Freya Ravenwood

Behind the smile is a hurting heart

[lonelyfreya-blog]

Do you like girls?

Yes! I do like girls, I’m drawn to both genders. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

To my dear muns,

To anyone who took offense to my responses on Freya’s account, that was not my intention. I am sorry if I offended you. My use of language was not meant in any way, shape or form to imply a negative view of any group of people. The original post has been altered and the following response has been removed. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

what's one thing on your bucket list?

If I didn’t get to do everything on my bucket list, the one thing I hope I get to do…

….is to find a love like the one I lost….as sappy as that may be. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylon-the-ta:

“Ok,” he mumbled from his place still on the wall. His eyes were open until she shut the door, then he closed them for a few minutes. Bray stayed almost frozen in that position until the water got cold, even them it took him a little bit to convince himself to move. While he drained the water he stayed in the tub and once it was empty he pulled himself to sit on the edge of the tub again. That’s when he spotted the towel left out for him, which he slowly used to wipe himself down and struggle to put around his waist. Once he had, he called softly, “Freya…I-uh-need your help.”

Freya went to put her little tea kettle on, feeling a warm cup of Earl Grey would sooth her nerves. It was strange, seeing Braylon in such pain. Still, her image of him didn’t change. He was still this guy who was easy to talk to, with piercing blue eyes and a strong- well everything. He was strong, even stronger than Rocket. As her mind began to wonder, her body went on autopilot. Grabbing a cup and preparing it for her tea before pouring in the ready water. As her tea steeped, she grabbed a stack of clothes from the bottom drawer of her dresser. “They are so much alike, and yet so different. A good different. Where one was weaker, the other prevails.” Freya thought to herself as she looked at the picture of Rocket on her table. Both had the same style, same demeanor and even the same addiction. It was nice to see what Rocket might have been if he were able to overcome his demons. Finally, the sound of Braylon’s voice broke her of her trance. Shaking it off, she made her way back to him. “How are you feeling?” She asked, with a small smile. Her eyes hopeful that her idea had helped. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylon-the-ta:

Bray was more than slightly embarrassed when she had to help him. Especially when she pulled both bottom layers off. “I was going to get in, in my boxers,” he mumbled with his arms still slightly above his head. They fell back to his sides slowly before he tried to swing his legs over the side of the bath. He paused at her question, “No, not really, but it doesn’t matter,” then he used her arms to lower himself into the water. Once he was settled, with his legs curled up a bit, he leaned his head on the wall, looking away from her. It left his back open for display, with it’s myriad of scars, but for once he couldn’t be bothered to care.

Freya couldn’t help the burn come to her cheeks, slightly embarrassed. “Sorry, I just- wanted you to be comfortable. Your clothes are sweatier than you think. Probably just a normal reaction to the pain you’re in.” She turned and walked to the door frame before turning to face him. The scene was so familiar and yet so different. At least he could try to relax a bit. She couldn’t help the small smile, that peeked at the corner of her mouth at catching sight of the scars. There was something beautiful about them, even though she was sure they had a horrible background. A part of her wanted to trace them with the tips of her fingers. Her eyes must have reflected the sadness she felt, and she looked hoping he didn’t catch it. “I have some clothes that I think will fit you when you want to get out. I’m going to put a kettle on. Just yell if you need anything.” 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

What do you want to know? 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

penrosejackson:

Being raised in isolation had ensured that comfort was not Pen’s strong suit, and so far her efforts to help the suffering people she’d seen here had not gone well. So, when she saw a girl sitting on a bench outside alone, she made sure to give the girl a wide berth. Penrose’s excuse for leaving the school today was losing her lighter. She was hoping it had fallen out of her pocket so that she wouldn’t have to deal with another thief in her school, and as she glanced over at the girl talking to herself on the bench, Penrose saw a tell-tale glint of orange in the grass. Right in front of the bench.

She awkwardly made her way over to the girl, who looked Not Thrilled to have company. Penrose grimaced, and held up the lighter. “Sorry. I promise I wasn’t eavesdropping. I just lost this.”

Freya blinked a few times, making the slightly blurry vision clear slightly. She gave the girl a smile, trying to hide the sadness that seemed to come to the surface today. “No worries. I was just enjoying the outside.” Seeing the lighter in her hand, she reached into her bag. “Glad you found that, would you mind helping out someone with a light?” She asked holding up her pack of cigarettes. 

[inboxstuff]

On anon, tell me what your muse thinks of mine and they’ll try to guess who it is!

[internalbroken]

[lonelyfreya-blog]

“This is hell, this is hell You're looking and whispering You think I'm someone else This is hell, yes. Literal hell. “

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

Bray only looked up at her question and nodded. “ Think so,” the vest came off with relative ease, as did the shirt. Both of which he folded and put on the floor. His belt ended up hitting the ground with a soft clink, and instead of trying to tackle his pants just yet, he bent at the waist and pulled his shoes off. After that, he needed a minute to recuperate. Bray sat there for a minute as he undid the fly and button of his jeans, he just wasn’t sure how else he’d get the rest off, “I think I’m stuck,” he mumbled.

“Okay.” She said before pointing to the door. “I’ll just be right outside.” She turned and slid just around the doorway to give him privacy. She could hear the shuffling of him removing his clothes and the click of the belt hitting the floor. After a moment, she listened to hear him break the surface of the water but it didn’t come. Instead, she heard him mumble for help. Turning the corner again, she inhaled quietly. She wasn’t expecting to be taken back so much by seeing him half naked. Still, she moved towards him as if it were normal and knelt by his side. “On the count of three, lift yourself with your arms.” She looked up to the ceiling, and grabbed a hold of the ridge of his jeans. She was going to make this as quick, painless and not awkward as possible. “One, two three.” Carefully, and swiftly she managed to pull his jeans and boxers down around his waist. Her hands trailing down his legs to grab the ends of the pant legs and pulled out. It hadn’t been the first time she had to undress someone completely without looking. “Are you good?” She asked, her body slightly turned away from him, folding up his pants to keep her hands from shaking. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

While she helped him up, he bit down on his lip, hard. Standing on his own feet sent shockwaves through his legs and with each wave he held onto her a little tighter. In any other situation, he’d feel bad because he was possibly going to leave bruises, but he couldn’t form the words for an apology. When she set him down on the edge of the tub, he looked around in complete confusion. Maybe it had been all the effort it took to get there, but he couldn’t recall the journey. “I just…anything, at this point,” he mumbled with the heels of his hands against his eyes, “I’d take a frying pan to the head right now.”

Freya just wanted to roll her head and stretch ever part he grasped, but she knew there would be time for that later. Despite the bruises that were already showing up under her shirt, she knew that wasn’t going to be the worst of this. Taking a deep breath she looked at him and stood. “Can you undress yourself?” She asked hoping he would be able to. She considered Braylon a good friend, and one of the only ones she had at the academy, but they weren’t exactly close enough for that. Still she would do what needed to be done and respectfully. Growing up in the medical field, she knew she would be able to hold her composure. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

“I don’t remember walking,” he murmured as he noticed her gaze and in truth he hadn’t. The pain had started around five minutes ago and the onset had been sudden. Maybe he’d been standing? Regardless it wouldn’t be the first time a student stole his wheelchair. “Don’t have a car. It was totaled in the accident and I haven’t gotten another. Unless Jace or Sophie are here…I can’t…” he swallowed hard. “Please, just help.”

“Come on.” She said making a decision for him. It didn’t matter anymore if it might have been weird, she needed to do something. As carefully as she could, she helped him make their way to her dorm. She wasn’t sure how long it actually took them, even though it felt like a lifetime. It was a little strange, being so close to him. Her skin burned where he held on, his grip clutching as tightly as he could. At last, they made it to the door that was familiar to Freya. In almost one motion, she unlocked the door and pushed it open to lead him to the bathroom. The weight was relived as she sat him down on the seat of the toilet and started a bath. It was calming, the feeling of the water rushing over her fingertips as it changed temperature. “I’m hoping this works for you as well as it’s worked before in the past. Anything is better than nothing at this point.” She said turning to look at him. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

“It’s ok,” he waved off before fisting his hand again. Slowly he leaned mostly against the wall to stand as he looked around for his wheelchair. He didn’t know why it wasn’t there and how he got here in the first place. “I don’t know…I can’t get home without my wheelchair and…maybe the nurse?” Bray’s mind was a little fuzzy at this point and he started to have tunnel vision. He blinked back the pain and looked at her, “What’s your idea?”

Freya followed his gaze, holding him as much as she could. Her eyebrows furrowed realizing the wheelchair wasn’t around. Had he really walked so far without it? Looking in his eyes, her head started to shake. She had no clue. It wasn’t as if her small bathroom would be comfortable for him. “Uh-” Words seemed to get stuck in her throat. “I can drive you if you even have a car, which I doubt due to your current condition.” She knew she wasn’t supposed to leave the grounds, but at this point she would take the consequences if it meant Braylon was okay. “I have a small bathroom with a small tub, shower thing you might be able to sit in, and it’s not too far....I don’t think the school has like a heated pool or anything.” Looking in his eyes, she could see how miserable he was. “I’m sorry, I know my suggestions aren’t the best.” 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

It took a few minutes but eventually, his legs began to relax. Every once in awhile they’d twitch and he’d groan, but it was becoming less and less. He tried to focus on her words which were also helping. “I don’t know who Rocket it,” he murmured, his head falling back against the wall but this time gently. “Can’t take…those kinds of drugs either. If they test me…I have…issues,” addition was a big problem for him, even if he couldn’t technically get addicted to weed. Taking a few deep breaths, he nodded, “Alright…let’s go.”

“Sorry, I forget that people don’t know him.” She said quietly, her eyes snapping away from him. Nodding her head, she stayed optimistic. Not being able to take any kind of pain killer was going to make the process a bit harder, but it wasn’t impossible. “Where to?” She asked helping him up. She shifted herself so most of his weight was on her. “I know I’m small, but I have nine older brothers and three older sisters and I promise I’m stronger than I look, so don’t worry about crushing me.” She gave a small chuckle. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

Unconsciously Bray was whimpering under his breath. The grip on his leg was only making the pain worse and quickly he switched his grip to his other arm. His problem there was that he was gripping so tightly he was nearly drawing blood. “I’m trying but I just can’t,” he shook his head a few too many times and gave himself a bit of vertigo. “What are you-?” Bray meant to ask what she was doing but his words were swallowed by another louder whimper.

Freya worked slowly, compressing his muscles to try to subside the pain even slightly. With every whimper, her heart grew heavy. “Braylon look at me.” She said trying to get his attention. “I know it hurts, I know it’s hard, but you can do it.” She switched to his other leg for a while before going back and forth. “I’m trying to help the only way I know how. I used to have to help Rocket with pain like this. If you can focus on the compression and try to block out the pain I can help you get to a tub you can soak in. I also have edibles that might help numb the pain since I know you don’t like medications, but before I can get them I have to know you are going to be okay and in less pain.” 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

braylontheta:

With a soft thud, Bray whacked his head back against the wall. It hurt, yes, but at least it was a distraction from the pain in his legs. “It hurts,” he murmured brokenly. “They told me the nerve damage would flare up the more I walked, but I didn’t realize how much it would hurt,” his eyes screwed shut as his nails dug into his legs.

Freya looked over the boy. She hated seeing him in such agony. Instantly her mind started to search for solutions. Surely he wasn’t able to get to a place to soak in warm water, and her edibles were back at her dorm which was to far to run to and return in a timely manner. “Okay, just try to relax. We will get this under control.” Carefully, and with a slight hesitance, she wrapped her hands around his calf and gently started to massage it. She remembered having to do it to Rocket through the days he was having withdrawals. 

[lonelyfreya-blog]

You're attracted to Braylon

True or False game

True. Braylon is easy to talk to, and I can say I am attracted to him physically and mentally. I don’t let my attraction get in the way of simply trying to be his friend.