Remnant Daughter
Loki x Deceased!Reader x Daughter OC
Loki loved you. There was no one else he loved more than you. The day you died he resolved to protect that love that had resulted in a daughter. She was a perfect reminder of you, one he would preserve. No harm would ever come to her so long as he lived.
Warning: None really. Just note that here Loki never tried taking over Midgard. When he found out his Jotun heritage he didn’t resent Odin and Frigga, rather thanked them for his upbringing.
“Loki-”
Loki tossed and turned in his bed as he heard his name being called out. The voice was meek and full of desperation. His skin began to turn blue as his mind took him back to the day he lost you.
Your lower body shook and trembled as you had yet to recover from delivering your baby daughter. One hand kept you stable along the cold cavern walls as the other held your newborn close to your chest.
A cold huff of air escaped you as you got closer to the cavern’s opening where you could hear your husband fending off the intruders.
Unfortunately, your pregnancy had not been easy. Only Jotunheim housed the climate appropriate for your half-Jotun daughter. You were near death when you arrived, your skin burning to the touch. Only Loki was able to handle your feverish skin long enough to get you to where you had to be.
After finding out his true parentage Loki remained in Asgard- where his beloved was. All for you, he gave up his line to the throne letting it go to Laufey’s other son. A son who hated Loki’s very existence.
When he had gotten word of his being within the realm he sent for him. That is when they caught wind of his reason for coming back. Laufeyson ordered your child be taken and killed to honor his father’s wish that would have seen Loki dead in the first place.
Loki would never allow any harm upon his child. A child you had desperately wanted in order to complete the vision of a perfect family you always painted for him.
In full Jotun form, Loki growled, “Leave while I allow it.”
The Jotuns towered over him still, not backing down after being given strict orders from their king.
“Loki,” you happily sighed as you saw your husband was unharmed.
Loki’s chest constricted once he heard the sweet sound of your voice. Only in his sleep could he accurately recall how truly beautiful a sound it was.
Without a moment to spare you had your free arm wrapped around him as your daughter was warmly nestled between you. “Thank Norns you are safe.”
He returned your embrace kissing the top of your head before tucking it under his chin. “You should not be out here, it is not safe. He will send others.”
“How can I remain hidden and do nothing when you are outnumbered? I am your wife, I will forever stand by your side.”
Loki’s chest rose and fell rapidly as he desperately tried to will himself awake knowing very well what came next. But his efforts were fruitless as his mind made him relive the most traumatic moment of his life.
"Choose, your wife or your daughter?”
“Don’t you dare harm her!”
Laufeyson inched his ax closer to your neck when Loki took a step towards him, making you feel the sharp edge against your rapidly cooling skin. He had stripped you of the warm fur-lined coat that had kept your body temperature stable in the harsh cold of the realm. The thin Asgardian dress did little to shield you from the sharp winds. Hypothermia would soon claim you who was not built for such an environment.
Loki tried to keep from showing how horrified he was by the decision. He could see the fear in your eyes, the paling of your skin, and the soft whimpering of his newborn which he held in his arms. It was impossible to choose.
He could never hand over his daughter and yet he could not fathom the idea of returning to Asgard without you.
“Daddy~”
“Choose!”
“L-loki,” you shivered. “Please take her and go,” you begged him through teary eyes. Of course, you did not want to die but you would give your life for his and hers. You wanted nothing more than their happiness.
“I can’t-”
“Please just...” you knew Loki would never make the decision. You knew you had to make it for him.
His eyes widened as he saw your hand discreetly pull a dagger out of your sleeve as you wordlessly mouthed your final confession of love for him.
Loki’s eyes shot open when small hands began to hit his chest repeatedly. His ragged breathing came to a halt when he saw the look of concern on his five-year-old daughter.
“Kari, what are you doing here?”
“I could not sleep.”
Her bright red eyes examined his expression knowing very well that this was the case for him as well. Unlike Loki, she had no control over her eyes as they remained her natural Jotun red but lacked the sheer darkness behind them. There was a gleam that illuminated them, undeniably inherited from you. That very same gleam that had gotten him to notice you when he had been surrounded by women who only sought him for his title.
“You were having a bad dream Daddy.” In an effort to comfort her father Kari wrapped her little arms around his torso laying her head against his chest. “Was it about Mommy?”
As he looked down at her he could not help but remember the way you would cling to him begging him to stay with you a moment longer instead of going about his duties. If he knew then how limited his time with you would be... he would have fulfilled your every wish. Now all he could do was regret.
“It was,” he responded by putting his own arms around her and kissing the top of her head.
Kari immediately looked up giving him a look of sorrow. “Daddy,” her eyes silently apologized for your absence. “Mommy isn’t here but I am. Kari will always be here for you.”
The heart-wrenching words of his concerned daughter had Loki smiling. He tucked her in with a light-hearted chuckle to show he had been relieved of his lamentations.
Once again she was his strength.
“I know my dear.”
He would live to protect this last remnant of you.
\\\
“If you have already finished the reading then perhaps it is time we introduce you to more complex literature.”
Kari sighed as she followed behind her grandfather’s advisor. He was a tutor to her when it came to diplomacy. As a princess Kari was expected to learn everything there was to be known about all the realms.
“Here,” the elder man handed her a rather large and heavy book. “This will be of use to you. I remember when I first read it. I was much younger then.”
“The reason I read so quickly is to rid myself of my duties. Had I known this was going to happen I would have dozed off longer.”
“Princess you have been gifted with a mind like no other.” He smiled at the young girl showing he meant well. “Your mother read her way through this library. She was always searching always wondering, a true scholar. Your father and mother were different in every sense. This was the only place they ever crossed paths.”
“So I hear... but I’m not nearly as interested in dusty old books.” She was an eight-year-old girl who wished to have fun with the other children. Until now she had been urged from one lesson to another. Diplomacy, etiquette, magic, archery, economics, language, astrology, and worst of all- math. But it mattered not what task they put in front of her. The young girl was incredibly talented with unmatched intelligence and natural charisma.
“I want to have fun.”
So much so that at times everyone was thankful Loki was so strict on her.
“What would your Highness consider fun?”
Kari shrugged, fun was never something she strived for. Only recently had the word come about after she heard the other noble children raving about how they spent their days riding horses to a secret waterfall the adults knew not of. And through books, she learned the most fun realm of all was Midgard.
“I would like to go to another realm.”
“Another realm?”
The little girl nodded, “I wish to see things for myself rather than read someone else’s account.” Her eyes trained themselves on the rainbow bridge which she could make out in the distance from the window. “Someday I will travel and become master of all realms.”
“How ambitious of you little one.”
Kari beamed as she heard her grandmother’s voice.
“Queen Frigga,” the advisor gave a curt bow of his head which she acknowledged. At the same time, he was relieved of his duties as Kari’s tutor to be turned over to her. He left the royals with a cautionary warning to the young one that she should not overlook the wisdom of old dusty books.
Being in the presence of her grandmother Kari knew she could relax, evident by the way she rid herself of the glamour spell she had perfected to conceal her bright red eyes with beautiful gold irises. Although beautiful she much rather preferred that which made her different.
“Much better,” she exhaled contently.
Frigga smiled, “My...what a beautiful granddaughter I have been bestowed.” Her hand gently prodded Kari’s chin to tilt her head up so she could meet her eyes.
The compliment immediately gained Kari’s laughter. “You always say that...”
“And I always mean it.”
The little girl’s smile reached her eyes only to be withdrawn when she heard the familiar grumbling of her grandfather. “Kari!” He sternly called her name, not a fan of her openly displaying her Jotun heritage.
Immediately she hid her eyes from view.
“What have I told you?”
Kari sighed, the lecture had been engraved in her memory. “That I must adapt to what Asgard expects of me... and what they expect is a well-mannered, well-bred Asgardian princess.”
The rest of Asgard knew not of Loki’s lineage. For his sake and now for Kari’s sake, Odin had them conceal their Jotun attributes in order to keep any from questioning Loki as a prince of Asgard. This was helped by the fact that you, a sensible young woman from a noble family took an interest in his son. You hid the truth well even from your own family who to this day believe you had died of complications during childbirth.
They never approved of your relationship with Loki, in turn, they despised Kari for causing your premature death.
This was something Kari had no knowledge of. Loki made sure her life was nothing but positive. If ever an inconvenience arose he would deal with it. Therefore your family no longer resided in Asgard.
“Do not be so hard on her, she is only a child.”
Odin sighed knowing there was truth to Frigga’s statement but he was only looking out for his granddaughter. He truly cared for her. He had to ensure her future as a princess of Asgard. “She is the firstborn princess of Asgard. It is a title she must not take lightly.”
Loki appeared as if out of nowhere, his hands behind his back as he sported a playful smirk. “I really do wish Thor would just marry and give you other grandchildren to torment.”
He was grateful for Odin taking him in but knew all his life he had been at a disadvantage with Thor who was a blood son. He knew once his brother had children Odin would turn his attentions to them the future Kings or Queens of Asgard.
“Loki!” Frigga warned her youngest son to watch what he said, especially in front of Kari.
“Daddy,” Kari ran into her father’s arms happy to see he was back. Her arms latched around his neck as she rested her head on his shoulder. “I missed you.”
“And I missed you, my little one.” One arm carried her weight while the other hand gave her full head of silk-like hair a pat.
Odin remained silent not justifying himself to Loki. He had his reasons for doing things the way he did just as Loki had his.
Thor soon appeared as well having been left behind by his brother.
“Uncle Thor,” one hand reached out to him wanting to also greet him but not enough to let go of her father.
“Kari, my sweet princess.” He smiled brightly at the affectionate scene before him of his niece latching onto his brother. Never had he seen him so openly display affection before Kari’s birth. Even with you, he seemed to hide his attraction making others question the validity of your relationship at one point. He reached out to hold her hand in his and kissed the top. “I hope you have behaved yourself while we were gone.”
“Of course she has.” “Of course I have.” Father and daughter simultaneously respond.
“Then I suppose we can bestow you with the gift we have brought.”
Kari’s eyes lit up. “A gift!”
The entire royal family had trekked out into the stables where Kari’s gift lay in wait. A gift that was actually not from her uncle or father.
A crowd of people was gathered in awe at the gift. For many this was a new creature for others it was a memory of the past for there had been many in Asgard until they went extinct. They waited to hear how the creature had ended up here.
“Alfheim has gifted one of their precious unicorns to the firstborn princess of Asgard.”
Kari gasped seeing the white unicorn that stood as a stark contrast to the surrounding horses. The unicorn’s distinct horn was incredibly long and shiny, when the light caught it there seemed to be an iridescent shine like opal or pearl. The mane was hard to describe in one word. It was white but somewhere in between, it seemed to give a hint of blue shine. One thing was for sure, the mane was long and silky in the way each strand fell perfectly back in place.
“Is it really for me?” She held her father’s hand tight with giddiness.
Loki was not fond of the idea of his daughter riding but had to admit defeat at the happiness she was radiating. “If you promise to behave and take lessons before attempting to ride him-”
“Him, hmmm...” The young girl tapped her chin in her pursuit of a suitable name for her beautiful new companion. Her hand slipped out of her father’s to approach the magical looking creature. That is how she was able to see the sporadic deep blue streaks of hair that were outnumbered by the white. “Azure,” she spoke mostly to herself yet to the unicorn. “Did you know there are hundreds of words for the color blue. There are many languages and dialects each with their own word.” Her hand gently ran through the ends of his mane, the only part she could reach. “You look more like an Azure.”
“What a lovely name my dear,” Frigga beamed seeing how her spirit had been lifted after being reprimanded by Odin.
“Yes, but what good is a horse you can not ride.” Thor, the ever fun-loving uncle that he was, went against his brother’s wishes and lifted his niece up onto the unicorn’s back.
“It is not your ordinary horse you oaf!” Loki scolded. His brother knew not of a unicorn’s differing mannerisms and personalities to horses. They were far more gentle creatures with the temper of a bull and the charge of a rhino only far more dangerous with that sharp horn of theirs.
Kari was fighting with her urge to go along with her uncle or listen to her father’s demand for her to get off.
“Come now brother, nothing will happen. Let our young princess have some fun, Odin knows you did when you were younger.” With that Thor mounted Azure keeping his niece safely between his arms as he took the reigns.
To Loki’s surprise, Azure listened to Thor entertaining them with a steady gallop.
Odin’s lips seemed to curl up into a brief smile that only Frigga caught before he retired back into the palace. She brought her hand onto her son’s shoulder assuring him there was no harm.
Loki’s worries were only put to rest by Kari’s laughter. His daughter’s quick liking to the animal reminded him of you.
Loki smirked using your lack of agility to his advantage as he stole your current interest right out of your hands. He held the book above your reach to examine it. “What has my love so interested in Alfheim?”
Your brow furrowed in discontent, “It is none of your concern-”
“If you wish to visit you only need say so.”
The book was handed back to you allowing you something to grasp while you remind him of your situation. “You already know that is impossible when all of Asgard is watching us.”
You had married Loki only a few months ago and were determined to do everything in your power to earn your place. There were still too many who did not acknowledge your marriage to Loki simply because they thought Thor should be first to marry.
“You worry too much.”
“Do I?”
Loki nodded, “Now tell me why Alfheim?”
“Unicorns.”
“Unicorns,” Loki eyed you with skepticism. “A realm known for its magical knowledge, nature, music... and you simply want to see a horned horse?”
You nodded enthusiastically. “Unicorns are said to be magical creatures. The alicorn being the source of their magical and medicinal properties.”
Loki recalled watching you flip through books as you animatedly recounted your research on the rare creature. He could only imagine you would smile just as brightly upon the unicorn’s arrival.
Kari interrupted his thoughts when she came running to him. “Did you see me?”
“You were wonderful my little one.”
Although his lips were curled into a smile Kari could easily read her father. There was a certain look in his eyes, darkness, whenever he became saddened by the thought of you.
“I love you Daddy,” these four words were her magical tool against her father’s dark thoughts. She need only say it once for him to come back to his senses.
Loki truly smiled now, wonderfully surprised by his daughter’s sentiment. “I love you too.”
The young girl wondered if someday she could take her father’s pain away. She wanted him to be the fun mischievous person everyone always recalled in their stories of times before she was born.
That night Kari would not go to bed no matter how many times her nursemaid tried to coax her. She relentlessly went on about waiting for her father to be done so he could tuck her in like when she was younger.
“Princess your father is very busy-”
“I can wait.”
“Please princess have mercy on me. Your father will be very displeased with me if I do not complete my tasks.”
Kari had seen many nursemaids come and go throughout her short years. Each one having been replaced after Loki saw they were not fit to uphold his standards or if one got too attached to her.
He did not wish for anyone to play the role of mother to Kari. His daughter already had a mother.
“That is not my problem,” Kari crossed her arms over her chest standing firm. “I will do as I please until my father retires for the night.”
The nursemaid sighed unable to do anything but wait to be reprimanded and perhaps sent to another noble family to care for their children.
Hours later Loki had yet to retire.
Kari sleepily hung onto hope for a bit longer before going across the hall to his rooms in search of him. She pushed the heavy door to gain entrance into the silent chambers.
She knew if she would just call out to him he would appear before her but this time around she was curious to know why he had not come to see her. That’s when she heard a muffled sound coming from his study, the door slightly ajar.
Loki sat back in his chair, a chalice of mulled wine in his hand while he faced the farthest wall where a portrait of you hung as the only decoration. It was commissioned post-mortem when he realized there were no portraits of only you.
He concentrated greatly needing more time than usual to picture you in all your glory. Then in a second, you were standing before him in golden shine. It was an illusion he had created of you.
“It’s getting harder-” A knot in his throat stopped him mid-sentence. The thought of possibly forgetting you was more than he could handle. “Why can’t I summon you at will?”
The illusion of you stood still flickering slightly when he took a drink.
Lately, he could only remember you in your last moments of life. He found himself forgetting the finer details of your appearance and personality.
“I forget my love... did you like postmodern romanticism or was it transcendentalism?”
He took another drink and yet again you flickered.
Loki stared at the illusion he had made, judging the appearance. He always remembered that pale green dress you wore when he first noticed you. It fit you well, hugged all the right places and complimented your lustrous skin. Your hair and your face- he gripped the chalice trying to recall the color and feel.
The image that came to mind was much to generic for his liking... just like the portrait.
He stood up approaching the illusion and looked up at the portrait.
“Sure it is beautiful,” he admitted. It resembled you but was it truly you. “No one can ever accurately capture you, my love.”
Kari’s eyes teared up when she heard how hard it was getting for her father to speak.
“And your voice...”
“Loki,” the illusion called to him in your voice- or at least what he thought was your voice. “Loki, my love.”
“How I wish to hear it.” A tear finally found its way down Loki’s cheek as he resigned himself to the fact that even he couldn’t reproduce the sweet sound of your voice.
In his dreams, he heard it but it was always followed by your cries of pain.
“I love you Loki,” the illusion smiled with a tilt of its head in the same way you would every time you playfully professed your love to him.
When the chalice was empty Loki picked up the bottle and drank directly from it. The illusion flickered continuously until he had downed the entirety of it.
Kari stepped into the study now fully in tears from what she was seeing.
“Daddy...”
Loki quickly turned to see his daughter cautiously approaching him. “Kari-” he wanted to reprimand her for not being in bed but found it difficult when she was sorrowfully staring at his illusion of you.
Up until now, he had been careful not to do this in front of her. He knew it would be too much of an emotional trigger. He could hardly handle it himself. When he made a gesture to be rid of it Kari stopped him.
“Wait-” Her small hands reached out to him. Now it was she who compared the illusion to the portrait above. All she had ever seen was that portrait but never imagined her mother’s voice.
“C-can she-” she was almost afraid to ask. As if her father would deny her request. “Can she say my name?”
Loki inhaled sharply. His daughter’s request was difficult but not impossible.
“Kari~” the illusion called out effectively rendering the little girl motionless. This time Loki managed to envision your joyous expression upon his return from long trips. He had the illusion give a similar smile and say, “I love you Kari.”
“I love you too Mommy-”
The little girl’s lips trembled unable to stop herself from crying profusely. She had never met this woman yet she felt so strongly about her.
His daughter’s tears were sobering. Loki put down the bottle he had so viciously been gripping onto. He knelt down in front of his young daughter, the illusion now vanishing into nothing but golden specs of light.
“Kari-”
"Daddy...” Kari’s small arms wrapped around her father as she continued to cry into his chest.
Loki held her silently. There was nothing he could say that would make her feel better. For years he had tried finding comfort from the neverending pain he felt after your loss. But nothing could ever fill the void you left behind.
At one point he damned you for making him fall in love with you. He damned the empty promises of forever. You dared entice him with the picture of eternal love and a family to cherish and call his own only to leave him behind.
But in the end, he knew it was all worth it.
Loving you gave his life new meaning.
Before you, he never imagined himself as a father and now he couldn’t imagine a life without his precious daughter.
Kari found comfort in her father’s embrace although she didn’t care too much for the smell of alcohol on him. The gentle caress of her hair and the slight pressure atop her head of his lips seemed to coax her out of the mournful sorrow she was suddenly hurled into.
Slowly the tears began to dry up and she was able to find her voice again.
“Daddy... Do you think- do you think she would have loved me?”
“She loved you before you were even born.”
“Really?” Kari looked up with swollen eyes and a runny nose.
Loki nodded, “She couldn’t wait to meet you.”
He recalled your constant lack of interest in him as you worried over your growing belly.
“Do you think this is normal?”
You continued to inspect your reflection in the mirror as you stood in front of it with only a towel wrapped around you. It had become a regular occurrence after your bath. Your hands were on your protruding belly but your eyes were on Loki as he approached you from behind.
Loki placed his hands on top of yours not really focusing on your question but on the way you had completely let your guard down. His lips found your bare shoulder to be much more important.
“I doubt there is something I know that you do not my lovely wife.” His lips lightly trailed kisses up along your neck as he continued to whisper loving words into your ear. “But I do know I can hardly keep my hands off you when you are this enticing.”
“Forever the silver-tongued prince...”
“Forever the beautiful vixen who seduced this prince.”
You laughed, “Seriously Loki... do you think she is alright?”
“Do not worry, everything will be fine.”
"Even now she loves you...”
“Really?” He nodded in affirmation but Kari was still unconvinced.
Loki was always known for his lies but he dare not deceive his own daughter. You were a mother who gave her own life for her daughter. Although he couldn’t tell her this now, in the future she would know it.
She would know how you protected her.
She would know how much you loved her...how much you loved them.
She would know of your loving sacrifice.
“Trust me little one.”
-end-
A/N: Sorry for the long unexplained hiatus. In the meantime, I hope you accept this humble offering as an apology for my absence.
