Typical conversation starters:
"Don’t trust anyone, because everybody is a douchebag.“
“That shit is so deep, Adele could roll in it.”
“That’s not even a word, I’m making up words now, just to describe
how terrible my life is!”
“I have no idea what I’m doing…”
“Mama’s pissed right now…”
“I wish I could crush my neighbors with a wall…”
“I don’t know why, but why the fuck not?”
“Look at the shadow…that is terrifying.”
“Don’t say things you’ll regret…don’t say things people can make fun of you over.”
“Oh, that is kinda clever…also kinda annoying.”
“Shh, no tears, only dreams now.”
“Something’s up, I can tell.”
“I’m complementing you, not trying to get into your pants…”
“ I’ve been eating pretzels, they’re so good. Have you ever just opened a bag of salty pretzels and you can’t stop eating them? They’re sooooo good. I want to make love to them…you heard nothing!”
“I actually don’t like seeing you that happy, could you be a little sadder, please?”
“I can barley hear you over the sound of how dead you are!”
“Could you just stop for five fucking minutes?”
“All I did was kiss your wife…”
“Go stick your head in a dick!”
“Die, you mother fucker!”
“That’s bull to the shit!“
“I don’t like five, five can go to hell.”
“Hey! Wake up so I can kill you!”
“Oh yeah, that’s great….I’m so happy you’re talking to me…”
“Here take the phone, it’s your physiatrist, he says you’re an annoying asshole.”
"Rome wasn’t built in a day…and neither were babies.“
“They’re doing the hover hug.”
“___, you lookin’ good!”
“You guys need a sex swing.”
“I’ll finger you, see what happens…”
“Did you get that sweet goat ass?”
“That’s a boy…stop humping the ground.”
“Is this an erotic statue of two men mud wrestling?”
“Should I slap the girl on the ass when she comes out?”
“Why don’t you take me out to dinner first, before you decide to fuck me?!”
“I’m getting smacked with my own snake!”
“Look at these plus one biceps!”
“I’m a pretty little flower!”
“Oh, Jesus Christ, I do have the force!”
“That shouldn’t have worked, but it did.”
“I’M A MOTHER FUCKING DRAGON!“
“I like it, how you can see through all the windows.“
“I came here for the same reason people go to the zoo.”
“That is a nice cauldron, a very fucking nice cauldron…”
“So…how you creepy bastards doin’?”
“This is not gonna be my first time in the bathroom with a goat in my lifetime, and last time was just as fucking magical.“
“You guys are yelling and I want ice cream!”
“Um…hello? Yeah, I’m here with two crazy people. Please get me out of here!”
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