out slow burn college au with academic rivals to lovers, sharing a dorm room cause iit was included in their scholarship. I still like it... It's sersously better than nothing... Finding senku college au's is so hard for me usually they're all cannon and long extremely old but if i do find a good one the author stops upload (save me from this senku drought)
Thanks for reading my banter! Have a Bless better day lovlies!
note: Academic rival Senkuu save me from this writing block!!! Academic rival Senkuu you're my only hope! I hope I didn't write him too ooc.
“Sir, is it true that biologically, our brain processes hate and love in a very similar way?”
Neurology and the study of the brain was always your favorite topic in biology class. And you weren’t afraid to make it clear to everybody else by asking an ungodly amount of questions. Was it obnoxious? Absolutely. Did you care? Not one bit.
But your classmates were used to it now. Yeah, you might have been annoyingly nerdy, but you made up for it by always helping the struggling students, and asking the teachers for favors for the whole class because you knew they were less strict with you. It was an unsaid pact of mutual respect respected by the whole class. Almost the whole class.
“That’s a good ques-…” the teacher began his explanation before he was interrupted.
“I think what you mean is passion. Both feelings can be described by extreme passion.
That being said. Love and hate are two different things based on what you choose to define them as. Familial love? National love? Self love? Sexual love? All have their own separate words that should be used instead. Many of which in extreme forms become unreasoned and ambivalent like word passion.”
You sighed. The overglorified headache, you had been cursing for years, decided to bless your day with his condescending once again. All hail the uncrowned king of ‘erm, actually…’! All unite under the flag of ‘no, because I read…’!
“Thank you Mr. Ishigami, but I believe I’m perfectly qualified to answer y/n’s question.” the teacher laughed. Of course he just laughed. What else could’ve he done when the guy was notorious for bringing back a prize from almost every competition he ever attended. He was untouchable by the teachers.
Ishigami Senku. The only guy in the class who refused to respect the unsaid pact. The guy who singlehandedly turned your teenage dream into a never ending, confidence destroying competition. The guy who always seemed to be just one step above you.
He was popular as well. While you were loved for your generosity and brains, he was surrounded by people swooning over him. I mean the guy was seriously hot. Not even you could deny it. The little smirk he did when he thought he won, the glint in his eyes looking down at you when you said something incorrect. Although they made your blood boil and your stomach shrink, there was something else to them too…
You often fantasied about finally defeating him. Where instead of his usual condescending attitude, you’d be the one looking down at him. You could almost see his beautiful red eyes looking up at you, eyebrows curling up pathetically, gaze begging for something, eyelashes stuttering as you run your fighters through his hair…
HUH?!
Where in the sweet and sour fuck did that came from?
“…I hope that answered your question.”
Oh shit you forgot to pay attention. Now you’d have to search it up once you get home. See, he was also ruining your ability to focus! He was clearly the worst! You knew he didn’t deserve the amount of time you spent thinking about him. So why? Why couldn’t you get him off your mind? Why was the stupid, childish competition between the two of you so important? Why were you always peeking over his shoulder to see if he got a better percentage than you?
You cared so much about his opinion you often overworked yourself. ‘I want to defeat him’ you told yourself but maybe in reality your goal was to impress him. Whatever the feeling was, staying in the library until closing time wasn’t an unusual act.
A warm tear ran down your face. You had been sitting in the library for hours working on an assignment you forgot about. You spent the whole afternoon studying for other tests until you suddenly remembered the assignment slipped your mind. A moment of panic washed over you but you quickly calmed yourself after realising it would take an hour max. Except it didn’t because your stupid computer broke and now it was slower than the principle’s speech on the last day of school.
You only had two hours before midnight and you were completely exhausted. You couldn’t handle the frustration and fear of failing, and your vision started to blur as your eyes filled with tears. You were so done with this. You wanted nothing more than to go home and sleep. But you couldn’T stop thinking about how Senku would react when he heard you failed. Would he laugh? Would he rub it in your face? Or would he just shrug and find a new rival? A smarter one? No you couldn’t let that happen!
You stared at your disgustingly slow computer’s loading symbol while wiping away the tears that just kept coming. Why wasn’t it WORKING?!
“Y/n? Don’t tell me you’re still working on that stupind assignment? I’ve already-… Are you crying?”
No no no no no no no!!! What was he doing there? Why did he have to come in right now? Why did he have to see the absolute mess you were?
“I’m not crying, it’s nothing.”
You did your best to hide the knot in your throat as you were speaking but it was painfully obvious. You didn’t dare look at him.
“If you think I’m going to leave you here to cry alone you’re wrong. So you either make it easier for the both of us and just tell me what’s going on or I’ll just stay here, annoying you.” You could hear his voice move closer until he was squatting next to your seat to catch your gaze. You were too tired to resist.
“I’m just frustrated. I want to sleep but I can’t finish my assignment because my dumbass computer refuses to cooperate on any level. Look, switching between open pages takes a minimum of 10 seconds. I would have already finished if it wasn’t for this shittery!” you burrowed your head in your hands and let out a shaky sigh. Why were you opening up to him of all people? All your remaining hope for comfort from him (which let’s be honest wasn’t much) was obliterated when you heard the sound of his chuckle.
“Oh, just a bug?” he snickered, “I thought it was something serious. Like someone was bullying you or a teacher was giving you a hard time.”
“Someone IS bullying me.” your gaze was ice cold but he just chuckled again.
“Yeah but I’m the only one allowed to do that. Now go wash your face, you look like a mess!” he smiled and flicked your forehead.
You grumbled but complied. Thankfully you had some make up remover in your bag so you had no trouble cleaning the smudged mascara off your face. Although your eyes were still noticeably red, you looked much more presentable. And you managed to calm down as well.
That was until you returned to your table and found Senku typing away on your computer.
“What are you doing?!”
“Calm down, I’m just looking through some programs running in the background. I’m trying to figure out what was slowing your computer down so much. Also I deleted some unimportant files that were also slowing it down. You’re welcome.”
“Huh?! Do not do that please? This is my computer and I am perfectly capable of doing that myself!”
“Relax, I’m not going through your personal stuff. Your love letters and fanfictions are safe.”
This was starting to get ridiculous. He had to be teasing you, there was no way he didn’t see a problem with going through your stuff.
“I have nothing like that on my computer!”
“Wouldn’t know. ‘Cause you know, I’M NOT LOOKING! But check this out, it’s already much faster.”
You stepped behind him and Senku could feel your hair tickling the side of his face as you looked over his shoulder. A shiver ran up his spine. To your surprise he was right, and your old laptop was working like a dream. You were just about to thank him when, with a few swift clicks, he turned it off.
“What are you doing?!”
Don’t worry, I saved your work.”
“That’s not the problem!” you scolded “Why did you turn it off? I was still working!”
“No the fuck you weren’t, it’s 10pm and we have school tomorrow. Go home and sleep!”
“Oh you’d love that, wouldn’t you. Watching me fail.”
You knew this was unfair to him, he was just trying to help in whatever fucked up way he could. But admitting you’re not resilient enough, you couldn’t finish it like he did was much harder than just being a prick.
He shut you up by stepping closer and holding your cheeks in his palm. His eyes kept contact with yours as you both flustered slightly. This was the closest he had ever been to you.
“Y/n. Nobody gives a shit. Go home and sleep, ok?”
The next day you were just as cranky. You were still tired and you couldn’t believe you let yourself be talked into quitting. That wasn’t something you do. It felt… like a betrayal. Like you took something you believed was a foundational part of your identity and just threw it out the window for it to perfectly fall on your ego and bruise it like it has never been bruised before.
Thankfully your teacher didn’t call you out in front of the entire class and Senku didn’t tease you about it either. So a naive part of you actually thought you could get away with it.
“Y/n! Ishigami! Can I talk to you for a moment?” the teacher called after you as you were leaving the classroom.
“It came to my attention that both of you failed to submit your assignments. Is there something going on I should know about?”
Wait a minute? Both of you? You looked at Senku who avoided your gaze. There was no way in hell he couldn’t finish his, in time. Did he seriously not hand it in just so you wouldn’t worry about your silly rivalry?
“We’re sorry Miss! We had a lot of tests this week and we didn’t have much time. It won’t happen again.” he explained.
You were speechless. Where did the ‘we’ come from? Why was he making excuses for you too? Your breath hitched as you got a glimpse of the slight smirk on his lips.
“Fine, because I know how active you guys are in my class, I'll make an exception. Upload your work until midnight okay? Oh and don’t tell the other students!”
You both expressed your gratitude in sync before scurrying out of the classroom. The walk to the entrance was awkward. His expression mirrored something akin to boredom which drove you crazy as you were still trying to figure out why he did that.
“Thank you…” you mumbled under your breath.
“What are you thanking me for?” he scoffed. “Do you really think I didn’t upload my work to help you save face? Pfff get over yourself!”
“No, idiot! I was thanking you for fixing my laptop yesterday!” nice save. “Wait a minute! Did you really not upload your work, to help me save face?” you laughed. Sure it was mean but one doesn’t just pass up a chance to tease the airtight Senku Ishigami.
“Are you dumb? I literally just said I didn’t do that!” he protested but the slight flush of his cheeks betrayed him. The slight flush of his cheeks from which you couldn’t tear your eyes away. The slight flush of cheeks which awakened a feeling in your stomach you were not quite ready to face yet.
You looked away and mumbled a quick “Whatever thanks i guess” before flying out the entrance and hurrying home.
It was no secret Senku was jealous of you. Not only were you irritatingly smart, generous, and popular because of the first two, but you also happened to be exactly his type. And you had the audacity to hate his guts. Seriously, how dare you?
But he couldn’t lie in some sadistic way he couldn’t get enough of your hate. The goal of defeating you gave him motivation to constantly improve and learn. And the sight of your pout when he got a higher percentage or a teacher praised him instead of you, never failed to draw the most annoyingly confident shit-eating smirk on his face.
So yeah, he wasn’t surprised you hated him and to be honest he hated you for being so perfect as well. And while the rivalry between you two pushed both of you to improve it also often resulted in harmful effects to your lives. Constant anxiety, self-doubt and most importantly a dreadful sleep-schedule.
After a long night spent studying, Senku could not concentrate to save his life. He usually liked that class and the teacher but he was constantly drifting off. He realised he missed something. Something elementary. Something obvious to anyone not half asleep. However the teacher’s-pet instincts kicked in and before he realised he asked a headache-inducingly stupid question.
“Ishigami for the love of god, it’s one thing to almost sleep in my class but you seriously interrupted to ask something this evident? It is so unlike you!”
What? Was he the… interruption? The distraction?
“I mean seriously, what were you doing yesterday that was so much more important than sleep?” he tried to sink into the ground as the teacher flew off the handle for absolutely no reason. “I swear you young people and your phone addict-…”
“Excuse me, Miss?” a hand rose in the air, “I didn’t quite understand what you were saying either. Could you explain it one more time?”
The class froze. It was clear to everyone that a question like this was beneath you both. They could tell Senku was sleep deprived, but you? Or were you lying to save his reputation? But why would you do that to your enemy?
“You too, y/n? Maybe I rushed over the topic too fast. I’ll explain it one more time but pay attention!”
Senku’s jaw was metaphorically on the floor. He was staring at you but he could tell you were lying. You completely understood everything, like you always did. You noticed him staring and with a quick shake of your head you scribbled something down on a piece of paper and threw it on his desk.
“Dude, I got you another explanation and you’re still not paying attention? You’re hopeless! >:c”
He couldn’t help but let out a quiet chuckle at the sight of your angry note.
The next months followed the same bizarre pattern. You and Senku fought endlessly for recognition, your brutal rivalry only intermitted to give a helping hand to one another once in a while. Yet you grew closer day by day until Senku became an integral part of your life.
“No, you’re not listening to me! “ you were walking out of the library side-by-side after a joke of a study session. “ ‘If you eat a lot of chocolate, you’ll get sick.’ This sentence is a first conditional because it’s likely to happen!”
It’s safe to say you were at your wit’s end. This argument was so dumb you couldn’t imagine how he managed to piss you off so bad, but it was in his nature. With him, you could turn the slightest disagreements into a full blown fight.
“I don’t know what you fatass, do in your free time but I’ve never eaten enough chocolate to actually feel sick. ‘If you ate a lot of chocolate you’d get sick.’ makes a lot more sense!”
“Who are you calling a fatass? Also not everything is about you! There are plenty of children who would eat chocolate until they throw up, if they could. We can assume a parent is saying this to their kid.”
“No.”
“No?
“No.”
“The fuck you mean no?”
“My version still makes more sense.”
You were about to fly, with a gorgeous fucking pirouette, off the handle when you noticed the slight smirk on the edge of his lip.
“You’re fucking with me.”
He couldn’t hide his smile anymore. The sight of his shit-eating grin made your blood boil and the only thought left in your brain was to wipe that fucker off his face. Looking back you had absolutely no idea what in tarnation compelled you to grab the collar of his shirt and shove him up against the wall behind him, but the second you saw the look on his face and felt his breath stutter, you knew you couldn’t stop.
Your mouth crashed into his, fingers aggressively tugging at his collar. His wide eyes and muffled yelp betrayed his surprise but it didn’t take him much time to adjust. The kiss was fast, rough and desperate. His hand was grabbing your waist, ass, thighs, pulling you closer like a drowning man fighting for fresh air, while your hand found its way into his hair, tugging on it, making him release ridiculous noises, to which you reacted with grinning into the kiss. Your other hand was still working on keeping him pinned against the cold, rough wall, refusing to give him control he was fighting so hard for.
The knowledge that you managed to reduce him into a flustered, desperate mess was driving him crazy. But you filled every one of his senses, he couldn’t concentrate on anything but the smell of your hair, the feel of your skin on his and the taste of your lips.
The frustration, which had been dwelling in both of you for quite a while, only made the kiss more passionate. Hate and love mixed in your movements, and all sober thoughts were thrown out the window. This was dumb, you both knew it, yet for some reason it felt so right!
When you finally pulled back, both of you just stared at each other completely dumbfounded, chests rising and falling together as you were trying to catch your breath. It didn’t take long, however, for Senku’s signature smirk to reappear. But it was different this time, his eyes stayed soft when looking at you. With a sigh you rested your forehead on his shoulder to cover your flushed face.
“Could you, just once in your life, keep your mouth shut?” you muttered.
“Don’t worry!” he chuckled, “I won’t tease you for this.”
It would be an exaggeration to say your relationship really changed after this. Your rivalry continued just as mercilessly as before, you’d still correct each other every given chance and you’d still rush to see who’s got a better percentage. And if one of you walked in with an obnoxious, deep-purple hickey one day, no one dared to question it.
warnings/tags: angst with a happy ending, fem!reader, ooc, miscommunication, overthinking, emotional distance, psychoanalysis as a defense mechanism, pre-war tension (specifically the Tsukasa War arc), temporary teparation, holding hands while crying by a river
character(s): senku ishigami
>og ask<
You didn’t need a microscope to read Senku Ishigami. You just needed to pay attention.
While the rest of the school saw a manic, abrasive science freak who spoke in rapid-fire percentages, you saw the tiny shifts. You noticed the way his left shoulder dropped by a fraction of an inch when a chemical reaction didn’t yield the expected rate. You noticed how he only ever drank his canned coffee at room temperature because hot liquids slowed down his talking speed.
And, most importantly, you noticed the exact micro-second his voice dropped from its usual edge to a flatter, genuine tone.
"You're running on three hours of sleep," you said, sliding into the chair across from his lab desk. You didn't look up from your book, but your hand precisely reached out and intercepted a glass beaker he was about to blindly knock over with his elbow.
Senku didn't look up from his notes, his pen scratching furiously. "Ten billion percent incorrect. It’s three hours and fourteen minutes. And your point is?"
"The coffee stain on your cuff," you remarked, turning a page. "You only spill when your spatial awareness degrades from sleep deprivation. Also, you said 'Yo' today instead of your usual 'Oi.' Your vocal cords are strained from yelling at Taiju, meaning you're trying to overcompensate for low energy."
The scratching pen stopped. Senku finally looked up, his crimson eyes narrowing slightly. It was a look you loved—the look he gave a particularly stubborn physics problem.
"You're a creepy baseline of observant, you know that?" he said, though there was a twitch of a smirk on his lips.
"I just pay attention to my favorite scientist," you said easily, leaning your chin on your hand. You never hid your feelings in metaphors. You liked him. You had liked him for a year. You told him every Tuesday. "And because I like you, I brought the snacks you prefer when your brain is fried. They're in your bag. I put them there before you noticed."
Senku blinked, checking his side bag. Sure enough, a pack of his preferred energy jellies was sitting right on top. He let out a sharp, amused huff.
"Acts of service," he muttered, tearing one open. "How logical of you. Saves me the time of going to the vending machine."
"I aim to please," you smiled, leaning back. "Though, a 'thank you, you're the light of my life' wouldn't hurt. Words of affection, Senku. It’s a recognized love language."
"A pseudo-scientific concept," he countered immediately, though he didn't stop eating the snack you'd provided. "Feelings are just chemical surges in the brain. Asking for verbal confirmation is redundant when the data—your presence here wasting your study period—already proves the thesis."
"Maybe," you chuckled, your voice softening as you watched him work. "But hearing the data out loud makes the brain release a little extra dopamine. I like hearing how you feel about me. Even if it's just a percentage."
Senku paused, his eyes darting to your face, analyzing the open, unabashed affection written there. He wasn't a guy made for grand romantic gestures, but he moved his laptop exactly three inches to the left—perfectly clearing the space on the desk so you could rest your arms comfortably.
"Quality time," he grunted, looking back at his screen. "Shut up and sit there then. I have a rocket report to finish."
You smiled, settling in. You knew exactly what that space meant.
Three thousand seven hundred years didn't change his core, but it changed the stakes.
In the Kingdom of Science, Senku was a visionary in a dirt-stained tunic. He carried the weight of human civilization on his shoulders, scheming against Tsukasa, managing a village of primitives, and inventing the modern world from scratch.
And you were right there beside him, the silent grease in the gears.
You were the one who noticed Gen Asagiri’s fingers twitching in a specific pattern when he was lying to the villagers, allowing you to smoothly step in and redirect the conversation before a riot started.
You were the one who saw the slight limp in Chrome’s stride after a long foraging trip and secretly left a poultice in his shed.
You cleaned the charcoal dust off the shared blueprints before the humidity could smear the lines into illegibility.
You read everyone perfectly. Except, lately, the one person who mattered most.
"Senku," you said, stepping into the lab hut late one evening. The war with Tsukasa was looming, and the tension in the village was a physical weight. "The calcium carbonate yields are fluctuating. You're adjusting the formula manually every batch, which means you're trying to hide a deficit from the others."
Senku didn't look up from his earthenware vessels. "It's a minor variable. Nothing the village needs to panic over. I’ve got it handled."
"You've got everything handled," you said, your voice dropping, losing its usual playful edge. "But you haven't looked at me in three days. And when you speak to me, your pitch rises by about five hertz. You do that when you're trying to sound dismissive." You didn't want to sound needy but the looming threat of the Empire of Might has a way of making your heart ache with doubt. You hated this feeling. Abhored it, if you were being honest.
Senku stopped stirring. His posture went rigid. "We're preparing for a war that determines the fate of humanity. I don't have the bandwidth to calibrate my vocal cords for your psychological check-ins."
The bluntness hit differently in the dark of the Stone World. It didn't feel like a playful remark anymore; it felt like a wall slowly closing in on your fragile self.
"I’m not checking in on a test subject, Senku. I’m checking in on you," you said, stepping closer. "I need you to talk to me. Truly, truly talk to me. Not just give me orders or logic puzzles. I need a word, Senku. Just one genuine sentence to know we're still... us. Before everything goes to hell."
Senku turned around slowly. His eyes weren't filled with the warm curiosity of the old school lab. They were cold, analytical, and utterly exhausted.
"That's exactly the problem," Senku said, his voice dropping into a dangerously quiet register. "You're constantly analyzing the data. You're looking at my posture, my voice, my habits. It's like you're trying to build a psychological profile to predict my next move like I'm a puzzle to be solved."
You flinched. "I do it because I care about you-"
"No, you do it because you want a specific emotional output," Senku interrupted, his words sharp as obsidian. "You want 'words of affection.' You want reassurance. But right now, human civilization is resting on a knife's edge. I can't afford to be psychoanalyzed every time I breathe heavily or turn my head. I need a partner in the lab, not a therapist who's overthinking every single variable because she's insecure."
The word insecure hung in the humid air of the hut like a foul gas.
Your throat tightened. Your gift—the thing that allowed you to understand everyone, to protect everyone—was being framed as a suffocating leash. You looked at him, searching his face, but for the first time in your life, your brain short-circuited. You overanalyzed the coldness in his eyes, multiplying it by the stress of the impending war, and came to a devastating conclusion: He thinks I'm a liability. He's pulling back because I'm a distraction.
"I see," you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. "The data is clear then."
Without another word, you turned and walked out of the hut, leaving him alone in the dim glow of the firelight.
For the next two days, you were a ghost.
You still did your job perfectly. The calcium carbonate was sorted. You anticipated every need of the Kingdom of Science before they even knew they had it. But you didn't step foot in Senku's personal space. When you handed him tools, your fingers never brushed his. When he spoke, you answered with crisp, professional efficiency.
You shut off the valve. No blunt declarations of love. No teasing observations. After all, you didn't want to be insecure.
Senku kept working, but the silence in the lab was deafening. To a man who lived by empirical evidence, the sudden absence of a constant variable was glaringly obvious. The desk wasn't cleared. The countless amounts of containers in the lab weren't arranged. When he reached for the small cup of water, it wasn't there.
Because you weren't there.
On the third night, as the rest of the village slept, Senku found you down by the river, meticulously washing out glass vials.
"The manganese solution is ready for tomorrow," you said smoothly, not looking up as his footsteps approached. "You don't need to check. I measured it to the milligram."
"I don't care about the manganese," Senku said.
You paused, your hands hovering over the water.
"Your breathing is shallow," Senku continued, walking up to the edge of the riverbank. "Your shoulders are locked at a twelve-degree elevation, which means you're in a defensive posture. And you haven't looked at my face in seventy-two hours. It’s an illogical waste of energy to avoid eye contact with a coworker."
A bitter laugh escaped your lips. "Are you psychoanalyzing me now, Senku? I thought that was a suffocating waste of time."
"It is," Senku said, stepping down into the shallow water, ruining his shoes without a care. He stopped right in front of you. "But apparently, it's the only language you're willing to listen to right now."
You finally looked up, your eyes bright with unshed, angry tears. "I was trying to give you space! You said I was too deep, that I was overthinking, that I was making you feel like a puzzle. So I stopped. I stopped analyzing you. I stopped pushing my feelings on you."
"And your conclusion was that I wanted you to disappear?" Senku asked, his voice losing its harsh edge, replaced by a rare, raw frustration. "Ten billion percent incorrect. Your deduction skills completely failed you, idiot."
You blinked, startled by the sudden shift.
Senku groaned, running a hand through his gravity-defying hair. He looked completely out of his comfort zone, pulling at the collar of his tunic.
"Look," he muttered, his eyes darting to the side before forcing themselves back to yours. "I'm a man of science. I don't do the... emotional monologue thing. It's inefficient. But you want words? Fine. Here's the raw data."
He took a step closer, closing the distance between you until you could smell the faint scent of sulfur and woodsmoke on him.
"I didn't pull back because you're a distraction," he said, each word deliberate, heavy, and completely unvarnished. "I pulled back because you're the only thing in this world that isn't a calculation to me. When Tsukasa threatens the village, I calculate a countermeasure. When a chemical fails, I calculate a new formula. But when you look at me and tell me you love me—or when you notice I'm tired before I even realize it—there is no formula for that. It scares the hell out of me because I can't control it. And if I lose this war... I lose you. And that is a variable I cannot mathematically survive."
You stared at him, your breath hitching in your throat. Your hyper-observant brain was screaming, analyzing every micro-expression. The slight tremor in his jaw. The dilation of his pupils. The utter, terrifying honesty in his voice.
He wasn't rejecting you. He was terrified of losing you.
"Senku..." you breathed.
"You're disgustingly good at reading people," he muttered, looking away, a faint but undeniable crimson flush creeping up his neck. "So read this: I need you here. Just as you are. Blunt, annoying-" you almost scoffed at that—but you'll let it slide, "-and overly observant. The lab is completely inefficient without you. And... I like the dopamine rush when you talk to me."
A tear finally spilled over your eyelashes, but a wide, brilliant smile broke across your face. It was the most un-Senku-like confession possible, which made it the most perfect thing you had ever heard.
You stood up, wiping your hands on your tunic, and took the final step forward, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck. He stiffened for a fraction of a second, completely unaccustomed to the sudden physical contact, before his hands found your waist, gripping you with a quiet, desperate intensity.
"Quality time," you whispered into his shoulder. "And those were very good words of affection, chief scientist."
"Shut up," Senku mumbled, though he didn't pull away. He rested his chin on the top of your head, his heart beating a steady, rapid rhythm against your chest. "We have a war to win tomorrow. Don't make me waste any more time explaining the obvious."
"Understood," you smiled, closing your eyes and listening to the perfect, uncomplicated science of his heartbeat.
SUMMARY: College AU! Byakuya buys an embarrassing gift for Senku in the hope that he'll finally form a friendship with their neighbor: a two-person bike.
WORD COUNT: 2,917
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Read on Ao3 here! This was originally written for a friend, and it's been sitting in my Google Drive ever since. I want to slowly dip my toes back into this fandom, though, so I thought I'd post it!
He can’t be serious. Even for him, this seems like a little too much. Senku stared blankly at Byakuya. “You’re kidding, right?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at his father as he narrowed his ruby eyes. “You didn’t buy this for me.”
“What? Of course I did!” Byakuya smiled widely, completely indifferent to his son’s cold tone as he circled around the bike. “That girl invites you to ride a bike with her to campus every day, so I thought it would be better if you two just rode one bike! Maybe now you won’t turn her down!”
Senku sighed. Byakuya, of course, was referring to their new neighbor who recently moved in. The family that moved in had one daughter his age who happened to be going to the same campus in the city that he was. “I have a bike already. Why did you buy this?”
The bike in question looked like a tourist bike he’d seen in the city before. It had one set of pedals but two seats - a regular bike seat for whoever was putting in the work, and a seat more akin to a camping chair in the back for whoever was just along for the ride. In fact, the word bicycle was deceiving - it was technically a tricycle, since there were two larger wheels in the back to help support all the weight.
In short - it was ridiculously dorky and didn’t look like anything a normal college student would head to school on. However, Senku didn’t know why he should be that shocked - of course Byakuya would buy something as cheesy as the tricycle in front of them.
“The last time either of us touched those bikes was when I tried to get you to go on a biking trail with me. After my training, it was much easier for me! But I don’t remember you liking it very much… so I thought it was time for something new,” Byakuya explained. “And with this, you two can ride together to campus instead of riding side-by-side! Isn’t that better?”
No, it isn’t. It just means one of us will be doing a hell of a lot more work than the other, Senku thought. The mention of the last time he used a bike was a humble reminder as well. He remembered that day well - Byakuya blazing ahead of him while Senku wondered why anyone bothered trying to bike uphill. By the time he caught up to him at the top, Senku was out of breath and vowed to never touch the bike again. “I’m not using this thing. You should return it while you still can.”
However, Byakuya wasn’t going to give up that easily. He had hope for the idea - and he wanted to see Senku make friends with the new neighbor after seeing her put in that first step over and over again. “There was an expensive instrument you were looking at the other day, wasn’t there?” Byakuya began. “It was… a FIA machine, right?”
The mention of the machine caught Senku’s attention. He was no stranger to lifting Byakuya’s credit card and making expensive purchases on it for some equipment - but that particular machine was nearly four million yen. Even the one in the university wasn’t available for most students to use. “What are you getting at, old man?”
Byakuya smiled, knowing he now had Senku’s full attention. “Just use it once, that’s all I’m asking. Offer her a ride to campus tomorrow when she asks you to ride with her.”
One offer for a ride on this for a FIA machine? Really? “It’s a deal, then. You’re going to regret it when you end up taking out a loan, though.”
Especially since he never said that the ride had to be accepted… and I doubt anyone wants to be seen on this thing.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
Riding to campus was relatively easy. Honestly, thanks to where your parents had recently moved, it was mostly downhill or flat land except for the very end - so the journey to and from your morning and afternoon classes never took more than an hour each day. Plus, it was much easier than dealing with traffic and fuel prices in the city. So, it was the obvious choice on non-rainy days.
You kept your bike on the side of your house - so, each morning when you went to unlock it, you always ran into the same person: Senku Ishigami, your neighbor. Since you found out he goes to the same university as you and usually either walks or takes public transportation to school, you’ve always made him the same offer in the mornings.
“Good morning, Senku! Do you want to ride to campus together?”
His response had never changed - he always said no. It wasn’t as if he didn’t own a bike. The only reason you asked the first time was because you could see two nearly-identical bikes leaning against the side of his house. However, he never seemed to touch them. You wondered why he bothered walking to campus when riding a bike was much more efficient… so, every day, you kept asking.
And kept getting rejected. Not that you ever expected that to change.
As you were strapping your helmet on that morning, in fact, you caught Senku walking past your house. “Good morning, Senku!” you began happily. “Do you want to ride to school together?”
You had already mounted your bike, ready to take off the moment he said no when he caught you by surprise. Instead of the usual rejection, Senku reached out, putting his hand on the handlebar of your bike to keep you from going anywhere. “I have a better idea,” he smiled. There was a glint in his ruby eyes that made you somewhat nervous - as if you’d missed something important. “Why don’t you let me take us to campus together?”
While part of you was happy he was deciding to somewhat take you up on your offer, there was something… off about his acceptance. You raised an eyebrow somewhat suspiciously at him. “Do you drive a car…?”
“Oh, no. But I have something else in mind. I’ll be right back.”
He walked just ten feet down to his house and disappeared as he turned the corner, leaving you guessing as to what was going on until you saw him come back into view…
… with something you’d never guessed he’d own in ten billion years.
Upon seeing the shock on your face, Senku chuckled. “I know - it’s awful, right? My dad bought it for me,” he began. “He said I should take you up on your offer… and that I should offer you a ride. How about it?”
Senku was expecting a rejection. In fact, with Byakuya watching from their window, he was banking on it. One offer for a four million yen machine. It was an easy win.
To his surprise, you smiled and began to lock up your bike again. “Absolutely,” you agreed, keeping your helmet on as you climbed onto the chair in the back. “Let’s go!”
His expression quickly twisted into shock the moment you climbed onto the tricycle. “Are you sure?” Senku asked carefully. “I mean, it’s -”
“I’m sure,” you cut him off, leaning back in the seat as you kept eye contact with him. “You’ve said no to me for weeks. I want to be here now that you’ve changed your mind. A tacky tricycle won’t stop me.”
All Senku could think to do was stare blankly at you for a moment before nodding, putting on his own helmet. It pushed down his wild hair until it was falling against his face, tickling his neck at how long it really was. “If you’re sure,” he muttered. “Then let’s go.”
How hard can it be to ride a tricycle mostly downhill anyway? Senku thought, false hope filling him as they rode the first hill down and out of their neighborhood together.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
The moment they reached the uphill section that led to the gates of their campus, Senku remembered why he hated biking so much.
The beginning of the bike ride had been simple. In fact, when they’d been going downhill, Senku had even deceived himself into thinking it would be over soon. The force they gathered by getting out of their neighborhood had even been enough to leave them cruising during a lot of the flatter portions. However, by the time the bike had run out of momentum, Senku was already struggling.
Now, as the two of them sat on the bike and looked at the steep uphill ride, Senku began wondering if this was really worth the four million yen.
It didn’t take more than a moment for you to pick up on Senku’s hesitance. “Are we walking this bike uphill from here?” You asked, a touch of humor barely detectable in your tone. After seeing Senku start to struggle on flat terrain, you had doubts about him being able to get you both uphill. Hell - even if he was by himself - you doubted he’d make it far.
Senku knew that, at this point, there was no way for Byakuya to know if they didn’t make it all the way through the campus gates. No matter what he did here, he was securing the FIA machine he wanted. However, he also wasn’t one to half-ass the challenge he was given. If he was going to do this, he was going to do it all the way. “No, stay seated,” he began, a new sense of determination filling him. “We’re going to make it.”
… The newfound determination lasted all of three minutes before Senku was basically panting as he pedaled the bike, students passing you both by with suspicious glances and whispers to one another. When you started to notice the sweat going through his shirt and how much he was shaking, though, you couldn’t sit back and say nothing anymore. “Senku, are you okay? Please don’t die on the way to campus. I have a test today and I don’t want to delay it by having a crisis about killing my neighbor.”
Senku turned his head and looked back, a slight glare in his eyes. “You’re the one who accepted the ride.”
“You’re the one who offered! This is hardly my fault. Have you never ridden a bike before? Is that why Byakuya got you a tricycle?”
Suddenly, Senku hit the brakes on the bike, stopping to fully turn back to face you. He expected to find actual annoyance about the scenario you were in clear on your face, but instead, you were smiling. It caught him off guard for a moment - that, despite the past few minutes, you still simply seemed happy to be there. “We’re switching,” he said before he could stop to consider another option. “You’re having way too much fun back there.”
“Really? Okay! You’re holding my bag, though.”
Your acceptance was another thing to catch him off guard. The two of you weren’t even a five minute walk away from the gates. You could’ve easily said no, got off the bike, and walked the rest of the way to campus. Instead, you’d happily accepted the responsibility, making Senku raise an eyebrow with you as he got comfortable. “Why are you actually switching?”
“Because we’re not making it up this hill if you’re the one pedaling.”
“You know what I mean. You could leave me here.”
You just spared him one last look over your shoulder, a smile still on your face. “Why would I do that? You got us this far. I can do the hard part. Besides… I’m guessing that, after today, we’ll never do this again. May as well enjoy it while it lasts, right?”
As you started making progress with much less effort, Senku had an idea for how not to make this a one-time thing.
⋆✴︎˚。⋆
“That is not the same bike it was before,” you began, your jaw nearly dropping. “What did you do to it?”
After how things had gone yesterday when Senku offered you a ride to campus, you expected it to never happen again. Not only because he seemed to be completely exhausted by the end, but because you had seen him dismantling the bike when you’d arrived back home after staying at the university to study. That, more than anything else, appeared to be the nail in the coffin.
You never expected him to be dismantling the bike in order to transform it into something else overnight.
Senku couldn’t hide the grin that spread across his face at your surprise. “It’s self-pedaling now, solar powered to save the need for any battery or fuel. I also added some… heat powered engines to keep us going forward in the case of there not being enough momentum.”
“Heat-powered?” You asked, looking down at what appeared to be rockets secured to the sides of the two back wheels. “This looks like it’s going to kill us if it goes wrong. I’m in.”
By now, Senku had started to grow used to your somewhat radical acceptance of whatever was happening around you. He thought he should’ve noticed it from the moment you accepted the ride from him in the first place, but it wasn’t until you accepted his demand to switch seats like it was no sweat that he realized that’s just who you were. You never seemed to remain shaken by anything thrown at you - you adjusted, accepted, and threw yourself into the task with a smile.
It was a ridiculously admirable trait in his opinion. He was the same way - there was no use trying to ignore or change the principals of the world. All he could do was educate himself on every aspect of it and use science and invention to move forward.
“Good. Then get on…” he said, gesturing to the seat in the back as he got into the former pedaling seat. Not that it actually required anyone to pedal anymore. “…and you might want to hold on.”
“Hold onto what?” You asked, barely securing your helmet in time before the bike came to life. The moment it started, you knew exactly what he meant, and you reflexively moved forward to grab onto Senku’s shoulders. While he had the handlebars to grasp onto, all you had was him - and with the bike immediately hitting high speeds, you really didn’t want to simply sit back.
The journey downhill was relatively smooth, if not a little faster than either of them expected. It wasn’t until they were taking turns that Senku realized that this design was not well-suited for turning on any terrain. It didn’t take more than the first turn for you to notice that, either. “Uhm, I don’t know if we should be turning at this speed,” you spoke up, leaning forward a little more so your chin hovered just above Senku’s shoulder. “In fact, I know we shouldn’t be.”
“We’ll be fine,” Senku started to assure you. “It’s just a little -”
Less than a second later, Senku was shown how it was not fine.
He considered it lucky, though. Of all the places to lose control of the bike and crash, he was glad it was somewhere public and familiar. If it had been hidden or in an unfamiliar area and both of you were hurt, you were both in trouble. Luckily, though, he knew the exact grassy slope you were now each falling down, and thanks to both of your helmets, you were protected. You had grabbed hard onto Senku when the bike crashed, which meant that when you were thrown off, you two were thrown off together. When you rolled down the hill, it was in a tangle of limbs, each of you rolling over the other.
When you finally came to a stop at the bottom of the slope, though, Senku was lying on top of you. The bike was already forgotten to him, his one focus making sure that he could still feel all his limbs before checking on you. However, by the time his glance down at his arms and legs to make sure there was nothing more than surface-level scratches was complete, you already seemed to be in good spirits. “I guess we’re never riding to campus on that thing ever again, are we?”
Looking down at you, he was relieved that you were alright. In fact, you were smiling. “No, we’re not,” Senku couldn’t help but let a smile tug at his lips as well. “Does anything get under your skin?”
“Not when I have a hot guy on top of me. Pretty hard to stay mad in that scenario.”
Senku’s expression went blank as he pulled himself off of you, moving to the side and clearing his throat, suddenly desperate to change the subject. “Come on. If you’re feeling well enough to say that, you’re fine enough to get up and walk the rest of the way to campus with me.”
“Hey! Not even a ‘sorry for making us crash’?”
“Nope. Failure is part of the process. Apologizing for that is a waste,” Senku said, standing with a grunt before turning back to you and offering a hand. “Now come on. Let’s get out of here.”
You accepted his hand without hesitation, but when it came to Senku actually helping you up, you still had to do most of the work.
Still, when it came to being with him, you didn’t mind doing the hard part.
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