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[corvid-language-library]

Remember that if you want to do more of something, you have to do less of something else. It's that time of year where people set goals for the new year and they have plans and hopes and it's always focusing on what they want to do more of. More studying, more exercise, more crafting, more socialising, more making things from scratch. Okay, great. What are you going to do less of in order to have the time and energy to do more of those things you really want to do?

[corvid-language-library]

And if your answer to this is "less doomscrolling" or "less bedrotting" then great, but please think about why you're doing those things. No one's doomscrolling or bedrotting because they don't have things they'd rather be doing. Actually, I'm willing to bet you have a lot of things you'd rather be doing and you spend your life internally screaming at yourself to do literally any one of the many things you want to be doing instead, but you don't have the energy for them all and you can't work out how to prioritize them, so doomscrolling spares you from making that decision. Or perhaps you're burned out from taking on too many projects and you need to rest your brain, so you lie in bed because you don't even have the energy to get started anymore.

This is going to be a really hard pill to swallow, but the truth is you might not be able to balance all your hobbies and all your projects the way you'd like. If you want to finish writing that book, you might have to reduce your daily drawing habit to a couple of times a week. If you want to do yoga every morning, you might have to accept not cooking from scratch as often. If you want to spend more time with your family, you might have to cut down on your yearly reading goal. I'm not saying give up on your hobbies; I'm be realistic with your time and your energy and be kind to yourself. Stop expecting yourself to do more and do better every single year. You don't have to constantly be growing upwards and reaching for the stars; you can be content with where you are, or even cut parts of yourself back to make space for other things in your life to bloom.

Think about what your priorities are and make peace with doing less of other things. Less is okay. Less is not failing. Less is self care.

[vexheart]

The fine line between wanting to say so much and knowing that it's better to say nothing.

[idleminds]

[quotespile]

“You’re fucked… You thought you were going to be someone, but now it’s obvious you’re nobody. You haven’t got as much talent as you thought you had, and there was no Plan B, and you got no skills and no education, and now you’re looking at forty or fifty years of nothing. Less than nothing, probably. That’s pretty heavy.”

— Nick Hornby, A Long Way Down

[crush-answr]

Okay so my ex bf broke it off with me after 7 months.. and now he’s already dating my best friend.. I told her it hurt, but she doesn’t care and he doesn’t look like he ever cared about me at all.. how should I react to this?

This situation is rather delicate. I’d say that it really depends on how soon they got together. If they did it immediately that is rude and it shows what kind of friend your bff is. If they got together after some time, I think it’s understandable. Not everyone gives up the opportunity to be with their crush (or let’s say interest), just because they’ve dated one of their friends. Also, you have to keep in mind how valuable this friendship is for you. Maybe you’re best friend doesn’t really realise how much this affects you, even though you’ve told her. At the end of the day, you should really re-evaluate your friendship and if you consider that she is more valuable than an ex, just try and understand her side of story. If you think the opposite, you can tell her that you no longer be friends. This decision is up to you, but please think if it’s worth it over a boy. 

[crush-answr]

So I’ve know this guy for two years now. We got to know each other really well for about a year and then I never saw him for the next year, and now I’ve reconnected with him again. We’ve talked a little but not much, and I really just want to tell him that I like him. But my friends keep telling me I should wait. I don’t want to scare him off, but I really just want him to know. What do you think is the best thing for me to do? I hope this makes sense. Haha!

I’d say the same. You should first wait to see how your friendships develops in order to maximize your chances of success. If everything goes well, you can confess, but confessing doesn’t always end up with a relationship, so be prepared for whatever outcome this might have. 

[the-hurt-soul]

2023 was a year of many ups and downs. It was definitely life changing in many aspects. I finally managed to get into the University I wanted, met new people, cut off a few of them, started my dating journey, got my first job and most importantly I have developed my character and personality. I hope 2024 is the year that I start bettering myself tho, because this life I'm living right now can't last forever

[thebookquotes]

“Make a radical change in your lifestyle and begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty.”

— Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild

[thebookquotes]

I used to think the years would go by in order, that you get older one year at a time. But it's not like that. It happens overnight.

— Haruki Murakami, Dance, Dance, Dance

[thebookquotes]

“There are some things about myself I can’t explain to anyone. There are some things I don’t understand at all. I can’t tell what I think about things or what I’m after. I don’t know what my strengths are or what I’m supposed to do about them. But if I start thinking about these things in too much detail the whole thing gets scary. And if I get scared I can only think about myself. I become really self- centered, and without meaning to, I hurt people. So I’m not such a wonderful human being.”

— Haruki Murakami, The Elephant Vanishes

[neckkiss]

[beautifulessencewildmind]

“I’m tired. It’s exhausting giving your all to a person who continuously breaks you. I’m mentally, physically, emotionally worn out. Chasing you drained me. Putting my all into you drained me. I stay up until four in the morning thinking to myself how crazy you have made me. You did this to me. What hurts the most is that we both know you are hurting me, but neither of us want to do anything to stop it.”

— You didn’t see what you were doing

[crush-answr]

So I’ve know this guy for two years now. We got to know each other really well for about a year and then I never saw him for the next year, and now I’ve reconnected with him again. We’ve talked a little but not much, and I really just want to tell him that I like him. But my friends keep telling me I should wait. I don’t want to scare him off, but I really just want him to know. What do you think is the best thing for me to do? I hope this makes sense. Haha!

I’d say the same. You should first wait to see how your friendships develops in order to maximize your chances of success. If everything goes well, you can confess, but confessing doesn’t always end up with a relationship, so be prepared for whatever outcome this might have. 

[crush-answr]

Is it wrong to love a friend very much? I had been told that it is wrong to love a friend so much unless I feel for him otherwise. And all of a sudden, it felt like all of my beliefs were wrong. Why is it wrong to love a friend very much that it hurts so much when he decided to end the friendship off?

Who told you that? Of course it’s not wrong to love a friend very much. It’s like saying that you can’t love your mother very much. It doesn’t make sense. It’s normal to care for a friend, to be hurt when they decide to end the friendship. I’ve been through that so I understand you. 

[crush-answr]

I like this guy and I'm debating whether I should tell him or not. He's way out of my league, but we've been texting for a couple months and have hung out once. He's always giving me mixed signals. he barely initiates a conversation, but he always seems happy to see me/talk to me. Last time I saw him he ran up and hugged me like he hadn't seen me in forever but didn't say a thing and ran off to talk to someone else second after. Idk if he's just being nice or if he might like me

I answered your ask here.

[crush-answr]

I broke up with my boyfriend a week ago but i miss him like crazy and i just wanna message him but idk what to do

Think about the reason behind your break-up. Whose fault was it? Was it anybody’s fault? If you seem fit to reach out to him, I say you should do it. If he’s wronged you try and resist the urge to contact him. 

[vomitingwords]

If Words Could Hold You // ma.c.a