Unsaid || f2f: Lorcis
Soo.. [Okay, what was he going to say, again? He forgot all the things he had made up in his mind. Perfect, he thought. He had to think again to find right words to explain his feelings. But it was hard, harder than all of his exams. That was the moment that he realized not everything was about exams, and that was the moment that he realized if he took out the studies, nothing was left. Except, Lorcan. There was two things that described him perfectly. Being clever and Lorcan. That was all about him.] You must have already realized this if you are not stupid but.. Well, I know I’m always teasing you, but I never said what I feel about you properly. We’ve been friends since like from the beginning and honestly I have no idea that what would I do without you. You are my best friend, but not just best friend. You are special to me, apart from everyone. I have this weird feeling when I’m around you. And I always tried to cover it with teasing you. I realized that was so stupid, I thought it would destroy our friendship if I told you this. But nothing can destroy it. If you don’t feel the way I feel about you, that is okay. We’ll just pretend that this talk is never happened. But if it is the other way around, I can tell you rightly that I love you. [That was crazy, he was even sure that he blushed, feeling already ashamed was bad for him. And waiting Lorcan’s answer, it was deathlike. But on the other side, he felt relieved. There was no hiding things anymore. At least, Lorcan would know how Louis felt about him. Not taking his eyes away, Louis kept looking at Lorcan straightly. Analyzing his mimics to understand what Lorcan was thinking.]
[Lorcan’s heart felt heavy as he saw Louis putting on his serious face for the first time after a long time. Lorcan straightened up a bit as what he would be hearing soon was probably a big deal, he wanted to make sure he was ready for whatever it was. He didn’t want to think of someone having been hurt, that would cause him to shake, that was the last thing he needed. He thought he should choose being optimistic this time, he took a deep breath then he felt ready.] I – I don’t quite understand. [He stopped for a minute to process all these things Louis said. Yes, he wasn’t stupid, he was aware of all the flirting of Louis’, but that never meant something exclusive to him, it was Louis, he’d pretty much flirt with anyone he liked. He was taken aback but somehow, he believed him. He could sense it from the intense look in Louis’ eyes, that look wasn’t something Lorcan often witnessed to yet he could recognize it easily. He had no idea what to feel let alone what to say. But as he saw Louis growing impatient and anxious, he just felt obliged to say something to free him from the pain.] You see, I wasn’t expecting this at all. You are quite a joker so that just might be one of your plays. But I don’t think so, do you know why? Because, If this wasn’t the truth and you wanted to fool me, you would have done it years ago, I know you would. And, as for how I feel about you, it is complicated. It really is. I’ve never felt these things towards anyone other than you so I’m not sure what to call them. These are new feelings for me that I’m still trying to get used to. I suppose that applies to both of us. [Lorcan had difficulty in grasping the fact that this was actually happening. He felt like he said too much so he thought it’d be better if he took a break, let the words sink in.]













