blood sacrifices to better the world

hi! i'm just a normal trans girl living in kentucky! she/her

[localbloodmage]

hello croaker's wacky muppet friends! i decided to finally stop lurking and make a blog! my name's alisaie, but i usually just go by ali. dni blood magic haters, people who don't know the difference between a mage and a witch (unless you're willing to learn), homophobes, transphobes, bethany (you seem annoying), people who think tmj is strange aeons (my magic has shown me that they're not the same person), racists, and any other shitty people i forgot about. anyone else feel free to interact or send asks! i'd love to get to know some of the other people in this community better!

[the-muppet-joker]

Greetings, Homosapians

I'm the author of the former Muppet Joker blog and character. You may know me from my silly fictional scenarios and pretend muppet fixation.

"Pretend."

Oh, how the mighty fall.

It started as a bit, but unfortunately the personality traits and, ahem, interests of my Muppet Joker character began to infiltrate and eventually take over my life. My wife was sickened by my Muppet Lust and left me, taking our son. I was fired from my job because I kept Joker Laughing at the customers.

I am trying to fight the monster I have created within me and I am losing the battle. But at least I am in speaking terms with my beautiful wife again.

No longer am I posting "in character," but as my true self with the raw, messy account of my life. Yes, some aspects are exaggerated, like my job at the Dangerous Chemical Factory (...it doesn't JUST sell dangerous chemicals. It also sells deadly sharks).

There will not be a comedically elaborate DNI. That was childish and not representive of who I am. Instead, I will eventually be attaching a flow-chart to more clearly illustrate who is and is not allowed to look at my posts. Please read the whole thing before interacting.

Yes, it was a Bit. But it's not a Bit anymore. You think I would lie to the internet? Twice?

Anyways. Enjoy the madness. And... Heh.

Run while you can.

[localbloodmage]

are you doing ok? worried about you.

[localbloodmage]

That’s probably why

what's probably why.

[localbloodmage]

why was i not told about his funeral. i wanted to rub his death in the face of those mourning her to try to feel something again.

[localbloodmage]

thoughts on The Rot?

it scares me.

[localbloodmage]

wait, sorry im not an expert in bloodmage stuff, i tend to deal in potions and rituals, but i learned that muppet joker and strange are the same person? i know magic interpretation can be difficult but ive been doing it for 826 years, so im generally good at my craft? can i ask what evidence you recieved? what signs pointed you towards their dissimilarity?

this ask is from may but i hope this anon has learned the error of their ways now that the public can clearly see the croaker and strange in the same place.

[localbloodmage]

I’m the anon that asked the question—I just don’t know. :) I grew up in a situation where that kind of thing wasn’t allowed…. Can you tell me?

read back over my blog. i have been asked the difference between a mage and a witch so many times. if this is about that, you should be able to find the answer there.

[localbloodmage]

What's the best concoction to curse a neighbor's harvest? There's this one weird woman I live next to and her sugar cookies taste like shit. I'm currently doing 1/3 deer blood, 10 oz ever clear and the rest just watered down vanilla extract (approx. 24% purity) Will this do or will I need something more potent? (dealing with 12 acres of wheat grain if relevant)

more vanilla extract.

[localbloodmage]

What is the difference between a mage and a witch? Also can mages resurrect people?

how are there people that still don't know the answer to this question?

[marsha-landlord]

I accidentally went to the grocery store covered in blood again.

[localbloodmage]

can i have some?

[marsha-landlord]

Next time I will be in touch.

[localbloodmage]

thank you. i'm running low. i used too much cursing the croaker and placing anti-piss wards upon the ballpit.

[marsha-landlord]

I accidentally went to the grocery store covered in blood again.

[localbloodmage]

can i have some?

[localbloodmage]

apologies for not posting about my experiences at dashcon 2. i was not logged in to tumblr on my phone and i forgot my login. i will try to be more active. it may be hard with this new strange empty feeling that suddenly hit me after the duel.

[localbloodmage]

i did it. my curse allowed strange to defeat the croaker in the duel. kermit is dead now and in hell. wghy do i feel so empty now?

[localbloodmage]

What if my lemon theivery has been left in the past? Do I still have to go..................

you can stay.

[localbloodmage]

lemon thieves dni.

[marsha-landlord]

what are your opinions on blood magic?

I do not know enough about blood magic to respond properly.

[localbloodmage]

it's magic powered by the symbolic energy of blood sacrifices.

[tenant-eight]

may i interact?

Do you like wearing Knee Length Jorts?

[localbloodmage]

no.

[tenant-eight]

Well I did.

You are Ok to Interact if you solve my Maze.

[localbloodmage]

there are no walls to stop me from walking around.