Pairing: Kylo x Reader, Poe x Reader.
Warnings: An abusive relationship so if its a trigger for you consider not reading, angst and maybe some tears.
Opening his eyes Kylo looked at his surrounds and saw the hour on his clock on the nightstand. 05:20 AM.
Grunting he sat and rubbed his face, another day where he would spend tired. Looking at his large window he saw the lights over the other buildings.
His apartment was in the penthouse of a known building in the city. He was CEO of his uncle’s firm and money wasn’t an issue.
Deciding to start his day he took a hot shower to fix his thoughts and went for a run. It would be nice to watch the sunrise.
Back at his place he took another shower and walked to his closet to chose his suit for the day.
Choosing some normal black and white one he stepped on his oxfords and grabbed his suitcase. Walking to the garage he felt something rubbing on his pants pockets, clicking the lock button and unlocking his car he touched his pocket finding a small paper.
Just to remind you of me. I love you, Kylo. ♡
Your handwriting perfectly wrote with a heart followed. Kylo’s lips almost smiled but he frowned and threw the paper at the back seat of his car. He hadn’t time for that.
You woke up thanks to Kylo’s annoying alarm. It was 7 AM and you just wanted to sleep. “Kylo can you please turn it off!” You exclaimed.
Laughing Kylo did so and moved so he could grasp you with his arms. “I love how grumpy you are.”
“Okay, praise me later it’s too early.”
“Is never too early.” He answered kissing a sweet kiss on your lips.
People would never expect Kylo to be romantic, but what mattered was what happened between you two.
“Come, let’s get ready and I’ll let you at your work.” He stated and kissed your bareback before pulling the sheets out of you making you grunt and get up.
You were almost ready when Kylo was finishing putting his papers in order inside the suitcase. Smiling you grabbed a paper and wrote a small message down. Kylo would probably have a busy day and you hoped it would make him at least smile.
As you thought the day was busy, a few associates and partners where Kylo wish he could fire - but Luke didn’t allow so and would always start his speech saying it was his empire and blah blah - didn’t agree with Kylo’s project, Kylo was already tired.
Finishing some contracts he rolled his eyes when his pattern Hux found a problem at Kylo’s sketch.
It was always like that, Kylo created something, the associated would approve, but Hux would find a flaw.
After the long meeting and finally finding something Luke and Hux agreed with, Kylo sat at his desk seeing some financials documents on his computer, darting his eyes to his watch he saw the black and white photo aside his computer. Kylo smiled and grabbed the frame with his large hands, tracing his finger on your face he wondered how someone so good would be doing with him.
Remembering your complains about the late hours he had been working he decided to go home and grab something to make a dinner for you too, searching the car keys he touched a paper and wondered what was it, probably some claim check, it was a small message you wrote for him, Kylo smiled and went home ready to spend some quality time.
Gruting Kylo drove faster to his job, he had large meetings today and couldn’t be distracted by something that ended a long time ago.
His day went rather normal, Luke asked some file Kylo had saved in one of the boxes on his shelves. Searching for it he saw a picture fallen in the floor, it was you and him on the second anniversary you two shared. Kylo didn’t like photos but his smile was huge in the picture, it was a great day.
Eating breakfast you looked Kylo by your side reading the newspaper. “A whole year with you, how did I manage that?” You teased and Kylo laughed at the words, he knew he wasn’t the easiest person to be around. “I’m joking you know, I love you.”
Kylo placed the newspaper down and moved his chair pulling your arm. “And I love you.” You sat on his lap and kissed him gently. “Tonight we will have a nice dinner.” He proposed and caressed his large hand on your shoulder. “Maybe watch some movie at that drive-in cinema you love so much,” His hand went down your arm. “And then we come back here, have some fun.” Grabbing your waist he pulled your lips near.
You smiled at the kiss, happy about the idea, he hated cinema due to the people that would be there, his flat tv was almost a size of one of a cinema and he had money enough to buy the new movies, so the thought of going just to make you happy made you smile.
The day gladly passed fast at your job and soon enough you were at home dressing a new dress Kylo bought you.
The dinner was at the most luscious restaurant on the city, Kylo knew you would be by his side didn’t matter if it was on an expensive dinner or a simple pizza at the street corner, and he loved it.
The movie was the old On the Waterfront and Kylo managed to park his black Range Rover in the best spot to watch the screen. At home, well, moans, curses, and love statements would surely heard by the annoying rich neighbors down the level of the building.
Kylo hated to admit, but he missed you. The fact that his uncle, father, and mother keeps talking about you didn’t help much.
His apartment seemed boring with the modern structure. His closet only filled with dark colored clothes, his feeding was only around proteins and beer. Everything was too boring, tasteless.
He knows he messed up, he knows that he failed to fill his promise of loving and respecting you, that he took you for granted and he regrets it.
And what pissed him off the most is that you moved on, adversely than him that tried to find solace in wild nights in clubs, you found someone else. Kylo would respect that you had sex with other people, he did too. But it wasn’t that, you found someone new, someone better.
Poe Dameron was the one, of course it was. Poe lived in Kylo’s neighborhood while kids, they were friends but as the teenage years came Kylo started to ignore Poe due the jealousy Kylo felt. Kylo Ren is smart, clever, skilled and entered on his uncle’s empire managing to bring more fortune and accomplishments, but his parents would always look at the man who the wish while a kid was to fly.
Leia works in the council and it’s an important general, and Poe works for the government service pilot managing to be near her. Han used to fly too and that is how he met Leia. Another reason why Han liked Poe Dameron so much, for Kylo’s dismay.
Kylo understand that even if you started to date someone that he had never even heard of he would still be pissed, but Poe Dameron? Kylo felt attached. He felt like you did it to hurt him directly.
Kylo was terrible, today it made exactly fifteen days you two broke up, that Kylo loved you wasn’t something freshly, he knew it. But that he couldn’t live without you? That was new.
Kylo knows he has the tendency to push people away, but after you two started to date his insecurities and bad temper started to slow down, you calmed him and definitely made him a better person. The two years and five months you two dated was perfect, you were so good and bright. Even on the days you felt ugly, angry, depressed Kylo still saw you as the most bright angel that fell on his lap.
He needed to see you again, he needed to talk to you and apologize. He wanted to send you flowers but he had no idea where you were. He wanted to talk but you had blocked his number. He even went to your work and searched for you, but you weren’t there. He gave the doorman money and his number ‘if you see her, you call me, doesn’t matter the hour’ he stated after handing the man a large money quantity.
And when nothing happened he decided to go to Rey’s apartment to look for you.
Getting there he tried to remember the floor and number, he had been there before, when Rey and Finn started to date she had thrown a party, and to make you happy Kylo went with you.
Gladly the apartments bell where mixed together and aside each number had the last name of the owners, Kylo saw the apartment was the 20 one and noted, he would ring but she would never allow him up there. An old lady approached opening the door and Kylo enjoyed the opportunity to go up there.
He knocked on the door and was met with Finn. “Hi, Kylo.” Finn answered really surprised.
Kylo wasn’t Finn’s friend and after the club incident, he knew he wasn’t welcome in his house. “Hey, is Y/N here?”
“Babe, who is there?” Rey yelled and walked cleaning her hand on a cloth. “The dinner will burn if-” She stopped and her smile faded. “What do you want Kylo?”
“I want to see Y/N, is she here?”
“No!” Rey answered quickly and Kylo looked at Finn trying to see if it was the truth.
“I don’t believe you.” Kylo answered and stepped inside the place pushing Finn and Rey.
“Dude you can’t enter our house in that way!” Finn shouted and grabbed Kylo’s shoulder.
“Y/N? Y/N?” Kylo shouted and took Finn’s arm out of him. “She ain’t here.” He murmured after looking at the whole place. The apartment wasn’t much big and it was really freed of walls.
“That is what Rey told you, now leave, you are not welcome here.” Finn stated and Kylo shook his head, he didn’t care if he was welcome or not.
“Where is she?” He asked and looked over Finn and Rey trying to find something, any glimpse of a answer.
Rey saw how terrible Kylo looked, his eyes heavy followed by deep dark circles under his eyes. “She is out of town, she needed to breathe and took off.”
Kylo thought about your relatives, but they didn’t live near. “Where?” Rey stood quietly. “Listen, I know we are not friends and I’m sorry for ruining your anniversary, but I need her!” His tone of voice raised and Finn looked at his feet before glaring back at the tall man before him, he looked like a junkie searching for his drug. “Listen,” He reached Rey’s arm and touched it making Finn intervene and stepped in front of his girlfriend. Kylo nodded and walked outside the place but with his hand on the door to make sure they wouldn’t close. “I miss her. I miss her so much. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I- I… I can’t live without her. Please tell me where she is.” Kylo begged.
Finn opened his mouth but Rey quickly raised her hand silent telling him to shut up. “Can’t live without her?” She asked and Kylo nodded. Rey touched the door and with a quick move closed it beating on Kylo’s nose. “Then die!” She shouted and Kylo grunted.
Of course Rey nor Finn wouldn’t help him.
Kylo felt his world ending, he was an idiot to let you slid. He knew he couldn’t ever find someone like you.
Kylo discovered where you were living and walked there wearing a hoodie and jeans, a different look for him. But he needed to talk with you, he needed to open his heart.
Reaching your door he knocked twice and placed his thumb on the peephole, you wouldn’t open if you saw him.
When you opened the door you looked brighter, you were wearing a white flowered dress with your hair slightly wet, you had a smile, until you saw him. Kylo’s heart clenched at how your face saddened quickly seeing him, placing his foot in the door he extended his hands on the air trying to show it was okay. “Y/N, please listen to me.”
You looked at how broken he was… good!
“I’m sorry, I took you from granted and I shouldn’t have. Y/N you are everything, you have no idea how broken I am and I regret all the time I made you cry, we used to be so happy and-” Kylo’s mouth closed and a thin line formed.
Poe appeared behind you and looked at Kylo there. “Y/N everything is okay?”
Your eyes were teary and you blinked it and looked back at Poe. “Yeah, it’s okay.” When you looked back at your door it was empty, Kylo left.
You weren’t dating Poe on that day, a friend was throwing a party and you and Poe would go together, as friends. But on Kylo’s eyes, you picked Poe only to hurt him.
You were walking on the sidewalk with Rey on the phone, she was trying to set you up with Finn’s cousin and you were declining saying you weren’t ready yet. When you turned the corner of your building you saw Kylo there wearing jeans and a green shirt. It was a Thursday and he always worked on Thursdays. “Rey I have to go.” Finishing the call without waiting for her answer you gulped seeing him. “What are you doing?”
Placing his hands in his pants pockets he looked at you closely. “We need to talk.”
Shaking your head your grabbed your keys and walked trying to enter the building. “We don’t.”
Kylo touched your arms and you cringed. He saw it and felt bad of how much he disgusted you. “Please just hear me. And I’ll go.” Taking a deep breath you nodded. Kylo didn’t have a speech ready, he just wanted you back. “What do you want? A house in the sub? I buy it, I quit the job, I do whatever you want Y/N.”
“Kylo I don’t want for you quit your job, it wasn’t work that torn us apart. It was you.” You pointed the obvious.
“Y/N marry me.” He stated and you widened your eyes. “Marry me, we will move together and I will fix it, Y/N I can’t stand being without you.”
“Kylo we can’t be together, you don’t love me anymore and… and I cannot live knowing I’m with someone that doesn’t want me, someone that doesn’t respect me to sit down and fix our problems. Someone that would get home late and don’t tell me what was happening, someone that on the first fight would run away and fuck somebody else!“
Kylo’s eyes were teary and he shook his head. “Listen we can fix it!”
“We cant.“ Kylo tried to grab your hands but you dodge it. A man walking on the sidewalks saw the tears in your eyes and quickly tried to help you.
“Are you okay ma’am?“ He asked and looked at Kylo up and down.
You smiled and nodded. “Its, thank you.” Cleaning your tears with the back of your hands the man nodded slightly but didn’t believe your words.
“Yes, thank you though. I live here, you don’t have to worry.“ The man looked at you again trying to find any hint of a ‘help me‘ sign, but when he found none he left.
“Kylo. I love you. But I let myself love and care for you more than I cared about myself, and I can’t live in that way. We spent good years together, but this is broken, and we can’t fix. Is beyond repair.“ The words hurt you but it was the truth.
Kylo was just as hurt, but Poe’s face came to his mind. “This is because you are dating Dameron?” He asked clearly pissed.
Scoffing at how his mood shifted so fast you looked him deep in his beautiful brown eyes. “We are not together anymore, what I do with my life is only my business.“ Answering coldly you entered your building and closed the door making it lock making impossible for Kylo enter.
The memories still hurt Kylo, 515 days had passed and he still missed you. Kylo hated himself for hurting you, he wanted you back. But you’d moved on.
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