kill your darlings

London Bauer; xxv - ❖ - i love you to the ... b o n e s; your heart has become my h o m e

[youcanletgo]

[london-bauer]

king-of-keyes:

[She’s everything a woman should be. Smart. Fiery. Funny. Looks great with her tits on display. 

She’s hot, obviously. In a dark, can’t-take-me-home-to-your-parents kind of way, which is exactly how he likes it. But she’s also got this fierceness to her, and this quickness about her wit that keeps him interested. And maybe it’s about sex—like, he hardly knows her last name and they’re meeting to sit half-naked in soapy water together—but she also has more of his interest than anyone else he’s flirted with here. Nolan flirts. Oozes sex appeal and innuendo. It’s what he does, because it’s what he does best, but London actually gives him something to compete with. Piques his curiosity in fresh ways. 

And oh, does she look good with her tits out. 

He smirks, as he steps up to the edge of the bath, sinking one foot in at a time onto the first landing. ] A refund? Oh, so you paid for me, did you? I’m just a whore to you?

[His eyes are ‘up there’, as they say, but London’s definitely not looking at them as he climbs slowly into the tub. Deliberately slow, she thinks-- - if he’s not a whore, he’s certainly putting on a good show of being one.]

Can you not just choose to be flattered that I thought you were worth something in the first place, like any normal man would be?

[london-bauer]

lake-valentine:

[The girl doesn’t look like, super impressed with London’s honesty, but hey, it was probably the nicest thing London could have done. Keeping her on the outside of the joke would have been more mean, and strangely it was probably what Lake would have done in the situation. Letting her off the hook would have been more awkward for him then just sticking with the story. 

Uh oh. The love life question. He can already feel himself sweating. But actually, he’s like, glad she asked sorta because she’s the one person he has to talk to about this stuff. Partially because she’s super easy to talk to and she’s always been there for him, and partially because like, his other friends he talks to are maybe sorta involved in this love-life mess and so that conversation would be hella awkward.] 

Oh, it’s still painfully complicated. Like grotesquely complicated. Like Game of Thrones complicated. It’s actually gotten worse since—[Oh God. He hasn’t told her yet. He hasn’t told anyone yet, and he’s really not sure how that happened. He’d have thought he would have run around the colony with balloons and streamers screaming I’M NOT A VIRGIN, I’M NOT A VIRGIN. Maybe he’s grown up a bit. Whoda thunk.]

Oh shit I haven’t told you. I mean, it only happened a little while ago and I haven’t seen you a lot and then everything happened with the NWRF and I guess I… yeah. So Ryder and I like, hooked up. Like hooked up, hooked up. As in he took the card. And then like, recently there’s been this weird thing with someone else when I was like… well it was back a few weeks ago when I was freaking out in the middle of the night because I had that episode? Oh, you would have heard because I was only a few doors over, since I’ve been sleeping in the Torren tower, but yeah, when I was tearing the place apart. Anyway, since then there’s been this strange thing, and I don’t know if it’s a thing because he seems pretty uncomfortable about the whole thing and didn’t want me to lie, misunderstand and stuff. And then I asked Chloe out. On a date. Because she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve seen—no offence, heh— and she’s perfect and I dunno, I really like her and I’m tired of being messed around, you know? Like, I keep like, freaking following these… stupid BOYS around with like, my tail between my legs hoping they’ll explain their FEELINGS to me but oh my God, have you MET boys? Like how have you dated them your whole life? Neither of them are straight with me, pun not intended, and like, I figured fuck it. I don’t know what’s going to happen but like, I’m also not going to wait around like a puppy dog until they figure it out. So I’m being like, a strong independent… man. 

[Lake, only women say that. That’s a women’s phrase. You nitwit.

He shrugs.] I dunno. Just gonna keep like, doing my own thing until one of them figured out what the hell they want form me. And Ryder, like.. well Ryder and I are pretty unique. I dunno what’s gonna happen with him. I don’t regret anything and I still like… I still got the feels and everything, but I think THAT whole situation is gonna take a while to figure out and it’s not like he’s the Virgin Mary or anything so… 

[Whoooooooookay, talk about information overload. As is so often inspired when Lake heads off on one of his verbose rants, London’s face morphs into slackjawed confusion. She feels like they should be drawing up flowcharts to organise this chaos at least a little, but maybe it makes more sense in Lake’s head.

She knew about the Ryder thing, because him and Lake have been sort-of-together-but-sort-of-not for... what, years? A long while, anyway. But this is the first she’s heard of them actually having sex, and although her first reaction is to slap him on the back in congratulations, it doesn’t seem like the moment. Clearly he’s discovered already that sex tends to make things more complicated, not less. And then there’s another guy, and a girl, so no wonder shit’s complicated. Ryder’s always been enough of an enigma by himself, without adding further romantic options into the equation.

Letting out a long breath, London looks at him in something a little like awe.] Well shit, mate. That’s... a lot. How d’you mean the Ryder situation’s gonna take a while to figure out? I know he ain’t the Virgin Mary but, does it bother you that he’s more experienced or whatever? It obviously doesn’t bother him.  [She’s got a lot more questions, really, but with Lake you have to pick one thread and follow it.] 

[london-bauer]

call-corbin:

[ Laughing ] Blimey, yer keen, aren’t ya? Well I could show ya both, obviously. It’s not like my skills are exclusively on the pole. We could start with that if ya want, show ya some moves. Until I see if I can’t blow someone who’ll be able to get us a pole. Or maybe there’s one on the grounds somewhere. In the trainin’ rooms downstairs ya think maybe? Pole dancin’ is good ‘cause it keeps ya hella fuckin’ fit, too. Fuckin’ works the bod like noone’s business. 

Uhh, I don’t think an old school would have a dancing pole just, like, kicking around somehow. But definitely show me some moves, that’d be fucking fun [London nods eagerly, enthused by the idea, and immediately sets off in the direction of the auditiorium.]. So how d’you get into this stuff before? Or is that a personal question? 

[london-bauer]

alexander-donovan:

[ He wonders what ‘sorted out’ means, considering she seems to be referring to something that’s happened post-apocalypse. What exactly did they do for harassed ex-convicts in a world where people are killing each other for scraps of food everyday? The thought leaves a depressing smog in his nose as he inhales slowly, listening to her gently, carefully. He wouldn’t trivialize her safety like that, especially if what she’s getting at is as serious as it sounds, no matter who she is or what she’s done—but the sad thing is he doesn’t have the faith in the Colony or the state of humanity post D-Day to know that everyone else feels the same. 

A nod at the notion of ‘safe’ being obsolete. A tilt of his head. ] On the other side? What do you mean?

I mean, I’m not a great person or nothing, but I ain’t going to side with these neo-Nazis. I got friends with Infections, y’know? And they’re being experimented on. And you know what these people are like, if you ain’t on their side then you’re against them. 

[mirasigar-blog]

Sorry, I don’t understand. People were taken? What does that mean? Who took them? Do they need help searching for them? I’m very good at finding things. Are they sure that they’re missing? Maybe they just got scared when the alarm sounded and hid. Humans often get scared. Maybe everything is fine.

[london-bauer]

...Has anyone ever told you that you should dye your hair blonde? You should. Everything ain’t fine, babes.

[london-bauer]

[london-bauer]

call-corbin:

[ His laugh is spritely, boyish and bright, but he leans forward, hands slipping out of his pockets because the idea almost excites him. ] Wait, wait—okay, well, first of all, bullshite, I got an arse that could kill. Best in this place, easy. Nice try though. 

But why didn’t ya say somethin’ before? This might be the best idea you ever had. Ever. And I ain’t even known ya that long. I should teach ya. How fun would that be? ‘Sides, I dunno if ya know this, but I lock myself in the auditorium sometimes just rememberin’ old routines. I miss it, sorta. Not that I worked on pole routines, because, you know, there ain’t exactly a stripper pole ‘round here…. but I wonder if I could find a way to bring one in off the ships? Hell, what the bloody fuck would they have done with those portable ones, when the world blew up? Use it for construction? [ he laughs ] 

Um, yeah? Mate, that would be so fucking cool. I always wanted to learn to pole dance. Or, like... if there’s no pole, what are we doing? Stripping? I could be down for that. I done ballet when I was younger but it lacked sex appeal, I’d fucking love for you to teach me.

[london-bauer]

lake-valentine:

[For a second he thinks she’s serious, and he’s caught in that awful moment of wondering if HE’S wrong and just made a fool of himself, or if SHE’S just super freaking wrong and he’s going to have to tell a cool girl who’s his friend but he used to have a mega crush on, that she’s like… really, really not right about this. 

But it’s sorta in the way she stares her down, like.. he can almost see the corners of her mouth twitch, and he realizes she’s just being a sarcastic jerk. Lake grins, shaking his head and biting at the back of his knuckles to keep from laughing. His poker face is not so good, but he tries to reign it in with a clear of his throat and a forced cough.]

Ahem. Yeah. Yeah totally. [He nods at the girl solemnly.] Haven’t you ever been on a plane? [He glances as London, throwing her a subtle wink—and just like that it feels like he’s in on the joke and he’s sitting at the cool kids table.] 

[She loves the look on Lake’s face-- - like he belongs, like he’s with family. She’s not sure if he’d be mortified to hear this, but he’s like a brother to her. More than a friend, he’s someone she knows will always be there. And it weighs on her sometimes, that he was so young when D-Day hit; he never got a lot of the normal teenage experiences. Just simple things, like sitting around a library table and ribbing at someone that asked a stupid question.

Taking pity on the poor girl, who looks perplexed by everyone’s snickering, London gives her a serious answer.] 

Nah, we’re just being dicks. You can’t feel earthquakes in an airplane, ‘cause you ain’t touching the ground. [Setting down her pen and stretching her arms out behind her, she turns to Lake.] So, how’s the love life? Last I heard it was, like, painfully complicated.

[london-bauer]

alexander-donovan:

[Something’s upset her. But navigating the emotions of someone who’s been categorized as psychologically unemotional. It’s a messy area of pure greys, and any lines being drawn are presumptuous and deductive. 

And it’s precisely why he avoids reading files, now. So different from his life in the force, where he read every file like homework, a certain kind of study that would determine his effectiveness as an officer of the law. As a so-called peace keeper. 

But things are different now, and though it’s arguable that Alex hasn’t changed all that much, he has adapted, and he believes in those adaptations, despite not having predicted them. 

And the pain in her face reminds him of why. There’s a skittering of fear across her face, like a mouse scampering across tile from sudden light into shadow. Looking for an escape, a hiding place, a piece of darkness that can be construed as safety. 

Safety is hard to come by these days, however. Then again, perhaps it always has been.

Her words trigger something in him, and he looks at her carefully.]

I’m not going to check your records, [he clarifies, to get it out of the way right off the bat.] I believe you and I’m aware you haven’t had incident since being here. I wasn’t asserting that you had. [But it’s the rest that had struck him as concerning, and he takes his time in inquiring about it.] But are you inferring that you’ve had people take the law into their own hands, as you say, against you? Because I don’t give a damn about your history or your record before the Colony—you have the same right to feeling safe here as anyone else. And if someone’s threatened you, that should be addressed. I don’t give a shit about what the NWRF seems to dictate. No one here should ever be a target. That is not what the Colonies were built for. 

[Uh oh, it’s sort of hot when he’s all serious and protector-of-the-people. It actually distracts London from her previous memories for a moment, enough to focus on what he’s actually saying.

Yeah, no one here SHOULD ever be a target. Her own questionable past aside, it seemed beyond stupid that after surviving a near extinction, people could still hurt each other. And London can’t help but feel that if she is able to take the moral high ground over you, you need to take a long, hard look in the mirror.] 

Nah, I mean, it was a thing but it were like, years ago. It got sorted out then, the guy ain’t even here any more. And besides-- - [she adds this bitterly] I don’t think anyone feels ‘safe’ here any more. Maybe I ain’t infected but I’m not on their side, and I’m pretty sure that makes me a sympathiser or something.

[youcanletgo]

[london-bauer]

[So, Nolan is absolutely a rebound interest. A not-quite-Damien. A never-could-be-Jason. If she was actually interested in him, she might have invited him to do something more intellectually stimulating than hot tubbing-- - well, that’s not entirely fair. She’s interested in anyone who’s blinded a man. She likes his ruthlessness, his roughness. He won’t play nice with her.

But frankly, she’s content enough to simply see him with his kit off. London is a simple woman of simple pleasures, and pursuing anything ‘more’ with Nolan would be more complicated than she cares for right now. So, she dons her swimsuit (a slippery, silvery thing that’s a little worn because, like everything, its second hand), and sinks into the bubbles to see if he’ll turn up. She isn’t even certain he will; but then he is there, trunks clinging to his body in a way that London finds, honestly, indecent.]

...In my head you were wearing speedos, so I’m not going to lie, this is disappointing. Can I get a refund?

@king-of-keyes

[lake-valentine]

I’m sorry, you—what? 

[Oh sweet Mary and Joseph and little baby J, he does not have the patience for ANYTHING today. He has a headache and it is not being made any better by listening to girls ask questions like CAN YOU FEEL AN EARTHQUAKE IN AN AIRPLANE.] 

[london-bauer]

[London glances up from her homework (Russian, which she’s kept up despite Damien’s departure), brow furrowed at the absurdity of the question. For a moment, Lake is the only one in the library that responds in any way. Does... does this girl ever think before she opens her mouth?] 

Um, duh, what do you think turbulence is? The vibrations travel up the air from the ground and shake the airplane. That’s, like, kiddy knowledge. [London stares her down, daring her not to sense the sarcasm.]

[london-bauer]

bear-little-loss:

[On her elongated ‘uhhh’ he looks at her and sees an expression he hadn’t anticipated. Suddenly, as he gazes into her cloud-like grey eyes, lined with charcoal and coal, he has this funny feeling of being at the cafeteria table with that weird girl who only wears black and the cool kids warn to stay away from. 

He’d always been at one of those tables too, until Joel had changed things, that is. Thing is, he’d always been alone at that table. It’s almost surreal, for a moment, as if separate words in separate parallel universes are colliding in some post apocalyptic sci fi game. 

He doesn’t know what to say, at first, and he has to blink to declutter what she’s saying to him.]

What? [It hits him, and he feels brief horror.] Because they were part of the clan that kicked me out, [he replies in a burst.] Before the Colony found me. Nothing—nothing weird.

[Is he protesting too much? London can’t tell. She’s not sure why she’s decided he’s at risk of killing her, because frankly she’s probably got more intimidating enemies out there. The Deluded have always freaked her out a bit though, because they view the world through different eyes and it makes their moral codes a shadowy thing.] 

Oh, whoa, they kicked you out? That must have been a whole... thing. Like, ha ha, why would you kick someone out of your group? So weird, they must’ve thought you did... something?

[Yeah, he totally slaughtered them.]

[london-bauer]

call-corbin:

[He lets out a loose laugh. He’s almost forgotten how refreshing she is.] Oh so you’re a, what is it, mormon ex-convict now? Is that the one they don’t believe in dancing and shite like that? But whatever, goth-barbie, you just don’t wanna see me dance incase it makes ya too hot fer me. 

Actually, to tell the truth, I’m just salty because you never offered me pole dancing lessons. I can only assume it’s ‘cause you know my arse is better than yours.

[call-corbin]

Alright. We needs some tunes up in this joint or some shit. Startin’ to lose my bloody mind. 

[london-bauer]

Corbin Ealy, we discussed this, you stay off that pole. Music is only going to encourage you in your infidel, sinning ways. [She almost sounds like she could be serious, but the glint in her eye gives her away as it is wont to do.]

[simonandvictorsittingonatree]

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[london-bauer]

Since you've gone I've been lost without a trace I dream at night, I can only see your face I look around but it's you I can't replace I feel so cold and I long for your embrace I keep crying, "Baby, baby, please"