the moons reaching for me

she 05 esfp sp 279 xl|U|Ai #VENT ACC

[girlytips]

ロマプリおすすめの特集一覧ページです。かわいいお姫様系インテリア家具・雑貨のロマンティックプリンセス（ロマプリ）。アンティーク調・クラシカルなデザイン、猫脚家具などのアイテムを多数取り扱っています。ロマンティックプリンセス（ロマプリ）はネット通販のスクロールR＆Dが運営しています

Reminder that RomaPri posts "room coords" for girly kei and hime kei rooms! Very useful for room decor ideas and drawing references!

[lustingfood]

Strawberry Cake (x)

[melatonin-melanin]

jirai kei as a trend and the inherent ableism and racism present within it

if you've been present in any japanese fashion or vtuber spaces for the past few years, chances are you've most likely heard of jirai kei. it's gotten major media attention in japan, and inevitably its popularity has spread overseas. what is still misinterpreted about it, however, is that jirai kei is a fashion style. jirai kei is a stereotype, as well as a subculture that features fashion elements. as opposed to the fashion aspects, the focus of the subculture is mental illness, and many people use the jirai tags and labels to find those with similar struggles and interests. you can learn more about the recent history of jirai kei as a stereotype here, and the fashions associated with jirai kei here.

jirai kei as a stereotype is bad for a multitude of reasons, but there are many people who seem to think that there's nothing wrong with the trend itself. i've seen many arguments in favor of it, ranging from "if brands are using it, that must mean the term isn't that bad" to "plenty of japanese girls are using it to only refer to the fashion, and they don't actually lash out at others or self-harm." its usage by brands and everyday people are true, and that much cannot be argued. the problem comes from assuming that, because it's something widespread in japan, it can't possibly be as bad as people make it out to be. if this trend were to come from anywhere else, i'm almost certain that people would immediately question the morality of it for several reasons. this is going to be a long post, so i hope you have some time.

TW for mentions of self-harm, alcohol and drug abuse, and child sex trafficking below the cut.

a brief rundown of jirai kei's origins

to start, jirai kei's original coinage before the trend has existed since around the 90s. it was used by misogynistic men to refer to women who they believed exhibited signs of emotional instability. this was applied to completely harmless traits, and the criteria for someone being a landmine has drastically changed over the years. for example, the first common identifier was simply "a girl who looks put together." this sexist usage still extends to present times, but now it's often conflated with the current aestheticized definition of the term.

the source of the current iteration of jirai kei

the modern-day jirai kei stereotype comes almost entirely from a gang known as the toyoko kids, who reside in kabukicho. this gang contains many members ranging from ages 9 to 24 who have run away from their homes and families. they have been known for several activities, but the most publicized ones are cutting themselves in public circles, papa katsu (underage prostitution), heavily drinking, and overdosing on over-the-counter medications. majority of the gang members also wear japanese alternative fashions, with girly kei being the fashion that's most often present in the jirai kei stereotype.

where does the ableism come in?

the rise of the aesthetic trend peaked somewhere in 2020, where a "landmine makeup challenge" gained popularity online and resulted in various people attempting to mock and mimic the stereotype for clout. people would wear girly fashion, act "wild" or "crazy" on camera, and, at worst, pretend to cut their wrists or even use makeup to create fake self-harm scars. i don't believe i need to explain why faking self-harm for views is ableist. however, the ableism is also present in the supposed "lighter" aspects of the trend, particularly its sudden association with girly fashion.

during the height of jirai kei's popularity in japan, many brands had begun to sell pink x black girly coordinates, advertising them as jirai kei fashion. it's incredibly important to note that girly as a fashion has existed for several years prior, and that multiple people had already been wearing clothing that's abruptly being labeled jirai. as a result, you have all of these random people minding their business suddenly being labeled as "crazy psycho bitches" because of the clothes that they wear. as if that isn't enough, some brands went as far as to promote the more dangerous aspects of the stereotype as well. with attempts to pander to girls who are deemed "yandere" and "highly explosive," many shops, online influencers, and companies had directly and indirectly capitalized on the suffering of the toyoko kids by encouraging people to cut their wrists, manipulate their partners, binge drink, and lash out at others to engage in the "full landmine experience."

mental illness in japan is almost never taken seriously because it's seen as a personality flaw rather than something that needs treatment. the jirai kei trend only set back any progress made for mental health acknowledgement in society, as people perceived as landmines began to be harassed for wearing girly fashion. more girls were approached by men on the street trying to scout them for prostitution, and people gave away their wardrobe because "others assumed they were troublesome" for wearing it. from another perspective, the anti-recovery nature of the trend has also taken lives. some people who felt that they identified with the term had fully embraced the lifestyle that was commercialized and promoted as something "cute and fun," resulting in more people running away from home to be like the toyoko kids. these people, who have essentially been failed by the system, are simultaneously fetishized and shunned for the fact that they're struggling.

well, what about the racism?

the racism present in the jirai kei trend, from what i've seen, mainly comes from overseas communities. the perception that many people have of jirai kei tends to have its roots in orientalism. if you've ever witnessed how people tend to glorify japan in almost every context, this shouldn't be too surprising. what's concerning, however, is that much of this glorification of jirai still goes unacknowledged by the western j-fashion community.

when jirai kei gained popularity in japan's mainstream, people mistook the name of the stereotype for the name of the fashion. this mindset also translated over to western spaces without a second thought. as a result, when jirai kei as a stereotype was formally introduced to overseas j-fashion communities, some were confused and oddly adamant. it seemed like people thought, "there's no way that japan would endorse something so horrible. there has to be different explanations!" regardless of whether this idea was conscious or subconscious, it had begun what people now call "jirai discourse" in the community. many arguments were made in favor of using jirai kei to refer solely to girly fashion, as opposed to recognizing its origins and continuous usage as a derogatory term. an especially common viewpoint that's perpetuated is that jirai kei has been reclaimed or is in the process of being reclaimed, which is something that has several things wrong with it.

problems with thinking that jirai is "reclaimed, so it's fine to use"

firstly, reclamation is subjective. the assumption that the entirety of a minority group makes the unanimous decision to reclaim a term is frankly just implausible. even more popular words that are thrown around more casually nowadays are still debated in some circles on whether or not they should be used. for a term like jirai kei, something fairly recently coined and undoubtedly controversial in most contexts, the mere idea of reclamation amongst anyone would have to take a much longer time, and that's only if the stereotype starts getting taken seriously.

secondly, the only people who have the right to consider reclamation are the people who are directly affected by the usage of this term, which would be feminine-presenting native japanese people who are mentally ill. people overseas have argued in favor of reclaiming the term despite not being a part of the group that the term is actually used against. this is not something where you can take apart the criteria and suddenly claim that you're also affected by jirai kei's usage. for a comparison that may be easily understood, that's like if a nonblack woman tried to advocate for the reclamation of the "mammy" stereotype, which stereotypes and therefore only affects the perception of black women. just because both groups consist of women, that doesn't mean they have the exact same experience with the stereotype in question, even if they happen to resonate with some aspect of it. unless you've grown up in japan as someone afab and/or feminine-presenting and have struggled with mental health, it's nearly impossible to fully identify with the extent of jirai kei's harm because it's occurred in such a specific set of circumstances to a specific group of people. the only thing that should be done in this case is doing your research on the affected group, which you can do by looking into the history of the toyoko kids and some of the individual stories of the members. that way, you can at least attain a better understanding of their perspectives and connect the effects of jirai kei to their struggles.

lastly, it is not reclaiming to simply use the term for yourself. this tends to be where the idea of jirai kei being reclaimed comes from, because many japanese girls on social media use the term to refer to themselves as well. in these instances, there are typically two separate reasons: one, the person is pretending to be a landmine for clout; or two, they genuinely identify with the derogatory meaning of the term. the latter is often the case, since there's not many other ways for people in japan who are mentally ill to find groups for themselves. when it comes to reclamation, it's important to remember that it's not simply using a word that was used against a group that you're a part of. reclaiming is about actively working to change a term's meaning into a neutral or positive context for the benefit of the group. none of these girls are doing that. there's no big effort in japanese landmine spaces to move the perception of being a landmine away from things like girly kei fashion, idol fan culture, or toxic behaviors, which leads me to the final section of this post.

it is not anyone's job to push for the "reclamation" of jirai kei.

i put reclamation in quotes because, although some genuinely may not have ill intentions, many people come off as having a "white savior" mindset as opposed to actually wanting to reclaim the term in any sense (which, as mentioned before, is not the right of just anyone), and it's usually for the sake of enjoying girly fashion without feeling bad for incorrectly calling it jirai kei. one of the defenses often used to propose that being seen as a landmine can actually be a good thing is that the people who do self-harm and abuse substances are simply "bad apples" in the landmine community. if they're not treated as the dirty underside, then they're seen as things to be pitied and sympathized with, but with the quick disclaimer of "don't worry though, not all landmines are like this!"

not only is this incredibly ableist, but this assumption being made by mainly white influencers is also rooted in the historical development of racism against asian people, particularly in the united states. if you've heard of the model minority myth, one of the biggest issues with it is that it heavily generalizes asian people as being well-mannered, good-natured, and upstanding citizens. as a result, anyone who seems to fall out of this generalization is deemed an "untrustworthy foreigner" and appears as nonexistent through a romanticized lens. this exact situation can be applied to how people tend to treat the issues surrounding the jirai kei trend. the japanese girls who are faking and/or making fun of mental instability for the sake of online popularity are suddenly being glorified as these ideal representations of jirai kei to be palatable to the western world. meanwhile, the people who are considered by many to be part of the lowest rungs of society and are actually getting this term thrown at them pejoratively are treated as an afterthought and not representative of what people overseas want jirai kei to mean. it's even to the extent where native japanese people using girly kei or being uncomfortable with jirai kei are immediately assumed to be faking their ethnicity or their japanese-speaking skills, something that many foreigners have actually done in an attempt to claim authority over jirai kei's usage. since the reality of the trend is so uncomfortable to many, people think that it's best to simply disregard it or dumb down its impact when that changes nothing. what has avoiding the topic of discrimination and fetishization ever done for anyone?

the last thing i want to point out is that, even if reclamation of the term was in progress, it would not be happening the way that some seem to think it is. if the term was being reclaimed, we would not have people (both overseas and in japan) still acting like the stereotype for tons of likes, namely by taking pictures of themselves in girly kei next to cans of pink monster while sitting on the sidewalk with someone handing them money. that is an actual image i've seen, and if that doesn't tell you that there's a problem, i'm not sure what else will.

[poopc0re]

[chocolatecornet]

値下げしました！マザーガーデン　木製玩具　ドレッサー　mothergarden

[emilylovescookies]

alluring secret black vow redraw 🍎

[rindude-deactivated20240217]

Some of my favorite little twin star images from their Twitter,,, ^3^

[bisuko-ezaki-is-a-fraud]

Really tired of jirai kei supporters ruining Menhera-chan for a lot of people because they have declared her as their pro-self-harm icon despite her story being about the literal opposite, also had to block multiple accounts like that on here already. You really can’t reblog anything from accounts using the #メンヘラチャン tag on Twitter anymore over it because 99% of the time the account behind the post will be some jirai girl also posting cute selfies of her graphic self-harm, which the site will also start recommending.

Thanks for ruining a mental health character for everyone, very great, totally what Japan needed.

[ur-daily-inspiration]

Me and who

[fairy-tips]

It’s a bit of a hard one to explain – yumekawaii is more of a feeling than a specific outfit, and often a fairy kei outfit can be yumekawa!

I’ve made a handy set of collages to try show the difference, since it’s quite hard to explain in words…

Fairy kei outfits which are also yume kawaii:

image sources: KERA, Yuuukacandy @ WEAR, Gallery

The main keywords for yumekawa outfits are “yume” and “meruhen”, which are “dreamy” and “fairytale-like”. It’s a feeling of an outfit, which means that any kind of style, including fairy kei, can be yumekawa. A dreamy outfit often involves layering, pastels, the colour white, and sheer or drapey fabrics (such as peignoirs, panniers, sheer socks, sukajan etc). Since quite a few of those match the looks in fairy kei, this means the two often overlap! A lot of Listen Flavor’s current pastel items are yumekawaii, and look great in fairy kei!

Yume kawaii outfits which aren’t fairy kei

image sources: ayami0509 @ WEAR, WEGO, Yulayula @ Instagram

This is probably the most popular and typical kind of yume kawaii outfits in Japan, as it is easy to wear and looks casual as well as cute. It often includes white skirts (usually sheer), often paired with a pastel t-shirt or sweater. Dresses are often layered over a plain t-shirt for a comfy but cute look. Printed ankle socks and platforms are regularly worn, although white or pastel trainers/sneakers are often worn too. They still give of a dreamy feeling, despite being toned down, which is the main thing! A theme you may also notice in these images is…

Oversized in yumekawaii

image sources: yurimaru @ WEAR, Unsung Hero, Idol

Oversized is a hugely popular thing!! Whether it’s a huge t-shirt tucked into a high waisted skirt, or a massive t-shirt, huge soles on your shoes, or even loose socks, oversized is popular because a lot of people feel it makes you appear smaller, and thus cute and makes people want to protect you - kind of like a small cute animal haha (it’s weird logic but I’m just telling you what goes behind the idea)

But overall, yumekawa is just a feeling to an outfit similar to ~the fairy feeling~ that I talk about a lot. Mixing yume with yami (poison/illness) has also been popular, but I think that’d deserve it’s own post if you want me to go into it more!

The thing is, the jfash community outside of Japan tends to label things a lot. So when things like yumekawaii can appear in multiple styles, it can get a bit confusing! But the people within the japanese community tend to label things a lot less, and just give their outfit a feeling as opposed to a specific style. This is why sometimes you can wear an entirely pastel outfit and it still not look fairy kei! Personally, I think we should try following how we want an outfit to feel more often, as it opens up so many doors to new styles and looks!

I hope that explains it, and I managed to get it across well! ♥

[fairy-tips]

YAMI (病み) in Yume Kawaii

A continuation to my guide on yume kawaii, I will discuss how “yami” features in yume kawaii, and how to incorporate it into fairy kei! 

As mentioned, the person behind the term “yume kawaii” was ex-BiS member Ichigo Rinahamu, the self proclaimed strawberry princess. In this screencap she is describing her vision of yume kawaii: 

Fairytale + Yami = Yume Kawaii♡

But what actually is “yami”? Yami means “sickness” or “poison”. It’s a way of incorporating a slight darkness into your outfit, despite it looking cute. Dreams are never perfect, and can often turn into nightmares. Due to this, it’s fun to add a bit of nightmare-ish edge to your coord! Listen Flavor often has a yami twist to their pastel clothing, with needles, melting motifs, and evil characters in all pastel. 

Here are some examples of Rinahamu’s coords, and how they feature yami:

image sources: Girls Be, Unsung Hero, Rinahamu on Twitter

These coords all feature yami despite looking cute - the first coord features a pastel bondage-style choker, which contrasts the cutesy look. The second coord features two anime characters in an…erotic situation, for lack of better words, and the third is a dreamy yankee style. These things all contrast the original theme, while still fitting in with the outfit. You can do the same, using warning signs, chokers, “offensive” text, and cute band-aids! With these small changes, you can add a dangerous feeling to your coord ☆

Yami doesn’t necessarily mean creepy cute, and can often be found in pastel coords. Even before it was given a name, yami items were still often used.

The one that sticks out to me was from a feature I saw on Kawaii International, where Moco discussed this handmade choker which says “Keep Out ⚠ Danger” on it. She said she liked the contrast it gave to her all pastel magical girl style coord.

Yume kawaii is usually seen as more of an aesthetic than strictly a fashion, which means when you google it lots of cute images pop up that don’t actually feature any clothing. However, as well as cute dreamy aesthetic pictures, often (slightly depressing) menhera images pop up, as well as magical girl themes.

Japanese text: L “Would you like to reset?” R “If you call me ugly, I’ll kill you”

image sources: lettuce, makamegu516, naver, charismatalk,

This picture is often shown when searching “yami kawaii’ and “yume kawaii” as it features dreamy clothing with yami staples, specifically the band-aid knee OTKs and loose socks. sadly I can’t find a source… Menhera and yume kawaii are often linked and yami kawaii was actually made to go against yume kawaii! If you want more info check @fymenhera​ (trigger warning for gore)

Another point is LAVENDER. Something that I found extremely interesting is how lavender is often worn in yumekawa. This is because the cool tones of lavender gives the outfit a more mysterious and dreamlike feeling! 

images: senanan

OTK socks are extremely popular as these can feature yami motifs while adding cuteness to your outfit - indie subcul brand Shoujo Kenjoku Kakumei features yami kawaii designs, with dreamy colours.

images: shoujo kenjoku kakumei (autoplay warning!)

Overall, it’s a really interesting topic to see how the two styles are mixing! Can you see how this fits in to fairy kei? I’d recommend looking at your favourite coords to see if you can spot any yume and yami elements ✨ 

I hope you enjoy! If you have any more questions about yume kawaii or any other upcoming styles, please feel free to ask~

[wheresmyfuckintea]

ENNEAGRAM TYPE TWO : the giver

-> concerned with others & service

[k-enneagram]

2w3 Guide

The 2w3 personality in enneagram is also known as the host, and these individuals are social and ambitious and seek success in various areas including work and their interpersonal relationships.

2w3 individuals are likely to be very caregiving and affectionate, but they may also possess a single-minded focus on the things they feel they need to do for success.

2w3 may face challenges with excitement and try to achieve their goals, but they may also pay equal attention to their loved ones.

2w3 may also be rather altruistic, and sociable in their behavior and they may love to make connections with others and helping to make a difference in the world.

Keep reading

[funkymbtifiction]

How do I know if I am an ISFP or an ESFP?

Do you find yourself through experimentation (Se/Fi) or bring yourself emotionally to every experience and reject experiences that don't line up with with your inner self (Fi/Se). ESFPs learn about their values through trying things and deciding how it made them feel; ISFPs already know what they feel and reject experiences that don't line up with that (I am not this kind of person, I won't do that Fi/Se vs Se/Fi -- sure I'll try that, well I didn't like it, won't do it again).

Please also check the isfp x esfp tags. :)

[llimerense]

ive been posting this image everywhere bagshahaga anywayyyy heres my fit from today + a milkshake my mama got meeee

[llimerense]

recently ive been feeling like im the source of peoples discomfort and that maybw i am truly an awful person. at first i felt bad bec i thought i had no personality, thay nothing was special about me and that no one would remember me but now i fear that ill be remembered for being the worst person ever

idont mean to ?? i didnt want to?.. why are relationships so hard whether they be romantic pltonic whayever

[lovemehugmespankme]