erase＆rewrite

xavien syne ; twenty-two, 115th victor

[longsyne]

saph-wolf​:

“Look, I’m not dancing with you, or anyone, because I don’t dance, it’s just not a thing that’s going to happen, alright?” she hoped she was clearer this time, because if he kept asking, she’d end up feeling bad, and Sapphire didn’t like feeling bad. 

“oh. okay,” he said, trying to hide his disappointment, maybe a bit of embarrassment as well. and maybe he should have expected this considering the harrowing mood that was cast over the entire night, but maybe he just thought doing something that used to come so easily to him would make any of this better, and doing that with someone else was less daunting. “well. that’s totally okay! we can just sit here and.. drink champagne all night? if you want to, that is?” 

[longsyne]

asher-hartley​:

“You know you’re not the first person to ask me to dance tonight, and I’m starting to worry you might be the last,” Asher said, turning towards the younger Victor. “But fine, yes, you’re lucky I brought my dancing shoes with me tonight.” And he’d had his glass of whiskey, so he was feeling a bit loose, a bit more like the self who used to love to dance at these types of parties.

the start of the man’s answer had his stomach twisting, figuring it was the start of a blatant ‘no’ thrown in his face and that that would be the harsh end of his attempt at that for the night. and so when it turned out that asher had accepted his offer, he couldn’t stop his face from lighting up and instantly standing up a little taller. “really?!” he let out with raised eyebrows before he could contain his excitement about something that surely wasn’t that big a deal. “i mean, of course you do. do we need to go get your dancing shoes or— or are you wearing them? you’re probably wearing them, i mean. that would make sense, wouldn’t it?” 

[longsyne]

finis-ccronat-opus​:

“It’s…” She shifted her gaze up towards the ceilings that she knew resided dozens of feet underground. “It’s stifling.” Perhaps the most honest answer she had given that night. She wasn’t keen on the knowledge she was so far underground, or that there were so many people in a bunker, or that someone had been killed not to long ago - rebel or not. 

xavien turned his head back and forth, taking quick looks around the ballroom as if examining it with her statement in mind. “the underground thing’s kinda.. a lot, isn’t it?? it’s not too bad though! i mean.. at least they didn’t throw us in the broken down tower, i think that would have been a disaster,” he tried to offer with a slight chuckle, that he felt bad letting out, like that could be any worse than what they’d witnessed today. he figured either way it would have happened though, the location was just an insignificant detail to him. “it sucks that it’s all gotta be for your ball, though..”

[longsyne]

saph-wolf​:

Saph turned quickly, ready to tell off whoever was behind her for touching her. She actually felt bad though, when he spoke. “It is weird” she pointed out, and she wondered what went on in his head to think that she was somehow approachable. “I don’t dance, not unless I’ve had at least another bottle of champagne”

“i don’t really dance, either. so at least it’d be weird for the the both of us??” truthfully, he wasn’t really sure why he’d asked saph of all people to dance with him. she was the kind of person that’d he’d normally avoid, but tonight was the night of doing things he didn’t usually do, this included. “i’ll go first if it helps. maybe you’ll have a better time tonight if you dance??” 

[finis-ccronat-opus]

After only an hour or two, Nvidia found herself tucked away in the back corner. She was done with socializing, done with the continuous questions about her arena or her experience, how she was doing since. She honestly didn’t know what to say. That she felt fine? Fine, except the tightness in her calf that still caused a small limp. If Lysander’s disappointment at not scarring her for life was anything to go off of, she was worried about how other’s would act. Other’s who weren’t fine. But was she really fine? She didn’t think she should be fine. Shouldn’t she feel more? It’d been the question she had struggled with for the past three months. She should feel more remorseful, should feel some sort of grief for the lives lost so she could be here. 

But she couldn’t. And she judged herself, looking from the outside in, she judged herself on the basis that she should feel something. That was natural. Her apathy was not. If she looked from the outside in, watching herself with a stranger’s gaze, she could judge herself, yes. But she could also pretend that she was not herself. That she was someone else. Someone that reacted to trauma normally. Someone that lacked the apathy that lurked in her mind. 

And that’s where she was, in a corner, judging herself, frown painted across her face, when someone approached and spoke to her. She was forced to come back to herself then, forced to reinhabit her own apathetic self. She smiled, though it did not look genuine. 

“I’m sorry, it’s awfully loud in here, what did you say?”

[longsyne]

“oh, no worries,” xavien hadn’t said anything, but for three’s newest victor, he could at least play it off that he had. he’d went off to look for nvidia when the ball had reached it’s peak— even with the past events of the last few months and what they witnessed just this morning, people still managed to make this ball just as grand and celebratory as any other ball he’d been to. it was comforting in a sense, this idea that they could continue to be fine like this and live on, just as long as they didn’t step out of line. but it was also eerie how much they’d seen no one was quite safe, including victors new and old alike. he couldn’t be sure, but he doubted the turmoil was helping their newest victor settle in comfortably. 

“i was just asking how you liked it here, in thirteen. it’s a lot different from three— well, a lot different from everywhere else in panem,” he asked with a light smile, speaking up over the music filling the ballroom. 

[longsyne]

the best medicine was ignorance, right? i mean, it was hard to ignore their location, but this was the same as it always was, wasn’t it? a victor’s ball was a victor’s ball, no matter the place. it shouldn’t of mattered, but it did. this wasn’t the same, and that urged him on to do something he never did. he tapped someone’s shoulder, waiting for a second before asking, “excuse me— sorry if this is weird, but do you wanna dance with me?” 

[longsyne]

Everett, Cade, Abel

"this game sucks. marry cade because i wouldn't want to turn down his marriage proposal, fuck everett, and kill abel because i feel like he wouldn't be mad at me if i did."

[longsyne]

fmk yuri yuri yuri

"...well i mean you kinda already chose for me, didn't you?" pause. "kill yuri."

[longsyne]

district-four-mentor​:

Rodrick nodded his head “Second breakfast is a good idea, maybe it will help my nerves.” He said before following the young victor from three over towards the elevator. “-normally, I have food delivered to the fourth floor. I used to go to cafes a lot more however, but it’s been a while…”

Rodrick raised an eyebrow, turning to the young man as they neared the elevator. The tall man reached forward and pressed the button before speaking “Are you afraid of me or something?” he said maintaining his stoic expression the entire time. He realized that he never spoke all too much with Xavien, but given that there was almost two decades between their games and they were from different districts it wasn’t much of a shock that they mostly had short conversations here and there.

xavien smiled brightly, and it was as much of a indicator for him to relax as it was to show rodrick that he was relaxed too. they’d left the viewing room to get him out of a stressful situation, xavien didn’t need to bring him right back into one. “ordering food up is nice,” he lamented, stepping into the elevator. “but going down for food is too. sometimes when i’m nervous, i feel like i can’t eat. but smelling all the foods down there, it helps bring back your appetite, don’t you think?” 

“scared of you??” xavien sputtered out almost instinctively, as though he was nervous the sentiment would upset rodrick, would sully any merit he’d managed to build up in this new interaction alone. and it wasn’t as though he was scared of rodrick, at least on any sort of personal level. it was just that xavien was afraid of just about anyone with power, influence. sure, they were both victors, but rodrick was older, held more respect in that aspect alone. and xavien felt like an impostor of a victor on any given day. so he was afraid; afraid he’d get seen right through for what he was — a fake. “no. no, i’m not afraid of you, you’re a good guy, rodrick,” he fumbled through the weak argument, his hand holding onto the elevator railing to steady himself as they descended. “why would i be?” 

[longsyne]

district-four-mentor​:

Rodrick had no wish or want to stay in the observatory room, to watch all the screens which were slowly torturing him. The only reason he even bothered watching anymore, wasn’t for his own tributes but for the tributes of friends… He wanted to help the right people survive. If he was going to invest time and money in anyone. It was just so damned hard…

Rodrick couldn’t help but chuckle at the younger man’s questions as they made their way out, thinking that it was nice regardless of it’s strange nature “-I had some coffee and toast for breakfast, but not much.” Actually, if anything food might actually help… Maybe? It sounded like something Rodrick’s mother would recommend. 

xavien’s eyebrows rose at rodrick’s response, visibly lightening up. “oh! that’s good! well, that’s not good, but i was going ask you if you wanted to get something for lunch down in the lobby?? there’s a new sandwich at the cafe that i wanted to try, but i haven’t gotten around to it yet..” he mumbled cautiously, wide eyed as though he was expecting rodrick to turn down his offer. “but if you’re not hungry, you could have more coffee instead! they’ve got that there, too.” it was a cafe. of course they had that there. xavien sighed lightly. 

[longsyne]

district-four-mentor​:

The older mentor didn’t typically loose his cool in public, it was odd to see the normally cool and composed Rodrick Longfellow in distress. However, these games were taking an especially big toll on Rod, considering their likeness to his own so many years ago.

When he heard the kind voice inviting him away, Rodrick turned his gaze from his palms up to Xavien. His exhale was shaky, but the man stood up tall and proud to accompany the young man. “Sure thing…” He agreed shoving his pale hands back into his pockets. He remained quiet as they walked away from the screens, his blue eyes staring down at the ground s they moved.

xavien smiled widely at rodrick’s willingness to get away from all the screens in the viewing room, walking alongside him in silence until they’d made it out of the room, the silence of the hallway making him realize how loud it had been in there. 

he’d wanted to ask the man how he was without making him have to talk about the games. “um. how—” he cut himself off. god, why was he so bad at this?? “have you eaten today? not that you look like you haven’t or anything, just. just wondering.” he groaned inwardly, cursing himself for always getting awkward in situations like this. 

[district-four-mentor]

Between the drinking, smoking and long sleepless nights; Rodrick was starting to feel as though he was loosing his mind. Every time he looked at a screen to examine what was going on, he’d hear familiar sounds of the jungle and then screams of a time long gone…

“None of it is real… It’s not real.” He repeated to himself, before taking a seat in the viewing room and then burring his head in his hands. Some may have taken the action as merely frustration or stress, but those who knew Rodrick for any amount of time may have recognized the action as distress.

Rodrick’s games had been in a similar tropical jungle local, and the non-stop viewing of the current games’ tropical jungle was testing his sanity.

[longsyne]

xavien had felt the distress radiate off rodrick, he’d felt it too before, after all. it had been short lived for what it was, but between his victory, leaving three permanently and his mother’s death, he found easier to sleep, sleep most of the day away. so it faded away, mostly. it was years ago, but he could see it. “hey,” he said, shifting around in his seat so rodrick would maybe look at him. “rodrick. do you wanna go down to the lobby with me??” 

[longsyne]

yurihuxley​:

“xav, you’re overreacting !! i’m not dead, nor dying, and you are not my mom,” yuri said then, pointed a finger accusingly. it was the hand xavien grabbed onto, and yuri rather felt that he held no leverage in this situation at all. like he might actually end up going to the hospital, as xavien insisted. “it was just a backflip gone wrong, xav !! nothing i haven’t dealt with before !! i want to stay here, i want to dance more. i want to dance with you.”

xavien stopped in his tracks, letting go of yuri’s hand and facing him. “yuri, you know i don’t dance anymore,” he stated like there was nothing more to say on the matter, his eyes focused on the dried blood on yuri’s forehead, if nothing but to avoid his eyes. “are you really sure you’re okay because you could seriously have a concussion if you landed on your head— where are we? what year is it? whats my name?” he asked in quick succession, trying to test yuri on this. 

[longsyne]

chip-foster​:​​

“Wh-Whose car we you going in? I-I’m not putting a dead body in my car.”

“chip, you’re not taking me seriously, i am being deathly serious,” he said, pushing off the table to sit up. “where’s all the food?? aren’t you hungry?” 

[satchel-mcqueen]

“I…” Satchel looked down at the floor, which was far away, and on which he could just see his fork. Only a second ago, it had been in his hand. Now, he was lucky it hadn’t hit anyone in the head on its descent. “I dropped my fork.” He looked at the person next to him with slight surprise and confusion on his face, unsure what to do now. His salad fork had already been taken, and how was he supposed to eat salmon with a spoon?

@ashchane​ @santos-emilia​ @longsyne​

[longsyne]

xavien had watched it happen, but when satchel had turned to him and actually announced it, it felt like he finally had permission to laugh about it. “don’t.. don’t stress about it!” he tried to say through little chuckles, having to start over in the beginning. “you can share with me! that’s not too gross, is it?” 

[longsyne]

asher-hartley​:​

He frowned. “What’s your proof?” he asked, because he actually wouldn’t be surprised if it was true, but the boy looked like a bit of a lightweight as it was. “Is it making you feel a little woozy? Then it’s doing its job. That shit’s too damn fruity anyway, it’ll make you sick even without spiking.”

“yeah. my head hurts. and everything spinning. your face looks all.. blurry,” he furrowed his eyebrows, trying to get a better look at the man. “why do you seem so.. fine, then? are you some sort of wizard or something?” 

[longsyne]

skyxhartley​:​

Sky was staying at the bar for the most of the night. She was downing drinks, she was drinking them quite slowly, but she just enjoyed sitting at the bar. As some spoke to her, Sky looked over at him and smiled. “Um.” She started before looking at her golden watch on her wrist. “Looks like it’s 10:45.” Sky told him before looking back up. “Is it passed your bedtime?” The girl let out a laugh. It was quite obvious how tired he was.

she laughed but she was right. he’d usually be in bed by ten, asleep fifteen minutes later, it was a habit since early morning dance practices that he never really unlearned. “yeah, yeah, it really is,” he almost pouted, letting out a little sigh as he pushed himself to sit up at the bar. “do you think it’s too early to leave?? i don’t want to leave. are you tired?”